The Shopping List

by Vanilla Mocha

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Second Person, Other, Original Character, Comedy, Random, Adventure, Princess Celestia
Length: 5696

When Celestia can't find the right pony to go shopping for her, she finds a different pony for the job. That different pony is me.

[img]https://i.imgflip.com/foc9a.gif[/img]

[img]http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2015/028/a/f/storyapprovalsoq_png_by_florescentglow-d8fskw7.png[/img]

YES, THIS WAS UNPUBLISHED FOR A WHILE. I BROUGHT IT BACK. :rainbowwild:

My OC, Vanilla Mocha, takes a vacation from her busy home in Applewood and goes to Canterlot for the weekend. Celestia can't find Raven, a white unicorn with brown hair. Vanilla Mocha looks enough like her that it suits the princess. Celestia promises Mocha a 'surprise' for shopping for her in return.

Published 2014-10-13 00:40:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-12-06 00:24:57 UTC

"You'll Do Just Fine."

Hello. My name is Vanilla Mocha, and I am white furred unicorn with messy brown hair. My cutie mark is a yellow star, which means that I am good at imagining and creating things. I live in Applewood, and just last weekend I went to Canterlot, and let's say it didn't turn out so good.

I was walking around, looking at the city. Inside her gold and purple castle Celestia was watching TV. Nopony ever told me about the episode Luna Eclipsed. No wonder nopony ever thinks of me like that! I should demand my own episode. she thought to herself. I mean, look at this! The whole Nightmare Moon incident should make me look like a hero, but those little fans take it like I was being rude! They are the ones being rude!

Celestia sat on her couch in her private living room. She took out her iPhone and looked at the time. Its already lunch time? Wow, I am not even hungry! she thought. Watching her TV, Celestia heard something.Her tummy growled. Forgetting it was lunch time she thought, Huh, I guess this whole Luna Eclipsed thing made me all hungry. Let me see what I have to eat.

She stood up and went to her royal fridge. The royal fridge is covered with a ton of royal magnets that only royals can lay their royal eyes on. "LUNA!" She yelled. "Why did you do this!? You ate all my royal Jello Pudding! YOU ATE ALL OF MY ROYAL BANANA FLAVORED JELLO!" Luna was sleeping in her royal bed so, of course, so she didn't hear her royal angry sister.

Walking out into the regular hallway where royals and non - royals can be together, Celestia called her servant. "RAVEN!"

Raven didn't come.

Celestia called her servant again. "RAVEN!"

Raven didn't come again.

Celestia called her servant again (again). "RAVEN!"

Raven didn't come again (again).

"Where's Raven?" Celestia asked a guard that was standing in the regular hallway.

"She took the day off. She is visiting Applewood this weekend." The guard said.

"Oh. Wait, how'd you know?" Celestia asked the guard with curiosity.

"You told everypony non-stop yesterday." He sighed, not wanting to remember.

(This is what happened yesterday.)
"HEY EVERYPONY! RAVEN'S GOING ON VACATION! RAVEN'S GOING ON VACATION TO APPLEWOOD! RAVEN'S GOING ON VACATION! SHE'LL BE BACK IN TWO DAYS ON MONDAY!" Celestia yelled running, flying, and teleporting herself all around her castle, and soon after she became bored with that she began running, flying, and teleporting herself all around Equestria. "RAVEN'S GOING ON VACATION TO APPLEWOOD, BUT DON'T WORRY! SHE'LL BE BACK IN LIKE TWO DAYS! CAN'T WAIT UNTIL THEN!"

(Back to the present)
"Oh. Okay. Well, I need a replacement." Celestia remembered, walking out of her castle and into the streets of the big city of Canterlot.

Meanwhile, I was roaming the mystical city of Canterlot. Canterlot is so awesome. In Canterlot I saw the old foalhood home of the new princess of Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle. I also saw the archives of Starswirl the Bearded. He looked like a fun guy. And then I saw a blue unicorn doing a magic show. She called herself 'The Great and Powerful Trixie'. Also, I saw some pretty cool landmarks including the Fausticorn Memorial when I bumped into you know who.

