Rain and Regret

by SuperWabbit

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Dark, Sad
Length: 4207

Dash, and all her friends, hate her for what she did. Time to pack the bags and make a new life.

Friends usually forgive each other for accidents, but for things that cause other friends so much pain, its a little bit more complicated then that. Rainbow dash messes up terribly, and cant stand the guilt and regret. She leaves Ponyville ready to make her new life. On the way, an old friend teaches her a valuable lesson..

Teen for mature language and a something bloody :fluttercry:

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-12-18 11:40:05 UTC

Rain and Regret

Rainbow has always been a beloved member of the Ponyville community. She has always been a show off, attempting amazing stunts and winning several competitions. Everyone loves Rainbow Dash. She has made countless mistakes, but she has always never meant them. People forgive her, because they know it was all an accident. But when you do something that will damage a pony for years changing how they see you, its probably a little bit more complicated then asking for an apology.

"Hey, Fluttershy." Rainbow Dash was invited to stay at Flutters house tonight and have a sleepover. Rainbow Dash never really enjoyed these, but because her best friend wanted to, she pretty much had to return the favour of all the other countless things she has  done for her.

"H..hey, Rainbow Dash. I'm sorry for the mess, Angel was a naughty bunny and had a temper tantrum, and messed up the things I cleaned for you. I hope that's all right with you.." Fluttershy glanced over to the corner of the room where Angel was forced to sit for being a bad bunny. Fluttershy always over did things in the mind of Rainbow Dash. She should really learn to relax and not be such a worry-wart. The house looked beautiful, the only thing that was 'messy' was two books that landed on the floor from Angel knocking them over.

"Don't worry about it, you remember how messy my house in the sky is. This spotless compared to my house." Rainbow dash reassured Fluttershy, hearing a sigh of relief. Saying things like that always tended to calm her down a lot. "What's that your cooking? Smells delicious! You really don't need to cook something like that for me.." Rainbow didn't want her going through all the effort of doing such good things for her.

"Its, um, just a little bit of soup. I put the stuff you like in it, like tomato, the mixed herbs seasoning and those noodles you love."

Rainbow once again, felt bad of her putting through all the effort. "The Nelly Noodles String noodles? Why are you doing all of this for me? You really can just make something super simple that takes 10 seconds flat to make.

"Well, I am the element of kindness. I want the best for my friends dashie, well.. I would like the best. Your my best friend and without you I would have a different cutie mark, a different house and I would have less then half the friends that I do now." Fluttershy had a blush on her face. It seemed that she noticed it, instantly flicking her pink mane over her face and turning around, going back to tending on the soup.

"Well, how was your tricks today? I saw you in the distance doing flips when I was in the market buying food for my animals." How could she see me? I was past Canterlot, so I would have appeared as the smallest speck, but she managed to see me.

"I never knew you had such good eyes, how could you spot me from so far away?"

"Maybe the stare made my eyes see further." We both laughed a little bit at that remark. Maybe that is possible, her stare makes her eyes about to pop out of her skull, so could that be like zooming in? Fluttershy taste tested the soup, which smelled magnificent, and served it into two bowls for us. I turned around to see how Angel was going, but I noticed he was missing from his corner.

"Um, Flutter, isn't Angel meant to be in that corner because he was misbehaving and stuff?" Maybe he was planning on throwing a bucket of something on my face. He appeared to really hate Fluttershy's friends, but surely he would not do it when she is around.

Fluttershy appeared shocked to know he was not there. "Oh no angel, where are you? Are your little whiskers in trouble? Or are you in trouble for leaving your spot when I didn't say so? Please angel, come out if your here." Fluttershy was walking in circles scanning across the room like a crazy robot. She seemed very worried for her bunny, it would be horrible for something to happen to him. "Well, ill be back in a minute Rainbow, I need to find this little trouble maker." By hearing this, Rainbow thought she meant business, and might possibly use the stare tonight..

The soup Fluttershy made for me tasted scrumptious, and I was probably eating it a little too quickly. After one minute, the massive bowl she had given to me was already empty, and I was tempted to steal a little bit out of her bowl. Of course though, I'm loyal! Great friends don't steal from others. She is too kind for even giving me any. It seemed like she would be gone for quite awhile, as now she was searching around outside. I decided I will do something in return for Fluttershy, as she was too generous for me. Rainbow walked into the kitchen, looking at what things Fluttershy had. Possibly a nice desert would be great for her, but what? She had a large amount of lettuce, chocolate syrup, carrots, cookies, whipped cream and milk. I remember a recipe for a drink using these. It involved a drink with broken up cookies at the top with chocolate syrup mixed through with a little bit of whipped cream, and carrots on the side. The drink was extremely sweet, but I think she would love it.

