Chapters A Sweet Song Hits a Sour Note
Stupid.
Stupid.
Stupid.
A few more tears trickled and tickled their way down her nose, but she didn’t let them fall off. She buried her face into her pillow too quickly for that to happen.
The school’s little hall swam a little before her eyes, but she steadied herself on the microphone. She was fine. She was going to be fine.
There was nopony else here, except for Ms Cheerilee. The mulberry mare gave her that gentle smile of hers, and nodded.
“Go on, Sweetie Belle!” she called out.
Okay.
She could do this.
She closed her eyes, just in case she couldn’t.
“Hush now, quiet now, it’s time to lay your sleepy head…”
She was still thankful that the musical had picked a nice, quiet ballad for one of their songs.
She peeked open one eye. A smile was slowly spreading across Ms Cheerlee’s face that was lighting up the whole room with its glow.
“Hush now, quiet now, it’s time to go to bed…”
She sniffled, and reached out a hoof to the box that was by her side.
Chocolate.
Her friend. It understood her.
It made her feel better about herself.
It filled that empty feeling inside…
“Drif-ting off to sleep, leave exciting day behind you…”
She had her eyes wide open now, and she was beginning to tap her hoof like she did all those times back in her room or at Rarity’s place. The gentle, flowing beat made itself known in every sway of her hips and every wiggle of her shoulders.
She was going to do it!
“Drif-ting off to sleep, let the shores of dreamland find you…”
She reached out for another of her sweet, little friends.
They had been with her for a few days now, their smooth richness coating her tongue every time those… those memories came back.
Rarity was right: chocolate was a mare’s best friend.
Oh no.
She spotted them.
There, in the back of the room, stood two little fillies. One, light pink, with a gaudy tiara perched atop her mane. The other, light grey, with a pair of glasses standing snootily on the top of her nose.
Her insides froze.
They both grinned.
“Hush… now! Quiet… now…”
It was all she could choke out. They were watching! She couldn’t perform in front of them!
“S’time to… oh…”
Ms Cheerilee’s face said it all.
She sent her little friend on a journey, sliding down to join countless others in her tummy.
She sniffed.
She needed another one.
The mulberry mare’s smile faded to nothing, and she gently shook her head.
Sweetie Belle felt the tears brewing, as Ms Cheerilee looked at her with her eyes just pouring sympathy.
“I’m sorry, Sweetie Belle,” she said, walking over to the stage. “I’m afraid that you haven’t made it.”
Sweetie Belle blinked to clear her eyes. Her teacher was standing right before her, now, up on the stage and with her hoof outstretched.
She accepted the hug.
Another friend slipped away to her belly. A little spark of warmth burned there for just a moment.
She smothered it with another wave of sobs.
She pushed her muzzle into her pillow.
It just wasn’t fair .
“Sweetie Belle?”
Her ears perked at the muffled voice, and she pulled her face out of the pillow. It sounded... familiar .
A Sweet Song Hits a Sour Note
“Sweetie Belle?”
Rarity gently tapped the door, but refrained from doing it too loudly.
At any other time, she would have been delighted to have such an extensive amount of work waiting for her in her inspiration room. All her creative juices flowing and blending and mixing together, as spools and ribbons and pieces of fabric whirled with effortless grace around her, eventually returning to her ponnequines in the shape of beautiful dresses and suits.
Truly, if it were an opera, it would be worthy of Neighthoven!
But with her darling little sister so torn by… by…
Good gracious! How could she have been so busy as to have missed what was causing Sweetie Belle all of this trouble. What sort of horrible sister was she?
Oh, if only Mother and Father were here instead of on vacation again. Just how many of those can two ponies need in one year?
It was the school’s musical production! That was it! And, obviously, Sweetie Belle had the most adorable voice of any filly in all of Equestria, so of course she would—
Oh no.
Oh no.
She hadn’t…
“Sweetie Belle?” she repeated, allowing just a little hint of a wobble into her voice. Just enough to show that she was concerned for her sister. She had truly meant for that little tremble to be there.
Truly.
“Rarity?”
Sweetie’s croak was worse than a thousand misplaced pins being left in the posteriors of her garments.
“Sweetie Belle,” she said, in as gentle a voice she could muster. She had to do it. For Sweetie, the most lovely, gentle-hearted filly in the world. “I know your upset darling…”
Oh, she couldn’t ask her to move on just yet. That would be simply callous of her!
“… but, if you were to let me come in, we can talk about it. Would that be all right?” she asked, with just the right amount of lilt in her voice.
Well done, Rarity. You may breath again.
