Worst. Festival Day. Ever.
Festival Day was one of the stranger things of the world that, by Luna, you'd easily get sucked into. It was a national Equestrian holiday that nopony really knew what it was about without any story, song, or explanation. No one needed one though. It was nice enough without one and that was its own charm. Ponies threw parties, decorated, had their own traditions. Those who had a business had discounts. Taking advantage of this, Passion Blaze decided to go and see Canterlot for Festival Day.
It felt time to take a relaxing trip to Canterlot. He had finally gotten through writing a new history book for the Ponyville school much to the dismay of foals. Still, he loved doing what he did and it was enough to keep him going. Even still, he has felt somewhat worn out and decided while he was in Canterlot, he'd engage in one of his favorite passtimes, which was getting a drink at the cafe.
Passion Blaze loved the cafe in Canterlot. He would go and visit every time he was in Canterlot as many of the higher class ponies did. Even though the fact that is was considerably cheap on Festival Day was enticing enough, Passion Blaze was one for the fancier lifestyle, ironic being that he lived in the small town of Ponyville.
After he got his cup of coffee, he decided to take a stroll through the oldest part of the capital around the princess' castle, ready to see some great sights.
Close by Passion, Princess Luna was strolling through the same district. She was busy absorbing the aimlessly festive atmosphere. She loved how beautifully decorated the roads were with bright paper lanterns, the sides of the streets buzzing with performers and vendors of exotic toys and foods. Luna was glad she woke up to take in the colorful scene, even if she did expect the celebration to be much better once she brings nightfall. Her indulgence, however, was cut short when a guard approached her with a look of slight concern.
"My Princess…"
"Yes."
"We're short one pony to pull your chariot in the parade."
"H-How could we be short on working stallions?"
"Well, forces are spread between the normal patrol, the extra precautions taken to prevent robberies, the elites who'll be participating in the parade, and we didn't have too many enlisted earth-ponies to begin with.”
“But we should still have enough guards!”
“Yes, but… Celestia got a new chariot and needed more ponies to pull it in the parade.”
Rage made Luna’s mane wave violently and her eyes started to glow. In her mind, she cursed her sister’s name, the one who always have to have what she wanted. Mother forbid if she took a little more for herself. Celestia? No! If she wants it – she gets it! It just wasn’t fair!
Luna shook her head, bringing herself back to the present. Her mane settled and the ghostly glow of her eyes faded away. She couldn’t pull away any guards from their positions. This was a situation that she, as a princess, was able to solve… or wait for the solution to appear before her in the form of a red-hooded earth-pony sipping on coffee as he strolled on by. Luna almost gasped at her own luck. It was an earth-pony! In Canterlot!
“Hey!” Luna called with a swiftness. "Does thou wish to pull my chariot?”
The earth-pony stammered, pointing at himself to make sure that this was really happening. Luna nodded. The royal guard rubbed the back of his neck.
“Uh, princess?” The guard whispered. “Are you sure about this?
“I have faith in this stallion. You should too.”
The guard sighed and rolled his eyes.
Passion Blaze was jittery as he was escorted to the room where Luna’s black, gothic, steel chariot sat and it wasn’t just the coffee at work. The guard was somewhat concerned with this, but this is what the princess wanted.
“Okay. Just wait here while we get our ceremonial armor on.” said the guard.
And with that, he left Passion alone. He walked around the room, marveling at the princess’s black chariot. An ancient relic such as this was his “thing” being the pony-of-the-past he was. It was like Pinkie Pie to sugar or Celestia to cake. All alone with Luna’s battle cart gave him a strange kind of thrill – a “fanboyish” kind of thrill. In this state, he took a notepad and pen out of his pocket and made notes and sketches. Soon however, it wasn’t enough for him. This was the chariot Luna rode in on the first Nightmare Night after her return and in wars that happened over one thousand years ago. To truly experience it, he had to get into it. There was nothing wrong with it. No pony around to stop him. He kept his coffee at hoof while he climbed in. He wasn't ready to let it go, yet he was so excited to feel the chariot's power from within.
