Celestia Gets Phone Tapped

by Probably Minion

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Slice of Life, Human
Length: 1251

Celestia gets phone tapped by David Brody from "Elvis Duran and the Morning Show".

Mass confusion breaks out when Princess Celestia becomes the victim of the ever Equestrian "Elvis Duran and the Morning Show" phone tap pulled off by Twilight and David Brody.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing in this story and don't intend to make fun of "Elvis Duran and the Morning Show" or anyone who listens to it. I'm a die-hard fan of the show and thought it would be funny to bring "Elvis Duran and the Morning Show" and MLP together for the first time.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-12-29 17:33:22 UTC

Don't Answer the Phone

DON'T ANSWER THE PHONE! THE ELVIS DURAN PHONE TAP!

"Okay Brody what's your phone tap about today?" asked Elvis.

"So today's phone tap comes in from Twilight Sparkle in some place called Equestria and she's doing it on her boss and former teacher Princess Celestia. Recently, Twilight just moved into in a new castle after her old home which was a library in some sort of tree was destroyed. What she wants to do is phone tap her boss and pretend as if someone is trying to buy the castle off of her and sell her a more low quality home. I play the part of the idiot who tries to buy the castle. Trust me, it's gonna be funny." said Brody.

"Well ok then. Let's listen in to today's phone tap by David Brody and Twilight Sparkle." said Elvis.

(Ringing standby noises)

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"Princess Celestia! Princess Celestia!" said Twilight

"Why hello Twilight! How are you liking the new castle?" asked Celestia

"That's why I'm calling you! Somepony is standing just outside the castle trying to buy it off of me and have me move into some run down house that looks like Fluttershy's cottage! I keep on telling him to go away but is insisting that he won't go away until I sell it to him. I really want you to tell him to go away!" said Twilight.

"This is a nice place! I'll pay ya 500 grand for it!" said Brody.

"Go away you pervert!" said Twilight.

"Oh c'mon Twilight! I'm willing to pay you an amount that's twice as much as it's worth." said Brody.

"Put this guy on the phone." said Twilight.

"Hey stranger, my boss wants to talk to you." said Twilight. (Drops phone out of second floor).

"Yeah who is this?" asked Brody.

"I don't know who you are thinking that my faithful student would be willing to give up her brand new castle which is her only housing option since her former home got destroyed in a fight she had against Tirek. Leave her alone or else bad things will happen!" said Celestia.

"C'mon Princess Celestia! I'm the richest pony in Equestria. No one has ever said no to an offer I made. I'm always willing to pay ponies a price that's double more than it's actually worth." said Brody.

"Oh shut up! You do know that you're trying to bribe royal Equestrian authority and that can result in up to 1 year in the dungeon?" said Celestia

"Oh please! Rules shmules! I honestly don't give a s**t about what you say to me! I ain't leaving until Princess Twilight agrees to at least consider my offer." said Brody.

"Listen to me you son of a b***h, if you're not at least 20 feet away from Twilight's castle within the next 5 minutes, I'm gonna send Shining Armour, who's the captain of my royal guard and Twilight's older brother out to arrest for you for tampering a royal authority! Take this as warning." said Celestia.

"Ok ok I'll leave but I gotta tell you something before I leave." said Brody. (Trying his best not to laugh).

"What is it?" asked Celestia.

"YOU GOT PHONE TAPPED!!!!!!" said Brody. (LOL'S REALLY LOUD)

"Hi Princess! I really got you this time!" said Twilight. (UNCONTROLLABLE LAUGHTER)

"Wait what? You phone-what me?!?!?!" asked Celestia.

"Princess Celestia, this is David Brody from Elvis Duran and the Morning Show and Twilight and I just phone tapped you!" said Brody.

"Good one Twilight. But honestly, I was just about ready to stick my head through the phone and bite this guy's face off!" said Celestia.

Rainbow Dash's Phone Tap

DON'T ANSWER THE PHONE! THE ELVIS DURAN PHONE TAP!