“Okay, Rarity…” said Sweetie, her voice sounding just a little… thick . Like she was chewing on something.
Chewing?
No. She couldn’t worry about that now.
She wrapped her magic around the door handle, and gently twisted it open.
“Oh, Sweetie,” she breathed, closing her eyes and allowing her smile to let loose. “You don’t know how worried I’ve been about you these past few days.”
She opened her eyes.
She had to peer through a gloom, as Sweetie had obviously left the curtains closed all this time. The poor darling… she knew exactly how it felt to just want to block out the world and escape from all its nastiness.
Oh, she just wanted to hug and cuddle and kiss Sweetie Belle and make everything all better for her. That was what good sisters should do, and, by Celestia, she was a good sister!
Ahem.
But first, she had to find her.
On the bed would be a good start, but she found her eyes being dragged downwards by a number of little paper trays, filled with foil shapes. And little shards and smears of brown.
So… that was where her stash had gotten to.
No matter. This was Sweetie Belle, and it was Sweetie Belle in her hour, or days, of need. She could have them.
Even if it made her lip twitch for a moment. Those were Docktsch specials!
Ahem.
Up on the bed, there were a few more little trays, which circled a great nest of pillows and blankets and cuddly toys and all sorts of warm, fluffy things that just tore at her heartstrings even further.
Oh, Sweetie… I’m so sorry…
And, lying on the top of this little mound, her big, shiny, utterly adorable eyes staring up at her and mesmerising her with their sweetness, was Sweetie Belle.
With chocolate smeared across her lips.
“Hi, Rarity,” she mumbled, staggering to her hooves.
It took all her love for her sister and her years of learned self-control for Rarity to not pop her eyes out.
A Sweet Song Hits a Sour Note
She…
Ha…
Eyes focused. Smile sweet. Forehead vein not pulsing. Lip not twitching.
She’s gotten fat!
No.
No, that was overstating it. Badly. How dare she think something like that about her sister. How dare she give a filly of that age the worst possible insult !
Oh, Rarity.
Sometimes she didn’t even deserve a sister.
“Oh, Sweetie ,” she whispered, taking a step forwards. Sweetie Belle tilted her head down shyly, her huge eyes pointing at the floor.
She has a double chin!
Ahem .
No.
No, she most definitely did not have a second chin.
There was maybe a little hint of something bunching there, yes. And maybe a hint of something thicker around her thighs.
And a little more than a hint of something soft around her tummy.
But that wasn’t important! None of that was important!
What was important was Sweetie Belle’s big, shiny eyes, and how close they were to spilling tears all over the floor.
Sometimes , Rarity…
“Come here, darling,” she murmured, dipping her head down, offering her warmest smile and hoping to Celestia that Sweetie spotted it.
She did.
But it did nothing to stop those budding tears. Or the claws tearing at Rarity’s heart.
“Rarity!”
All Rarity could see was a white blur, which slammed into her and clasped itself around her neck.
Oh, Sweetie…
She wrapped her own hoof around her sister’s back. Gently. Lovingly. Like any good sister would.
With equal gentleness, she stroked Sweetie’s back, feeling her breathing calm just the slightest amount. And the little hints of softness under-hoof.
And just how heavy she was.
Yes, she had definitely indul—
No .
This was not the time to be thinking about that, Rarity. And she knew it!
Sweetie sniffled, and gave a shudder that rocked the pair of them and caused Rarity’s lip to wobble. No. It’s didn’t do that.
Honestly.
But she did have to act.
“Shh-shh-shh…” she soothed, lifting her hoof to run it through Sweetie’s curly mane, tempting out those eyes even though she knew what they would do to her.
Just as she thought. The moment she spotted those green orbs wobbling with tears…
Remember Rarity. Be strong for her. Hold back your own. Keep that smile straight.
Oh, all right, maybe she could just allow her lips to purse. And her eyes to blink rapidly.
She stroked Sweetie’s mane again, just holding back the sheer effort it took to look into those eyes and not break down with her like a total drama queen.
“What happened, Sweetie?” she asked, offering another smile she hoped was far sweeter than those chocolates.
Actually, maybe not. Those had cost a pretty penny.
Rarity!
Sweetie’s lip trembled, and it did the same to Rarity’s resolve. Sweetie looked away.
Good, now this makes it a little… easier.
She turned back, eyes now closer than ever to brimming.
Or not.
“I don’t know , Rarity,” Sweetie choked. A pair of tears slipped out of her eyes. Plenty more of them followed. “I ju… I…”
It was all her little heart could take, and it was all Rarity needed to cuddle her again. Tightly, this time. Helping her squeeze out those awful feelings while she kept her expression calm and strong, just as her sister would need.
