The battle for the key. Gizoogle-ized

-----------Ark Royal----------

"Attention captain." I awoke ta ACCS callin me outta slumber n' shit. I groaned n' rolled over,tryin ta block up tha computas voice. When dat freaky freaky biatch hadn't called mah crazy ass fo' five minuets I smiled thankin dat I had won, when tha klaxons fuckin started blarin at full volume causin me ta jump n' fall outta tha chair I had fallen asleep in.

"OK i'm up." I shouted as I pulled mah dirty ass up off of tha floor."What tha fuck iz it?" I axed as I dusted mah dirty ass off, Not dat I needed too I just done did it fo' show.

"Da Ark Royal is now up in a high orbit, just like you requested." I sighed as I shook mah head.

"Thanks fo' informin me ACCS but did you straight-up need ta wake me up fo' that?" I axed as I stood up in front of tha view screen, starin up all up in tha chronic n' blue hood brangin back flashez of familiarity.

"No sir." ACCS replied pullin me back outta mah thoughts, n' you can put dat on yo' toast. "But tha captain of tha nanite repair crew wishes ta drop a rhyme ta yo thugged-out ass." Yo ass looked round puzzled before dissin her muthafuckin ass.

"I thought dat tha nanites was microscopic?"

"They is sir" Biatch holla'd as a thugged-out door near tha back of tha room opened n' a swarm of liquid like robots fell tha fuck in. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I hopped up onto ta tha chair ta avoid gettin any of dem on mah dirty ass. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Suddenly they fuckin started ta gather n' take a gangbangin' form. I peeped on up in fascination as they took on a human form. When tha nanites had stopped they was up in tha form of what tha fuck rocked up ta  be a biatch up in her early twenties, dat freaky freaky biatch had shoulder length brown afro n' magenta eyes. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch was bustin a orange jumpsuit wit phat brown boots n' white gloves.

"So you tha knew captain?" Biatch axed mah crazy ass whilst glarin directly tha fuck into mah eyes, makin me feel straight-up hella uncomfortable."Yo kid I axed you a question." Biatch holla'd forcefully. I could only nod as she rolled her eyes. "Yo ACCS Is he a mute or something?" Then ACCS replied up in a tone I had never heard from her before.

"No he aint Nancy yo, but it would probably help if you gots outta his wild lil' grill n' let his ass speak." ACCS holla'd wit a almost growl like tone up in her voice.

"Ok ACCS def ya' self." Biatch then turned ta glare all up in mah grill again n' again n' again although not as straight fuckin as before. "So captain, as you probably just heard mah names Nancy, well it is when our asses lot is up in dis form fo' realz. Any way i'm yo' chizzle engineer now cuz of dat oldschool wind ounce ta tha bounce of a human bein incinerated." Biatch stopped bustin lyrics ta reach tha fuck into her pocket n' pulled up a gangbangin' finger-lickin' dirty-ass shizzle of paper n' handed it ta mah dirty ass.

"Whilst ACCS was haulin our asses over ta dis hood me n' mah crew took tha liberty ta fix tha Ark Royal up ta 100% efficiency." Biatch holla'd whilst holdin a smug look on her face. I stared all up in tha shizzle up in mah hand ta peep a thugged-out damage report.

I looked it over ta peep dat biiiiatch was right bout tha fixed up ship.

"Well done Nancy." I holla'd handin her back tha paper n' shit.

"No problem cap'." her big-ass booty holla'd as da hoe fuckin started ta dissolve back tha fuck into tha swarm. "See ya." Biatch holla'd as tha swarm melted tha fuck into tha deck n' dispersed.

"Is there anythang else ACCS?" I asked.

"No captain, you can go back ta chill." Biatch holla'd n' tha lights lowered leavin tha room bathed up in tha light bein reflected from tha hoodz surface. I yawned n' lent back up in tha chair again.

" 'Night ACCS." I holla'd as I fell tha fuck asleep once again.

---------Canterlot--------

Supa-Hoe Celestia was chillin on her throne wit a smile on her grill as she listened ta tha light red earth pony stallion whoz ass stood up in front of her n' shiznit yo. Dude was askin if it would be possible ta git tha muthafuckin rights ta push his wild lil' freakadelic loot up in Canterlot as dat shiznit was da most thugged-out likely place ta want fresh ingredients cuz of tha noblez ficklenizz wit tha freshnizz n' qualitizzle of they chicken n' you know I be eatin up dat shizzle all muthafuckin day, biatch.

Da stallion had just finished his thugged-out lil' petizzle when a letta from her hustla rocked up in a gangbangin' flash of smoke next ta her head.

"I be sorry as a muthafucka everypony but I be goin ta gotta cut dis session short." As Celestia turned ta strutt up tha room dat freaky freaky biatch heard tha sadnizz filled voice of tha stallion.

"I KNOW bizzatch fuck you fo' yo' time." Dude turned ta strutt outta tha room until Celestia called his ass back.

"Red Autumn." her big-ass booty holla'd causin tha rusty stallion ta turn around.

"Yes yes y'all, bizzatch?" Dude axed wit hope up in his fuckin lil' dark brown eyes. Da Supa-Hoe smiled.

"Yo ass have mah permission ta push yo' crewz loot on tha main street of Canterlot." tha stallionz grill hung open before da perved-out muthafucka stammered up his fuckin lyrics of props.

"Nuff props so much yo' highness." Dude holla'd bowin so low his fuckin lil' dusty brown mane brushed tha floor.

"Dat shiznit was nothing." Said Celestia wit a smile. "Now if yo big-ass booty is ghon excuse me I be goin ta retire ta mah private chambers."

