“Did you do anything fun tonight?” a tired bat pony mare asked the hyperactive young colt bouncing around and between her legs. Stardust was graced with an energy that she certainly couldn’t remember having when she was his age. With every flap and flutter of his wings, he seemed to be all over the place; absolutely unable to sit still. He was a darling colt, his tannish-grey coat perfectly setting off his lavender-pink mane.
Oh, what she wouldn’t give to have half his energy now.
But no, Moonshine was nearly dead on her hooves as she trudged back to their home in one of the smaller trees on the edges of Hollow Shades. It was nearing three in the morning, and so in a few short hours it would be time for little bats to be getting to bed. And it would be time for her to try desperately to get some sleep by the guttering flame of her lantern.
She shook her head to clear the thoughts, likely further messing up her untidy grey mane and causing her lantern to creak on its rusty hinge. The sound echoed loudly in the silence of night around them, broken further only by the chirping of crickets and the occasional hooting of an owl out hunting.
Oh, and the constant chattering of her teeth against the lantern’s handle. That was certainly loud enough to wake the dead. She hugged her leathery wings a little closer to her sides, despite the relatively pleasant temperature of the night air. It was only as he jumped directly in front of her face that she realized her son was talking.
“…and Chrysanthemum said that he was cheating even though he really wasn’t! It’s not his fault that he can hold the cards better with his wings than his hooves!” he said, indignant. Having missed most of his story, she wasn’t exactly sure what had happened, though this was far from the first time that Chrysanthemum had caused problems. Moonshine wouldn’t ever say it aloud, but she thought that filly could be quite the brat.
“Well, that doesn’t sound very nice at all,” she said, trying to be vague. Maybe he wouldn’t notice her slip up. “What did Mr. Waltz say about that?”
“He just said to play nice or he’d take the cards away!” he groused. Moonshine thanked her lucky stars he seemed to have bought it as he continued. “I’m tired of going to Night-Care. Only babies have to go to Night-Care! Can’t I stay home alone after school? All my friends do!”
She shivered. And not from the cold.
“Maybe in a few more years you can, Little Star. I just wouldn’t feel comfortable leaving you home alone. What if something were to happen?” she said.
“Please, Mom?!” he shouted, his tiny voice reaching an ear-shattering pitch. “I could go get Auntie Lullaby upstairs if something happened!”
She chuckled wearily. She wasn’t sure how much more she trusted ‘Auntie’ Lullaby than Stardust by himself. After all, she remembered all the things she and Lullaby had gotten up to when they were his age.
But Stardust was fixing her with his saddest puppy-dog eyes now. She sighed. He always knew how to weasel whatever he wanted out of her. He always had, ever since he was little.
Hmmm… What would you do, Star?, she wondered wistfully.
“I… I don’t know, dear. We’ll talk about it more later, okay?”
“Aww, okay…” he said with a defeated sigh.
They walked mostly in silence after that. Stardust had lost a little bounce in his trot after that, preferring instead to walk at her side. She let one of her wings drape over him and he gratefully leaned into her embrace. Overhead, hanging lanterns lit the path they walked with a calming blue glow. While it was serene and tranquil, Moonshine missed the clatter of little hooves bouncing in the dirt.
Not a moment too soon, their treehome came into view. The residents of Hollow Shades, mostly bat ponies, lived in hollowed-out segments of the more massive trees of the grove. Most of the trees were large enough for two residences, one atop the other, but a rare few were able to support three. Rope bridges connected the upper sections in a winding labyrinth that Moonshine was glad she didn’t have to deal with often, seeing as how she lived on the ground level. Sure it was darker the closer you got to the ground, but it meant that Stardust didn't have to climb the wooden staircases that lined the outer perimeter of the trees just to go to and from home.
She shuddered and clutched her lantern a little closer.
Stardust sprinted ahead to the door as they got close. He still had to rear up onto his hindlegs to reach the knob, but soon he had the door wide open and he disappeared into the darkness inside. Some small chill ran down her spine at the sight, but she forced it away. She knew she was being silly. By the time she caught up and closed the front door behind her, Stardust had already gone around and lit the few lights they had in the living room. As she dumped her saddlebags by the door, Stardust bounded up before her.