All right, maybe she wasn’t completely stoic. After all, if Big Macintosh could shed a tear at his sister’s sadness, then she certainly could too!
Or more than just one.
And let her own lip wobble.
She held her sister as she cried against her, silencing her own inhibitions about Sweetie smearing chocolate over hear coat. Just a day after a spa visit.
No. Sweetie’s happiness was far, far more important than any spa visit, or her mountain of work, or anything else she could think of.
She brought her head down, and kissed the top of Sweetie’s.
Sweetie was her sister. And she would do anything to make her sweet little smile come back out again.
At the touch of her lips, Sweetie stopped her shuddering, and looked up. Her eyes were no longer full of sadness, but each of the raw, red lines that cracked around their edges was matched by a cut through Rarity’s heart.
Oh, who could have done this to her innocent, sweet little sister?
But that would have to wait. After all, Sweetie required delicacy.
“Feel better, hmm?” she asked, widening her smile as far as she could without letting it seem strained.
“Uh-huh.” Sweetie Belle sniffed again, but she did give her a smile. Even if it wobbled almost as dreadfully as it did before.
“Come on, Sweetie,” she murmured, with just a tiny hint of persuasion. “Why don’t we talk about this?”
She took a momentary glance behind herself, and sat down as she saw there was no mess to get herself into. She patted the carpet next to her, and Sweetie’s smile warmed her heart so well that she failed to notice that little swell of her rump spreading outwards.
Oh, for goodness …
She put her hoof around Sweetie again. Gently this time. She was back to being the mature, calm older sister that Sweetie needed at this moment. Sweetie nuzzled against her.
She had got it right!
But this was merely the beginning. So that spurt of pride could stop right were it was.
Right. She could do this. She just had to remember to be gentle with her.
“What happened, Sweetie,” she whispered.
Sweetie looked down again. She was possibly being pulled by her enormous eyes.
Too harsh. Well done, Rarity.
“I… I just…”
Her voice faded, and Sweetie pressed against Rarity’s side. Never before had she felt more compelled to throw her hooves around her and pull her into a big, tight, sisterly hug. But she didn’t. That wasn’t what she was going for, today.
She settled for another stroke through her mane. And another. And another.
And as many as it took for Sweetie to answer the questions that burned deep within her. What in Equestria could make her sweet, friendly little sister hide herself away for days? What would want, or dare to make her cry? What would make her seek out the comfort of over a hundred bits’ worth of imported chocolates?
Ahem.
Not the time, Rarity.
This was about Sweetie Belle. She was upset. No, she was terribly upset. Frightfully , even.
Those chocolates didn’t matter; none of this mess did. If only she could see Sweetie smile again…
But she would have to be patient.
The seconds ticked by, with nothing but the sound of Sweetie’s mane softly rustling under her gentle hoof.
“I…”
Come on, Sweetie.
“I just…”
That’s it, darling.
She moved her hoof again, back to resting around Sweetie.
“I just choked .”
What.
She had to stop herself from going stiff. After all, Sweetie was upset. This wasn’t the time for such… coldness.
Even so, she had choked . Choked ?! And Sweetie called her a drama queen!
Ahem.
“I don’t know what happened, Rarity,” Sweetie continued, in that voice of hers that wobbled and cracked and nearly did the same to whatever was holding Rarity’s expression together. “I was doing everything like you said to! I kept my breathing under control… I held onto the microphone when I needed to… I even kept my eyes shut most of the time!”
Her voice cracked. Her green eyes stared directly into Rarity’s blue, all wide and shiny and wobbling and endlessly cute, supported by a quivering chin.
Oh, she could be forgiven. A thousand times over. For whatever it was she said. Or implied.
Oh, Sweetie…
Sweetie let her gaze fall to the floor. A tear join it a moment later, but it was the only one. Which was good news for Rarity’s heart.
“But…” she mumbled, her voice heavy. It called for another stroke. “But I saw some… some ponies in the audience.”
The poor darling…
She meant that. Truly, she meant that.
“And… I-I just froze up!” she croaked. “I could hardly breath anymore!”
She cringed even further. Rarity felt her own lip wobble. Just the once.
Twice.
“And then Ms Cheerilee came over…”
Enough was enough!
She was just… just torturing poor Sweetie, now!
“Shh…” she soothed again, wrapping both her hooves around Sweetie. She meant to do that.
Eventually.
“It’s all right, Sweetie Belle. I know exactly how you feel, but not to worry, everything will be fine.”
