Hmpf, Rarity huffed annoyed, this is what I get for being curious just once. Rarity looked over the strange scene before her and wondered, not for the first time in the last couple of hours, why she hadn’t heeded the advice of her conscience. To be fair; a conscience that sounded suspiciously like Sweetie Belle just doesn’t invokes the faith one normally should have in such things. This is quite the upset of my work order. It simply would not do to fall behind…once again. Art needs time buys one time only so often, lamented the white fashionista internally. The absolute worst part of this strange ordeal was that no pony would believe her. Not even her dear friend Pinkie Pie, who was prone to have the strangest of things happen to her—that on itself is quite a feat for any common Ponyvillian if one considered the amount of strange occurrences since dear Twilight Sparkle had moved in.
Beside the fact that she could not tell in which part of Equus she had intruded unwillingly into, or if it even still was Equus at all, she was most baffled by the inhabitants of this city. Unlike ponies, those creatures walked upright like minotaurs or her dear Spikey-Wikey, were all almost the same coloration that only varied mostly in tone but never really in color and it was all bare skin, no fur, pelt or feathers. As if that wasn’t unsettling enough for the fashionista they also had a face unlike anything Rarity had seen in all her years dealing with many different kinds of acquaintances or customers. It was flat with smallish eyes and pointy noses. On the bright side they, as a whole, seemed harmless enough, even if a bit too excitable for her tastes.
Rarity kept a wary eye on the sheer mass of unusual creatures before, behind and generally all around her, which wore all sorts of absolutely garish costumes. Those costumes ranged from simple, drab designs to horrifyingly crude and explicit perversions of almost anything any sane pony would only witness in their nightmares—it was simply all so cliché. The quality of the fabrics was plain dreadful; never would she, even in her weakest of moments, suggest felt or polyester as a viable option for…well, anything really. The colors on many outfits were something she wouldn’t want her worst enemy to wear in that particular mash-up; green clashed with blue clashed with red. Those twisted abominations were emphasized with ridiculous large bow ties with polka-dots on them and almost ridiculous tiny hats—everpony knows hats have to be large, the just have to. For most of these creatures the saving grace was that they wore either masks or make-up that made it obvious that they pretended to be clowns but the proportions of the beings that wore those costumes made it hard for her to look at them without feeling – not only metaphorically – way in over her head right now. Then again it may just be their uncommon appearance and it simply would not do to judge them so harshly.
Of course, there were more whatever-they-were and not all wore that kind of costume. A favorite seemed to be, by what she guessed, the male populace of this race going as the other sex.
Besides the costumes many things made it clear that she had stumbled, thanks to her own curiosity, into some kind of festivities or celebration. For what exactly she was unsure of but by the amount of clearly inebriated folk she presumed it was a joyous occasion. Many of said individuals had tried to share at least a drink with her. Said drink seemed to be some kind of beer and she declined politely every time one such beverage was offered to her. Honestly she simply was more a wine-pony.
Aside from the creatures in their tacky costumes and the alcoholic beverage that was available in abundance there was a parade with floats depicting mostly crude jokes involving what Rarity presumed to be politicians and their actions. Some of those were even amusing to her, even if she didn’t really know the origins; others were just downright crude or unfunny. Before and sometimes after a float there would be a marching band, clad in uniforms inspired by military. Rarity found it strange but the tunes were upbeat enough.
As soon as the throng of costumed beings behind her allowed it she finally retreated to a more secluded space in one of the darker shadows of house entrances and replayed once more how she had ended up here in the first place.