I found a glass cup inside one of her kitchen draws, so put that on the bench. Okay, I have glass, so.. I need to pour the milk into the glass. Easy as a rainboom! I struggled to lift up the milk container, but managed to pour the milk in without any landing on the wooden bench in-front of me. Awesome, now, I think it was one tea spoon of chocolate syrup, as well a the whipped cream. I searched around the entire room searching for a spoon. Didn't she have any? I gave up after around 30 seconds, and decided to estimate how much I was putting into the drink. It turned out a weird colour, light grey looking thickish. Despite that, knowing what's in it who wouldn't want to eat it? Now, the cookies. I grabbed 1 cookie since they were pretty large, slightly larger then the base of my hoof, and cracked it over the top of the glass into small pieces. This looked really nice, but to make sure all the flavours were mixed perfectly, I saw a piece of bamboo in the corner of the room, washed it off and used it for stirring. This looked really nice. And now the last step, cutting the carrot into even pieces. I found a knife in the far end of the kitchen. On the front of it, a note said 'Touch and you get the stare.' Most likely a warning for angel. I took out the extremely sharp knife and began to cut into the carrots. I struggled as I never really had to do these things, instead I would just buy my own food, since my family was rich and I took the inheritance money after my parents died. That's the reason I had a massive mansion in the clouds. Pretty big waste of money, since I rarely go to Cloudsdale these days. My leg slipped on the hard floor and made me stumble on top of the bench. The knife slid out of my hooves, but I quickly dodged out of the way to avoid me getting stabbed. I may have wished I didn't move.

There, on the ground, lay a Bunny that had just been stabbed by a sharp knife covered in carrots. It seemed to have fallen into his chest, probably piercing his heart and killing him. Blood started spreading over his body. Shit. What am I going to do? Fluttershy will hate me forever, people will always think of me in a different way! Instead of 'Rainbow Dash, the best flyer in Equestria,' they will think 'Rainbow dash, the animal murderer.' For the past 10 minutes, Fluttershy had been searching for him, she will go absolutely crazy knowing I just killed him! She was worrying enough not knowing where he was. Why did I need to try be kind.. I'm not good at being kind! What should I do? If I lie, she would probably be depressed for ages. And if she found out after I lied, she would lose my trust, and like Pinkie Pie always says, I will lose her forever. If I tell her the truth, how will she react? She probably will be crying and scream at me to stay away from her, and she will avoid me for ages. If I run away, she will know I did it and probably try get me arrested or something. I am screwed, no matter what. It.. might be best just to tell her the truth, say its all an accident. That usually works.. but what will she be like knowing her life long friend has just died by me?

"Rainbow.. *sniff*, where is angel?"

Yep, I'm screwed.

"Well, there.. may have been an accident." My tone made her more scared, I could not sound calm and instead sounded like I was about to cry with guilt.

"What.."

"HE IS DEAD! ITS ALL MY FAULT! I was trying to be kind for you by making desert, and once I was on the final step, I had to cut carrots. I fell over and the knife fell into him! I didn't know he was there, I swear! Please don't kill me!" This can't have worked. No way.

"R..rain..Rainbow." Fluttershy stuttered.

"Yes?" I was now crying aswell, probably more then her. She was doing amazing to hold in her tears.

"Leave, now. I need to be alone, especially without an animal murderer!" She pushed into me, attempting to force me out the door. She was a lot weaker, so she got me no where. With all this guilt, ruining her day and probably next few years since how emotional she was, the best thing I could do was leave. I turned around about to try apologize again, but she slammed the door in my face. There goes my best friend. The one that we have done so many things together, helped each other in our times of need. Now, this relationship is fucked.

I awoke back in a random cloud floating nearby to Twilights library. I had tear stains all across my face, I just lost the person who mattered the most to me. And I don't know how all my other friends will react when they found out what I did. Why don't I just care about no one? That way, I'm sure to make no mistakes ruining any ponies life. That way, I wont ever be to blame! No, that wont work. Then no one will like be because I'm a selfish prick..

"Rainbow." A familiar, important voice disturbed my weeping. I really didn't want to be interrupted at this moment, I was too busy hating myself. I raised my head to see a disappointed Twilight Sparkle. Dammit, why did I take a cloud above her house? Of course she would just fly up and annoy me.

"We know that you killed Angel. It all sounds like an accident, but that is horrible. If you ruined Fluttershy, we probably wont be talking much for a while. We need to comfort that poor soul. Angels funeral is this afternoon  in her house, it will be raining then, so bring a jacket. See you there." She flew back towards Fluttershys house in the distance.

And now twilight hates me as well.. Why is my life completely ruined. I wonder how my other friends will think of me.. Its just not fair. It was all an accident! Why cant Twilight and Fluttershy just forgive me. All I wanted to do, was do something nice for her, and ended up ruining her and my life. No, I cant live here any more, not with this guilt and regret. Good bye Ponyville, I know you wont miss me.