I looked up at the alicorn. OH MY GOSH ITS PRINCESS CELESTIA! OH NO, WHY COULDN'T I HAVE RUN INTO LUNA? I thought to myself. She shook her head, then her big pink horse eyes looked down into my small green pony eyes.

"Raven?" Celestia asked, still looking down at me.

"What? Oh, no, your majesty. No, I'm Vanilla Mocha." I said, feeling uneasy.

"Well, you are going to be Raven for today because your name is just way too long for I, Princess Celestia, to remember."

My name is shorter than yours, I thought. Instead, I said, "Just call me Mocha then, you know, for short. And why are you calling me 'Raven', anyways?"

"You are a unicorn that has white fur and brown hair. So does Raven." Celestia said.

"So...?" I asked.

"Raven usually does stuff for me, like take notes and go shopping. Today that's what you're doing." Celestia instructed.

"What do you mean, Princess Celestia?" I asked, feeling confused.

"My sister Luna ate all my Banana Pudding. Can you believe it? She ate something that wasn't a taco! Back to the topic.... so, you are going to the local Walmart to buy me more bananas." Celestia said.

"I guess I can do it..." I mumbled. Thaks a lot, Lulu. Thank you for making me do this. I thought.

"Did I ask you to do it? No, no I did not. But, since you agreed anyway, I don't see any difference. Plus, I'll even give you a reward for it." Celestia added with a wink.

I gulped. A winking princess can't ever mean anything good. Unless if you are the princess winking. But I'm not a princess, so I was worried.

"Just one question, Princess Celestia." I asked, clearing my throat.

"What?" She was getting annoyed.

"I have never done anything like this for anypony with your royal authorities before. I feel nervous, really. And how will I remember what to buy, and things like that?"

"I'll give a quill and paper. You can make my shopping list." Celestia answered.

"Yeah, but I am still nervous. I'm not sure I want to do this." I tried to back out of it.

"You'll do just fine." Celestia said, leading me for her castle.

Author's Note

I don't take any credit for any of the artwork at all. I found them all scattered on Google Images.

"Preferably With Aloe Vera"

Celestia's throne room is so cool. I love the colors in it. It's so goldish and purplish and whitish and marblish and yellowish and lavenderish and so many more colors in between.

"Here you go, Raven." Celestia said, handing me a piece of paper and a quill with black ink.

"I said I am Vanilla Mocha." I sighed.

"That's right, err, Mocha." The princess said.

"What do I buy you?" I asked the royal.

"Lemonade, Jello, Muffins, Swirl, Bread, and Boat." The alicorn responded.

"Huh?" I asked.

"It's probably better if I put it into a song." The princess cleared her throat,
"Bananas, bananas, oh how I love bananas!
Oh how I love to eat you
Nothing else can beat you
Ponies love their normal treats
But I'd rather a banana from the streets

I love bananas, and I love normal meals
so I compromised and it seems pretty ideal
So write my shopping list as I begin to sing
about how you should buy my things

I'd like some banana lemonade
and some banana jello like what Luna ate
Banana flavored muffins would be nice
and Banana Swirl is just bananas, cream, and ice,

To make a banana sandwich all I'd require
is some banana bread (NOW JOIN ME IN MY CHOIR!)
Bananas, bananas, oh how I love bananas!
Bananas, bananas, oh how I love bananas!
Bananas, bananas, oh how I love bananas!"

I wrote down the main things: Banana lemonade, jello, muffins, ice cream (or how celestia says, 'swirl'), and bread.

"But what about 'Boat'? Earlier you said you wanted a boat." I remembered.

"Oh, yes. Banana Boat Sunscreen. Preferably with Aloe Vera." Celestia said.

I wrote that down, too.

"Where's my bits?" I asked the princess.

