The Neighcronomicon

“It’s another beautiful day in Ponyville.” thought Twilight Sparkle. Bright morning sunlight streamed in through the library's windows. Twilight marveled at the peace and quiet. Back in Canterlot, the hustle and bustle would be have become a muted background roar, even this early in the day.

“Spike, what’s for breakfast?” Twilight shouted, stifling a giggle behind her hoof. Knowing Spike, odds were good that that shout was his wake up call. Twilight knew she shouldn't tease him like this, but the morning was so bright and cheery she felt like having just a teensy-weensy bit of fun.

A minute later, however, and a good deal of that morning cheer had vanished.
“Spike? Where are you Spike? Come on, I don’t have time for this! I was just kidding about breakfast…” Twilight shouted. The basement, the bathroom, his bedroom, her bedroom, linen closet, pantry, refrigerator. . . nowhere was there a Spike.

Only after checking the oven for the third time did the scroll on the kitchen table catch Twilight’s eye.
“A message from the Princess? Oh, oh dear, oh no…” Twilight began galloping around the dining table. "What was wrong? Did something happen to Spike? What if it wasn't just Spike, but all the dragons?! Oh no, what if somepony of villainous intent has kidnapped Spike!?! What terrible things would they be doing to Spike?! Maybe it’s a ransom demand, forwarded through the appropriate royal channels!?"

CLANG!

“Ow, what the buck?!” Twilight yelped, rubbing her horn. The new dent in her frying pan was all the answer she needed for that obscene question. “I told Spike not to hang it so low… Oh my goodness, Spike!” Twilight gasped. Grabbing the letter, Twilight deftly undid the ribbon holding it closed and began to read.

My Faithful Student,
Spike is due for his annual check up. Since Ponyville doesn't have a physician with sufficient knowledge of dragon physiology, I took the liberty of teleporting him to Canterlot. Spike should be ready to be sent back in a week or so, as there are a few day length tests the doctors insist they need to run.

Sincerely,

Princesses Celestia

Twilight walked over to her desk as she read the letter a second time.

“Was it really supposed to be today? I didn't see anything on my calendar, and I always check it right before I go to bed.” Twilight muttered. Looking up from the offending scroll, Twilight couldn't help but groan in dismay. Her calendar was hidden from view, swallowed up in a tide of books, parchment, and journals strewn all across her desk.

“Well, uh, hehe that would do it I suppose.” Twilight chuckled bashfully.

“Thank Harmony magic exists, or this would take all day to clear up.”

* * *

“There, all done.” Twilight announced triumphantly. Books away, daffodil sandwich and apple juice ready for breakfast, and if Twilight knew the mailmare’s route. . . A loud thump resonated through the library as something crashed against the door.

“Oof! Gosh-darn depth perception. Uh, Miss Sparkle? It’s me, Derpy Hooves. I've got your mail for you!”

Twilight opened the door and offered Derpy a hoof up from where she sat, rubbing a small bump on her head. “Are you okay Derpy? Do you need me to get you some ice for that bump?”

“Oh, oh no Miss Sparkle, I’m just fine!” Derpy stumbled to her hooves. “I’m more worried about your door, I hope I didn't hurt it too much.” Twilight glanced at the door. “Nope, it looks just fine Derpy.”

“Thank goodness,” Derpy sighed. “I was kinda worried, my boss still isn't happy with me for the whole ‘dropping several boxes of hooftacks’ last Tuesday.”

“Wow. That would explain the hold up outside the market that day.” Twilight awkwardly rubbed her shin. “So . . . can I have my mail?”

Derpy started with a jolt, “Omygoshyes I’m so sorry, making you wait like this!” Rustling in her saddlebags, Derpy drew out smallish bundle of letters wrapped in purple twine the color of Twilight’s coat. “Here! These are yours. I made sure to wrap up all the letters so that I’d give them to the right pony.”

“That’s really creative of you Derpy. Why does this keep going into your bag though?” Twilight tugged at twine that led from her letters to Derpy’s bag. Whatever it was attached to was kinda heavy.

“Huh? Oh, you must have a package.” Another bout of rustling produced a fairly hefty brown paper parcel, also tied up with more of that purple twine.

“Thanks Derpy, I hope you have a good day with the rest of your mail route.”

Pressing the package into Twilight's hooves, Derpy flashed her a great big smile before taking off again. “Thanks Miss Sparkle, I hope you do too!”

