It was an overcast day in Ponyville and everypony was doing their thing, not a problem in the world. Well, except for Derpy.
Derpy's eyes were crossed, and it was permanent. Ponies made fun of her because they thought she was stupid. Actually, she was one of the smartest students in her school when she was a filly. The only reason why she works as a mail mare is because every pony else thought that she was stupid, just by her appearance.
Derpy sighed in relief, as she had one last package to drop off, and she was early. She looked at the address on the package:
To: Doctor Whooves
TARDIS
Ponyville, Equestria
What? TARDIS? Derpy was confused. She never heard of a TARDIS before. So, she set off and started playing the game of I Spy.
It was an hour later that she found a mysterious blue box. In the middle of no where. Why? 'It must be lonely out there' Derpy thought, as she flew down to the ground. She then tried to find the doorbell, but there wasn't one. She then decided to knock on the door. Right after she knocked on the door, she was introduced to a nightmare.
"INTRUDER." A robotic voice called out, over and over again. It then brought out a laser, then a missile shooter came out.
"LEAVE. NOW." The robotic voice demanded.
"Hey, I'm Derpy Hooves! I have this package for Doctor Hooves!" Derpy yelled back in response.
"WHO. ARE. YOU?" The robotic voice asked.
"I am Derpy Hooves, the mail mare of Ponyville." Derpy calmly answered. Soon, a brown stallion walked out of the blue box.
"Hey! Shoo off! I thought I turned you off for the day!" The brown stallion commanded. The missile shooter and laser quickly retracted and was back to where it was.
"I am terribly sorry, I am the Doctor." The brown stallion greeted.
"Doctor Whooves?" Derpy asked.
"Yes." Doctor Whooves answered.
"Here is your package." She said, giving it to him.
"Why thank you. So, uh, what's your name?" Doctor Whooves asked.
"Derpy Hooves." Derpy answered.
"Now I know that's not your real name! Your eye is derped so that's what everyone calls you!" Doctor Whooves stated.
"You're right. I don't like anypony calling me by my real name, it just brings back horrible memories."
How Derpy's eye was derped was a tragedy. Her parents were abusive to her because of a critical heath condition that Derpy never knew of. They never told her.
"Where's our dinner?" Her father yelled. She locked herself in her room. She then heard her father's hoofsteps coming up the stairs to her room. He was a unicorn, which wasn't good. He unlocked the door and found his daughter easily.
"Don't you hide from me!" Derpy's father yelled at her. She whimpered as she saw a plank in the air held by his magic. He then smacked her really hard with it. So hard, that in the face (the area that he hit), Derpy's right eye (to her, left to us) was messed up. That's how her eye was derped.
"Derpy?" Doctor Whooves asked. She snapped back into reality, realizing that her face was wet with tears. She then hugged him to make herself feel better.
"Oh, I'm so sorry." Doctor Whooves apologized. "Wanna see something really amazing?" Doctor Whooves asked, trying to find something to cheer her up. Derpy just nodded her head.
The Doctor took her into the blue box. When Derpy looked up her eyes sparkled with amazement. A smile crept up on her face.
"Wow..." Derpy was stunned. Amazed. She started looking around the huge place.
"This is called the TARDIS." The Doctor told her. Suddenly, everything made sense.
"This is so cool!" Derpy complimented.
"I know." Doctor Whooves replied. "So, how about some tea and muffins?" The Doctor asked.
"Did you say muffins?" Derpy asked. "I LOVE muffins!" She added.
"Well then, what are you waiting for?" The Doctor asked.
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Derpy looked around her with amazement. The kitchen looked awesome. '20% cooler is what Rainbow Dash would've said' Derpy thought to herself.
"Now uh, let's see here..." The Doctor spoke, opening the refrigerator. "Oh my." The Doctor said aloud.
"What?" Derpy asked.
"It seems like we don't have any muffins. I thought we did. Oh-" The Doctor was interrupted by the sounds of stainless steel utensils being banged against one another. The Doctor turned around to see mail mare Derpy trying to find utensils for some odd reason.
"Uh, Derpy? What are you doing?" The Doctor asked.
"Making new muffins obviously!" She replied as though Doctor Whooves asked the most dumbest question ever.
"Oh uh... what kind to be exact?" The Doctor asked.
"What kind do you want?" Derpy asked with a smile on her face.
"Uh... your favorite I guess." The Doctor answered. "Here." The Doctor spoke, as he took off her hat and satchel.
"Thank you." Derpy thanked. She felt a warm heat rising up to her cheeks, she turned around right away, knowing that she was most likely blushing.
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The oven went off, telling Derpy that the muffins were ready. She turned the baking function of the oven off, as she put on oven mitts. She then opened up the oven door and got the muffins out.
"The muffins are ready!" Derpy called out. The Doctor came trotting down the stairs, trotting into the kitchen, and started making the tea.
"Thank you Derpy, even though we haven't known each other for a day, you are really kind and nice." The Doctor complimented.
"Aww, t-thank you." Derpy replied. She felt herself blushing again, and she quickly covered her blush with her mane.
"So, what kind of muffins did you make?" Doctor Whooves asked.
"Blueberry." Derpy replied.
"Yum!" The Doctor stated. The water hissed on the stove, telling him that the water was finished boiling. He took it off the stove and placed it on a tea plate. He then placed two tea cups and two tea spoons.
"So, Derpy..." The Doctor started.
"Hm?" Derpy muffled.
