No More

by BloomBoy06

Rating: everyone
Tags: Flash Sentry, Random, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 2245

Celestia has had enough of what's bothering her, and despite her best attempts, can she dodge all these problems of here?

Celestia is just trying to enjoy a rare day off for a princess. Sadly, her life is not letting her have the rest and relaxation she is hoping for. Can she dodge these obligations and finally have a calm day?

This was inspired by a "princess" pun and I am sorry.

Published 2014-11-10 02:50:09 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-10 02:50:09 UTC

Yet Somehow More Still Comes

Celestia closed the doors, and shut off the television. She didn’t want to see any more of it. Everything she came across was infuriating her further. No more, she vowed, but she swore she would always hear it, always ringing in her ears, always within her sight. She decided to open up a book instead. It had been a while since she’d read Daring Do and the So-Called Final Crusade, and she figured she’d put that Hearthswarming present from her protégé student to use. She skimmed the pages where her bookmark was to ensure she wouldn’t reread anything.

She didn’t get far, however, before there was a tapping knock at the door. It was a shame, she had only just gotten to the griffon army plotting the theft of the alicorn amulet, but alas, dignity needed to be saved through all faces; it was a young adult novel, after all. As she quickly used her magic aura to hide the book on the bookshelf, pages facing outward, she calmly replied to the other side, though via agitation, “To what would I owe the honor of the patron on the other side?”

The tone was a little more snappy than the armed guard would’ve liked, so his answer emphasized his concern, “um….breakfast…?” he fumbled his words before expanding upon the reply, “you, um...well there was…it is a little later than usual, sorry about that.”

The regal alicorn opened up the door for the yellow pegasus, who had pushed a cart full of croissants, muffins, and other pastries, as well as a bowl of Applejack’s Special Cereal and a small glass of water, to give the breakfast a light feel, “My apologies, Mr. Sentry,” Celestia conceded, “I’ve just been feeling on edge lately...you know how it is this time of the year.”

“I suppose so,” Flash conceded, as he rolled the cart beside the bed, “I wish I could help out more on that, I’m almost finished with my first year in the guard, so hopefully I’ll have more of a security duty, rather than an aesthetic position, or ‘bed and breakfast duty’. No offense meant, your highness, but-”

Although the white princess picked up an apple turnover, she withheld eating to interrupt his thoughts, “I completely understand, the greatest soldiers start off with the most humble of positions. However, I do admit I’ll miss you once you do transfer your duties to the next Royal Guard cadet.”

Flash crossed his forehooves in a show of modesty, “It’s not like I’m leaving the guard, I may even accompany you in the future at some point.”

She chuckled at the thought, “Just promise me you’ll have more of a role in guarding anypony important than before.”

The left field comment forced the guardspony to remove his helmet, unsure if it muffled anything of importance that was spoken, “Come again? I don't recall ever-”

Celestia realized no common pony in the Equestrian universe knew about the world beyond the mirror; it was better to try and play off the point rather than explain it, “Sorry, it was a small inside joke that I share with my wonderful friend and student; you’ve met Twilight Sparkle, right?”

While the stallion wanted to be formal and keep his headgear on, he knew Celestia was ruling a more relaxed country, and there was no need to wear the formal attire all the time, “I mean, I’ve run into her a few times.”

A smile crossed the princess’s face, warming up further to the guard’s personality, “excellent, and how was she?”

“Well….I don’t know…”

Now it was Celestia’s turn to twist her head in confusion, “pardon?”

“I...I actually ran into her twice...once she fell over, or at least once.” He tried to amend his point as quickly as he could, “Don’t worry, she’s fine. That was over a year ago,” as if that would quell any concerns.

“She’s been through worse, believe me,” Celestia did her best to calm the guard, but in the meantime, taking a notebook from her nightstand, and scribbling a few notes down in quill: Step One: Twilight Sparkle + Flash Sentry; Step 2: [after some heavy contemplation, she left this blank intentionally, unsure of what to put, though she was sure it would be filled in later] ; Step 3: Profit for all of Equestria.

