Loyalty Among Thieves

September 14, 2014
8:41 PM

Russian-American celebrity Mikhail Kraminsky was present to open a new shopping mall in Miami today. The mall’s construction was primarily funded by him, and he has described it as being a new way to bring the community of Miami together...

~~~

When the van arrived outside the safehouse, Dallas wasn’t there to greet the others. Hoxton was naturally worried, being Dallas’ younger brother behind the mask, but Wolf and Chains said he was probably just busy with something. They entered without knocking, looking up at the surveillance camera that Dallas used to practice on. In the back living area, the two tables were locked together, creating a single table like a figure-eight without any holes.

Behind it sat Rainbow Dash and Dallas on the floor, opposite but not looking at one another. Two bowls that used to contain oatmeal were between them. “Hey, bro?” Hoxton asked, putting a hand on Dallas’ shoulder. “Everyone’s here. It’s Sunday, remember? Poker night.” Slowly, Dallas turned around and nodded once. Chains pulled a brand-new pack of cards out of his pocket, like he had every Sunday night since they first met in D.C., with the exception of the night they picked up Rainbow.

Slowly, they sat around the table, pulling a few bottles of alcohol from a cooler Wolf had brought. “Hey, Rainbow, what do you drink?” he asked, entirely oblivious to what was between her and Dallas, and by extension the rest of the crew.

She didn’t say anything for almost a minute, and everyone was simply staring at her. Dallas was about to mention how she felt when she said something, too quietly for any of them to hear. When Chains put a hand to his ear, she repeated herself just barely audibly, “Apple cider.” Wolf reached into the cooler, but couldn’t find any. Dallas stood up, excusing himself and walking out the front door.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” Hoxton asked, shuffling the cards idly. “What are you looking so down for?”

“How can you be so casual like that?” Rainbow asked. “You kill all those people, and you act like it’s nothing back here. What kinds of people are you, that you can be so... heartless?”

“Would it help at all if I told you that the police in this country are pumped out of a factory, and have no soul, little consciousness and aren’t really people?”

Rainbow narrowed her eyes at him. “That isn’t funny. Death shouldn’t be a joke. Ever. Killing, even less. And you,” she pointed a hoof at Wolf, “looked like you were having fun killing. Just my luck, to owe my life to people like you.”

Wolf seemed confused by the accusation, and was about to say something in response when Chains cut him off. “What’s Equestria like?” he asked, turning his chair to face her directly.

She wasn’t expecting the question, and took a minute to reply. “Well... I guess you could say it’s peaceful. We don’t really have many major crimes, and the last war was about fifty years ago...”

“Before I was a career criminal, I was a soldier,” he explained. “This country looks pretty peaceful, but there’s a lot of people looking to take it down. I went to a lot of countries where you saw massacres like on that street every day, but of innocent people who simply believed differently to the people in charge.” By that point, her jaw was hanging open, trying to picture the scene. “This world doesn’t have easy solutions like friendship or diplomacy. Most of the time, it’s kill or be killed, and when you live like we do, killing is usually the only option. If you aren’t willing to fuck someone up, they’ll fuck you, and that’s just how life is here.”

Rainbow pulled her mouth closed, frowning. “That sounds horrible,” she finally said. “How does anyone go on living, in a world like this?”

“When it’s all you’ve ever known, it’s a lot easier. How do you sleep without your wings bumping against stuff and keeping you awake?”

“It’s impossible to explain to someone without wings—”

“There you have it, then.” He turned back to the table, and Rainbow sat in silence, pondering what Chains had told her. People kept on living, despite the horrible things that were commonplace. How they did it couldn’t be explained to somepony like her, because her world was just too different. But as she looked at the crew, she supposed that even in a world torn apart by war and violence, there was some level of harmony.

Laughter, at least; Wolf and Chains were laughing at some private joke she hadn’t heard, and hoped wasn’t to do with their escapades. And Dallas taking her in was either kindness or generosity, or both; honesty as well, when he and Chains had told her about their world without trying to soften the blow and let her get hurt for it later. She couldn’t gauge their loyalty, but perhaps that was why she’d been given to them.

None of it made any sense, and she started casting around for something to say when the door opened and Dallas returned, carrying a bottle. “I got you a drink, Rainbow,” he said, removing the cap and passing it to her. “Apple cider, just like you asked for.” Slowly, she took a sip of it, and then sprayed it out over the floor.

“This is... What kind of cider is this? It’s so...”

“Oh, you’re used to soft cider?”

“I didn’t know there was a difference, but the stuff I’m used to isn’t like this.” She took another sip, then added, “But just because it’s different doesn’t mean it’s bad. I dunno, it’s just another thing that’s different in this place.” Slowly, she sucked at the bottle again, and Dallas sat down at the table. “Hey, what are you doing?”

“Playing a game. You ever heard of poker?”

“Yeah, I tried it once in flight school. Could never remember the rules, though. Too many different things to do with the cards.” She looked out of the window, nostalgia overtaking her for a moment. “Mind if I just watch?” she finally said.

