"Come on everypony, smile smile smile! Fill my heart up with sunshine sunshine! All I really need's a smile smile smile! From these happy friends of MINE!" Pinkie was singing to herself as she was preparing the cakes' babies for their nap. Her singing voice was truly intoxicating; the babies could not resist the urge to grin as they were being put to bed. They soon fell asleep and Pinkie resumed humming the tune to herself as she wondered downstairs towards the kitchen of Sugar Cube Corner. Pinkie looked around the kitchen when she got downstairs; a sweet aroma filled the air, whatever it was she was starved and the delectable smell was only exacerbating her hunger further. Pinkie didn't want to ruin whatever it was the cakes had made so she decided to make something for herself, what that was going to be exactly she hadn't the slightest. *ding* the oven rang out, causing Pinkie to jump with excitement as she knew what she was going to make, the thought of Rarity saying 'idea' had momentarily popped into her head as well.

"I know!" Pinkie said to herself excitedly, "Cupcake montage!" She then set out, her world moving around her cinematically, at one second she was grabbing a bag of flower, the next cracking eggs, after that mixing and pouring, only moments later she was standing near the oven watching her cupcakes rise till another ding was heard. After what was only a minute later pinkie was icing her cooled cupcakes and setting them on a plate. "All done!" she said as excited as ever, she then grabbed the plate with her hooves lifted the plate in the air and poured the cupcakes into her mouth all at once. As she swallowed the cupcake mass whole she remarked "mmmm, tasty as always Pinkie." After filling up her tummy Pinkie was now on the search for something to do for the day while the cakes were busy, she had already put the babies to bed and they hate being woken up from a nap and it was a nice day out so being inside felt constricting to her. She resolved by taking a stroll around town, "Maybe something to do will find me." she mentioned to herself as she left through the front door.

It was in fact a gorgeous day in Ponyville, it was the middle of spring, birds were chirping, the grass and trees all had their fresh scents, and the pollinating flowers were already in full bloom. Pinkie wandered over to a park bench to sit for a while, she was always moving but even Pinkie Pie liked to relax every so often. "I wonder what Dash is doing today? Her smile is my favorite, but sometimes it’s difficult to make her smile." Pinkie's thoughts as some could predict, began to wander. But, as her thoughts progressed she began to think of the trouble she has getting some ponies to smile. "Some ponies can be so stubborn" she went on thinking to herself with a slight frustration, "It's not like I ask for a whole bunch, just a friendly grin, or even a smirk will do. Ugh, thinking like this reminds me of my birthday last year. Boy I feel like such an idiot for forgetting my own birthday, and not trusting my friends. A lot of that day is such a big blur now...I wonder what I was feeling or exactly what I had said." Pinkie had trouble remembering the day she went cookoo after her after-birthday-party for Gummy attempt had failed. She had vaguely remembered what she said or what had happened, let alone the things she thought or felt. Pinkie felt compelled to figure this out and decided that this is what she'd do today, but she needed to find some place to start. "Where could I even go to figure something like this out? Oh hey wait, I think I remember Dashie being there when I was alone, was I alone? Anyway, I'll need to find Dash if I want to figure myself out, shouldn’t be too hard though, she's always sleeping on a cloud somewhere around here." Pinkie said to herself, a new found vigor for her search inspired her.

Pinkie had searched for a few minutes before she stumbled across a cloud with a rainbow colored tail hanging over it, snoring could be heard when she approached. "DASHIE!!!" Pinkie shouted but Rainbow Dash barely stirred. "Hmmmm" Pinkie said as she wandered over to a nearby trampoline, which she then began to drag towards the bottom of the cloud Dash was sleeping on. "Rainbow Daash!" Pinkie sang to herself as she readied herself upon the trampoline; after a few good bounces her head had poked through the cloud and for a moment she could see Dash drooling on a makeshift cloud pillow before she fell back through the cloud again. When she hit the trampoline she took a deep breath and waited before she popped through the cloud again to shout, "WAKE UP DASH!!!" Pinkie fell back towards the ground as Rainbow Dash screamed, being startled by her rude awakening, and began to fall soon landing headfirst in the well nearby splashing water all over anypony nearby. Dash crawled out of the well and coughed some water out of her lungs, "*cough cough* Ugh Pinkie Pie what the hay was that for?" Dash was glaring at a now soaked Pinkie Pie. "Hey Dashie, glad you’re awake I thought we could talk and do something fun for a little while." Pinkie said, her mane and tail had been flat with water before she shook it dry and it returned to its' normal poofyness.

