Seasons of Darkness

Pain…..

Why was it always pain in his direction?

Derrick’s mind raced with the depressing realization of who it was that marked his skin with such a blistering reminder, that he was never going to be out of the troubles of his new life.

Gasping, coughing for a shred of breath, he clutched the wound and watched in his teary vision the unforeseen clash of Celestial and the supposed caretaker who he thought was a friend.

But underneath the story she spewed was a snake that had struck him, and now he was learning painfully not to trust, not to listen.

Not to feel for newcomers…..

“You dare strike my cousin!”

Celestia mustered what little light remained beneath her darkness and blindly fired scorching beams at Lilith. Her aim is as poor and a new recruit as tried to remain focused on the lifeforce of the traitor.

She couldn’t do it all though. Derrick knew this without a doubt that the blind made couldn’t concentrate, defend him, and fight the unicorn all by herself. She is crippled as is and with little space to fight without getting close the battle already taking place between the dark rulers and the gorger.

He leaned up, only to curl back into a ball when the two mares fought violently near him, almost trampling his shaking body with magic wildly flying the area. Rocks crumbling, the cliff side breaking, bookshelves roaring in flame, he was trapped and suffering the poison with no one to help and nothing to protect him.

Even his new pet, Zelda, was struggling vigorously to keep the gorger from turning the tide of battle to its favor and devour anyone that got too close.

“Derrick, get up!”

He looked back up to Celestia pushing Lilith into a wall and restraining her.

“You have to get up and run.” His gaze met hers, desperation and sorrow he could see clearly. “Forget about me and Haze, just get up and leave this place!”

Derrick took those words to heart and mind as his cousin was shoved away and cut by Lilith’s blade.

The scream, the horrible scream of pain reminded him all too well of the despair of his sister living by a thread when he hospitalized her.

A memory he despised himself for.

It hurt. It hurt everything that made him into the person he became that day and he grasped his head to the sharp agony of his memories.

“Not again….”

“DERRICK, GET UP!”

He couldn’t think or hear the cries of the blind alicorn, each convulsing flash of his sister dying and his feet retreating him from the sight of what meant to him the most, taking her last breath with not his hand to hold hers.

He was a coward, a joke of a man who never forgave himself for leaving the room when he was needed the most.

Mutters of denial and hate breathing past his lips.

“I couldn’t do it then.” He told himself, his senses ignoring the dangers that surrounded him. “I can’t help anyone now. No matter how hard I try I always fail.”

Gritted teeth, bleeding tears and a cracked mind, Derrick was being swallowed by his own emotions and descending deeper to the blackness that consumed him before and had no care for himself should death be the final sight.

He just wanted the memories, the pain, the emotions, to do only thing he desperately commanded in a whisper.

“Stop it……”

He could barely hear the laughter of Lilith whilst clawing at his own head, trying to dig the pain out as if it were some parasite crawling beneath his skin.

“Derrick, you have to fight!” He didn’t look up to Celestia struggling to hold Lilith at bay so as to not reach him for another blow.

“If you don’t fight you will die!”

“Stop it!” He ran his nails deeper, drawing his own blood before the wound instantly shut.

You couldn’t save me

He heard as clear as day…..

His sister.

”You ran away and let me die alone. How can you call yourself my brother?

He twitched, he gasped……….he hated.

“I SAID STOP IT!”

Darkness, pure, cold, unforgiving darkness clouding his mind oozed beneath where he sat and the sense of reality splintered.

His screams of pain echoed to all ears and forced them to stop with the unsightly growth that was his power rapidly ascending around his body.

His spine cracked, another tendril sprouting right after the other until the screams stopped with the eighth slamming into the ground with a powerful earth-quaking pierce.

“I WANT IT ALL TO STOOOOP!”

The pain…

The self-hatred…..

Manifestation of the only emotion he could truly feel past the fears and regrets of himself……

Fury.

A cry so confusing yet powerful it paused the conflict and forced his presence to be fixated.

“NO MORE!”

Another tendril, and another, bursting and lashing around and striking all within vicinity of Derrick as unleashed a presence of magic that made it almost choking. And extension of his person, he felt something be struck by his tendrils yet continued to sink in the rage that ensued.

