In Love With Fiction

Derek Allan was, by all accounts, a social recluse. Part of it was a slight cynicism- developed from multiple disappointments- that kept him from talking to other people, but another part was just the general introverted shyness that had been a part of him since birth. He had friends growing up, but they had slowly turned into acquaintances once high school and college came around. He had made a few other friends in that time but those friendships were very short lived, as his interest in gaming and general internet lurking were much more preferable than hanging out in person. Even online friends were scarce to him, but those at least seemed a little more understanding of his being a loner. Thus, the only relationships he ever really had were with characters from video games and the occasional anime or cartoon. Like so many of his age group, he had developed a strong affection for a show that was originally intended for little girls.

The sensation that was My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic had captured his attention ever since season one aired, though- also like many males in his age group- he had initially wanted nothing to do with it. He quickly developed an appreciation for the ‘mane’ six, but his true affections lay with the adorable Fluttershy. It started innocently enough with just being smitten with the character. MLP:FIM had been one of the few shows where he initially disliked the idea that so many artists and fan-fiction writers were implementing rule 34 as if it were supposed to be taken seriously. Even just slightly saucy pictures posted on Equestra Daily were met with a momentary contemptuous glare before he quickly scrolled down the list. As time moved on and his fondness for Fluttershy grew into desire, his adamant behavior against graphic content of the show eventually deteriorated.

He knew it wasn’t exactly a mentally healthy state of mind to actually fall in love with a fictional character, much less have more physical desires for her, but it was one part of him that he refused to let go of. He had had crushes before, even possibly fallen in love once with a cute girl from school; but due to his lack of interaction with anyone, it never grew to anywhere near the types of feelings had for Fluttershy. His fantasies grew bolder as he went from imagining what the perfect date with her would be like to how the most sensual night with her would occur.

Soon fantasies and images weren’t enough and the desire for tangibility grew. The closest he could think of were body pillows and dakimakuras, and he couldn’t believe his luck when he stumbled upon one daki in particular that had been discontinued almost a year before due to legal restrictions. She was the perfect version of an anthro Fluttershy, drawn by one of his favorite pony artists, and she was up for auction by the manufacturers. Derek was usually the type to dismiss auctions of desirable and popular items, seeing as how they usually went to price ranges way beyond being reasonable for the item in question. Reason was abandoned in that time, and he bid furiously until finally he won the auction at the price of $500. Despite the dent in his bank account he felt no remorse for it, and was even less sorry for his purchase when she arrived four days later.

He didn’t recall ever feeling the peach skin material before, but it felt more incredible to touch than he could have imagined. As his excitement for his victory made him forget to also purchase an actual body pillow, he settled for stuffing it with three of his own regular pillows for a time.

He could hardly keep himself from cuddling her with every moment he could spare. While she may not have been living and breathing, the act of holding something even close to that was a comforting and elating experience. He’d lightly nuzzle against her face and gently rub his hands over her tummy, thighs, and petite rump. He’d even give her little pecks on the cheek.

As with any object of desire, he soon became libido driven to try and see what it would feel like against his arousal. While he could do no more than rub himself against her, the sensation of the silk-like peach skin material against his stiff, sensitive erection combined with the hesitant but wanting eyes of Fluttershy was better than any feeling he had felt before. It was as close to a gentle lovers touch as he had ever gotten before. He had never been one to moan when pleasing himself before, but as this was more heavily sensual than any moment he had ever masturbated, noises escaped him that he thought weren’t possible. He had gasped and whispered her name, then felt a sudden surge of pleasure that he never knew just saying a name could do. Hearing himself making these noises was more erotic than he would have thought possible, and he wished that he could stay in that cloud of ecstasy forever. However, all good things must come to an end, and before he climaxed he turned away from her and finished on himself with an intensity and volume that he had never in his life ever come close to achieving. Despite the very small patches of pre that coated her groin, he didn’t wish to sully her with his seed.

It was one of the greatest, most satisfying experiences he had ever done, and only when he had finally descended from his cloud did his desire for her to be real intensify. If this alone had felt so good, he could only imagine what a moment like that with the real Fluttershy could have been like. To see her move without having to do so for her, to hear her own noises of pleasure, to smell her hair and feel her soft lips against his. He nearly cried at the thought, knowing that it would never be possible. No real girl could ever be close to being like the real Fluttershy.