"What is it Pinkie? I told you I won’t make cupcakes with you anymore, not after that spooky dream." Dash shivered at the thought of cupcakes, but Pinkie didn't seem to take much notice. "No, but now that you mention it I have a serious question." Pinkie's tone had dropped and her usual happy self seemed more concealed. "Oh, well what's up Pinkie? Is everything okay?" Dash questioned shaking herself dry and getting closer to Pinkie to comfort her. "Yeah its okay Dash, I'm fine, I just wanna ask some things about my birthday last year." Pinkie said reassuring her friend, Dash had become slightly less concerned but her dream reappeared in her mind at the thought of how Pinkie had acted the year before causing Dash to shiver yet again. "Oh yeah, uh okay, what do you want to know?" Dash recollected herself, wanting to be there for her friend. "Well I just wanted to know what you remember of me from that day, I mean like the way I acted or the things I said because I don't remember much of it." Dash had to think a bit about Pinkie's question, she didn't want to say anything that might offend her friend. "Well the most obvious difference was how you looked, I didn't like it, you were darker and your mane was down, kinda like it was when you were wet earlier" Dash said remembering her confrontation with Pinkie that strange day. "Oh, really? Like when I was wet?" Pinkie said surprised. "Uh, yeah, you were acting weird that day, I was really worried..." Dash said relaying what she remembered to her friend.

"When I showed up to your place you had been talking to yourself, well I think it was yourself, you had random objects sitting on stools and you made them talk to you. The whole situation was really disturbing but what really got me was the look in your eyes, they were wrong but they seemed natural, like you were supposed to be like that. I forced the thought out and made you come with me in hopes of getting you back to normal." As Dash finished the thought Pinkie began to think about what she had said. "Okay, thanks Dash, I need to go now, see you later." Pinkie said to her friend, Dash could see that Pinkie needed to think on this, "Alright, see ya Pinkie." Dash flew the opposite direction of Pinkie who was headed back to Sugar Cube Corner. "Natural? I wonder, so much of my life is a blur, I don't remember how long it's been sense I've seen my family."

Pinkie had stopped walking, she sat on the ground, she had stopped in an ally, a short cut to Sugar Cube Corner from where she was, and she continued to remark to herself. "What were their names? Why can't I remember my own father's name, I remember Granny Pie, my mom, Sue or Roxy? My sisters, one was, Inkie, Yeah! I saw her I think; she might have changed her name. My other sister, I... I don't even have a clue. But my Father? What in Celestia's Equestria was his name!?!" Pinkie was pounding the ground with her hoof in frustration, when, unfortunately, it came to her. "Clyde... his, his name, that name..." Pinkie began to cry intensely, sobbing, soaking the ground around her feet in tears as she remembered what she had forgotten long ago. "That was... *sniff sniff*... before I left, they said... that it wasn't my fault... but... but it was!" She continued to cry, but her tears had dried out into saltiness on her face. "When... when did I leave... why don't I remember... how did, the Cakes, how long..." Pinkie stood up, she looked around, her sense of time as she realized was bleak, it was darker out then it was when she left the bakery, or was it? She had no clue; Pinkie wiped away the rest of the tears and proceeded on her way to the bakery. She knew the Cakes had been busy but this was important, she knew that they would understand.

