I... I failed.
Through the double doors in front of me, I can hear the applause for her. The stallion, panting with the exertion of holding me back, turns to me.
"Hey, I can let you in now."
I look up at him, shaking my head. Instead, I get up and start walking back home.
All along the way back, I hear her voice, the pain, the sorrow... and the final resolution, "This friendship is over."
That's what did it. Those four words. Since then, I've been entirely off balance. I rushed out of my session with Neon, trying to be there for her.
And failing. Failing to be there. Failing to prove my worth. Failing to prove I deserve her friendship.
Like she said, this wasn't the first time it had happened. My inspiration struck at odd times. More often than not, I'd missed her performances, instead focusing on recording mixes that had come to my head in the late hours of the afternoon.
Sometimes I only noticed I'd missed another performance because I heard her come in the door with a sigh. Sometimes... I didn't even notice then.
It starts sprinkling.
Why not? It's not like I deserve better. I'll probably just go home, lock the door to my bedroom and drink my problems away, again.
Wait... I can't.
Why not? Because she won't be there tomorrow morning. She won't be there to help with my hangover like she always is. She won't be there at 'my' next performance, like she always has been in the past. She won't be making breakfast... won't be getting the mail... won't be there for me.
Why should she? Have I been there for her? No. I've been selfish, thinking only of myself. Never asking her what her plans are. No, I just apologize, then take her to dinner. Make promises I can't keep.
Buck that. I'm going to do something new. Even if it's too late, I have to try.
I pull out my phone, speed-dialing her number as I sit next to a streetlamp, rain darkening my coat.
It rings once, then is sent straight to voice mail. I sit, listening to her voice.
"Hello, you've reached Octavia Von Clef. I am terribly sorry to have missed your call. Please leave your name and number and I'll reply as soon as I can. Thank you."
Beep.
"Uh, hi Octy... It's me, Vinyl... I know you're probably disappointed in me... You have every right to be. I'm not calling to offer to make it up to you, to take you to that restaurant like I always do."
"I'm calling to say I'm sorry. Sorry for all the gigs of yours that I've missed. For all the times I've brushed you off, or gotten distracted."
...
"I heard the applause. I ditched Neon about... 2 hours ago, I think. I was too late. Guard wouldn't let me in. Should've known it wouldn't be that easy. I bucked up. Now I gotta deal with the results. I'll... I'll just stay in a hotel for tonight. Let you think about this. Just let me know if you want me to leave... I'll..."
Celestia dammit, I won't cry.
"I'll start looking for a new place, K? Talk to you later. Bye."
Hanging up, I go back to our place, grab some bits, my favorite pillow, and an umbrella. I set off towards the nearest hotel.
Column's Comforts. It's a small place. Owned by this one mare that likes my music. She's always happy to listen to me talk about music or whatever. Seems like I'm one of the few regulars she has.
I push open the door, closing the umbrella as I do.
"Well, if it isn't my favorite customer. How... Hey, V, something wrong?"
The mare comes up to me, apparently picking up on my emotions. I shake my head, coughing a bit.
"Nah, just need a bed for the night. Single."
She looks at me, face filled with concern as her horn lights up, grabbing a small key from behind the counter. She drops it in my hoof, shaking her head as I start counting out bits.
"Don't. Look, something's wrong, I can tell. But it's none of my business if you don't wanna talk. But I'll help as best I can. So the room's on the house tonight. I'll be down here all night if you want to talk, Vinyl."
She smiles sadly at me. I give her a quick hug before heading up the stairs to my home for the night.
A few hours later finds me heading back down those stairs. Unable to sleep, I decide to take up that mare's offer. I just hope she's still awake.
And so she is. She sits on a couch in front of a roaring fireplace, a cup held in her magic next to her as she does something with some yarn and a needle. She looks up as she hears me coming down the stairs, a kind smile on her face as she sets aside her work, patting the couch cushion next to her.
"Bed not quite comfy yet, eh? That's fine. Come take a load off."
I smile wearily, taking a seat next to her as she takes a sip of her drink... Hey... That smells like...
"Is that... coffee?"
She grins at the incredulous look on my face, giggling lightly as she sets it on a small table.
"Yeah. Odd I know, but my... chemistry makes it help me sleep. But that's not important right now. What's important right now is you."
She points a hoof at me, that kind smile returning to her face. She wears the look well, like a mother that's heard everything and knows that she can help her child with any problem. It feels nice, knowing she cares.
