Storm

A little Death never hurt anyone. But Pain? Pain’s hurt a lot of people.

Adonicus
Day Three, Just After Noon

It all seemed to go so fast. Sage slammed into the ground, gunfire blossoming like specks of light in the fog amidst echoes off the mountain walls. I just started to run towards the wall on the far end of the bridge as the roar of hooves from behind grew deafening. That thunder would kill me if I dared stop. I blinked, and when I opened my eyes, I was on my stomach sprawled out as the crowd hurtled past me. A mare stopped to help me up. There wasn’t even time to look at her before something struck her and she fell. I blinked. I was at the wall with three rounds left in my rifle.

“Sage, take a group and go right, we’ll try to outflank them!” Rainfall shouted over the commotion. Sage was already well out of hearing range, and Rainfall couldn’t shout loud enough.

Time slowed like cheap grease on a cold winter’s day. Rainfall drifted behind me as my hooves pounded the dirt. I bit, the rifle screamed, and another raider fell to the ground hollering. A twitch of my wings worked the action as I tore on. A raider buck gripping a knife in his rotten teeth hopped off a rock to land in from of me. Yellow ichor dripped from his eyes like tears as his hooves met the ground. More still fell as the muzzle of my gun jammed into his throat. His knife flew into the air, but his scream couldn’t, not through a collapsed windpipe. I closed my eyes as the rifle kicked in my chest again, showering me with a mist of warm droplets.

“That was fucking brutal, freak!” Rainfall slammed into the scrapped skywagon I was standing behind. “Give me some cover, I’m going to try to get at that building!”

I nodded as he took off through the no-man’s land. Just as he was about to enter the building, his hoof exploded and he fell the rest of the way into cover.

“Sniper! Page, take a group of people and get to Rainfall, make sure he doesn’t die!” Who was that yelling...was it me? “Wingnut, with me, we need to move fast!” Wingnut nodded and I broke cover, sprinting to the path up the mountain. The last handful of raiders near us were either too shocked, or too drugged out to care.

I scanned the entire path up. It had to be at least a quarter-mile long. Boulders, sharp cliffs, and one raider lay ahead of us. Another bite in my chest and she fell, clutching hers. A round screamed into ground in front of me, spraying us with bits of rock. I kept running, each breath tearing at my throat as the incline took its toll. There was a glint at the top, and I dove hearing a crack louder than the gunfire below behind me. The last switchback left me gasping, finally in sight of the sniper’s shack. The sniper himself was in the process of a reload.

I stood there, bit down, click. Immediately I dropped my rifle and charged, pushing him closer to the little wall to the canyon below. For being a small buck he sure was strong...no. He was much too small, a teenager at best. He pulled a knife from out of nowhere, and I charged.

I slammed into him and his knife found my wing; we both slammed into the wall. The old plywood shattered and he fell from my grasp out into the open space, leaving his rifle at my hooves. His screams faded as he did, and I watched him fall.

That was beautiful. I reached down to pick up his rifle as Wingnut stared, eyes wide.

“What are you smiling about?” I just turned around, and looked down at the cirque the fortress sat in. Far below, the fight was ending with the last few screaming raiders being put out of their misery.

“Just thinking on how well this all went, considering.”

“Considering what? That we almost got killed? That you were almost pushed off this cliff?”

“We survived, cleared out some bad in the wastes, and now we look like a bunch of big damn heroes.”

“Well, I’m glad that you have your thoughts so figured out,” he stated flatly while swiveling his head. “I’m sitting here, wanting to go home, and suddenly get forced into killing. Albeit killing shitty scum of the planet, killing nonetheless. But, gotta do what needs to get done.” He hopped to his hooves and started back down the path. “Looks like they cleaned up down there. I’m heading back down to help, lets go.”

I nodded before looking back out over the little compound, paying special attention to the small corpse at the base of the cliff. Screams of pain, both physical and emotional resonated up the rock walls to me, sending a cold shiver snaking down my back.

“This was our fault,” I breathed to myself, slumping down around the rifle.

“Yes, it was. So what have you learned?” I leapt up, turned around and met the eyes of a white mare with green eyes, sitting there just staring at me.

“I, who, when did you get here?” I more sputtered than spoke, trying to make sense of this blonde maned mare staring at me with a borderline malicious intent.

She just sort of smiled at me. “I have been here for longer than you think, I am here to sort of, well, guide you on your journey.” She stood up, and turned to leave the shack, “Follow me, there is something you need to see.”

Acting more on instinct than free will, I followed, she was a few yards away from the shack looking north over the mountain range.

“That is quite a view.” My eyes were stuck on the vistas in front of me, the snow covered peaks, the valleys stretching down past a layer of fog that could have been the clouds themselves. A few miles out there was a thick storm wall blocking my view of anything further north, and to the west I could barely make out Alpine.

“The Crystal Empire is that way. Well what is left of the Crystal Empire. Sooner or later you and your friends are going to have to travel there. It is going to be dangerous, and cold, but I think you’ll be able to make it.”

Catching myself staring at her (what? She was pretty…) I threw my gaze out into the mountain range again.

Although I could see for a few miles, all I could see was mountains. Gray, large and imposing. Most covered in layers of ice and snow, giving them a blotchy white and black coating. I could see the wind whip snow off of them to be thrown down the mountainsides.

“Take a good look, there is a lot of danger in those mountains, and you’ll have to cross them.”

“Just who are you any-” I turned towards where she was standing to see nothing. “What the fuck…” Looking down there was a spent brass casing where she was standing. I stared at it for a second before picking it up, 7.62X51 was inscribed on the back of the case. I carefully scrutinized at the case, trying to figure out what, and why it was here, just to give up and throw in in my saddle bags. I’ll ask the others sometime.

“Dizzy! You coming or what?” came Wingnut’s voice from a little ways down the trail.

“I’ll meet you down soon enough, I just need a minute.”

Returning to the clifftop shack I grabbed the buck’s sniper rifle. A simple thing, relatively low power scope, a twenty or so inch long heavy barrel, and a ten round magazine. From just glancing at it, I gathered it was not made for battle saddle use, more to be set up in a way to be fired prone. I used a wing to drop the magazine, and work the bolt handle. A single green cartridge fell out. Steel case, still covered in its protective lacquer coating, the copper of the actual bullet was dull, but intact and practically scratch free. Really a great rifle for a raider, must have been taken with that caravan that they captured.

I strapped the rifle to my back, between my wings and again stared out over the compound. I inspected the wound the buck had given my wing to find it little more than a scratch, barely breaking the skin. “Well, what the hell, why not.” I ran as fast as I could towards the open wall, spread my wings as straight as I could, closed my eyes, and leapt out.

My wings caught air. I didn’t feel myself falling. The cold wind hitting my face felt like running into a headwind in December. I managed to open my eyes: I was a few hundred feet above the building and many ponies stopped below to stare up at me. I kept gliding down, losing altitude fast. I saw Radheart among a group of bleeding ponies. She smiled at me.

With an instinctual movement, my wings turned downwards, forcing me to go faster, but giving me almost enough lift to stay aloft, almost.

Then my entire field of view went into a glow of dark green, and I slowly drifted to the ground.

“Not quite up to flying yet?” Page smiled beside me, his coat having more black splotches than stripes. He let go of his magic, letting me fall the final few feet to the rocky ground. I landed with all the grace of a tank driving off a building.