“Sure.” Dallas picked up a chair and set it at the end of the table that was reserved for Bain. He’d set up a miniature camera to look at his cards, and used the earpieces to bid despite never leaving his lair. “It’s nice to see you so chipper,” he added.

“What Chains told me, about this world, and this country... If humans can manage to not kill themselves despite violence and suffering, then I can find that strength too. I couldn’t say I was truly awesome if I let it stop me from smiling.” She looked around at the group. “Even if I never truly comprehend your world, or what happens in it, I can survive, and I should be grateful for it.” Falling back into her memories again, she recalled a pony from flight school who had told her that for the first time, after both of them had failed a test. “Celebrate because you’re alive, and because you’ll always have another chance.”

There was silence around the table, the only sound being Wolf gulping down his drink before he put it down on the table and declared, “Well, enough of that heavy shit for now. Hoxtonator, you’re dealing, so that makes me small blind,” he put a blue chip in the middle of the table, “and Bain over there is big blind. Regnbåge, if you would?” He pointed to the stack of chips in front of her. “Two of those blue ones.”

Tilting her head slightly at the Swedish word, Rainbow nonetheless placed two blue chips marked with a 20 in the middle of the table. Hoxton finished shuffling the cards and began to deal them around the table, directing Rainbow to place the cards face-down over a certain part of her seat. Bain explained that was how he saw the cards, and that he’d direct his bids through her. With two cards in front of each of them, Rainbow peeked at Bain’s hand, but then narrowed her eyes. “What’s with these cards?” she asked. “What do those symbols mean?”

“Thought you said you’d played before?” Dallas asked, tossing two blue chips into the middle as well.

“Yeah, but the suits here are all wrong.”

“How many are you used to?”

“Four, but... Not these four. Swords, cups, coins and staves.”

“Oh, that’s old-fashioned cards for you,” Hoxton mused as Chains threw in a red chip, which he responded to by throwing in his cards. “Well, that doesn’t really matter. There’s four suits, and as long as you can tell them apart, you’ll do fine. Besides, you aren’t even actually playing, so what’s it matter to you?”

“Jävlar,” Wolf muttered as he threw his cards in as well, during Hoxton’s ramble. Bain indicated that Rainbow should toss in a green chip, printed with a 10. Dallas repeated the gesture, and laying one card face-down to the side, Hoxton placed three cards in the middle. “Hold on, how does this work?” Rainbow asked.

“The cards in the middle belong to everyone,” Dallas explained as he listed off their denominations for Bain. Bain didn’t start the bidding, but Chains threw in a black chip, which was enough for Bain and Dallas to both bow out and leave the whole pot for their friend. As Wolf picked up the cards and started shuffling, Rainbow threw in a blue chip. “Now you’re getting it,” Dallas smiled as he threw in two.

This time, Rainbow took a peek at the cards herself: a ten of diamonds, and a card she couldn’t make out at all with a pointed black design in the suit and a Q for the rank. Bain thought it was worth raising to three blue chips on, though, which led Chains to fold. The three cards in the middle, she read off as being “K of black pointy thing,” “7 of diamonds,” and “10 of hearts.”

“Those are called spades,” Hoxton deadpanned, “and the round black ones are called clubs.”

“Sure doesn’t look like a spade,” Rainbow said as she tossed in three blue chips again. “At least with the Equestrian suits, you know what you’re looking at.”

“The simpler symbols take up less space, and less ink,” Bain explained as Dallas ‘called’. “Makes the cards cheaper.”

“For that matter, why do you keep buying all these fucking cheap packs?” Hoxton asked Chains as he called as well. “We can afford better cards, you know.”

“And if they’re so simple, then what’s with that fancy design on the K?” Rainbow asked.

“The king? ...Long story, and one that I don’t actually know. It is the way it is, and that’s all I can really tell you.” Rainbow could only nod and accept it, though she still thought it was dumb.

Wolf called and dealt another card to the three that were already down. “J of diamonds,” Rainbow said, tossing in a black 100 chip.

“That’s a jack. The jack, queen, king and ace are the highest cards. Since the names are so long, though, they’re given letters instead,” Hoxton said as Dallas ‘folded’. He and Wolf quickly followed, leaving the hand unfinished again. This time, it was Rainbow’s turn to deal, but since she’d never shuffled cards before, she let Wolf shuffle and deal again for her. He left the deck next to her so she could flip out the ‘river’ cards.

“Hey, Rainbow,” Chains said as he looked at his cards. “Usually we’ve all got stories to tell ‘round here. You’re new here, so all your stories are new. Got any good ones?” All eyes were on her, and though she usually relished the attention, having it from these people gave her a moment’s pause.

Finally, she pulled herself up and started, “Most of the stories I have involve ponies that you don’t know about. They’re my best friends in the world, or I guess, in any world. I know it’s probably hard to imagine that there are others besides me, or that they aren’t all just like me, but...” She paused and cleared her throat, then continued, “But it’d take too long to explain them now. How about the story of how I got my Cutie Mark?”

“Your what now?” Wolf asked. She turned her flank to face him. “Oh, that tattoo on your ass?”