Pinkie entered Sugar Cube Corner; the Cakes were running here and there, they had been commissioned to make another MMMM for a large party; they didn't seem to see Pinkie come in. "Hi Mr. and Mrs. Cake, would you guys mind if I asked you something?" The Cakes took notice to Pinkie but they continued to run about their kitchen. "Oh hey there Pinkie, What is it you wanna ask?" Mr. Cake said frantically looking for ingredients in a cupboard. "Well, I was wondering if you could tell me when and why I came here to stay with the two of you." The cakes seemed to pause for a second but then they resumed running about the kitchen, not as frantic as before. "Well Pinkie, we had you move in a few years ago, six years I believe right honey?" Mrs. Cake said to her husband who responded, "Yeah, or five maybe." "Yeah, we had you move in with us because you seemed very nice, and you were an exceptionally good baker too." Mrs. Cake finished, Pinkie was sitting in the middle of the two ponies going back and forward through the kitchen.

"Where did you find me?" Pinkie asked, curious as to the phrasing of what Mrs. Cake had said. "Oh, well, you were in the Ponyville general hospital. They had you in as a patient but you worked in the kitchen for them, you don’t remember that?" Mr. Cake had picked up the somewhat uncomfortable question; Pinkie grew even more confused. "Why was I in the hospital? Was I in some sort of accident?" Pinkie asked quizzically. "Well from what the doctors told us, they had reported you as possibly mentally unstable, they said that they found you on the edge of a rock farm crying with a large grin on your face." Mr. Cake said to Pinkie, he had stopped running about and was now looking at Pinkie who was sitting with a particular look on her face. "I need to figure myself out; I don't think I can focus on anything until I find out what happened to me." Pinkie said standing up straight, putting on a stern and dutiful look. "Well okay Pinkie, be sure you stay safe, we don't want anything to happen to you." Mrs. Cake said, worried about her friend, Pinkie didn't seem to notice what Mrs. Cake had said, she was heading out the door with a sort of missionista mentality. "I do hope she stays safe." Mrs. Cake said as her and her husband sat with worried looks as Pinkie left the bakery.

As Pinkie wandered toward where she thought her old family rock farm was, she tried to recollect what had happened to her father. "I... it's so hard to remember, it was... after, after I got my cutie mark. I think by that time Granny Pie had already passed, I wanted something, it was so hard to notice... but what, what was it I was trying to notice? Ugh, my dad died and I can't even remember why, I remembered earlier!" Pinkie became aggravated with her inability to recall what had happened in her past. "I... I... I killed him." she stopped for a second and looked at the ground before continuing on her journey. Tears had started coming to her eyes as she remembered the day her father had died. "It was such a nice day; I woke up and knew that all I wanted to do that day was make my dad happy. Everything went wrong, so... so wrong, he wasted away, but why? He looked so happy but..." The rest of the thought was too sad to think about but she was aware and her sadness was not held back, Pinkie was weeping as she walked closer to the place she once called home.

She passed over a small hill; she was quite a ways from Ponyville at this point, seeing as though it was not quite visible over the horizon. Once Pinkie had reached the edge of a large plain shortly after losing sight of Ponyville, she had found it, her old rock farm, and her old home. She began her way toward the farm house in hopes that someone was home, she could not help but think to herself as she walked through the field of rocks. "Looks like somepony hasn't been doin their job around here. Or have they? What did we do on this farm, who farms rocks?" Pinkie laughed a little to herself, this was good, and she needed to lighten up a bit. Pinkie proceeded towards the farm house, she walked up onto the front porch and was about to knock but she decided to listen for noises coming from inside first. Not a peep could be heard, then again not much could be heard around here, and the crickets were louder than DJ Pon3's 2012 omega wub cannon remix. She then went to knock on the door, but as she raised her hoof to knock the door slowly creaked open. "Spoooky." Pinkie thought aloud.

Pinkie took a few steps inside, cautious as to what had made the door open. It looked different from what she remembered, or did it? Something did seem out of place but that could just be the spookiness of the area she was in. There was nothing inside really, it appeared as though somepony had lived there, once, but it was clear that nobody was home. Pinkie looked around, at first in remembrance, but that feeling died quickly from what little she actually remembered, and she soon was looking for any sign of where the rest of her family might have gone. There was nothing, no sign that anybody had moved on from this place, this started to disturb Pinkie deeply. "Where could they have gone, I know they existed there must be something." She thought to herself as she continued to look about her house. She ended up wandering into what she recalled to be her room, there was her bed, some toys of a kind as well as, what are now more tattered from age, some pink curtains flowing in the wind from outside the window. It was very cold in this particular room, while the rest of the house was cool like the air outside.