It's different from her normal look when I normally visit for a night with somepony I picked up at a club. Normally she just loves talking about my music, almost like she's chatting me up for my night's company.
Now, though, she's a different mare. Motherly and kind.
I sigh, knowing she's going to drag the story out of me, no matter what.
"I certainly don't feel important. I feel like a failure."
Grimacing, she turns back to the fireplace. More than likely ready to say something about how I'm wrong, how I'm special and important in my own way, like everypony does.
"Ms. Scratch."
I look at her. I haven't been called that for years.
"Uh... yeah?"
She takes a sip of her coffee, staring into the flames as if all of life's answers are among the burning logs.
"Of course you're a failure."
She grins as she says this, holding up a hoof as I start to get angry at her.
"Hear me out. Everypony has, or will, fail. Eventually. You, me, and everypony else. However, I don't look like a failure, right?"
Mollified, I nod slightly as she frowns at a passing thought.
"Some failures... Some failures are big. Big enough to cost friendships, trust, and even family bonds. Others are small. Forgetting an important date, or a specific allergy."
She turns back to me, that same sad smile on her face.
"What matters, is how we deal with our failures when we realize them. What is your failure, Vinyl?"
I sigh, leaning back on the couch as I think about where to start.
"I missed another one of Tavi's performances... It was really important to her... She'd saved me a seat and everything. I was working with Neon on a new mix when she called me from backstage to remind me. I was already in the zone. Neon and I were making serious progress and I knew I'd lose the flow if I left."
She nods, waiting for me to continue. I sigh, knowing this is going to be difficult, but that if I don't, I won't get any sleep.
"So... I told her I had to blow this one off. That I was already too deep in my own work to stop. She seemed cool with it at first, but then she changed her mind."
I pause, remembering her words. My single pony audience sips her coffee before speaking.
"What did she say?"
I look at her, eyes starting to water again.
"That I'd done this kind of thing too often in the past, that I'd really let her down. Then she said those four words I never imagined I'd hear from her."
I catch my breath, stopping myself from crying. The mare places her hoof on my shoulder reassuringly.
"It's alright, Vinyl. You don't have to go on if you don't want to."
I shake my head.
"No, I need to talk about it. She said... Well, to quote her, 'Consider this friendship over'."
After that, I do break down. The tears start as I tell her about the rest of the evening. Leaving Neon, running to the performance hall, fighting with the guard, missing the performance, and, finally, the call. The entire time, she stays with me, hoof on my shoulder. Once I finish my story, she nods, gives me a quick hug, then sends me to my room. As I head up the stairs, she says one final thing.
"Every mare, stallion, and foal has a flaw, Vinyl. The ones who become great, like the Elements of Harmony, or the Princesses? Those are the ones who figure out how to overcome, or negate their flaw. You are capable of being a great pony, Vinyl. And you've already taken your first steps."
Apparently done, she picks up her yarn and needle again, returning to her work as if she never left it.
I head upstairs to my room, lay down with my favorite pillow, and think about what she said, until I fall asleep.
End
Author's Note
Hi all. This is the first Night of Column's Comforts. Inspiration is drawn from Eile Monty's 'I Am Octavia'
Let me know what you think in the comments below. Also, if you're interested in either suggesting a story for me to use, or proofreading for me, PM me. Thanks again.
"Every mare, stallion, and foal has a flaw, Vinyl. The ones who become great, like the Elements of Harmony, or the Princesses? Those are the ones who figure out how to overcome, or negate their flaw. You are capable of being a great pony, Vinyl. And you've already taken your first steps."
Good advice, I think at least. I hope she does sort things out with her friend.
In case you haven't guessed yet, I'm Column. You can just call me Niccy though, if you like. I own this little hotel on the inner edges of Manehattan proper, called Column's Comforts. Used to be a seedy old place before I bought it. But, after some hard work, I'd turned it into something at least pleasant.
Ah, but here I am going on about unimportant things again. I'm just supposed to give you all my little expository opening to help inform everypony of the important details. Back to my night back then.
I yawn, wincing slightly as my jaw cramps. Setting aside my crocheting, I carry my mug into the small kitchen just off the main lobby.
I set my cup in the sink, and start to idly wash it by hoof, an action I find comforting and relaxing.
As I do so, I let my mind wander back to Vinyl. She did indeed do the right thing, realizing and owning up to her mistakes, but I worry it may be a case of too little, too late. But I guess only time will tell. Life's boring if you know what's going to happen ahead of time.
