Popcorn...balls?

by Orange Pudding

Rating: everyone
Tags: Spike, Comedy, Twilight Sparkle, Random, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Granny Smith, Applejack, Original Character
Length: 2284

This is a cautionary tale on buying popcorn balls instead of real candy to hand out: Don't

No real story here, just fluff you'd most likely find inbetween chapters of actual, full-length stories. Didn't stop me, though.

And yeah, just.... don't, okay? Might as well hand out waxed lips if you're handing out popcorn balls. Geez...

Happy Nightmare Night, everypony!

Published 2014-10-30 04:50:08 UTC
Last updated 2014-10-30 04:50:08 UTC

A truly terrifying Nightmare Night

"Nightmare Night! What a fright! Gimme something sweet to bite!"

It was Nightmare Night at Sweet Apple Acres, and the usual batch of fillies and colts were going door to door, looking for candy to collect. This year, Granny Smith was manning the door, handing out candy for the little ones. "Well, if it ain't the little ones! Happy Nightmare Night young'ns!"

With a big smile on her face, she gleefully handed out the treats to the children, looking back upon her own Nightmare Nights with fondness...

A little purple unicorn in a vampony costume had a confused look adorned on her features. "Uhhhhhh, what are these?" she asked in bewilderment. She gestured toward the oddly shaped mass that was put into her bag by Granny Smith. The other fillies and colts had received similar objects that resembled something edible. It smelled vaguely of popcorn, vaguely, but it's rather dreadful odor suggested something much less tasty. As adults tended to call such foul foods: healthy.

The children shuddered at such a thought. Raw spinach, or even broccoli, were one thing. Being equines, they actually enjoyed their greens much more than certain breeds of homosapians. But once you cooked them, the vegetables they deemed okay at worst suddenly became horrifying grim reapers to their taste buds, yet they were practically Elements of Harmony to their insides. The deeper children in the schoolyard still wondered to this day how that sort of process worked.

So, now that such disgusting enemies of their preferred diets had invaded their only night a year where they could ask for candy from strangers and receive no consequences as a result, they couldn't help but shoot Granny Smith some questioning looks.

"Wha? Wha's that suppohsed ta mean? Ain't you young'ns ever heard of popcorn balls?"

A little orange pegasus dressed as her now recently favorite archaeologist adventurer in the group blinked. "Popcorn... balls?" She allowed the words to slowly escape her lips, her young mind just as slowly putting the two words together. Such confusion hovered over the others as well, never even thinking to associate such different words with one another.

The elder earth pony rolled her eyes at the display. "Kids these days... ya'll seriously never gott'n popcorn balls before?" The group of Nightmare Nighters shook their heads in response. "Well, now you have! Ah used ta receive these things all the time on Nightmare Night."

A silver pegasus colt masquerading as the mysterious swordspony of legend, Poro, recoiled in shock. "Did they hate you?"

Mrs. Smith was now the one to be confused. "Pard'n?" The inquisitive gazes of the young children told her that they were serious. "Why, Ah used ta love these things when Ah was yer age. Ate 'em up like they were my last food source, Ah did!"

This atrocity of sweetness was far more terrifying than any monster the Everfree Forest could spew, whatever ancient beast that held a grudge with the princesses when they did whatever they did a thousand years ago.

As the children murmured amongst themselves to decide what fate awaited Granny Smith for bringing outdated treats to their special night, one yellow earth pony filly quietly shrank beneath everypony's radar, having both the pleasure and displeasure of being related to the grandmother...

"I tried to tell you, Twilight, you should've just gone as Clover the Clever this year. Nopony even knows who Flashlight Shine is."

Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, Protector of Harmony, Hero of Equestria, head of the Friendship Table, Traveler of Worlds, sighed dramatically. "It's Starlight Shine, Spike. He was only a very famous majordomo of Princess Celestia's court. Back then, Nightmare Moon attacked and was banished, and Princess Celestia was devastated by losing her sister. It was thanks to Starlight Shine that she managed to carry on without her little sister to lean on!"

Spike, dressed yet again as a dragon (which was rather redundant, considering that he already was a fire-breathing dragon), shrugged. "Still say you should've tried somepony that was in a holiday carol."

