I'm Not The Only One

by Just A Fabulous Cat

Rating: teen
Tags: Dark, Sad, Romance
Length: 3092

Sorrow. Anger. Rage. The three main emotions Fluttershy has been feeling ever since Discord's betrayal, soon showing after a nasty fight between the two. Will these fights only get worse until somepony is hurt severely, or will they manage?

Sorrow. Anger. Rage. The three main emotions Fluttershy has been feeling ever since Discord's betrayal. She never thought it would become that way, but it soon showed after a nasty fight between the two, each of them revealing their true thoughts on the situation. Yet with the little good pieces and memories of their relationship that remain, can they mend their bond? Or will the fights only get worse until somepony is hurt severely?

'Dark' tag for the semi dark theme I have in mind, and the 'sex' tag for some mild implications of teh secks. :ajsmug: Also, a collab with Lyra_lover777. Enjoy!

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-26 05:10:07 UTC

You Say I'm Crazy...

          Fluttershy looked down at the dusty old floor of her cottage, her ears flattened and head against a small pillow, her heavy breathing and occasional muffled sob being the only sounds within the room. Even her animals stayed silent. She bit her teeth as she fought back tears with all her might, the harsh words she and Discord had uttered mere minutes ago still ringing in her ears.

          He sat beside her on the couch at the moment, bearing the same look of guilt as he fumbled around with his talons and stared blankly at one of their pictures hanging on the wall.

         She closed her eyes for a moment and let her mind wander, maybe sort everything out while the rest of her remains buried head deep under the fluffy pink fabric of her pillow.

         It was only three days since his 'incident' with Tirek, and they had thought it would've been good to get back on track right away to help mend their friendship as quick as possible. But little did either of them know that it had been damaged to what seemed to be the point of no return, and some tea party wasn't going to help at all.

        In fact, it only made the matter worse.

        As Fluttershy continued to ponder, her eyes opened a bit to study the cracks on the floor–along with the dust bunnies that resided within them. But soon she began to shake a bit as her memories walked through the fight they had only moments ago.

   Fluttershy and Discord sat at the small wooden table in her kitchen, cucumber sandwiches and tea laid between them. She wore nothing but a butterfly clip on her hair for the occasion, almost an identical copy of one of the butterflies that made up her cutie mark. Discord just wore nothing period, or going for 'All Nature-al look' as he had so intelligently put it a few weeks ago.

        Angel, who usually sat by the foot of her chair, was upstairs in her bedroom for this 'party'. He was locked in there for fear of the critter hurting her guest.

         Birds flew in and out from her open windows, tweeting their lovely little songs as they made their way through the cozy home. Other animals also stayed in her house, but she only saw the birds at the moment. The others were probably playing someplace in the living room, where guest houses for them were made available.

        Funny thing is, they basically live in the living room. Guess that room really had a fitting name in her home. Well, in Rainbow Dash's too when she was hungover.

        Getting back on track, Fluttershy notes this was just like–no...–almost like any other tea party, except she was standing on the edge of pure rage and sorrow as she battled herself within the confines of her mind. She does her best to hide it on the outside. Though every time she flashed a smile to her 'friend' she cannot help but look away.

  "I can't believe you... you let me down like that," was all Fluttershy managed to say to break the silence as she sipped on her fairly sweet orange tea. Even then it was barely above a whisper. It probably wasn't even the best thing to say at the moment, but she had had to do something or the quiet would've made her scream.

   Discord had seemed quite taken back by what she said, and had sipped his tea in what she identified as his thinking pose- Discord stroking his beard and looking off into the distance with a determined look. Normally Fluttershy would giggle at this, entertained by his goofy poses, but today she only saw this as him trying too hard. It only served to give her time to rethink her opinions about him.

It wasn't his fault, she thought, watching him take a small bite of the sandwich, Tirek tricked him into it! In fact, you could go ahead and say it's all Tirek's fault Discord even considered giving up our friendship!

That's not true, he's probably been wanting to do that for so long now. That... that big fat meanie can burn in Tartarus for all I care, he betrayed you and took advantage of your kindness by having you forgive him in the end! another part of her retaliated, snarling the words as if they were venom needing to be spat out.

        Fluttershy, upon hearing this, couldn't help but gasp and nearly drop her cup. She prayed that Discord didn't notice as her free hoof instinctively darted up to her lips. He didn't even glance at her, much to her relief, letting her think things through some more.

        She wasn't one for such vulgar thoughts, but the last few days of being alone in her house crying had really changed her. Never had she thought Discord would do such a thing, and she was simply caught off guard with his actions that not only made her question their friendship, but created this... internal conflict that she simply could not settle.

        Soon she was broken out of her thoughts and was forced to look up upon hearing her friend's voice.

        "Fluttershy, I... I now see that friendship really is magic," he said while looking her straight in the eye, a serious look plastered on his goofy face, "and that's something I don't want to lose or just give away. I promise it will never, ever happen again, unless- no, not unless anything. Friendship I promise to cherish forever.”

