And that's why Rarity should just keep her mouth shut. "Oh dear! They're back! They're always back! And will back again. Will it never end?"
Rarity sighed. The eyes were back. She wondered what her punishment for being herself would be this time: what she held as wrong that would be hit over her head over and over until she called it a goodness. Or what goodness she held dear or tried to share with others, that she'd have rubbed in her face till it was declared it should ONLY be considered a goodness for her (maybe, if the eyes were feeling too lazy to have it be a wrongness for her too).
She wondered what humiliation she'd be made to endure until she loved it this time.
On the rare occasion the eyes couldn't figure out a way to twist a wrong into a goodness or a goodness she cherished into a wrong, it would aways have her turn out to be a hypocrite of the highest (or rather lowest) caliber. As guilty if not more guilty of the behavior as those she had pointed out were harming and degrading themselves and others with.
Then there was, Rarity shuddered, when the eyes were here, and the way she acted towards her friends, and the way her friends suddenly acted towards her, making Rarity sick to her stomach, taken over by wants and desires that were not their own, but act as if they couldn't be anything but.
Rarity had to stop herself from crying as she remembered how the eyes had made her act at times towards Sweetie Belle. Hurting her in ways that gave Rarity nightmares and the royal guards would come and drag her away for the evil deeds.
Though she'd wake up in the morning in her own bed, the eyes would be gone, and it was like none of it ever happened, and she'd try to lie herself that it had been a nightmare, it never worked. And each time, the eyes figured a new way to make her hurt Sweetie Belle.
Rarity remembered when the eyes hadn't been here, and she had been living her normal life. While Rarity believed that all ponies somewhere inside wanted to give the best impression they could to their friends and fellow: deep down Rarity had been surprised that there hadn't been any ponies bristling at her idea of 'Small Town Chic' theme for Ponyville's anniversary celebration. After all, Ponyville had been founded by earth pony farmers, had a ban on unicorn magic for Winter Wrap-Up, and wasn't known for caring about presentation. (Her parents, while loving, thought she was a little crazy for setting up her dress shop in a town where the local spent most of their time naked instead of in say Canterlot).
Then the one and only Trenderhoof came into town, fascinated and excited by the small town life, and fell in love at first sight at Applejack, as oblivious to Rarty's advances, as Applejack was confused and befuddled by Trenderhoof's.
Rarity's response, was to reinvent herself to be the kind of girl that Trenderhoof clearly wanted to be with. Applejack objected to Rarity's change in style and attitude.
Except . . . Applejack HADN'T been upset Rarity wasn't acting like herself, Applejack HADN'T been trying to help Rarity be herself, Applejack HADN'T been trying to keep Rarity from being something she wasn't.
Applejack HATED the high class life with every fiber of her being. Rarity and Applejack were complete opposites at both how to do business, what was polite and what wasn't, and how to best handle family. And it seemed, with or without the eyes present, the world was determined to rub Applejack's superiority to Rarity in her face. Applejack's wisdom always seeming to surpass Rarity's on well, anything.
No, Applejack had been upset only because Rarity was presenting a stereotype and a cliche of Applejack's lifestyle, nothing more, nothing less.
And Applejack, trying to get back at her, and to throw Rarity's behavior in her face, decided to act the part of 'Applejewel'. Except . . . she hadn't been a cliche fashion plate, Applejack had acted every bit the proper and beautiful lady she was trying to parody. Perhaps that Manehatten high society training had stuck with Applejack far more than she dared to admit.
Applejack had always been more beautiful than Rarity: as a mare with a sense of details and aesthetics, Rarity couldn't deny this anymore than she could deny when comparing the artistic merit of two different dresses.
Rarity spent countless hours on spa trips, make-overs, and countless other details to have the beautiful facade she did over the incredibly plain and unexceptional middle class mare she really was.
Applejack unwittingly hid her natural beauty well underneath all her sweat and grime from her daily hard work, but there was no way in Tartarus Rarity couldn't notice. She knew Applejack didn't care for beauty, no more than she cared for music, in spite of the beauty hidden underneath the farm dirt, and the lively music she could create with a fiddle with barely trying.
