From the ceiling, a dull light flickered on to reveal a shabby desk littered with crumpled food wrappers, empty plastic cups, and many more various pieces of trash that were strewn about its surface. Along with the trash was a cheap, metal fan that spun its short blades in a pathetic attempt to cool off the dirty security room that it was in.
Next to this fan was a phone.
It started ringing.
Berrrrring!
Berrrrring!
Berrrr—*click*
"Hello? ...Hello! Uh... I wanted to record a message for you, to help you get settled here in your first night. Um... I actually worked in that office before you, so I know that it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you that there's nothing to worry about. You'll do fine. ...So let's just focus on getting you through your first night. Okay, lets see... the animatronic characters here do get a bit quirky at night. So just be aware, the characters do tend to ...wander a bit, they've got some kind of free-roaming mode, uh... something about their servos locking up if they get turned off for too long. They used to walk around during the day too, but then there was the 'bite of eighty-seven' ...anyways, concerning your safety, the only real risk to you, if any, is that if these characters happen to see you after hours, they'll probably won't recognize you, they'll most likely see you as a metal endoskeleton without its costume on. Now since that's against the rules, they'll probably try to forcefully stuff you into a suit. Now that wouldn't be so bad if the suit themselves weren't filled with crossbeams, wires, and animatronic devices—especially around the facial area—so you can imagine having your head forced inside one of those can cause a bit of... discomfort. But, hey! First day should be a breeze, I'll chat with you tomorrow, uh... check those cameras, and only close those doors when absolutely necessary. You've gotta conserve power. Alright, good night." *click*
The room was left silent with only the swishing sound of the spinning fan blades and the erratic flickering of the ceiling light to occupy the noiselessness of the security room. Sitting near the back wall of the room, in a rather admittedly comfy swivel chair, was a cyan and rainbow-maned pegasus by the name of Rainbow Dash.
Leaning forward on her chair, Rainbow Dash gave the now silent phone a quizzical look. A prudent question on her lips.
"...When did Equestria get phones?"
First Night
12:00 A.M.
If there's anything that Rainbow Dash has learned in her time as an Element of Harmony, it was that she, along with the rest of her friends, was very good at saving Equestria. And although her mental thesaurus wasn't quite as extensive as Twilight's, she was pretty sure that 'saving' was synonymous with 'protecting,' so, by that logic, she was absolutely certain that she would make an excellent guard for protecting smaller, less Equestria-sized places all by herself.
At least, for however long it would take for her to make enough bits to finally pay off her flight school loan, because apparently it turns out that being one of the saviors of Equestria—multiple times even!—does not give her any sort of cash rebate.
...Swell.
So here she was, working the nightshift at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza place, and completely bored out of her skull. Currently, she was slouched in her chair, a hoof propping her head up as she watched the tablet screen with a bored expression. The screen only showed one camera feed at a time and she currently had it set to the entrance of the place. In fact, the restaurant's entrance was the only camera feed that she even bothered to check at all throughout her entire time here and she had a very good reason for that.
She was guarding a cheap, family-friendly pizza restaurant for crying out loud! The only ponies that would even bother to break into this place would be stupid teenagers trying to show off in front of their friends and pretending to be cool. And since it would only be stupid teenagers that would even dare try, she'd bet money on the fact that they'd be dumb enough to attempt to break the lock on the front door and just walk straight in.
And it was such that Rainbow Dash sat there, tiredly watching the entrance camera feed, completely unaware of the movement that was going on deeper in the restaurant.
Completely unaware of the movement that was heading closer toward the lit security room.
Berrrrring! The phone rang loudly and obnoxiously, completely startling her out of her reverie with a fright. Setting down the tablet, Rainbow Dash swerved her swivel chair toward the desk and answered the phone, surprised to hear a friendly voice.
"Hello? Oh, hi Pinkie!" Rainbow Dash smiled at hearing her fun, party friend answer from the other line, "Hey, quick question, before you say anything, can you tell me ...when did we get phones?" her violet irises flickered toward the tablet in her lap, "and tablets too? Did I just miss some technological boom or something?"
In the restaurant's main dining hall, where the tables were lined up with rows of party hats atop them, a large, towering shadow, barely perceivable in the encompassing darkness, slowly trailed over the white cloth that covered these tables.
