Operation: Get Dashie And Meanie Pants Gilda In A Room Together And Let Them Work It Out Or They Nearly Kill Each Other, Which Ever Comes First

by Rated Ponystar

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Gilda, Pinkie Pie
Length: 2026

Pinkie Pie believes it's time to get Gilda and Rainbow Dash back together as friends, despite hating each others guts. Well, let it be said that Pinkie Pie isn't one to give up. Nor is anything impossible.

Commissioned by: Dashole

Pinkie Pie believes it's time to get Gilda and Rainbow Dash back together as friends, despite hating each others guts. Well, let it be said that Pinkie Pie isn't one to give up. Nor is anything impossible.

Thanks to TheMyth for editing.

Published 2014-11-04 19:20:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-04 19:20:04 UTC

Operation: Insert Chapter Name

Rainbow Dash stared at Pinkie Pie like she had grown two heads. Actually, considering that it was Pinkie Pie, that would be even less awkward. Pinkie Pie had just proposed the strangest and most unexpected thing that Rainbow Dash felt nothing could top it. Not even if Celestia had covered herself in jelly, ran out in the open, wearing a thong, and singing “Winter Wrap Up” with a parade of turkeys wearing ninja outfits behind her could be stranger than this.

“Let me get this straight,” said Rainbow Dash, rubbing her temples. “You want to fix my friendship with Gilda? The same Gilda who was rude to all of us, including you? The same Gilda who decided to throw rotten eggs at my house every mischief night since?”

Shaking her head enthusiastically, Pinkie Pie said, “Yupper rooney! I’m going to make you two the best of buds again!”

“Why would I want to be friends with Gilda, again? Especially, after last time?” asked Dash, crossing her hooves.

“Because you two were once best friends, even if Gilda turned into a jerk. And losing a friend is always a horrible thing to go through. Can you really honestly tell me that you don’t sometimes miss the days you and Gilda used to fly in the clouds? Hang out? Prank ponies? Dress up as the Pony Rangers and go to conventions!”

“Pinkie, we do that last one,” pointed out Rainbow Dash. She rubbed the back of her neck and sighed. “Look, I miss that stuff. We were close... really close.” Rainbow Dash then blushed and started to zone out, staring into nothing with a melancholy sparkle in her eye.

Suspicious, Pinkie then asked, “We’re you... close close?”

“It...it was only near the end of our school days. We broke it off because we both had bigger plans, but those days are long gone,” said Dash, shaking her head. “That Gilda and the Gilda I... cared about, are two different beings. You put Gilda and me in a room together all you’re gonna get is get a fight.”

“But...”

Rainbow Dash turned tail and lifted herself up into the air. “Look, Pinkie Pie, I appreciate it. But what happened between me and Gilda is gone. I wish it wasn’t, but it is.”

Pinkie bit her lip as she watched Dash fly away. She slowly began to make her way back to Sugarcube Corner before she stopped. Her eyes switched from sad to fiery determination as she lifted up her hoof. “Well, Rainbow Dash may have given up! But I haven’t! As Ponyville’s number one friend maker, I’m going to repair their relationship or my name isn’t Pinkie Pie. Which technically it isn’t since I was born Pinkamina Diane Pie, but that’s technical stuff. And if I do lose, I can change my name to Zippy Funny Bunny! I’ve always wanted that name!” Rubbing her chin, Pinkie then asked herself, “Now how do I get Gilda to come over...”

The answer hit her, literally. Derpy Hooves, Ponyville’s resident mailmare, crashed into her from above and scattered the mail she was carrying everywhere. The mail fell on Pinkie’s head and the idea soon click into her brain. Smiling as wide as she could, she got up and ran away. “Thanks for the idea, Derpy!”

Derpy rolled her eyes, trying to find Pinkie Pie. The only thing she saw was Princess Celestia, covered in grape jelly and spreading it around as she ran, singing a song about tulips while making sure everypony could see her thong covered backside. Parents covered their children’s eyes while everypony just stared at the scene. That was until the parade of ninja clothed turkey’s came. Then they just all headed into their houses out of fear.

Derpy just looked at the whole thing, shrugged, and went back to her mail route.

***

Gilda was happy. Strike that she was very happy. Sure, she was stuck back in lame-o-ville where Dash and her dweeby friends lived. But that didn’t matter, she was skipping around town like it was her birthday. Making her way down the road she got a few stares from ponies who either recognized her or never seen a griffin before. Ignoring them, she just smirked and held her head up high.

Twilight, flying above, noticed the griffin and narrowed her eyes in suspicion. Flying down, she landed in front of Gilda and flared her wings. “What are you doing here, Gilda? I thought you made it clear you weren’t interested in us dweebs?”

Gilda smirked and then pulled out a letter she got. “Can’t stay around to chat, princess. I’m getting me a free vacation at a raffle prize. You’re looking at the winner and I intend to cash in on it with some full blown relaxation.”

Twilight levitated the letter over to her and read it in confusion. “Wait a minute, I recognize this hoofwrit-”

Before she could finish, Gilda snatched it out of the air and flew up into the sky. “Sorry, to interrupt your speech, highness. But I’m gonna be late. Why don’t you place that worthless rump of yours on your royal throne and get back to doing boring ruler stuff?”

Twilight huffed as she saw Gilda fly away in the blink of an eye. “What are you up to, Pinkie Pie?”

***

Double checking the map the letter provided, Gilda landed next to an abandoned house between Ponyville and Sweet Apple Acres. It wasn’t even that big, barley two floors and all boarded up. Gilda looked at it with a raised eyebrow, but shrugged. “Probably spent all the money on the prize.”

