The Fruit Thief

by HapHazred

Rating: everyone
Tags: Adventure, Pinkie Pie, Big Macintosh, Granny Smith, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Romance
Length: 4949

Applejack is going on a delivery to Fillydelphia that'll take her two days to complete... longer if a mysterious pony dressed in black finds a way to stop her in transit.

Applejack, despite having worked hard all week during the Autumn Harvest, is going on a two day delivery trip to Fillydelphia, leaving behind her family and her sleepy marefriend, Rainbow Dash. Just before leaving, however, she recieves dark tidings of a mysterious criminal bent on fruit larceny...

Of course, the trip won't go as planned.

Contains Appledash and cartoon villainy. Beware.

Published 2014-12-23 02:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-12-23 02:40:01 UTC

The Fruit Thief

Applejack's eyes snapped open. She glanced over towards her alarm clock. Quick as a flash, her hoof interposed itself between the hammer and bell, silencing it prematurely. She sighed and edged away from the warm body to her left and into the cold outside her bed, getting to her hooves as delicately as she could. She kicked her hat, which was resting on one of the posts of her bed, sending it flying in a perfect arc towards her head. It settled onto her mane comfortably, and only then did she allowed herself to yawn, once.

It was as quiet a yawn as she could afford, but it was enough to get her from sleepy to awake in an instant. She glanced at the tiny tuft of rainbow colored mane poking out between the sheets. Applejack tiptoed to the curtains, making sure not to wake the sleeping mare up, and gently parted them, letting the pre-dawn light illuminate her room. The sheets around the pegasus tightened, blocking out the invasive light. Applejack made her way to the door, and left.

She considered gently waking her up, but thought better of it. If she was going to have to get Rainbow Dash awake before she left, she'd like to give her as much time as she could.

Once she was outside, she breathed out, relaxing at last. Another pony was already in the corridor, as awake as she was, even if he didn't act like he was. Big Macintosh always looked just a little sleepy, after all.

“Mornin',” Applejack grunted to her brother. Big Macintosh nodded, and trotted downstairs. Applejack instead headed for the bathroom, beginning their morning ritual just as they did at the start of any day.

She took a hairband from the side of the sink and wrapped it around her long, golden mane, tying it back into a utilitarian ponytail. Then she brushed her teeth, and combed her morning mane out of her eyes.

The sounds of cooking could be heard as Big Macintosh started making breakfast, right on schedule. The farmpony spat out the minty contents of her mouth and trotted down towards the noise.

“Bathroom's free. I'll take over,” she declared.

The kitchen still hadn't warmed up properly, and Applejack shivered a little. She looked at her breakfast. As expected, it was apples. It was always apples.

The next pony to enter the kitchen was Granny Smith. Like Applejack and Big Macintosh, she was an early riser. They had to be: apple trees didn't wait for nopony.

“Mornin', Granny. Fancy some apples?”

“That'd be fine, sugar. What've you got planned for today?” her Granny replied, sitting down slowly onto one of the kitchen chairs, almost as rickety as the old mare herself. Applejack looked back at the apples she was frying.

“Well, there's the delivery to Fillydelphia that has to be done,” Applejack said, slowly. “So I was going to get that done today, before the season's up.”

Granny Smith nodded, her expression dark. “I expected as much. Y'know, you've been workin' a whole lot this harvest. You ever thought about taking some time off to spend with your friends?”

Applejack looked at Granny Smith as if she was crazy. It was true she had been working hard all week... she always did. Autumn Harvest was one of the busiest times of the year, right after Applebucking Season. They had to get apples picked for winter, and delivered to as many towns as they could, or else nopony would have nothing to eat during the cold months of snow.

“Well, if I don't handle it, who'll do the delivery instead?”

“Big Macintosh can do it.”

The large stallion poked his head back through the door, as if mentioning his name was enough to summon him. “Eeyup.”