She gently rocked her little sister, like their mother had done with her all those years ago.
Months ago, actually. There was that fashion shoot that blighted her memories.
“How’ll everything be ‘fine’?” Sweetie Belle cried. She just about refrained from turning her big eyes onto Rarity again. “Those ponies… they were laughing at me…” Rarity gently nuzzled the top of Sweetie’s head.
Oh, Sweetie…
“I guess I’m just not cut out to be a singer…”
Despite everything, despite her years of learning to control her emotions, Rarity did jump this time.
No.
No. No. No!
“No, Sweetie, I refuse to let you tear yourself up like this,” she said, allowing a little bit of force back into her voice. Just a little, though. She didn’t want to shake any lingering tears free. “Why, you’re a far better singer than any of those ponies! You have the most adorable voice, Sweetie…”
She rubbed her cheek across Sweetie’s forehead, and smiled down at her. She couldn’t bring one out in her sister, though.
“You’re just saying that ‘cause you have to,” Sweetie mumbled, every voice crack doing the same to Rarity’s heartstrings. Again. “You’re my sister…”
“Yes, I am your sister, Sweetie.” She nuzzled her again. “But that just means I have more opportunity to hear your singing.” She gave her a soft smile. “Believe me, Sweetie, you have the voice of Cade-” No. She couldn’t say that . That was much too… trite.
“The voice of Cadence?” ventured Sweetie, the barest hints of a smile on her lips.
Time to make them grow and flourish, Rarity.
“Better,” she said, putting a hoof under Sweetie’s chin. “You have a voice that would melt her heart , Sweetie.”
Rarity’s nearly did the same. Underneath the huge, shiny eyes and behind the wobble, there certainly was a smile on Sweetie’s face.
A small one, yes. One that she might still be worried about if she saw Sweetie wearing it at the end of a school day, and then would most definitely not bite her hooves all afternoon over whether to check up on her. But it was a start, at least.
“Thanks, Rarity,” Sweetie said—no, wait, she chirped —before wrapped her hooves around Rarity.
She smiled. They both smiled.
“It’s nothing, darling,” Rarity murmured, back to running her hoof through Sweetie’s mane. She planted a kiss there, too. “It’s just a matter of getting your confidence up.”
Yes. That would be all of it, wouldn’t it? If only she could get Sweetie to feel more secure in her own ability, then certainly she would be able to show it off more easily. The there would be no more heartbreaking routines like this, no more masses of bits disappearing into Sweetie’s mouth, and Sweetie would get to show the whole of Equestria what a truly wonderful little filly she was!
It was brilliant. The perfect Rarity plan!
All it needed was somewhere to start, though.
She flicked her gaze over to the curtains. Though they were still closed, and she held back using her magic on them during such a… tender moment, the little slivers of glorious sunshine that slipped through the gaps gave her an idea.
“And I know exactly where you can go for that, Sweetie.”
A Sweet Song Hits a Sour Note
“Ah-ah-ah! Hold on a moment, Sweetie!”
She stopped in her tracks, hooves scuffing against the ground like they wanted to just keep running and to find her friends. Taking one last look at the wide, open street, she turned and walked back to her sister.
Every step made her hooves twinge, and dull aches that had nothing to do with the ones in her chest throbbed in her legs.
Maybe she had spent too long just lying around on her bed. And eating chocolates. And feeling pretty miserable…
No. She wasn’t supposed to be thinking about that now. Even if it still felt like there was a whole in her chest, she was supposed to be thinking happy thoughts.
And Rarity’s warm, soft smile made it just a little easier to do that.
“Come along, Sweetie…” said Rarity, a frilly hanky hovering in her blue glow. “We can’t have you being a mucky-pup when your friends see you.”
“I guess not…”
She didn’t even move her head back as Rarity softly rubbed the cloth over her mouth. Something awful was just eating at her insides.
It had been days since she’d seen Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. How were they feeling? Were they just as upset as her about the audition? Were they… were they…
She gulped, and there wasn’t even anything sweet left on her lips for her to try and distract herself with.
Were they going to be angry with her?
She pulled her eyes up from where they had dropped to, and aimed them squarely at Rarity’s. Something made her sister look all blurry. Again.
“But what if they don’t want to see me?” she asked, her voice cracking.
Rarity opened her mouth, but closed it before she could say anything. She smiled, and her eyes softened.
“Oh, Sweetie,” Rarity said, but her voice was more like a whisper. Sweetie felt her sister’s forelegs wrap around her again.
Just being held there, with Rarity’s hooves gently stroking her forehead, made that empty feeling inside seem a whole lot smaller.