Earlier that day
The day had started out normal enough, even for Ponyville, and Rarity had sat down to finish a good part of a rather large order from one of the boutiques in Manehattan. While the ordered dresses weren’t the most elaborate of her designs it would pay the bills well enough and after she had finished this order she could focus all her creativity on the most gorgeous wedding-dress for one of her clients but she fist had this quickly becoming tedious work-load to finish. The dresses had to be tasteful and flowing without being to wide. At least she had tricked Rainbow Dash to model for her. Even a lady had one or two tricks up her proverbial, and in her case literal, sleeve that will net her opportunities. In this case an opportunity for a little payback directed at her polychromatic pegasus friend—of course it helped that Rainbow Dash’s stature was the exact same as in the work order. Still, as the minutes grew into hours tedious had become slow and she had made breaks to enjoy some tea or stretch her legs. It worked for a bit but after a while she started to distractedly watch ponies passing by her window. Fate would have it, Destiny was making coffee at that moment in time, that one of those ponies was her good friend Pinkie Pie…doing one of her antics.
For a long time now Rarity herself had often felt in the spotlight of a camera and in some cases even interacted with one in certain situations and while it could be distracting or even uncomfortable from time to time the white unicorn felt flattered and admired because of this. She remembered the first time it became quite obvious to her that she was watched, by what she had no idea, when she had been captured by those ruffians, those Diamond Dogs. While lecturing those mongrels in a very unique way about the fine difference between complaining and whining she had gotten a hold of something she barely could see and only in recollection was able to discern that it simply must have been a camera of some sort. So it came as no surprise that she felt obliged to find out what lay behind those sensations. At first there simply had been nothing, which was irritating because Pinkie Pie seemed to receive the same kind of attention whenever she did one of her antics she always was unable to explain or replicate. But Rarity wasn’t deterred that easily and she kept looking and with time she started to pick up on small oddities, like the time that hoot Trixie had shown up again and had taken Pinkie’s mouth away. That poor dear had been quite downtrodden, while and after the whole situation had been resolved by Twilight. But she had noticed quite the curious thing shortly after Trixie had let. At first glance it had looked as if dear Pinkie would climb through a hole in thin air but Rarity caught a flicker of black shortly before her pink friend had quite literally vanished. The next thing she knew, Twilight started to disappear as well, as if she would walk behind a curtain. None of their other friends seemed to have noticed anything out of the ordinary and she herself had kept quiet about it but had started to watch Pinie Pie more closely. Within a few days it became obvious that Pinkie Pie didn’t realize that she just wasn’t supposed to act in such instances. Watching Pinkie Pie had granted her the ability to make out the cracks in reality Pinkie unintentionally made use of to appear in random places or upside down into the air and other nonsense.
It came as a shock for Rarity that she herself had utilized this exact phenomenon unintentionally as well to get a hold of her favorite couch. It took her only a few more days to finally find a means to not only see the cracks whenever Pinkie Pie did something the others would refer to as Pinkie being Pinkie but also spot them and even managed to get a hold of the ‘curtain’. The she had made the mistake to watch beyond the veil, so to speak, and was shocked, no almost traumatized to find so many, many eyes staring, gazing and looking at her all at once. Most looked friendly enough, were filled with adoration, admiration or simply amused to see her there. It was sad to say but quite a few had had this particular look; the one uncouth ruffians and stallions had shot her many times if she had been at a bar or at a club for a night out with the girls. She couldn’t help it and had let out an unladylike yelp and turned tail and had never looked back at this particular experience.
This time however, she was bored, she was even so bored, that it could give ‘Rainbow-Dash-bored’™ a run for its money and her thoughts had kept wandering back to this strange place with the many, many eyes. At first she had shuddered and shook her head to get rid of that thought but with slow creeping on and on, the thought stuck more and more in her head until she couldn’t quell her curiosity any longer and had decided to give that place behind the curtain another chance—even if it only was to sate her curiosity and to pass a bit of time until she could focus once again. It had been quite unfortunate that her conscience had picked that moment to offer its two bits of advice: namely, to stay where she was and finish her work orders before relaxing at the spa. Rarity, her skill in tuning out the high and squeaky pitch of vocal cords of her younger sister Sweetie Belle unparalleled and honed in countless hours of finally getting work done, had wielded that particular set of skills well or at the very least utilized the next most reasonable option: doing the complete opposite of whatever Sweetie Belle suggested.