"Wow, we've had the technology for that long, huh? Knowing that probably could've made a few of our past adventures much easier to handle, y'know? Anyways, what was it that you'd call me for?"
A curved hook, too sharp to be attached to anything benign, slowly slid between the folds of two drapes and started to steadily push them apart.
"Wait, what!?" gasped Rainbow Dash, suddenly sitting up straight as her expression became incredibly fearful, "You're saying that I have a deep, personal history with this place that will slowly be revealed over the course of my stay here!?"
A jibber-jabbering of a frantic voice was heard on the other line.
"...Oh, that's not what you're telling me," said Rainbow Dash as her demeanor relaxed to much more calm state, "then what did you call for?"
In the west-end hallway that led to the security room, there was a flickering light hanging from the ceiling that, considering just how much it flickered on and off, teetered on the brink of dying. And under this dying light stood a large figure that was bipedal in shape and bulbously round in size.
"Oh, I see, you're just wondering why I'm not doing what the guy on the phone told me to do, like watching out for the animatronics," Rainbow Dash paused in her conversation, her face expressionless as she blankly stared straight ahead and silently mulled over the words that she just uttered, "...okay, first off, I'm not even going to attempt to understand how or why you're even aware of that for the sake of staying sane, and second off, c'mon Pinkie, killer animatronics?" she snorted derisively, "That's obviously just something that older employees tell newer ones to freak them out. It's like when I used to work at the rainbow factory," she smiled and nodded her head fondly as she remembered her time there, "man, I'd tell you, I had this one story that totally freaked out the school colts and fillies that came over for field trips. It was hilarious," she recalled nostalgically before briefly pausing with a far away look in her eyes as a sense of realization came to her, "actually, come to think of it, that's probably what got me fired there in the first place."
"Hur... hur... hur..."
Rainbow Dash's ears twitched at the sudden noise, it had sounded like... laughter? Did some kids break-in somehow? It sounded like it was coming from the restaurant's main dining hall.
"Hey, Pinkie, I'm going to have to call you back ...somehow—I'll figure it out later—I've gotta check something," hanging up the phone, Rainbow Dash reopened her tablet and flicked through the camera feeds, before pausing at a specific one.
The dining hall's stage...
It was empty.
Clump! Clump!
Rainbow Dash sprung her head up at the noise of quick, heavy footsteps sounding off to her left. Turning her gaze toward the west entrance of the room, she silently stared into the black darkness with aweing trepidation.
...No.
It couldn't be... could it?
Her eyes flicked over to the two buttons placed on the side of the entrance, particularly focusing on the white button that would activate the hallway lights.
Switching her gaze back to the shadowy darkness, she slowly moved her cyan hoof over the button.
Hesitating for but a second, she pressed her hoof down against it, activating the lights and allowing her to see into the hallway.
And there stood Bonnie the Bunny, one of the animatronic animals used to entertain the children who came to the restaurant, standing no more than a few feet away from Dash. What once seemed so friendly and innocent in the light, now seemed terrifying and demonic in the darkness. It's marshmallow shaped teeth looked predatory and the corners of its mouth appeared to be stained with some sort of mucus and... and blood! Yes, dear Celestia, that looked like blood! What was worse though were its eyes! How it stared back at Dash with blank, cartoonish eyes. Not real eyes, but fake eyes! It had fake eyes, fake teeth, a fake nose, a fake face, and fake skin! Everything about it seemed so fake and wrong, like its appearance was nothing more than a flimsy, haunting disguise used to cover up something that was just so much more terrifying underneath that it could barely be contained by such a cartoonish get up, creating a walking morbid horror!
And Rainbow Dash stared straight at it, frozen still.
Then her wings flared open.
"Nope!" she said with absolute clarity.
And suddenly she was a rainbow that flew out of the east entrance of the security room, flying away from the animatronic monster so fast that her backdraft caused its bowtie to twirl from the burst of wind.
"Nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope!" she repeatedly yelled in fright as she flew down the east hallway at such a speed that she barely noticed the yellow figure that she passed by, its 'let's eat' bib flying off of it from the sudden passing.
"Nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-nope!" Rainbow Dash continued to chant this mantra as she flew over the dining hall's tables and past the drapes of the pirate cove stage, not even noticing the curved hook that barely missed striking her abdomen to only slide through the hair strands of her tail.