Months went by, and he lived in contentment with his dakimakura. He had resigned himself with the knowledge that Fluttershy didn’t and never would truly exist, but he was happy she could exist in some sort of physical form. She could still comfort him when he felt down by being someone (Or something if you wanted to be cynical and technical about it) he could hold. She was rejuvenating in his arms, and waking up next to her in the morning was as beautiful as any sunrise (not that he saw the sun very much anyway).

One night, when walking back home from a closing shift at the department store he worked at part-time, he chanced a look up at the night sky. One of the street lamps was burnt out, and for once he could see more than blackness hanging over him. There were more stars than he had seen in years; not since he last visited his grandfather in the countryside when he was just a kid. A few of the silver pin-pricks winked at him, and as he gazed at them a little longer a silver streak crossed his vision and disappeared as fast as a lightning strike.

Derek looked on incredulously. He didn’t remember ever seeing a real shooting star before, not even in the clearer skies above his late grandfather’s country home. Childish as it was, he closed his eyes and formed a wish in his mind. The scent of autumn leaves and the brush of the cool night air against his face helped him visualize the living, breathing anthro Futtershy he longed for all those months ago standing in his room, smiling meekly at him with those lovely eyes looking upon him innocently, but with a hint of desire.

An unexpected gust smacked him out of his reverie, bringing him back the dim, deserted sidewalk in the bland neighborhood he called home. He scoffed at himself for doing something so silly and juvenile, after finally getting over the reality of fantasy never becoming so. It was a very disgruntled walk back home from then on. He made himself some instant cocoa to try and lighten his mood when he got home, then confined himself to his room in front of his computer to watch a few of his favorite Pony episodes. Sleep was heavy on his eyelids soon, he crawled into bed and cuddled affectionately against 'Fluttershy' and in a matter of moments he was fast asleep.

That night he had a dream of being in what looked like a cottage. It was very quiet, save for the occasional scampering of tiny feet or short, bright twitters. It was dark outside and there were only a few candles burning in the room. Just then he heard footsteps lightly patting towards the room and the cooing of a lullaby from a soft and sweet voice. Derek could only see a silhouette through the doorway, and though the shape looked odd at first the person was definitely female. As she stepped into the candle light his breath caught in his chest. The light pink hair, the creamy yellow coat, the elegant yet delicate wings, and those innocent turquoise eyes; he was in the home of his beloved.

While he must have stood out in the room, gawking at her like he was, she seemed to act as if he wasn’t there. She even looked straight at him, but gave no hint of surprise or fear or even wonder as to why a strange young man, foreign to her world, was in her bedroom.

She was only wearing a bath robe, which soon came off and was hung on a hook next to her wardrobe. She glided her naked, angelic body around the room and blew out the candles, then slipped under a thick layer of quilts with an equally angelic sigh of contentment as she drifted off to sleep.

Derek was frozen on the spot. This felt too real to be a dream, but the fact that she didn’t even notice him made him think that it must have been. He steeled himself, and as quietly as he could- which really may not have been necessary, because if she couldn’t see him she likely couldn’t hear him either- he slipped over to the side of her bed. The look on her sleeping face was the epitome of serenity. One would think her the happiest being alive, one who had never suffered any misfortune in her life. Though he felt he shouldn’t Derek tentatively stretched out his hand to her soft-looking cheek; but before his fingertips could even grace a single hair on her, he found himself awake and lying in his bed once more.

His eyes were still shut, and he clenched them as if to try and force himself back to sleep and will that heavenly dream to return. He had unintentionally tightened his grip on his body pillow, but then he noticed that what he was hugging was way more solid than a pillow. His consciousness quickly returned as curiosity and confusion pelted his brain. There was an outline of something with a more definite shape next to him under his covers, warmth was radiating into his arms from the fur of whatever he was holding, something from behind it was brushing against his knee and there was a slight pulsing around the middle of it like it was breathing. He slowly lifted an arm, half-scared of what he might find as he lifted away the covers.

To his utter bewilderment it seemed that his dream had transcended reality; for the one being he thought could never exist was lying asleep next to him with the same exact look of innocent serenity on her face as in his dream. Fluttershy, the love of his life… was real!