Swallowing Ourselves From The Tail; I Don't Believe In Anything
Author's Note
Warning: Once you take a step forward, you will be here and there; focus slowly, read steadily, and learn from what you have processed. Not everything needs to remain constant and nothing needs to remain everywhere. Your perception is what matters, your entertainment is what is embraced, and your criticism is definitely wanted. Careful now, take a deep breathe, remember what I just told you now. Remember...remember...remember. Now go. Read...read and begin to see why the Sky is beginning to Bleed.
Swallowing Ourselves From The Tail; I Don't Believe In Anything
The skies of Equestria were dull and gray as the clouds were gone, and as the sound of water no longer whistles in my ear from the ruined fountain at the center of the garden, resides nothing but I and Me in this day of sorrow. Prime and glorious, regal and proud, charming and warm, and settled as a chime. You have two tasks to follow, each with a grand drop of surprise in the middle, in which when the day passes so does your heart's twisted desire to not grow, thus filling up the gluttony within your soul.
I should have noticed this, clearer than any day, but darker than any shadow ominous than Sombra's that would hide behind where this moment would have occurred and I remained unknown to it. The troubling results in the end did not play so well, and the twitching limbs of a life unsewn could only cause a shiver to course through my body. I have to blame myself for this blindness, but sadly, even I cannot look at the sun so boldly and accuse another soul to another day of misfortune.
My heart has poured so much compassion into this moment of time that to which an immortal would fear finding and begin to mourn when they start tossing away beautiful enigma. Sacrifice pays no mind to love as love pays no mind to madness, sadness, and the ending touch to one’s happiness. In the end, you’re all alone. A curse for any immortal who would live longer than me, than to have me die beside them. It’s selfish. It’s cowardice. Sadly, even Luna is not so wise to know that.
I wished once before to share this kind of love within the depths that pushes me out of my own natural fear than what comes to my mind abstract and twisted as if I was lost like King Lear. Which explains why the sun was so bright, beautiful, and so calescent. If only I could share that warmth, would it have changed anything? Perhaps not seeing how this fate would have succumbed in end upon this silent requiem.
The soul of mine was so heavy. All that i could think about was carrying its weight upon my shoulders to hold me up. This is deserving of me for not seeing this come so sooner and allowing what we naturally feel cloud our eyes and seduces our hearts. It was warm, soothing, caring, and there. The love I had for it was so touching…but now it was gone. It was gone because of me. Forever.
When the sun shine upon it, it was so close…so close to being touched. I could have grasped it. I could have held it. But it slipped, fell into the abysmal depths of the abyss where forgiveness could be heard, but not acknowledged.
The world was starting to shatter apart when it fell into the depths. All so gone, where the light would not shine upon its form; frail and indestructible figure. The sky no longer was laced with that iridescent effigy. No. It was torn apart too, where the dark was white and the light no longer shine so bright. IT was gone. IT was dead. IT WAS NOTHING.
I no longer knew if I should had welcome this acceptance or continue to fade out of existence, but the world remained unrepaired. The life we know of no longer has the touch it once did. It no longer can pertain to its task, Equestria ceased to have meaning here.
Boldness and stubbornness never coaxed as well together as a kaleidoscope would with a blind pony. Layers of the layback nature are so esoteric that doing anything to change its purpose would be a crime. Never touch what you cannot hold, for what I held not just fell, but was caught by another. Another being that I could not stop or take it back from. And that was me.
The more I continued to fight back against me, the more I continued to get back what was rightfully mine. In the twisted sense of this, I always hurt myself. I never could win against me for all I did was beat myself up. All I did was tired myself out. And all I ever did was pursued an essence no longer there for me to keep. I was my own enemy as it was my own goal. My essence. My point of existence. My glowing orb in the sky. The beacon that established the foundation of Equestria and my very steeple.
It is my fault that all I came to obtain back again was something I could never have. I was delusional. I was lost. I was fading away into the white. I lost my way and there I was beginning to fade away as Twilight sunk further into her severance.
All of those I once knew meant nothing to me and all of those that meant nothing to me became something to me. For if you gained nothing then you have gained something. Such a twisted, cold, heart-less, and brutal paradox. This psychotic nature has become nothing more than a phantasm of suffering. But who is to say I rather not suffer any much longer? Who will not disagree that I would choose this as my own punishment? Here I am, talking to myself, speaking loudly as if I am somebody else. As if I am someone pulled into reading a lost mare’s story. Am I just talking to myself?
I need to breathe…I need to cry…I need to scream…I need to hate…I need to hurt…I need to fade away. And I need something. I need something so badly. I need it now. I need to get it back. I want it back. I can’t have it back.
Where are you? Where am I? And if I must bear this punishment for myself why can’t I lay down the final punishment to end all punishments? I have forsaken what I adore so much and now I am not needed back from it.
What other punishment could be worse than seeing what you adore so much rip away from you by you? The point was made, the judgment was casted, and so the story has been explained. But where does this story end? Where does it begin? Where does it continue? Where does it spread its seeds? I have lost my way, and so I bid you an excuse to save me from you. An excuse labile to the nature of this ending. This final lesson to only you.
~fin~
How To Destroy Angels-And The Sky Began To Scream