“Guess not,” I replied, “what happened to you? You look like you just finished a shift in a coal mine.”

Page gave a smug and icy grin, “Oh, don’t worry, I got a little carried away with the fire…and stuff...on a few of those raiders. Glad I made the will saves back there though; I’m covered in pony.” Page continued to stare at me with the façade of a madman. “Looks like you found a new toy there,” he said, gesturing to the rifle on my back.

“Yeah, they had a sniper up on the ridge, I figured he didn’t have much use for it anymore.”

I returned a little smile, then turned to head back to the building, when a light pink blob assaulted me, throwing me to the ground. The blob started to laugh while crushing the wind out of me. “You actually flew! Finally, you have no idea how much this means to me!” Of course it was Radheart.

“What do you mean ‘means to you’?” She released me, and I clambered to my hooves, flapping my wings to try and dissipate the the pain throbbing from being thrown to the rocky ground.

“Morningside and I had a bet, to see which one of you would learn to fly first, you or Sage. I am now twenty caps richer!” Radheart could hardly contain herself; apparently she really liked money.

“I don’t know that I’d call that flying, Rads,” Rainfall limped up with a group of ponies in tow, his leg was bandaged, but red was clearly overtaking the white wrappings. “I need your plaything for a while, he needs to get his parts for our generator. You can have him back for ‘celebrating’ later.”

Radheart gave me a look, and smiled (probably at how red my face was at figuring out why she was so happy) before shooing me off to go get what I needed.

********************************************

Ashen Shield
Day Three, Just After Noon

A horde of ponies pushed past. Their bodies were not cheerful colours in this light. Sweat of fear and mist matted the coats and dragged their wearers down. It was like watching a bad painting run past with the colours all dripping down the canvas all clumpy, old and dried. The animation was badly blurred, and it stuttered and hiccupped like bad stop-motion.

I didn’t remember being left, just suddenly found myself standing there alone on the hill. The need for hush was palpable. I watched them still, from above, not really focusing on individuals. Not that from this distance it would be reasonable.

I should be doing something...I should go...

I guess...

But only the air changed as it bit me cold. As if the wetness in it had not tormented me sufficiently. And even still I did not move. Glued, I could only watch the sea of colour that would soon funnel into red. The ponies became steadily more visible until with one final gust of wind, I sat, and hugged myself closer together, shivering, teeth and hooves clacking.

My head snapped up. If I could hear them from here, something was wrong. The one at the front...Sage? had fallen somehow. He lay splayed out, backwards, facing the horde. A shot sounded from somewhere...the world held its breath. Then with a cry everything was motion again.

They stacked up at both entrances. A machine gunner struck down ponies from above...And so we sink. Charging into our own blood. Into their own blood.

I shuffled my hooves and stared at my weapon as it sat on the ground. I glanced up, but could not watch. My stomach sank. Deserter. Useless. Coward. Legs still lead. Moisture sprang unwanted in my eyes. The dirt here wasn’t as grey as the dirt there. Fine powdery dirt. More brown here...

I don’t know how long I sat there. It was impossible to figure without much sun around. I only know that I did, barely moving, barely breathing. Heart like a rock, stomach empty. Good. Be hungry, bitch. Whiny, whiny bitch.

Everyone heard. It was impossible not to. Fuckin’...watch the ponies perched on the edge as down fell the screaming raider. Like a movie scene with the wrong side at the top of the hill. Definitely was a good place for the Wilhelm to make an appearance. Missed opportunity right there, director. You done goofed. His was not as good. 5/10 at best.

It was the first time I’d looked up -- really looked up since they prepared to enter the structure. I took an assessment. The ponies at the top I thought might be Wingnut and Dizzy...and atop the structure stood...Spring and Sage? Holy shit...if that’s...really him...so much blood. Nose to tail. Yet he stood. He moved fine...my brow furrowed. I hurriedly studied him again, but nothing more could be discerned from this distance. I started forward, forgetting my surroundings. The sound of a squeaky toy graced my ears (me?), followed by the cloud of dirt in my nose and the muddy mouth as I slid several feet down the hill. Brilliant.

“Hey, you!” I slowly coughed the dust and mud out, trying to right myself.

“Hey! I’m talking to you. Make yourself useful and carry some supplies down at least, will ya?” A brown colt, too young to be there materialized behind the dust.

“Shouldn’t you be back home?”

“You’re one to talk. Dirtiest you got all day was falling on yer face.” I opened my mouth, then slowly closed it. Kneading my cheek between my teeth I watched his face.

“Well...what do you need?” The colt handed me a stack of things medical in nature. Hoofed me?

“Stop staring, you lout. Move your hooves. Radheart’s down there. Find her.” I hurried with greater care down the hill.

Blood. Only blood. The colour. The smell. Underhoof the slick feel. Slick and sticky both. I picked my way around the dead the dying and the wounded. I stepped awkwardly out of the way of busy ponies. I kept my head down and my supplies up...ok mostly up...ok nowhere to set them, so I’d better find her soon…there!

She wheeled on me. I jumped about a foot up and several steps back. She said nothing, equally startled by a pony being so close, the pony being me, and the supplies I wielded. Her eyes narrowed. Remaining mute, but unflinching in her gaze, I brought them closer. I wasn’t there before. I was here now though. She took them hastily by some process I couldn’t fathom. I hadn’t collapsed...not that I felt particularly capable of much else at the moment.

Looked like I wasn’t the only one who’d found her either. Stalemate hovered over a patient, his magic doing...something. I craned my neck, but was forced to focus on the thing blocking my view. I followed its contours until it became recognizable. She looked at me expectantly. My eyes widened. Aw shit...

“Say again, ma’am?” If the colt thought I could be of use then ok. My breath caught as I realized my weapon wasn’t within any kind of reach...arm...hoof, mouth, magic...no time. Focus.

“You’re in the way. Since you obviously don’t know what you’re doing at least move.” I moved...but came with.

She stood with the next patient, calculating. Her face never changed expression as she walked from the pony, not dead, but apparently not to be saved today. I looked at him again.

“Hey!” She did not turn. “Hey he could make it! Just a couple sutures and maybe a transfusion--” I looked back up. Her face was stone.

“You find some supplies, you just give me a shout. I have work to do.”

I stared into his face, and sat with him. He was too far gone to know, but I lay there, in the gore, curled next to his grey, blood-speckled back until his chest stopped its halting rise and fall, blood still trickling out. Briefly I rested my chin on his cheek. I did not cry.

I stood, peering around. Stalemate was there.

“There was nothing for him.” He was fighting it, convincing himself.

“I know...she told me.”

“Gotta move on.” I stared at the corpse.

“Take this.”

“What?”

“Take this.” My magic touched his. The sensation was like two hands atop one another when one clasped an object and the other clasped both. It was eerily detached from the rest of me. I didn’t stop to look at what I had taken from him.

“Follow me.”

I did. I did not see. I did not smell. I did not think. I did not feel. I did only what Stalemate instructed.

But slowly I began to listen, to understand. If they bled here or there what to do. Where and how to bandage. What we had supplies for. What we could do if we had other supplies. Bits of his excited babble made it through. Just hearing him talk like he did about his classes or chess or EMT school or girls or anything else he found interesting. It was a comforting bit of home. I focused on the things he told me more because he found them interesting than because I did. He found them interesting, and that was enough.