Applejack shook her head. “We all know that I ain't lettin' such a large shipment be handled by anypony other'n me. It's not like some pie delivery to a backwards village down south: ponies'll be dependin' on these apples.”

Big Macintosh looked at Granny Smith. The older mare looked back at him. Both ponies sighed. Applejack grinned: she had won the argument, and she'd handle the trip, whether they had their reservations or not. As far as Applejack was concerned, the delivery was her responsibility, and she won this argument every single year.

“Whatever you say, sugar'. I'll go get the paper: it should have arrived by now,” Granny said, reluctantly getting to her hooves. “You might want to say goodbye to your marefriend, it bein' a two day trip an' all.”

Applejack peered into the contents of her frying pan, suddenly gloomy. Just thinking about Rainbow staying at the farm was enough to make her reconsider. The pegasus was tough, sure, but that didn't mean she wouldn't complain about her leaving for two days on such short notice. Applejack had been avoiding telling her about the trip for that very reason.

“Yup, I'll do that,” she said absently. “Big Mac, can you get three plates out while I head on upstairs?”

Big Macintosh widened his eyes a little. “Um... won't she still be sleepin'?”

“Yes, but I'll be leavin' as soon as possible, to get the most daylight I can. She'll just fall back asleep anyhow, you'll see.”

She handed the frying pan over to her brother, making sure not to burn either one of them, and then trotted back upstairs, Big Macintosh's eyes following her as she went.

Her routine of letting her marefriend sleep through her early mornings made creeping back inside the room feel rather unnatural to her. Applejack tiptoed towards her side of the bed and knelt down, trying to figure out how best to get through the cocoon of sheets Rainbow had built around her, protecting her from the autumn morning cold.

Sweet Celestia, she looked adorable like that.

“Hey? RD?” Applejack whispered. There was no reply. Applejack began raising her voice, just a little bit. “Consarnit'! Just wake up for a second, will you?”

“Mmff.”

“That'll be a yes, will it?”

“Mmff.”

“Listen, I have to go on a delivery for two days, so... I was just going to say goodbye,” Applejack explained, waiting for the inevitable explosion of questions and complaints. It didn't come.

“I know.”

Applejack spluttered. “What?”

“Oh... sorry. I meant 'mmff'.”

“How'd you know I'd be leaving?”

“Granny warned me you might do this. You do this every harvest, apparently.”

Applejack glared at the door, as if somehow the door would communicate her displeasure to her Granny telepathically. “I don't always go on deliveries... just for the Autumn Harvest, usually,” she retorted defensively.

“I meant work too hard,” the bundle of sheets replied sharply. Rainbow Dash was not the most sensitive of ponies, especially before nine. Applejack sighed.

“The farm comes first, Rainbow. Ponies depend on us.”

“Mhm... ponies depend on me too, but I share my workload now and then,” Rainbow replied. “S'cool, though. I had things planned anyhow.”

Applejack raised her eyebrow, smirking. “You had plans?”

“Yeah.”

“You never have plans.”

“Shuddup'. I do lots of things that involve plans.”

Applejack chuckled to herself, then leaned in towards the mane sticking out of the sheets, and kissed it tenderly. “I'll see you the day after tomorrow, 'kay?”

“Mhmf.”

Applejack got back to her hooves, and left Rainbow alone to go back to sleep. The pegasi's words followed her as she made her way back to the kitchen, and by extension, breakfast.

“I know I work hard, but it's only because I have to...” she muttered to herself. Big Macintosh turned his head towards her.

“What was that?” he asked.

“Nothin'.”

“All hooves on deck!” exclaimed Granny Smith as she exploded with painstaking deliberation into the kitchen.

Applejack and Big Macintosh both looked over at her, alarmed. She was waving a newspaper around angrily. “We got ourselves a problem!”

The paper slapped against the table, and both ponies leaned in to see what it was about.