She pressed her head against her sister’s warm fur. She didn’t want this to end. She didn’t want to feel all cold and empty and lonely again.
“Don’t you go thinking such nonsense, darling,” Rarity said, pulling away. She softly kissed her cheek. She was still smiling, and the way her eyes twinkled made Sweetie’s middle feel all nice and warm again. “I’m sure they’re just dying to see you again.”
“I guess you’re right, sis,” Sweetie said. She stood up just a little bit straighter.
Of course the others would be happy to see her again! They were the Cutie Mark Crusaders Best Friends For Life!
She could just imagine their smiles now…
It was enough to make that empty feeling get even smaller!
Rarity tittered, and nuzzled her again.
“Of course, Sweetie,” she whispered. “Now run along and enjoy yourself!”
Her smile was more of a smirk, now, and Sweetie couldn’t help but match it.
She turned and galloped away, her heart singing again. “See you later, Rarity!” she called over her shoulder, before setting her sights firmly on Sweet Apple Acres.
The houses and smooth streets slipped away, and a rough track bordered by apple trees took their places.
She panted. She didn’t remember the trip to Apple Bloom’s being this hard before.
Licking her lips, she stole a glance at the sun. It didn’t seem to be burning any brighter…
She shook her head. What was she thinking?
Princess Celestia would never do anything like that!
Her leg twinged again. That was it. She’d been in bed for days, and her legs weren’t used to running again, yet.
It was just her being stupid again.
Stupid.
Like she’d been at the audition…
She stumbled.
Thinking about Rarity’s smile or Apple Bloom’s or Scootaloo’s or anypony’s wasn’t filling that gap in her heart, any more.
It didn’t help that she’d had to run past her school. And listen to the piano through the open window. And hear the other fillies and colts…
Hear them rocking along to the beats she should be rocking along to. Hear them having a blast belting out the tunes she should be belting out. Hear them being in the musical that she should have been in…
If only she could rock out, or belt out, or have anything to do with a musical…
She stopped, and squared her legs. Her lips screwed up into a frown.
One that she aimed at herself.
No. She wasn’t going to let this get to her.
She wasn’t going to let her friends’ first sight of her for days be her crying .
Then again, she couldn’t let it be of a frown the size of Opalescence’s, could she?
Over the unease that still lingered in her chest, she made her lips stretch into what she hoped was a happy little smile.
If only she’d brought some chocolate with her…
By the time she made it into the orchards and out of the sun, she felt a couple of trickles drip off her nose. For the first time in ages they weren’t coming from her eyes.
She licked her lips, and tasted a little bit of salt as well as some cracking.
At least she was in the shade, now, and the crunchy leaves and soft grasses felt much nicer under her hooves than the hard road.
As she slowed to a trot and got her breath back, though, something felt off. The chills in her chest continued to swirl and curdle, and they mixed in with the thoughts that only grew louder as she got closer to the clubhouse.
Would they be angry with her? It had been a solid few days since she’d even spoken to them. That was enough time for… for dozens , maybe even hundreds of cutie mark crusades!
What if… What if they’d…
Something filled her eyes.
And she hadn’t been…
Her lip wobbled.
Stop it.
She shook her head until the trees blurred, and after she stopped she sucked in great gulps of air, just trying to clear her head.
She couldn’t keep thinking like that. Of course they’d be happy to see her! Of course they would!
Right?
Wait.
There it was. Clinging to the trunk of a huge, mature tree, with the new telescope hatch poking out through the leaves up top and a fresh coat of paint covering up all the little patches and cracks, was the clubhouse.
There were voices coming from inside.
They weren’t loud enough, or she wasn’t close enough to hear what they were saying, but they were there.
Her friends were there.
She ran. Her legs moaned and ached, and she was sure she nearly fell over a root that looped out of the ground, but she kept running. She had to see them again. Now .
She scampered up the ramp, breath catching and whistling through her teeth. Her eyes closed as she stopped, and she heaved to catch her breath. Again.
Insides squirming with so many unanswered questions she couldn’t make them out any more, she opened her eyes.
They were both there.
Apple Bloom sat on her rump, pointing a hoof at a pair of cards that were face-down on the floor. Scootaloo lay on her back, legs held limply upwards, her mane sprawling over her own cards.
Both of them stared looked straight at her, their eyes wide and jaws hanging.
In spite of everything, just the sight of the two greatest fillies in the world and the most wonderful friends she could ever hope to have made a great… wave of warmth washed through her chest. It spread up to her muzzle, and blazed a shy little smile across it.
“Hi, guys,” she offered.