Even her normal life seemed excited to toy with her. She admitted her friends had suffered as much misery on the night of the Grand Galloping Gala as her, (and had all had their hooves in the massive amount of property damage that Celestia had paid out of her private coffers for), but to have her Prince Charming turn out to be the most revolting stallion on the planet . . . it felt like somepony had been dead-set on destroying Rarity's ideals, to grind them into the ground until they was nothing left. At least she knew Blueblood treated most of his dates the same way...but then why had she conveniently never heard tell of it?
She enjoyed Spike's company to be sure, but his fantasies were as doomed as her own seemed to be to be with Mr. Right. By the time he was a man, she'd be in a rocking chair.
It seemed the ultimate joke on her life even when the eyes weren't there to rub it in her face: whenever she desired something, it would always fall in the lap of her friend who hadn't desired it in the first place.
Applejack had no interest in falling in love, but Trenderhoof fell for her.
Fluttershy HATED being in the spot light and being a model, but Photo Finish made her a star.
Twilight Sparkle, oh Twilight Sparkle, all she wanted was to learn and be with her friends, she couldn't have cared less about power or authority, or prestige, and she was the one who had become the new Alicorn Princess of Equestria.
She remembered the polite lie she had told, that 'those wings were too hard to accessorize' for her to want a pair. When her every words and action besides had screamed otherwise.
She remembered when she had been given a Celestia send, a chance meeting with Fancy Pants, and had in a day become the new pony in Canterlot to be noticed and the trend setter. She had made a huge splash and had been proud of it . . . And of course had to lie or keep a lid on her town of origin that she had never felt at home in. And of course she was made to reveal the truth when her friends showed that nopony had ever had the courage to tell Celestia's apprentice that her dancing was horrible, and her other friends made a mess of Canterlot second biggest social event. Rarity might not have been the Element of Loyalty or Honesty, but at the end, she stood up for her friends. And Fancy Pants, had chosen to help Rarity.
She had gotten her connections in Canterlot, at the cost of the world making sure she'd always feel horrible and guilty for how she got them, to make sure that her satisfaction and accomplishment would always be tainted.
At least her contract with Sapphire Shores went off without a hitch, and had at least that one time, shown her friends that her guile and strength wasn't all in show, and she had gotten some restitution out of the renegade Diamond Dogs for good measure for them kidnapping her to begin with.
But even when, the one time she had chosen not to stand up for her good tastes and sensibilities, the one time she decided to simply go along with what others wanted and her friends thought was good and nice, it had still backfired spectacularly. She had made the dresses her friends wanted, she did her best not to complain or argue too much with them about the changes they made every minute, overloading her with details and contradicting design choices. She had done what they wanted! She had done what they said was good, and she was still punished for it.
THAT TIME her friends' choices in dresses made Rarity a laughing stock and put her reputation as a designer in flames. Until her friends saw what a pathetic wreck she was, and had gotten her the second chance she needed to salvage her career.
Even without the eyes watching. "No matter what choice I make, it's always the wrong one." Rarity sighed.
She wanted to just curl up in bed and wait until the eyes got bored and went away. Who was she kidding? They'd simply set something on fire to get her out of bed, or have her parents drop by unannounced, or any other number of things to punish her for not playing along.
Rarity shuddered and got out of bed. Hoping that whatever the eyes wanted this time she could endure it, and then her life could continue again. At least when the eyes weren't here, she didn't have to dwell on the joke the world loved to play on her.
What she wanted herself instead given to another who didn't want it or outright hated it.
Being a stranger in a strange land in her home town just enough to feel alienated without being given some sort of moral indignation.
Getting what she wanted through blood, sweat, and tears, while others who where handed such things she struggled for threw them back with disgust.
Yes, at least when the eyes weren't here, her mind never dwelled on such things, her mind never thought of such things, she was able to live each day without a thought to the past or future.