“This is the school paper,” Applejack pointed out, a little confused. Where was the Daily Neighbour, Granny's usual paper?

“Yup, but look at the headlines!”

Applejack obliged. “Fruit thief strikes again... Carrot Tops crop crippled?”

“There's a mischievous lout around ruinin' us farmers livelihoods,” Granny explained angrily. “She's a devious criminal!”

Big Macintosh nodded. “A master trickster.”

“A dangerous kingpin of crime!”

Applejack looked at both of them, jaw dropping. “Since when have you two been scared of one lousy fruit thief? She's just one pony...” she said, looking back at the article. “In fact, nopony knows if it even is a she at all.”

“She made the papers!” Granny replied. “That means she's ruthless!”

“I'd be careful' on the road, sis', if I were you. Never know if trouble might strike you away from Ponyville.”

Applejack laughed. “If this fruity larcenist tries any funny stuff, he'll be dealin' with my hooves in his face. I ain't afraid of no thief.”

Granny gave Applejack a funny look, then snatched the paper away with a bird-like movement. “Suit yourself, sugar'.”

Applejack frowned. First, Rainbow was acting more understanding than expected about her leaving for two days, and now this newspaper mischief... it was a strange morning. Applejack decided to get outside and clear her head whilst things still seemed almost normal. She grabbed a fried apple in between her teeth and trotted away.

“Mmh... Ill' see y'later!” she exclaimed from behind the apple. “Gotta get the cart loaded!”

Both Big Macintosh and Granny Smith watched her leave with what was somewhere between a smirk and a frown on their faces.

Applejack didn't take long to get the cart ready: she had planned for this yesterday, after all. All the crates and barrels where just where she had left them, and the wheels of the once rickety wooden vehicle had been oiled and tended to. What had been an old and decrepit transport was now a strong, powerful machine.

Applejack glanced back at the house, and more specifically, her bedroom window. Somewhere inside was a pegasus, no doubt sleeping like a log.

“Bye, sugarcube,” Applejack muttered to the window, and strapped herself to the cart and began her trip. She doubted that Rainbow properly understood why she took work so seriously. Rainbow herself was usually such a carefree pony... always napping, or playing, or being irresponsible. For Applejack, Rainbow was that one thing that allowed her to relax in a world of long hours and busy schedules. Rainbow Dash was special, and although Applejack was sure that she'd survive a few days without her, she couldn't imagine she'd enjoy it. By extension, Applejack wouldn't enjoy it as much either.

The sun had risen, and just in time, too. Applejack liked seeing the road ahead of her, especially with such a large cargo at stake. Not to mention, the position of the sun helped her orient herself. She needed to head east, between the mountain ranges towards the sea. It'd be a long journey, especially with such a heavy cart slowing her down.

Applejack began humming to herself as she walked, keeping her mind as alert as she could, carefully selecting each note. Now and then, she'd punctuate her humming with a sharp whistle.

“Ouchies!” came a voice from on top of the cart. Applejack widened her eyes and ground to a halt.

“Who's there!”

“Oh, it's just me. I cut myself,” came a disturbingly familiar, bubbly, and decidedly pink voice. Applejack gaped as Pinkie Pie jumped off the cart and bounced next to her. “You should be careful where you whistle!”

“I... uh, sorry, Pinkie, I guess. What're you doin' here?” she asked, astounded at her friend's presence, looking at the sun. It must be around ten in the morning. Applejack shook her head. Time flew by when you were travelling alone. “We must be miles away from Ponyville! How'd you get in my cart?”

“It all started ten years ago, whilst the world was still young...”

“Nevermind, then. I don't like stories with a slow burn.”

Pinkie zipped her lips shut with a giggle and hopped back onto the cart. “Wowee! That's a lot of apples. A wows-a-lot of apples. Where are you going with them?”

“Fillydelphia. It's an important shipment, see?”

“That a lo-o-ong way. Why didn't you get somepony to come with you?”