It felt like forever in a sea of words and patients. And then I noticed Radheart again. Her countenance was soft now, not the stony face of grim necessity. It nearly glowed. Her hair pulled back was lovely, really.

“You ok, too? I honestly didn’t see you down in the fight.”

“I...” I shuffled my hooves. She waited a minute, undoubtedly ascertaining my guilt.

“Sage is ok.” I inhaled sharply, meeting her gaze.

“Thanks...for that.” I dropped the tension from my shoulders, unsure when it had gotten there.

“Thought you’d want to know.” A smile...What did she want? Manipulative bitch. But I searched, and could find nothing but...genuine compassion? I shook my head hard.

“What’s next?” A flat demand for purpose.

“Home, of course.” My stomach growled.

“Not...food?” Her laugh was like...bells. Oddly appealing. I narrowed my eyes. She dug in her supplies for something and set it in front of me. Berries? I sniffed. Did horses even eat berries? I put one on my tongue, watching her face . She laughed again. I pulled back. She sighed and took one from the small group, and ate it. I stared down at the rest, considering. My stomach growled again. I kneaded my cheek between teeth, then ate the rest quickly.

“What do you need?” The job wasn’t done until we were home.

“That’s all you can do, really. I have to find some strong folk to help get the ones home that can’t walk, and we have to transport the goods as we need too.” Before I could protest, she had gone; Stalemate had left before ‘really’ had finished leaving her mouth. Tails to chase, if they were alive.

I had Sage to find...and more importantly my weapon...it should be over here...

********************************************

Sky Sage
Day Three, Early Afternoon

For all the thousands of daydreams, games, and discussions of what it would be like to take the life of another, none of it could have prepared me for the aftermath. Taking a life? That was the easy part. Facing down the bore of a rifle, realizing that you have to pull the trigger to avoid death, and giving in to the primal urge to survive. After all, only two types of people come out of such a trial: the killers and the dead.

Then there was the second time. It had been every bit as necessary, just as coerced, and probably saved more lives. Whooptie-fucking-doo. Now that it was all done, raider blood was drying into my coat again, reeking of carrion. Casting my gaze from the mountaintop to the ongoing triage inside the old fort caused flakes to lightly crack and fall from my coat.

I’d somehow wandered up to the path that I’d seen Dizzy and Wingnut run from afar. Here the air tasted a little less like blood and a little more like the clean zephyrs of the mountain. A little more mist on my lips, a little less death in my nostrils. For a fleeting moment that peak called out, a height of unfathomable nostalgia before me. Yet what would be up there? Just the site of another soul pushed from the brink of life into death, and a pretty view. The living were here, crying out, screaming for mercy. I’d had enough time for myself.

Carts were the most useful pony invention after fire, I had decided. Magic made a great substitute for precision measurement tools, electricity, and medicine, but it couldn’t hold a candle to the wheel and its derivatives. With the power of four of them and a panel of wood, one pony could haul several times his weight for hours upon end. Or, in the case of a hundred-some-odd villagers, haul their dead and wounded companions and whatever scraps of salvage the raiders used to own.

Across the bridge and for the first three miles of the trek back to town, the crimson earth pony buck in the cart latched to my midsection had gasped and whimpered at every rock and bump we hit. I couldn’t blame him. He was missing one eye, probably lost at the same time he got the gash running diagonally across his face. One patch of cloth taped over opposite sides of his midsection made a solid case for a sucking barrel wound.

He’d fallen unconscious somewhere around the time I’d lost all track of where we were. The mountains were darker without a creeping coat of mist hanging off every surface. Without the clouds to scatter the ambient light, the woods on either side reached out like starving souls begging for help. Images of being stuck out here at night flashed through my mind and I shook them off, favoring the waking world instead.

Page was covered in soot again. Judging by the smile that had somehow stuck for the last hour, the fire magic had come in handy. At least he was in one piece. Stalemate on the other hand was drenched in drying blood to the end of each of his forelegs and around the corners of his mouth. He looked utterly blank, eyes still forward with their typical faded conviction, each stride measured, as if nothing of note had occurred today and he was just taking a walk. Wingnut had tried to talk to me for a while, but I just couldn’t seem to entertain the conversation. He needed to get his mind off the fight just as much as I did, but I just couldn’t do it. Small talk was too obvious.

Like half the able-bodied stallions in the crowd, Dizzy was towing a cart filled with all manner of old appliances and motor parts. Odd ends of scrap metal had been slipping off the edges as we trekked along. At first I’d wondered if it was Dizzy who’d commandeered so much scrap, but judging by his tired gait and gasping breath, I was beginning to suspect Rainfall had been calling the shots.

Radheart had been more or less hanging onto Dizzy the entire trip back, talking his ear off. For Ash’s part, she’d done the same to me, save for the talking part. She strode just close enough that our coats would touch some of the time, a soft thrill against the menial reality that was the second march in a day.

I wanted to just stop, leave the cart, leave everything and let them go on past. Ash would help me out of the harness, and I’d hold her there amongst the trees and peaks. But life didn’t afford such luxuries, and no one else would get my dying cargo back home. Instead, we’d be trekking on tired legs and arguing with our own tired minds. Unbidden, my father’s words sprung to my mind.

Dominic, we’re gonna walk ‘til our feet our feet are bloody stumps!

Shut up, dad.

You’re supposed to say ‘Aww dad, we only did that once!’

Yeah, fuck that.

********************************************

Adonicus
Day Four, Late Afternoon

With a rather rough grinding noise and a strong whir the generator started to spin up. The clutch I had to improvise into the machine was crude, and wouldn’t last long if it was beat on…mental note, tell Rainfall not to fuck with this too much. The grinding noise started to wean off as the rotor matched the speed of the input shaft. I looked around the generator one last time, inspecting the bearings, the fan, and the brushes to check for anything out of place, or where a bit of extra grease could be needed. Placing a few globs of the old axle grease on a few offending squeaks I gave a smile to my work and headed for the door.

Outside I gave a nod to Sage, who threw a switch. All the lights in the town instantly flashed on, blinding me through my sunglasses. The resulting cheer from the townsponies then knocked out a second sense. Once they were done I could hear Rainfall congratulating us.

“You fuckers actually did it!” I managed to open my eyes a bit as they adjusted to the intense light. “The lights in the town haven’t been this bright in years!” I thought I could actually see a legitimate smile on his face.

“Well, can we call our debt paid in full then?” Sage wandered in closer to talk to Rainfall over the still rather loud crowd.

“We will have to talk about that later, for now though, we have to celebrate by burying the rest of the dead.”

At that the crowd lost ceased its clamor, and started to walk, well mostly limp back to their homes. Rainfall in turn motioned for us to follow him before trotting back to the clinic where we’d left Wingnut, Ash, and Stalemate to help with the wounded.

The clinic had ponies running around constantly but still felt like death itself was inside. Some were running back and forth carrying assorted bandages, gauze, and buckets full of deep red water. Some others were standing over their loved ones as they either waited to get patched up, or waited to die. The screams of agony made the clinic feel smaller, and darker, especially as one moan softened, before stopping completely. Rainfall led us through the room, I tried to avoid stepping in pools of blood on the ground, but it really was impossible. Once I got to the staircase in the back I stopped to stare out over the room.