"Nope-nope-nope-nope-nope-YES!" she screamed out joyously as she reached the entrance of the restaurant. Placing her hooves against the glass double-doors, Rainbow Dash gave them a push with all of her might.
Only for them to not move an inch...
Because they were locked...
And Rainbow Dash just remembered that she left the keys in the security room.
"Hur... Hur... Hur..."
Eyes went wide, brows shot up, and pupils shrank to tiny pinpricks as she heard the noise. That laughter sounded very close.
Like, the 'right behind her' kind of close...
CRASH!
"FREEDOM!" shouted Rainbow Dash as she burst through the glass of the double-doors, the shattered shards falling to the ground as she flew away into the distance.
...Except she wasn't flying off into the distance. In fact, to her, it seemed like she was flying in place right in front of the entrance, no matter how hard she flapped her wings.
Perhaps it had something to do with the hard tugging feeling on her tail.
Snapping her head back around in mid-air, Rainbow Dash nearly cried in fearful distraught at what she saw. There was a brown, metal paw wrapped around her rainbow colored tail, and the limb of this paw was stretching out from the darkness of the restaurant much like a tendril of a cosmic horror would do from a shadowy realm.
Suddenly, a face lit up from the darkness of the restaurant. It had two large, glowing eyes and a bright, open maw that procured enough light for her to see a cartoonish, bear face with a bowler hat atop of its head.
It was Freddy Fazbear, the centerpiece of the animatronic quartet and the mascot of the restaurant.
And it was pulling her back into said restaurant.
"Hur... Hur... Hur..." it laughed its disturbing laugh as it soullessly stared unblinkingly at the animatronic endoskeleton it had found. It was against the rules for one to be without its suit.
It needed to fix that.
Pulled half-way back inside of the restaurant again, Rainbow Dash found herself furiously flapping her wings with all of her might and desperately clinging to the edges of the shattered doors with her hooves. Holding herself against the doors, the broken pieces of glass still attached to the insides of the window's ridges pierced into her, their sharp edges cutting into her skin and allowing red blood to trail down both her cyan coat and the glass.
But she didn't pay the pain any mind as she concentrated solely on surviving.
"So... much...—AUGH!" screamed out Rainbow Dash as a second metal paw grabbed her face and pulled her fully into the restaurant. Her form disappearing into its shadowy interior, its encompassing darkness swallowing her whole.
But then, the restaurant's interior exploded with color, completely shattering the remaining glass windows as a streak of rainbow shot out from the front entrance.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPE!" the rainbow shouted as it escaped the restaurant's confines and flew off into the distance, a severed metal paw still attached to the rainbow's tail.
Second Night
12:00 A.M.
Buck That!
BREAKING NEWS!
FREDDY FAZBEAR'S PIZZA DESTROYED BY ROYAL ORDER!
In one of the most unusual first decrees of a newly formed government body, Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, a beloved family restaurant loved by many and the source of much conspiracy surrounding the cases of missing children and security guards alike, has been destroyed by order of the Council of Friendship, led by Princess Twilight Sparkle.
This controversial decision was initiated by Rainbow Dash, Element of Loyalty, winner of Best Young Flyer's competition, and council seat member. After taking a second job (or third if one counted a seat on the council as a job, which, according to a recent poll, most ponies don't) as a night watch guard at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, Rainbow Dash was reportedly seen flying screaming out of the restaurant shortly after her first posting, breaking several windows and damaging other such pieces of private property as a result.
The actual destruction of the restaurant was carried out by the very council members themselves, who had arrived at the restaurant's location early in the morning, cleared out any patrons and workers inside of it, before using their 'friendship-rainbow powers' to create a beam of magical energy to obliterate the family restaurant.
Suspicions regarding Rainbow Dash's sanity were put into question when concerned ponies reported that said council seat member was seen at the site, still in her 'rainbow-powered' form, frantically jumping up and down on the rubble and screaming, "FRIENDSHIP-BEAM IT TO THE GROUND!"
Author's Note
Rainbow Dash's reaction is an accurate depiction of how I would react if I ever decided to play Five Nights at Freddy's. Seriously, first time I saw the game I could barely get through watching a PewDiePie Let's Play video for crying out loud!
