I Just Want A Quiet Life

"JoJo, let's go!" Kenneth called out, slicking back his multi-colored hair.

I sighed adjusting the blonde wig and before stepping into the car. "Please don't call me 'JoJo.' I understand that because I have the name 'Jonathan' that there are similarities but my last name isn't 'Joestar.' Besides, aren't I supposed to be 'Kira' tonight?"

"Hey, it's just a rib. And wow, you're into character already, huh?" he said with a smile as he drove the car.

"You know that it happens by the time I finish the outfit," I replied cooly, despite the annoyance I felt.

"I know, that's why I figured it wouldn't happen if the outfit wasn't finished. Still got the ties here," he said as he placed his hand on the two small boxes in his lap.

"Eyes on the road, please," I asked, feeling annoyed not only by the fact he wasn't paying attention to where he was driving but also the fact that the outfit I was wearing wasn't complete, touching the space around my neck unconsciously. And also, why doesn't he use the turn signal? He knows damn well that it's dangerous not to signal when making a turn and it attracts atten-

Damn it. Not again. Focus. My name is Jonathan Sanders, not Yoshikage Kira. Jonathan Sanders.

This ability of mine has been both a blessing and a curse for me. I find it very easy to slip into roles, and it's what inspired me to be an actor. However, after a certain… incident I've had to be very careful about what roles I choose as it becomes a little too easy to slip into them. My oldest friend, Kenneth Masters, and I are attending a nearby convention, specifically Shadocon in Tampa. Personally I wanted to go as Jotaro, but Kenneth insisted on this particular theme. I was Kira Yoshikage and he was Kawajiri Kosaku, which technically also made him Kira. I reread "Diamond is Unbreakable", or "Diamond is not Crash" if you prefer the more awkward title, to refamiliarize myself with the character. Even knowing what might happen I couldn't help it, when I assumed a role I went all out. Kenneth, on the other hand, handled the costumes, even went out of his way to make sure our bags were correct. Unfortunately, the one thing he wasn't able to make or find in time was the cat crossbones ties.

Let's just hope nothing happens… No, it won't happen. Besides, even if I do fall into the role, it's not like I can do anything bad. Kira wouldn't let himself get caught, so it stands to reason that I wouldn't try anything either.

After we finally parked we both put on our ties. It was unfortunate that they weren't exactly the same as the ones in the series, but it seems that cat crossbones design was too hard to come across for an affordable price. The two of us walked around to see the sites, posing for anyone who wanted to take pictures with us, or just asked us to pose. Some yaoi fangirls asked us to look into each others eyes longingly, but we both turned them down, Kenneth just outright refusing, much to their dismay, while I stayed more in character and informed them that our characters were rather asexual so it wouldn't be appropriate, which they were more accepting of. Overall everyone who saw us was impressed with how well we wore the costumes, and some of them even asked if they could video tape me acting like Kira instead of just looking like him. I'll admit I was a little proud of how well I was pulling it off.

At one point we decided to drop by a maid cafe that they had running, which I was interested in having never visited one before. They were doing a cosplay theme, and I sat down across a lovely in character Mitsuru Kirijo. Unfortunately, things started to go a bit downhill then as I noticed that despite her figure and ample bosoms I was paying much closer attention to her hands. I politely excused myself and Kenneth came after me, catching me heading to the restroom.

"Dude, you ok?" he asked concerned.

"This was a bad idea," I replied under my breath. "I want to leave."

"Dude, seriously, what's wrong?"

"I was focused on her hands, Kenneth. Her hands."

"Really? Oh, um, ok, maybe we better call it quits then. You go inside and calm down and I'll catch you on the way out."

"Thank you," I said before stepping inside.

I immediately took off the wig before splashing my face with water.

My name is Jonathan Sanders. Jonathan Sanders.

I sighed before looking back in the mirror, the loss of the wig enough to jar me out of the role I feared I was falling into.