The floor was covered with ponies, and blood. Some were covered in sheets, some were just left to stare at the ceiling until one of the ponies running about found them. The doors to the surgery room flung open as a gurney with a pony shaped, red stained sheet rolled out. Radheart was standing there, as I caught her glance. She looked exhausted, but still bore a face of determined fury. I nearly jumped and fell down the stairs when I felt a hoof prod my side.

“You’re kind of in the way.” Ash was looking up at me, “Are you going to be alright?”

I looked back down at her, trying to hide what I was thinking. Judging the look on her face, I wasn’t doing well at all. “I’ll be fine, just really can’t stand the smell of blood like this.”

The bedroom of the clinic was familiar to me for all the wrong reasons, just being in here made my stomach twist as if I had just downed a bottle of ipecac. I found myself staring at that bed. Sheets still flung about, with a pillow laying on the floor next to it, one that I had slept on the night before. And the night before that. Rainfall’s voice broke me out of my stupor.

“We need to talk about your future here.” He sounded lot more like a employer trying to gently bring out the next round of layoffs instead of a victorious leader.

“We’re seen as heroes and are going to get a house of our own to live in while continuing to help this community?” The sheer level of optimism in Page’s voice made me roll my eyes.

“No, a few of the influential voices around want you gone. You wandered in here, shut down our power supply, and got us into a fight with raiders that no one was really ready for. You have caused more trouble than you have fixed. We will be burying our friends long after you leave. However, that being said, I have a friend over in Denspur that could use your expertise since you two are now both, and I use this term lightly, professionals.”

“I don’t know what you mean.” Sage sounded as puzzled as he looked.

“You and the freak have your cutiemarks now.” I flung my head back to look at my own ass. Sure enough I saw an image of a gray box end wrench and a flat-head screwdriver, with a black handle crossed in an ‘X’ pattern.

Sage said what I thought, “How the hell did that happen?!”

Rainfall gave a little chuckle, “When you hit that switch and the lights came back on I saw them appear, you two weren’t lying when you said you knew what you were doing.”

“Guess not,” I said more systematically than anything. I looked over to Sage to see a bolt of electricity surrounded by ones and zeros on his flank. “The hell does that even mean?”

“I think it’s an arc flash with binary around it.” Sage was lost to the world, staring at his own butt.

“If we could get back on topic for a second,” Rainfall interrupted. “I am grateful for what you kids did here, and I am not the only one. You still need to leave. You don’t have a home here. A place to visit every now and then might even be pushing it. A lot of this town will see their friend’s deaths on your shoulders.”

“And you see this as an excuse to just kick them right out, and send them on a journey across the lower tundra all the way to Denspur? That is one hell of a thing to do.” Radheart was standing in the doorway leading to the downstairs with Stalemate taking advantage of his position behind her to take a long glance at her tail. When he saw me take notice I swear he took half a step back; I couldn’t figure out why.

“So what? They have proven they are capable fighters, they will be fine. Denspur is no more than two days’ walk from here.”

Radheart threw her stained apron to the floor, shouting. “Two days out there!? Even if they knew the area, even if they had supplies! What about the storm?! There is no way they’d be able to make it.”

“What would you have me do? Let them stay here to get lynched in the middle of the night as the town falls apart around our hooves!”

Radheart sighed, her ears drooping as she slipped to sitting on the floor. “I know you’re right Rainy, but I can’t just let them go out there alone.” She looked up at me, “I am going with them.”

“What?!”

“Oh hell no.”

“The fuck?!”

Rainfall nearly fell to the floor himself, “You’re our doctor; you know we can’t survive without you.”

“Look, I haven’t done much more than patch up a few cuts and bruises since I took over. There are a whole group of ponies down there who are more than capable of handling anything you might see; you really don’t need me. If nothing else, Spring can take over this place until we get back.”

I stared at the floor, “Can I get a word in?” A few different eyes locked on me, “I really don’t think you should be coming along with us.” Radheart’s face seemed to break even more. She looked one step away from crying. “They need you more here than we do. We’re not complete fools, we can handle ourselves out there.”

“I…you and I need to talk.” Radheart kept her face glued to the floor, “Can everyone give us a little privacy please?” She looked around from person to person as they slowly left the room. As Ash passed by me her eyes seemed to linger. She knew that this was going to hurt. It still needed to be done, for my own sake as well as Radheart’s. Soon enough it was just Sage, Radheart, and myself in the dark bedroom.

“Whatever you tell him, you can tell me.” Sage stood tall, spoke deeply, and fire burned in his eyes. It looked like he was more giving an order than anything else.

“Sage, please.” I looked at him, “I can handle this.”

He took a second to just stare at me, comprehending the bucket of water I had just thrown on his inner fire, before walking slowly out. At the click of the door’s latch Radheart spoke. “I was talking to your friends recently. Was that really your first time? With me?”

I couldn’t stand to look her in the eye. “It was,” I felt my face turning red.

“And does it really mean something more to you than just sex?” She was trying to hold something back. Probably hope.

“It really does. I know it sounds cheesy, but I wanted my first time to be with someone I truly loved. But Wingnut needed help, and I had the option to do something.”

“We could have figured something out.”

I just stared at the floor. “We really couldn’t, you can’t just help every random wounded who walks into your clinic for free.”

Radheart stood up and walked over to me, sitting down right in front of me. “I thought you enjoyed it, I thought you wanted to be with me.”

“I…once again this is going to sound silly, but I have not even had a marefriend before. I was just happy to finally have someone to hold. I guess I did sort of like it, if just for that.”

There was a small pause, neither of us knowing what to say. Radheart finally broke it, “If you don’t want me to come along, I’ll stay back here. I don’t have to go. You can forget about me. You know, I thought we might of had something for a while. If in just for those little talks we had before falling asleep together. I thought you might have...might have actually loved me.”

In a romance movie this would be when the guy in my place would look up, embrace the woman, and tell her that he did, in fact, love her. I am not big on romance movies. “I got caught up in the moment, you used me. No one wants to feel used.”

“I…I guess that settles it then.” She let her head point to the floor, her shoulders sagging as a drop of something hit the floor between her forehooves.

You have to care about someone to be hurt by them. “Those stories you told me, why did you?”

“In my life I’ve had only had three stallions that I loved. You are the third. I saw you, and yes I thought I could get away with just using you for a night then forget. I guess after those nights, of you holding me, and telling me of who you are, I got sloppy. I never intended to fall for you, I just did. I must have a thing for lost souls.”

“I really don’t know what to say.” I looked up at Radheart…. no, Radiant Heart. Her name finally made sense to me, she isn’t so much a doctor as she is a lover. Going out into the wasteland to find hopeless souls and show them something better, give them hope.

I still have no idea what possessed me to do this, but as I looked at her, I reached out and kissed her.

We had done a lot of kissing in the past few nights, so I had some idea of what I was supposed to do. However I had never kissed her, it always the other way around. I all but smashed my face against hers, but she didn’t recoil. If anything she pushed back at me. After about a second she broke the kiss, giving a small smile. I tried to match it, but really couldn’t. I saw a tear roll down her cheek.

“So, you’ll let me come?” She wiped the tear away, eagerness slowly shoving the sorrow out of her complexion.