“Momma, will you play with me?” he asked, once again bombarding her with his cutest face, this time even giving her a trembling lip that, despite knowing it was fake, still pulled at her heartstrings. Ignoring the tired ache in her limbs, she smiled.
“Of course, dear. What would you like to play?”
“Let’s play Stars and Fireflies! Pleasepleaseplease?” he begged. She laughed as she wondered why she had even asked. Of course he’d want to play his favorite board game.
“Alright, get it set up. We’ll play a few rounds before dinner.”
With a cheer he darted off to his room upstairs to grab the box. Moonshine, meanwhile, cleared a spot on the coffee table so they’d have room for the board. She collapsed onto their old, worn couch with a sigh, pleased to finally rest her weary limbs. A sudden twinge in her right knee flared up, and she rubbed it with a forehoof. Achy joints at her age? Star would laugh if he could see her now.
Soon enough Stardust came clattering down the stairs, the large game box balanced precariously on top of his head. He giggled uproariously as he slid the box off onto the empty table and together they began setting the board for their first round.
Stardust was adorable as they played. He counted every space aloud as he moved his token along the board and insisted on reading every card all by himself, even if he sometimes needed help understanding what they were asking him to do. Despite her help, he still managed to soundly beat her twice in a row. By the third game, Moonshine had been sitting down long enough that her tired eyes were starting to burn. Deciding just to rest them while Stardust was taking his turn, she laid her head on the couch’s armrest.
Next thing she knew she was waking up, stretching out a kink in her wing while rubbing the sleep from her eyes. She rose slowly, a blanket sliding off of her. That was odd; she couldn’t remember having a blanket while they were playing…
With a gasp, she looked at the coffee table to find it empty once again with no trace of their board game anywhere. She did, though, see Stardust sprawled in the middle of the floor, an arrangement of his little toy soldiers spread out before him. He made little yells and battle noises as he clashed them together.
“Did you put the game away, Little Star?” she asked, her voice still a little slurred from her nap.
“Yes, Momma. I packed it up after you fell asleep,” he said, not looking away from his toys. Her ears folded back as she felt a pang of guilt.
“Momma’s sorry, Little Star. She’s just had a long day at work,” she said. He didn’t say anything, nor turn away from his make-believe battle.
She sighed and stood, stretching out her back and legs, the former of which gave a loud pop. Taking a glance at the clock said she was already late for dinner, so something quick was called for.
“Are you hungry, Dear? How about your favorite?” she sing-songed, knowing it would get his attention. Sure enough, his ear quirked, and she could just see him looking at her out of the corner of his eye.
“Sea salt hayfries?”
“Uh huh, and how about this weekend I make some apple muffins with mango jam?” she asked.
His little wings fluttered excitedly and he jumped to his hooves, giving a high-pitched squeal of delight. He began prancing around her, his toys long forgotten.
“Alright, alright. Why don’t you clean up your things while I make dinner, okay?” she asked.
“Okay, momma!” he cried happily and in a flash he was scooping his figures up and tossing them into the plastic tub he kept them in.
Smiling at his antics, Moonshine trotted into the kitchen, where her mirth was short-lived. She’d forgotten that she hadn’t cleaned up after last night’s meal, which had been even later than tonight’s. Dirty dishes were stacked in the sink and the lasagna she’d accidently left out had likely gone bad. Sighing, she tossed it out and set about cleaning what she needed for hayfries. She was thankful, at least, they were easy to make and by the time Stardust had finished putting away his things, she had a plate ready to go for him. She didn’t care much for hayfries, so instead she made a simple daisy sandwich with an apple on the side. It may not have been a five-course cuisine meal, but it was good enough for a Thursday night.
As they ate, Stardust regaled her with stories of what happened in school and at Night-Care, though she had a hard time keeping up with either. He talked about all his little friends like she knew each and every one of them, even though she’d only met (or even heard of) only a few. Still, she nodded at the appropriate times and agreed that it wasn’t very nice that Echo had called Mulberry a loser, and that seemed to satisfy him.
Still, Stardust ate with the ravenousness of a pony who hadn’t seen food in days and soon enough his plate was empty and his belly full. Just as he swallowed his late bite, he let out a burp that nearly rattled the windows of their tiny home.
