Pinkie Watches Grass Grow

by I Thought I Was Toast

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Gummy, Random, Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1553

An extisential crisis from growing grass

Inspired by Pinkie Watches Paint Dry by AbsoluteAnonymous (undoubtably much better than this I just wanted to try out something similar)

Pinkie watches grass grow and ponders the universe and all the implications of grass.

Published 2012-04-28 14:54:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-28 14:54:01 UTC

Chapter 1

The grass was growing again.  Not that it ever stopped it just seemed more noticeable today.  Pinkie stared at it wondering what it all meant.  On the surface each blade looked exactly like every other blades.  Anypony just passing by would see a giant swath of green.

Pinkie sat there though.  She didn’t just glance at the ground because it was there.  She saw the ground.  She’d been sitting on her haunches the past two hours just looking at it and wondering.

The grass wasn’t just there.  It was a living breathing thing just like the rest of us.  One blade had a scratch in it from a bug leaping off, and another hosted the eggs of a bug.  Oh!  That one there was missing a small chip where something had nibbled on it.  She hadn’t seen that before.

Each blade of grass was different in some way.  Some blades were short.  Others were tall.  Many were battered and bruised in someway.  Bug bites.  Ponies walking on them.  There were cases were they even strangled each other as they vied to grow too close together.

They were like all of us.  No, they were everypony.  That one had a scratch like Lyrah’s Cutie Mark making small almost musical notes as the wind passed through it.  That one was all droopy like Cranky and his grumpy wrinkles.  And that one over there had all sorts of little critters crawling over it.  It was a veritable caretaker of critters just like Fluttershy.

It was funny really.  The more she looked the more she could place each and everypony she knew.  And they were all still growing.  It didn’t stop when you reached adulthood.  It never stopped.  Just like the blades of grass everyone just kept on growing as new things happened.  But Pinkie already knew that.

What was odd was that anypony could pass by and not see this.  All they saw was a giant mass of green.  What did it mean?  Did it mean that no pony really mattered in the scheme of things?  Did it mean we all just were?  Did it mean there was no point in trying to grow because in the end it didn’t matter?

That was rather sad.  No point to growing, to learning to having fun.  No point to parties.  No point to parties?  What was a world without parties?  If that was true life was nothing more than a sham.  A play of fiction played before the universe as it sat and watched unclapping as the curtain fell.

Surely there was a point to life though?  Just the fact that a smile could make her feel good meant there was something more to it.  And if there was nothing to life in the grand scheme of things then why could she see it?  Why could she see the individual blades.  No, if there was no point to it the blades would remain a mystery.  That made sense… Right?

And what about those blades that struggled against each other?  Strangling each other as they grew together.  Did it mean there was such a thing as being too close?  That you could, without realizing it, choke people by being too nice?  What did that say about her?  Was she too close to ponies?

That was rather terrifying.  What if she was driving them crazy without realizing it?  Sure they said they loved her parties but what if they didn’t?  Oh that was a road she didn’t want to go down again.  As fun as Madame LaFlour had been she was aware of how talking to things reflected on her.  The town had talked for months after that little episode but if she couldn’t have real friends she needed something… Right?  Didn’t ponies have a right to happiness?  Having friends made her happy so she should have friends.  But what if her happiness makes them unhappy?  That just chucks her whole right to friends thing out the window.

Or what if it was just the opposite?  What if those blades strangling each other represented the pain in the world?  Sure every worlds not perfect but what did it say if ponies were too uncaring to pass this wonderful bit of grass by and let it kill itself?  Didn’t the grass matter just as much as everything else in the world?

Grass lived and grew like every other pony.  Maybe it even had dreams too?  There was no was to tell.  It’s not like you could ask it.

“What do you think grass?” Pinkie asked, “Do you have dreams?

“You live just like everypony else.  Can you hear me?”

“Can you sense me?”

“Do you see us as I see you?”

The grass remained silent.  Perhaps it was contemplating its answer?  The blade Pinkie identified as looking like her seemed to have stilled as if in particularly deep thought.

“Do you see us as one giant mass of ponies?”

“Or are we individuals to you?”