“I can’t tell you what to do. I just want this to work. I want something between you and I.”

“It’s only equine to want to be close to another.” She buried her face in my chest, “Does this mean you don’t want to have sex anymore?”

As with most of the stuff she did, this caught me off guard. I tried, really tried to say something. Nothing came out other than a few half-cough-half-word stutters. Heat swarmed my cheeks, further hampering my efforts to think of some halfway decent response. Radiant just giggled and wrapped her hooves around me.

“We should get downstairs, gather our things for tomorrow. It’s going to be a long walk.”

With that Radiant walked to the stairs, giving a little sashay with her tail. The little hamster in my head was still trying to find its wheel again making me just sit there for a while before following her down.

********************************************

Sky Sage
Day Four, Early Evening

Page had finished sorting the half-dozen saddlebags full of random loot he’d scrounged off the raiders by the time I got down to the basement. What used to be a massive pile in the middle of the floor had now been organized from shortest to tallest, with nine-mil rounds on one end and a pile of rusty rebar rods on the other. The middle of the pile had room for several other kinds of brass, tattered boxes and rusty cans of aging food, and an odd mix of drug inhalers and syringes. Those last few had me worried.

“We didn’t get many caps, and the townsfolk took the best of the food. But hey, kids, wanna buy some candy?!” Page smiled and cast a hoof out, displaying the entire array to us. The concrete basement and grimy light bulb gave his presentation all the charm of a suburban drug deal. “Now who wants what?”

I still had an almost full sack of ammo that Copper had missed in his victory-induced drunken stupor, but no one else had a weapon that took five-five-six, so I slid the thirty-some-odd rounds into the bag to clink along with the rest. By the time I worked my way down to the food end of the pile, Ash and Wingnut had pilfered almost everything, leaving me with two tins of baked beans. Joy. The one thing that hadn’t been touched once everyone stood back were the chems.

“No takers?” quipped Page, looking at each of us in turn. “Oh well, I’ll keep these then.”

Glass clattered as he swept them into his bags. So that was it then, we were all packed to leave. I was cross that Rainfall was giving us the boot, but it was understandable. And we even got to bring Radheart with. Everypony wins.

Stalemate interrupted by trotting into the middle of the group with his head held high, proudly displaying the bandolier of purple phials around his midsection. There had to be at least three dozen of them, about two ounces each if I had to guess. Healing potions?!

“Sawyer? Where did you get those?” Wingnut was looking Stalemate up and down side to side, mouthing his count of vials.

Stalemate grinned. “Well, turns out if you smash up gems and mix ‘em with whiskey, and then zap them with magic, they turn purple and don’t get you drunk anymore.”

“And how do you know that?” The fact that he wasted a half-dozen healing potions was appalling. I hadn’t seen a gem yet since we got to this forsaken place and he’d just tried them for kicks?

“Well, I had a whole bunch so I chugged a few.” He shrugged, and I started swallowing a dozen sighs and protests.

Wingnut finished counting. “Thirty-five! Like how the hell did you figure out how to make healing potions?!”

“Uh, Radheart mentioned it while we were fixing people? So I did it? I thought they might come in handy later. Also, I got to get into the whiskey. Why does it taste like apples here?”

Idea!

“Funny you should ask, leme tell you a story…”

Morning person syndrome was in full effect well before the night became day. I’d never had trouble sleeping in noisy environments, but trying to catch shuteye a floor beneath the emergency ward was new. Every time I thought I’d managed to slip far enough into unconsciousness, a new moan would shudder down the stairs and hang in the air. Each cry and whimper was preternaturally loud to my large, shaggy ears.

The smell was worse.

Fresh blood ran on the floorboards above us, buried under the biting odor of the grain alcohol Radheart had used when she ran out of sterilizing ointment. That blood was barely olfactible and there was not a trace of laughter, but every bit of it dragged me back. Running headlong past the bullets, the rising reek of decay, blood on my hide, it was all too close.

I squeezed Ash for what had to be the fortieth time that night. She hummed faintly and squeezed me back. Moments passed, and her grip loosened as she slipped back into sleep. Feelings of weight settled into place against the back of my eyes and neck as sleep descended on me once again and dreams reached up to claim my consciousness. Surrendering to that darkness, I sighed into Ash’s mane and closed my eyes.

The maelstrom of dreams was no more vivid than usual, and it ebbed and flowed until hooves clunked on the basement stairs.

“Time to get up, gang.” Radheart didn’t sound like a morning person at all. Either that or she didn’t wanna let go of Dizzy...bad brain. No.

To be fair, I didn’t want to let go of Ash very much, and when I tried to slide out of bed, she didn’t let go of me. Hugging problems and trouble getting out of bed aside, we all found ourselves back around Radheart’s table once again, shoveling breakfast into our faces in anticipation of a long trip ahead.

Words rose unbidden to my mind again, except this time they belonged to Ash. You can tell that food has been served because it gets very quiet. Hunger sure made the food go down, but the silence hung heavier than seven hungry souls eating oatmeal.

What was there to say? We were walking out on a town with many wounded and taking their doctor with us because she wanted tail from my best friend. Only the unknown awaited us, and it probably wasn’t going to be as kind as Alpine had been. Chasing the thoughts in circles wouldn’t make their causes go anywhere.

Soon Page left to make sure all our gear was in order, as did Wingnut. I didn’t really feel the need. We’d packed everything the night before, and hadn’t unpacked it since. Stalemate and Ash left with grim expressions, going to check on the patients one last time. Soon I was alone at the table, as Radheart and Dizzy cleaned off the dishes.

With the care of a mother going wiping the brow of her child, Radheart dried each plate and set it out to dry. The stack was slowly growing, and with bowl in the pile her vigour faded a little. That towel dried slower and slower until she was barely going over each plate before setting it on the pile. I thought I understood her sentiment. At least got to choose to leave her home behind.

For his part, Dizzy didn’t seem to be a great deal of help. Without magic he was reduced to taking the dirty plates and moving them into the sink. Nothing was tense about his frame, and the few times his wingtips brushed against Radheart he continued on in silence. More than anything his head drooped slightly in the grip of a body clock still refusing to acknowledge consciousness.

Mine was still catching up, so it was a little surprised fifteen minutes later when it found us passing through the north gate of the town, weighed down by saddlebags and wrapped in winter saddle blankets. They were a little too warm, but they were a quick sell when Radheart told us that it was only early autumn. Dizzy had rigged a loop around my carbine so it could hang from the saddlebags just within mouth’s reach, in case I needed it quickly. The horse things never seemed to end.

Light was slowly coming to the world, a dark gray ambiance slowly emerging from the black to reveal the land but impart no warmth. In the wan illumination, the ground appeared less brown from the dead grass underhoof and more gray from the clouds above.

‘Gate’ was a kind word for the pine planks lashed together with twine between towers made of the same. Did anypony consider what might happen if a raider shot a fire spell at the whole mess? The whole damn town was made of the stuff.

The guards were even more bundled up than we were. A night out in that weather couldn’t have been fun for them. Vaguely, I felt sorry for those souls that had to sit out for an entire frosty night, staring at the dark void of the hills under no star or moon, praying nothing stirred to make their night less boring.

“Hey peg-ass-sus! Gonna go report back to your enclave buddies now?”

