The Time Rainbow Dash Visited the Land of the Weird Dragon-Monkey Thingies
And Then, Out of Nowhere...
Rainbow Dash fell to the ground.
It was then that Rainbow Dash came to two conclusions. One, Twilight had a really bad aim when it came to teleportation, and two, teleportation felt weird. It was like being taken apart one by one, and then being put back together. Rainbow didn't know how unicorns put up with it.
Rainbow Dash sighed, standing to take a look at her surroundings, but then gasped in shock because her surroundings were looking at her.
Well, not her surroundings, really. But rather, the inhabitants of whatever place she ended up in. And boy, did they look strange. First of all, they stood on two legs like Spike. Second, they had no fur two speak of, but they did have manes. Well, most of them did, anyways. They were all wearing clothes and they reminded her of monkeys. Or dragons. Both, really.
It was then that Rainbow Dash had an idea.
'That's it! They must be monkey-dragon hybrids!' Dash thought. 'Of course!'
Rainbow Dash shrugged. She's definitely heard of weirder things. She smiled, having calmed down a bit. Maybe if she just kept calm until Twilight found her, she'd be fine.
Stepping forward, she outstretched a hoof in greeting for a goof. "'Sup, my name's Rainbow Dash."
One of the Monkey-Dragons looked at her as if she was a cockatrice with two heads and a thousand eyes.
From it's lips came the words: "What. The. Fuck?"
Dash gasped, "You can bucking talk!?"
And then all Tartarus broke loose. The creatures screamed and yelled, running towards and away from her. In a panic, Rainbow Dash tried to fly away but ended up smacking into a wall. Dash fell to the ground, rubbing her head.
"Ow..." She groaned. That usually didn't hurt. But it did. Why did it hurt?
Somepony or something suddenly shouted, "Holy shit, it's Rainbow Dash!"
Somepony else yelled, "What the fuck is a Rainbow Dash!?"
Wait. These things could talk and they knew her? Did knowledge of her swag carry throughout all the dimensions?
Everything was too loud and confusing. Her head hurt and she wanted no more of this. She heaved herself onto her hooves, a bit dazed. She looked to see the Monkey-Dragon Thingies scrambling about. The ones who weren't running were at least keeping a respectable distance.
One of smaller creatures looked up at a taller one, pulling on it's claw and pointing at her, "Daddy! Daddy! It's Rainbow Dash, Daddy!"
The taller one gave Dash a strange look, "What in God's name...?"
The pegasus turned her attention back to the smaller one, who was currently waving at her, "Hi, Rainbow Dash."
The cyan pony waved back, smiling nervously. Dash turned to her right suddenly to see two of the Monkey-Dragons approaching her. One seemed to be holding a small rectangular box. Dash tensed her muscles, ready to take off at any moment.
The one holding the box turned to other creature, "Shit, man, this is so goin' on Twitter."
'Twitter?' The pegasus thought. 'What's a Twitter?'
It turned toward her and smiled, "Hey, Dash! Say cheese!"
Wait, what?
SNAP!
Rainbow Dash looked herself over in a panic, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. She looked at the two hybrid-things. They were both looking at the rectangle, whispering about something being 'fuckin' sweet.'
Rainbow Dash took a few steps back, trying to decide whether or not she should get the hay out of here. The things hadn't really done anything to hurt her, but they were kind of scary. Even she could admit that. And what's up with their strange sayings? What the hay is a 'fuck'? Or a 'shit', for that matter?
"Hey, Dash?" One of the creatures holding the box called.
Rainbow Dash replied hesitantly. "Uh, Y-yeah?"
The two Monkey-Dragons smiled. The one holding the box called back, "Thanks." And then the two creatures trotted off in
a hurry.
Rainbow Dash smiled. Maybe they weren't so bad.
It was then Dash noticed the whole street was empty.
"Huh," Dash said. "Guess they left."
Looking around, the pegasus pony realized this place looked a lot like Manehattan. It's buildings were freaking huge!
