Of Dreams and Dictators

by Redcoat

Rating: everyone
Tags:
Length: 1060

After making a foolish wager, the Sun and Moon trade places in the sky.

Aside from the metaphorical nonsense written above, this is a story about your place in life, and that if you ever deviate from it you might very well end the world.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-25 03:10:09 UTC

Upon which a wager is reached

Princess Celestia walked in a huff. The nerve of some ponies, insinuating that she had an easy job. Who in their right minds could think dealing with nobles and politicians and opportunists was easy? She walked down the hall, a thundercloud over her head. The maids hated when she did that, but she felt that now was a very appropriate time to be wearing thunderclouds.

Honestly. Easy? Organizing dinners nopony really wanted to attend, easy? Dealing with the ponies that did want to come? Sympathizing with the foals they toted around, displaying them like prize trophies? Settling disputes over stupid things, settling disputes over not-stupid things, none of that was easy!

She reached her room and with a flash of light was inside. She jumped onto her bed and continued her mental rant. If anything was easy it was you-know-who's job! Fighting nightmares? Soothing dreams? Celestia would have given her left hooves to spend the night psychoanalyzing her subjects!

She kicked off her shoes and threw them into a pile next to her necklace and tiara. Yes, it would be her dream come true to only have to psychoanalyze, well, anypony really. But instead it seemed that the whole world was psychoanalyzing her! From what time she got up to how she liked her tea, everypony took everything she did like it was an act of god! You-know-who could never realize how nerve-wracking it is to know that if accidentally made a face at a tart she didn't like, that the pony who baked it would probably be ostracized from society and disowned by his family and driven to suicide!

No. the fact stood that running a country was no easy task.

Princess Luna strode in a way that many associated with irritated gryphons. She had many things on her mind, most of which pertains to the above written. Some of which pertained to the price of tea in Chineigh, but still mostly her sister.

In a previously insinuated argument Luna had walked into the dinning chamber exhausted. She had spent the previous five hours defeating and imprisoning a particularly nasty nightmare, and the battle had left her mind heavy with doubts. It wasn't that the battle had been especially traumatic, that was just the sort of nightmare she had been fighting.

Celestia also entered the room in a like sense of mind and body. Except for her, it hadn't been doing battle with a nightmare, but her physician that had left her so down. Granted, he had always been a politically minded physician, but he was also an honest one. She knew that and favored him for it. That is why what he had said took such a toll on her mood.

They both sat down at a rather small table, only large enough to seat the two of them. Which I suppose isn't all that small in actuality, but in comparison only. A flock of servant girls quickly set steaming hot cups of coffee and tea in front of them, respectively. They both sat, drinking their elixirs and making polite small talk. Neither felt very comfortable speaking about that which bothered them.

It was Luna who first broke that trend, expressing her distaste in nightmares. Celestia replied with a remark about how nightmares weren't really problematic. And while she might have meant something else, Luna took this as a sign that Celestia thought her work wasn't important.

Luna declared that nightmares were a very serious problem, and that if anything it was having tea parties with ponies who didn't deserve them that was stupid. Celestia, quite shocked at the turn in conversation, questioned why Luna felt that way. Luna replied that simply telling ponies what to do was easy and that her breath smelled of boogers. Celestia scowled.

She them explained how solving mind puzzles was a lot easier when done from the inside than from the outside. Luna replied that Celestia had farts for brains. Celestia dismissed the insult, as she knew that Luna hadn't had a cause to use any since they were very very young. The had both argued thusly, the one making a serious and logical argument and the other retorting with childish insults, until one of the servant girls meekly suggested a wager.

A wager that went like this, the two regents would switch jobs for a week, and whoever did the others' job best was correct. Celestia thought this was a very rash and unwise wager. Luna thought it was perfect. She declared that running the country for a week would be child's play. Celestia scowled and explained that while it might be fun to play psychiatrist for week, she couldn't the country to be run solely by one as inexperienced in it's workings as her sister.

Luna said that running the country would be easy, but that Celestia didn't want to enter her subjects dreams because she was afraid of their nightmares. She then began to strut around and cluck like a chicken. Celestia's face turned red. She screeched that running a country wasn't a game. Luna head butted the table three times in quick succession before fluffing her wings and clucking as she had previously done.

In a rage Celestia slammed her hoof onto the table, cracking a surface that had survived several uses as a shield against dragon fire, and screamed: “FINE THAN! THE WAGER IS ON! IF YOU WIN YOU CAN RUN THE ME-DAMNED COUNTRY FOREVER, BUT IF I WIN YOU SHUT THE TARTARUS UP!”

Luna agreed, and the two exited through opposite doors. The maid who had suggested the wager had curled into a corner in the room under the collective glares of her peers. Nopony was alive who remembered the last time the two had wagered, but there were legends. Not very nice legends.

Luna, of course, felt her stomach drop the second she had left the room. She had been having too much fun working her sister into a passion to think about what she was forcing at the time, but then she stepped hoof into the hallway and it all came back to her. She would either have to lose, or rule the country. By herself, presumably. A lose-lose situation if she had ever been in one.

And so she strode, very much irritated with herself.