I blink, and realize I'm humming an old tune as I wash.
"No, I'm not thinking about my time there." I tell myself, forcing the infectious tune back into the depths of my mind.
I finish washing my mug in silence, putting it away as I yawn again.
"Sheesh... I'm really tired... Might as well head to bed now." I say to myself as I make my way up the stairs towards the attic room I sleep in. It's small, but comfortable for me. Deep, plush carpet, soft, blue walls, and my pegasus down bed.
Settling down on top of the bed, I systematically remove my mane and tail ties, setting them on the small bedside table that also holds a simple reading lamp. Then I float up a simple brush, removing knots and tangles slowly and steadily.
I sigh at the pleasant sensation, before finally setting the brush aside with my hair accessories.
Quickly, I scoot under the blanket before rolling over and curling up in my bed.
'Join in our utopia...'
"AAaagh-" I quickly slam a hoof over my mouth to muffle my screams before I wake my patrons, heart pounding rapidly in my chest.
As my heavy breathing starts to calm down, I lay my head back against my pillow, feeling the clammy cold sweat on it's surface.
Swallowing, I close my eyes, talking myself down from the experience, "Shhh... Calm down, Niccy ol' girl... It's just a dream, it can't hurt you now that you're awake... That's not you anymore..."
As my breathing slows, I look over at my alarm clock. "1:30? I only slept a half hour?" I sigh, slowly rising from my bed, idly checking my flank. "Yep... blank, like it should be..." I grab my towel with my magic, heading towards the attached bathroom.
I close the door, hanging my towel on the back as I step into the small shower. I brace myself as I turn the knob, flinching at the first cold spray before it warms to a temperature just above body temp. Sighing, I dip my head under the spray, soaking my blonde mane and lime green coat.
"Why is it always that one... Why not one about Mr. Lance... or... anything else?" I mutter to myself as I wet myself down, turning to make sure my tail is thoroughly soaked. "Well, I know why I guess... nothing else affected me quite like her."
I sigh as I levitate over my shampoo. Popping the top open, I gently drizzle it on to my mane and coat. "I've never really been so... used before, which is why it bothers me so much, thus, nightmares... I just wish they'd at least let me get more sleep."
As I stand under the water, slowly lathering up the shampoo in my coat, my mind wanders back to that first fateful day on the edge of the desert.
I sit down, finally leaving the desert behind me. I'm tired, thirsty, hungry, and lost. My legs go weak and I fall to my side, hooves limply laying in front of me. I think to myself, 'This is how I'm going to die, just a nameless mare on the far edge of the desert. Wonder what the afterlife is like?' My eyes flutter closed, and I fall into unconsciousness.
I come to my senses a few hour later and weakly get my hooves underneath me. Looking around, I spot a lavender shape moving towards me. "H-hello?" I manage to spit out before a coughing fit sends me back to my knees.
When I can finally look up again, the shape is moving rapidly towards me. It's... a mare? With a highly vibrant mane. She gallops up to me, a long stick floating next to her. She's a unicorn, with a mane made up of blues and a pale sea-foam green.
"Oh my gosh, dear! Are you alright?" She asks in a worried voice as she lifts me onto her back. "Don't worry, I'll get you some help."
That's the last thing I hear as I end up passing out, staring at her odd cutie mark. An equals sign.
As I come to my senses, the first thing I notice is that I'm laying on a lumpy bed under a scratchy set of sheets. It's much better than the desert sand though. As my eyes open, I see the simple wooden roof behind the also simple wooden rafters.
My head is pounding, but I don't feel like I'm about to die anymore. Looking around, I see that the room is sparsely furnished. Besides the bed I'm in, there's only a simple mirror and stone water basin. Apparently this is just a guest room of sorts.
Slowly I lift the sheets of me, carefully getting on my hooves. I look like I've been thoroughly washed and cleaned. My coat is shiny and vibrant, my mane no less stunning.
As I stand here contemplating myself in the mirror, I hear the door open. Turning, I see the mare from before step into the room, a pleasant smile on her face as she sees me standing.
“Oh good, you're awake and able to stand!”
I smile as speak, “Oh, you're the mare that I saw on the edge of the desert. Thanks for saving me.”
She trots over, nuzzling the side of my face as talks. “I'm just glad you're alright. I was afraid you wouldn't make it. Welcome to my little house on the edge of town. I hope you don't mind staying around for a day or two, just until we're sure you're alright. I actually just finished cooking dinner.”