She sighed. Why did she even do this? But, she knew why. Ever since Twilight went through those mirror portals, she's been obsessed with alternate universes. With a spell, she was able to actually find a few. Twilight went on with some egghead stuff, about how she'll be able to track down their equine magic and then magic them back. And, of course, the super cocky and daring pony that she was, volunteered as tribute. Well, not really as tribute, but more to show that she was the bravest and toughest pony around. Sometimes, even Dash hated how awesome she was.
The rainbow-maned pony narrowed her eyes.
'No, Dash, c,mon,' She thought. 'You gotta keep going. You made a promise.'
She then flew up into the air, getting a rather good look at the place. It really did look like Manehattan. In fact, she thought that she could maybe see the Statue of Li-Breigh-ty in the distance. Maybe. Looking down, she saw a nice billboard to land on, and went for it.
Upon landing, Rainbow Dash was barraged by...Sound. And Dear Sweet Luna, was it loud. Rainbow Dash had to take a few moments to collect herself because it was just so bucking loud.
Letting out a sigh, she held her head high, and spoke,"Hello, Monkey-Dragons. I come in peace."
Dash almost chuckled at her joke. Pinkie would be proud.
The pony waited for the screams, the random shouts, any reply at all. But none came. The creatures just hept going. Even the ones in their metal carriages paid no attention to the blue pegasus.
Rainbow frowned. What's with these things? Don't they know awesomeness when they see it!?
But, to be fair, they hadn't really looked at her. Or noticed her at all, really.
"Hey, you guys! Up here!" She called. She then proceeded to many different things to get the creatures' attention. She even did a little jig to finish it off.
Not a one looked at the talking, rainbow-maned, pegasus pony.
"Not. Cool." Rainbow grumbled in anger.
What could she do to get a reaction?
'Well, they freaked out when I crashed on the sidewalk...' RD thought.
She smirked. 'I wonder how they'll act if I land on one of their carriages.
Launching into the air, she took aim at the nearest yellow and black carriage. She successfully landed on the vehicle, though she could feel it crumple a bit from the force of the landing.
"Well, hi there." She said to the Monkey-Dragon inside the carriage.
It didn't reply. Staring, open-mouthed at her in shock.
Suddenly somepony shouted, "OH GOD IT'S BACK!"
She was suddenly surrounded by screams and shouts again.
"¡Que putas pasa!?"
"WHAT THE FUCKAZOIDZ!?!"
"Aaaaaahhhhh!"
"It's those freakin' ponies, man! Those freaking ponies!"
"Holy fuck, you guys! It's motherfucking Rainbow Dash!"
Rainbow would've felt flattered, if she wasn't so nervous.
All of sudden, a loud blaring sound erupted from the voices. A blue and white carriage rolled up onto the street. It had cool-looking lights on it.
"NOW, EVERYONE REMAIN CALM. WE HAVE HEARD SOME COMPLAINTS ABOUT A STRANGE ANIMAL." A loud came from the carriage. It sounded like it was coming from a speakerphone.
"NOW IF EVERYONE WOULD JUST REMAIN CALM AND-OHWHATTHEHELLISTHAT!?!?"
Then the voices returned, screaming and freaking out.
This species was a very panicky bunch, Dash noticed.
"WHO THE FUCK CALLS THE COPS ON A PONY!?!?!"
"I for one welcome our new pony overlords!"
"I'm gonna shoot it!"
"Bronies! It's the fucking Bronies' fault!"
"What the FUCK is a 'Bronies'!?"
And then Rainbow Dash felt the feeling of being taken apart bit by bit again. She smiled victoriously as she yelled her last words to the strange creatures, "'Kay, thanks, bye!"
__________________________________________________________________________
"So, Rainbow," Twilight said as she and the rest of the Mane Six encircled Rainbow Dash. "What was it like?"
Rainbow Dash 's face gave a pondering look. Then, she smirked.
"Well, Darling?" Rarity asked.
Dash shrugged, "Eh, it needed to be about twenty percent cooler."
Twilight facehoofed.
Author's Note
So... There you go... New story...
I don't know. I tried to make it as realistic as possible. So, I hope you enjoyed. Also, don't take this story seriously. At all. The 'Random' tag's there for a reason.
Okay.
I hope you have a wonderful day. Thank you.