"What do you mean?" Celestia was confused.

"Give me the bits to pay for your food." I said.

"No, no, no, no! You pay for the food. You want that surprise for today, don't you?

Not really, I thought. But I nodded instead, and walked out.

After I left the amazing throne room I went into the city. Celestia said to go to the local Walmart, but I couldn't find it. "Excuse me, can you help me find the local Walmart?" I asked a blue-gray pegasus with blonde hair.

"I'm Derpy! Oh, and the closest Walmart is four hours from here walking distance. It's right on the Canterlot border line!" The cross-eyed pony said back.

"Oh, well, do you know a store that sells Banana Lemonade?" I asked.

"No." said Derpy.

"Oh, well, do you know a store that sells Banana Jello?" I asked.

"No." said Derpy.

"Oh, well, do you know a store that sells Banana Muffins?" I asked.

"No. And yes." said Derpy.

"Oh, well, do you know a store- wait, what do you mean? No and yes?" I asked.

"I don't know any Banana Muffin stores, but I wish I did. Follow me!" The pegasus exclaimed, jumping up and spreading her wings, and hovering in the air over me.

"Well, where do we go?" I asked her.

"This place right here! The Canterlot Bakery!" The pony said, pushing me into a store.

"Hi Donut Joe!" Derpy said, waving frantically.

"Hey there, Derpy. Raven, is that you? Did you get green contacts?" He said, squinting at me.

"No, I am Vanilla Mocha." I stood up and dusted myself off. Clearing my throat, I said, "I know this is a donut store," I glanced back at Derpy who hovered in the air behind me, "But somepony told me you also make cupcakes. Can you make me some banana cupcakes? But without the icing? They're not really for me, you see. It's for Princess Celestia." I explained.

"'Ight, I'll make 'ya some banana cupcakes with no icing. Anything for you Derpy?" The stallion asked.

"I'll take some Lemon Surprise cupcakes without icing. They can be like muffins! You should really sell muffins, though. I'd buy them!" Derpy hinted.

"Yes, I know, you'd buy them all." Donut Joe sighed.

I looked at the shopping list. One down. Five more to go. Oh joy.

Author's Note

Comment what you think will happen below! :)

"Ugh..."

I was arriving back at the Lemonade Stand. Or I would've if there wasn't so much distractions. And when I say distractions, I mean distractions. Like when you run into old 'friends', Gummy, and a frog. Don't ask. Just read.

I walked down the cobblestone roads of Canterlot. Big city, it is. Real big city. I was taking the bananas and lemons from Tirek to Iron Will, when somepony familiar ran up to me.

"Heeey, Vanilla Mocha! Remember me, ya'know, old pal ole' buddy?" A certain pink earth pony said.

"Yeah, Veronica. I remember you." I sighed, not wanting to bring back the memories.

The pink earth pony with short, blonde hair, both mane and tail, stood before me. Her blue eyes gazed into my soul. I began to worry.

"Sooo, how's it been going? You and your coltfriend get'n 'long fine, ya'know?" The pony asked.

"Yeah, our relatio-"

"That's good, that's good. Hey, sooo, me and my new coltfriend, you've never met him, he's real hott, ya'know. He's a pegasus, ya'know."

I began to tune her out. Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up! I thought, wishing I could just yell it in her face. I started walking.

"Heeey, Mocha! Where ya' going? I was telling 'ya 'bout mah coltfriend!" Veronica yelled, now following me.

"Ugh..." I mumbled.

"Oooh! Is that lemons? I love mah lemons, now! Heeey, remember back in middle school when you'd try to answer the questions to that one teacher, and then I'd but in? I got so many warnings, and red slips, and demerits, and detentions, and suspensions, and finally they just kicked me out? But then I was let back in the next year. Back to that teacher, oh, whatever his name is. He was yellow, ya'know? And we used to make fun of him and call him a lemon? Wasn't that just the best time of your life?"