She didn't have to think about how the grace and beauty and status she had earned piece by piece the hard way was look upon by everypony else as gratuitous, excessive, blind, and all in all something that existed only to make her and everyone else around her miserable, instead of something to take pride in.
Yes. Rarity was very grateful that when the eyes weren't here, she never had to think about such things.
'So what is it going to be this time?' Rarity thought. 'Do I beat Sweetie Belle until she has to limp to school? Do I skin Diamond Tiara alive and give her as a dress to Sweetie Belle? Do I spend a night with my friends that I need to take several showers after to feel clean again?'
She came down to the kitchen, finding Sweetie Belle there eating breakfast. The kitchen wasn't on fire, so she guessed that meant Sweetie hadn't cooked it herself.
"Good Morning, Rarity!"
"Good morning Sweetie Belle." Rarity smiled. she noticed that, as of this morning, Sweetie Belle seemed to be imitating Applebloom's style of eating. She wasn't sure if that made sense or not. Rarity knew what would happen next, but the was no way except forward, and took the bait.
"Sweetie Belle, please mind your manners."
And here it came.
"But Rarity," Sweetie Belle said at once. "In that family photo album, you were shown to always been messy as a filly."
Rarity resisted the urge to sigh. And she looked, yes indeed, there was now a family photo album on the table that hadn't been there before, but of course, had now always been here. Rarity had to be punished after all for daring to tell Sweetie Belle such things.
In a way she was grateful, that the eyes didn't feel like seeing her hurt her little sister or be a hedonist with her friends today. Rarity wondered if this was how abused spouses felt. To where the pain had become so regular, that when it was lessened or not of the worst kind, for the poor pony to give thanks to the one who had been hurting them to begin with.
At least she knew the theme of her humiliation for the eyes' entertainment this time until it felt it had made its point and left her be until the eyes felt she needed to be put in her place again.
She met with her friends with Sugarcube Corner for a simple get together, it was technically their yearly anniversary of Twilight becoming a princess, but that was just an excuse for them to enjoy each other's company.
And the Cakes had catered an incredible selection for them.
Rarity wish she could say she was surprised when Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie ate like pigs. It seemed the eyes were leaving Fluttershy alone for now. Twilight, a Princess now, and raised by Celestia herself, of course ended up with cake all over her face anyway.
"You know dear, you really should learn to slow down and enjoy what you're eating. You barely taste it at the rate you're going. And with the amount that ends up on your faces instead of in your mouth, it can leave the impression you don't respect the effort the cooks put into the deserts, and that you don't respect yourselves or others if you don't care that it gets on yourself or others with sloppy eating."
That was when a new cake was placed right before Rarity. And her eyes zeroed in it instantly.
Rarity was even less surprised when her own face was head first in the cake a moment later, (reminding her of when her own gluttony had gotten the better of her with no help from the eyes, and she and her friends had spent a month cleaning Sugarcube Corner until it sparkled, including the ovens and basement, then banned from Sugarcube Corner for a year, not to mention paying for the extremely expensive cake she had taken a bite out of).
"You were sayin' Miss Took-A-Bite-Like-The-Rest-Of-Us?" Rainbow Dash grinned showing off crumbs in her teeth.
Rarity knew it wasn't lady-like at all, that it was just letting the eyes win. But she tuned out what her friends were saying at this point. She gave out an apology as she blushed like mad. Twilight, still being Twilight inside, gave out a lecture about respecting others tastes and manners and not nit-picking other ponies just for being different.
Rarity had the relief that the eyes were going for a short work today from the looks of it.
Now that the eyes had made their point, and again, Rarity had been 'put in her place' her friends were allowed to be themselves again.
Rarity knew better than to shudder at the frosting and cake that was smeared into her coat as her friends hugged her for her 'learning her lesson.' She knew the eyes would just punish her more if she dared.
Forced to endure watching her friends act with all the manners of swine for the rest of the precious event for the sake of consistency, Rarity must not have hidden her relief enough from outside view when it was time to enjoy the outside air. Since that was when a truck load of raspberry jam being carried via pegasus tip over and fell on her and only her.
