All Our Yesterdays
All Our Yesterdays
Load Full StoryThere is no such thing as forever, Twilight Sparkle.”
The moon hung low, adrift in a sea of stars. Had she wished, she was certain she could have reached out and touched it with a hoof, or brushed its vibrant glow with the feathers of a wing. Yet as near as it seemed to her even then, standing astride the highest cloud, she knew that it would always be out of reach.
Twilight looked out across the night, remembering, trying to remember. Forever had been a different word before, all those forevers ago. It was something to be promised, but never experienced, an innocent word that meant nothing more or less than as long as I live. And how thoughtlessly she had promised it, never suspecting that she would spend so many of those forevers wishing that she had had just a little more time.
“As long as I live,” she whispered. Had she known then what she did now, perhaps she wouldn't have been so careless, and perhaps as long as I live would have been long enough.
The starlight stirred beside her. “Do you blame me?”
“Blame you?” Twilight frowned. “No, of course not. There is nothing to be blamed for.”
“I always worried that you might. You would not be wrong to. It is no easy thing to ask of another, let alone of oneself.”
“I knew what it meant,” Twilight said. “Even if it took me too long to fully understand.” She had accepted the fact that, in time, her friends must all leave her behind. At least, she thought she had—it was difficult to tell, now, long ago as that time had been. But there had always been one thing she was sure would last forever.
She turned to look at the flickering figure beside her. It was so strange; pale, fragile, its mane an intangible swirling of celestial lights, much like that of its sibling's. But the voice was the same, the familiar tinkling of laughter just below the surface of the words. And a smile that shone with the warmth of the sun.
“Even the stars must one day rest, Twilight,” the starlight told her. “But that does not mean they simply disappear. Their light shines on, for eons after they have gone.”
“But only in echoes. Only memories.”
“Is that what you're afraid I'll become? Just a memory?”
No, she was not afraid of that. “Some things become memory too quickly,” she said. “Too easily. And then it's only a matter of forgetting.” Our experiences, our hopes and dreams; laughter, tears; loves... and friends. “I don't want to forget.”
“If you are afraid of forgetting, then those are the things that are worth remembering. You will not lose them.”
“Were you ever afraid?” she asked. “Afraid you might lose something?”
The starlight hummed. “Someone. When I sent my sister away, it did not cross my mind that she might never forgive me. What scared me more was if she should not remember me; worse, that I might forget her, and the pony that she was. As it turned out, one can forget a great many things in a thousand years. All the bitterness and resentment, all the scorn, rejection, and discontent, all of it was forgotten. In the end, all we remembered was how much we loved and cared for one another. All we wanted was to be reunited.” The starlight smiled. “And we have you to thank for much of that.”
“She'll miss you dearly,” Twilight said. “I promise, I will do what I can to be there for her.”
“Luna and I have had lifetimes to reconcile our parting,” the figure replied. “You needn't worry about her. She will join me one day, in her own time. As will you.”
One day. But how many uncountable days were between that day and this? “Celestia,” she blurted suddenly, “why did it have to be me?”
“It didn't,” the starlight answered after a moment's silence. “Destiny did not choose you. Fate did not bring you to me, snugly wrapped around its claw.” A wry smile. “If that is what you were thinking.”
“Then... why?”
“Because only you could be you. I chose you not for what you might accomplish, but for the pony that you were. The pony that you are. Look with me, now.” The starlight drew close to her, and Twilight felt a curious sensation as her sight slid from her body. She was in Canterlot, in Ponyville; Manehatten, Cloudsdale, and beyond even Equestria, in places she had never been, whose names she could only ponder. But everywhere she was she could see ponies, ponies looking to the sky, to the east, waiting for the dawn to come again. Lovers, parents with foals, friends or even strangers; all had their faces turned toward the heavens, seeking the light of morning.