He cursed under his breath, then shot a piercing gaze at Lilith.

His pain was unbound.

“YOU!”

The tendrils shot at her and missed, but only once before redirecting to her with better precision. Her cries of pain when they ensnared the traitorous pony could not compare to the scream blistering Derrick’s throat, his magic exploding.

“BURN!” He snapped and electricity shot through him to Lilith, an intensity that scorched her body instantly as the others watched in awe of his sudden change.

“Derrick?” Nightmare Moon questioned this side of her beloved in witness of the gentleness disappearing in those eyes she adored.

Those blood-red eyes swimming with what seemed to her to be bloodlust.

Hate, but also a smile grew on his lips.

“You want to play games with me?” He ignored Lilith’s cries and raised her high above, stretching his appendages. “THEN LETS PLAY!”

Swiftly he commanded said tendrils and slammed Lilith into the unforgiving ground, a chuckle underneath his breath.

This wasn’t him, not to Nightmare Moon. She dreamt of the day he would finally bloom into the powerful deity he was meant to be, but she didn’t recognize the creature that repeatedly slammed the traitor into the ground and cackled harder each painful screech that escaped her lips.

This wasn’t the man she loved.

“What’s wrong?” He taunted Lilith and dragged her twitching form to eye level, enjoyment of her burnt form broken and mangled. “I thought you wanted to kill me!”

The horrors of a broken mind, born flawlessly and personified with energies beyond thought flowed with each scream Lilith breathed underneath the torture of Derrick’s broken shell.

His body twisted and reformed slowly to every passing second of his first prey splashing her blood across his face.

He licked the red on his lips…..and grinned deeply, until there was no room left in his face and the newly shining canines extended over his lower teeth.

“Delicious!”

His pain become hunger, and he tossed Lilith aside with a quick gaze to the monster that now pinned Chrysalis and Sombra.

He ignored the calling of his name and willed the thrust of his tendrils piercing the beast before it could snap its jaw on the weakened changeling.

The cries of the gorger tickled his mind, goosebumps across his now greyed skin.

“My turn.” He chuckled.

A quick raise of the impaled monster, and Derrick threw it across the floor with the collapse of stone and bookshelves followed. The group was amazed yet worried when they turned back to the young lord and recognized him only by the clothes he wore that were now tearing at the seams of his transformation.

Claws, fangs, horns, a symbol that blazed his torso….

This wasn’t Derrick, this was a demon……and it worried everyone.

“Get up!” Derrick hurled a boulder at not-yet recovered gorger. “I SAID GET UP YOU SACK OF SHIT!”

He walked past his shocked beloved and tossed another boulder, which knocked the beast back into the rubble it escaped from.

“COME ON MOTHERFUCKER!” He extended his tendrils and pierced it once more for satisfaction.

“COME ON! His roar echoed as said tendrils relentlessly attacked the screeching beast. “GET UP AND FIGHT. I WANT TO MAKE YOU SUFFER!”

“Derrick, that’s enough!”

His ears rang to that voice of worry, and spun to find the one that held his arm, vulnerable to his touch, be the same mare that wanted him to come out his shell in the first place.

“Stop it!” Nightmare Moon pleaded, her magic nullified by his touch. “You’ve wounded the beast. Now let us leave before it can recover.”

Derrick didn’t understand this mare’s statement. How could she beg him to stop when the entirety of their relationship it was her trying to bring out the power that made him this way.

How could she not understand his pain?

The scowl on his face frightened her

“Get off me!” He shoved the alicorn back and resumed his approached to the downed gorger, ready to feed his hunger for pain.

But he was stopped…….again?

“Derrick this isn’t you!” Nightmare Moon grabbed the pained man once more, and his glare met her tears.

“Please…..” She couldn’t speak properly. “Don’t lose yourself.”

A growl followed with the raise of his fist as he struggled to break the hold of her wings. His eyes showed no conscience, but a bright hatred for the mare that continued to plead.

“Derrick this isn’t you!” She ignored his struggles. “You are kind and gentle. You do not carry hate in your heart and I refuse to let you carry it now!”

He thrusted a punch but felt his mother’s hoof hold him at bay.

“LET GO NOW!” He demanded, and the tendrils turned on them.