Ok, less sympathetic now.

“They saved every caravan coming into this town for years to come. Merit a thank you?” Radheart was clearly not a morning pony.

“And they got my sister badly wounded. Save her, will ya? Oh wait, you’re taking off with them.” The buck shook his rifle in the air while his companion climbed down and started to open the gate. “Go on now, take our ‘saviors’ and get!”

Ash paused, staring at the ground with glassy eyes before closing them tight again. I felt my anger flare, but there really wasn’t any use in shouting back. Trying to bring logic to an emotional argument was like bringing a toothpick to a dogfight. Right or not, that guard would blindly carry on his side, drawn by grief. It wasn’t my choice! I wanted to scream. Your mayor pushed us and all of you into it! Don’t you idiots think?

Taking a deep breath of the cool, dry air, I once again gazed into the rugged and scarred plains that covered the expanse before us. The first dozen yards in every direction had long since been stamped flat and devoid of vegetation. Several worn paths led off into the grass on the edges of the gate, the faintest one leading dead forward to the north. Radheart started toward it, and we followed one by one.

Every bit of ground was the same coarse, rough, dying grass that we’d plodded over in the last week, but this time each step was sure. This time, Wingnut was walking alongside us instead of lying comatose on our backs. Stalemate wasn’t swearing at everything in life and the afterlife, and Page wasn’t randomly blasting and throwings rocks.

Counting blessings continued as I trailed behind Dizzy. We had guns, ammo, food, and nice warm blankets, and a new medic. She led us on up the side of a ridge, still following that same hoof-trail. Radheart was our guide to the wastes, our doctor, and the one pony Stalemate seemed to respect. Even though we were due to travel to another unknown place, I knew I could take heart in the knowledge that we weren’t so helpless or clueless. I pushed my stride to reach the top of the ridge, enthusiasm greeting each step, only to almost run over Dizzy at the top. He’d stopped to stare into the cold wind gusting over the ridge.

A gray so deep it almost yielded to black covered the entire north edge of the sky, slowly expanding toward us. Flickers of lightning danced between the clouds, too far away to hear. The massive storm glided through the heavens, eating up the calm gray of the morning cloud cover like a cancer spreading across a victim. Chill wind blew my mane and tail into a winding mess behind me, and reached icy fingers under my saddlebags and blankets to steal away what warmth I already had.

“Can’t we wait it out?” I begged some kind sanity from Radheart. She stared off into the darkness, slowly shaking her head.

“Perhaps if we had a hundred years. That’s not a natural storm, nor is created by the pegasi. It belongs to the windigos of the northern wastes, and has not ceased for as long as living memory serves. It might move a little yes, but go away? Never.”

We all stared for a few moments before she started down the ridge with a backward cry of “Come on!”

Dizzy spoke for all of us. “Well fuck.”

********************************************

Adonicus
Day Five, Afternoon

The sleet we had been walking through for the past hour or so was finally turning into full-on snow. So there’s that. The trail was incredibly slippery, the rain slowly turning into a slushy, icy mess that turned the path into a thick brown sludge. Did I mention that the wind was directly in our faces and we really didn’t have the gear to protect ourselves against this sort of onslaught?

“Raiders, sure. Twice even. Snow, well fuck.” I mumbled under my breath, trying to not let anyone around me hear. Bitching is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but you don’t really get anywhere with it.

That and I really didn’t think anyone else could hear me over the screaming of the wind. Wait, wind doesn’t scream…not like that.

“Everyone stop!” I looked up, searching around for anything out of place. It was my turn leading the group, plowing through the knee deep snow, so the others had to stop or risk running into me. I got a lot of odd stares from the group, as Sage slogged up to me.

“What is it? Do you see something?” His words were slow and slightly slurred, proving that his lips were every bit as numb as mine.

“No, I hear something. Not sure what. Just let me listen for a second.”

I closed my eyes, trying to concentrate on the wind. Through the intense howl I could make out the sound of a…something.

“I hear something, it doesn’t sound good. Like some animal screaming in pain. It also sounds rather far off, I think if we keep moving we should be able to avoid it.” The wind sort of carried my voice but I could still tell that Ash and Stalemate at the back couldn’t hear me. Sage did, and moved up alongside Radheart heading toward where I stood.

“Sounds like a plan, I’ll take the lead for now, about time we switched over anyway.”

I gave a short nod to Sage as he shoved aside enough snow to stand in front of the group. In that breath of time, he was now pushing through the deep snow, breaking apart the hard-frozen top and making just enough of a route for the rest of us to follow. I fell in line as a fresh gust of freezing sleet hit my face. I heard that scream again. “Windigoes.”

“What?” I could barely make out Radiant’s voice from behind me.

“The windigoes, they’re kind of close. It has to be them.” A short burst of wind reminded me of how I couldn’t feel either of my ears. It really wouldn’t have been that bad if the wind would just fucking stop for a few seconds. My legs would have probably been hurting if the snow packed against them wasn't removing any semblance of feeling. The only reason I could lift my head at all was because of my sunglasses protecting my eyes from the onslaught of flying snow. Didn’t protect the rest of my face from being practically sandblasted though.

“We need to keep moving, if we stay here we are going to freeze to death.” Sage was yelling over his shoulder, trying to let everyone in the group know.

That boy was going to get at least half of us killed by the time we got to where we were going. Calling it right here.

There really wasn’t anything more to say. The windigoes were there, far enough away to not really be a problem right now. We had more pressing matters to attend to. Problems like not freezing to death in this fucking storm. All we could do was put our heads down, and keep putting one hoof in front of the other -- with the winter storm continually reminding me of how much it hated me.

********************************************

Sky Sage
Day Five, Night

Evening came in its own time, only heralded by the darkness dropping further around us like a snuffer slowly lowered over a candle. I was numb. From brow to wingtip to tail to hoof, I felt nothing at all. The winter blankets carried no warmth once soaked as thick as my coat. Whatever food the others had packed in boxes was sure to be ruined. That canned food seemed pretty good now, but only because I was starving.

I’m not sure anyone had gotten used to the insane braying. At least I think it was braying. Damned hard to tell against the wind and the snow. The howling gusts served to unnerve me only until I got too cold to care anymore. Then I didn’t stop to care. Shoving snow aside was a chore, one that we rotated off and on for five minutes at a time. One slice of time every half hour of clearing snow that sometimes got as deep as chest high so everyone else could walk through was enough to exhaust everyone.

So long as everyone kept moving, we’d make it to the other side, and figure out what to do then. There was nowhere out here to take shelter, no wood dry enough for a fire, and no way we’d ever keep it going if by some miracle it would light. Page had tried to warm us all with magical fire once the snow started to get really deep, and it had worked, but it was only a brief respite before we all grew cold again. Then it was back to the slog, step after stride after step keeping us alive and carrying us to the edge of the storm.

The hour was late when the snow curtain pulled away from the air, and we’d long since been relying on Radheart’s pipbuck. The map it showed allowed her to lead us straight toward Denspur regardless of the weather, and the lamp in the front stopped us on several occasions from falling off ridges and into ravines. When the flakes faded away from that light, the snow was hard packed and frozen on the ground, the winds settling to a whisper under the starlight.

Wait, starlight?