"Ofcourse, that selfish pony doesn't even bother to turn up on the funeral of the creature she killed." Rarity seemed to be disgusted at me, but I had a reason. I had actually not left yet, instead I was watching from a distance without them not knowing. While they were undercover trees to stop them getting wet, I was out in the rain, suffering from all this regret.

"Oh well, let's just continue without her. We don't need to be her friends any more, its not like she cares about Fluttershy." Twilights comment.. hurt. Rainbow felt like she had just been brutally murdered from the inside, but still living to suffer even more.

Not.. my friends any more. How could they.. I'm an element of harmony, but they are just throwing me away like trash. Well, goodbye Ponyville. I don't deserve a place that is as good as you, I'm only good enough to be a lost peasant, wondering around the lands sheltering where I go. Maybe I could just go to a new city or town.. but then I wouldn't be able to stop thinking about my old friends. The ones I went through so much with. I turned away from the place I called home, and went onwards to find my new home.

I have been flying and walking for an hour, while the night was pitch black and bucketing down rain. This was my new life, flying around searching for a reason not to hate myself. If there was a reason, that is. A mouldy shack lay upon a hill, which seemed unused. Water did not ender inside except for several drops of water, so possibly I could take shelter here for the night. Luckily, there was a pile of hay in the corner of the room, so I could just sleep on top of there. As I fell onto the pile of straw, I instantly became super itchy. At least it was better then lying on the hard, cold ground. Sadly for me, normal clouds are unable to be stood on during storms. Tomorrow night ill get to me comfy again..

*Moo*

I awoke to several fat cows staring at me. Did they live here?

"Excuse me, but why are you lying in our breakfast?" For a cow, she had a very posh accent.

"*Sniff* Sorry.. I thought this shack was unused." Of-course it would have been a cows lunch room. They must have took shelter elsewhere during the storm, and came back here for breakfast when the rain stopped.

"That's all right, but would you kindly get the hay out of our hay?" She rammed into my wing pushing me off the hay. That cow was so considerate for me, not even asking why I was here, just probably assuming that I was a no good trespasser. My right wing had a sharp pain, which will probably stop me from flying for several hours, if I'm lucky. I limped attempting to fix up my wing, leaving the room. The clouds were still grey, so it will keep raining later today. Such a great thing to lift my spirits!

I had no Idea which direction I was currently heading. Think back, Rainbow. What would Twilight say. The sun rises in the east and sets in the west, work out north and south from there. She looked up, as it must be early in the morning, and could dimly see a light through the clouds in the distance. She appeared to be heading north, into the griffin kingdoms.  For the time I've travelled, I must be close to the border.

Time past walking for a while, and noticed a familiar face pulling an empty carriage. Big Macitosh must have been delivering that to a village on the border, on which I forgot the name of. I really didn't want to see anyone that is related to one of the people that now hates her.

"Heyy, Big Mac. What are you doing here? Did you deliver a big crate all by yourself?" She all ready knew the answer, she was just attempting to make him go away.

"Eeyup." The classic, Big Mac answer, the exact answer on which Rainbow knew she would hear.

"Well, you better go back to Sweet Apple Acres and not tell Applejack that you saw me here. I'll Catch you later!" Rainbow dash explained quickly, soon to dash away. She never wanted to talk to anyone, just be left alone. Big Mac will probably mention that I was here though, he always tells his sister everything, usually with the least words possible.

The day was pretty basic : Flying when my wing healed itself, going to the toilet behind trees, trying to find food that is not poisonousness. Luckily, I discovered a lone apple tree, and happily devoured several of them. Half way through the day, I entered the griffin kingdom. The place was a lot less green then back in Equestria, water seemed to be a lot less common and the landscape was heaps more vertical. I spotted a cave on the top of a large, orange cliff and flew up to it. To my suprise, my long lost Frien-nemy was there.

"Well, I guess you decided to go back to being cool. About time, I was wondering how long you would last with those dweebs." Gilda, seemed to be a lot bigger then before. Not in height, but she seemed to be over exercising. Looking at how bulk she was now, you would think she would struggle to fly in the air at all.

"I didn't want to leave them, they wanted me to leave." I lowered my head, giving the hint that I was depressed. Gilda seemed a little shock, thinking I could make friends where ever I went, and keep them until the end.

"What happened, did you punch that annoying bitch, Pinkie was it? Or did you burn down that annoying chicks library? That, would be totally cool if you did." Gilda had obviously not changed on bit in the last four years without seeing her.

"Pinkie is fine.. Twilight hates me and she's a princess now.. Instead I killed Fluttershy's pet and now they all hate me. I left because I could not stand the guilt and regret."

