A single red rose, the whispering of the soft breeze around me, the way a cloud drifts across the sky, the glow of Princess Celestia’s golden sun, the way the shadows are cast on the ground. It’s amazing how, when you know the end is drawing nearer with each breath you draw, everything you once thought mundane or trivial suddenly becomes so vibrant. And not just physical things, memories and emotions as well. It’s almost like, like the world is trying to apologize for what it is soon to do to you. An apology that I, for one, will fully accept and cherish with all my heart. Most ponies would not do so, they would instead become bitter and withdrawn for however much time they have left. All that will accomplish, is hurting those who care about you and don’t want to see you suffer.
I, however, do not see the point of changing who you are for the worse because of something that is beyond your control. Rather than dwell on the rough aspects of my life, I choose to embrace the beauty that I’ve never seen until now. A beauty so pure, I cannot fathom why it was so unclear before this. Before gaining the knowledge that I’m living on borrowed time. With each breath I take, many things I’ve wondered about my past are being brought to light. All my life has been a song. A sad, mournful song at times, but a song nonetheless. My song is finally reaching its peak, a peak that I will be sure to make the best it can possibly be. I just wish I had more time to make it as great as I’d hope it could get to be.
But, is it truly the time we live that matters most? Or is it the quality of whatever time we had with those who touched our hearts the most?
Throughout my life, I’ve often wondered how I came to be friends with a pony who is practically my polar opposite. Vinyl Scratch is loud, messy, unsophisticated, and loves to play that electronic/dubstep/whatever it’s called and claims that it’s music. Whereas I favor classical music, high society functions, and a neat, at least somewhat orderly life. And yet, even with our many differences, I love her anyway. She is my one and only true friend.
Ever since I met her, she’s been the best part of my life. The one pony I can really be myself around and not be afraid to be judged for it, or worry that one of my secrets will find itself in the news for everypony to read. I just wish that I’d seen just how wonderful she is sooner. I hate that it had to take so long for me to figure out something that’s been staring me in the face for years now. Foolish as it is, I wish I could turn back time, and be given years and years of time to show her how much she means to me, but, with things as they are, I will just have to do everything I can to make up for lost time. Whatever it takes, I want, no, I need her to understand that. Then maybe I can leave this world with at least some small semblance of fulfillment and peace.
Although, is it really peace that I want? Somehow, it feels like I’m searching for something else, something…something more. Something that would hold a deeper level of emotion and meaning to me. If only I knew what that thing could be.
And yet, maybe…maybe I’ve already found it.
Music has always meant so much to me. Ever since I was a young filly, I was infatuated with it. Hearing a full orchestra play, it made my heart feel warm and…if I’m not mistaken, I was feeling true happiness. And when I picked up a cello, and my hooves touched the bow and strings for the first time, that first note, as out of tune and probably quite terrible sounding as it was, is the note that made me who I am. That was not the first note of my song, but it was the beginning of what I then thought to be the best part of my life.
I lost sight of what music really meant the moment I began performing. In the beginning, yes, it was more about sharing the beauty of song amongst all the ponies in Equestria that I could, but, as time went on, it became more and more about money, and individual gain. I was so caught up in all the parties and prestige that went with being the best cellist in the Canterlot Symphony Orchestra, that the true emotion of the notes I played had left me. Yet again, I find a part of my life that I wish I had realized sooner. And once more, I find myself wishing I could turn back time, only to be disappointed with the reality of such an impossibility.
And so, all I can do now is use what time I have left to its fullest. At least once, I need to feel the true power of the music and see the true message hidden beneath the notes. Time enough for one more song, that’s all I ask. To anypony else, it wouldn’t mean anything, but to me, it would mean the world. For I would be able to see the true beauty in life once again.
My name is Octavia Melody, and soon, my song will have faded away to nothing. And yet, if nothing else, I'd like to be remembered by this one, final verse:
Each and every moment of our life is one to cherish, whether it is good or bad. You can never know when these moments will cease to be available to you. The glass through which we see life is fragile, for one reason. It was made to be broken. It's up to use to break it, all it takes is a single leap of faith. Just one moment when any fears we have dissipate, and we truly have free will. In those few seconds, we learn more than we have our entire life. In that single moment, as that fragile glass shatters before our eyes we see all the colors of our world. Then, and only then, can we say that we understand the reality of purity, of finality, of life, and, of the most feared of all, of death.