There is one thing about the chariot that Passion was unaware of, something that is often left out of research: The chariot was equipped with a suspension system. This helps the princess to stay comfortable while riding castling and well-focused while she was in battle. In this case, it made the chariot rock when Passion stepped in. In his excitement, Passion neglected his grip on his cup and it spilled all over the cushion seat.
He spilled coffee on Luna's cushion - Not some of the coffee. Practically all of it.
He spilled coffee on Luna's cushion - A part of Equestrian history.
He spilled coffee on Luna's cushion - The precious item of a goddess.
Passion feel his body collapse as everything went dark.
A few minutes later, the guards came back with Luna. She wasn't happy at all about the big brown stain on her midnight blue cushion. This chariot was something that didn't fail to cheer her up on a bad day. Even on Nightmare Night, when the whole world seem to be running away from her, the rides around Ponyville were fun and, after spending one thousand years on the moon with absolutely nothing, she treasured her possessions, and especially the ones that comforted her.
Luna stepped onto the chariot. She spent two minutes trying to slap the hooded pony awake. (Well, it was really one minute spent waking him up, but she accidentally knocked him out in her fit of rage and had to try again for another minute.)
"Oh, buck…" he moaned waking up on the floor, sitting up on his haunches.
"How… can you spill coffee… on my chariot?" The princess growled.
"Well, it wasn't easy…" The stallion joked, rubbing his head. Luna shot him a cold stare of her darker alter ego. Passion suddenly felt four inches tall. "I… really liked the chariot…I-I just had to stand in it."
"Tell me, what's your name?"
"P-Passion Blaze."
"The history writer."
"Well, a lot of the time. I dabble in other things." he answered with a smile, almost blushing.
Suddenly, Luna grew a twisted grin on her muzzle and the Nightmare Moon in the alicorn began to show.
"After the parade… I have a special punishment for you."
The princess motioned for a guard and whispered into his ear.
"Oh, ho, ho…" he laughed. He turned his attention to Passion and gave a sympathetic cough. "Dude. You're screwed."
"What?"
As the guard told him, Passion's eyes nearly popped out and his hood jumped off of his head letting his long, black mane flow down the side of the chariot.
"Can we settle on a sentence on the moon for a guilty plea?"
The princess shook her head and the world started to get dark again.
As Luna had willed it, the guards brought a grave looking Passion to an oak wooden door.
"Hey, smile." One guard told him, knocking on the door for him. "It'll make thing easier for every one.
After several moments, a jolly, rosy-pink mare with a cutie mark of flowers opened door.
"Hey, your here." Cherilee said. "Here, come in."
The guards left Passion to Cheerilee who guided him through a hall to a classroom of fillies.
Passion Blaze had a weakness against foals. The foals who knew him, tend to hate him. He liked foals, though. He had fun writing for them and getting to be a little fun-loving, but there was something about Passion that foals in particular hated about him…
"Listen up, every pony." Cherilee announced. "This is stallion is the one who wrote your books for history and literature."
That's when Passion felt the subtle ice in the foals' gazes that he was all too familiar with. Cherilee was obviously oblivious to this and carried on.
"His name is Passion Blaze and the princesses wanted him to teach the class today. While he's doing that, I'll be getting some work done, but I'll be back for recess and lunch. Have fun!"
And with that, Cherilee went into another room where Passion swear he heard the hiss of a bottle opening following the shutting of the door. Also following that was a barrage of erasers and bits of paper. After the pelting subsided, Passion picked a paperclip from his bangs.
"It's okay…" he thought. "It's only…. five…. hours…."
He looked back at the fillies who were all laughing at the substitute and forced a friendly smile.
"So… You know Luna's chariot has a special feature called a suspension? It has several purposes."