"What kind of tea would you like?" The Doctor asked.
"Green tea, if you have it." Derpy answered. The Doctor looked all over in the cupboard, afraid that there wasn't going to be a green tea bag for Derpy.
"Aha!" The Doctor cheered out triumphantly. "I've found the last green tea bag. I guess I'll have lemon grass tea." The Doctor mutterted to himself.
"Oh, you can have the green tea." Derpy said, hearing what Doctor Whooves said.
"No, it's okay." The Doctor argued.
"No, it's not. You deserve the green tea." Derpy argued back.
"Why?" The Doctor asked, challenging her.
"Becuase you are the owner of this amazing house. I'm just a guest." Derpy answered. The Doctor was shocked with the comeback.
"It's final. You are having the green tea." The Doctor stated, trying to end the argument.
"Bu-" Derpy was inturrupted.
"Nope. No but's, or whatever." The Doctor said, finishing the argument. Derpy sighed in defeat.
'All right, I guess he does have a point' Derpy thought to herself. She took her oven mitts off and found a plastic bag, placing almost all of the muffins in there. All but two. One for her, and the other for Doctor Whooves.
'Doctor Whooves' that name seemed to echo in her mind. Why? She was kind of confused. 'Do I like him more than just a friend?' Derpy asked to herself. 'No! I've only known him for a couple of hours!' Derpy disagreed with herself. Derpy placed the two muffins on the tea plate as The Doctor was trying to find the lemon grass tea. Derpy noticed out of the corner of her derped eye, a bright yellow small box. She trotted over to it, picked it up, and shook it. She then opened it, and noticed that there was tea bags in there. She smelled one of the tea bags.
'Yep, definatly lemon grass tea' Derpy thought to herself. She quietly placed the tea bag in the empty tea cup and quickly closed the box and pretended that she never did such a thing.
'This is going to be funny' Derpy thought to herself, giggling in her mind. She picked up the bag of muffins, opened the fridge, and placed the muffins in the fridge.
"Derpy, how did this tea bag get in my tea cup?" The Doctor asked. Derpy stiffled a laugh. "Derpy?" The Doctor asked. She couldn't hold her laugh in anymore. A course burst of laughter came out of her mouth. Her hooves were tightly held around her stomach. She fell onto the floor, laughing so hard. She was laughing so hard that she was crying. She didn't know why this was so funny, but she didn't question it either.
"Derpy. You fool!" Doctor Whooves kiddingly scolded. He carried the tea plate into some sort of small room with a coffee table and two chairs. Derpy got herself up and followed him to the petite room. She than sat down in one chair while The Doctor sat in the other chair when he set down the tea plate.
"So, what do you want to talk about?" The Doctor asked.
"Um..." Derpy started, taking a muffin. "Well, what is this TARDIS?" Derpy asked.
"Well, TARDIS means Time And Relative Dimensions In Space. Basically, the TARDIS can travel through space, time, and dimensions." The Doctor explained.
"Cool! Wow, you must have really exciting adventures!" Derpy stated.
"Yep." The Doctor replied. "I just need an assistant. You know, someone who can help me. It's been really hard. However, I think Twilight Sparkle may be my assistaint." The Doctor stated.
"Why?" Derpy asked.
"Well, she's smart, and is purple, and is a unicorn, and-" The Doctor was intterupted.
"WHAT? ARE YOU CRAZY?!" Derpy asked in shock.
"Gah! Well, uh... I don't know really..." The Doctor replied with a blush of embarrassment. Derpy just giggled and Doctor Whooves did the same. Derpy then grabbed the tea pot full of hot water and poured the hot water into her tea cup, which already had her tea bag in it.
The Doctor and Derpy chatted for a while. They both giggled at times, and as the hours went by, they had more and more fun they had chatting with each other. It was 3 O' Clock by the time that they were finished chatting and having tea. The Doctor then showed Derpy around to the rest of the TARDIS, and Derpy was always amazed, stunned, awed. It was 6 O' Clock by the time The Doctor and Derpy were finished with chatting even more.
"Oh my!" Derpy called out in shock. "It's 6 O' Clock! I haven't returned myself back to the post office. Oh no, oh no, oh no! I'm going to be fired, I just know it!" Derpy was starting to freak out.
"Hey, hey, hey! It's alright." The Doctor told her.
"How?!" Derpy freaked out even more. She rushed back into the kitchen to get her hat and satchel back on.
"Well, I've been thinking and..." The Doctor started.
"What? I don't get it." Derpy stated out loud out of nowhere.
"Do you want to be my new assistant?" The Doctor managed to spit out. He suddenly blushed madly. Derpy's mouth suddenly fell wide open. Her eyes became huge. She was speechless. She felt the hotness rise up on her cheeks. She was blushing madly but she was too stunned to cover it up.
"I-I..." Derpy stammered.
"Yes?" The Doctor asked, waiting for a reply.
"Yes! I want to go on all these amazing adventures you talk about, all the cool machines you use, the TARDIS, everything!" Derpy answered.
"Oh joy!" The Doctor cried out in joy. Derpy took off her jacket and threw her hat and jacket in the trash, but kept the satchel just in case. "So, what do you want me to call you now? Derpy, Derpy Hooves?" The Doctor asked.
"Call me by my real name, Ditzy Doo." Derpy Hooves answered.
"Okay, Ditzy Doo." The Doctor replied, walking upstairs to his room. Ditzy Doo followed.
She was going to have a time of her life.