Closing the door, Twilight trotted back to her breakfast, flipping through her letters as she went. A letter from her parents, a belated happy birthday card from Shining Armor, a 'Librarians United' monthly newsletter, and a few catalogs. Twilight gave a little huff as she nibbled at the last of her sandwich. "I was really hoping that Able Hazard's letter would come today. He'd been so punctual until lately."

Floating her dishes into the sink, Twilight set the brown package in front of herself. Tugging the tangle of twine off of the parcel, Twilight did a double take when she saw who and where the unassuming package was from.

"Well, I was not expecting this." Twilight muttered. The packaging was worn and weathered from its journey, shipped all the way from Saddle Arabia. When Able Hazard had said his next letter would be a bit late, Twilight hadn't realized it would be because of shipping delays. Written in Hazard's peculiar flowing script was Twilight's address, and a large mess of postage was applied carelessly to a whole third of the wrapping paper.

"For my librarian friend across the sands of space and time." read Twilight. Like Rarity, Able sure had a flair for the dramatic. Delicately pulling the wrapping paper away took all the patience Twilight had. With each bit of paper pushed aside it became harder and harder to keep her breath steady and her magic in control.

"Please don't be a dream, please don't be a dream, please don't be a dream," Twilight pleaded with growing intensity. As the last of the wrapping paper was cast to the floor Twilight could almost feel her heart kick into overdrive. Able had outdone every bookstore owner in Canterlot, Ponyville, maybe all of Equestria. A copy of the Neighcronomicon, the rarest of the rare. Collectors from all over would descend like parasprites at the merest hint that a bookstore might have a copy. And it was all HERS.

“Okay, deep breaths. I just had breakfast, so it won’t hurt to do just a little bit of reading.” giggled Twilight. Glancing up at the clock, Twilight nodded to herself. She had a full two hours before she was supposed to help Rarity by modeling some dresses.
Gently, Twilight opened up the rare tome and began to read.

… I now know what lies beyond Celestia’s Sun and Luna’s Stars. I have seen past the veil woven by our deific patrons, and It too has seen me. I cannot sleep anymore, for It whispers to me now. It has hundreds, thousands, perhaps even an infinite number of names, and I weep and shiver at the sound of each and every one. I will pen these words in the vain hope that this tome will appease It, for in my lust for knowledge I tied myself to It. It demands that I pass on its teachings, and my tears of blood and breath of ash are potent reminders that I cannot refuse. Harken now to my words, as I pass to you the teachings of Wyrak, the Devourer of Hope. . .

* * *

"Twilight? Twilight, darling, please answer the door."
With a start, Twilight looked up from the Neighcronomicon. Craning her neck to stare at the clock, Twilight couldn’t help but let loose a frustrated groan. Her “little bit of reading” had taken up four hours, not two.

“Sorry Rarity, please come right in!” Twilight hollered. Sheesh, her voice came out really raspy there. Closing the Neighcronomicon, Twilight turned the faucet on the sink and set about having a drink of water and tidying up her breakfast dishes.

“Twilight, darling, what happened?” The door to the library gently closed, guided by Rarity’s magic. “I waited and waited for you. Thank goodness I had another dress to complete or this whole afternoon would have been an absolute loss.”

Taking a long draught from the tap, Twilight turned around, shutting off the faucet with a deft twist of telekinesis. “I’m really sorry about that Rarity, but my pen-pal sent me one of the rarest books ever, and I, heh heh, got a little lost reading.”

Twilight knew she had Rarity’s undivided attention; her wide eyes and piercing stare were a firm testament to her awe at Twilight’s great fortune to have the rarest of rare books in her personal possession. Twilight felt herself grinning, and was just about to summarize what she had learned from her initial dive into the Neighcronomicon when she noticed the tears.

“Twilight. . . please don’t talk. It’s hurting me.” Rarity sank to her haunches as tiny sobs escaped from her mouth through the rictus grin of clenched teeth. This was wrong, this was so wrong, and as she hugged herself Rarity couldn’t help but weep.

“Rarity, I don’t understand. How am I-”

“Stop! Oh please, for the love of Luna and all her stars, please make it stop!” Any sense of decorum or etiquette died an unquiet death as Rarity screamed. Collapsing to her side, hind legs tucked tight against her belly, Rarity buried her head against her knees and cried like a foal. Great wracking sobs shook her body, and what had been a trickle of tears became a raging flood.

Twilight stood there, mouth hanging open, still as stone like some sort of gargoyle. Rarity clearly needed her help, but if she couldn’t talk then how could she help? How was she supposed to support her friend like this? The others. She’d go get Fluttershy, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash. If she couldn’t talk then she’d get her other friends to do it. With a burst of magic, Twilight vanished from the library.