Anyways, this little fic was just something I wanted to do after writing a 14,000 worded epic. It was a nice, fun little short and I'm glad I did it. That said, I treated this more as an impulse thing than anything else I've done, so please excuse me if you find any grammatical or spelling mistakes that I callously missed.
Also, I seem to have impeccable timing as the teaser trailer for the Five Night's at Freddy's sequel just came out.
Happy Halloween!
This Chapter Is Also A Humorous Take On The Concept, Except This Time It's On The Sequel—Er... Prequel.
Second chapter thanks to popular demand! ...I guess?
First Night
5:00 A.M.
The light was flickering.
From the ceiling, a light bulb hanged aesthetically in the security room, brightening up its contents to reveal dirty floors, a shoddy desk, and a cheap fan that was placed upon the desk. While not the most beautiful of settings to be revealed in the light, the bulb still did its job admirably as it continued to provide a reliable light-source.
Except now.
In abjection to the prior statement, the room's lighting now flickered spasmodically between a state of light and darkness. The reason for this stray from reliability was a simple one.
Something wrong had entered the room.
And Pinkiemena Diane Pie stared in abject horror from behind her Freddy Fazbear mask as a long shadow passed over her form. Frozen from fear, her breathing stilled to nothing as she held it in as long as she could; to be as quiet as she was capable of, so that it wouldn't notice her anymore than it already had.
The flickering light stopped, and, for a brief moment, darkness took over.
When the light returned, Pinkie found herself alone in the security room.
Taking off the mask, she let out a sigh of relief, thankful that that thing had left her alone. Checking down the long hallway in front of her with her flashlight, she became even more relieved when she saw nothing. Lighting up the two vents she was sandwiched between revealed nothing either; no mechanical monstrosity in sight.
For a second, Pinkie thought that she had this job in the bag.
That was before she heard the faint jingling tune.
Sitting up straight stiff, her pupils shrunk in horror as her ears twitched at the jovial tune that, at any other time in her life, would have brought a smile to her face.
"...No," she whimpered, before bringing up the tablet and tapping at the button that connected with the wind up box in a frantic manner, "no-no-no, please no," she said with each tap of her pink hoof, praying that it would silence the music box.
But no silence came, and the music only seemed to increase in volume despite her attempts.
In a fit, Pinkie threw the tablet across the room and curled herself into a ball, her hooves against her ears as she fruitlessly tried to block out the unbearable music that seemed to bounce around in her skull. Tears streamed down her face as she trembled uncontrollably in her seat.
She didn't want to die. She didn't want to die!
It wasn't fair! She was only just barely entering marehood, ready to enjoy the joys of finally being an adult, and now she was going to die. All because she took this stupid summer job.
The music sounded louder; closer.
And Pinkie did the only thing she could think of to do.
"G-Giggle at the ghostie... Giggle at the ghostie!" she choked out between her crying, singing out the song her grandmother taught her for the last remaining comfort that she was ever going to have. She then closed her eyes tight and waited for the painful inevitable.
...
...DING! ...DONG!
Pinkie's tear-strained eyes opened wide at the sound of the loud bell.
6:00 A.M.
She couldn't believe it. She made it! She survived the first night!
Pinkie's happy smile stretched as wide as wide could be, immensely relieved that she was going to continue on living.
Now all she had to do was go through four more nights at Freddy's.
Her smile faltered.
Second Night
11:50 P.M.
As the night guard for Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria, Pinkie was supposed to be in the security room, getting ready for her shift.
But she wasn't, instead she stood in front of the stage show, staring up at the trio of animatronics that occupied it. Turning on the flashlight she had wrapped up in her cotton-candy mane, Pinkie Pie gave them a quick once over before turning away from them as an involuntary shiver ran up her back; memories of the previous night assailing her. Knowing that it was only a few more minutes before the animatronics reactivated, Pinkie quickly set out to do what she was going to do.
"Hello!" she called out, her voice echoing across the rooms of the restaurant, "I'm the night guard and my shift is about to start! Is there anyone still left in the building!?"
Silence answered her.
Pinkie wore a bright grin, "Well, okie-dokie then," she said to herself, before then happily skipping to her intended destination.