Better than right here, right now, I thought. Instead, I said, "Yeah... that was... great?"

"See! Somepony agrees with me!" She said.

I continued walking. Then I stepped on something. What the... I look down to find Gummy, Pinkie Pie's pet alligator.

DING! A brilliant idea popped into my head. I picked up Gummy and threw him and Veronica.

"Eew! Eew! Slimy green thing!" She yelled, noticing Gummy on her mane and forehead. Thankfully not realizing I threw it, I ran. Sorry, Gummy. But if you can handle Pinkie Pie, you can handle her. At least for a few seconds, until she becomes overly annoying.

I continue running until I literally bump into somepony else's butt. That stupid frog, Prince Blueblood, turned his 'majestic' head around like an owl, and stares at me.

Finally he brakes the silence. "Why did you run into my big, fat, royal, tush?" He asked me.

"Maybe because it was in the way of where I was going. Seriously, your royal heinous, your rear end doesn't have to be all over Canterlot."

"Did you say, did you call me..." He sounded sad.

"Yeah, I called you heinous." I plainly confessed.

Blueblood whistled, and at once about ten royal police-ponies come out of nowhere.

"Arrest her! She verbally abused me!" Blueblood demanded.

"Wh-what?" I became frightened.

"That's right. First you run into my royal behind, and then you insult me!" Blueblood explained.

"Can I still make my lemonade first?" I ask.

"That's not even legit!" Blueblood finds humor in my statement.

Then, out of all panicky-things to do in circumstances like this, I hoof-faced myself.

Author's Note

I am legit going off improv. ;)

"Hire us: The Fashion Attorneys!"

The Canterlot Courts are a lot like the Canterlot Castle in the architectural design and the colors of paint. Just like the castle, it was so goldish and purplish and whitish and marblish and yellowish and lavenderish and so many more colors in between.

Princess Celestia stood in the front of the room. I knew she'd be judge for two reasons:
1) She is the princess of Equestria.
2) She was wearing the judge wig & the small glasses.

I sat in the defendant's seat at the plaintiff's table. Celestia sat at the judge's bench, and grabbed her gavel, and banged in against the desk a few times. The room quieted down as the princess began to speak.

"Raven!" Celestia said, looking at me.

"I am Vanilla Mocha, your highness." I sighed.

"Err, right. Vanilla Mocha! Where's your lawyer!" She yelled.

"Back in Applewood." I replied, regretting my vacation.

"Well, we'll find you a new one. Does anypony want to be her temporary lawyer?" Celestia asked the room.

A certain blue-gray and yellow pegasus spread open her wings. "I'll do it! I'll be her lawyer!" Derpy shouted, flying from her seat as a spectator and to her new seat next to me at the plaintiff's table.

"Good. Now for Prince Blueblood's lawyer to share with us his arguement." Celestia said, looking over at her nephew's counsel.

A mysterious white unicorn stood up. Her back was covered in a long, light brown coat that covered even her cutie mark. I couldn't see her tail because it was underneath her coat, but I could see a little bit of her mane. It looked like either dark purple or black; I couldn't tell. It was hiding underneath a fedora. Her eyes were hidden behind dark sunglasses. Whoever this lawyer was, she came with fashion. I can imagine the commercial she's from: Do you have pain? Did somepony bump into your butt? Then hire us, The Fashion Attorneys! We'll come to court for you with style! We'll make sure our fedoras always match our coats and horseshoes! And our dazzling shades are just superb! Hire us: The Fashion Attorneys!

Even though she wasn't wearing horseshoes, I think it could still make a pretty good commercial. Have you seen the latest commercials, though? Mine would fit in perfectly.

Back to the story: The pony began talking with a British accent. Our attorneys come with British accents, I added to my mental commercial.

"She- she could've looked where she was going! But no, she ran into him! Then she verbally accuses him for what happened to her, by her! How, how fair is that?" She said.