“Little Star, manners!” Moonshine admonished.
“Sorry, Momma,” he said, not looking it in the slightest, giving her a grin that said he knew he wasn’t about to get in trouble. And she had to admit, she didn’t have the heart to punish him.
“Alright. It’s almost bed time for little colts,” she said, her joints popping as she slowly stood. With a groan, she remembered she still had yet to clean the kitchen before she could get ready for bed. “Why don’t you go take your bath and then you can play for a little bit, okay?”
“Do I have to?” he whined.
“Yes, dear. You have school in the evening and you need to look your best. Now go on, shoo!”
He stood from his chair, grumbling to himself as he made for the door. Moonshine turned to get started on the dishes when she just barely heard Stardust mumble before he whipped out the door.
“…so unfair. Dad wouldn’t make me take a bath. He’d let me stay up late…”
She could still hear him grumbling as he tromped up the stairs. She laughed mirthlessly. Foals always think every bad thing is the end of the world, don’t they?
Of course, Little Star was right. Star would have let him stay up late. Probably played Stars and Fireflies with him all night, too, without falling asleep. There was a reason Little Star thought he was the perfect father. When he was home, at least. Star was the fun one, buying him toys and not making him eat his alfalfa. It was no wonder Little Star loved him more.
She sniffed and wiped her suddenly wet eyes.
Eventually she had the dishes cleaned and the counters scrubbed down from the day-to-day grime that had built up since the day before yesterday. Wearily tossing down the dishrag she’d been using, she forced her limbs to carry her up the stairs, stopping at the door to Stardust’s room. He was lying on his stomach in the middle of the floor, dripping everywhere as he was once again reenacting some grand battle with his toy soldiers.
“Momma’s going to take a bath, Little Star. If I’m not out in twenty minutes, you need to put your things away and get to bed, okay?” she asked, trying to sound more authoritative than she felt at the moment.
He acknowledged her with a flick of his ear and a distracted “Yes, Mom,” while still focusing on his toys. She wasn’t completely convinced he heard her, but deciding it wasn’t worth it to argue further, she turned and entered the bathroom.
The air was still warm and humid from Stardust’s bath, and the feeling intensified as she began running the water for her own. While she waited for the tub to fill, she popped into her bedroom to grab a novel she’d been working on. As soon as her bath was ready, she shut off the water and slid in.
The heat felt like heaven against her sore muscles. She lied on her stomach, chin resting on the tub’s side as the long night’s exhaustion was gently eased away. Steam rolled in waves about her, dulling her senses as she simply enjoyed a single moment of relaxation. Her book was quickly forgotten as her eyes fluttered closed. It was so tempting to just doze off for a few minutes.
But she knew she needed to make sure Stardust got to bed on time so that he wouldn’t be tired at school tomorrow. The last thing she needed was for Mrs. Thistle to complain that Stardust couldn’t stay awake during class at their next Parent Teacher Conference. It was bad enough that she thought he suffered from a ‘lack of stability’ at home.
Still, that didn’t mean she couldn’t have a few minutes to just unwind.
But all good things must come to an end and she eventually had to actually wash up and get out of the cooling water. She dried herself off with a fluffy towel, tossing it in the hamper atop Stardust’s and checked the clock again. Only five minutes past his bedtime.
His door was closed as she approached. Opening it gently, she was surprised to find the lights off and Stardust already curled up under the covers.
“Little Star, are you still awake?” she asked quietly. His furry ears popped up into view.
“Yes, Momma.”
Leaving the door open to provide a little light from the hall, she carefully trod around his bed and sat down at his side. She fussily tucked the blankets about him and brushed a hoof across his mane.
“Thank you for doing as I asked, dear. You can stay up late this weekend, alright? We can do something fun. How’s that sound?”
“Can we go visit Auntie Lullaby or Uncle Space Out?” he asked.
“Of course we can,” she said, smiling. “If they’re not busy, maybe we can even go on a picnic together. We haven’t done that in a while!”
Stardust smiled and nodded before settling back into bed. She brushed his mane one last time before she stood.
“Alright, sounds like a plan. Sweet dreams, my Little Star,” she said, leaning down to place a kiss on his head. He gave a contented sigh as she made her way back to the door. Just before she closed it behind her, Stardust spoke up.