SLAM!
Pinkie Pie slammed the door of the restaurant's front entrance closed behind her as she exited the building, before pulling out her security-issued key and locking it.
"Great!" she proclaimed loudly in the night air, "Now that I've got the restaurant super-secured, I'll just patrol around the building all guardy-like. This makes my job much-much-much-much easier, 'cause now I'm actually able to concentrate on keeping this place safe and secure like I'm supposed to do, instead of just focusing on my survival."
With that, Pinkie Pie began to whistle as she started her patrol around the restaurant's perimeter.
Tap-tap!
Pinkie stopped.
She stopped when she heard the distinct noise of what sounded like a metal hook lightly tapping against glass.
Tap-tap!
Not turning around, Pinkie opted to ignore the sound and continue on with her patrol.
Third Night
2:00 A.M.
"Hey c'mon, hurry up. I want to get this over with."
"Don't rush me, dude. I've only got a couple of these lockpicks to spare."
"Lockpicks? Please, I seriously doubt your sister calls her hairpin a lockpick."
"Sh-shutup!"
"STOP RIGHT THERE, CRIMINAL SCUM!" shouted Pinkie Pie as she shone her flashlight on the two nefarious youngsters in front of the restaurant's entrance. The two colts, one a unicorn and the other an earth pony, were attempting to unlawfully enter the premises of her employers' property and Pinkie wouldn't be doing her duty as a night guard if she didn't apprehend them posthaste.
"Oh buck! It's the security guard!" shouted the earth pony.
"I thought you said that this place didn't have a guard anymore?" asked the unicorn, the hairpins dropping away from the door's lock as his magic stopped.
"I only heard it from a rumor, dude," said the earth pony before looking back at Pinkie in desperation, "please don't send us to jail or call our parents, Mrs. security guard. We weren't really breaking in, it was just a dare, honest."
"Wow, way to wuss out, dude," snarked the unicorn.
Pinkie Pie let out a big, long gasp as her eyes grew wide, "Somepony actually dared you to break into Freddy's Pizzeria!?" she asked, her tone full of shock, "Don't you colts know that this place is haunted at night by the murdered foals that take control of the animatronics!?"
The two colts exchanged looks, before the unicorn spoke up with an indignant tone, "Okay, you caught us, fine. But you don't have to insult our intelligence by making up some story to scare us into never trying to break in aga—"
Pinkie raised her flashlight up to the glass doors of the restaurant's entrance, lighting up the interior and allowing everypony to better see what was on the other side of the doors.
And on the other side stood Bonnie the Bunny.
The old one, not the new one.
Standing there like a decrepit zombie of metal and wires, its fake fur costume had become moldy and torn over the years of disuse, hanging from the animatronic's figure like that of decaying flesh. One of its arms looked to have also been torn off, exposing fleshy wires and metal bones that hung from its open limb. What was worse though about this patchwork of a machine was its face.
Like how it didn't have one.
Instead of the cartoony face of a bunny that it was meant to have, all that was left was the exposed cranium of its endoskeleton. Faceless, it's inner, metal jaw created a sense of wrongness when seen behind the fabricated marshmallow teeth of the first one. Where there once was supposed to be large, cartoonish eyes, there was now only two glowing, red dots that were more suited for a demon-possessed monstrosity than for anything that was actually intended to be kid-friendly.
Bonnie the Bunny stood there, just a couple feet away from the trio of ponies, with only the glass door and the rule against breaking Freddy Fazbear Pizzeria property embedded in what was left of its mainframe between them.
"AAAUUUUUGH!" screamed the two colts, zipping past Pinkie Pie as they ran away from the mechanical nightmare. Pinkie Pie calmly watched them go, assured that there wouldn't be anymore trouble from them tonight. Turning back to Bonnie, Pinkie flinched nervously as the terrifying machine continued to stare at her hollowly.
A purple paw was placed on the door's glass.
Pinkie decided to check if the back of the restaurant was still secure.
Fourth Night
3:00 A.M.
Pinkie Pie threw another doughnut into her mouth, chewing the delicious morsel with glee as she cheerfully skipped down the street with a box full of donuts bouncing on her back. She had, after much thought on the matter, decided to take a quick trip down to the Sugarcube Corner bakery to order some donuts for a late-night snack. Great place Sugarcube Corner, the couple there were really nice too, maybe Pinkie should ask them for a job position there some time.