Red Autumn nodded again n' again n' again still thankin tha bizzatch fo' her generosity.

Da bizzatch entered her room greetin tha guardz wit tha formalitizzle dat was expected of her up in dis biatch.

As soon as her doors was closed she removed her regalia n' put it on her bedside table before floppin onto tha bed n' rollin onto her side. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch sighed n' closed her eyes, Dat shiznit was a rare occasion dat dat thugged-out biiiatch called off tha dizzle court early but when her dope ass did she always savored tha lil bit of free time dat freaky freaky biatch had. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Biatch was bout ta doze off when she remembered tha letta from her hustla. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch looked all up in tha letta again n' again n' again n' saw dat it had a purple seal on dat shit. Celestia sat up when she remembered dat Twilight only used dat color when dat shiznit was a emrgancy dat thugged-out biiiatch cracked open tha seal ta read what tha fuck could be all kindsa blingin.

Dear Supa-Hoe Celestia

At round 01:30 dis mornin me n' mah playaz was watchin tha meteor shower dat you sista had put on when I decided ta set up mah telescope. Unfortunately I could not git a phat view so I used mah magic ta expand tha lens ta git a funky-ass betta view when Pinkie mad mah crazy ass jump accidentally puttin ta much juice tha fuck into tha lens.

Afta dat I looked all up in it when I saw suttin' strange. Well shiiiit, it rocked up ta be a gangbangin' finger-lickin' dirty-ass shizzle of some sort bein pursued by another, I followed dem fo' bout 20 minuets n' lost sight of dem afta they went behind tha moon, however I did peep a gangbangin' flash of light afterwards.

I continued ta search dis mornin ta peep if I could catch a sight of either of dem but could only find tha original gangsta one. I peeped it approach tha hood but stop at a high orbit just over tha area between Canterlot n' Ponyville.

If you or Luna know anythang bout dis vessel could you please let me know.

Thank yo thugged-out ass.

Yo crazy-ass Supa-Hoe up in arms.

Twilight Sparkle.

Celestia rolled up tha scroll n' stared outta her window, which over looked Ponyville, n' stared up ta tha sky.

one of tha nuff perkz of bein a alicorn dat Celestia was horny bout was bein able ta peep much further than anypony else.

Afta half a minute of searchin Biatch spotted a grey speck up in tha sky. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch concentrated on it tryin ta peep it even clearer.

When dat freaky freaky biatch had  bigged up  dis dat thugged-out biiiatch could peep a grey-ish shizzle like vessel hangin upside down up in tha sky.

Bitch stopped smilin n' fuckin started frowning.Bitch turned n' galloped outta tha room desperate ta find her sista n' shiznit fo' realz. Afta 10 minuetz of hustlin across tha massive castle she ran straight tha fuck into tha navy blue alicorn.

"Luna!" Exclaimed Celestia. "I be soopa-doopa sorry I didn't expect you ta be awake."

"It aint nuthin but fine 'Tia." Said Luna bobbin her head n' pullin her muthafuckin ass off of tha ground, hissin up in pain while her dope ass did so.

"It can't be if yo' up in pain afta dat fall." Luna chuckled n' shook her head.

"It aint nuthin but not cuz of tha fall." Said Luna as her dope ass pimped up her sisterz eyes ta her bandaged torso. Celestia Looked at her sista up in worry.

"How tha fuck did dat happen Luna?" axed tha olda alicorn, worry lacin her voice.

"Well you peep when a asterizzle hits tha moon it gets damaged, therefore mah natural affinitizzle wit tha moon means it scalez down tha damage ta mah size yo. However suttin' big-ass hit it earlier on causin a massive scrape on mah side dat has yet ta heal." Biatch holla'd. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Suddenly Celestiaz eyes widened as she realized something.

'Wait, two shizzle go behind tha moon only one comes back round n' dis mornin mah sister, whoz ass gets hurt every last muthafuckin time tha moon gets damaged is hurt. Thatz where tha other shizzle is!"

Celestia grabbed Luna up in her magical grasp n' picked her up before dartin back towardz her room.

"Tia, where is you takin me son?" Shouted tha younger alicorn whoz ass was strugglin up in her sisterz grasp.

"Too mah room." Celestia shouted back. "Yo ass gotta peep something."

Celestia burst tha fuck into her room, blastin past he guardz whoz ass didn't even bat a eyelid. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Biatch shoved her sista onto tha balcony n' pimped up her gaze ta tha still present starship.

"Yo ass betta peep that?" she axed he younger sista n' shit. Luna shook her head up in disbelief.

"What tha fuck iz it?" she axed when she looked all up in tha alabasta mare again. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Celestia picked up Twilightz letta n' offered it ta her sister.

"Read all dis bullshit." Biatch stated simply. Celestia gauged Lunaz erection as she read tha letter n' shit. when she finished she looked at her sister.

"A starship?" she axed n' Celestia replied wit a nod.

"what is we goin ta do?" Luna axed afta nuff muthafuckin long momentz of silence.

"Perhaps we should call tha UNE together." Luna was silent as dat thugged-out biiiatch considered her sistas opinion.

"That is probably a phat idea." holla'd Luna wit a Nod. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!

"I be bout ta bust a letta ta tha members." Said Celestia pullin up a quill n' parchment.

"Git tha fuck outta ma bidnizz then sister, i'm off ta bed." Said Luna as dat biiiiatch strutted outta tha door.

"Ok." Celestia replied, already too busy preparin a letta fo' tha thugz of tha United Nationz of Equis.