The Best of Both Worlds
By Kirb and Zeph
Ponyville’s high school was bizarrely quiet in the afternoon.
Usually, there would be some noise, such as students shuffling around or teachers shouting ‘Wrong! Guess again!’ at the students, but in the midafternoon, it would become strangely quiet, almost as if somepony had died.
The silence was broken by the ringing of the school bell immediately followed by the clamor of students. The doors flew open as ponies flowed out, like how a dam would break and water would spill out onto the land below. All of them were chattering, talking to each other, laughing, and doing all of this while practically running out of the building.
After most of the crowd had left, two colts finally left the building. Both were in conversation as they left, carrying their backpacks and other school supplies.
One of them, a white earth pony with some light brown spots along his body, including one on his left eye, bore a large grin as he made his way outside, walking along the green grass. The wind blew through his short brown mane and tail. He wore a red short-sleeved shirt on top of a tan long-sleeved shirt, as well as some gray shorts. He looked at his friend and smiled.
“Can you believe we’re finally out of school for the summer, Rumble?” the earth pony asked in a Cockney accent.
The other colt, a light gray pegasus with two toned dark bluish mane and tail, was wearing a navy blue rolled-up sleeved shirt with dark grey shorts and military-esque boots on his hooves. He nodded, a smile plastered on his face.
“It’s about damn time, Pipsqueak!” he exclaimed, his boots heavily stomping against the grassy ground. “So, with this all over, what will you do in the summer? Special plans?” He grabbed his olive gray backpack and then out a clear water bottle. A few swigs later and Rumble was ready to go.
Pipsqueak looked off to the side, thinking, as his red hoof-sneakers moved along the grass. “Well, Mum’s tryin’ to save money this year, so we’ll be staying in Ponyville. Oh, except we got tickets to see Van Haylen in concert in Canterlot, a month or so from now. But ’part from that, just staying at home, playing video games, the usual business. And you?”
He stood about a head shorter than Rumble, and his higher voice and slight, soft features showed that he was younger than Rumble.
“Ah, well Thunderlane wants me to go with him on his usual month-in-the-mountains tour… you know him. Besides that, I’ll be going to the Waterworld in Manehattan! I also plan to bring a fillyfriend with me!” He put the bottle of water away. “Though I gotta find one first.”
He frowned. Even though he was a good-looking colt, he wasn’t exactly popular. He was too nerdy for the cool guys, and too cool for the nerds.
It was a peaceful day in the park as the two colts walked down the road. Couples sitting under trees, ponies having picnics, fillies running around. Some were even swimming in the nearby pond, laughing and splashing each other with water. All in all, a beautiful summer day.
“Aww, don’t worry, you’ll find one!” Pipsqueak smiled. “And if all else fails, I’m sure Scootaloo would like to go with you. But hey, any prospective interests?” He wiggled his eyebrows.
In reaction, Rumble rubbed the back of his head. “Yyyeah, about that… not really. I mean, I’ve tried my chance with almost every filly in the school… even at some outta school… but… you get it.” He sadly sighed. “And Scoots and I are just friends.” He shook his head slowly. “I don’t get it, how does Thunderlane get all those marefriends?” It was a rhetorical question, of course; everyone knew his older brother, Thunderlane, was the biggest womanizer in the town.
Pipsqueak nodded. “I know how it is with fillies, believe me. Well, bugger. But hey, Mum told me some good advice!” He then walked right up next to Rumble, and spoke to him, looking at his purple eyes. “Sometimes the best answer is right in front of you, mate.”
“Huh?” Confused, Rumble began to think. “Right in front of… is this some kind of conundrum?” he asked, clearly having no idea what Pip meant, and also taken aback by Pip’s weird change in behavior.
Pip backed away and returned to walking. “Ah, nothing.” He looked away, blushing. “Lovely day today, isn’t it?” He went silent.
Now even more surprised, Rumble stared at his friend for a solid twenty seconds, then shrugged. “I guess,” he murmured, trying to think of what else he planned to do in the summer. “Uh, anyway, Pip, I’m not sure if Scoots will come; if she’s out, then will you come with me to Waterworld?” This was a valid question; a colt couldn’t just go there all by himself!
Pip looked back up at him and shook his head. “I’m terribly sorry, but I don’t know how to swim… never learned how. I would if I knew.” He looked away.
“Aw, come on!” Rumble cried out, putting his hands on his face. “How could you not know how to swim? There goes my summer…”
Pip shrugged. “Sorry, never learned how. I’m not like you; pegasi are natural born swimmers, y’know.”
“Mm-hmm… huh. And don’t you want to actually learn how?” Rumble asked his friend, getting an idea as he saw a filly jumping into the small pond nearby. “There’s a pond right here, I could teach you!” he offered, regaining his previous good mood.
Suddenly, Pip’s eyes got wide, and he backed away in surprise. “Um, no, no no no, hah, can’t do that, now can we? Um…” He looked at his wrist. “Oh, will you look at the time? Bloody hell, I’m late! Mum wanted me back at home by now, so, um, off I go!”
There was no watch on Pip’s wrist, but before Rumble could remind Pip, he quickly trotted off in the direction of his house. “See you soon, Rumble!”
“Uh… seeya?” Rumble replied, but Pip was out of earshot by that time. “What the heck got into him?” he began to wonder. “He’s never acted like this before, not since the very first day I met him.”
As Rumble walked home, he thought back and remembered the day they met. It was as if it had been yesterday…
…
Rumble had managed to get Diamond Tiara in trouble and now dreaded going outside. She and her friend Silver Spoon was going to get him for sure. As Miss Cheerilee was teaching, he looked up at the clock miserably like a condemned pony counting down the last days of his life.
The alarm rang and the school day was over. Rumble’s ears and tail drooped down. They’re gonna get me for sure! They’ll get me outside, away from the school grounds. He gulped and stood up, leaving the building, not even listening as the teacher gave out the assignment. He wore his brother’s hand-me-down military outfit, complete with camo trousers and military boots, except it was his size.
As he began walking home, he heard a voice coming from behind him. “Hey, blank flank!” it called. He turned around and saw two snooty-looking fillies approaching him. The pink one, Diamond Tiara, narrowed her blue eyes and glared at Rumble.
“Yeah, I’m talking to you, Mr. G.I. Blank Flank. You got me in trouble today, dork. Now why would you do a thing like that?”
Rumble began to stutter like he always did when he got nervous. “Uh, w-well, I d-d-didn’t m-m-mean t-to…”
Diamond strode up to Rumble, her blue eyes blazing with fury, and shoved him against a tree.
“H-hey!”
“Blank flank down!” the gray filly, Silver Spoon, screamed.
Diamond leaned in close and whispered to Rumble. “Do you need a medic? No, they don’t have those for blank flanks. Only for real ponies.”
“G-go away!” he yelled at the fillies, his voice cracking. He did not want to cry, but his eyes began stinging anyway, as he was unprepared for being humiliated.
“Pfft, oh, why should we?” Diamond poked him in the chest with a well-manicured index finger. “Oh, what, you’re going to cry? Go on! Cry!”
“Or go tell the teacher,” Silver Spoon said. “Go on, we know you want to! But it still doesn’t change the fact that you’re a stupid little blank flank!”
“Blank flank! Blank flank!” Both of them laughed at him, chanting and pointing at him, until Diamond leaned back in and snarled.
“If you mess with me again…”
“Hey!”
Both fillies looked up to see a new colt. He had a light brown spot on his left eye, but otherwise had a white coat and dark brown mane. Wearing a red T-shirt and some gray shorts, he marched up to the bullies, glaring at them.
“Ugh, what do you want?” Diamond Tiara groaned with disgust.
“Go pick on somepony your own size, you barmy git!” He spoke in a Cockney accent.
Diamond blinked a few times, then cocked her head to the side, clearly confused. “Uh, what did you just call me?”
“You heard me! You’re a barmy little git!” the colt repeated. “I mean, bloody hell, just going and picking on a colt like that who never did you any harm! Some kind of trollops, stupid tossers, that’s what you two are!”
Both fillies looked utterly baffled. “Uh, were those supposed to be insults?” Silver Spoon asked.
“I don't even know if those were words!” Diamond replied.
“What are you, daft?” the colt asked. “A couple of bloomin’ twats. Now sod off!”
The two fillies shrugged, and Silver spoke up again. “Uh… we’ll just leave now.” And they turned and casually walked away.
“Yeah, you’d better run!” the colt shouted at them. “Come back ’ere, I dare you! I’ll bite your legs off!” He shook his head and turned to Rumble, reaching his hand down to help Rumble up. “Pish, bullies. A universal problem. You alright?”
“Yeah… thanks for jumping in. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are continuously on everypony who can be picked on… for any reason.” He let out a sad sigh, taking the savior colt’s arm. “What’s your name? I’m Rumble!” Rumble’s ears perked up and a smile covered his face as he introduced himself.