“Momma?”
Sighing, she turned back around, leaning against the doorframe. “Yes, dear?”
“When’s Daddy coming home?”
Her breath caught.
“H-he… He’ll have leave again next month. He’ll be home for a whole week this time!”
He didn’t say anything. Instead, his shoulders slumped and he rolled back to face the wall, disappearing behind his blankets again.
“Little Star, y-you know he comes home as often as he can! It’ll… it’ll get better, okay? I promise,” she said.
Still no response.
“O-okay. Well, goodnight, Little Star.”
“Night, Momma,” he whispered, sounding every bit as tired as she felt.
As an icy coldness bloomed across her chest, she hesitated just a moment before closing the door behind her. Once again her weary body made itself known as her legs threatened to give out and she braced herself against the door frame.
She just needed a moment.
Just one moment.
She just couldn’t take anymore. Maybe –hopefully– a good night’s sleep will help. When the strength returned to her legs, she made her way back downstairs. She locked the doors and turned out all the lights, but not before grabbing her lantern from where she’d left it by the couch. Then, by her lantern’s gentle glow, she returned upstairs and to her bedroom.
Her princess-sized bed felt soft as a cloud as she collapsed onto its right side. She made to set her lantern on the nightstand when her hoof brushed the one photo frame she kept there, nearly knocking it over. Picking it up carefully, she gazed at it, letting old memories wash over her.
It was a simple picture, just the three of them sitting together in the living room. Space Out had taken it, if she could remember right. Stardust was still in diapers, and she still wore her mane in those ridiculous pigtails she used to like. She sat cradled in the hooves of the only colt she’d ever loved.
The same grey coat that Stardust had inherited. The lustrous burgundy mane hidden under his cobalt helmet. She remembered it was the first time he’d ever worn that armor. They’d all been so proud that he had the honor of being chosen to guard their beloved Princess Luna. She knew, even back then, that it would be hard, but she couldn’t have imagined…
She was crying again. She hugged that picture frame tight to her chest as the tears poured forth. She wasn’t even sure why anymore. Whether for herself, her son, or the husband she never got to see, she cried. Maybe the why didn’t even matter.
Maybe she was just… tired.
She lost track of time as she lied there, letting the stresses of life flow out of her and into the pillow beneath her head. It had been years since she’d decried life as unfair, but it was hard not to feel it was that night.
She jumped when she heard the flame of her lantern sputtering. Only then did she see how low it had gotten, barely clinging to life and bathing the room in near pitch-blackness. Heart racing, she fumbled for the spare bottle of oil she kept in the bottom drawer of her nightstand. When she finally found it at the very back under a sock, she dumped it into her lantern’s reservoir, setting new life into the flame at the last minute before it died. She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding as the shadows receded once again.
Her heart got another jolt as the door creaked open behind her. Blackness waited in the hallway beyond, setting her frazzled mind on edge until Stardust’s tiny head poked in.
“L-Little Star? What are you still doing up, dear? Can’t sleep?” she asked, her voice thick and wet. Realizing she must look a mess, she hurriedly wiped a hoof across her face, trying to brush away the wet stains on her cheeks.
“Can I sleep with you tonight?” he asked.
She opened her mouth, already prepared to tell him no but that hopeful look in his eyes wouldn’t let her say it. It wouldn’t hurt just for one night. And she couldn’t deny a little company was welcome.
“Alright, dear. Come on, it’s way past your bedtime.”
Together they crawled under the covers where Stardust settled against her chest beneath a foreleg. She held him tight as he wiggled until he was comfortable. They lied in silence, enjoying each other’s warmth and presence as their breathing slowed and sleep was right around the corner. Nuzzling her chest, Stardust mumbled through the last remnants of consciousness.
“I heard you cryin’, Momma. Don’t be scared. I’ll protect you from the dark.”
One final time that night, Moonshine’s eyes felt a little damp, though she managed a weak laugh despite them. With one last kiss to the top of her son’s head, she hugged him close.
“I know you will, dear. You’ll light up the dark, my Little Star.”
Author's Note
A little thing I wrote for a good friend of mine, whose characters I utterly adore.
