Of the Sun and Moon

Alone.

That was how Luna spent every night now. Alone with naught but the darkness to surround her and the silence to speak to her. The moon and stars watched over her but they were so distant. Always watching and nothing more. The night was so cold and empty and Luna sat as a ruler of nothing.

She looked around the throne room of the castle she and Celestia had built. The surrounding grey of the stone made the room so dull at night. And the use of stone made it cold and emotionless. The tapestries that draped from the walls and ceilings showed the distance that had formed between her and her sister. Those for Luna on one side and those for Celestia on the other. Division. Even her sister’s throne was empty and abandoned. Once, she loved this castle. Now, she hated it. And she was steadily starting to hate more.

Luna descended from her throne to begin wandering the castle, hoping to ease her mind. Yet each turn, each hall, each room, was as empty as the last. All of the trap doors and secret passageways and other silly designs were that of a filly’s mind. The simple gags to liven up the life of being a princess only served to show her what a fool she had been. The sisters had wanted to be guardians of the land, not the rulers. They wanted friends, not subjects. But time had changed all of that.

So much had changed in their lives and the inhabitants had regarded the sisters more as rulers now than ever before. With each new change, the isolation grew. No friends to ease her loneliness. The ponies raising them up higher and higher, and away from them. Her sister becoming more distant as the duties of being princess called for more attention. And the ever present isolation at night as all but Luna slept under the watchful eyes of the moon.

Each thought reminded her of the growing isolation and tore at her heart. She could feel the void that hung in the hole of her heart. It drained her joy, making her feel as cold as the stone that surrounded her. All she was left with was her frustration and anger. She thought back to the days of her fillyhood. The days when she and Celestia played and laughed together. She held on to those memories, unwilling to let the void claim them and leave her with nothing. Could such days ever return?

Luna found herself at the entrance to the castle and turned to look back at the structure. It was like her. A shell, decorated for appearance but empty within. Within, her sister slept. Like the hopes and desires of Luna’s heart to one day stand by her sister’s side and smile and laugh together again. She squinted her eyes shut as a cold tear dripped down her face.

“Please do not take my sister away from me.”

She turned to the night and felt her hooves dig into the ground a bit as she kicked off and took flight. Each night held the same ritual now. Examine the hollow shell of her home, the analogy of her heart that became emptier each night. Seek something new, only to find it as empty as the night before. Wander the kingdom and the empty lands of the night, all in a vain attempt to flee the nightly reminder of the hole in her heart. Finally, return to watch the day fill with life and push her into a corner as a shadow. She watches the light, tries to reach out to it. Yet, like the shadow, is vanquished and overwhelmed by the light. They all see the light and revel in it only to ignore and fear the shadow in the corner.

Luna soared over the villages and towns of the land to find them as empty as the castle in which she resided. Hollow shells and lies. In the day, they were alive as they reveled in the light of the sun. At night, the ponies hid away from the dark, ignoring the soft light of the moon. She caught herself gritting her teeth at the thought. Why do they ignore and fear her?

She descended and landed in the middle of a small village and wandered the empty streets. The homes were as she had seen each night. Dark and silent. But a small light from the window of one home caught her eye. She looked and saw a small filly gently open the window and peered out into the night with a groggy expression. Luna smiled softly at the filly who smiled back. Yet her world was shattered once more as the filly’s mother pulled her in and closed the window before putting out the light. The look on the mother’s face show everything Luna feared.

Luna heard the mother scolding the little one in a harsh whisper then soft hoof steps before the silence returned. For Luna, the look from the mother was still seared into her vision. Fear, dread, hatred. She saw it all. Why? Why do the ponies look upon her in such a way? What is it that makes her so frightening? No answer came. Perhaps she could ask Celestia once more. Or would she ignore her as she had lately?

Luna silently took off and made her way back to the castle, still feeling the sting from the mare’s eyes. Her jaw clenched once more as her teeth started to grind. She felt the tears build again in her eyes and felt them burn and chill as they dripped. The ground rushed beneath her as she flew faster. Her mind raced and her emotions became whipped up in another storm within. Why did it hurt so much?
What was wrong with her?

The balcony she regularly perched on rushed towards her and she struck the stone with a thud. A ring and screech sounded as her silver horseshoes struck and slid across the stone. She felt a sharp sting spike up her legs from her ankles as she skidded to a halt just before slamming into the door to the inside. She stood at the door for several minutes trying to calm down. Her heart pounded inside her chest and her breathing was quick and sharp. Her legs shook from the pain of the landing and her body shook between bouts of tension as her muscles seized and relaxed.
What was wrong with her?

Exhaustion overwhelmed her and she leaned against the door to keep from falling to the floor. She tried to calm herself but the storm of emotions ravaged her all the more. Her breathing became more erratic, threatening to cause her to hyperventilate. Her heart beat faster, forcing adrenaline throughout her body and exasperating the other effects to her body. Her mind swarmed with the images of the looks that ponies gave her and the stories that they had begun to tell each other and their children about her. Their fear and hatred of her only fueled her own fear and hatred.

What was wrong with her?

As her emotions ravaged her mind, her heart felt like it was being torn asunder. The hole in her heart grew and tore at her soul. She blinked away another flood of tears and stared up at the silver moon in the sky. The moon had so many companions in the night sky despite being so different from those stars that surrounded it. Yet Luna stood alone. No stars to surround her and ease her pain or wash it away. Her world went dark as she shut her eyes and bowed her head. She stamped her hoof and began to scream into the night.

What was wrong with her?

Luna gave in to the torment and fell to the floor. Tears streamed down her face and she continued to scream in her anguish. The hole in her heart began to tear wider, feeling as though it was ripping open her chest. She tore at her mind in vain to understand what reason she seemed fearful or ignored. Certainly she could not simply be misunderstanding so much. So many fearful and hateful looks. So many hurtful things they said about her. Could they not see the isolation she endured? Could they not see that all that they did stuck her as much as a physical blow?

Finally, her screams fell silent as her voice began to fade. She laid on the floor another minute before rising and wiping away her tears. She held the rail of the balcony to steady herself and waited. It was nearly time to change to the day and she could not let her sister see her in such a state. She needed to speak to Celestia once more regarding the ponies and how they viewed the night princess.

Her body shuddered violently for a split second as a loud creak sounded from behind her. She turned to see a groggy Celestia pass through the doorway as she shut the door behind her. The elder sister stared at Luna in confusion at her state of shock.

“S-Sister,” Luna said, trying to maintain a veiled calm. “You have awakened.”

“Yes,” Celestia said with a yawn. “Today shall be a very busy day. So much to do.”

The sisters began the process of changing the night to day as Luna mustered the courage to speak to her sister.

“Sister…I wish to speak with you about something.”

“Luna, I can’t right now. There is so much to do and I cannot afford to be behind schedule.”

“Sister please!” Luna stomped the floor as she spoke. The two stood for a moment as Luna withdrew in regret from her outburst. “Forgive me. But I must speak with you now while there is time.”

“Luna, I’m afraid there is no time. Perhaps later.” Celestia gave a smile, one that veiled the frustration she truly felt. “You are tired. Please go rest up and we will speak later.” Celestia turned and spread her wings.
“But-” Luna began, stopping Celestia for but a moment.

“Later Luna.”

“I love you,” Luna said, relenting and wishing to hear her sister recite their age old ritual of parting.

But she stood alone on the balcony as her sister had already taken flight.