The grass remained ever silent.  It did however flutter in the wind rather suggestively.  It was like it was gesturing a hand at her ambiguously and raising an eyebrow inquisitively saying, “I don’t know… Why don’t you tell me?”

“Ponies don’t seem to notice you but I do.” Pinkie said, “They see you as one giant mass of green, but I see each and every one of you.”

………………………………….

“How long has she been like this?” asked Rainbow poking Pinkie and watching her sway back and forth from it until she settled back into her perfectly still pose.  She was muttering nonsense to the grass, aparrently having a conversation again.  Rainbow hoped this wasn’t the birthday fiasco all over again.

“Umm… I don’t know…” murmered Fluttershy, “I was just walking back from the lake to my cottage and found her there.  Is she okay?”

“I don’t know Fluttershy…  This is Pinkie Pie.  She could have tea with Discord and we wouldn’t question it.  This could be just Pinkie being Pinkie.”

“Well… What do we do then?” asked Fluttershy.

“We watch and wait till we know.  Trust me I’ll figure it out faster than most.  Pinkie Pie may be random but I know Pinkie’s style of random.  Just to make sure though go get something for her to eat.  If there’s one way to get to Pinkie it’s with food.  I mean she can eat multi-layer cakes in one bite!  Talk about an athlete of eating.”

………………………………………………..

Pinkie stared at the grass waiting for a response again.

As usual it just waved ambiguously back at her.  So many blades, so many things to say.  Maybe that was it.  They were all answering in their own way and no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t see it all.  One blade said this, one blade said that, the answers were lost in the yells of every other blade.  Was she just as bad as every other pony?  She said she saw them for what they were but did she really?

No matter how hard she tried she couldn’t see all of them at once.  One changed while she watched another.  Time passed even as they answered changing them.  Who was she to think she knew them?  Who was she to think she knew any pony?

…………………………………………….

“Did the cake work?” asked Twilight walking up, “I heard about it from the Cakes when I stopped to get cupcakes for the party later.”

“Nope.  It didn’t.  She won’t even look at it.  We tried wafting it under her nose and everything,” said Rainbow, “Whatever’s got ahold of her isn’t your normal Pinkie randomness.  I mean shes been really random before but this is something else.”

“Well there’s no point in going to the party if the guest of honor isn’t there,” Twilight murmured, “She does know it’s her Birthday again right?”

“I don’t know,” shrugged Rainbow, “I thought that might be it but no matter how much I poke, prod, talk to her she doesn’t respond.  I sent Fluttershy out to get Gummy.  Thought that might do it.  You might want to get the others here.  Maybe throwing the party right here will snap her out of it?”

……………………………………….

Pinkie turned as she felt something gumming her hoof.

“Hey Gummy.  What are you doing here?  Can you tell me what you see here?”

Gummy just continued chewing her hoof.  Bite.  Bite. Chew. Chew.  Same old pattern.

“The grass Gummy!  What do you see in the grass?”

Gummy looked at her as if to say, “Grass?”  He clearly didn’t care.  He was just Gummy.  That’s all he was and he was going to continue being Gummy.  It didn’t matter what happened to anypony else.  He was Gummy and he would act like Gummy would.  Whether the universe cared or not he would just be himself and lived as he saw fit.  Maybe that was the solution?

Maybe the grand scheme of things didn’t matter as much.  Maybe it was the little scheme that made the big scheme?  If Pinkie just lived as she wanted.  If she enjoyed her life maybe the big scheme would just click in the end?  It wasn’t that no pony mattered or that no one helped stop the worlds pain.  It was that every pony lived as they saw fit.  Healing others, helping them, being happy, it was all about choosing the path they wanted instead of the path that could be forced before them.

Maybe that path could be better but that was why you shared your ideas with the world.  You can’t force others to dance down the path you feel is right, but you can show them.  You can try to make them understand, and if they want to choose your path they can.  That was the big scheme of things.

Freedom of Choice.

Looking up from Gummy and the grass she found her friends all around her.

“Surprise!” they yelled.

Pinkie stared at them, stared at the ground, and looked back up at them.

“Hey Guys?  What do you see in the grass?”