My stomach growls as soon as she mentions food, and I blush. “Dinner sounds good, if that's alright.”
I blink. When did the water get so cold?
I return to myself and realize I've been under the water for almost an hour as I quickly shut it off. Shivering, I grab my towel and start drying myself quickly.
As I step out of the shower, I ponder what I'm going to do at almost 3 in the morning. I doubt even Celestia would be awake at this point. Maybe I should get a breakfast started for my guests.
I return from a nearby 24 hour grocery store, foodstuffs floating along behind me. I set them all down on the counter, quickly separating them with my magic. Fruit in that bowl. Jams, jelly, butter, and peanut butter near the toaster. Bread and bagels on the other side of the toaster. Biscuits, haybacon, and hayfries in the oven to cook. A gallon of pancake batter near the stove top to be made later. Finally, all the juices, milk, teas, coffees, and water next to the miniature water heater and the cups there.
Looking around, everything seems to be in the right place. I move over to the water heater, filling it to the top with a pitcher and turn it on. Next, I grab a frying pan and a large pot from the wall of utensils hanging from hooks screwed into the wall. I place the pan on the stove and start the flame under it. Opening the fridge, I grab two dozen eggs and a stick of butter. I close it behind me, grabbing a butter knife as I also unwrap the butter and place the eggs on the counter. Cutting off a small pat of butter, I toss it into the pan and grab the first three eggs.
For the next half hour, I prepare batch after batch of scrambled eggs, then follow them up with pancakes, which I stack in the pot. I take my tray of eggs and rest them next to the bread as I pull the trays out of the oven, placing them all in a line near the eggs. Then I slide the pancakes into the oven to keep them warm.
It is at this point that I realize that I've just accomplished some major stalling. Looking around, I've just finished breakfast for a group of ponies that most likely isn't waking up for another few hours.
My memories must be really bothering me. I move out into the lobby area and sit down on the couch. The fire's gone out, but the embers still glow faintly. As I stare into them, memories start to flow again, and I let them wash over me.
“That was a wonderful meal, Starlight. Thank you again for everything you've done for me today.” I say as she shows me around the two parallel lines of buildings that make up her little town. It's very deserving of the word little, but at the end are more buildings being built as we speak. It's then that I notice something odd about the other ponies around town.
“Starlight, I've been meaning to ask... Why does everypony have the same cutie mark as you do?” I say, pointing at a mixed group of ponies working on one of the houses.
“Oh, that.” She turns watches them for a moment, a small, warm smile on her face as they work to finish up the frame for another house. “It's what sets our town apart from the rest of Equestria, at least for now. Everypony here gave up their cutie mark to better their friendship. You see, I find that special talents tend to cause more arguments than not. This way, we are all equal, with nothing for anypony to feel jealous or smug about.”
“Ah...”, I say as I self-consciously glance at my own blank flank. “I guess that means I'll be leaving as soon as you think I'm alright? Since I don't have a cutie mark to give up...”
She looks at me with that same warm smile, shaking her head a bit, “Of course you're welcome here if you wish to stay. We can still make you equal, all thanks to the Staff of Sameness.” She gently places her hoof on my cheek, looking deep into my eyes. “Here, you'll be accepted, no matter what. That's what this town is, Miss Evermore, acceptance and equality. Nopony will judge you, you have my word of that.”
I blink, hearing something. Creaking and hoofsteps on the stairs, sounds like my guests are about to come downstairs.
I carefully get onto my hooves full of pins and needles, then head to the kitchen. I start pulling everything out in preparation for breakfast. Then I seat myself on a cushion as I wait for the guests to arrive. They trickle in slowly; I only get around 8 guests at any given time. I watch Miss Scratch tiredly put together a plate of food. Seems the late night has affected her. She turns and gives me a brief wave before setting her plate on a table and sitting down to eat.
Behind Vinyl is a deep blue pegasus stallion, with a two tone mane in two shades of blue. His cutiemark is a half moon. He's one of my few regulars, Half Moon, though he sometimes goes by Helping Hoof. He's a good friend, even if he is a little goofy sometimes.
Those two are followed, eventually, by a young couple from out of town. They, in turn, are followed by an earth pony mare quietly singing under her breath as she waits in line.
Seeing that everything is in order, I move to the front desk, preparing to accept keys and give some keys to new guests. While I wait, I begin thinking about my daydreams again.
It's been three months. I've lived here under Starlight's equality happily in that time. I have my own simple house, with it's simple furnishings. Life here is happy, if simple. But above all; Life is quiet here.