Shortly after she found herself conversing with her friend but had no intentions to get stared at once again while exploring that strange place behind the fabrics of reality and decided to use one of Pinkie’s antics as a distraction. That had the benefit to be able to catch up with the pink baker about her next planned parties or if Sugarcube Corner had once more those delectable coconut macaroons with white chocolate topping.
The latter obviously was more important.
The conversation was pleasant, as always, up until Rarity mentioned her interest in those macaroons and Pinkie got off on one grand tangent. Because that mare never could not express herself without using her hooves, no matter if it were two or all four of them, Rarity hadn’t to wait long until she was able to get a grip on the edge of the fabric of reality and slipp through.
It worked out without a hitch, all eyes, even the uncouth ones, were on poor Pinkie. Rarity paused until her eyes had adjusted and set off into the depth of this strange place in a quick trot. She soon witnessed many other holes, cracks and tiny fractures, all giving her insight into other homes in Ponyville, The Everfree, Canterlot and Manehattan. A loud popping sound drew her attention and she saw with horror that Pinkie’s tail-end vanished in the distance from view and that all those many, many eyes started to turn towards her.
What is a pony to do? As unbecoming as it was, the answer was running away and screaming loudly.
In her panicked state Rarity locked her own azure eyes on a larger crack, rushed to it, hoping to come out somewhere in Equestria she would recognize. Destiny, being at this point the more sober one of both sisters, saw that as the opportune moment to let Rarity trip over her own hooves and to let her stumble through the crack with a undignified whinny.
Back to current events
I still can’t believe this is how I ended up here, wherever here may be. Honestly, it wouldn’t even be so bad if I could find a way back but anything I can see right now are legs and a quite dull neighborhood. The designer sighed heavily before she stepped out again into whatever celebration this was. Despite her observations about the alcohol-level of most of the beings around her they seemed all friendly enough and even the few who were a good deal more affectionate ones wouldn’t get angry or in other ways hostile, they just ambled off towards other, more inclined beings. She doubted she would have any trouble dealing with them if necessary but she preferred not to get dirty as it were.
Every time a float would drive by they would throw loads of candy. It ranged from some rather cheap looking fruit bonbons to taffy and caramel and sometimes even little wrapped chocolate bars filled with nuts or other crunchy bits. Pinkie Pie would love those but I shudder when I think about what she would do with knowledge from where I got them…Oh well, I can still share them with her later…when I find a way home.
Having found nothing so far that could show her a path to return to Equestria right now she drifted along with the masses and started to enjoy this as much as she possibly could. Sadly her mood didn’t improve much as her Sweetie-Belle-like sounding conscience once again piped up and offered its opinion, See, I told you so. Stop ignoring me, I’m not that bad, you know. After a short pause it added, Oh, and you should start listening to your sister more, too! Rarity groaned but arguing with ones conscience never brought about any advantages so she resigned herself to pay more attention to her darling lite sister, in baby-steps.
After a while she had quite the stash of candy acquired, had them put away in a plastic bag she had gotten after its drunk former owner had dropped it but she had stopped it with her magic before it had hit the terrifyingly dirty ground. She even had gotten one or two genuine compliments about her ‘costume’, at least she guessed it were compliments. The tongue of these creatures was close enough to germane, which she had learned a bit during a fashion trend a few years back that had vanished before she ever could put her knew skill to use, but there were still enough words unrecognizable. Maybe if it had been a good deal quieter she had been able to get fully what the ones that tried to talk to her were saying.
But, oh well, no such luck.