“As much as I’d like to join you,” Flash emphasized, but unsure if he wanted to know about what was being written, “I should be on my way. I actually need to do some combat training before they let me take care of ‘real’ guard duties.”

Once Celestia finished the turnover, she bid the stallion farewell, “Don’t worry about the cart, I’ll have somepony else take care of it once I finish eating. Take care, Flash Sentry...oh, and could you please close the door on your way out, I’m trying to keep out all the-”

“Say no more,” Every guardspony knew why Celestia was so uptight about security this time of year, “I’ll do my best.”

However, as he exited the sun princess’s bedroom, another pony of less importance, but equal problems, decided to enter, “Glad I could catch you when I could, dear princess….mind if I could interview you again?”

Of course, it was Secret Scoop, a deep purple newspony who was swinging her onyx tail in a sly coaxing. Celestia knew she was not going to make an easy exit, so she figured playing along would suffice for now, “I suppose I have some time for a small conversation.” It wouldn’t be long before she would be spotted; if a visit wasn’t cleared, as an event would, it was basically trespassing.

Scoop’s cutie mark was a question mark upon a notebook, which Celestia took as tracking those ‘anonymous sources close to the princess’ again. “Thank you for making this visit a little easier this time,” snarked the unicorn with a sly grin.

“Happy to oblige,” Celestia lied, but smiled to hide the truth.

“I suppose I’ll ask a simple question to start off everything,” began the mild inquiry, “With the Elements of Harmony essentially gone, does that mean you’ll now be responsible for any of the misfortunes that happen in Equestria?”

It was questions like these that would make Celestia crack if they were asked too often. There were other duties around the kingdom that needed her attention, and on what was supposed to be a relative off day - aside from helping raise and lower the sun - and she would have no more such annoyances.

...after she diplomatically answered the inquisitor, that was, “Well, the spirit of the Elements were now held by the Elements of Harmony, which you’ve somehow dubbed the ‘Mane 6’. While they were crucial to our national wellbeing, the spirit of the elements resides inside each of those ponies now, so I am not too worried about that.”

Still in need of help, Secret Scoop wrote in her notebook. Celestia took a heavy sigh, knowing all too well the newspony wasn’t being completely accurate. But then again, what do you expect from someone writing for Pony Magazine, “So, I guess what readers want to know about now is about Discord. He went from statue, to chaos, to ‘reformed’, then chaos again and ‘reformed’ again? How are we supposed to believe anything that comes as a positive out of him?”

Aha, the alicorn thought to herself, seeing a decent opportunity for a jab, “You see, it’s kinda like how you portray yourself, Miss Scoop. There are those moments of glamor of yourselves, but sometimes your hot head overcomes your desire to do well,” Celestia chuckled a little, proud of her comment toward a more polite enemy.

Secret returned the chuckle, but wrote down, Loverboy syndrome: Doesn’t want to see the bad in him, and although her tone remained level, she wanted her jests to rise above those of the princess, “I suppose there’s one more question, shall we be expecting any royal foals soon?”

Celestia began to answer the question, unaware of the context, “I haven’t heard back from the Crystal Empire on when their fo-”

“No no no, Celestia,” Scoop interrupted, “I meant in Canterlot.”

At first, she wanted to ask what was meant, but once Celestia worked out the thought, she clocked her hoof into her face and mumbled, “merciful Starswirl, don’t tell me you’re gonna ask me that again.”

“I know you’re eternal Celestia, but that doesn’t mean you can dodge these questions forever,” her magenta, magical aura prepared to write the summary of anything that would’ve been said, “a princess is nothing without a prince, and it’d be a shame if-”

“Luna has returned, recall that? And she would be next in line. Which reminds me,” Celestia diverged, “I’ve been meaning to celebrate Luna’s birthday next week. What should I get her?”