   He then sipped some more of his tea before tapping his talons against the table's oak frame to fill the silence that had taken over the room.

        Fluttershy's thoughts, on the other hoof, suddenly changed around to accommodate his words, trying to decide whether to accept his apology or snap like a rubber band stretched too far.

That sounded pretty sincere, just go with it. Please. We don't need anymore trouble, plus Discord is our friend.

C'mon, he's obviously lying! Do something about it. And 'friend'? If he was your 'friend', he would be helping you through this rough time and not be playing these stupid  games of his.

I don't think he's lying at all. And I won't provoke anything.

Fine, at least question him without being too suspicious. That can't do too much harm! And if you don't, I'll... dammit, just do it.

Hey, no swearing in my head!

Okay, okay, just do it...

        Fluttershy, consenting to the voice in her head, took a deep breath as she came up with an appropriate question to ask him.

        "Um, Discord, not trying to be rude, really not, but... how can I... well, trust you after what you did?" she asked shakily, looking down with slight twinges of regret in her stomach.

         And soon enough, she fully regretted her decision as she looked up to see his reaction.

        It was almost instantaneously, the damage her words did becoming visible in Discord's eyes as they glistened with guilt and sorrow. Setting down the cup he held, Fluttershy braced herself for the oncoming guilt trip she would have to bare through.

        "I don't know, Fluttershy," Discord said, "I truly, truly don't know..."

        And just like that, she wanted to yell out that she was so, so sorry, then hug him, and proceed to tell him that she trusted him no matter what the darn voice in her head said...

        But then she realized she couldn't bring herself to do it, and it wasn't just because she felt furious at him.

        She remembered just then that she had contacted Celestia yesterday about Discord through a letter, requesting that he be held in Canterlot for a few months to make sure he was 'fully reformed' again.

        Of course that wasn't the real reason she wanted to send him away, but she felt it was the only one the princess would take. The real reason was-

        "But how can I trust you?"

        The words stung to Fluttershy.

        Discord somehow knew what she had done, and now she had to explain. Sighing, she sipped her tea for a good five seconds, savoring the taste on her tongue before it turned bitter with the words she was going to say.

        "Discord, I'm only sending you to Canterlot because we need time apart. Y-"

        Discord cut her off, a hint of anger in his voice as he slammed his eagle talons and lion paw against the table, causing it to shake a little and for Fluttershy to shrink back in her chair with flattened ears.

        "You specifically  said in your letter that you 'need to be watched in case he's thinking of pulling another stunt like the last one.' Fluttershy, I don't think you're trustworthy after what you did behind my back."

        That did it for her. Yes, she admitted what she did was in a way wrong, but Discord has taken it to a whole new level for her. What she did behind his back? Did all the memories of Tirek and her a few days ago just dissipate into the air?

Kill him with fire?

Yes please.

           Fluttershy slammed her cup down, the fragile china breaking much to Discord's and her surprise, but that didn't stop or even slow down the oncoming storm

           "Oh, I see. So you're the victim of all of this now. You're the one who's caught in a riptide of emotions, literally talking to their self. You're the one who's in severe pain and traumatized, even depressed to what could be the point of no return. You're the one who can't stand to look at somepony they thought was a loyal friend, and then feel guilty about it. You're the one who needs all of my support, and not horsecrap from an attention-seeking whorse like me."

          She didn't know where the words came from but they flew from her mouth faster than Rainbow Dash could ever hope to fly. You could even say they practically leaked from her mouth, dripping with anger and annoyance at the draconequus they targeted.

          And that was when all Tartarus was let loose. She saw that Discord was beginning to wish he'd never brought the subject up, but when her kindness towards something disappeared it disappeared.

          "So just because I feel slightly offended means that I'm seeking attention? It mea-"

           Fluttershy cut him off with a curt snort before speaking. "Please, Discord, you could be talking about the most serious thing in the world and I'd know straight up you were trying to seek attention."

          "Oh yeah, well what if I wasn't?"

          "Well then, let's see. The last time you did talked about something the least bit serious, you were dressed up as a pink alicorn princess with confetti all over you. And judging by that, my if you were talking about something serious you'd be trying to get under me and my friends' skin, you..."

           Fluttershy then took a deep breath. Any restraint she had left vanished.

           "...you BASTARD, YOU!"

           "Yes, the swears words are totally needed. And aren't you the element of KINDNESS, dear Fluttershy? Does that all just fly away when I bring up my feelings?"

            "Oh, you can go-"

             "Go what? Please, dear 'sweet' Fluttershy, tell me what I can go do."

             One minute went by another, and both of them were standing up, yelling at the top of their voices. She wasn't even speaking coherent sentences as far as she could tell.

             Yet as Fluttershy spat out hateful words like a losing gambler, Discord seemed to daze off for a minute as his eyes lost contact with hers, drifting up to the ceiling. He still retorted to her snarky and frankly quite rude comments, but his attention looked to be elsewhere.

            But suddenly, as Discord seemingly returned to reality, something shattered with a loud clang, making the pair fall silent. She didn't know if he did it, or if even she did, but one of the teacups broke into tiny pieces as it struck the ground. And with the quiet that had followed, both of them realized just how serious their argument had gotten.

