Shiny, Staplers Are Not for Eating!

by Black Jesuz

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Slice of Life, Alternate Universe
Length: 932

Twilight Velvet mentions a time when Shiny tried to eat a stapler when he was two. This is a possible way that scene played out. Warning: Cuteness.

Twilight Velvet recalls a time where her son tried to eat a stapler when he was two. Warning: Excessive cuteness.

A little one-shot I worked on this weekend but, never really finished plus I feel like I write too much sad stuff so I wanted to write something with a more slice of life feel to it . So here's the finished product.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-04 03:10:02 UTC

Boys and their food..

Velvet's POV

I sat in one of the worn chairs in our house, watching Shining, who was sitting in the middle of the floor, contently bouncing a ball over and over and over again. I wondered how foals could ever find something that boring so amusing. But I enjoyed a second of sitting while it lasted. Besides, if I watched him, I could take my mind off of other certain things in the house like cleaning or my paperwork or like my lazy husband, passed out in the back bedroom, asleep. I wonder about that stallion sometimes...

Shining giggled as the ball hit the coffee table, sending my paperwork off the side in a flurry of white. Looking at his smile and hearing his laugh, somehow, I couldn't find myself being mad. Children were so cute...

I gathered up my papers, and sat them back on the table. I thought better of it, and grabbed the stapler, stapling them together so they wouldn't fly away like that again. I looked at Shiny, who was still sitting on the floor, looking up at me. I set the stapler back down on the coffee table.

I bent down and nuzzled him in the stomach, causing him to roll over and collapse into giggles. "Don't do that again, Shining. Be careful."

"Okay," he said, sitting back up. He leaned across the table, reaching for the ball again. It was a little out of his reach, so I handed it to him. He gave me a large grin—looking completely adorable with one tooth missing. I couldn't stop my face from stretching into a grin in return.He's so adorable.

As Shiny bounced the ball, I crouched down next to him. "You want some lunch, Shiny?" I asked.

He dropped the ball, and nodded excitedly. Boys and their food, I thought to myself as I stood up, ruffling his mane and walking into the kitchen. I looked around at the cabinets, wondering what I could make for lunch...Hmm wheat waffles?...No, what about..applesauce...no, he hates applesauce. Decisions, decisions...

After a few moments of pondering finally, I settled on generic peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches, and started pulling things out of the cabinets. Bread... peanut butter... jelly... a knife... Spread the peanut butter on the bread...

Suddenly, I heard a wail come from the living room. Shining cried a lot—didn't all two year olds?—but this time it was louder, more urgent. He was in some kind of distress. I felt my pulse quicken considerably. My motherly instincts taking over I dropped the knife into the jar of peanut butter, and sprinted out into the living room.

I saw Shining sitting on the floor, leaking tears like a faulty pipe, the stapler sitting next to him on the floor. There was blood dripping from his lip, and onto his fur Oh, please. Don't tell me he tried to eat a stapler. That doesn't even look like food!

"Shiny..." I sighed, bending down and scooping him up off the floor. He buried his face into my fur, resulting in smearing my coat with blood. I needed a bath, anyways.

I carried him on my back to the bathroom, and sat him down on the counter next to the sink. He was still crying, his hoof going up to his lip, but I kept swatting it away. He'd only make it worse.

I grabbed a washcloth and cleaned his face off, so that I could see his lip properly. There wasn't a staple in it—thank Celestia for that—but he still had a little tear where the edge of his lip must've caught the metal on the stapler. I wasn't a doctor, but I figured it was going to end up scaring. Then again, it was an adorable place for a scar.

I pressed the washcloth back to his lip, and wiped the tears off his face with my hoof. His hooves were still a little bloody where he'd been grabbing at his lip, so I ran them under the faucet too. I put his hoof on top of the washcloth, showing him to hold it, and rummaged inside of the cabinet under the sink. There has to be some butterfly bandages somewhere...

"I'm hungry," Shining informed me from the counter as I stuck my head into the cabinet. Like I said, boys and their food.

"You mean the stapler didn't fill you up?" I said sarcastically as I found the box of bandages and pulled them out of the cabinet. Shining pouted, which looked kind of ridiculous since he was still holding the washcloth to his lip.

"No," he said truthfully. I smiled and rolled my eyes as I pulled out a butterfly bandage. "It hurt."

"That's because staplers aren't for eating, Shining," I reminded him, taking down the washcloth. I pressed the butterfly bandage over the cut, and pressed it down with my hoof.

"Why not?" he asked as I picked him up and carried him back to his room.

"Because they're metal. You don't eat metal," I explained.

"Why not?" he repeated, as I dressed him. I stared at him. Really?

"Because metal isn't good for your stomach."

"Why not?"

"Because it rips up your insides."

"Why?"

"Because it's sharp."

"Why?"

"Just because"

"Why?"

"Do you want to eat lunch or not?"

"Yay! Lunch!" He ran out of the room and towards the kitchen. I made a mental note that if he starts asking questions, bring up the subject of food. I sighed to myself, and followed him out. Children...

...Well, boys will be boys I suppose.