“Derrick, listen to us!” Raven order as she casted tendrils of her own to stop his. “Your magic is fueling your emotions and it’s turning you!”

He roared in the struggle but couldn’t break free.

“If you don’t stop you will be become corrupted!” She helped Nightmare Moon hold the screaming lord to the ground.

No one else dared get close when thrashes of mother, son, and lover thrashed with magic that tore apart the ground beneath them.

“Derrick! Nightmare Moon forced his gaze to hers. “Focus on me and come back!”

He tried to bite the mare but was met with his mother having muzzled his mouth with a tendril.

“Please come back to me!”

It didn’t matter in that moment of despair where Lilith or gorger were. Danger was silenced with cries of desperation as the cavern shook to the radiated magic.

“It’s me!” Nightmare Moon screamed. “You’re moon!”

“Uh……ladies!” Discord added his voice and pointed past the two. “You might want to pause on Derrick.”

Nobody realized what the chaos god meant until the explosion of rock rang in all the ears in said cavern.

Realization had struck.

“The cavern can’t remain intact!” Somber yelled, his gaze lowered back to the fight at hand. “Hurry up!”

In that moment, Black Hole Sun forced her way in the fight and raised a barrier across the ceiling. She struggled yet remained focused with her chaotic lover having decided to aid her as soon she demanded that the two alicorn a hurry their intentions.

“We can’t hold this forever!” Discord grunted, his glare meeting Nightmare Moon. “Try something other than talking!”

The Moon Queen nodded but was puzzled as to what she could do to bring her human out of his pained rage.

Thought after thought rushed by the intensity of their situation.

“Hurry!”

“I’M TRYING! She barked at the draconequss.

Finally it birthed, a thought to the past that she realized was a chance to bring Derrick back.

She rested her head in his neck and rubbed her hoof on his chest, while shushing the fury.

“It’s okay.” She whispered, then shushed in his ear. “You’re okay.”

She continued and prayed for his voice to reach his mind.

“It’s not your fault. It never was your fault.”

Derrick roared but felt her touch, then heard his queen.

“It was alway too much, but you’re no longer alone.” She cried and pecked his check. “You don’t have to carry it alone any longer.”

He calmed his rage, but not his pain.

“It’s my fault.”

He met the gaze of his mate when she raised her head to him, unable to hide his tears.

His cry was met by tears of her own.

“My sister died alone because I ran away.” He chocked a breath and tried to hide his face when Raven released him. “I couldn’t help her and now a fucking monster is hurting everyone.”

He drowned in his thoughts, yet felt the hoof of his mare pull his arm from his eyes.

“Derrick, listen to me.” He stared at the alicorn. “Your sister is not your fault and we are all here because we love you.”

He turned to the dark creator that nuzzled his other cheek.

“She’s right.” Raven agreed. “You are part of this family and we will die to keep you safe. You are her lover. You are my son and a beloved friend to others.”

“No matter your pain.” Nightmare Moon held his hand in her wing. “We will always be ready to help you face your challenges.”

Finally his thoughts broke from the guilt, and he rose from the ground with the hell of both mares before he turned to see the damage everyone had taken to protect him from the rising monster.

Blood and sweat on all ponies and even Discord.

Derrick finally felt what he believed to never come his life once more.

The feeling of being loved……truly loved.

“Let’s get out of here.” All heads nodded in agreement and he looked past to find Violent Haze and the real Celestia already having recovered. “Ready to leave?”

“Buck yes!” Violent Haze turned away from the group. “Follow me!”

Derrick followed quickly with his mare at his side.

“We will have doctors see to your transformation.” Nightmare Moon informed as she nuzzled him again.

Derrick had not a clue what the alicorn meant until he looked at his hand and saw that both his skin was grey and his fingernails were now claws having extended a good deal.

“Woah.” He looked back to his smiling mare. “Did I do this?”

“Yes.” She responded, and he felt regret. “But it’s a good look, so long as your heart doesn’t darken as well.”

Her words encouraged him a budding confidence; enough that he met the approval of his friends’ nods as they approached the opening.

“But don’t let it cloud the situation.” Black Hole Sun reminded with a cold glare. “You allowed yourself to lose control and became a danger to everyone.”