I looked over at Derpy. The cross-eyed pegasus sat holding a muffin in her right hoof. She was chewing on a bite of it now, and didn't really seem to care about the stylish lawyer. I hoped Derpy would have a better argument than 'The Fashion Attorney.'

Author's Note

Like my other stories, this is all improv.

"Now the jury decides."

Author's Note

This chapter is going completely unedited, so I am sorry for any grammar mistakes or whatever. I'll edit it later, but that'll only change the way I word things if anything. I think it's easier to get the chapters out earlier like this.

"Now the jury decides."

"Rav...Vanilla Mocha, now for your lawyer." Celestia said, looking at Derpy with a confused look.

"Okie-dokie!" Derpy bounced out of her chair, and into the middle of the room.

Clearing her throat, Derpy said, "Hi! My name is Derpy, but others call me Ditzy, or even sometime Ditzy Do for long. You can call me Derpy Whooves if you want the long name for Derpy, too. And you can-"

"Go on with it!" Somepony from the jury yelled.

"Geesh. Well, I have a few things to say. My name is Derpy Whooves, and my new friend Vanilla Mocha isn't really all that guilty. All she did was verbally accuse him, and he could have been stallion enough to not let it bother him- royal or not. If you're royal, you need to set the example for your subjects. So what princie-boy over there's saying is that he wants every single pony in Equestria to sit down in a court room because they were name called. Because they were bumped into. Because they had a small argument over a misunderstanding. Yes, you need to work it out. But going to court? That's just overwhelming. She might have bumped into you, and she might have said that to you, but you didn't know that she's overly stressed and busy today. You didn't know that she has to go shopping for your aunt, Princess Celestia, did you? She has been trying all morning to find the perfect things from her shopping list for her, and when the time began to run out she got stressed because she wanted to do it right. She rushed herself. Wouldn't you do that, too, if you were her? Maybe she didn't mean to call you those things. Sometimes ponies say things they don't mean when they are mad, sad, stressed, overwhelmed, or even excited. Please don't take this argument to the extremes. It's just like something foals would fight about." Derpy sat down.

She... she actually did pretty good. Better than I had imagined, really. I thought, glancing over at Derpy, who continued eating her muffin.

"Thank you," I whispered.

"You're welcome." She whispered back.

'The Fashion Attorney' came to the floor again. "I have something to say. I agree with Mrs. Whooves, and I rest my case." With that, she threw off her coat, glasses, and fedora.

I couldn't believe it. As her bright blue eyes looked at me, I suddenly realized who it was. Rarity? Why is she here? I don't care! She's awesome! She and Derpy are the best lawyers ever! I wanted to scream it, but I kept it sealed inside my mouth, which was in a big, tight grin.

"And you, princie, needs to grow up! You are such a disgrace. Ooh, did I verbally abuse you? But I'm your lawyer. You can't bring me to court, because I don't think you're going to find another lawyer that'll work with you. I only agreed because I wanted to see if you changed. I was hoping you did. But, no! You are that same, ugly, good for nothing foal-minded brat!" Rarity yelled.

"Preach it!" hollered Derpy.

"Now the jury decides." Celestia said, beating her gavel on the table.

"Vanilla Mocha...." a first one said,

"Is innocent." another one finished.

"Thank you! Thank you!" I said, remembering to stay calm.

Prince Blueblood snorted out of disgust, but I didn't care.

"Thank you, Derpy. Thank you, too, Rarity. You both are just too awesome!" I said.

"No problem. And I've been meaning to scream that in Blueblood's face for a while." She smiled as she talked.

As I was leaving court, I would've forgotten about the shopping list if Derpy hadn't mentioned it in court.

Let's see, I have the muffins, the ice-cream-swirl-junk, and I'm about to get the lemonade stuff, I thought, turning down Lemon Lane to Iron Will's Custom Lemonade Stand.

"G- good?"