“How about some bee-”

“CAKE WILL SUFFICE!!!!!!” the booming voice screeched, pushing the bedroom doors further open, knocking the reporter down, but only mildly discomforting Celestia’s mane.

“What did I tell you,” the white alicorn declared, “Equestria’s fit if I ever go down.”

Scrambled on the floor, she picked up the notebook, and scribbled two words down with her own hooves: no comment. “If…..if you don’t have any more to add…..there isn’t any more reason for me to stay,” and as she got up, she gingerly began walking out the bedroom, being respectful enough to close both doors before exiting the premises.

The elder sister clenched a hoof close to her chest, breathing in, and then exhaled as she extended her hoof out, “Has it been an exhausting day?” her sister asked.

“I just haven’t been able to escape anything today,” Celestia vented, “I think I need something else to curb my mind.”

Luna pondered the thought for a few, unsure of how to console her sister, until she focused her gaze on the console by the TV. The P-box system seemed untouched in a good long while, and she was keen to start something up, “I’ve been meaning to beat you in that ‘Tribulations’ game, if you would be up to it, that is.”

In relief, Celestia took a prolonged sigh, “I’ve been meaning to get my winning streak against you up to twenty-five anyways, as long as you quickly put the game in and put it on the right channel.”

Staring at her sister longer than may have been necessary, she used her blue aura to grab the remote, pressing the power button to start up the television.

She immediately dropped it after noticing what was on.

It was a yellow stallion, or at least it would’ve been if anypony could see it beyond the white sheet he wore. He also sported a green, blue, and pink colored ‘mane’, which was simply multiple strands of thick yarn. Worst of all, he was dressed up as Princess Celestia. Even worse than that, he was trying to sell furniture.

The pitch began in quite the usual annoying fashion, “Fillies and Gentlecolts, Mares and Stallions, it’s that time of the year again!!!” Celestia hid her head in the pillows, hiding under the covers until the commercial was over, but pictures of beds, sofas, chairs, even a few quills sped across the screen during his speech, “Our wonderful Princess Sale-estia has returned! Right here at Discount Warehouse’s Warehouse Discounts. You’ll find all your mattresses needs at AT LEAST HALF THE PRICE OF THE COMPETITORS!!!!” Luna was too dumbfounded how he could convey himself so loudly over a standardized television volume, “So come on down!!! The store will survive our wrath, but not our sales! So come on over to Discount Warehouse’s Warehouse Discounts’s Sale-estia Hearthswarming Sale-abration!!!! We’re right on the edge of Fillydelphia and Appleoosa, and nopony will be an Apple-loser after coming to Discount Warehouse’s Warehouse Discounts.”

After a small pause of time, Luna calmly, but forcefully, went up to the TV, and turned it off. Celestia, having heard the pause and the television’s closure, rose from the bed, and approached the trauma box. Too frustrated to use magic, she grasped it with her hooves, and without a struggle, heaved it out a nearby window, where it fell down a dozen or so stories, and smashed onto the ground in more pieces than sand in a sandbox as some of the projectiles clinked against the armor of guards standing at the entrance to the castle.

Luna tried to lighten the mood of the situation, “I’m…..guessing that means we’ll not be playing any games soon….?”

To Celestia, it was to no avail, “No more. If there’s one thing I hate more than my likeness being used for those commercials, it’s all the annoying puns that come with it, which I hear so much from my subjects. I think I...I may need to relax a little more before I need to help you with raising the moon,” and Celestia trotted to her bed, pulled the covers over her - despite the morning hour - and proceeded to try and sleep it all off.

“Understandable,” and the princess of the night opened the door, prepared to depart her sister of the day, “If it is any consolation,” she commented before closing the door, “I did find that commercial absurdly annoying, too.”

Author's Note

I hope I haven't been too rusty, it's been over a year since I've written anything (or at least published anything on this site).