And all of 9gag shall bear witness to his maymays
"Dis b da gud shid" Said Chris xXxcampurbluntkillaxXx as he smoked some sweet weed. With each puff, he felt he came closer to reaching euphoria, and being mentally cleansed of all the foolishness of religion. He tipped his Hello Kitty fedora to that thought, leaving a trace of nacho cheese dorito dust where his fingers made contact with his fedora. He was in the middle of his daily ritual of posting beautiful memes on 9gag and reddit, his two favorite sites in the world.
Suddenly, a lump formed in his underwear and his virgin senses began to tingle; he needed to kill some scrubs on the new Call of Duty game. He loaded the disc into his Xbox and began to play a team deathmatch. He immediately got killed by a guy and he began to write a hate message to him. "oi fegget, u jst stoped muh 20 kill strek. ur mum is a big fag who sucks cock evry day."
He sighed from moderate Mountain Dew withdrawal and sent the message, the moment he did, his room was engulfed in a bright flash of light; the light, Eric knew, meant someone had entered his domain and the stink and garbage piled up in there began to escape towards freedom. He even saw his bag of doritos from five days ago grow legs and run away.
"Chris," said her mother, the only female he has and probably will ever see. "Take the garbage out." She finished, placing her hands on her hips like a sassy black woman.
"GET OUT MY ROOM MOM!!!" Replied xXxcampurbluntkillaxXx, throwing a can of Mountain Dew at the door, missing his mom completely due to the fact he had yet to adapt his quick scoping skills to real life, therefor making his aim as bad as a noob.