“I’m not sure what a tattoo is, but yeah, that’s my Cutie Mark. It’s a sign of our destiny or our special talents that we usually gain in childhood or adolescence. Everypony’s is different, and sometimes they can be hard to truly understand, but it always helps us to know just who we are.” She looked over the group. Dallas was staring straight at her silently, Chains had his head tilted to one side, Hoxton was rubbing his chin and Wolf was still staring at her flank. “You don’t have those?”

“Uh, no,” Bain said at last. “We don’t get our special talents indicated to us openly. We have to do a lot more work to find them. And sometimes, you have to wonder just what ours would look like. I mean...” The rest of the crew nodded, all thinking about what their own Cutie Marks, or Bain’s, would look like.

“Anyway, one of my old friends in flight school was often picked on for being a bit of a weak flier, and a lot of a shrinking violet. In order to stand up for her, I decided to prove once and for all that her most frequent bullies were all talk and no action, and I challenged them to a race. Well, even though I was about this big at the time,” she held a hoof above the table, not noticing that it was her turn to call, “I actually managed to fly fast enough to break the sound barrier, and that was when I got my Cutie Mark. I’m a daredevil, a loose cannon, but most importantly, I’m a speed demon. That’s what it says about me.”

She looked down at the table sadly and continued, “But there’s something about this world... I can’t fly anymore. And I don’t even know why, but without my wings, I’m nobody. I’m not special, or skilful, or anything like that...”

There was silence around the table, and everyone was looking down, not expecting Rainbow to be morose again. Finally, Hoxton broke the silence. “You were worth two and a half million dollars to somebody despite that,” he said. “Clearly, they think you’re special. Even if we don’t know who they actually are yet, surely you can get your confidence from the fact that they believe in you. I never would’ve made it as a big-time criminal if my brother hadn’t told me I could do it.” He nodded to Dallas, who nodded in return.

“I was normal once, but I became a criminal for my family,” Wolf said. “My startup company only ever had one client, who was stiffing me on payments. When we lost our house, I joined Dallas to hit the First World Bank in order to buy them a new one, and I’ve never looked back since.”

“It takes all kinds of people to keep a world spinning,” Bain said. “Straight people and crooks, politicians and lawyers and taxi drivers, people with too much confidence and people with too little. Equestria was the same way, right?”

“I guess...” Rainbow looked back up at the group and nodded. “Thanks, guys. Even if you’re thieves, and killers, you’re not bad people. Not entirely.” She threw in a black chip unprovoked, without looking at her cards or waiting for Bain’s instructions. Everyone folded in response, and she picked it up along with the blue ones from earlier. “Hey, I’m better at this than I thought.”

“Well, you can only get so far by looking at the cards,” Dallas explained. “If you really want to be good at poker, you have to learn to read your opponents, and know when to lead them on and when to intimidate them out, without them knowing your true strength. Just like a major bank heist.”

“Really? I didn’t know that...”

The rest of the evening was spent giving Rainbow a crash course in poker, with Bain eventually ceding total control of his hand to her. At midnight, the group split up. No actual money changed hands because they were all rich enough that it didn’t matter to any of them. “And we still use the same drill despite that,” Hoxton mused. “Why can’t we get a better drill with all that money?” Eventually, everyone agreed that the drill companies were just out to get them, and went their separate ways.

“Hey, Dallas?” Rainbow asked, when they were alone. “How did you start as a criminal?”

Dallas thought for a while. “Back in Chicago, there were these two mafia families where I lived. I joined one early on, and I quickly rose up the ranks. Eventually, I decided to play them off against each other and take over in the chaos. It didn’t work out, and a hit was put out on me, but I managed to shake it off by going straight. Became the manager of a bank, but they were crooked above me, and eventually I got a criminal team together to help rob it with what I knew. I’ve always been a good leader, so I guess my Cutie Mark would be more towards that than stealing. It’d help me stay undercover, too. A bank-robbing Cutie Mark would just give the whole game up, huh?”

Rainbow laughed at that implication. “Yeah, I guess it would at that. Good thing humans don’t have them, then.”

“Oh, we wear clothes all the time, so they wouldn’t be that easy to see.”

“Yeah, forgot about that... Well, anyway,” and she yawned loudly. “I think it’s about time for bed. Who knows what tomorrow may bring, huh?”

“Good idea. G’night, Rainbow.”

“Night, Dallas.”

~~~

That night, Bain was visited in real life, in a similar way to the first dream he’d had. As he was browsing Crime.net, he came across the purple message box again.

hello again, bain

I have another job for you

What’s this one about?

i would like you to investigate this man:

A picture flashed up on the screen of a scientist who had been in the news a few weeks ago.

he has been doing research into dimensions and teleportation

And you want us to make him stop, or steal his research?

no

learn what he knows already, but do not stop him

A strange offer. What are you willing to pay for it?

he has a large stash of immorally gained grant money

he does not strictly require all of it

Understood. I’ll get it done. Your faithful criminal, Bain.

There was a long pause before the visitor responded:

how do you know that?

It’s a bit of a long story, but I suppose I’ve got time.