Turning the corner onto the street that Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria was located on, Pinkie Pie froze in mid-step.
There, at the entrance of the restaurant, was a pegasus in a dark hoody. A stallion, the pegasus had a deadly knife gripped between his teeth that he wedged in between the two glass doors.
Seeing this, Pinkie Pie gulped down her doughnut nervously, this wasn't some delinquent colt breaking into the restaurant on a stupid dare. This was some dangerous hoodlum who might just be entirely willing to get violent with anypony that got in the way of his break-in. Luckily, as Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria's night guard, Pinkie knew exactly what any underpaid security guard was supposed to do in this situation.
Slowly, Pinkie Pie quietly walked backwards to hide behind one of the street's buildings, only letting her head peak out a couple of inches so as to continue watching the trespasser. Finally, after a few more minutes of the hoodlum tinkering away, he managed to part the doors open and proceed inside, closing the doors behind him.
Seeing her chance, Pinkie got out from behind the building she was hiding behind and calmly walked over to the restaurant's entrance. She then took out her key and, after checking to make sure the mechanism still worked properly, proceeded to lock the doors.
Glad that she made sure the animatronics wouldn't get out after they were done with the criminal, Pinkie took a large bite out of another doughnut.
BAM! BAM!
Pinkie Pie looked up from her doughnut to find the pegasus hoodlum banging against the glass doors with a horrified look on his face.
"Let me out! Dear sweet Celestia, please let me out!" he screamed, his tone filled with terror.
Before Pinkie could even make an attempt to do anything, long and thin, black arms wrapped around the trespasser's body, and Pinkie could just barely make out the smiling, white face that appeared behind the stallion's own before he was immediately pulled back into the restaurant's consuming darkness. His soul-piercing wailing the only part of him to make it out of the restaurant's shadows, before even that too was soon quelled by a distant, sickening crunch.
For a long moment, Pinkie stood frozen still as she stared into the restaurant's ichor-like darkness, before slowly walking away and dumping her box of donuts into a nearby trashcan; her hunger gone as her stomach churned uncomfortably from what she knew just happened.
"I am so gonna repress the hay out of my memories here," she muttered to herself with a small whimper.
Fifth Night
6:00 A.M.
"Well, I'll be..." muttered the manager of Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria as he stared at the smiling, pink pony, "I didn't think that you'd be able do it. Most night guards quit halfway through the week most of the time for some reason. But you've managed to make it through the entire week. Congratulations!"
"Thanks," said Pinkie, not breaking her grin, "can I have my reward now?"
"Sure thing," he replied, "I've got your check right here." Just as he was about to fish out said check, he stopped when he noticed the look Pinkie was giving him.
With a deadly serious stare, she said, "You know that that wasn't part of the deal we made."
"Ugh, fine," he groaned out, before pulling out a colorful card with a picture of Freddy Fazbear's face plastered on it, "one unlimited access pass to Freddy Fazbear's confetti storage room."
"Yippee!" shouted Pinkie Pie as she threw her hooves up in celebration as an explosion of confetti sounded off behind her as if to magically match her joy.
Author's Note
And that's how Pinkie Pie never ran out of confetti again. The end.
It's also how Pinkie knew about the killer animatronics in the previous chapter. And you guys thought that she was just all-knowing. Hah!
So anyways... why does Freddy's even need a security guard at night? Say like, in the game, there's this part where some criminals break into the restaurant. What do you do? What can you do? I tell you what you do, you sit on your ass and watch as the animatronics mangle their bodies as they forcibly stuff them into suits! I mean, I sure as heck ain't gonna take the chance to stop the criminals when there are killer animatronics on the loose. Seems to me that the killer animatronics are doing a better job anyways. So I say, just keep the night guard outside to stop any stupid kids from breaking in, but if any dangerous criminals try, let'em.
Also, for those who were looking forward to the third main installment of the Tutelary Spirit universe, do not worry. I am working on it, but not tirelessly, tirelessly starts after Finals week is done. This was just something quick and easy, barely only took me a day to do.
And finally, for you Five Nights at Freddy's fans, here's this video:
...I found it hilarious.