“M’ name’s Pipsqueak! Nice to meet you!” He grinned and shook Rumble’s hand, having to reach up slightly, being shorter than Rumble.
“Where are you from?” Rumble asked. “Those words, where did you learn them, what do they mean?”
“I’m from Trottingham, those words meant… well, let’s just say if the teacher knew what they meant, I’d be in big trouble.” He chuckled. “Talking of which, do you know where I can find the teacher? I have to bring these medical files to ’er.” He pulled out a folded-up piece of paper.
“Miss Cheerilee? She’s this way! Come on!” Rumble answered, pointing at the schoolhouse and quickly ran towards it.
Pipsqueak trotted behind him happily. Only a few minutes in town and he’d already made a new friend!
…
Rumble finished reminiscing, stepped inside his house and set his backpack down by the door, which he shut behind him. He walked through the kitchen, his hooves trodding over the white floor tiles, as he opened the cupboard and grabbed a bag of chips from it.
Upon entering the sunlit hallway, he bumped into his older brother, Thunderlane. In his twenties, Thunderlane had a dark gray coat with a two-toned cyan mane. He wore a black leather jacket, a blue shirt with a gray thundercloud and yellow lightning bolt emblem, and torn blue jeans. To finish the bad boy image, he carried his red electric guitar with him.
“Whoa-ho-ho, hey little bro!” He smiled and ruffled Rumble’s hair. “How was your last day of school?”
“The way every day should be!” Rumble answered, smiling. “’Sup, big bro?” he asked then, pointing at the guitar.
“Not much, pretty normal day for me too. Hey, you found any fillies you want to take to Waterworld?” He wiggled his eyebrows, smirking. “Any who look good in a swimsuit?”
Rumble made an expression that said ‘You can’t be serious!’ and shook his head. “No… no, I didn’t find anypony yet… but seriously, big bro, you’ve had five marefriends in the last two months, can’t you just stop? Geez.” He made a disgusted expression and left Thunderlane there, going towards the phone.
“Hey, I was only thinking of your best interests!” Thunderlane called back to Rumble. “Don’t you want a filly who looks good in a swimsuit?”
“Yeah, I do want one, but not for you to ogle!” Rumble angrily retorted. He loved his brother, but if it was about ladies, Thunderlane was such a douche. Rumble took the phone in his hands and dialed Scootaloo’s number. After a few rings, a voice picked up on the other end.
“Yello?” it answered in a somewhat nasally voice. “Who goes there?”
“Take a guess,” Rumble answered, rolling his eyes. “’Sup Scoots?” He knew too well that Scootaloo had been at her home twice as long as he had, using her scooter to get there faster as usual.
“Oh, hi Rumble!” Scootaloo responded. “I’m good, glad to finally be out of school. How about you? I bet you’re enjoying your summer so far!”
“Yeah, all half an hour of it so far. Uh, I wanted to ask you, I’m going to Waterworld soon. Do you want to come with me? I have nopony else to join me there…” A note of desperation was in his voice as if she was his only hope.
“Wow, Waterworld?” she responded. “Uh, wow, that’s… that’s really tempting. Hold on, lemme check my schedule.” Rumble could hear some flipping of pages on the other end before she finally sighed. “Ooh, sorry. I’m pretty booked for the next few weeks; Dash is giving me rigorous flight training. Sorry. Wish I could, though.”
“Really? Aw come onnnn…” Rumble sighed, losing his last chance for a good time before his big brother took him away into the mountains for a complete month. “Are you sure you can’t come…?” he asked once more, knowing that it was futile.
“Sorry,” Scoots replied, actually sounding sad that she wasn’t able to come. “My schedule is already packed, especially with Pip’s birthday tomorrow and all.”
“Wait, what?” Rumble gasped, eyes going wide. “That’s tomorrow?!” He began to panic. “I didn’t even get a present for him!! What should I do?!”
“What, you forgot?” Scoots scolded Rumble. “Dude, you’re his best friend! You should remember these things! Well, uh, you can think of something, he tends not to be too disappointed. But yeah, we’re planning a surprise party for him at his house. The Cakes will bring the food, Pinkie will bring the party. Only problem is, we don’t know how we’ll set up the party without him finding out.”
“Wait, I have an idea!” Rumble exclaimed. “I can bring him to a pizzeria, he loves pizza!” He began to explain his plan. “It could take around, I don’t know, almost two hours till we are done there?”
“Ooh, yeah! You can get your present for him before then, and then take him to… ah, what’s that place… Black Olive’s! They make really good pizza there!” Scoots seemed to like this idea. “And your brother can help with the party preparation! That takes care of that, then. And hey, you may meet a filly at the party to go with you to Waterworld, right?”
“Yeah… a filly…” After rolling his eyes, Rumble nodded to himself. “Alright, this is set, I’ll take him to Black Olive’s and keep him there. When should I show up?” He scratched the top of his head.
“Get there at 2:00 to pick him up, 2:30 at the latest, and you should be good to get back by 4--but no earlier,” Scoots replied. “And don’t mention it to Pip! We want this to be a surprise!”
“Yeah, yeah, I get the idea. I should go and find him a present now, so, see you tomorrow, Scoots!”
“You too!” Scoots replied, and a click was heard as she hung up the phone.
Rumble now had time to think about what he should get for Pip. What was Pip into? Well, he was into pirates, video games, hair metal music, pizza… wait, no, he was already getting Pip some pizza.
Starting to walk around in the house as he grabbed a handful of chips from the bag, Rumble fell into his thoughts. “What’s a thing he really likes… something he is really into… he likes pirates, yeah, but what else?”
Thunderlane was playing his guitar, albeit unplugged, when Rumble passed by. “What’s up, little bro? Somepony’s birthday?”
“Yeah, it actually is. Remember my best friend, Pip? His is tomorrow.” Rumble stopped in front of his brother. “I’ve known him since we were kids, but every year it’s a struggle to find him a present… any ideas?” He rubbed his forehead.
“Yeah, I remember him. He’s the Neighlander kid, into pirates, right? Hmm…” He thought about it for a few seconds, then smiled. “I got it! Why don’t we buy him a lap dance? I’m sure he’s old enough for one by now!”
“A lap dance.” Rumble’s ears drooped as he stared at Thunderlane. “Seriously?” He shook his head and facepalmed. “Bro, sometimes I actually wonder if you have feathers in your brain.” With a sigh, he walked away once again, heading upstairs to his room. “I’ll just think of something,” he murmured.
“Hey, I was just kidding!” Thunderlane shouted after Rumble, then muttered, “No way would I pay for a lap dance for someone who isn’t me…”
…
The sound of two pairs of heavy boots filled the early afternoon air as two brothers walked down the road, chatting.
“…and then I’ll keep him in the pizzeria for about two hours,” Rumble finished, setting the plan for the day. “Simple enough, no?”
Thunderlane was carrying a large, flat box with him in his folded wing. “Yeah, I got this. You sure he’ll like the present?”
There were a few houses around, very plain-looking, nothing too fancy like in the middle of the town. They approached a smallish house where they could hear the distinctive sound of heavy metal blasting.
“Take a guess, big bro,” Rumble replied, motioning toward the source of music with his head. “Pip loves hair metal, and especially this band. He will be all over me, I bet.” He chuckled to himself then, imagining Pip jumping around like a happy puppy.
“Hah, well, he has good taste,” Thunderlane said, nodding his head to the beat of the music. He walked up to the door and gave it a knock. After a few seconds, a somewhat chubby mare opened the door.
“Yes?” she said.
“Uh, hi ma’am. You may remember me, I’m Rumble’s big brother.”
The mare looked down at Rumble and smiled. “Oh, yes, I remember you! You’re here to help with Pip’s surprise party! Come on in!”
“Thank you, ma’am,” Thunderlane said as he stepped inside, with Rumble following him.
“Hello Mrs. Estella!” Rumble cheerfully greeted her.
“Hello, Rumble!” the mare whispered. “Pip’s in his room.”
Rumble ran upstairs to meet Pipsqueak, looking around. It was a plain-looking interior, nothing flashy, but the kitchen and living room were big and open, perfect for a party. The rest of the house was the same as the living room except the door of Pip’s room, completely plastered with stickers and posters. Rumble loudly knocked.
He could hear the music playing inside. “I brought my… pencil! Gimme something to write on, man!” before it was abruptly turned off.
Pip opened the door, dressed rather peculiarly: he wore a pair of socks on his hooves with no shoes, a dark blue short-sleeved shirt with a white collar, and a pair of red shorts with a black belt that held a small toy sword. A red bandana was tied up in his hair, and a black eyepatch covered his right eye. Rumble also noticed that he was holding… a roll of bandages? What was that about? Pip smiled and ran to Rumble, giving him a big hug. “Rumble! How good it is to see you! How have you been?”
