Memoirs of a Royal Guard

Completely refreshed from my extra long and mandatory vacation I was more than ready to start work again. Mercifully the pink coat potion wore off without any kind of antidote. Leave it to Runic to have a potion not work as advertised. Not that I would have complained in this case.

“You seem awfully excited about getting back to work,” Iridescence said from across the table. She had a great poker face and was using it on me then. I wasn’t sure if it was because we were playing a game or for some other reason that I didn’t understand.

I smiled a bit and moved my figure closer to a couple of zombies and rolled the dice. “Two hits,” I said and then added, “I am. I love my job.”

Iridescence nodded and moved her figure. “It will be nice to have you come relieve me again. It is odd working with another pony.”

That was certainly true. Not seeing Iridescence at work was strange. I had been seeing her more at home as a result but somehow we had less to talk about. We ended up playing a lot of games. “Agreed. Getting things back to normal will be great.”

“Normal indeed,” she said, rolling the dice. “Speaking of which. We’ve been doing a lot of the same things lately. Would you mind if we did something different for our next date?”

Looking up, I nodded. “Of course not. You let me know what you’d like to do and I’m on board.”

Iridescence smiled and winked. “Great! Also, tomorrow you’re taking Princess Luna to the Equestrian Writers’ Convention.”

“I’m doing what now?” I asked, my attention pulled from the game. “A convention?”

My unicorn companion was grinning widely. “Oh yes. Princess Luna’s favorite author is going to be at the show and she let the Captain know she wanted to go. They both felt like you’re the perfect pony to take her.”

“What exactly does a convention entail?” I asked.

“Oh, you know, nothing too exciting. Just tons of ponies going to panels, booths, and dealer tables. They’ll be chasing autographs from authors. Your mission is to keep the princess safe and, more importantly, be sure she gets to meet C.W.” Iridescence explained. “The rest of us will make sure the venue remains secure.”

I pondered that a bit. Social events were typically Iridescence’s place. If I was there I always just sat in the background. Me alone with the Princess seemed like a strange plan. “Why me?”

Iridescence explained, “Princess Luna feels that in this type of setting one guard is more appropriate and that if it you aren’t chosen to be that guard you’ll probably show up in a silly costume to protect her anyway.”

I blinked. “Really?”

She laughed and shook her head. “No! She just feels safe with you and we both agree you could use more social experiences.”

“We agree? We who?” I asked.

“Luna and I,” she said plainly.

“Princess Luna and you? You discuss me?”

Iridescence got up and softly patted me with a hoof. “Of course. We’re friends and friends discuss their relationships.”

This was getting confusing. “You and Princess Luna are friends? When do you have time to spend time together and discuss me?”

“When I’m on shift of course. You may just stand there all day but when she talks to me I talk back. We’ve really hit it off,” Iridescence explained.

That wasn’t against the regulations but there were dangers in getting too close to the pony that you’re guarding. Of course you could also get in trouble being your partner’s special somepony so who was I to throw stones?

“Very well then. I’ll escort the princess to her rendezvous with this C.W. pony.”

Iridescence laughed and said, “She is just going to go to C.W.’s booth and get an autograph. Try to keep it light.”

Keep it light. It was a social event. I sat quietly, looked at our zombie game, and then planned tomorrow out in my head. I would need a map of the layout, a schedule of events, and information about where the guards would be patrolling. Tomorrow was going to be busy.

***

The Equestrian Writers’ Convention, or EWC as they seemed to call it, was being held in the Canterlot Convention Center. It was, more or less, controlled chaos. There were ponies everywhere navigating narrow thoroughfares trying to get a few minutes with their favorite authors. Some wore costumes and others seemed to have forgotten to bathe. It was a lot to keep track of as I trailed behind Princess Luna.

The Princess seemed to be completely in her element. She stopped at booth after booth meeting ponies and talking shop. Much to my relief most ponies were more interested in the convention than the princess. Several asked to get pictures of her “great Princess Luna cosplay,” whatever that meant. Some ponies even insisted I be in the pictures as well.

“Princess, shouldn’t we be getting to the rendezvous point with C.W.?” I asked.

Looking over her shoulder, the princess said, “She will be there all day Silent Knight. We… I am enjoying the convention. Can’t we simply enjoy it a while longer?”

The look was something I’d never seen before. The Princess was really having fun and I think the idea of rushing through it made her sad. I stuffed the schedule into my saddle bag with all of the Princess’s “swag” and smiled. “It would appear, Princess, that your schedule was just cleared.”

“Thank you,” she said softly and went back to the convention experience. I kept behind her and collected the various things she bought or was given. It was actually kind of fun to see all the colorful booths. There were posters, banners, and displays featuring all types of literature. It was impressive to see and I realized I should probably look into reading more. Being a soldier meant having a sharp mind, not just a sharp sword.

