Celestia was sitting in her throne room one day, thinking of what to do. Luna was loudly snoring aside of her. Eventually it would get annoying, so Celestia would kick her. Luna would stop snoring, but would continue after some 15-20 minutes. After about 160 minutes of lunar snoring and boredom, Celestia let out a loud grunt and got up. As always, she fell over her first step, then down the rest of the staircase with loud crashes. Celestia groaned. The snoring had stopped, maybe Luna was going to help her. Then the snoring started again.
Celestia brought herself to her hooves and walked out of the throne room to a balcony. All of her guards were off duty for Thanksgiving, Celestia made sure to cool down the sun a bit, for the Fall weather. Celestia expected to look out on her Equestria, seeing it covered in inflatable turkeys and leaves, and homemade reefs. She was expecting the smell of pumpkin pie, dressing, and turkeys. When she looked however, she gasped as she saw none of this. instead, she saw candy canes, red ribbons, and light, and red, and green…and…
DECORATED TREES!!!
It was blasphemy against Thanksgiving! Celestia had to stop it. She thought of what to do. She couldn’t scorch them, then she’d look like more of a tyrant than she already was! She couldn’t melt everything, she couldn’t blow it up…her only choice was to go tell everypony that they shouldn’t forget Thanksgiving.
There was one major problem, however. Celestia was lazy. She didn't want to go ALL the way out into Ponyville and tell everypony they were wrong, she had to get somepony else to do it! So she ran to the back room and took out her super-fancy-163-bit-expensive-quill and started writing on her magical paper of magic. She wrote the following:
"Dear Princess Twilight, I know you're a princess now, and no longer my student, but you must remember I'm still in charge. Now, I need you to bring back Thanksgiving! Year-Round Christmas is not acceptable! You must convince everyone to stop Christmas until thanksgiving is over! PS: Invite me to your feast."
Celestia reread the letter multiple times.
"Perfect!" She said, sending the letter to Twilight.
Twilight was sitting in her bed. It was very early in the morning and she had nothing to get up for. She heard a choking sound coming from Spikes bed, and leaned over to investigate. Spike let out a loud belch as a letter appeared from his mouth. 'Huh.' Twilight thought to herself, picking it up. 'Burp letters never get old.' She opened the letter and read it. Since you've already read it, I'm not going to type it again. Twilight gasped and threw down the letter.
"Her? Come to my feast?" She shouted. "NEVER!" She looked outside and noticed all of the Christmas decorations. She narrowed her eyes to all of the ponies singing Christmas carols and such, as if they actually knew what Christmas really was because that's a human holiday. But hey, give me a break it's a one-shot. "Blasphemy..." Twilight said. She busted out of her door and saw a pony decorating a tree.
"Hello Princess!" He said, smiling and waving. This caused a horrible flashback in which Twilight was stunned...
'Just call me if you need somepony to SMILE AND WAVE.'
The ripple effects of the flashback faded as she eventually got out of it.
"Princess?" The stallion said, in a concerned tone. "Are you alright? Your face was doing something weird..."
Twilight then teleported to the stallion and slapped him off of a ladder. "THANKSGIVING!" She shouted, before teleporting away. The stallion held his face as he received a slap in the face from the new princess. Maybe she liked him.
Pfft.
No.
Back at the castle, Luna had just woken up. She walked to Celestia and poked her side. Celestia whirled around to meet Luna, then jumped back in fright with the sudden sight of a big blue blob of princess in her face.
"Luna!" Celest shouted. "You scared me!"
"Sorry Sister!" Luna replied in a sad tone. "But I just woke up!"
"Luna, you just went to sleep..." Celestia pointed out.
"Ya." Luna said in an awkward way. It was like a drunk Equine with a Germane accent. Celestia facehooved and gestured to Ponyville. "What is it sister?" Luna asked.
"Look." Celestia responded, pointing to the Christmas-Spirited Ponyville. "They're putting up Christmas decorations, and it's not even Thanksgiving yet!"
"Sister..." Luna said again.
"Yes?" Celestia replied.
"We don't even celebrate either of those holidays."
Dumbfounded, Celest thought about this, she wasn't sure about what do to. She decided to let the story go on though.
"It doesn't matter!" She shouted. "We celebrate BOTH of them this year! But first, thanksgiving! It reminds everypony about how they're better than humans who force other humans off their land, and it's a great excuse to get fat."
"Alriiitey." Luna said, using that weird drunk Germane thing again. Celestia gave her an odd look.
"That's weird." Celest said. "Nono...Just no. Go to sleep." Luna nodded happily and fell down in that very spot, and started snoring again.
After a few minutes of teleporting and slapping random ponies, some who were decorating, and some who were just sleeping, Twilight started getting a soar throat. She teleported to Applejack’s to get some Cider.
As usual, Applejack was sitting in her calm apple tree field, harvesting apples. At Six Thirty in the morning. She looked up and saw the wild Twilight appearing. It reminded her of the Pokemon days.
“Hey Twilight, I remember when Pokemon games were named after colors and rocks, not letters.” She said. Applejack then noticed Twilights mane looked like horse crap, (laughing at her own thoughts because horse puns) and that she looked tired. “What’s wrong Twilight?” She asked with a concerned look on her face.
“I just need some Apple Cider for my throat. I’ve been slapping ponies and shouting at them for not celebrating thanksgiving.” She said. Her throat was very…”hoarse”.
“Twilight, we don’t even celebrate thanksgiving, or Christmas for that matter.” Applejack said. “But if you like, I can help you.”
“That would be nice.” Twilight said, giving an annoyed smile.
After finally convincing the entirety of Ponyville to celebrate thanksgiving BEFORE Christmas even was thought of, Twilight and Applejack met with Luna and Celestia.
“You have done well, Twilight.” Celestia said. “Now we can all get fat for a good reason.”
“Should somepony write a letter to you to give this story the proper ending?” Twilight asked.
“Why not.” Celest said, pooling a large Table with food on it for a feast. “But for now, let us eat!” All of the ponies started laughing (Like they do at the end of every episode…over everything) and eating.
”Dear Princess Celestia, Today I learned that Thanksgiving is a holiday too, and should be celebrated BEFORE Christmas is even thought of. I also learned that writing a letter to you every day will eventually make me a princess. Good luck and may the force be with you. Your Friend and Loyal Subject, Applejack.