"Today's phone tap comes in from Rainbow Dash and the email says:

'Dear Elvis,

I want to phone tap my friend's former teacher Princess Celestia and make her think I'm joining the Shadowbolts, which are the evil alter-ego of the Wonderbolts, which is Equestria's Air Force. I want you to call her as the captain of the Shadowbolts and say I'm about ready to start my training. She will freak out and but then later hopefully get a good laugh out of it. Thanks again. Rainbow Dash'

Ok, so here's how it's gonna work. Froggy is gonna call Princess Celestia as the pony who's recruiting Rainbow Dash to join the Shadowbolts and Rainbow Dash is gonna later jump in and mess with her. Without further ado, let's listen to Rainbow Dash's phone tap."

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(RINGING STANDBY NOISES)

Celestia: Hello?

Froggy: Hi is this Princess Celestia?

Celestia: Yes, who is this?

Froggy: Hi Princess, my name is Forge-Lightning and I'm the recruiting director for the Shadow-Bolts and I'm calling to inform you that Rainbow Dash is about to complete the application process to become a reserve for the Shadow-Bolts.

Celestia: SHE'S DOING WHAT NOW?!?!?!?!?!

Froggy: Yes, I know this may seem surprising to you but don't worry, this is how most ponies react when they hear their loved ones are interested in joining the Shadow-Bolts.

Celestia: You gotta be kidding me, there's no way in hell she'd even consider joining the Shadow-Bolts. Spitfire, who's the captain of the Wonder-Bolts tells me time and time again that she's their first-string reserve and now she's turning her back on them. You know what, I'll call her and see what's going on here because there seems something suspicious about all this.

Froggy: Sounds good to me Princess, thanks for your time.

Celestia: Bye. (Hangs up)

Froggy: (Uncontrollable laughter) How was that for a set up?!?!?!?!?!?!

Rainbow Dash: Nailed it! She's calling me right now what should I do?

Froggy: Let that call go to voicemail and we'll call her back on the studio phone so I can hear what's going on.

Rainbow Dash: Ok then.

(RINGING STANDBY NOISES)

Celestia: Hello?

Rainbow Dash: Hey Princess.

Celestia: I'm so angry at you right now.

Rainbow Dash: What do you mean?

Celestia: Cut the bull s**t Rainbow Dash, THE SHADOW-BOLTS CALLED ME AND INFORMED ME YOU'RE INTERESTED IN BECOMING A RESERVE FOR THEM! WHY WOULD YOU EVEN CONSIDER JOINING THEM?!

Rainbow Dash: Well I mean, I said I was sort of interested. I never actually said I wanted to do it.

Celestia: You don't understand, even saying you're somewhat interested is bad enough. You have a bright future as a member of the Wonderbolts and now you're considering throwing it all away to become part of an evil organization?!?!?! C'mon Rainbow Dash, this isn't like you.

Rainbow Dash: (Uncontrollable crying) I'm sorry Princess!!!!! I think Discord probably tricked me into thinking the Shadowbolts would be good for me! I want to turn that s**thead back into stone because of this!

Celestia: I knew it! Alright, I'll inform Twilight to get back the Elements of Harmony so you can turn that dishonest monster back into stone.

Froggy: Actually Princess, that won't be necessary. (Tries hard not to laugh)

Celestia: Why?

Froggy: YOU JUST GOT PHONE TAPPED! (Laughs really hard)

Rainbow Dash: GOT YOU PRINCESS! HA! THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL I'D EVEN THINK ABOUT JOINING THE SHADOW-BOLTS!

Celestia: Wait, what? What's going on here? Is this a joke?

Froggy: Princess Celestia, this is Froggy from Elvis Duran and the Morning Show and Rainbow Dash and I just phone tapped you!

Celestia: Yeah I guess that's pretty funny. I was worried for a second there because I was close to throwing you in the dungeon for treason.