Rarity was able to make out half of what seemed to be the most common phrase and came from anyone of these creatures in a choir. The part she understood was “…Alaaf!” but she couldn’t catch what came before that exclamation, because it was simply swallowed by general noise and the music. Speaking of the music, if one could call something like that music at all, that blared out of loudspeakers was just atrocious. Not even Pinkie Pie would be able to enjoy such obnoxious ruckus. Maybe if she would be able to make out the words and not only go with the tune it wouldn’t be that horrible but the lyrics were in what appeared to be some kind of dialect that even most of the attendants of the festivity was unable to pronounce properly—those with the highest level of blood-alcohol had the most success in understanding the lyrics.
To put it simply the situation as a whole was quite bizarre on Rarity’s account. Coupled with her rising worry at the thought what her dear sister would conjure up if she was left unsupervised too long and her stagnant progress in fulfilling the given work order she was quite thrilled as the moving part crowd she had been trapped in for quite some time now started to thin out a bit as they came upon a large plaza with a huge, imposing and archaic-looking goatic monument in its center and she was able to step out and away from the throng of costumed beings. She shortly wondered why a good deal of scaffolds and nets were arranged around its higher points but quickly focused on trying to find any point that could give away where she had led herself into or, better yet, how to finally get back to Equestria or Ponyville.
This time she thought she saw a flicker of black that was not supposed to be there. She almost galloped to where she saw this flicker and to her relieve found a small crack. It was quite unfortunate that the crack wasn’t large enough to let her through but at least she knew now that she hadn’t lost the ability to see those cracks at all. None of the partying creatures took notice of her, let alone the crack. That still only left to find another crack that was big enough to let her petite figure and the bulging bag of sweets through.
Out of the highly packed mass of reveling creatures it was easy for Rarity to walk freely and spot places she could use to overlook the immediate area around her. The first couple of tries were rather fruitless. Granted, she spotted many more cracks but all of them were too small—for the bag mind you. With every small crack, fracture or gap her high spirits dwindled away slowly until finally she came upon a crack that seemed to be of the correct size.
Rarity dashed from her spot towards the rip in the fabric of space, reality or whatever-it-was, eager to reach it before it vanished like the hole that had brought you here and finally return to home. That was, of course, before she remembered that a true lady never loses her composure, no matter how dire the situation may be and tried to slow to an abrupt trot that sent her once again tripping over her own hooves, stumbling along until she came to a rather halt by crashing into the wall besides the crack that–she was certain of the fact–suddenly appeared supposedly out of nowhere. Her unladylike “Oof!” swallowed by a well timed chorus of “Alaaf!”
One of the last floats that passed by—an annoying load one at that—threw once more its share of free items and Rarity, still half-dazed from her close encounter with a wall, caught hold of two or three of them out of pure reflex. After she had recovered and ascertained that she wasn’t worse for wear slipped through the crack, which just now started to fade away.
Rarity stood once more in this strangest of places with its many, many eyes. This time around only a relative few pairs of eyes were watching her and seemed complete flabbergasted by her sudden appearance from a place they hadn’t expected. She tried to pay no mind to them, especially the uncouth ones and focused instead on finding a crack that would allow her to return to her boutique, her friends, her Spikey-Wikey and Sweetie Belle of course.
Wandering around would normally accomplish nothing but without any leads to go on where she could find an exit that would bring her to Ponyville she had no other choice as to start walking and trust in her luck to bring her near any exit to Ponyville. After setting off her way led her across many fractures, holes and crack with more or less familiar ponies in their homes or businesses beyond. In one was Princess Celestia nibbling on a dry slice of bread, bemoaning that it wasn’t a cake. Another showed Fancy Pants, talking with Fleur-de-lis in front of a painting. Others showed Coco Pommel, Cherry Jubilee, Ms. Harshwhinny, Cadence and Shining Armor or some grassy field or meadow. Neither of the openings was large enough for her to fit through them and she noted, curiously, that only a minor part of the many, many eyes were locked on those.