"Hmm, was Fluttershy that innocent little prick? I scared her good, she ran off like a baby. Oh she must hate you for killing her pet."

"Thanks for the encouragements."

"You're welcome."

Outside of the cave, the rain stormed on twice as much as the previous day. In this weather, I would not be able to fly, slamming into the sharp rocks on which this kingdom consists with. I really wanted to leave this annoying Griffin because the last time we caught up, but I was now stuck in here for the time being. Her den was suprisingly well decorated, she actually had a good taste. She constructed the floor of the cave to be a dark type of wood with a really rustic feel. Also, there were several pillars of cobblestone holding up the roof, no books to be seen, a fancy bed, kitchen and trophy case. I never knew she had won so many events. Either that, or she stole them from her competitors which was more likely. Or, she could have won several new competitions over the last new years, seeing how buff she was now.

"How, did you get so massive?" I just had to ask, she looked really good.

"Oh its nothing much, 500 wing ups, 200 push ups, 100 sit ups, 100 laps of this mountain while flying, sprinting for 10 minutes without stopping. And that's all in a day. Everyday."

"Well, you're killing yourself then. No one can live through that much brutal training." Its amazing she is living, her heart must be in terrible condition.

"Of course ponies would think that, but barely any understand that griffins can do a lot more then ponies can. I usually do more then that, but average days I don't."

"Well I never wanted to even see you, I wanted to be alone and think." Why did I need to stumble along the cave of hers? Out of how many caves and houses that are probably in this kingdom.

"That's fine by me, I never really wanted to see your sorry ass again after how you humiliated me. But you know what's amazing? I have friends now! I know, sounds a little bit crazy. 'Bitchy Gilda actually learns how to make friends, and understands them.'" Why would anyone want to be her friend? I'm such a moron for ever becoming her friend back in flight school. I always thought that she was cool like me and better then everyone else, but she is more of a show-off than me! And any more than me, is too much.

"Look, over these three and so years, I moved back to the griffin kingdom. I got a job as a police. I act a lot more mature in this job so I don't get fired and crap, and while doing so I've met a lot of good griffins I'm friends with. I accidently let a murderer out and the murderer murdered my friends family. They were pissed at me for a while, and they seem very depressed, but they eventually forgave me. They knew its an accident, which probably sounds the same as your shitty situation. And you, you seem like your turning yourself into shit fussing over the mistakes you made! You even left your home and friends over this, so they will feel bad what they did to you. Do you realise this?"

Gilda.. might have actually been helpful for once. I never considered what they would think if I left Ponyville, and I must have made them feel terrible aswell.

"You.. might be right." I managed to sound more like the confident, usual me.

"Ha, I know I'm right. There's no need for you to become such a whiny bitch over something you did which was obviously an accident."

"Yeah yeah, I get it. I was an idiot and didn't think my plan through."

"Well, does anyone know where you left to?" By her saying this, I remembered my encounter with Big Mac.

"Yeah, I saw one of my friends brother and he will probably say I was entering the Griffin Kingdom.."

"Well, if they have ever actually been your friends, they will come find you. If they don't, then why would you want to be with friends that didn't care about you?"

At that moment, twilight unexpectedly flew into the cave.

"Rainbow! Why did you run away like that! We were worried sick! Wait right here and don't run away again, I'm telling our friends I know where you are, they are just at the bottom of this cliff."

Gilda turned to face me and put on a smile. "Well, I guess it is worth being there friends because they obviously care about you." I just had to smile back, Gilda has become so much more helpful in the past few years.

Twilight warped herself and our friends into Gildas cave. The expressions shown upon their faces meant they did not think a long gone enemy would still be here. Fluttershy, seemed to be the least pleased.

"My lady, I hear you are now princess of equestria or some crap like that, anyway congratulations! Rainbow here flew into my cave and we had a talk awhile and I think I convinced her not to run off like that, you clearly care about her which she was scared of you not doing such."

"Um, thank you.. Gilda, was it?"

"Yes." Gilda was not amused, why can't people just remember her name without needing to think about it?

"Rainbow, what in the world were you runnin' off like that? Ah am sorry we all got you very sad, but really now, why would you wanna run away?" Applejack seemed more sorry for me than angry, so that was a good sign.

"Because I heard you all say you don't want to be my friends any more. Twilight said that about me when you were at the funeral. I was not there because I was seeing what you thought of me, and I was so ashamed of myself for causing Fluttershy that pain.

"W..Well, Rainbow.. Im sorry I shouted at you like that. I was so scared Angel is gone, I'm still so lost without him. *Sniff* Can you forgive me?"

"If you forgive me first." I managed to pull on a slight smile.

"Okay."

The next day and a half, we all walked back together to Ponyville, saying about all the 'I'm sorry' and the 'Do you forgive me.' I guess good friends need to learn to forgive.. even if it is hard to.