Then we got a few newcomers, a pair of pegasi and earth ponies accompanying a unicorn and... my Celestia, an Alicorn...
I recognize her. She's Princess Twilight. Which makes the others her friends. I grew up on stories about these 6 mares. Each one unique and wonderful in her own way, made better only in eachother's presence. The Elements of Harmony.
I see one of the other townsfolk lead them to Starlight's house at the end of town, and I'm excited. It's always nice to make new friends, and who better to be friends with than the Elements and the Princess of Harmony herself?
“Equestria to Column. You in there, Niccy?”
I come to as somepony taps on the tip of my horn lightly with their hoof. Blinking, I realize it's Half Moon.
“Oh, sorry Halfy. Lost in thought, you know how it is.” I look around, making sure he's the only one waiting on me. “Didn't mean to make you wait, just a lot on my mind.”
He gives me a brief frown of concern before beaming brightly at me. “That's ok, Niccy, I'm not in a rush or anything. You know me, I always get up earlier than I need to.” He says this as he stretches his wings.
I catch myself staring at them and force myself to focus on his face as my cheeks warm slightly. “So, what did you need? Disappearing for a few days again?” I ask. I know Half's been planning a trip out of town for a while now. But he sometimes just says the most amusing things when you ask him questions he knows you know the answers to.
“Yeah, gonna go minotaur wrestling out in the Badlands.” He replies cheekily as he places his key on the counter.
I smirk, floating the key onto the proper hook on the back wall. “Make sure you get a good scar out of it, mares love a stallion with scars, you know.” We both laugh at the stupid joke before I continue, “But seriously, be safe, ok? The place just isn't the same when you're not here, you know.” I lean over the counter, giving him a quick hug and getting one in return.
He smiles, idly waving a wing as he talks, “Aww, Colly, you know that being careful sucks all the fun out of trips. But I guess I could make an exception for you, silly filly.” He punctuates the statement by ruffling my mane with his hoof, making me giggle slightly before I fix it.
“Thank you for deigning to acknowledge my request, oh mighty Moony.” I say. I wave to him as he walks out the door before returning to my silent vigil.
An hour or so passes with me cleaning up the kitchen/dining area after breakfast. While I'm busy cleaning out mugs, Vinyl wanders in, looking around until her eyes lock onto me. “Hey, Colly! There you are.”
She walks up to me, looking at what I'm doing. “Dishes huh? Total drag.” She smirks as she looks me in the eyes. “I just wanted to make sure I said thanks to you before I rolled out of here. You didn't have to listen to me whine at you and you definitely didn't have to give me a free room.”
I open my mouth to speak, but she gently closes my mouth with her hoof. “Nope, none of that now, girl. I know you did it to help, but I gotta pay my dues.” She floats a small bag out of her saddlebags, putting it on the counter next to the mugs I'm cleaning. “This is for the room. Sorry, but I don't have enough bits on hand to pay for a therapy session on top of the room.” She grins as she finishes and heads out.
“So, what now?” I ask her. “Did Octy get back to you?”
She turns, looking at me with a smile of both happiness and relief. “Yeah, she left me a message this morning. I don't think I'll be around here as often. A lot of my nights for next few months are gonna be booked solid.” Then she turns and walks out the door.
I look after her for a while, before turning back to the counter of mugs. I finish cleaning them and stack them in the cabinet above the sink. Finally, I open the little bag Vinyl left me. It's got about 20 bits in it, along with the key to her room. Smiling, I take the key out, close up the bag, and make my way back to the front desk.
Author's Note
FINALLY! Stupid muse kept running off to get drunk. Anyway, here's chapter two of Column's Comforts.
I was so excited when I saw a pony that looked like my OC in the two-parter of season 5. Internet cookies to those who can find her. :D
Anyway, I'm going to try to update this more regularly. Also, in response to the multiple complaints about the ambiguous Vinyl/Octy situation at the end of the first chapter, I hereby give you a slightly less vague, but still vague, response. :P
Once again, if you can think of anypony that could use a stay at Column's Comforts, let me know. You can choose yourself or characters from other author's stories. Just let me know who owns the character so I can ask them before I go writing their character.
Half Moon is the OC of a good friend of mine. Lemme know if you wanna see more of him.
Thanks again, and don't hesitate to leave any constructive criticism you may have.
Nicole Evermore.
Update: Corrected a wrong word used.