“I know, and I’m sorry.” He said quietly, but not quite enough.

“You can be sorry by mastering yourself and your power when we return.” She scolded, meeting a harsh glare of her sister.

Derrick silenced himself at the scrutiny of black hole sun as she released her magic in hope that the collapse would be far enough from them and bring the gorger to its final entrapment.

But alas…..

“DERRICK!”

He felt Celestia shove him and Nightmare Moon to the ground, and looked up to find the gorger had somehow recovered. His face pales in horror of the sudden snap of its jaws and the blind sun goddess’ bloodied hood fall to his legs.

His eyes blanked in shock, a threshold of pain muffled in the monsters closed maw.

“CELESTIA!”

Everyone was still to the laughter of the beast and its last chomp before spitting out the blindfold that covered her eyes.

It’s fabric having both the oozing blackness and the blood of the alicorn he just met.

Frozen, Derrick gazed up to the gorger and prayed that what just happened was simply a lie, an illusion of his mind from all the torment he endured in this cave.

But it wasn’t, and the conclusion struck a feeling he hadn’t felt since the mares back in Canterlot tried to use their magic on him.

“You…..” his expression twisted again to the old feeling.

Fury.

“ILL KILL YOU!”

An explosion of darkness, a charge to his feet and Derrick rushed the beast with his tendrils lashing wildly at the monster. Their bodies collided but the sheer strength of his magic gave the human the edge to push both him and the gorger back into the dark half of Nebula, only to have realized that the exit led high off a cliff above the kingdom.

The struggle went on and Derrick fell from said cliff with everyone’s voices silenced by the descent. Both he and the gorger fought without consideration of their situation.

The descent was quick and he fell to the ground with his magic protecting him injury or death. The gorger was unfazed as well and tossed him into a house before he could understand they landed in the village beneath the castle.

The cry of ponies in said house awakened his fury-blinded senses, and he knew how bad things had become.

“Shit.” He whispered to himself before getting snatched out of the house by his leg and thrown once more, his form crashing into another house.

The gorger was relentless and not waiting for Derrick to recover, but his magic was at his aid.

The tendrils took control and dragged his body across the ground before another blow could be felt, his body seeping with a black smoke.

He stood up and breathed heavily, exhaling said smoke as the group landed behind him with the unconscious Lilith shackled in magic. He ignored Nightmare Moon calling his name and leapt with blinding speed toward his opponent.

The gorger spat what was a piece of either Celestia’s hair, then chuckled.

Derrick saw said piece and shook violently. “You……YOU!

He saw red.

“YOU’RE GONNA PAAAYYY!”

Comprehension was gone at the sight of Derrick flying toward the gorger and landing a bone shattering punch, his roar burning in all ears.

The blow forced the gorger back but Derrick gave not one shred of time for it to recover, and rushed without a thought. He hit the beast again and again without realization that his claws had shred apart the stomach and the lifeless Celestia had already fallen out.

He didn’t see this however. He only saw what the monster and continued to break himself with each blow he thrust.

It wasn’t until the beast gasped weakly for air that he stopped, and heard the group rush at him.

He felt had taken hold of his arm once before a searing headache came.

“Derrick?” He heard her, but the pain was splitting, and he clutched his head.

He struggled to not scream.

“It hurts!”

That was all he could speak, unaware of his mother chanting at the gorger and placing what appeared to be seals. He fell to his knees with Nightmare Moon holding him tightly in her wings.

“It’s okay.” She panicked. “Let it happen.”

It made no sense to him. What did those words mean?

“She’s alive, but barely.” He heard Violent Haze speak those words, and weakly turned to the stallion to see that he stood over the alicorn.

“Celestia?”

The pain worsened at that moment before a sudden rush of relief swept over him, followed by fatigue.

He did not understand why his body betrayed him and continued to rest against his dark mare, watching the townsfolk start to gather and whisper.

“Moon?” He looked up to find said mare lying him on the ground and shushing him, his mind soothed by her voice.

“It’s okay.” She told him calmly. “Rest your body. You’ve done enough.”

Soothed to the brink of sleep, Derrick muttered for her to explain now but found his eyes had shut against will.

The fatigue had taken hold, and he fell asleep with both fear and confusion.