The princess grunted in response. "But Clover's a Hearth's Warming pony..." She doubted her assistant really heard her, but thankfully one of her bestest friends was trotting up to her before the baby dragon could ask for clarification.

"Howdy, Twilight!" Applejack, Savior of Equestria, head of the Apple Clan, living embodiment of Honesty, Member of the Friendship Table, smiled at one of her closest friends. It faltered for only a second when she attempted to recognize Twilight's costume. She failed, and a goofy grin came back. "Didn't take mah advahce to be one of the other princesses, Ah take it?"

The purple alicorn groaned, and the orange earth pony mare giggled. She was dressed up as a zombie this year for Nightmare Night, her stetson gone and her mane let loose into a tangled and ratty mess, but she wasn't being completely unoriginal. No, instead, Sweet Apple Acres was hosting something this year they called "Zomponylypse". The idea was that when the sun went down, the farmers and farmhands would dress up as zombies, and pretend that the entire farm was "infested with zombies". Other ponies could go as zombies as well, or as survivors trapped on a farm with the monsters surrounding them.

The town liked the idea, and now the bulk of Ponyville were on the farm, participating in the event. Games, food, candy, prizes, and a haunted orchard maze were the attractions of the night. Business was expected to be so booming that some extra ponies had to be hired to help out at the event, which they didn't mind at all.

The earth pony was wearing some ratty saddlebags to go along with her costume. "So, ya'll wanna go hit some houses with Pinkie?"

This elicited a surprised gasp from Twilight. Applejack was a hard-working mare, and was very business-minded and mature. Sure, when she got competitive, she was about as mature as Rainbow Dash, but most of the time she was the level-headed one of the group. And when selling apples was concerned, she'd either be out there selling herself, or bucking the trees to get the apples to be sold. "Seriously? I thought you of all ponies would be opposed to doing something else when a big event's going on here." Twilight looked around at the other fillies and colts. "And aren't we a bit old for that?"

Applejack chuckled. "Yeah, Ah suppose, but that don't mean that we have ta stop. We're hardly grown mares ourselves! Don't ya think we should take advantage of that while we still can?" The princess was unimpressed with the explanation. She could tell that there was something else. Her raised eyebrow was indication enough for Applejack to let her friend in on everything. "(sigh) Okay okay, ya'll got me. The real reason Ah agreed to this was to escape the wrath of the children."

"The children?" Simply scanning the farm for anything the kids found offensive showed no promise.

"Take a gander at where Granny Smith is." Twilight obliged, and eyed the door to the Apples' home. A group of fillies and colts were gathered at the front door, surrounding the elder. She was handing out something... puffy, and orange. "Do ya see that?"

"Yeah. What is she handing out? Special marshmallows?"

The earth pony shook her head. "Nope. Them are popcorn balls."

This revelation caused the princess who stood her ground against many a fearsome foe to shudder. "Ohhhhh...." She still had vivid memories of that one fateful Nightmare Night in Canterlot, where she tasted a special-flavored brussell sprout popcorn ball. Her entire night was ruined once she bit into that disgusting mass of agony. She'd have preferred razor blades to that. At least the blood would've tasted better.

"Yep." Applejack sighed, pitying her poor, clueless grandmother. "Twilight, Ah love my family and all, but this ain't something Ah wanna get caught up in. Trying to warn her was fruitless, so Ah can only hope that the children don't egg us too much." She adjusted her saddlebags sadly while she looked her best friend right in the eye. "That don't make me a bad pony, right? Leaving Granny Smith and the other farmhooves to fend for themselves?"

Twilight vigorously shook her head. "What? No! Of-of course not! I'd probably abandon my family too... if they gave out.... bad candy...." Her face was red when she stopped, not wanting to dig herself any deeper as an uncomfortable silence hung over them.

Luckily, Spike managed to break the tension with a curt throat clearing. "Well, we should probably get going then. Don't want the little kids to take all the candy, right?"