“Because it'll take two days, and nopony'll want to go on a delivery trip for two whole days.”

Pinkie gasped. “Not even Rainbow?”

Applejack snorted. As if the excitable pegasus would enjoy going so slowly on a trip that could take her, at most, an hours worth of flying. “Especially Rainbow.”

“But what if something happens on the way! Then you'll be in a doodles worth of trouble.”

Applejack snickered. “You're referrin' to the fruit thief, right?”

“Ponies steal fruit?!”

“You haven't heard about the fruit thief?”

“I haven't heard about the fruit thief.”

Applejack shrugged. “She's probably no big deal. Carrot Top has terrible security anyhow. She's gone around... doin' fruit related crimes, or so the papers say.”

“I don't read the papers! I always get told these kinds of things by other ponies.”

“Well, won't you end up like you are now, and not knowing something relevant?”

“Nope, because you just told me!”

Applejack sighed. She had really walked into that one...

“Aren't you scared of this evil meanie apple stealer?”

Applejack shook her head. “Nope. If you haven't heard of him before now, he can't be such a big deal, right? It means nopony's been talkin' 'bout him.”

“First you're not worried because he was in the papers, and now you're not worried because nopony's heard of him? You're going around in circles!”

“Nope, I'm standin' still.”

Pinkie hesitated for a second, then narrowed her eyes approvingly. “Well played, Applejack.”

Applejack grinned. Several years worth of Pinkie experience had taught her how to deal with the mare's confusing logic. She tugged on her cart and kept on moving.

“Well, if you want to head back to Ponyville, it's in the opposite direction,” Applejack told her friend. Pinkie nodded.

“Okie dokie! Oh, wait!”

Applejack stopped again, groaning, and looked back at Pinkie. The excitable mare was shaking uncontrollably. “Pinkie sense! Beware! Beware!”

Applejack sighed. “What is it now?”

Then all she heard was the sound of metal upon metal. Applejack's eyes snapped to the source of the sound: her cart's harness, strapped around her shoulders, had come apart. It fell off her and hit the ground with a dull thud. Applejack's muscles tensed up in surprise.

That wasn't supposed to happen.

“What in tarnation'!?”

“Ooh! Pinkie sens—“

Applejack stomped her hoof at Pinkie. “Quiet! I'm tryin' to listen here!”

Somepony... or something... had broken her harness, and without her even seeing what had happened, to boot. Whatever it had been was very fast. Applejack swallowed. Could this be...

“Behold, and tremble! It is I, the dreaded fruit thief!” came a deep, throaty voice. Applejack looked over at a tree, and her jaw dropped. Not out of fear, but simply out of sheer surprise.

A black clad pony was leaning as casually as she could on the trunk, her entire body covered in pitch black material, obscuring her face, body, and mane. Adding to this disguise, she wore a monocle, and a ridiculously tall top hat.

“You've got to be kiddin'...”

“Ooh! She's just like Mare-do-Well... except evil!” Pinkie supplied. Applejack rolled her eyes.

“Thanks for the input, sugar'.”

“I like her hat,” Pinkie added. Applejacks frown deepened.

“Thank you, Pinkie.”

“It has to be the most stylish hat ever!”

“Thank you, Pinkie!” Applejack grumbled, adjusting her own stetson grumpily. So what if top hats were in this season? Stetsons were forever.

“I'm here for your apples, Apples,” the thief told her, menacingly. Or at least, it would have been if her top hat hadn't tilted to the side as she talked. Applejack chuckled.

“I guessed that already, but it ain't happenin'.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yup. I happen to be an Apple, and an Apple don't give up just 'cause some creep in a costume tells us to.”

The thief stopped leaning on the tree, and took two steps towards Applejack, and her cart. There was a good dozen yards between them, but Applejack figured that this thief was pretty quick. She remembered what had happened to the harness: it had been cut through without her even noticing. Something about this mare was special... but Applejack wasn't exactly slow herself, and now she was expecting her.