“Radheart,” I staggered forward through the snow, running along the path that Wingnut was cutting. My voice was husky and raspy from inhaling so much cold air and leaking so much snot out my nostrils. “Why are there stars up there? Where did the clouds go?”

“Well,” she gasped around her words. She’d been walking second behind whoever was cutting through the snow to provide direction, constantly calling out the leader whenever he or she would get off track. “That’s because the pegasi don’t rule here. This is far outside their stomping grounds and past mystical beasts of winter.”

The hardened plain of snow gleamed like an endless field of diamond under the open sky, kicking up what seemed to a radiant land to my eyes after traveling a day in darkness. No one part sparkled, but miles around glowed with a pale blue-white light. In the far distance, the moon perched among the peaks of a tall mountain range, looking down on the remains of a city. Skyscrapers stood faintly, some with flecks of light burning in their windows. Too little of it was clad in enough light to make out any fine details, but the important click in my mind was the knowledge it was there, within our grasp. So this is Denspur.

“Down there!” rasped Wingut. He was holding out a foreleg toward a small farmhouse perhaps a quarter-mile distant. It looked to have one floor, but was large enough to have several rooms. The walls were still somehow intact, promising a night free from the ravages of the wind. “We can warm up there and go into the town tomorrow!”

A cheer went up from our mottley crew, and Dizzy picked up his pace enough to start helping Wingnut push toward the structure. They left in a hurry, but the rest of us were not quite so keen to catch up. Sixteen hours of forced march through winds, rain, sleet, and a blizzard was apt to do that to even the most hardened soldier. And here we were, the soft city folk on the other side, somehow still standing. Pride stirred in my chest over my friends, my brother, and my love. Here they were, walking the last mile.

Ash shuddered along, lifting and letting each leg down slowly. She’d stopped speaking to everyone halfway through the trek, as if even spending words on everyone else was taxing. I missed her voice, and was looking forward to holding her until she would whisper soothingly to me once again. That would take food and a dry coat, but those could both be arranged.

Page had made a game with himself to walk twenty paces quickly, then rest until he had counted until twenty. He hadn’t fallen behind either, so I didn’t knock it. Stalemate was bringing up the rear, taking each step with the weary determination of a sleepwalker. He wasn’t far off, and I slunk through the snow toward the end of our journey, vague thoughts stirring in my mind about getting a fire going for them. They were solely eager to reach the end and receive the gifts of warmth and rest, and I agreed.

With the snow no longer falling into my eyes, only the frosty air hung barren between them and the broken down building. The farmhouse looked like something out of an old western with too much winter. An old porch gave welcome to the empty tundra, leading up to a thick wooden front door, now pushed aside to reveal the darkness of an empty house. The windows had been covered with plywood, forcibly shut against the unearthly winter outside.

Time had bleached the few sections of the outer walls not covered in snow white, and worn away at the wood. Only a few shingles were missing from the roof, and the places they failed to cover were shod in a dark resin. Either magic, or some really impressive construction and materials had kept this place together for the time it had weathered the storm.

A loud crack shook the snow from the corners where the planks ran together. It wasn’t until a scream and yelling rent the air that I realized the noise belonged to a gunshot.

Yelling through the mass of mucus in my throat, I charged forward, hooves pounding the ancient wooden floor. Somewhere in the middle of that stride the mouth-grip of my carbine found my teeth, and I found the sights in front of my eyes. The dark living room of the farmhouse had nothing but a stone fireplace, and two halls branching off of it; light was streaming out of the one to my right. Halfway down that hall, something rounded the corner faster than my eyes could follow, and kicked me out of the way on its path to the front door.

“Demon!”

Pain shot like lightning down my underbelly. I didn’t so much fall as impact the wall, and proceeded to slide down the rotting wood, filling my coat, bags, and blanket with splinters. At a slightly slower pace, a second creature darted around the corner, following the second. Black and white legs were just visible under a thick black winter coat. He disappeared into the living room as I finally came to rest on the floor.

Inhaling to call out hurt too much, and my legs didn’t want to uncurl. Ash!

Two ponies were choking and gasping in pain in the other room, and Dizzy was yelling. At the top of his lungs he was belting out something that didn’t quite register in my brain. I was too busy focusing every thought into trying to force air against the fire where my lungs should have been. Breathefuckingdamnme!

Somepony was scooping me up, and yelling my name in my ear. Why couldn’t I do this myself? There were two ponies ahead that needed help, and three behind that were probably fighting for their lives right now. I blinked the tears out of my eyes, drawing a ragged breath and coughing as Wingnut held me up and let my legs stretch out again.

“Sage, what happened to you?!”

I hacked and a stream of phlegm and blood dripped past my teeth onto the floor. Fire ran up my belly and ribs, but I could breath now.

“Ash…”

“They’re ok and in the living room’ two zebras just ran right past them out the door!”

He let me go, and the pain coursed again, causing a new coughing fit, stealing precious seconds with each drop of blood that ran past my teeth to splash on the floorboards. When that had also passed, I staggered forward, Wingnut still ready to catch me if I fell again.

Around the corner lay the remains of the kitchen. There was still one zebra there, clad in the same garb as his companions save for the hole running through the middle of the cloak. Red oozed out of him onto the floor while he stared blankly into a small cookfire burning atop a slab of stone. An iron cookpot boiled with the smell of soup above the flames. Beside the fire lay a stack of firewood about as long as my foreleg and half as deep.

Dizzy sat on the floor next to Radheart, desperately pressing his blankets against her bullet wound and sobbing. He’d torn his pack off to get them, and his rifle lay discarded on the floor. Her pink coat had been stained a deep crimson all across her underside, but the last vestiges of light flickered in her eyes. She had one hoof around his neck, and was whispering into his ear. Those words didn’t seem to be doing much to soothe him.

“Stalemate get in here now!” What should have been a thunderous demand was barely a yell, and my lungs ached for the effort of trying.

Radheart looked up at me, a sad smile on her face. “Those don’t fix heart wounds.” She turned back to Dizzy, her head dropping onto his shoulder.

She lay still, and Dizzy broke down, letting go of the towel to take her in his stained forelegs. Nuzzling against her head, he wept into her coat as her blood stained the gray of his face and neck. Stalemate stumbled into the room, followed by Page and Ash. Everything froze, save for my friend holding his dead mare and the crackling of the flames.

It took us the better part of an hour to get Dizzy to let go of Radheart. He never said anything, just held her and cried. I couldn’t remember him ever crying in the years we’d known each other. Once we got him to let go I had Ash take him to somewhere not here. We took all of the gear off her now cold body, trying our best to wash the blood off.

It didn’t take a genius to figure out how she died. The zebras who had ambushed us only had two hatchets and a spade, and Dizzy was alone in the room with Radheart. Maybe one day I’d ask him about it, but tonight was not the time. Not now of all times. Now it was my turn. I closed my eyes and tried my best not to show anything to Dizzy that he didn’t need to think about.

“All of you, leave this room, close the door.”

“Why?” asked Page, content by the cookfire.

“You know well, and none of you should have to do this. Take the rest of the wood, and the soup, go start a fire in the living room fireplace and eat. I’ll be out soon.”

Wingnut, Stalemate, and Page all look up, brows furrowed. They knew what I was about to do, and why I needed to do it. Didn’t help them accept it at all. Once they were out of the room, and I heard the door lock shut, I dug through Radheart’s pack to find a knife. There was most a of a field surgical kit in there. I didn’t know most of the tools in it, but she did have a bonesaw in addition to a few knives of various sizes. Fucking perfect.