“Oh hello Pip, happy birthday!” Rumble was confused about the whole thing as he reluctantly responded to the hug. “I’m doing alright. Uh, what’s this costume for?”
He smiled, pulling away from the hug. “Well, it’s a special day today, y’know. I figured I may as well ’ave some fun with it, right? So what are you doing here?”
“Uh, right. So there’s a really good pizzeria in town, Black Olive’s, and since it’s your birthday, I came here to invite you to join me for pizza! You love pizza, I love pizza, what do you think?”
“Pizza?” Pip’s eyes grew wide and he grinned. “Why, of course! Thank you, I’d love some pizza! Let me just put on my shoes. Hold this, please…” He handed the bandage roll to Rumble and darted into his room, returning a moment later with his tennis shoes. “Now let’s go, shall we?”
“Uh, what is this for?” Rumble asked Pip, looking down at the bandage roll in his right hand. He was genuinely confused.
Pip looked down at the bandages, then up at Rumble, and nervously smiled. “Uh, nothing! I was, uh, bandaging up a wound in there. Nothing more.” He quickly grabbed the bandages away and ran back into the room, then ran back out without them. “Well, shall we go?”
“Uh… uhm, yeah, sure.” Rumble couldn’t understand why Pip had the bandages because he couldn’t see any wounds anywhere on his body. It made no sense! Nonetheless, he shrugged it off and headed back downstairs.
Pip gave Estella a hug. “G’bye, Mum!”
“Have fun, Pip!” Estella said, hugging him and sending him off.
“See you later, Rumble!” Thunderlane said and waved.
Pip followed Rumble out the door, cheerfully trotting along the road. “So, have you been to Black Olive’s before?”
“Actually, I have! She’s a nice mare, makes good pizza. Big bro ordered from her too; she brought out the delivery in person! It was really funny; Thundy tried to hit on her and got slapped!” Rumble chuckled.
“Hah!” Pip laughed. “Oh, your big brother never changes, does he? Do you know if he’s ever thinking of actually pursuing a serious relationship, or just wants to get in the pants of every mare in Ponyville?”
“What do you think?” Rumble looked at someone way up ahead. “Hey, isn’t that Sweetie Belle?” He squinted. There was a silhouette of a filly getting closer.
Pip looked ahead at the approaching silhouette. “Huh, I suppose it is! What’s she doing out ’ere?”
As the filly jogged closer, her features grew more visible. She was an off white unicorn filly, with a curled lavender and pink mane that hung down over the top of her white-rimmed sunglasses. Her breasts, each one perhaps the size of a cantaloupe melon, jiggled up and down in her yellow sports bra with every step of her long legs. They could hear her huffing and puffing as her hooves jogged along, covered by tennis shoes and long, white socks that went nearly all the way up to her thighs and hips, which were adorned only by a pair of pink running shorts.
“’Ello, Sweetie Belle!” Pip waved to her.
The filly stopped and caught her breath. Her horn lit up with a green glow as she used her magic to lift her sunglasses. “Oh,” she panted, “hi guys.” She bent over, holding her knees with her hands and inadvertently exposing her cleavage.
“H-h-he-l-hello Sweetie Boobs--uh, I mean Belle!” Rumble responded, staring wide-eyed at the big busted filly. “On-on a little jog?” His voice was hoarse, shocked by her epic sexiness. His wings nearly popped open, too!
“Yeah.” She stood back up, jiggling again. “Uh, Rarity thinks I need to lose some weight, so I’ve started jogging daily.” She shook her mane out of her eyes. “Well, seeya later!” She pulled her shades back down and jogged away, presenting Rumble and Pip with a view of her big, round derriere.
“G’bye, Sweetie Belle!” Pip called to her, waving once more as she left. He turned back to Rumble. “She should really jog more, poor girl’s looking exhausted as can be.”
“Dat ass,” Rumble whispered, ogling the named part of Sweetie, then turning to Pip and raising an eyebrow. “Wait, what? You can’t be serious, Pip, look at her! How can you not like how she looks? I mean… she’s like… oh man, I wish I could just… just…” His expression of awe turned sad. Letting out a sigh, he resumed walking. “Let’s go.”
“Just what?” Pip asked as he got in front of Rumble, walking backwards and gazing at Rumble with his dark brown eyes--or eye, rather, as the right one was obscured by his eyepatch. “What would you do, eh?”
Rumble frowned, looking away from Pip. “Can’t you see it?” he asked. “Sweetie is the filly I would… y-you know.” He tried to explain, unable to look Pip in the eye. “Don’t you ever think about having a girlfriend anyway?” he asked Pip, finally making eye contact.
Pip rubbed his chin, thinking about it for a few seconds, then shrugged. “Ah, guess I never had time for fillies. But please, do continue.” He lifted his eyepatch and looked at Rumble with both eyes now. “Sweetie is the filly you would… what?”
“Ugh, you know… I would like her to be my girlfriend, you doof!” Rumble admitted, blushing slightly. “I liked her even before, but now look at her.” He turned back around to see Sweetie, but she was out of sight by this time. “I just don’t understand it. Big bro gets all the mares he wants, and I’m still here, dreaming about just one fillyfriend. If I was just a bit more desperate, I’d ask you to be my fillyfriend, now imagine that!” He shook his head with a sad laugh. “And you’re not even a filly, so that would be screwed up.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and slowed his pace as he kicked a rock ahead.
Pip smiled, blushing. “You… you would? Wow, I’m… well, I’m flattered.” He looked off to the side for a few seconds, then looked back at him. “R-rumble… there’s something I need to tell you, something I have to get off my chest.”
“Hmm?” With his good mood lost, Rumble wasn’t a good audience for Pip. He just wanted to get to the pizzeria so he could stop thinking about being a loser.
“Well, you see, I… there’s this…” Pip looked ahead, trying to recapture his thoughts, when he gasped. “Bloody ’ell, we’re here! Look!” He pointed ahead to a building with a large sign on top of it, showing a pizza slice with black olives on it. With a grin, he pulled down his eyepatch and pulled out his toy sword. “Come, Rumble! We have a pizza shop to conquer! Y’arrgh!” he growled like a pirate before darting ahead.
Confused, Rumble could only tilt his head to the left, still frowning. Not in the mood to race Pip--who was so speedy on his hooves that Rumble would have to fly to keep up--he simply walked after him, kicking away that rock.
Eventually, he got to the pizzeria, where Pip was standing in front of the counter, looking at all the tasty pizzas on display with various toppings. There were several booths and tables where ponies were enjoying their meals; however, there were also several that were unoccupied.
A dark green unicorn mare with a curly black mane and tail stepped through a swinging door, carrying a full cheese pizza on a platter, which she then placed in a brick oven. Working hard, the mare was about thirty years old and was curvy, even chubby, but that was to be expected of somepony working in a pizza shop. Nevertheless, she was good looking, with nice, plump breasts pressed under a white T-shirt and black apron; a pair of huge, round hips; and a pretty face to match. The colts could see her working quickly as the sweat stained her clothes. Sighing, she shut the oven door and returned to the counter, looking down at the colts. “Welcome to Black Olive’s. I’m Black Olive, can I take your order?” She spoke in a sexy, yet natural-sounding voice.
“Pizza! Pizza pizza pizza!” Pip shouted enthusiastically. “I’ll have one hay parmesan slice, a slice of the pesto/avocado/tomato, one artichoke/spinach slice with extra tomato sauce, a couple of breadsticks… oh! And an iced tea lemonade.”
Black Olive wrote the order down and looked at Rumble. “How about you?”
“Uh…” Rumble first had to get his thoughts off of the previous topic; all he could see was how attractive this mare was. “Uh… I-uh, I will have… uh…” He had to think quickly! He pointed at a random pizza. “…that one.” But it was still obvious that he was staring at Olive’s chest.
Olive looked down at the pizza. “The four-cheese with garlic and olives? Okay. Anything else?” He didn’t respond. “Hey! Anything else? Like a drink?”
Rumble shook himself out of it, now able to think. “Yes, a large glass of orange soda would be nice.” He intentionally looked away. This comes when a colt gets that age.
With his eyes off of Black Olive, he realized that he was looking at Pip! The earth pony colt blinked a few times, looking back at him, then blushed and looked away, smiling once more.
“…large orange soda. Got it.” Olive finished writing everything down and looked at the two colts. She raised an eyebrow, pointing back and forth between them, then shook her head. “That’ll be thirty-six bits.”
“Right, got it.” Rumble reached into his shorts pocket and took out a wallet to grab the needed money. “Thank you, ma’am.” He looked around for a place to sit and saw an empty booth nearby. “Should we go there?” he asked Pip, not noticing the blush still on his face.
“H-huh?” Pip looked at the booth. “O-oh, yes, let’s go there.” They headed over. There were already some napkins set up at the booth.
