Jangelaphobia: A Good Reason For It
Twilight Sparkle sat at a cafe in canterlot absently mindedly flipping through a menu she was given. She had just finished visiting Celestia about the Tree Castle in Ponyville. It was then she saw something that caught her eye. One of the menu options, it was highlighted in a light blue, was for a new food that the ponies running the cafe called Jello.
From what she could see it was some kind of dessert, and it had different flavors such as grape, cherry, apple, and even rasberry. The jello was rather cheap, just a few bits.
Twilight, curious and willing to try something new, ordered every single flavor, eager to try the new treat that was presented before her. Poking the jello with her spoon she noted it was not a liquid but acted like it, and not a solid but kept its shape. Pulling out her microscope she examined a piece of the substance.
“It's a viscoelastic polymer made out of polypeptide chains but you eat it!" She exclaimed with some excitement, holding back the urge to clap her hooves together. It was, after all, unbecoming for a princess to act foolish in public.
Continuing to poke she finally scooped up some and took a bite.
“Mh…” she hummed in delight. It still was solid, but almost seemed to melt in her mouth at the same time.
It was delicious, and that was just the cherry alone! Proceeding to finish that one she moved onto the grape, notting that it tasted even better then the last. She moved through each flavor, savoring every one of them, which took some where near an hour, and she found her favorite by far was the grape. Her appetite suppressed, Twilight walked to the counter with a smile, and felt the need to give the cook her thoughts on the wonderful treat.
“How can I help you Princess?” asked the earth pony at the counter.
“Yes, may I ask who made the jello dessert, it was delicious,” she asked the pony curiously.
“Of course Princess, it was Pinkie Pie, she’s in the kitchen now,” he said pointing towards a door behind the counter with his hoof.
“May I go back and talk to her?” she said a little stunned.
“Certainly,” the stallion opened up the counter door and giving the young alicorn entrance to the back.
Giving the stallion a nod of thanks she made her way into the kitchen where she saw Pinkie Pie stirring a pot joyously. The pink mare seemed to be overly ecstatic about her creation, not noticing the alicorn approaching her from the doorway.
“Pinkie!” Twilight called out.
“Oh hi Twilight,” the pink mare said excitedly with a beaming smile, “Did you try the jello?”
“The jello was amazing Pinkie!” Twilight said with an approving nod.
“Oh goodie!” The pinkie was clapping her hooves together and yet the spoon continued to stir the pot as if someone still held it.
“How did you make it Pinkie, I would absolutely love to learn how you made it!" She said eagerly at a chance to learn something new.
“Silly Twilight! It’s easy,” she said, “Just take some of this, a dash of this, a pinch of that, and blend it all together.” The mare had taken a box for the first thing, a bowl for the second and a cup for the third. At the last bit the mare had stirred vigorously.
“Then I take my special ingredient, and mix it in too!” She giggled.
“What’s the special ingredient?” Twilight inquired.
“Not telling, you have to give me a Pinkie Promise!” The pink mare said seriously.
"Fine. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my-OW!" She exclaimed. At some point during her promise Pinkie, feeling pranksy, placed cupcake in her hoof. The now glazed alicorn wiped the frosting from her eye and face. Her eye blinked rapidly as it tried to remove the foreign substance that had dare violate her eye.
"Okie Dokie Loki! So, it's this!" Pinkie held up a dark gray solid mush. Twilight nodded.
"Yes, and what exactly is that, per say?" Twilight tilted her head trying to get a proper look. Pinkie look back just as confused.
"You can't tell?" Pinkie asked.
"No," Twilight shook her head.
"Boiled hooves!" She giggled. Twilight, shocked to the extreme, whispered back.
"Hooves? They're," she shivered, "the secret ingredient?"
"Yup!" Pinkie grinned. Twilight paled, her lavender coat turning a near white.
"I think I need to lay down..." She muttered, leaving the room.
Once the alicorn was out of sight Discord pulled himself out of Pinkie's mane. "Want to try making some Rock Candy?"
"Sure!" Pinkie pulled out a deep blue unicorn horn, which was pounded with a mallet by Discord.
Upon arriving home, Twilight lifted upon a container of Jello, and turned it around before calling for Spike to write a letter to Celestia.
Dear Princess Celestia,
Today, I tried the desert that arrived with this letter. Pinkie Pie was working at a small café and apparently whipped it up. Upon tasting it, I asked to talk to the chef, Pinkie, and was disturbed by her answer on how to make it. I suggest you talk to Pinkie as I Pinkie Promised to keep it a secret.
Twilight Sparkle
Upon finishing the letter she lay down to recover from the shockingly horrific experience. Meanwhile, in Canterlot Castle, Celestia had tried the desert, which she found delicious, and had called on Pinkie who appeared seemingly from nowhere.
"Hiya Princess! Watcha need?" The mare bubbled, "Oh! Try this!" She shoved a crystal looking substance into the Princess' mouth. "I call it, Rock Candy!" Celestia crunched the candy, notting the flavor, before swallowing the candy.
"Its very good Pinkie, but I'd like to ask about your secret ingredients for your new creations," she said.
"Only with a Pinkie Promise," Pinkie said, defiantly.
"Very well. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye-" she interrupted herself with a muffled yelp of pain. A cupcake had intruded midway and followed her hoof to her open eye.
Pinkie giggled before motioning Celestia closer. Whispering in her ear, "Boiled hooves and pounded unicorn horn."
Celestia, normally, was not easy to shock, nor to make scream, but the answer to the question broke her rather quickly.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" She screamed, which was heard for miles away from the castle. In Luna's tower she and Discord laughed madly at the expense of her sister.
A frightening take? A prank pulled in good spirits? Perhaps, but the lesson remains.
Sometimes, you really are what you eat.