I sit atop a hill in the middle of the night. Rain falls over me and matts down my mane and tail, small droplets of water streaking down my body. despite the cold of the rain, there is a warmth up against my back. Looking down and too my left I see a hoof resting atop mine. I can’t help but smile.
“I love you…” I say softly, thunder booming overhead. I feel her nod in response. Her silence is unbearable, but understandable.
“Do you... love me?” I ask, earning a shrug of her shoulders. It makes sense, I guess. With a sigh, I lower my gaze from the sky to the ground.
“Will I ever see you again?” I ask quietly, trying to keep the tremble out of my voice. Another shrug is her only response.
“I see… Do you remember how we met?” I ask, earning a nod from her. I smile softly. “I hope I get to see you again someday...”
There is a long silence that seems to last forever. I sigh as she shifts slightly, the back of her head tilting to rest against my neck. Several moments later, she leans forward. the warmth recedes, but only slightly.
Looking down at my hoof, I see the one atop mine has changed color. I frown and close my eyes. Of course…
“I’m sorry…” I whisper quietly, earning a shake of her head. I start to look over my shoulder but stop.
“I love you. I…” Her hoof pressed down harder on mine, silencing me. I wince slightly, knowing I deserve this. “...I regret nothing more than what I did to you…” I earn another nod in response.
“If I could, I’d take it all back…”
A nod.
“I’d rewind time and keep myself from doing it.”
No response.
“I’d do anything… absolutely anything to make it right.”
A shake of her head. I sigh heavily. there is nothing I can do to fix any of this. I know it and she knows it. Its useless to think otherwise and yet I do so anyways.
“I’m begging you, at least let me try.” I say, causing her to shake her head harder. I slowly try to wrap my hoof around hers, but she forces my hoof down again.
“I can’t keep this up… do you know that?” I say, causing her to nod slowly. I sigh, breaths starting to become unstable along with my voice. Several moments pass in silence as thunder booms overhead.
“I just… I wish so much that I wasn’t so alone.” I mutter, tears mingling with the rain as I begin to cry silently. She shrugs, hoof relaxing and rubbing mine gently.
“...Do you still care…:?” I whisper, barely able to speak. She nods slowly. I can’t help but smile ever so gently at that.
“Is there a chance we can ever be together…?” Sadly and slowly, she shakes her head. I feel it in my heart that she is being honest. I relinquished my right to be with her after what I did…
“Can you ever forgive me for what I’ve done?” I ask, earning a shrug in response. I suppose it’s what I deserve…
I knew what I did. It hurt her so much… “Just know that I will forever regret what I’ve done…” She rubs my hoof some more, trying to comfort me. I feel the urge to turn around again, but I refuse.
“Do you think I can find somepony else?” I feel her shrug again. I nod in response.
“It won’t be easy, will it?” She shakes her head, and I look back up at the sky. the clouds are slowly starting to part, revealing a bright full moon, seeming to shine a spotlight directly on me.
“So… what am I supposed to do?” I ask softly, earning another shrug from her.
“Can I… Can I just say something? One last thing?” I ask as she retracts her hoof. I feel her head tilt, likely in curiosity.
“I will find a way to make things right. I promise. I swear on my life. Somehow, someway… one day, I will make this right.” There is a long pause before I feel her shake her head slowly. I shudder before I begin to openly sob. She slowly gets up and the warmth leaves my back. It is replaced moments later as I feel her forelegs wrap around me from behind in a tight hug.
I reach up one of my own hooves and rest in on her left foreleg, cherishing what is likely to be our final embrace. We remain still for a long while, with me crying my eyes out and her trying to keep me comforted, even in her silence. She had done so many times in the past, and now she did it again. Slowly, I stop crying. She pulls away slightly and my hoof on her foreleg wraps around it, begging her to stay. After several moments, she rubs my shoulder calmingly, and slowly and reluctantly… I let go. As she slowly retracted, I couldn’t help it. I glanced over my shoulder to look at her.
There was nopony there. The clouds are slowly starting to return to their place in front of the moon. A loud crack of thunder sounds and the rain begins to fall once more. My ears flatten against my head and I sigh, choking down another sob.
“Alright… I understand…” I say, laying down against the grass. The rain falling around and on me is almost comforting. It’s gentle and calming, almost like a shower of sorts. I look up as the last of the moon’s light is shrouded out by the black clouds, shrouding me in darkness. Soon, I can’t see anything. I feel like my emotions are being washed away. Eventually, I am empty. I look up into that eternal darkness above my head, a single word echoing on for a long time as it leaves my mouth.
“Goodbye…”