I approached Iron Will's Custom Lemonade Stand. It was almost dinner time, and I was getting a little hungry. It was only 5:15, and dinner began around 6:00. If I want dinner without any stress, I thought, I'll have to get the shopping done first.

"Mr. Iron Will?" I asked, seeing the bull wasn't at his booth.

"He's at bathroom break." Donut Joe said, standing at the back door to his shop.

"Oh... do you know when he'll be back?" I asked, sighing.

"Hey! Iron Will need a plunger in here!" A familiar voice shouted from inside the bakery.

"I don't know if he'll be out any time soon," Donut Joe said, turning to go inside.

"Oh, alright." I closed my eyes. This can't be happening to me! Why, Celestia?! Why? Why? Why? And some ponies wondered why I joined the Lunar Republic...

Suddenly I heard a splash. WHOOSH

"Ugh! You overflowed it!" a stallion's voice said in an angry tone, probably Donut Joe's.

"Iron Will is sorry." The bull mumbled.

I sighed again. If I was to get anything done, it wouldn't be here. I knew I had over items to get, so I went about my business doing that.

I trotted into a supermarket. I purchased some banana jello and a loaf of banana bread. Two down, total of four. All I need is the Banana Boat and the Banana Lemonade, I reminded myself.

I checked out, and was about to walk out of the store when a certain blue earth pony from school stopped me. His short and spiky purple and yellow hair had never changed from high school.

"How's it go'n?" Pixie Stick , an old friend, greeted me.

Please not another pony from school!, I prayed, but no, it was him.

"G- good?" I said, faking a cheap smile.

"That's nice. Hey, want some candy?" He asked, holding out some jelly beans.

"Oh, uh, sure?" I accepted, remembering how he would give everypony candy at lunch.

"Thank you." I added, before putting them in my mouth.

"No prob. So, you're shopping?" Such a stalker question. A rhetorical one, too.

Duh, I thought. But instead, I said, "Yeah."

"That's nice." He replied.

An idea blew into my head. "Hey, Pixie. How about you help me with something?" I asked, still faking a smile.

"Sure. What?" He asked, looking curious.

"Can you buy some Banana Boat for me? I'll be over at Iron Will's Custom Lemonade Stand behind Donut Joe's Bakery." I spit it out.

He stared at me, shocked. Then, with a shrug, he replied, "Sure, why not?" He proceeded into the store.

I sighed, only this time from relief.

"Iron Will! Get more toilet paper!" Donut Joe shouted from inside. I stood outside like before, only this time I had some hope. All I needed was the lemonade, and I'd be done. If I'd ever get the lemonade.

Author's Note

This chapter is unedited. If you see any mistakes in grammar or whatever, just tell me politely in the comments. Thank you!

Fun Fact- I really did know 'Pixie Stick' in school.

"No Problem!"

"Hey, Vanilla!" I heard Pixie's faint voice in the distance.

"Did you get the Banana Boat?" I asked, hoping that the lemonade would be the only thing left.

"Sure. Here you go!" Pixie Stick replied, ~~handing~~ hoofing me the sunscreen.

"Thanks, Pixie!" I was so excited. All I need is the lemonade, then I'll be back to my Canterlot vacation!, I reminded myself.

"No problem!" The stallion said.

I paid him for the sunscreen, then he trotted back down the alley. Then, I heard a flush.

Iron Will came walking out.

"How can Iron Will help you today?" Iron Will asked me.

"Look, I have some bananas. You said you'd make me banana lemonade if I got these. Here." I sat them on the booth.

"Okie-dokie. Let Iron Will start the magical lemonade process." The bull said, turning on his blender.

The banana lemonade was done.

"How much do I owe you?" I asked him.

"Bit." Iron Will replied.

"How many bits?" I asked, feeling confused.

"This much." Iron Will flapped his ears up against his head.

This is crazy! I'm going to be crazy before today's over!, I thought. "Fine. Two ears, two bits. Are you satisfied?"

"No. Two ear, one head. Two plus one is seven. Seven bits." Iron Will argued.