Sitting down quickly, Rumble put his hands on his face, shielding it from the world around. “What’s wrong with me?” he asked. “I’m supposed to be happy right now, enjoying our day out here in this pizzeria, eating good pizza, having fun.”
Pip sat very close next to him. “There, there, Rumble.” He put his arm around Rumble’s shoulder. “Everything will be okay. Hey, the pizza should cheer you up, right?” He then wrapped his other arm around Rumble, embracing his friend in a full-on hug.
“I guess…” Rumble agreed, and then something hit him. “Hey Pip, why so touchy all of a sudden? No offense, but the last time we were this close was when we collided and fell on each other in that Capture the Flag game back in middle school!” He looked at his friend suspiciously. “Something wrong?”
Pip blinked at Rumble and chuckled nervously. “Eheheheh, no reason.” He quickly moved back and found his place at the other side of the table. “Oh bollocks, you can remember that far back?” He laughed. The sound of Pip’s laughter was nice, somehow. Calming.
“I hurt myself pretty bad then, didn’t I?” He thought back to that day.
…
Pip and Rumble had Silver Spoon cornered up by a patch of bushes. “End of th’ line, little git!” Pip shouted at her.
“Pfft, what are you gonna do, blank flank?” Silver taunted, never growing tired of that insult. “Run after me?”
“We are! And we’ll win this game, for sure we will!”
“Hah! If only you can catch me. You run like a girl, y’know.”
Pip growled, his eyebrows furrowing. “That’s it! Rumble, get ’er!” He lunged forward.
Rumble propelled himself forward both with his hooves and wings, which gave him an extra boost in speed. But he overcalculated, giving too much power to the flap of his wings!
Silver darted out through the small gap to the right of the two colts. The combined confusion of their sudden loss of target, as well as the miscalculation of Rumble’s speed, caused the two to slam into each other at high velocity. They both fell onto the grass, with Rumble causing Pip to fall backward.
“Gah… ow, that smarts…” Pip groaned, trying to get up but finding Rumble on top of him.
“Darn it, she’s getting away!” Rumble grumbled, trying to get up. “Pip, why didn’t you watch where I was going?” he asked his friend then, trying to look into his eyes.
“How was I supposed to know she’d somehow slip away, throwing our attack off by a bloody mile?” He tried to move his leg, and then moaned in pain again. “Ow… I think I sprained my bloomin’ hoof in that fall…”
“Huh?” Rumble finally managed to get off of Pip, looking at his leg and taking it in his hands. “Is it really hurt?” he asked, gently tapping on it. This was met with a groan from Pip, as he clenched his teeth and squirmed.
“I doubt it’s broken or anything, but I might need help walking back to the classroom.” He sat up, rubbing his head. “You slammed into me real ’ard.”
“Sorry about that, Pip,” Rumble apologized, smiling awkwardly. “Here, let me help you up.” He stood up and held out his right hand so Pip could grab into it and get on his hooves.
“Thanks.”
As Rumble helped Pip walk towards the classroom, two unicorn colts ran up to them. One of them, a fat teal colt with an orange mane, shouted at them. “Hey! Why’d ya stop playing? Get back in the game!”
“Buzz off Snips, Pip here sprained his hoof,” Rumble yelled back, pointing at Pip’s leg. “Do you think we’d quit if Pip was alright?” He shook his head angrily.
“Boo!” the second one, a lanky orange colt with a teal mane, shouted at them. “What’s the matter, a teeny little injury and you get to quit the game?”
“Oh, sod off, Snails,” Pip shouted back.
“What’s the matter with you, eh?” Snails continued taunting. “You little weirdo! Can’t play sports worth horsefeathers, never showering with the rest of the colts in the locker room…”
“I said, sod off!” Pip tried to swing at Snails, but fell onto his hoof, which caused him to wince again.
“Little wimp!” Snips called before he and Snails ran off and continued the game.
Pip shook his head. “Those two, I swear…”
Rumble was fuming. If he wasn’t helping Pip stand, he would have jumped at Snips and punched out his ugly buckteeth. His expression, combined with his angry red face, told Pip what he wanted to do. “Swearing is one thing, acting on it is another… come on, let’s get there quickly,” Rumble finally said, concentrating on the task at hand.
…
“Excuse me, sir? Sir?”
The voice of Olive snapped Rumble away from his memories. She was standing next to the table, looking down at the two colts. “Your pizza is ready, c’mon over to the counter to pick it up.”
After a couple of quick blinks, Rumble got up and went to the counter, still wondering about that specific memory. As he walked there, he looked at Pip, trying to figure out what was wrong. On the countertop, he found a tray with the four pizzas and some breadsticks.
“I’m still getting the drinks,” Olive said as she filled a cup with ice. “I just wanted to ask you a few things. Hope this isn’t weird or anything.”
Rumble shook his head, concentrating on Olive. “Uh, sure, what is it, Miss Olive?” he asked, looking into her golden eyes.
Olive filled the first cup at the soda fountain. “I wanted to ask about your friend. I take it you and he have known each other for a long time?”
“Yeah.” Rumble nodded, looking back at Pip again, who waved to him. “Since… how many years? Over half a decade!” He looked back in Olive’s eyes. “Why?”
“Just curious.” She finished filling up the soda cup and put a lid on it, then stuck a straw inside it. “I noticed that he’s, uh, rather close to you, and not just as friends.” She put the cup down on the tray.
“What do you mean?” Rumble demanded an answer. Rather close to me, not just as friends? What?! he thought, getting confused quickly.
Olive started up with the second drink, Pip’s. “I’ve just noticed that he, well, he was sitting pretty close to you in the booth, hugging you rather tightly. And when he moved to the other side, he was blushing and looking away.” She moved to fill it halfway with iced tea. “Isn’t this strange to you at all? Or is that just his normal way of acting?”
This was an opportunity for Rumble to speak his mind freely. “Well…” Rumble thought about it, furrowing his eyebrows and frowning. “…actually, yes. He was always distant, almost avoiding physical contact. Why would he act like this now?” He looked back at Pip. “I didn’t even notice it. Huh.” Rumble’s confusion began to turn into suspicion.
Olive filled the other half with lemonade. “I know all too well what this is. He’ll gaze at you from across the classroom, a wanting in his eyes so dear that he can barely resist it. He’ll become overjoyed and hug you whenever you’re there. He’s your best friend, but wants something more. Tell me…” She put a lid on the cup. “…has he shown any interest in girls?”
Realization hit Rumble like an oncoming train. “N-no… we passed one just on the way here… I almost couldn’t speak, but he… he…” Unable to continue, Rumble just stared at Pip, eyes as wide as saucers.
“But he was more interested in you.” Olive sighed, putting a straw into the cup. “I knew it. Well, you’ll have to break it to him eventually. And I know you’re into girls, I saw you looking at my boobs. Oh, don’t act all surprised. I get that a lot from stallions who come in here.” She put the cup down on the tray and bent down to get on Rumble’s level. “All I can say is, be careful.” And with that, she left to prepare the next order.
Dumbfounded, Rumble nodded, taking the drinks with him as well, slowly heading back to the booth where Pip was waiting for him. Thoughts were zapping about in his head and he had no idea how to react to them. So he just brought the pizzas and the drinks to the table and sat down, staring at his pizza, not even touching it.
“Yum!” Pip picked up one of his slices and began chowing down.
…
“I still can’t believe you didn’t eat any pizza,” Pip mused as he and Rumble walked along the road back to Pip’s home. “I thought you’d be utterly starving!”
“Uh-huh,” Rumble nodded, unable to pay attention to Pip. All he could think was that Pip was most likely in love with him. It gave him the chills. He wanted tits! A big, grabbable ass! He had no interest in colts. He looked at Pip. He’s… a bit too soft-looking for a colt, I’ll give him that. But still! He sighed, forcing himself to think about the task ahead: the party.
“You seem rather quiet today, Rumble.” Pip looked at his friend with a questioning expression on his face. “You’re still depressed about not being able to find a filly to take to Waterworld, aren’t you?”
Quickly thinking, Rumble nodded. “Yeah, it sucks.” At least he was able to answer. “Only good thing in my summer,” he added with a sigh.
“There, there, I’m sure you’ll find some filly you can take, even if she’s just going as a friend.” He looked ahead as they got closer to his house. “Huh, why aren’t there any lights on?” he murmured. He walked up to the front door and opened it, stepping inside. “’Ello? Did power go out?”
On came the lights, revealing a large crowd of fillies, colts, and even some mares and stallions.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”
The interior of Pipsqueak’s house was decorated with colorful birthday-themed stuff: confetti, streamers, balloons, and a big banner hanging from the ceiling that read ‘Happy Birthday Pip!’ There was also a large cake on the table with bright yellow and purple icing and several candles.
“Happy birthday,” Rumble quietly added, unable to look at his friend.