“I can't say I was expecting you to bring a friend... but I guess I can adapt. Mwa ha ha!”

Pinkie Pie gasped. “That was such an evil laugh!”

“Thank you, Pinkie,” Applejack grunted, turning her attention away from the Fruit Thief. The distraction was just enough for the black clad pony to surge forwards, past Applejack and shoving her shoulder into the cart, which began to roll backwards alarmingly. Applejack panicked.

“My apples!”

“Mwa ha ha.”

“It ain't funny!” Applejack snapped.

“Sorry... oh wait, I forgot, I'm evil. I don't care!”

Applejack growled. “Oh, you're gonna get it!” she shouted, and leaped towards the thief. Pinkie bounced off towards the cart.

“Don't worry! I'll catch it!”

The thief dodged every one of Applejack's punches, backing away as she did so, laughing in as insulting and decidedly villainous manner as she could. Once she put enough distance between her and Applejack, she turned and ran.

“Catch me if you can!”

Applejack snarled, but paused to think. Pinkie would get the cart... she could therefore chase after this criminal as much as she wanted. Grinning viciously, she charged off after her opponent.

“You ain't getting' away with this! This is for Carrot Tops crop!”

The black clad thief darted in between trees, dashing uphill. Her heavy outfit was slowing her down, Applejack could tell. She was already panting, and it looked like she'd be sweating like a pig in there. One of the lower branches knocked off her top hat, and it fell next to Applejack as she gave chase.

“No! Not the hat!” the thief exclaimed, distraught. Applejack's own hat stayed fixed on top of her head, loyal to it's owner.

“Feel free to stop and pick it up!” Applejack retorted, trying to goad the thief into slowing down.

“N-no thanks. I'll just keep running.”

The hill was becoming increasingly steep, and the road was out of sight. Applejack tried memorizing which route they took, but it was a losing battle.

“You can't get away! Nopony can outrun me on the ground!” Applejack snapped.

“You take that back!”

“No!”

“I can run faster than anypony! I'm... the villainous fruit thief!”

“Prove it, you darn poser!”

The fruit thief did her best, and ran even faster. Applejack had to admit, she was having a hard time keeping up. This thief was no slouch.

The slope evened out slowly, and Applejack realized that they must be reaching the top of the valley. The trees were becoming more sparse as they gained altitude. Eventually, they reached a grassy meadow, and the view caused Applejack to slow to a stop.

There was a cliff nearby: sharp and rocky. But what lay just over the edge of that cliff was even more impressive: floating rocks, supported by clouds, with tall, foamy waterfalls spewing vapor through the midday sunlight, breaking the light up into all the colors of the rainbow, creating a kaleidoscope of reds, blues and greens that looked almost magical. The fruit thief backed up against the edge of the cliff, panting. It didn't seem she could run any farther.

“Okay... it's just the... outfit. It's really heavy...” she groaned, trying to straighten up to her full height. “But now, I have you just where I want you.”

Applejack grinned, turning her attention back to the thief. “That so?”

“Yeah, it is so,” she replied, and then let herself fall over the edge of the cliff.

Applejack widened her eyes. “What the—...”

She trotted over to the edge, trying to make out the shape of the dark pony who had thrown herself off to her doom. She shook her head, amazed. “She must be as nutty as a Manehattan Cinnamon Swirl...”

Applejack heard the sound of wings, and threw herself backwards just in time before the fruit thief soared back up to her level. She had torn the sides off her black outfit, revealing two strong, powerful wings.

Blue wings.

Applejack's jaw dropped. Then she narrowed her eyes.

“Oh, sweet Celestia, you are in so much trouble...”

The fruit thief began removing her mask, chuckling. “What, you thought you were the only one allowed to dress up and make black look good?” she asked, tossing the fabric, and the monocle, aside. Rainbow Dash grinned mischievously. “And the best actress award goes to...”