There was no way I was going to like doing any of this.

She lay on the floor next to the fire, her coat all pink again, but darker in some places. Purple mane splayed around her neck, still soaked from the walk through the storm. Memories came flooding back of arguments we’d had, of her taking care of my friends, of her defending us, the strangers, from harm. She was my friend’s ‘lover’ in some form. Somepony had thankfully closed her eyes.

The pipbuck casing the lower part of her left foreleg appeared to be nothing more than a gray metal tube with some buttons and a screen, now blank. Memories of the day told me it was far more than just a hunk of metal. On the lower side it didn’t quite come down to her hoof. After a few moments of contemplating the deed, I stuck a foreleg under her, and rolled her onto her stomach, propping that leg out so it lay almost flat onto the floorboards.

I bit down on the grip of the bonesaw.

Resting atop her leg beside the hoof-side of her pipbuck, I held down her leg with mine. Every instinct screamed to close my eyes, but I’d need to see what I was doing. Blinking tightly, scrunching my lids closed over my eyes just once was all the respite I gave myself before pushing down and forward.

The flesh gave, quickly. It was cool now, but not yet dried or hard, and the saw quickly cut down to the leg bones underneath. Thin driblets of blood oozed from the capillaries under her skin, but no great volume gushed to the floor. It was already there. The smell was no different than the rest of the blood in room, confusing the part of me that expected something evil, some stench to remind me beyond my already assured state that she was indeed dead.

Drawing the saw back caused every last tooth to bounce over the bone and forcing me to tighten my grip on the handle. The next slide forward came with far more resistance and a slight grinding noise as the steel wore through the bone. The next one fell into the groove, and after that I could just shove the saw back and forth, trying to pretend I was cutting down a tree, complete with the tang of pine to wash away the cold metallic taste of blood.

At some point while I was off in that imaginary world Radheart’s leg bone gave way, and the saw slipped through the flesh on the otherside. My face slipped forward with it, rubbing my cheek into her pipbuck. The end of her leg fell clean off, and I moved the saw up to the other side.

When it too came free, I was left with a singular section of bone wrapped in flesh and skin encased in the pipbuck. Spitting out the bonesaw, I reached for the largest knife.

After twenty minutes of poking, slicing, scooping, and crying I was done. Radheart’s pipbuck was in my hooves, and my bloody spittle was all over the grip of her bonesaw and knives. How poetic. Now who do we give it to? I threw that thought out of my head as soon as I could. Not something to be taken lightly. I carefully wrapped her body up in the blankets she had worn, placing the bits of her leg beside her.

I remembered being hungry when I first ran into the farmhouse. Ravenous, ready to eat anything, even grass if I could find it. Now, I wanted nothing more than to sleep. Every muscle in my legs told me to lay down, and every point on my neck implored me to bow it. There was one more thing I had to do before I rested. I didn’t deserve to sleep until she did.

“Seth and Sawyer, I need you two.” At my call they started down the hallway. “We need to bury her.” They both just sort of looked at me as a way of saying they understood. We carried her out to a tree a few dozen yards from the farmhouse, and began to clear away the snow. In the distance the storm raged on as if nothing had happened that night.

“Should we get Dizzy for this?” Wingnut looked nervously back over his shoulder, as if he wanted to get our friend now.

I answered slowly, too spent to retort. “No, he wouldn’t want to see this, we can show him after we are done.”

It must have been close to sunrise by the time we had the grave completed. Digging out the snow had been a chore, and parting the hard ground had been almost impossible. If it hadn’t been for the spade the zebras left, we would have never been able to bury her.

When Ash brought Dizzy to Radheart’s grave, he looked practically dead. His eyes were hollow and bloodshot, probably from getting about as much sleep as I had on top of the tears. With each step his head drooped lower, until his nose dragged in the snow along with his wingtips. Radheart’s blood had dried to his coat, cracking in places as he shambled forward. When Ash stopped, so too did he by her side.

At the graveside he simply fell onto his rump, staring with his hollow eyes at the pile of loose dirt. Ash tried to hug him, but he just sat there, as if he and that grave were the only things in the entire world.

“Can you just leave me here alone for a bit?” His voice was hoarse, and broken. His eyes were still locked on the pile of dirt.

If I didn’t say something, we would all collapse. This was a time I had to be strong for all of them. I couldn’t say anything other than yes, but it had to come with direction. “We will be down in the farmhouse if you need us. We’ll stay here a night, and catch up on sleep.”

I looked around and headed back down the little hill, Ash, Wingnut, Page, and Stalemate all followed suit. I wanted to stay and comfort him, but I was tired and frozen. It had been a whole day awake, most of it fighting through the storm. Right when warmth had become an option, I was right back outside, digging a grave for a corpse I’d desecrated. I needed food, I needed warmth, and I needed a hug. For lack of anything else, I wanted to curl up and let Ash hold me while I cried.

Once back inside, by the warmth of the fire I could see all of our gear. Somepony had left out a tin of something, which I didn’t stop to identify before tipping it up and shoving it in my mouth. As I chewed, Wingut stared at his pack as if it were completely foreign.

“My pistol is missing.” He was rifling through the contents, dumping them out on the floor one by one.

“Are you sure it’s not just at the bottom of your pa-”

A crack rang through the house for a second time.

END OF BOOK ONE

Sky Sage: Level Four
NO! NOT NOW! G-- damnit! FUCK!

Perk: Command Presence
You’re the stallion, the big guy, head honcho, and the boss...or at least everyone around you sees you that way.
+10 to speech, unique dialogue options with specific NPC’s.

Quest Perk: Electrical Equine Engineer
It’s dangerous to stick your tongue into a live circuit, but you’ve gotta do what it takes to make things work. You have gained intuition on how electronics on all scales work in this new world -- and your ass tattoo.
+5 to Science, +5 to Energy Weapons

Adonicus: Level Four
A fitting end, this is how it should be.

Perk: Heart Broken
You lost the pony that you loved, welcome to the wasteland. Until you get over it you suffer -2 to all SPECIAL stats

Quest Perk: Jury Rigging
You can fix just about anything, with just about anything else. Fix a battle saddle with guts from a robot, fix a laser rifle with a pistol, keep that vertibuck flying with nothing but a roll of duct tape and some spare change. How does it work? Nopony knows, nopony except for you.
Repair any item with any similar item.

Ashen Shield: Level Three (50% to next level)
I guess it’s his time to be broken...

Stalemate: Level Four
Guess that makes me the doctor now.

Perk: Spell Learned: Healing Potion
Well as much as it’s a waste of whiskey, hopefully these things will be useful to heal somebody at some point on down the line.
Can make healing potions given the raw ingredients

Page Gemwright: Level Three (50% to next level)
Well, at least there’s fire and food. Ooooh. Fire.

Wingnut: Level Three
Roadtrips are a lot easier with friends along for the ride...

Author's Note

So here we are a month late, but it's done! Book One is finished, and Book Two: A Path Chosen will be out in a month.

Two new songs in one chapter, hope they added to the mood of the story. How did having several perspectives feel? Please take a minute and leave us your thoughts, we really appreciate them!