At first surprised, a grin came to Pip’s face. He happily jumped in the air! “Oh my Celestia, thank you all, thank you so much! This is magnificent!” He saw that several of the guests were holding little boxes. “And you brought gifts, too!”
Thunderlane nudged Rumble, handing him the small, flat box. Forcing a smile on his face, Rumble took it, hiding it behind his back. “Thanks, bro, I owe you one,” he whispered to Thunderlane, his smile turning into an awkward one.
“You’re welcome; you have no idea what I had to do to get this,” Thunderlane replied out of one corner of his mouth.
Pip walked through the crowd and found the cake. “You even brought a cake! But it had better be chocolate!”
Many of the ponies chuckled at this. One of them stepped forward, an orange-coated pegasus filly with a purple mane and tail wearing a dark gray hoodie and green shorts. “Y’arr, I’m glad you like it, matey!” she spoke, trying to emulate a pirate voice. “I organized it under threat of walkin’ the plank! And… oh, rut it.” She finally shook her head, dropping the voice. “Can’t do that right.”
Pip laughed. Once again, his laughter was somehow calming to hear. “It’s alright, Scootaloo. Thanks.”
He gave her a fistbump. Scootaloo smiled and turned to the other ponies. “Alright, which of you wants to give Pip his birthday gift first?”
Several fillies and colts volunteered. Still unsure about the whole thing, Rumble patted his brother on the shoulder, waiting for somepony else to take lead so he could join in the line.
“Okay, one at a time,” Scoots announced. “Pip, since I organized the party, I’ll give you mine first.” She pulled out a very large box from behind the table and pushed it over to Pip, who eagerly pulled it open.
“Oh, wow!” He bent over and stood the object up, revealing it to everypony. “A motorized scooter!”
The ponies went “Ooh!” and “Ahh!” Scootaloo grinned.
“Yup! I figured I’d get you one after I accidentally disassembled your scooter when we were kids.” She nervously rubbed the back of her head.
“You remember that?” Pip laughed. “Wow, so many childhood memories lately! Thanks!” He gave Scoots another fistbump. “Alright, next!”
Scoots walked away from Pip, heading towards Rumble. “I see you found a gift for him,” she said.
“Yeah,” Rumble nodded lamely, “but it’s only because of big bro. I owe him bigtime.” He looked up into Scootaloo’s light purple eyes. “Scoots, tell me something. Don’t you think that Pip has been acting… strangely in the past few days?”
Scoots thought back, scratching her chin. “Strangely? What exactly would you count as strange?” This was another opportunity for Rumble to speak freely; Scoots was his best female friend, and was usually willing to listen to him.
“Well, I dunno if you noticed, but he’s been… um… attached to me a bit. I didn’t notice it myself until the owner of the pizzeria we were in pointed it out. She said that he’s…” He audibly gulped, afraid it was true. “…in love with me.” A quiet whisper, that was all Rumble could muster up for the last part.
If Scoots had been drinking, she would have done a spit-take. Her eyes widened and she leaned in and whispered in Rumble’s ear, “In love with you?! No, that can’t be right! You and he are best friends, and he’s never shown signs of being gay.” Then she thought back. “Though… I did ask him out once, and he declined.” She frowned. “At first I just figured I was too unattractive for him, with my lack of, uh, assets, but now that you’ve brought this up… There’s gotta be another reason for this!”
“He’s never really shown any interest in anyone ever,” Rumble added. “Except for, uh, me.” He shook his head. “This isn’t right.”
“Don’t worry, I’m sure he was just acting this way because you’re his best friend, and his birthday was coming up!” Scoots gave him a reassuring smile. “C’mon, it’s normal for a friend to get a little close at times like these. Y’know, a man-crush.”
Rumble sighed, thinking for a few moments. “You’re right. I’ll just… I’ll just give him his present now.” With that, he left Scoots with a sad smile and walked to Pip.
Finished with the rest of their presents, Pip turned to Rumble. “And what ’ave we here?” he asked. “Saving the best present for last, are we?”
“Yeah, kinda,” Rumble answered and handed Pip the box. “I hope you like it, it’s not exactly common,” he explained, glancing at Thunderlane.
Pip opened the box eagerly, and pulled out a vinyl record. “Ooh, an album! What band is it, I wonder? Black Saddle? Motley Colt?”
He looked at the front cover, which showed a picture of an alicorn foal holding a pack of cigarettes. The title ‘VAN HAYLEN - MCMLXXIV’ was written in large lettering on the top.
“Oh, 1974 by Van Haylen.” Pip sighed as he turned the album around. “Uh, thanks, Rumble, but you know I already ha--”
He stopped. On the back cover, below the track listing, was some writing scrawled in black ink. It read, ‘To Pipsqueak: Never stop rockin’!’ and was followed by four signatures.
A huge, delighted grin grew on Pip’s face, as tears of happiness seemed to form in his eyes. “You… you didn’t… autographed by the actual members…?” Before Rumble could do anything, Pip embraced Rumble in a big, tight hug. “Oh, thank you, Rumble! You have no idea what this means to me! You’re the best friend anypony could ask for!”
Forgetting all the bad things, Rumble happily hugged Pip back, the years of being best friends returning into his memory. Pip is alright, he thought as he patted his back. “Aw, come on, I’m not that great. Besides, big bro had a major part in getting it.”
Pip continued hugging Rumble for a good fifteen seconds, then pulled back. “Thank you both. This is the greatest birthday ever.”
“You’re welcome!” Thunderlane replied. “You wouldn’t believe what I had to do to get this--so many mares.”
Pip laughed. “Ugh, TMI!” He looked at the autographed side and smiled. “Well, come on! We have a party! There are activities to be played, cake to be eaten, and fun to be had!” He pulled out his toy sword again. “Onward!”
With a cheer from everypony, the party began!
…
As the minutes passed, Rumble found himself having so much fun at the party that he forgot all about Pip’s suspicious behavior. He was finally happy again, having the time of his life at the surprise party Scoots had organized!
But soon enough, he found himself being followed by Pip again. Nearly everywhere he went, Pip was close behind. When he went to get a glass of punch, Pip was standing right in line behind him. When he talked to the former Cutie Mark Crusaders and shook hands with Apple Bloom’s new boyfriend, Mitch, the human boy from another world, Pip was right next to him, introducing himself simultaneously. When he casually chatted with Pip’s parents about his plans for the summer after school was over, Pip was there, listening to every word Rumble spoke.
It dawned on Rumble that Pip was acting odd again, when he sat down at the table, eating a slice of cake… and Pip sat right next to him, verrrry closely. During all this, Pip had a strange expression on his face: his lips curved into a smile, ears perked up, and looking right at Rumble. He even somehow was able to keep this expression as he ate his own slice of cake. It wasn’t so much an expression that said, ‘You’re my best friend,’ as it was, ‘I want to rut you like an animal and feel you from the inside.’
“What’s wrong, mate?” Pip asked as he wrapped his right arm around Rumble’s back. Rumble noticed that a few ponies were looking at them.
“Uh…” Rumble’s eyes looked around for an area to escape to. “Air. I-I need some fresh air, it’s too crowded for me in here,” he said, putting the plate of the half-eaten cake away. “I think I’ll go upstairs a bit, too many people are down here.”
“Oh, al-alright.” Pip looked down sadly.
Rumble stood up, heading towards the stairs. On his way there, he passed by Scoots. She was talking to another colt, a brown earth pony who was holding some kind of handheld gaming device. Upon Rumble passing, she raised an eyebrow and nodded to him.
“Okayyyy, you’re right, Rumble. As Pip would say, he’s gettin’ bloody close to ya, mate.”
“I know, right?” Rumble replied hurriedly and looked at the colt with Scoots. “’Sup, Button?” And with that, he ran upstairs.
“Uh, ’sup?” the brown colt replied and looked at Scoots. “That was weird.”
…
As Rumble ran upstairs, he quickly found the colorful door to Pip’s room. Taking a big breath, he ran inside, closed the door behind him, locking it, and quickly went to Pip’s bed, sitting down on the side of it.
“This isn’t right.”
He began to look around, looking for clues that could explain all of this to him. Pip’s room looked the same as ever with posters of sci-fi movies, a mobile of pirate ships above the bed, and an extra large poster of Van Haylen showing a black and white picture of the four shirtless stallions with long hair holding their instruments. There was no sign of anything that could be taken as an actual clue.
“Damn it!” Rumble grumbled angrily. “Why me?” He leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees and holding his head in his hands. “Just why?”
He didn’t find anything. Nothing, that is, except the roll of bandages on the nightstand. Curious, he grabbed it and looked at it closely.
“What are you used for?” he asked the bandages, as if he could get an answer. The roll didn’t tell him anything, except that it was recently cut. “This makes no sense.”
Rumble put it back on the nightstand, sighing. He remembered the first time he had been in Pip’s room. It was on a sleepover back when they were still kids.