Applejack went through all she had noticed about the fruit thief in her mind, and everything added up. She was good at running, knew that she'd be heading to Fillydelphia, and prone to overacting? Applejack was kicking herself that she hadn't recognized the signs. She hadn't expected this of Rainbow. Or anypony, for that matter.

“You get down here right now so's I can smack you round the ear!”

“Hold your horses, AJ. I had good reasons!”

“Well, go on, lets hear 'em!”

Rainbow held up her hooves, and became as serious as she could manage.

“You work... way too hard.”

“So you decided to—...”

“Whoa! Let me finish!”

Applejack tapped her hoof expectantly. Rainbow stroked her chin thoughtfully, then sighed.

“Okay, I was actually done.”

“How does ruinin' my delivery make me have to work any less hard?” Applejack demanded.

Rainbow grinned. “I didn't ruin anything. What is a criminal mastermind without her loyal henchponies?”

Applejack groaned. “Pinkie?”

“Uh, no, I have no idea what she was doing there. Actually, I got Big Macintosh for this one.”

Applejack almost exploded. “My brother was in on this? He's gonna' get it when I find him!”

“Uh... please don't. See, this isn't a prank. We expected you'd insist on doing the delivery, so we came up with a plan. After a long evening of deliberation, me and the rest of ou— your family decided we'd get you away from the cart and up here, where you can relax.”

“Wh—... How did you come to this conclusion?!”

“Cider may have been involved, but then I stole the costume from Spike, so we were more or less committed by that point. See, whilst you were chasing me, Big Macintosh has got to the cart and is doing the delivery himself, instead of you.”

Applejack felt her heart-rate slow as she calmed down. So all this was just to give her a day off? It was crazy, insane... but then again, would anything else have worked?

“Are you less mad than before?” Rainbow asked, hopefully.

Applejack's shoulders went slack. “I guess.”

“Cool! Also, I picked this spot myself. Pretty neat, huh?” she said, gesturing at the mountainside.

Applejack gazed at the floating rocks admiringly. Rainbow had good taste in scenery, at least.

“It is. What is it?”

“No idea, but I saw it a month ago whilst I was flying. Equestria's a crazy place, huh?”

Applejack grinned. “I have another question: this fruit thief. How'd you get in the paper? Did you really raid Carrot's crop?”

“Oh, I didn't. We just got Applebloom to get the school paper to make a one-off first page.”

The farmpony shook her head, impressed. So Applebloom was involved too? She imagined that Granny Smith had a hoof in this as well: her whole family would have collaborated on this crazy plot. She had to admit, she still felt sore about not being able to make the delivery... but looking at Rainbow, floating in front of flying rocks and wispy waterfalls, and thinking of her family, who went to all this trouble just for her, she couldn't help but feel a little grateful.

“That's the most ridiculous plan I ever heard.”

Rainbow shrugged. “It worked, didn't it?”

“I know, and it's the sweetest thing you've done for me. I suppose I have been workin' myself a bit hard...”

“Granny kept on saying you did it every year. Applebucking season, the rodeo, Autumn Harvest... you always try to do everything yourself,” Rainbow told her. “No longer! The fun police is here to stay.”

“Fun police?”

“Yeah. I've got a badge and everything.”

Applejack laughed. Rainbow soared over to her and threw off the rest of her outfit. “Come on, I've set up a picnic spot just ahead.”

Applejack looked at the cliff, confused. “Sugarcube... there ain't no 'ahead'.”

Rainbow bared her teeth in the most scary grin of all time, then wrapped her hooves around Applejack. Before the farmpony had time to protest, she was already in the air, and soaring towards one of the floating rocks.

“Whoa!”

The pair landed on the rock gently. Light, sparse grass had been growing on top, and a thick sheet had been placed over that. Snacks and drinks were almost falling out of the wicker basket that Rainbow had brought with her.