Pinkie's old room had had an aura about it, she could feel herself shiver at the bone chilling sensation. Pinkie was proceeding towards the window, in hopes to keep herself from freezing in the room, but as she approached she noticed a small scrap of paper lying on the ground. "Hmmm, Dear me?" Pinkie had begun reading what was on the small scrap of paper. "I can't have you destroying this world for your sick abilities and your insatiable appetite. I realize that all I can do is make you forget, make you forget of your powers and put you somewhere you can't hurt anypony anymore. I have left you while you were sleeping and have asked a friend of ours to separate us and to make u forget. Once you've read this it will be too late. Sorry if it means anything. Pinkamena." Pinkie sat there confused as to what was with this strange letter. "I wrote to myself? Why would I do that? And what does it mean forget? How could that work?" Pinkie became frustrated with the note and threw it out the window. When she looked to see out the window she noticed the grave of her father, she began to tear up again until she noticed several other graves next to his, and she leaped through the window and ran towards the graves. Pinkie walked up first to her father's grave which read, "Here lays Clyde Pie, who left us with a smile on his face." Pinkie remembered when they had put him down the grave, though she couldn't remember being sad. The other graves simply had names, "Roxy, Inkie, Blinky" Pinkie was confused; she was trying her hardest to remember what happened when she heard something around one side of the farm house.

Pinkie was in no mood to be spied on let alone have somepony hanging around her old house, she shouted out. "Hey! Who's there?! Come out!" She was walking over towards the noise when somepony came around the side of the farm house. "I was afraid it was you." The figure said as it came out of the shadows. "What the..." Pinkie said as the figure came into view. It was her it was Pinkie Pie but different, her mane was down like it was wet along with her tail. "I am surprised to see you so upset over the ones you so viciously took away from me!" The other Pinkie Pie said a scowl on her face. "What, what do you mean? Why are you here?" Pinkie asked upset and confused due to the situation. "I refuse to tell you what I mean, but as to why I am here, that should be obvious, I'm taking care of the family farm and mourning the deaths of my loved ones." The other Pinkie said not looking Pinkie in the eyes. "Hey what do you mean, why do you I mean I or you know what I mean, why are you talking like that?" Pinkie was losing her control of her thoughts again as she became further confused by the predicament. "That is because I'm not you, you are Pinkie Pie, a horrible monster who kills without mercy, and I am Pinkamena, the one whose life you stole from me!" Pinkamena stood, now crying with rage. "I am sorry I think but how is this possible, I know I do some crazy stuff but this is bordering insanity." Pinkie said, rationalizing the things she still didn't understand.

Things fell silent; Pinkie was looking at Pinkamena for answers she was not willing to give up. "I promised myself that if you came back here I would personally end your life, I don't want to have to kill anypony, but I've made you my one exception." Pinkamena said getting up from her spot at her father's grave which she had kneeled beside. "I... I don't think I understand why do you want to kill me? Maybe I can get you to smile and be happy, and then you wouldn't have to kill anypony." Pinkie said nervous yet enthusiastic to cheer this version of herself up. "You’re sick power doesn't work on me Pinkie, you have taken from me what can't be replaced, and I will never smile again." Pinkamena said approaching the now slightly distressed Pinkie Pie. "But... But I can make anypony smile it's my special talent, other than throwing the best parties of course!" Pinkie said trying to fake a smile. "Enough, you have no power anymore and I'll keep you from hurting anypony else!" Pinkamena shouted as she thrusted herself at Pinkie knocking her to the ground, and smashing her head on a nearby rock. "Ow, ugh my head." Pinkie said getting up and rubbing her head with her hoof, when she began to feel very strange. "No No No!" Pinkamena shouted backing away from Pinkie. The migraine shouting through Pinkie's head began to shift to pleasure as all her old memories came back to her.

Author's Note

Labeled as alternate universe because this was written long before season 4.