Eventually we found C.W.’s booth and stood in line to meet her. C.W. was a white unicorn with a brilliant blonde mane. There were little hints of pink sprinkled throughout and she had it braided in the back. As I looked at her I couldn't help but think she was somehow familiar. It was as if I’d seen her before but I knew we had not met. I’d have remembered a pretty unicorn with a blonde and pink mane.

When we were about three ponies back C.W. spotted us and seemed to get really concerned. She started hurriedly placing some of her books behind the booth’s table while also signing copies for other ponies. As our turn came she looked up in horror and said, “Princess Luna! What a wonderful surprise.”

Princess Luna was looking past C.W. at a big banner announcing her new book, The Princess of the Knight. Her mouth hung open. The cover featured a white pegasus royal guard holding a blue alicorn princess in his arms, wings spread wide. He even held a sword high in the night sky and was looking rather dashing. It was clearly like one of the romance novels I always saw Iridescence hide in her foot locker.

About that time I noticed Princess Luna looking from C.W. (who stared on in horror for some reason), the banner, and me.

“Princess?” I asked softly since she looked distressed.

“Do thou not see Silent Knight? That is clearly thou and I!” she exclaimed, pointing a hoof at the banner. I looked again and didn’t see it.

“No princess... ” I raised a brow. “That stallion clearly has violet eyes. Mine are silver.”

C.W. stuttered, “P-princess, it is loosely modeled after you. I hope you don’t mind, I’m just such a big fan! Everyone is so tired of the typical ‘Princess of the Sun’ romance. I felt like it is your time to shine, so to speak!”

“Thou are a fan of ours?” Princess Luna asked. “We… I mean, I am a fan of thou. I brought a book for thou to sign. Silent Knight?”

I dug around in the saddle bag and pulled out Princess Luna’s first edition, hardcover copy of The Mare’s Temptation.

C.W. took the book and opened the cover, her cheeks still flushed. “This is a real honor, Princess.” She levitated a quill with her unicorn magic and started to sign.

“What does C.W. stand for?” I asked curiously.

There was a chorus of gasps and I’m pretty sure a mare behind me fainted. Suddenly everyone was staring at me, including Princess Luna.

“What?” I asked, looking around and preparing for an assault.

C.W. laughed softly and shook her head. “No, it’s all right. I’m sure you don’t know but it isn’t normally appropriate to ask an author what their real name is. It helps to protect our anonymity,” she explained.

Tilting my head, I asked, “Anonymity. Like an alias? Like a criminal might have?”

Princess Luna put her hoof over my muzzle and laughed nervously. “Nay, Silent Knight. Authors are celebrities and they don’t have overzealous house guards to protect them.” With her other hoof she tapped the book. “If you could just make that out to Luna…”

C.W. did just that as I stood there quietly.

“Thank you,” the princess said before adding, “Come along. Silent Knight. We would like to see some more booths before we leave.”

I nodded and we started to make our way off along the booth. As we did, C.W. leaned across and offered me a copy of The Princess of the Knight. “Just for you,” she said softly.

Later that evening when I got home, I took a moment to open the book. She had written inside the cover, “Thank you for being a good sport. This will be our secret.  - Crystal Wishes.”

She was right about that. I hid the romance novel in my foot locker.

***

Acclimating to the idea that Princess Luna and Iridescence were friends was proving slightly difficult. The part of my mind that focuses on rules, regulations, and best practices kept tingling. It also didn’t help that the two of them started to spend time together while I was on duty.

“You should invite her to the palace! Make it an official function to honor one of the up-and-coming ponies in literature,” Iridescence said.

Princess Luna shifted on her couch. “I don’t want to come across as a fanmare. It seems too eager to invite her so soon after the convention. There is also the matter that her latest book is clearly about Silent Knight and I.”

Iridescence laughed softly and waved a hoof. “Loosely based. I’ve read about halfway through. She gets Silent Knight all wrong. He is a passionate swashbuckler who makes mares weak in the knees.”

Speak only when spoken to. “I’m right here,” I said quietly.  No pony seemed to notice and that was fine with me.

“Come now, Luna,” Iridescence said so casually. It set me on edge. “If you’d like to meet her, meet her! Give her some small award. She’ll be flattered.”

“Do thou really think so? Would it not be abuse of royal power?” Princess Luna asked.

“Why don’t we ask the expert?” Iridescence mused, turning to me. “Silent Knight, if the princess invites C.W. here to meet her but also gives her an award, would that be an abuse of power?”

I thought that over a bit. “If the award is solely given for the excuse to meet C.W. then yes, it is an abuse. If the Princess intends to create a new award and give it at a regular interval it is perfectly in line. Perhaps an annual award for the best pony author?”

“Verily!” the princess exclaimed as she levitated her quill, ink, and parchment. She leapt from her couch excitedly and crossed to her desk. “Ponies should be rewarded for work well done. We shall create the Equestrian Authors Award to honor one pony each year for their achievements.”