“There's always an 'ahead'.”

Applejack peered over the edge. They must be hundreds of feet above ground... she couldn't even see the bottom.

“Ain't you afraid of fallin'?” she asked. Rainbow shook her head.

“Nope, and neither should you. There are loads of clouds down there to cushion your fall. I gave it a shot a week ago: it's really fun.”

Applejack shook her head in disbelief. “Can't believe you tried that.”

“Well, I have wings, so I figured if there was going to be a problem I could always just... you know, fly.”

“True enough.”

Applejack sat down, and looked over at the pegasus, already making herself comfortable. The altitude didn't seem to make her nervous... why should it? She was born to live at high altitudes. Applejack let herself relax too... after all, if Rainbow said that there would be clouds, she believed her.

“Listen, I know I work hard, but that's just cause' I want to provide for my family, and everypony else besides. I do have my reasons.”

Rainbow rolled over next to Applejack, wrapping her wing around her waist. “Yeah, I know, but see, all I want is for you to be happy, so there are times when I'm going to stop you from working.”

Applejack smiled. “What if workin' is what makes me happy?” she asked. Rainbow stuck her tongue out at her.

“Now you're being feshtee—... facti—...facetious. Big Macintosh has been meaning to put his hoof down about this delivery business for a while,” Rainbow explained, serious. “Working isn't what makes you happy, it's being there for your family. 'Course, your family feels the same way, and they don't like you doing all the heavy lifting.”

Applejack nuzzled Rainbow, chuckling. Rainbow had a point. “Thank Celestia for the fun police, then,” she said.

“Yup. Just a regular days work for officer Dash.”

“Although watchin' my cart roll away weren't exactly fun, you know.”

“Pfft. Can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. Or a dozen.”

Applejack shook her head, and Rainbow closed her eyes. “Next time I'll just tell you to lay off the chores. Now excuse me, somepony woke me up at six in the morning because she's a workaholic, and I need some sleep. There are snacks in... in the basket.”

Applejack didn't have time to reply before Rainbow fell asleep, snoring loudly.

“G'night, sugarcube,” Applejack whispered. “Thanks for everything.”

Big Macintosh plodded onwards, wishing to Celestia that he could find something to stick in his ears.

The cart was easy. Compared to some of the things he'd pulled and pushed around, it was pretty simple to drag across the road.

The distance wasn't hard either. Although Applejack liked to think she was the toughest pony around, Big Macintosh could pretty much walk as fast and far as she could.

What was killing him was Pinkie Pies incessant babbling. Rainbow Dash hadn't said anything about her being around.

He sighed. This was going to be a long trip.

“You're gonna' get it, Rainbow Dash...” he grumbled.

Author's Note

This is a story that I had fun writing for several reasons: the first was that I managed to write in Pinkie Pie. That pony... is not easy to write, and for once, I wanted to include her just a little instead of avoiding her like the plague. I can't actually remember the last time I even gave her dialogue. The second, and more important reason, is that it's about Rainbow Dash helping Applejack have some fun. Via the medium of capes and monocles. What else would have made sense?

The Apple family are supposed to be 'together forever' but often Applejack is both in charge, actively seeks to be in charge, and does the most apparent work. Rainbow Dash is, by contrast, far more fun-loving. It makes sense that these two aspects get balanced out, especially if they get shipped, and I'd see it play out something like this. I took a few cues from Applebuck Season and Mysterious Mare-Do-Well regarding Applejack's work and the obvious costume idea, but Applebuck Season was more about Applejack's inability to ask for help for something she needed, as opposed to letting other ponies help her do something she can achieve, and letting herself unwind a bit.

Fun fact: the act of stealing apples is called 'scrumping'.

In any case, I hoped you enjoyed this little slice of silly. Please comment, and give as much advice as you can. I read all my comments, and enjoy getting them.