The author cleared his throat. “This is a story about a powerful but evil wizard, who plans–”

Rainbow Dash interrupted. "So you're writing a story, huh? Don't tell me - let me guess. Some badpony is up to no good, and wants to get his hooves on some magical MacGuffin. After some thrilling fight scenes and a bunch of danger, we will save the day without any casualties. Oh - and I'm going to be totally awesome. Have I got it?"

The author sighed. "Are you saying you don't want to save the day?"

"No, I still want to look awesome. But mix it up a little, ok? For example, kill me off five or six times. But then bring me back, because I'm just too awesome to stay dead."

"My readers are going to lynch me," the author muttered.

"And have Carrot Top save the day. She's been kind of neglected lately. Oh - and at the end of the story, turn the villain into a pile of ashes. A very polite and reformed pile of ashes, but still, y'know, ashes. That talk."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? I really don't have a good feeling about this..."

"Oh, you can trust me! It'll be twenty percent cooler!"

"If you say so," the author said reluctantly.