The mares grinned, the tension shattering instantly, as if the moment previous had never occurred. "Yeah, that sounds like a great idea. Let's go." The two mares and one baby dragon walked off into the night, ready to hit up Ponyville for some sweets. They knew their older brothers would both tease them for acting childish, but they didn't care. Their shared sense of camaraderie made all the uncertainties and promises of the colts and fillies TPing their barn throughout the night melt away like a good Tootsie Pop.

Of course, their pace picked up a little when Applejack mentioned that their popcorn balls were to be butternut squash-flavored this year.

It was the next morning, and Sweet Apple Acres had been targeted by the vengeful children of the Night, their attack having resulted in their walls egged, their windows soaped, and everything else covered in toilet paper. This meant a big job for the Apples, their farmhooves, and friendly volunteers.

"Dern kiddies. Ah give them delicious treats and they repay me with leaving a big mess." The old green earth pony harumphed. "Well, next Nightmare Night, they can just pass ol' Sweet Apple Acres right on by, cuz they ain't gettin no popcorn balls next year!" Despite the fact that it just didn't register to the elder that such treats were not a very popular thing to hand out on Nightmare Night anymore, the silent cheers from everypony else suggested that maybe it was for the best. It made them all forget that the one who caused this mess to appear was unable to even clean it up.

"I guess I can see why Applejack hands out the candies every year..." Fluttershy said as she washed one of the higher windows on the barn.

Rainbow Dash agreed thematically with her old friend. "Yeah, I think that it's time for Granny Smith to retire from hand-outs. Then I don't have to cancel all my plans because of self-obligations I make up! Stupid blind loyalty..."

All of her other friends seconded the notion.

"Aw, it ain't that bad! If you sing a song in your head as you clean, it goes by waaay faster!" Pinkie Pie popped out of the chimney at that, singing a tune she made up on the fly, it turning into a complete song that was too vibrant and happy to resist singing along to.

After it was finished, Rarity, graceful as always, levitated a feather duster to Pinkie's dust covered snout, and gently brushed away the grime. "The song is wonderful, darling, but perhaps the chorus could do without the abrupt dropoff?"

The pink party pony gasped dramatically. "Omigosh, of course! I thought that the chorus was missing something..." Pinkie pulled a notesheet and quill with ink seemingly out of nowhere, and proceeded to correct her song. "Thanks, Rarity!"

The white unicorn smiled. "No problem at all, darling."

"KEEP SCRUBBING, YOU LITTLE FILLIES!" Applebloom shouted at her friends like an angry drill sergeant that had been pranked that morning. "HARDER!"

Sweetie Belle picked up the pace. "Okay okay, we're scrubbing!"

Scootaloo moaned. "We said we were sorry for egging your house, AB! We couldn't help it after Granny Smith gave us those stupid chunks of awfulness!"

"They made my mouth feel funny!" Sweetie Belle chimed in.

"DID I SAY STOP, YOU TRAITORS?!" The two shut their mouths and continued scrubbing the walls, lest they invoke the true wrath of the strongest filly in the class.

Meanwhile, an orange pegasus stallion, a distant relative of the Apple Family, had the displeasure of picking off the toilet paper from the apple trees. He grumbled to himself all the way in his unpleasant task. "....mrmrmr.... stupid Orange family luck..... mrmrmr dumb popcorn balls...." Orange Pudding was not happy with being stuck doing the Apples' extra chores while his own family farm all the way in Mareison was experiencing a slow period.

Even though he was supposed to inherit the Orange orchard in Mareison when he came of age, that didn't stop his pops from sending him to Ponyville until business picked back up on the orchard, or until further notice.

"...probably got kicked off the farm because nopony likes my orange-flavored pudding.... not my fault they don't have better tastes in pudding...."

The pegasus continued to pick off the TP, hoping that the candy at Bon Bon's would at least be half-off once he got off work.

Author's Note

Happy Nightmare Night, everypony! I hope this satisfies your spooky scary tastebuds, because I had to go through a @$#^ton of trouble just to get this chapter out. I had to dump a much more satisfying Nightmare Night epic, put off all of my other work and stories, mess around with my dodgy internet, and so on and so forth. But, it's out! That's something to celebrate, right?

And sadly, Bon Bon's store ran out of the half-price candy before I got off. sigh