“The sun is a promise,” spoke her companion, who was everywhere with her. “A promise of a new day, a new life; of beginnings, and an end to endings. You are that promise made flesh, Twilight. Could it have been another? Perhaps. But I have only to look at these ponies, whose lives are filled with kindness and hope, to know that I made the right choice, to know that I am leaving them in the hooves of one who will do more good for them than I ever could. Ours may not be a blessing, but neither is it a curse. It is simply a state of being, one in which we have the ability to ensure that every pony be allowed to know and share in the same love and compassion that we have.”
The vision wavered, and her sight returned, but it was to find that her eyes were clouded with tears. “All of these ponies look to me, now,” Twilight said. “To bring them light, and warmth, and happiness. And I will gladly give them all that and more. I will do my best every day to be wise, and kind, to be the leader you believe me to be. I just never thought that...” She pawed at her eyes, hanging her head as the drops fell, each one like a tiny prick of starlight. “I wish I didn't have to face the sunrise alone.”
“Alone?” Celestia said softly, and Twilight felt a gentle nudge against her cheek. “No. Never alone, Twilight Sparkle.”
She looked up, and there in front of her was the shimmering image of a pony she had once known. Her shaggy mane was hazy with energy, and her wings were dappled with the selfsame light as that of the stars that framed her in the sky beyond, but her eyes glimmered with the familiar spark that they had always known in life, now somehow burning all the brighter.
“Rainbow...?” Twilight whispered. Her starlit friend merely smiled. But it was true, and past her Twilight could make out the forms of the others, suspended in the night. Rarity and Applejack, tails entwined as always; Fluttershy, her quiet smile worth a million words; and Pinkie Pie, with a face looking to outshine the moon above her.
Twilight leapt into the sky, laughing and crying as her friends reached out one by one to touch her, hold her, comfort her, and she responded in kind. Their caresses were like lost moments now found, written in the stars. “How?” she asked Celestia breathlessly. “How did you do this? How did you find them?”
“You had never lost them. They were always with you, will always be with you. As shall I.” The starlight bent to kiss her forehead. “We are more than the span of our lives on this world, however brief or lingering. It is what we leave behind—the comfort we give, and what little pain we can take away—that is our true legacy. There is no such thing as forever, Twilight. Not in this world. Not for them, nor even for us. But there is one thing that is enduring, that transcends even time itself. You see the proof of it in front of you. Think of all the lives you might touch, given the time that you have. And then remember the ones that touched your own. Their love will spread from you, and touch the entire world.”
As if they had heard, a radiance blossomed from the hearts of her five friends. It grew in warmth and brilliance, until suddenly Twilight could feel the heat within herself, deep in her chest, pulsing and beating and glowing like the sun. She felt as if the light of the world was held within her, ready to burst.
“And you thought you were alone?” Celestia asked tenderly.
No. Not anymore. Twilight touched her head to that of the pony before her. There was a calming coolness along her neck as Rainbow wrapped starry hooves about her, and the overwhelming feeling inside her chest began to recede.
“You will see them again. You can be sure of that.”
“One day,” Twilight whispered as she gently pulled away. Wait for me, my friends. I'll be with you again soon. She looked to the east, to where the horizon embraced the sky, and saw the place where the first rays would reach out and touch the world. But not yet. There is a promise I must keep.
It was easier than she expected. Maybe it was Celestia's faith in her, or perhaps her friends, beacons of strength beside her in the moonlight. Her horn lit like fire, and with a single surge that left her breathless the morning broke, spilling its warmth and its light over everything. And in that moment she was everything too, everything the light touched, and she could see the ponies she had glimpsed before, laughing and smiling and pointing to the sky as the light of the morning washed over them. They were her legacy now, each one an individual to be cherished and loved. They were her future, and the future of all, and theirs was the promise of the sun. As dawn graced the clouds and the smiling faces of her friends began to fade once more into starlight, she could swear she heard their voices again, echoing as one within her mind.
Let there be light.