She didn't try to resist as she slump it up with her tongue, of course she enjoyed the flavor, she had to. Far be it from her to DISLIKE having her mane and coat and dress all ruined. That was would be prudish.
She tried hard not to think about how long it would take to get the stains out of her coat, or how it would stain anything she tried to work with including the floor and carpet until she'd had several baths.
Of course her friends were happy to lick her out of her predicament, she was beyond relieved when it didn't go further than that.
The eyes this time seemed rather uninspired compared to its normal punishments, it must have been in a rut.
This time the eyes didn't seem interested in there being a pie eating contest which Fluttershy needed the prize money for, for her cottage. And Rainbow Dash and Applejack due to trying to out-dare each other the night before were too full to help out, and Twilight for whatever reason not being able to take part, and Pinkie Pie . . . being 'somewhere else', leaving Rarity to show her hoggish side and making a complete mess of herself and 'secretly' loving every moment of it, the 'freedom' from her proper lady 'act.'
At least then she could take comfort that she was doing it for her best friend that time.
There was no such thing when there had, out of nowhere, been a proper dinner in Canterlot that Rarity was invited to for ambiguous reasons, and 'random' fate would have Applejack as the only one who could attend with her, the invite requiring her to bring a guest for whatever reason. The reasons and details didn't matter, Rarity being punished for her refinement and standards were what mattered.
Of course, Rarity would make Applejack completely miserable for daring to teach her proper table manners, or for daring her to eat like a proper lady after hating her time with her family on her mother's side that Rarity would have likely got along swimmingly with if given a chance.
And of course, right at the climax, Applejack would break, eat like a hill filly, and inspire all the other ponies there to 'embrace their freedom' and reveal that they had no regular table manners themselves, all being facades, and Rarity being the only one there who ever took it seriously, looking the fool, and being completely alienated. But who cared about that? Rarity would be punished for presuming other ever cared about the things she cared about, and Applejack would be praised for striking out against such 'tyranny.'
Rarity had endured similar scenarios several times already.
Yes, the eyes didn't seem very inspired this visit, as she, and her friends, all broke out laughing, the signature that the eyes were mostly done with her now. Simply going to keep a close on her for a minute to make sure she didn't dare try to counterattack.
Another round of groups hugs. Rarity at least was able to take comfort in that.
She had tried to tell her friends about the eyes before. And each time she had been punished. Usually by waking up in an Equestria that was a nightmarish mockery of everything she knew and loved inhabited by fun-house mirror monster reflections of her friends. Being a total prisoner in her own body as 'she' did horrible things that made what the eyes normally put her through seem like a summer picnic. An Equestria freezing to death on its own prejudice, an Equestria were she was a demon in service of Discord, and they only got worse from there. And only after she could endure no more, and the eyes felt they had made their point . . . would Rarity wake up at the beginning of the day, time having been rolled back to the start, and the eyes making clear Rarity would be expected to play along, or she could go through it again and again until she did.
Rarity had learned not to try and tell her friends.
Rarity had left her friends and dragged herself into the Spa, happy for the friendly faces of Aloe and Lotus, even if it was her business they loved first and her company second, the eyes rarely felt the need to do anything about them.
By the time she had been washed several times, and was finally let into the hot tub and left alone, Rarity finally allowed herself to cry.
The eyes would leave soon. And she wouldn't think about her doubts and fears, her failures, or the way the world loved to toy with her. Just able to enjoy her time with her friends, live her life, and be the role model her little sister wished her to be.
Until the eyes came back of course. Over and over again in a never ending cycle she wished their new Rainbow Powers could wash away like they had Lord Tirek. But that didn't happened.
Rarity enjoyed the warmth of the water and steam against her body as she continued to cry until the eyes were done with her for now.
"Oh my! What was I crying about?! At least Fluttershy wasn't here to see this! Oh well, no sense in wondering. An extra visit to the spa was just what the doctor ordered. A lady should look her best for her friends after all."
