Red vs Blue: The Ponyville Chronicles

Things had only gone from bad to worse atop Blue Base with Rainbow Dash pacing around anxiously and Twilight Sparkle checking out over the vacant field with her sniper propped against one of the stone walls. “So…” Twilight shot a deathly glare back at Breaburn who was fiddling with his hooves in worry, forcing him to take a gulp at the harsh look, “you just up and gave that red our flag. Do I have that right?”

“Well… define gave?” Breaburn tried to joke.

“What? Bad? Noooo…” Twilight said with heavy sarcasm, “It’s not bad at all. In fact, how about next time she comes over, you just give her all our grenades to shove up our tank’s gun!? And while you’re at it, how about you help her blow our base to Cloudsdale!?”

“Stop whining you two, I see her,” Rainbow Dash informed them, pointing a single hoof at a distant yellow shape with red lining.

“Sighted,” Twilight confirmed as she locked her sniper on the running pegasus before she ducked out behind a small build of rocks, “she’s using the rocks as cover, I can’t get a lock on her.”

Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes at this and thought aloud, “A pegasus that won’t fly and is still able to avoid us? We’re dealing with one bad mother bucker here…”

“Okay, okay…” Fluttershy used the faces of the rocks to level out her flag as she tried to gain her bearings. “I remember seeing this on the way out from the base; I’m sure of it…”

Getting a lock on her target once more, Twilight put her sniper down in anger. “That armor… It’s sergeant red. Take a look Dash.”

Sure enough, the rainbow pegasus looked but didn’t look to convinced. “Well yeah. But doesn’t their sergeant wear a cowpony hat and have a blond mane?”

“You saw they just got a new vehicle. Commands are known to never send high grade supplies without a new recruit with them. Case and point, Buck-Face back there came with our tank,” Twilight said with a careless gesture to Breaburn, “they could’ve received a unicorn that specializes with disguises or the power to alter another ponies appearance… Either way, that would explain how she manager to get passed us.”

“No offence,” Breaburn spoke up, “but weren’t the two of ya’ playin’ loud music and not lookin’ ta’ the entrance that she used?”

“We’re not pointing at anypony here, alright?” Rainbow Dash snapped since she knew he was right. “Let’s just shoot her dead and get our flag back.”

“Fair enough…” Twilight tucked her rifle under one of her legs and began to aim the scope at her target as close as she could. Her left hoof clicked into the pump trigger and readied to kick it foreword as she fixed onto the back of the yellow mare’s head. “Sayonara, sergeant…” with a click and a quick cocking push Twilight unloaded four shots at her target; each of which made not even a graze to any inch of the target. From this, even Rainbow Dash had become silent along with Breaburn as they looked at their would-be-leader.

“…The sun was in my eyes…” Twilight muttered as if to convince herself, but gave a sharp look back as she felt her team looking at her, “What?”

“You suck at this,” Rainbow Dash scoffed with a laugh.

“At least I have a rifle!”

Thankfully for Fluttershy she didn’t need to strain herself too much to dodge the bullets from behind her. “Oh my…” Fluttershy shivered and looked back at the ‘store’ she was just at, judging the direction of the bullets as coming from there, “E-Excuse me?” she yelled to them, using the blue flag as a means to draw attention to her with light wavers, “Could you not shoot at me? I’m the one who bought this flag? Well… not so much bought… more of bartered for it. Well… it wasn’t really bartering either… I guess in some way—“

The Blue team couldn’t understand a word she was saying, but they could tell she was taunting them with their own flag. “You see that? She’s t-bagging us now!” Rainbow Dash growled, forgetting the initial meaning of ‘t-bagging’ but being too embarrassed to care.

“Enough dancing around the confirmation,” Twilight grew stern as she put her sniper down once more and getting up to all four and meeting her team’s eyes, “Dash and I will take the teleporter and cut her off at the pass. Breaburn, you stay here and hold the fort… Try not hocking out stuff off to anyone this time.”

“You got it, ma’am,” Breaburn struck a salute.

“Good… are you all ready, Dash?” Twilight asked while strapping her rifle into and against her armor’s back.

“I can fly… I’ll just fly my way over there,” Rainbow Dash offered.

“That will only give away our position. Come on. These teleporters are absolutely safe. Why else would they give us them if they didn’t work?” Twilight tried to reassure her partner.

“The same dick-mules that give a tank to ponies that don’t know how to drive it?”

“We’ve already run preliminaries on it…”

“Preliminaries?” Rainbow Dash grew distressed and pointed a front leg at a distant boulder resting out by the side of their base, “We threw Tom through it!”

“That’s right. And Tom came out perfectly fine, didn’t he? That in itself means it works,” Twilight noted, ignoring Breaburn’s confused expression at the mention of a ‘Tom’.

“Tom was steaming and covered and black gunk when he came out… took me hours to get him back here and clean him off.”

“Oh. I see now… the pieces have all come together,” Twilight shook her head in disappointment, “You can’t stand the color black.”

“…Yes. That’s it. You’ve got me. I hate the color black,” dryly replied Rainbow Dash.

With a sigh, Twilight’s horn started to shimmer. “I almost hate to do this to you, Dash…”

A soft light began to encase Rainbow Dash, prompting the pegasus to give a dark look to her horned team mate. “You wouldn’t dare…”

“This happening one of two ways at this point,” Twilight tipped her head to the teleporter, moving Rainbow Dash towards it with the aid of her magic, “Either A: we both walk through this portal and get our flag back. Or B: I toss you through and leave you to be the gun fodder while I come in after you. A win-win in my opinion.”

Slow as it took, Rainbow Dash gave a groan into her defeat and nodded, prompting Twilight to put her back down. “Just so we’re clear… Tom isn’t a pony… he’s a rock. Rocks aren’t ponies.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. Now go.” Twilight threatened Rainbow Dash with her horn again.

“Son of a—Whatever…” without another word, Rainbow Dash charged through the portal and fizzled away.

The two remaining ponies remained silent while watching the field before them. “…She didn’t come out yet…” Breaburn noted.

“An interesting development to be sure… but one I won’t be exploring myself,” Twilight admitted quickly as she darted down the stone ramp of the base and onto the open battlefield. “Like I said before. Stay here. Don’t lose our stuff. And for the love of god, don’t do anything stupid!”

Breaburn watched as his one remaining team mate charge across the field and after their flag. However so, his mind could only drift to one thing. “…What’s a Tom?”

Back at Red Base, Big Mac was ducking behind one of the stone guards on top of their base and Spike had decided to do the same, but with unsure reasoning. “Maybe it’s just your pony ears, because I didn’t hear any gun shots.”

“Ah’ know what ah’ heard,” Big Mac sighed, taking his sniper out from the clutch on his back and stationing it to scope out the area, “four shots. Bam, bam, bam…”

“…Bam.” Big Mac gave Spike a confused look at that, “you missed one.”

“Wait…” Big Mac noticed something moving in his scope, so decided to zoom in, “eeeyup. We’ve got a blue on the move…”

“Really? Is it moving towards us?” Spike asked anxiously.

“Hold it…” Big Mac muttered while changing his sights on a new target, “Ah’ see Fluttershy too. Looks like she’s got—“ quickly, Big Mac dropped his sniper and turned a serious look to Spike, “Spike. Get the Draconequus…”

After a short snicker, Spike looked to Big Mac, “You mean the Bucker?”

“Uh-huh, just keep makin’ jokes. That’ll save our partner…”