          Of course they had disagreements before, but this was simply too out of the ordinary for them. Out of the ordinary for any pair of friends.

         Hushed and confused, they both walked over to the couch, spending the rest of the day silently sitting on either side, lost in their minds with confused, even sorrowful, thoughts.

  It all replayed within her head, finishing off with her bawling like mad into her pillow, ignoring the fact that Discord even existed by then.

        And Discord heard each of her muffled cries of pain and loud sobs as he sat besides her, it all feeling like... well, Tartarus to him as he was constantly reminded that he had hurt Fluttershy.

        He had hurt his friend.

        Yet with this happening, Discord still found himself able to daze off like he had in the argument, remembering the memory he had been thinking about during that time. The memory that had marked the beginning of what he truly thought was the end of his and Fluttershy’s friendship.

        Discord huffed from boredom as he floated down on one of the many halls of Twilight's castle. He wondered why he ever decided to stay here when Canterlot had had so many ponies to mess with. Seeing the only thing to do was to admire the craftsmanship put into the palace around him, he stopped and took a moment to look around.

        Glistening, polished purple crystal made up the walls, floors, and pillars around him. Giant stained glass windows, showing quite detailed pictures of all the friendship lessons Twilight and her friends had learned were displayed on one side. Their cutiemarks displayed on the other. Everything was also cleaned to perfection, dust seemingly banished from the entire palace, if that was possible. And as Discord observed all of this, he did so on a giant swan made of pink bubbles called, not surprisingly, Pink Bubbles.

        He also whistled a melancholic tune, and the swan, as if on cue, exploded in a shower of sparks. It then proceeded to transform into little pink butterflies that fluttered around him. Butterflies that looked an awful lot like the ones on Fluttershy's flanks...

        Not that he looked there on purpose, of course. Things simply happened.

        He grabbed three of the insects mid flight, watching as they tried to free themselves with frantic flaps of their bubbly wings.

        "Insert sigh of sadness."

        Discord then sighed sadly.

        "Oh my dear Fluttershy, I've been a self centered jerk, haven't I?" he murmured just before he delved deep into his world of thoughts, eventually letting the three butterflies fly away to join the rest of their kaleidoscope just before they disappeared in a flash of pink.

         Discord could still feel her embrace imprinted on his skin like molten iron. That embrace that was forgiving him even though he didn't deserve it one bit after all he'd done to her.

        At this thought, drips of the fiery substance he had used to describe Fluttershy's embrace begin collecting in his palm. A result of his subconsciousness: Jerry, as he had named him. Using his chaotic magic, Jerry then summoned a ball of frost with a small click of Discord's talons, freezing the ever-morphing ball into a solid sphere. He proceeded to round the rough edges, and threw it up into the air where it turned into one of his eyes. It then landed in Discord's right eye socket, which had been empty just because of Jerry's boredom.

        With Jerry's mini chaos spree over and thoughts rolling around Discord's head as if it were a drying machine, he skipped down the halls, finding an egress and quickly speeding through it using flight. His wings then transformed, growing into large pony wings the size of an alicorn's as he flapped over to a hill that he often liked to think on, nicknamed the Thinking Hill.  Discord then watched Celestia raise the sun, like he did every morning...

Aha! Celestia! he thought, a huge, toothy grin plastered on his face upon thinking the marvelous thought. She would help him deal with this. After all, he had given her flowers. She totally owed him one...

        He sent a mental message to her, which zipped right to her brain by the force of his magic, and delved into her mind, making a speedy connection between them.

Who is it? Celestia asked seconds after the summons had been sent.

None other than Discord, your go-to god for all things chaotic!

Well then, why are you taking up some precious time of mine, Discord?

Well, you see, Fluttershy and I's relationship is getting a little rocky…

Hmm, I see. It's not very shocking after recent events.

Yes yes, you must taunt me with my past mistakes. Don’t you know I’m REFORMED now, Celly?

          Discord could practically feel Celestia rolling her eyes.

Anyways, I think you're less of a victim here in this 'relationship'.

Whatever do you mean?

Discord, she wants you to go to Canterlot for a few months.

What? I mean, I know I… hurt Fluttershy, and that she’s the pony who’s been in pain more than any of her friends during these past few days, but this sounds a bit, well, extreme for her standards.

Discord, I think what you did to her really hurt more than you think it did. Here, I can even send the letter to you.

        A white flash of light then appeared in front of him, the rolled up letter dropping to the grass covered ground just in front of him.

Okaaay, so how exactly does this help me?

Just read it, and look at what she says. This could help you understand exactly what she's going through. And maybe, if I remember correctly, even help you know how to heal your friendship.

Mkay, bye bye Sunbutt!

Wait, you took a shower here a few days before! Where did you put that mane flow shampoo-

        Discord cut her off, raising the letter to where he could read it, glasses appearing in front of his eyes.

        And that's when all of his problems got ten times worse.

        Literally. He did the math.