…
“I brought the popcorn, Rumble!” a young Pip shouted as he ran up the stairs. He was wearing his pajamas, a red jersey with matching pants. He darted into the room, carrying a large bowl of popcorn with him.
Rumble, wearing simple dark cyan pajama shorts and a matching shirt, was impatiently waiting in front of the TV, switching between staring at it and at Pip. “Finally!” he exclaimed. “Gimme, gimme, gimme!” He grabbed the bowl out from Pip’s hand and began to stuff his face. It was about time anyway; they were watching a movie about pirates and action and an interesting part had just begun.
As Pip settled down next to Rumble, lying down on his stomach, the protagonist pirate stallion kissed his sidekick piratess mare. Rumble frowned, only wanting to see the action.
“Oh, what?” Pip’s eyebrows furrowed. “Boo! Boo! Do they really have to show the kissing? As if I have any interest in cootie-filled fillies. Blecch!” He groaned and shoved his hand into the bowl, stuffing his mouth with the popcorn.
Rumble nodded. “Yeah, this is supposed to be The Pirates of the Zebrican, not the Lip-Suckers of the Zebrican!” He angrily chewed on the popcorn. “Come ooon, on with the action!”
The mare and stallion’s lips parted. Then they resumed sword-fighting with other pirates. While their ship was in a gigantic whirlpool. And about to collide with a ship of zombie-pirates led by a griffon with a beard of tentacles.
“Yay!” Pip cheered. “No more girly tripe! Just swashbuckling action! Y’arrgh!” He growled like a pirate.
“Yeah, finally!” Rumble agreed, grabbing more popcorn to munch.
…
Rumble had seen nothing wrong with Pip at the time. “Hm. Pirates. Wonder how he became interested in them, and when.” He hummed. Turning his attention to the other parts of the room, he tried to remember other things that might help him.
Just then, he heard the doorknob jiggling, and the door swung open. But how could that be? He’d locked the door behind him! As the door opened and the sounds of the party outside became clearer, Pipsqueak stepped inside. “Hi again,” he simply said.
Surprised, Rumble almost yelled at him. “Pip?! What are you doing here? H-how did you even get in here??”
Pip frowned. “Well, it’s my bloody room, and some kinda pony I’d be if I didn’t have the key to my own room.” He shut the door behind him.
“Oh… oh! Right… I… I forgot,” Rumble admitted, realizing that he was a dumbass for not remembering. “So… so what’s up, why did you follow me up here?” he asked Pip then, feeling awkward. Please don’t try anything… Drops of sweat rolled down his forehead.
Pip walked over to Rumble and sat down next to him, on the same edge of his bed. He pulled off his eyepatch and looked up at Rumble. “I think we both know why I followed you,” he said. Before Rumble could reply, Pip grabbed him by the shoulders and looked at him deeply in the eyes.
“Let me cut to the chase, Rumble,” he said. “We’ve been friends since childhood. You’ve always been a colt I’ve admired and loved as a friend. In fact, you were one of my only friends. I was actually very unpopular, and several ponies shunned me and thought I was a weirdo, but you, you stuck by my side all those years. Nopony would get in our bloomin’ way! We were pals forever!
“Now, as we’re getting older, I’m thinking of you in a very different way. I don’t want to be only friends, I need something more… something different… I love you, Rumble,” he finally admitted.
There was silence after this, where all that was audible was Pip’s breathing, now heavier. But before Rumble could say anything, Pip did what Rumble had been fearing: with one swoop, he leaned in and kissed him, pressing his open lips against Rumble’s.
Help! I wasn’t prepared for this! Rumble thought, silently screaming and accidentally opening his mouth in the process, which let Pip’s tongue invade. Frozen in shock, Rumble couldn’t do anything for at least a good twenty seconds. Then he finally blinked and pushed Pip away. “Mmh-wha, blecch! What the rut, Pip?!” he almost yelled at him again.
Pip looked back at him with a sorry expression. “B-but I… I…” he tried to say. He immediately knew this was a bad idea.
“Pip… why?” Rumble asked, shaking his head sadly. He didn’t sound angry. Or shocked. He was just… sad. “I don’t understand this… or you… through all these years… you could have just… hinted it… we had so many opportunities… why did you have to… go straight ahead and kiss me? I’m not gay!” He hid his face behind his right palm.
Pip pouted. “I… I’m sorry… I just wanted to…”
“You wanted to do what?” Rumble yelled as his anger suddenly returned. “Climb on top of me, that’s what you wanted? Well for the record, I am not gay, Pip, do you understand that? Did you even notice when I was ogling Sweetie Belle’s tits earlier today?” Emotions stirred around inside him, making him sad and angry at the same time. “We were supposed to be friends. I feel like you betrayed me,” he said in a sorrowful tone. “Why Pip, why? Why did you have to do all this?” His tone began to shift from sad to angry again.
Pip’s face looked absolutely miserable. Like he was devastated. Wrecked. He turned around and faced away from Rumble. He was dead silent for a few moments… then Rumble could hear him making a sniffling noise. Very quietly. He reached up and wiped his eyes. He was crying.
Like a swift mountain river reaching the plains, Rumble’s emotions slowed down, becoming settled. He gently put his right hand on Pip’s shoulder. “Pip, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to… to…” Then Rumble pulled the crying Pip close to him. “Oh Pip, I’m so sorry.”
Pip audibly wept now, making little gasps as he cried. He turned and hugged Rumble back. His tears dampened Rumble’s shirt. It was all done very girlishly. “I… I ruined it. I ruined our friendship.”
“Pip, you didn’t know, alright? Though there were obvious as the sun signs of me not being gay, but… uh… you didn’t know.” Rumble tried to comfort him, patting his back.
Pip sniffed, wiping the tears from his eyes, and pulled away. “Th-thanks for understanding,” he said with a weak smile, “b-but there’s another thing… I’m not gay.”
“Uh, what?” Rumble became confused for the umpteenth time. “In my understanding, gay is when two males love each other?” He tried to explain it. “And both of us are guys?” he added, tilting his head to the right and making an expression of various emotions and a high level of confusion.
Not saying a word, Pip put a finger to Rumble’s lips. “Hush.” He grabbed the bottom of his blue shirt and pulled it up over his head. Before Rumble could say anything about getting naked, he noticed something peculiar about Pip’s body. He had a thin, slender waist, curving outward near the bottom, as if making way for a pair of large hips. His navel wasn’t toned by muscle or fat like other colts. But the weirdest part was Pip’s chest, which was covered with bandages. Why? The answer came when he saw cleavage above the bandages that compressed Pip’s chest… holding a pair of breasts.
Pip smiled, blushing. “Surprise.”
“W-w-wh-whaaa?”
Rumble stared at Pip’s chest, still covered with bandages. A few more seconds of wide-eyed staring and he reached up, placing a hand on Pip’s cleavage.
“No way,” he whispered. His eyes began to dart around as realization hit him like a freight train.
“Nooo waaaaay,” he repeated, mouth hanging open. “Pip, all this time…”
He tried to finish his sentence, but shook his head, gaining a stern expression.
“Take the bandages off,” he commanded her. “Now!” His mind was settled on one thing, a thing he had always wanted to do.
Pip was admittedly very surprised. “You… you sure?” she asked. “Okay.”
She reached to her back and undid a clothespin, the thing that was holding the bandages on. After this, she started unraveling them, turning the end around her body time after time. With each turn, the bandages covered less and less of her breasts.
After the final unwrapping, they bounced out of their bound prison! Nice, round D-cups with pointy brown nipples, a darker shade of brown than the light brown of the spots on her coat. One such spot was right above her nipples, on the top of her breasts.
“They really aren’t much…” she said, blushing as her ears flopped down against her head.
“Nonsense.” Rumble placed his hands on her shoulders and pulled her close while leaning forward: he pushed his face between those plush breasts, pressing them together. “Oh goooooosh YEEEEEESSS!” he exclaimed, lost in the moment.
Pip looked down at him and raised an eyebrow. “Okay, so maybe they are that much,” she muttered, as she reached her hand down and scratched Rumble behind his ears. “That’s peculiar, I thought you’d have questions for me.”
“Not now, I’m having a moment here!” Rumble replied, moving his head around a bit to feel the softness of Pip’s bosom. “Glorious,” he muttered. After a good half minute later he leaned back. “Alright. So, questions. Why didn’t you tell me about this?” He pointed at her breasts.
Pip looked down at her chest, then up at Rumble, and spoke again. Strangely enough, though she spoke in the exact same way, her voice sounded a lot more feminine now. “Well, I was afraid that if I told you, you would tell everypony else, and I haven’t told anypony before; well, of course my parents knew since I was born this way” She grabbed her breasts, shaking them. “And don’t try to deny that you would’ve told otherwise. I’ll be honest, if it were the other way around and I’d found out that you were a filly, I would’ve told everypony.”
