The Troll

by BewhoUr

Victim 1

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"I keep trying to tell you Discord.  You are not dying."

The mare with the fur of the snowy color and the hat with some weird mathematical symbol placed a pon her head looked at me quite distastefully. Her silly pink mane was in a frazzle, her tail flicking back and forth in plain annoyance.  She did not believe me in the slightest!  It was simply dreadful.  Those beady eyes that all doctors seem to possess flicked around the room, as if looking for an excuse to get away.  I only let out another pitious moan and dramatically conjured up a few hoarse coughs.

"But of course I'm dying!" I whispered raspily, flicking a pale blue box of tissues into existence and proceeded to use every single one in the very useless way of simply taking them all out at once and blowing my nose with them in the sound that an accordion would make.  The stupid, whiney, no-fun nurse wasn't amused in the slightest.

"Discord!  You have been in here for three days demanding that we cure you!  I keep telling you, you're not si-" I cut her off, placing a zipper directly where her mouth was.  I then proceeded to place a paw over my nose, as if I was about to sneeze.  I gasped those short breaths that you'll gasp before a hearty sneeze worthy of a geuzuntiht.  I twitched my paw for added effect, breathed deeply, and...

Achoo!

Confetti of the multicolored variety flew out of my nose as I gave a rather weak sneeze that sounded somewhat like a tortured squirrel.  My subject of audience only glared in a manner that told me I was not believable nor impressing her.  My eyes grew big, and I stuck out my lower lip as as I slowly reclined myself like a chair and very slowly fell back into the old, green bed that had been so generously given apon my arrival at this place.  I lifted a quivering paw to place it over my heart, and small red dots started clotting my face.

"I do believe I am getting the pony pox..."

Nurse whatshername lifted her hoof to her mouth, touching the zipper and narrowing her eyes in a way that made them even more menacing.  I half-heartedly lifted a claw and snapped it, the zipper removed from her mouth and replaced with hilariously detailed clown makeup.  I couldn't help letting a chortle escape my muzzle, aside from the fact that I was supposed to be staying in character.

"DISCORD!  YOU ARE IN NO WAY SICK!" The nurse said, pinning her ears back flat against her head and slamming one hoof to the cold tile floor.  It made a noise that rang throughout the small hospital room, and I moaned in a very dull manner.

"Your fit is hurting my poor ears..." I growled feebly, sniffling and