She opened the door and expected to be greeted by at least confetti or balloons. Instead she saw the pony she least expected to meet looking around with a letter of her own. “Rainbow Dash?!”

“Gilda?!” shouted Rainbow Dash, turning her head in surprise. The two former friends glare at each other and stomped forward, nostrils flaring. “What are you doing here?!”

“What are you doing here?!” demanded Gilda.

Dash growled before showing her the letter. “I’m here to win my prize! I apparently got chosen for this random raffle where I won an all expenses paid vacation. It said to come here and claim the prize at this exact time.”

Gilda raised an eyebrow before showing her own letter. “But I got a letter that said the exact same thing.”

“That’s weird. Who would send us two letters to meet her at the exact same... time...” Dash’s eyes widened. “Oh no.”

Suddenly, a pink blur dashed across the windows before either flyer could think and they were now covered with steel bars. They raced for the door, trying to slam it open, but it was sealed shut tight. Rainbow Dash banged on the door, screaming, “PInkie PIe! Let us out of here!”

“Not until you both make up and become friends again! I’m sure it will all work out! See ya!” said Pinkie’s voice on the other end of the door.

“Are you crazy! We’ll both be killing each other by the next hour!” shouted Gilda, doing her best to claw through the wood, but failing. “Pinkie Pie!”

There was no response and the two huffed before sitting down on their haunches. They eyed each other a bit before scooting back as far as possible. Neither of them said anything and any time the other so much as glanced at the other, they turned around with their noses up.

Minutes passed as both fliers continues to stay still, the ticking of a nearby clock on the wall was the only sound that traveled across the room. Gilda sighed and asked, “Okay. I’ll bite. Why is the hyper dweeb doing this?”

“First off, don’t call her that,” growled Rainbow Dash. “Second, she thinks she can make the two of us friends again.”

“And this is her idea? Forget about what I said. She’s stupid and hyper,” grumbled Gilda, facepalming.

“I’m not pleased about this, you know?” muttered Dash, crossing her hooves. “And can you stop making fun of my friends?! I’d rather do this without giving me a need to kick your butt.”

“Why? Scared you’ll lose?” taughted Gilda.

Rainbow Dash immediately rushed up to Gilda’s face and glared. “I am not scared. But I’m trying to be civil. Unlike you. Besides, I’m not the one who's been a jerk all this time.”

“I’m the jerk?!” growled Gilda. “What happened to us promising to be best buds when we were in high school? What was I not good enough for you? So you decided to replace me?”

“I never replaced you! I just got new friends is all! What’s wrong with accepting that I had other ponies to care about other than you?!” pointed out Rainbow Dash, bopping Gilda on the nose.

Swatting her hoof away, Gilda rolled her eyes. “Gee, I don’t know. Maybe because all you ever talked about in your letters and when I was visiting were those friends of yours. Everytime I tried to get us to do something or talk about the old days you went off again and again about your friends! Never about us! Do you know how much I missed you?! How much I begged my parents to give me the cash to live in Equestria! How much I was looking forward to living a new life with you!”

Dash blinked and her anger quickly faded while Gilda turned around, blushing. “You... you begged to come here? To Equestria? But Gilda, you never beg.”

“Shows what you know,” muttered Gilda.

“And did I really talk about my friends all the time? We’re you...jealous?” asked Dash.

Gilda lowered her head and slowly nodded. “Yeah, so what? Not that it matter now. You hate me.”

“I don’t... hate you...” whispered Dash, rubbing the back of her neck. “I’m just...confused. You never used to be such a...well, jerk. You were cool, but now you're all bossy and rude and...I don’t know you anymore.”

“Look, it’s just.... not easy being a griffin in Equestria. A lot of ponies don’t trust me and I thought if I was with you things would be okay...” Gilda sighed. “But it hasn’t. I screwed it up. Alright, I admit it. And my attitude hasn't helped me make any friends since we parted on bad terms. I miss... I miss you.”

“Well, maybe if you acted nicer, ponies would befriend you more,” Dash said, scooting closer. “Look, I’ll help you out. I wasn’t the nicest pony either, but I’ve changed thanks to my friends. And if you're serious, they can help you. We already made a spirit of chaos nice. I’m sure we can do that with a griffin as well.”

“R-really? You’d take me back? After everything?” asked Gilda, eyes widened.

Rainbow Dash smiled and put her hoof around her old friend. “Yeah, I think I can make a good guy out you.”

“Heh, thanks,” whispered Gilda with a genuine smile. She looked around and blushed. “You know, this place reminds me of that cabin your uncle let us borrow that one summer.”

Dash soon sported her own blush and quickly retreated her hoof. “O-oh, yeah! That was... the summer we... we...”

“... kissed,” finished Gilda, turning towards Dash.

The pegasus stared back as the two realized how close they were. Suddenly, Gilda jumped forward and tackled Dash to the ground as muzzle met beak in a split second.

Suddenly, the door opened with Pinkie Pie, looking annoyed, entered and said, “Okay, so Twilight found out about my little plot and says I need to... let... you... two.” Her eye widen as both of her cheeks went red at the sight of both... former enemies now making the room a lot hotter than intended.

Pinkie slowly exited the house and closed the door. She could still hear the sounds of things heating up before saying, “Well that worked out better than I expected.”

Author's Note

This fanfic was commissioned by Dashole.

If you want to commission me a one shot you would like to see done, please read this post: https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/383069/commissions-for-one-shots-are-now-open