“Fair point. Uh…” Rumble began to stare at the tantalizing view. “Pip, in all seriousness, if you want me to poke a hole in my boxers, just tell me. Making me hold back like this is just cruel!” Indeed, his pants were painfully bulging!
Pip smirked. “We might have to get that checked on later, mate. Looks mighty dangerous!” She laughed in her usual calming manner. “I mean, I thought for sure you’d at least be interested knowing why I’ve been hiding my gender all these years.”
For a few moments, Rumble thought about it, then nodded. “Actually I am curious. I mean, look at you!” He opened his right palm and held it up, pointing towards Pip’s bosoms. “Please explain it to me.”
Pip sighed and began. “Well, okay, so when I first moved to Ponyville, I didn’t have to use these.” She pointed at the bandages. “Obviously, but, well, I’ve been dressing like this, pretending to be a boy since I left Trottingham. Remember when I first met you how I said bullies were a universal problem?”
She frowned. “That’s as good a summary as any. Back in Trottingham girls were taught to be sugar and spice and ever’thing nice, but having a girl who was into boys’ things like heavy metal, pirates, and video games? It simply would not do. So whenever we were out of the class and the teachers weren’t lecturing us about ‘eating our hay before our pudding,’ the other fillies there were determined to convince me I was a weirdo and had no place in their schools. One even asked why I didn’t just become a boy since I was so unlike a girl.
“Well, when Mum announced our move, I sure was happy about it. I could finally start over in a new town! So I started wearing colts’ clothing, got my hair cut shorter, even started wrapping my chest when these grew in.” She shook her breasts again. “Except now, I’m not so sure about it.”
She sighed again. “It’s not easy hiding who you are all these years. You get so wrapped in the fantasy that occasionally words begin to slip. Especially when you find yourself falling in love.” She looked up at him. “After all this, I don’t know if I want to tell everypony the truth. I’ll still be the same old Pipsqueak, the Neighlander kid, but now that I’m a filly, everypony’ll try to get in my knickers.” She hugged Rumble tightly, inadvertently pressing her tits against him. “Rumble, what should I do?”
For a few moments Rumble thought about the problem. “Well,” he began, leaning back a bit, “I think I actually have a solution.” He nodded, lips pressed together in determination. Suddenly, he grabbed her breasts, saying one word. “Dibs!”
With a good-hearted laugh, he let go of her, hugging Pip again. “But in all seriousness, Pip, we should, well, go on a date or something?” he offered. “We’ve always had good times before.”
Pip pulled her head back and looked him in the eyes. “You silly sod, we’ve practically been dating for years!” She laughed again, with her cute, cute laughter. “Now what do you say we give this whole kissing thing a second try?”
Before he could answer, she pressed her soft muzzle to his, opening her mouth as she did so, though this time, he was more willing to oblige, and he passionately kissed her back, even taking the lead in the tongue fight! While doing so, he reached his hands down and felt Pip’s buttocks, lightly stroking them through her shorts.
Then an idea occurred to him. Breaking the kiss, he presented it to Pip. “Y’know, Pip, it’s funny. My big bro had this stupid idea, this idea that we should get you a lap dance for your birthday. Don’t think you’d be interested in that, of course, unless…” He awkwardly smiled, not finishing his sentence.
As he’d hoped, Pip picked up on where he was going with this. “Hmm, actually, I’m interested in this. A lap dance, hmm?” She stood up, jiggling. “Well, I’m not exactly sure how to do this, never practiced it or anything, but I’ll try! And I know just the perfect music.”
She walked over to the table by the door and picked up her new album, the gift Rumble had given her, and pulled the record out. She then put it in the phonograph and started it. “Side A, track five,” she muttered to herself and stood back up.
The song started up with a soft riff played on an electric guitar. Pip looked at Rumble. “Takes a few seconds.” Then she kicked off her shoes and socks.
Indeed, after a few bars, the bass and drums kicked in at a beat worthy of a striptease-lap dance, and Pip started dancing to it. It took her a few seconds to get into it at first, and she stumbled as she was trying. She got up again with a chuckle. “Heh, sorry.”
Rumble smiled, dismissing it with a wave of his right hand. “Go on, go on.” He grinned. Thinking of Pip as a filly--especially seeing her with those boobies--it changed everything for him.
“Will you drop the shorts too?” he asked.
“I was about to get to that,” she replied with a sultry grin. She reached down to her crotch and unbuttoned the top of her shorts. At this point the singer started singing, and she sung along with him as she unzipped her shorts.
“Dig that steam, giant butt!” she sang along with it, and at this point she dropped the shorts, bending over to give him the full view.
All that remained was a tiny white thong, which effectively highlighted her nice, curvy buttocks and athletically toned legs. Looking at her whole body, Rumble had no idea how he could ever have mistaken her for a boy: her thighs and hips, her slender features, and everything about her seemed girly. When she turned around, he could finally see all the light brown spots on her fur as she walked towards him, shaking her hips. Apart from the spot on her eye and the one on her breasts, there was also one on her left hoof, and a larger, fourth one on her right hip.
But considering that she was almost naked as she ran her fingers up and down her body, the spots weren’t the first thing he was looking at, as Rumble’s eyes darted up and down her, taking in everything he wanted to see on a girl, all the curves, all the well toned lines, both her beautiful boobs as they gently jiggled… and his eyes focused on her thong. Oh boy, she’s almost at it! He happily grinned.
As she strutted closer to him, her seductive expression reminded him of the one she had given earlier as they were eating cake together. When she was only a foot away, she grabbed the edge of her panties and wiggled her eyebrows at him, teasing him as if she was about to drop them, only to let go of them and turn away so he could see her backside once more. She bent down and began rubbing her butt against his crotch, and sang along with the song’s chorus:
“You know that you want it! I know what you need!” She then stood up and looked back over her shoulder. “When the night is through, will I still be loving you?”
Like a young colt in a candy shop, Rumble grinned and eagerly nodded. “Yes please!” he squeaked out, suddenly not knowing what should he do. So many possibilities!
Pip smirked and began strutting away from him, rubbing and clutching at her body as she did this. As she turned around, she tripped and fell onto the floor again. She groaned and looked up at him. “Whoops.”
But as she was now on the floor, she took this as an opportunity. Instead of standing up, she began crawling along the floor towards him and grinned. She stopped at the halfway point between him and the wall behind her to get in a crouching position and shake her butt back and forth, raising her tail so he could get the full view. As the chorus returned, she began crawling back to him, and finally placed her hands on his knees and propped herself up, sitting on his lap and facing him.
“Lift your arms and wings,” she whispered, as she grabbed at the bottom of his shirt and began to pull it up. In an instant, Rumble’s upper limbs were straight and upheld. Only his grin was bigger than his enthusiasm!
This is really happening! Dear Celestia, this is really happening! His breathing turned into short gasps for air as his excitement grew.
Pip lifted Rumble’s shirt and threw it to the side. As the song launched into its instrumental portion, she grabbed his shoulders and began rubbing her love pillows against his chest and her crotch against his, moving to the beat of the song. After a few moments of this, she let go of his shoulders and grabbed his hands, placing them on her breasts.
“You know you want to,” she said and released his hands, grabbing onto the bed for balance and moving against his crotch.
Rumble was eager to squeeze her boobs, which he did as soon as his hands came in contact with them. He looked at them, at his crotch as Pip grinded against it, and up into her eyes. “Yes, I want to,” he whispered, getting to the point where he was almost unable to hold himself back.
As Pip settled herself on his lap, facing him, the song slowly faded out. She was sweating all over, her cheeks blushing red as she breathed in and out. The song finally stopped a few seconds later, and she stared into his eyes with her own beautiful brown ones. The moments passed as they looked at each other in their own little heaven with the only sound being the sound of their breathing.
Suddenly, and without warning, Pip leaned forward and attacked his mouth with her own. She wrapped her arms around him in a full embrace as the force of her body against his sent him falling backwards onto the bed with her on top of him.
That was it. His body reacted, returning the kiss eagerly. His hands quickly moved down. First Rumble gently groped Pip’s buns, then he reached lower and began to push down his pants, more than ready to release his raging erection! He wanted her. He was so close to her. This was the moment!
Pip briefly broke the kiss to help Rumble with his shorts. “Release the Kraken!” she said, and with one yank, the pants came down and his erection popped out. A surprised expression came to Pip’s face, and she looked up at him.
“Rumble,” she said between heavy breaths, “I love you. And I hope you love me enough to help me through this because I have no bloody idea what I’m doing.”
Rumble chuckled, then nodded. “Yes, Pip, I love you too, I feel it. Also, lucky for you, I, uh, had a few chances to spy on big bro, so, uh…” A big blush grew on his face.
Pip laughed. “That must’ve been awkward. So what do I do? Well, apart from this, of course.”