Iridescence got up and went to the desk to watch as the Princess worked. “You could form a committee after this year to help choose the most important literary works of the year and then vote on a winner.”

“That is a wise idea Iridescence,” the princess said as she scribbled away. “We will invite scholars and critics to help… After this year of course.”

It only took a moment before she lifted the parchment and said, “Done! C.W. will be the first Equestrian Authors Award recipient. We must get this into the mail immediately.”

I softly cleared my throat and added, “And create the award.”

Both mares turned to stare at me and then the princess quickly nodded, “Yes, and create the award. I think a medallion shall do. Come along, we have much work to do.”

Iridescence walked next to Princess Luna while I stayed one pace left and two back. It was weird but I supposed times were changing. Who was I to question the magic of friendship.

***

The reporter ponies loved Princess Luna’s idea to create a literature award. It was her first press conference and it went extremely well. Iridescence and I were assigned to keep an eye on the event but there really wasn’t anything noteworthy security-wise.

Everything worked out and within the week C.W. showed up at the palace to accept her award. The ceremony was elegant, brief, and low key despite being held in the throne room. Princes Celestia, Captain Shining Armor, and his fiancee Lady Mi Amore Cadenza were some of the most notable guests. There were also a handful of reporters, critics, and Canterlot elite.

I couldn’t help but notice that C.W. looked pretty nervous throughout the whole thing. Perhaps crowds bothered her. Not every pony is accustomed to being stared at by royalty. She was gracious, however, and her acceptance speech was most kind. She even thanked Princess Luna and I for being inspirations. I’d never been an inspiration before and to be honest I liked the idea of inspiring unicorn ladies.

Eventually the official functions wound down and Princess Luna invited C.W. back to her office to talk shop. That was the goal after all. Iridescence and I followed along for security. Once we were inside I took my position. Iridescence didn’t take hers. Instead she went to the sitting area in uniform. I said nothing.

“With your permission, Princess.” Iridescence said and was quickly given the nod. She took her helmet off, set it aside, and sat down. I guess that was okay.

C.W. looked a bit confused and stopped mid-seat to say, “With your permission, Princess.”

Princess Luna softly laughed and said, “Thou may call me Luna and you may be seated.”

C.W. finished taking a seat and said, “Thank you.”

Iridescence cleared her throat, “As a royal guard I need her permission to deviate from protocol. As her guest, you don’t need to do so. You see some royal guards are strict and completely by the book. They might take exception.”

“Oh I see. Silent Knight won’t be joining us?” C.W. asked.

Princess Luna smiled and started setting out tea. “Silent Knight is one of those by the book royal guards. He likely feels somepony must be on security right now and should I invite him over he would be most uncomfortable. Is that not correct Silent Knight?”

“Yes, Princess,” I said confidently. Somepony had to be on watch.

“Oh,” C.W. said. “What a shame.” Turning back to the princess she added, “Thank you so much for this award. I was worried you would be angry with me after you saw The Princess of the Knight.”

“Angry? No. Confused initially. I am not very accustomed to being… well… included. Fitting in has been a struggle,” Princess Luna admitted.

C.W. nodded knowingly. “That is something I understand well. I almost never published a book because I was worried no pony would understand or like it.” She accepted a teacup that floated to her, taking it over with her own magic. Unicorns made everything look easy.

Princess Luna smiled a bit at that and sipped her tea. “I am glad thou decided otherwise. We rather enjoy thy books, Iridescence and I.”

C.W. looked confused. “Iridescence?”

With a gasp Princess Luna said, “My apologies. How rude of me to forget proper introductions. C.W., this is my friend Iridescence.” She motioned to Iridescence. “Thou also know Silent Knight already.”

Iridescence and C.W. shook hooves while C.W. said, “It is a pleasure to meet you. My name is Crystal Wishes.”

That knowledge seemed to please both the princess and Iridescence.

“If you please, Crystal Wishes, would thou share how thou comes up with thy stories? I write a bit as well, but it would be amazing to learn about thy process.”

Crystal Wishes shifted a bit and said, “I don’t think I do anything special, Princess. I just look for inspiration around me to start. What is something perfectly normal that I can just slightly tweak? Then I build interest in a character and write organically.” She sighed softly and smiled. “I idealize a bit. I write about guards or knights and I hope that one day I can meet a real one like the ones in my fiction.”

Princess Luna tilted her head and pointed a hoof at me. “But thou can. He is right there.”

Iridescence softly snickered and Crystal Wishes blushed. “Oh, no, I mean like the way I make them out to be in the book. I doubt Silent Knight is anything like the brash, passionate, and dark stallions I write about.”

“You’ve certainly got that right,” Iridescence said and then giggled. They all giggled, in fact.

“I’m in the room,” I said softly. No pony seemed to have heard.