Damn it, Kenneth, why did you insist on this outfit? You know about my problem better than anyone, being a victim of it. Sometimes I wonder if you're friends with me just so you can keep me around for your amusement.

After calming down I stepped outside the restroom and found Kenneth walking towards me.

"Dude, check what I found!" he called and waved two articles of clothing at me. "Some guy dressed as the RE 4 merchant was selling stuff cheap, and look what I got!"

I took a better look at them and saw that they were the same ties Kira and Kawajiri wore, the one piece of our outfits we didn't have.

"You shouldn't have bought them here. You know how expensive-" I began only for him to cut me off.

"No man, they were five bucks each! Talk about lucky!"

I sighed. "Ok, but can we leave now? I don't want something to happen."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Sorry, man, I was just so excited," he replied before wrapping his arm around my shoulders and guiding me out.

It was then I noticed something was missing. "Where's your bag?"

"Huh? Oh, I guess I dropped it somewhere."

"We should go and get-"

"No way, man. Forget it. Let's get you out of here first."

I smiled. He might have been bit selfish at times, but he did care in the end. "Ok. Thank you."

"And hey, we had a good time while it lasted, right?" he said with his own smile.

"I suppose."

"Actually, now that we've got these, why don't we take one last pic before we leave? 'Scuse me!" he called getting the attention of a girl dressed like some sort of unicorn, a purple one with wings. I think she's from that new version of "My Little Pony" everyone's been raving about. "Could you take a picture?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, ok!" she replied and took Kenneth's iPhone.

As he walked back over he undid his tie and got to work putting on the new one. "Here. Let's get it right this time," he said giving me the other tie.

I grimaced for a moment but nodded and took it after putting on my wig. Just long enough for a picture wouldn't be a problem. After it was all ready we both posed.

"Ok then!" the girl said. "In one. Two. Three!"

She pressed the flash button and I was blinded for a good three seconds. Was the flash always that bright?

"I think you need to adjust the settings, Kenneth, that was too powerful," I said as I rubbed my eyes.

However, there was no response.

"Kenneth? Are you listening to-?"

It was then I noticed something wrong. The buzz of the congoers was now replaced with what sounded like screams. I also noticed a breeze on my face, which was odd seeing as how I was just indoors.

"Kenneth?"

I finally managed to open my eyes and was shocked to find my friend was gone… as was everything else I could recognize.

All around me was pandemonium, people running back and forth screaming in-

No, not "people." Some kind of equine type creatures. They were of multiple colors and they seemed too terrified to even notice I was among them.

Suddenly something rammed into my shoulder and knocked me to the ground. I grabbed my head and-

Wait a minute… is that… my hair? But it feels like-

I could barely see it out of the corner of my eye but there was no doubt about it, my hair was now blonde and wavy instead of black and straight.

Just like Kira's.

I turned to see what knocked me over and-

What in God's name is that!?

Like everything else I could see it appeared equine in nature, but it also appeared to be insect-like as well. It hissed at me as it bared its fangs and on reflex I smacked it away, my hand stinging against its hard body. I got up and ran in the other direction only to be immediately confronted by three more of them diving right at me. In a panic I raised both of my arms to shield my face, no doubt a futile gesture, and prayed not to die.

Instead of feeling the sharp pain of fangs on my skin I heard a rapid percussion sound. After a moment of hesitation I opened my eyes and saw the three creatures on the ground, writhing in pain and holding their bodies. But what really caught my attention was the pale pink bipedal figure with feline features in front of me. It took me only half a second to realize what it was. A moment later I tried to command it and sure enough it turned around to face me, just like I wanted.

"W-What!? What in the name of the hive is that?" one of the bug creatures asked aloud.

Though the chaos resumed around me for the most part those who were within a few yards of me stopped to stare. Something inside me clicked right then, and instead of feeling fear I felt annoyance, the kind of feeling you get when you're being pestered by something clearly not worth your time. I commanded the figure to turn around and face the group that attacked me before replying.

"Killer Queen."