"That makes no sense!" I said back.

"One head is a combination of other number! One head mean two eye, two nostril, one mouth. So therefore, one head is five. Five plus two is seven. So, you owe me seven bit." Iron Will said.

"What?! But that-"

"Do you want your lemonade?" Iron Will asked me.

"Ugh! Fine! Here's your seven bits!" I said, putting the rest on the booth. I used my yellow magic aura, and took the lemonade with me.

"Have a nice day!" Iron Will said, waving. I could hear Donut Joe laughing.

Finally! I have the banana lemonade, banana jello, Banana Boat, banana swirl, banana muffins, and the banana bread!, I thought to myself. Now, to give these to Princess Celestia! Then, I'll be done.

Author's Note

This is going unedited, so please tell me in the comments nicely if you see any mistakes in the story. (BTW- Iron Will is supposed to talk in 3rd person, and he does not use plurals.)

"Bruh?"

I ran into Celestia's throne room. As I bowed sweat ran down my face, but I didn't care. I had completed the shopping list!

"Rave- I mean, Vanilla Mocha, I see you have bought everything. Please, present me with my gifts." Celestia's voice echoed.

"Your majesty," I said, using my yellow aura to pick up the merchandise, "The banana lemonade, banana jello, banana swirl, banana bread, banana bread, and your Banana Boat." I quickly said in one breath, still panting.

"Hmm," Celestia used her magic to pick up the items one by one, inspecting them carefully.

"Banana lemonade's good..." she mumbled.

I stood feeling nervous. My stomach turned as I awaited the princess' answer.

"Banana bread is good..."

If Pixie did this right, I'll be good, I thought.

"Vanilla Mocha, this Banana Boat..." Celestia began, staring at me. Those eyes. Those scary princess eyes.

"This isn't what I wanted."

"What?! It's Banana Boat Sunscreen! How can you not want it?!" I wanted to scream, but I kept it at a low tone.

"I said I wanted it with Aloe Vera. This has none." The ruler said, her voice bellowing.

"Your majesty, if I may-"

"Quiet! I will see that there is an end to this."

"What do you mea-"

"I said quiet! Now, I want you to become a better messenger for me, Princess Celestia, so I will enroll you in my personal school for talented unicorns where you'll learn how to be more like me!" The princess smiled.

"Bruh?" I asked, feeling confused.

"Great! School starts in August, so I'll see you then! Until then, go off. I don't want to see your presence anymore."

Same to you, I thought, feeling happy and worried at the same time. I completed the shopping list... but now I've gotta make another one for school supplies. And Pixie won't help this time!

Trotting off into the sunset, I facehoofed myself.

Author's Note

I might write a sequel, but I'm not sure. :trollestia:

Also, this is unedited so if you see any mistakes please let me know in the comments politely.

"The I.W.C.L.S.?"

"Okay, so I have the banana muf- uh, cupcakes. Thank you both for helping me. Does anypony know where I can buy some banana jello?" I asked the derped mare and the tired stallion.

The mare shook her head. "Sorry, but I don't." She said with her mouth full of icing-less cupcake.

"I know. Go to the I.W.C. L.S. down the road." Donut Joe said.

"The I.W.C.L.S.?" I asked.

"The Iron Will's Custom Lemonade Stand." The stallion said.

"Okay..." I said, feeling confused.

"To get there just turn around, walk out the doors, turn left, go straight, and turn left again when you get the the end of my building. Turn left again when you get to the end of my building." Donut Joe said.

I thanked them again and followed the stallion's directions. I turned around at the back of his building and saw Donut Joe and Derpy standing at his back door. "You guys had a back door, and didn't tell me?" I asked.

"Yes." Derpy said.

"Ugh!" I mumbled. I turned around, and saw a booth. A paper sign with red crayon on it said "Iron Will's Custom Lemonade Stand. I rolled my eyes.