She pulled down her panties and kicked them off her legs. Rumble could see her tight, virginal pussy, which was already gleaming wet!
“Well, um, get above the head of it.” He reached down and aimed his member--which was pretty big for his age, as pegasi have been known to have big ones--straight up. “When there, just simply, uh, slowly lower yourself onto it?” Though he knew how it looked, describing the process was difficult.
Holding onto the ground, Pip positioned herself above his stallionhood. “I keep hearing that this is rather painful the first time, do you know?”
“Yeah, I’ll have to break your hymen, but if you try not to concentrate on that moment of pain, it might be okay. Now lower yourself down.”
“Okay…” She unsurely moved down further, until her pussy lips just barely touched the tip of his penis. “Rumble, how should I proceed?” she asked.
“Let… let me do it.” He put his hands on her hips and gently guided her downwards. Pip’s nether lips became parted as the head of Rumble’s member entered the most outer parts of her pussy.
Rumble continued to guide Pip downwards, entering her more and more. “Thaaat’s it. Tell me if it hurts, okay?”
“O-okay…” Pip shut her eyes with the initial sensation. “Might have to stretch for this one.”
“No time to waste,” Rumble whispered, pulling her even further down, continuing the penetration until his cock met with something blocking the way. “Huh? Is that your hymen?” he asked Pip, wiggling her to the left and right a bit so she would have an idea.
Pip squinted. “I… I think so. What should I do now? Is this the part that hurts?”
“From what we have been told…”
Suddenly, without warning, Rumble thrusted up, forcefully breaking Pip’s hymen and bottoming her out in the process. Pip’s teeth grinded together as she winced in pain. “Uuunnhh!!”
“…yes.”
After the pain was over, she looked down at Rumble. “W-was that it?” she asked.
“Yep, sorry.” Rumble awkwardly smiled, trying to make an apologetic expression. “We can, uh, stop if it still hurts.”
Pip frowned and bent down to look at him directly in the eyes. “Do you know how long I waited for this? How many times I’ve gone into heat, and had to hold back from you?” She shook her head. “If you stop now, I’ll bloody kill you, I swear.” With this, she began to ride up and down on Rumble.
“O-okay…” Rumble blinked, almost scared for a moment. But he quickly forgot about it and concentrated on the task at hand: with the help of his hands on her hips and the moving capabilities of his lower half, he took a firm hold of Pip’s buns and began to move her while pumping up inside her at the same time.
“And I have been waiting for this,” he said, a grin crawling up on his face. Finally having sex, it was even better than he’d imagined it! He looked up at Pip’s soft love pillows, bouncing and jiggling all around.
“Praise the bounce!” he exclaimed.
Pip began breathing in and out more heavily as he moved her up and down on top of him. “Oh… hah,” she panted, “this is a workout! Maybe I wouldn’t’ve flunked gym class if I did this everyday!”
Or maybe if you’d done what the other fillies did? Rumble pondered to himself, but he quickly forgot about it. He had something much more interesting to do! And though he had masturbated before, he felt like he could go on for a long time! He couldn’t be happier!
Pip began letting out cute little moans--moans that would have sounded very girly if they had coming from a colt. Looking back, how could he not have known?
“Ah… ah… Rumble…” she cried.
As Pip got louder and louder with her moans, Rumble became quiet, so concentrated, he had no time to make a sound, save for the slapping of his crotch against her as he fucked her relentlessly! Holy shit, this is actually happening! THIS IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING! He started to feel a warm tightness appearing in his crotch.
“Oh… dear Celestia!” Pip moaned out. “R-rumble? I’m… I’m about to… to… AAHHN~!!”
She shut her eyes and moaned out loudly. Her cunny’s muscles squeezed around Rumble’s member and her pussy juices flowed, almost locking him inside her!
“Gosh!” Rumble gasped. But after a few seconds’ pause, it passed and he was able to move again: just his luck, he got even closer!
“H-how was it?” he asked Pip, continuing to fuck her without dropping the pace.
“Ohhh… ohhh… shut up, you,” Pip said, playfully batting at his face as he kept moving her up and down. “My gosh… wow…” She reached up and felt her tits. “So… so good to finally have these free…”
“I know, right?” Rumble grinned, following Pip’s love pillows with his eyes. “Oh… oh-oh-oh, here I cum!” He let out a few groans, then a pleasured moan as he slammed up into Pip while pushing her down as much as he could, shooting his load inside her twitching twat. This continued a couple of times before he withdrew. Pip practically fell forward, landing on top of him.
“Uhn…” Rumble tried to catch his breath. He was feeling exhausted, but very satisfied!
Pip was just as out of breath. “Oh… wow, Rumble…” she panted. “We should do this again soon, whadaya think, mate?”
“Mm-hmm, though… I’m not sure if I should tell this to big bro… though I really want to…” He weakly wrapped his right arm around her.
Pip chuckled. “Heh, I can only imagine what he’d say.” She then did her best impression of Thunderlane. “‘Score, little bro!’” Then she sighed. “At this point I’m not even sure if I should tell anypony else about, y’know, me being a filly and all.” Rumble could feel her breasts move in and out on his chest as she breathed. “I mean, everypony’s used to me being a colt, and it’d be weird if they found out. Maybe we should just keep this secret?”
“Actually, no. I don’t want it to be a secret. I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?” Rumble shook his head. “If anypony--and I mean any pony--tried to make fun of it or anything, he or she will meet my fists of anger!” His expression turned angry. “And I’m sure Thunderlane would help me, too. He cares about his little bro, after all.”
Pip nodded. “I suppose you’re right. I think I’d get in trouble with the school, though, for faking my medical forms all this time. But I’m still not sure if I want to do this.”
Suddenly, they heard the doorknob jiggling, as if somepony were trying to come in. Pip gasped and pushed herself up. “D-don’t come in!” she shouted, but it was too late.
The door swung open and Scootaloo and Button ran inside, holding hands… only to stop when they saw Pip and Rumble. Pip’s face bore an embarrassed expression with her ears flopped down and her eyes wide, complete with a very visible blush. Scootaloo bore a similar expression, only it seemed more shocked. And Button, well, he looked like he was about to have a nosebleed right then and there.
“Uh, hi Scoots,” Pip said.
The color drained from Scoots’ face as her eyes darted back and forth between Pip and Rumble. “Y-you’re a… and you’re with… and you… you…”
Button glanced over at Rumble. “Wow, high score man!” He shot Rumble a thumbs up.
“But… but I… I…” Scoots had a hard time processing this. She suddenly shouted out. “WHAT IS GOING ON?!”
“Scoots, calm the hell down!” Pip shouted at her. “There’s a very simple explanation for all of this. I’ve been a filly this whole time, pretending to be a colt, and now my best friend is also my coltfriend.”
This only made Scoots panic more. “B-but… I… what?! My head hurts!”
Button looked back at her and grabbed her hand again. “Whoa, hun, okay. Come on, we’ll go to another room now.” He looked back at Pip and Rumble. “Have a good one.”
Scoots was still shaken up about this. “To think I ever had a crush on Pip…” she muttered as Button closed the door again.
Pip looked at Rumble. “Oookayyyy, guess I have to tell the truth to everypony now.” She laughed again in her sweet, loveable laughter, then looked down at Rumble. “You promise you’ll help me through this?”
“But of course,” Rumble reassured her, pulling her close to him. “We’ll get through everything. I… I love you, Pip.”
“Aww, I love you, too!” Pip smiled and kissed him passionately on the lips. Best friends once, fillyfriend and coltfriend now, Pip and Rumble were inseparable.
Author's Note
Kirb: Well, this certainly went through a lot of development hell in the making, didn’t it? For those of you unaware with what happened in the making of this story, I had originally posted it with a different cover picture and as four separate chapters. But those of you who remember when I originally posted it also remember how it got a negative rating because of the original cover art--it showed Pip and Rumble standing next to each other, and people assumed that it was a gay fic. Those of you who read it now know that it’s not one at all. But anyway, I took it down in frustration, but so many people asked me to repost it that I went ahead and did so, only as one long chapter this time instead of four different ones. I hope you’ve all enjoyed reading this version of it as much as Zeph and I have enjoyed writing it for you. If anyone has any constructive criticism (if you think the twist could have been handled better, or thought that I didn’t write a British accent properly) please tell me in the comments below. Once again, thanks to sevenofeleven for prereading it. I will now let Zeph talk about this story.
Zeph: As Kirb said, we enjoyed creating this story. It was actually fun despite all the morons who disliked it without reading! My favourite part, beside the twist ending, was how Thunderlane is depicted in the story--my idea--and how good it turned out! As it was hinted in the story, this is part of the series of stories taking place in the same universe. References from one another will be shown, even in later stories! Ask Kirb about details. Well, thanks for everyone for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! Please leave a comment and rate, and if everything goes well, we’ll see you in the next story!