After a good stretch of time Rarity finally came across the first signs that she neared Ponyville. There was Fluttershy, having tea with her animal friends…and Discord. Through a crack she saw Golden Harvest working her fields, another showed Big McIntosh selling apples at the market and another showed the start of an adventure of some sort from none other than Sweetie Belle and her two little friends. The majority of the many, many eyes seemed to watch one of those unfolding events. Hmpf, still, there is yet to be any indication of an opening that would allow me to step through. Oh, I do hope that I may find one such opening soon enough or am I doomed to only see my dearest of friends of this holes?
Before Rarity could succumb to the upwelling feeling of despair, there was a sudden tug at one of her arms and then being pulled to a opening that hadn’t been there before a moment ago. She tried to struggle against whatever pulled her to the opening but before she could make any progress she was pulled through. The sensation was unreal to her, going from black with many, many eyes to something pink that felt like a frizzy mass of hair before being unceremoniously dumped to the floor.
It took her almost a full minute to finally find her composure again after gaping open-mouthed and wide-eyed at her pink friend who kept rummaging through her poofy mass of mane and pulled an assortment of random items from it as if nothing was out of the ordinary before finally noticing Rarity for the first time.
“Hiya, Rares! What’cha doin’ there? You were suddenly gone and I thought it must be very important because normally you never leave before anypony is finishes whatever she says but I gueass it wasn’t that important, because you’re back now and I finally can tell you that we once more have the coconut macaroon with white chocolate topping in store,” chirped Pinkie happily, completely unfazed that Rarity had appeared out of nowhere.
It took Rarity a few seconds to recover after being by chance pulled from wherever-she-had-been by none other who had initially awoken her curiosity. She sighed, commiting herself to file this under the ever growing pile that read on its cover “Ponyville is a nice but strange place to live in”.
“Thank you, Pinkie, darling, such a treat sounds wonderful right now,” Rarity answered, giving her friend a bright but slightly tired smile.
Pinkie meanwhile ignored Rarity’s reply and had gotten to poking at the bag. “Wat’cha got there? Is it something to eat? I could really use a snack-y.” Pinkie tried to get a hold of the bag but Rarity quickly brought it to her other side, shielding it with her body then coughed awkwardly.
“I’m really sorry, Pinkie, but the bag and its contents have to be brought to my home first before I’m ready to may share whatever may remains with anypony.” Without waiting for a reply from her friend Rarity started off towards Carousel Boutique, leaving a puzzled pink pony perplexedly behind.
After arriving at her boutique and slipping in she quickly walked over into the kitchen and dumped the bag on a table. She bit her lower lip, not sure what she should do with the amount of otherworldly candy. She had to make sure Pinkie wouldn’t be able to find out from where she got them, then again it was just candy. Heaving a sigh Rarity turned to the bag, peering inside. Her coat turned even more pale at the sight before her: the bag hold two small records, both their covers showing the photos of some scene or other from the celebration. The text at the top of the covers were in bold letters but Rarity was unable to pronounce it. She realized that she must have caught them shortly before she entered the crack that brought her back to the place with the many, many eyes. Biting her hoof she brought both records in their covers out of the bag and set them down on the table, staring dumbfounded at them before heaving a deep sigh. The bag with its assorted candy was harmless in comparison so she decided that no harm would come from giving it to her excitable pink friend. The records, however, she had to keep hidden from anypony else.
After the decision was made, a devilish smirk crawled on her face as her look remained on the records, At least I think I finally got a means of retaliation whenever Vinyl Scratch decides to test her newest track in public.
Author's Note
Wow, ok, I don’t really know what possessed me to put Rarity into the cologne carnival.
What I know is that there are a few instances where Rarity clearly displayed fourth-wall powers. The most obvious one for me is in “A Dog and Pony show” whrere she literally grabs the camera, the next one would be in “Sweet and Elite” where she winks at the audience, because Jet Set and Upper Crust can’t be seen from that angle and of course there a enough other times where she poses for a camera.
In a spur of the moment I decided to write about this, where the cologne carnival came from I still don’t know.
I hope you enjoyed this little random work of mine.
Thanks for reading.