A blue bull looked at me. "Hello and welcome to Iron Will Custom Lemonade Stand, where your lemonade dream come true."

"Nice motto. Can you make me some banana lemonade?" I asked.

"Buy Iron Will some banana and some lemon. Then Iron Will will make you the banana lemonade." The bull demanded.

"You don't have lemons?" I asked him.

"No. Iron Will got bored, so Iron Will ate all of Iron Will banana. You have problem with that?" He asked.

"No, no I don't..." I backed up.

"Good. If you want some of Iron Will Custom Lemonade Stand, you must buy some banana and some lemon and then Iron Will will make it into your banana lemonade."

"Where can I buy lemons and bananas?" I sighed.

"Iron Will know." Iron Will said.

"Well, where?" I asked.

"Iron Will forgot." Iron Will said, scratching his chin.

"Ugh!" I said.

"Don't worry, pony! Iron Will has alternative!" He said.

"Well, what is it?!" I became impatient.

"Go down to the Ponymart on Lemon Lane. Turn right and head down Banana Boulevarde. Then you should be there." Iron will said.

"I can't believe this." I mumbled.

"Well, you should. Look over there!" Donut Joe said, pointing towards a road sign.

Derpy flew over to it and crashed. She knocked the sign over. I walked over to it.

"Lemon Lane..." I read, mumbling.

"You must be on your way to get Iron Will some banana and some lemon for your banana lemonade Iron Will must make for you." Iron Will said.

I sighed. Will this day get any worse? I thought.

Author's Note

Comment below what you think will happen next!

"Trolls, and now trolls in Cadillacs?!"

So I was on my way to get some bananas and lemons for some banana lemonade at a custom lemonade stand ran by a guy named Iron Will for Princess Celestia. If Celestia is trying to troll me, she's gonna get it when I return! I thought. I was just casually walking down the street when Tirek pulls up in a light gray Cadillac.

"TIREK?! What the freak? How'd you get out of prison?" I asked.

"No, no, no. I'm Maud Pie, and I am a Tirek Cosplayer. I like rocks." A monotone pony said.

"Are you trying to troll me? I mean, seriously? Trolls, and now trolls in Cadillacs?!" I asked.

"No. I have a message for you." She replied.

"Oh, alright..." I said, still wondering if everypony was working together to troll me.

Maud held up a Magic 8 ball. "It told me you needed bananas and lemons." she said, now staring into my soul.

"How does that tell you- you know, I don't care anymore." I sighed.

"Get in the car." Maud said.

"No way! I barely even know you." I said.

"Okay." Maud drove off.

Everypony has problems here! I have to go home to Applewood when I'm done. I thought.

I continued walking. Forget the lemonade. You'll get that later, I decided.

I walked into a gas station. "Do you by any chance sell ice cream? Possibly banana flavored?" I asked the stallion behind the counter. The weirdest things are at gas stations. The light purple stallion looked like he could be a pegasus rock star, with long fluffy black hair with red tips. He had lip piercings, and his cutie-mark was a mop.

"Nah. But I do sell something close. It's called Banana Swirl, which is basically like banana ice cream." His husky voice said.

I should've known. Banana Swirl, okay, I've got it now. I felt stupid.

I bought some so-called banana swirl, and began trotting out the double-doors of the gas station when a dark gray Cadillac pulls up beside me.

"What, Maud?" I asked the driver, who looked like Tirek.

"Oh, nah. That's just may marefriend doing some Cosplay of me from that show that the new Ponyville princess stars in." The deep voice said. His yellow eyes starred at me.

"What?" I asked, feeling confused.

"She drives a light gray Cadillac. My car is dark gray. Here's some bananas and some lemons for you. Maud said her Magic 8 ball told her to tell me that. Now, if you excuse me, I have some rocks I need to deliver to her." He threw the food out the passenger window at me and drove off leaving me in smoke and dust. I coughed and shook my head. Life hates me, I thought.

Author's Note

Comment below what random thing you think will happen next!