Treacle

Chapters

Sweet
Sticky
Coarse
Bitter
Tart
Golden

Sweet

aka The only chapter with sex in it. Enjoy!

In the dead of night, a solitary figure wiped languidly away at the surface of the sales counter of Sugarcube Corner. For a stallion as lanky as Carrot Cake, reach was never exactly a problem for these kinds of cleanings, which made the task more mind-numbing than taxing. It was the last bit of tidying up before he could finally end his day, and he alone worked under that single lightbulb that provided the sole illumination for the ground floor and gave his yellow coat an added saturation. Almost all of Ponyville was asleep, his dear wife and children included. Always important for the stallion of the house to do his extra bit of work so those he cares for can rest easier. It also gives a stallion time to think, to reflect. Particularly on the trappings that come with a stable, though predictable life. Those especially warranted a sigh from his dull muzzle.

His discontented reverie was disrupted at the ringing of the bell atop the shop door, which he left unlocked for the one missing occupant of the Cake household. Like some puffy faerie, the premiere party pony that was Pinkie Pie trotted in, though a bit stiltedly. Her poofy mane and tail seemed messier than normal, and her eyes blinked out of sync with one another, but she still moved as lightly as ever and carried that same warm, if somewhat tired-looking smile. No doubt she had herself a good time, Carrot thought as his favorite employee and lounger made her way to him.

In a few exaggerated steps she made it to the counter and planted her forelimbs on the freshly-wiped top. “Heeeello, there, Mr. Cake.” That same chipper tone, if a little slurred.

“Hey there, Pinkie Pie,” he greeted back. “Did you have fun?”

“Oh boy you betcha!” Her face brightened up relative to her volume, which Carrot tried to adjust with a gesturing of his hooves. “Oops, sorry. But yeah, it was great. Berry had a lot of fun, and so did everypony else there. So many games, and dancing, and lots of things to eat and drink as well! Although most of the drinks Applejack brought, but it suuure was good, especially watching her and Rainbow Dash go at it like they usually do when cider is involved.”

“Yeah, I can see you’ve helped yourself to a good bit of it yourself.” This elicited a giggle from the inebriated pony.

“Oh you know me, Mr. Cake: I just can’t get enough fun.” She moved her head around her shoulders before looking back at him. “So staying up cleaning shop?”

“Yeah, but just a minor spic and span,” he answered. “Didn’t feel like sleeping, so figured I’d burn some of that energy by doing a little extra sprucing.”

“Oh my gosh, I don’t feel like sleeping too! Maybe that party buzz is still going strong for me, although it ended like twenty minutes ago. Wanna maybe party it out so it goes away quicker?”

“No thanks, Pinkie. Not really in the mood for partying,” he said with the fatherly voice he developed in the years talking to his overly enthusiastic employee.

“Ohhh, really?” she said in her bubbly tone of disappointment. “It doesn’t have to be a loud party or one that really involves moving around. We could just play cards or tell stories or something simple like that. You know, cuz everyone’s asleep and all, wink wink, heehee.”

“That’s nice of you to offer, but I can enjoy some quiet alone time, wiping things down and thinking to myself.”

“Thinking what kinds of things?” She stuck out her tongue with a silly grin.

“Just things, this and that.”

“What kind of ‘this and that’? Hee hee.”

“Nothing of any real concern to anypony, I assure you.”

It may have been the slight edge in his tone, or his choice of words, that dampened Pinkie’s merry mood and made her glazed eyes focus on her landlord. “Is something the matter, Mr. Cake?”

“Nothing to worry yourself over, Pinkie,” Carrot said as dismissively as possible. “Like I said, it’s no concern to anypony else but me.”

“But it’s something that’s bothering you. I can tell these things. It’s like a feelings radar, or my Pinkie Sense, only I have control over it. So why don’t you tell me? If it’s something embarrassing I won’t tell anypony.”

Before Carrot told her off in a firmer tone, he paused. He admitted that what was on his mind had been stewing for the past several weeks, and Pinkie was never the type to gossip someone’s personal affairs. It may put him at ease just to tell somepony, plus there was a chance she’d forget the conversation in the morning. His decision made, Carrot sighed softly and stopped his wiping.

“It’s not embarrassing, but it is frustrating.”

“What is it?”

Here goes nothing, he thought. “Things between me and Mrs. Cake haven’t… been going as nicely as I’d like.”

A quiet gasp from the party pony. “Oh no! Did you two get into a fight? Is she sick? Does it have something to do with the twins?”

“No no, none of that,” he assured her. “It’s just… well, it’s not as exciting between us as a couple.”

“How come?”

Ever so blunt, our dear Pinkie, he mentally remarked. “It’s a little tough to say, and maybe you wouldn’t understand it so much since you’re still fairly young and single.”

“Oh like… like she doesn’t, uhh… ‘satisfy’ you, or you don’t ‘satisfy’ her?”

Bluntness strikes again! “I don’t want to say this behind her back, but it’s more of…” You’ve already come this far, he reminded himself. “Her not… ‘satisfying’, me.”

“Oh my, that can be a problem. Has it been going on long?”

“Not very long, or I should say… a fair bit of time? I’m really not comfortable giving specifics.”

“Okay, I won’t push ya for more.”

“Don’t get me wrong: I love her with all my heart. She’s the most precious thing to me next to my children, but there are times I don’t feel like she appreciates me as much as I do her. Not just in… bedroom matters, but in being around me during the day and even when we talk. It’s nothing harsh or bitter on her part, it’s just… interacting with me has become more like a routine to her. Or at least that’s how it seems to me.”

“Uh-huh,” the mare bobbed her head in drunken attention.

“When we got married, we couldn’t get enough of each other. It seemed like a flame that wouldn’t go out. But years passed, we settled in, got a pair of kids, and it seems to have simmered way lower than what it once was.”

“Have you talked to her about this?”

“Haven’t thought about it, to be honest. Other things have been on my mind, and us not being… intimate, as of late, has made me feel a little more tense than usual. Besides, I’m not sure how to talk about it, or how she would take it.”

“It shouldn’t be bad if you just tell her. You’ve been together for, like, ever, so she should understand.”

“She could take it the wrong way, though,” Carrot said, with an inner worry creeping into his voice. “She might think that I’m bored with her, or that I don’t love her anymore. She looks and acts so content with the way things are that if I question it and say it’s no good, what would that say about her, or me for that matter? Like I’m not the dutiful husband who should be content with his lot in life, grateful that he has a wife who would give him kids and be with him for as long as we have been. These kinds of things are what’s bothering me even more, and just thinking about it more is giving me more stress. Stress she’d normally take care for me, but she hasn’t done it in so long that now she’s the one giving me the stress it’s just so, so frustrating!”

Carrot collected himself as he saw the concern forming in Pinkie’s gaze, and gave a cough. “I’m sorry. You didn’t need to hear all that.”

Pinkie’s face softened into a smile. “That’s alright, Mr. Cake.” She got up from her place at the counter and trotted around to the other side. “I’d be stressed too if I had all those things to think about without telling anypony. Good thing that I’m around, huh?”

“Yeah, it helps a bit.” Despite saying that, Carrot sighed and let his head hang low. “But I’m just afraid that I won’t be able to put things the way they used to be, or whether that’s a good idea, or if it’s even possible anymore. That, for this one thing, she might not listen.”

“Of course she has to listen.” Carrot’s eyes opened a bit more at the feel of a gentle hoof on his chin raising it up, causing him to look into a pair of deep, blue, caring eyes. “You’re the nicest, smartest stallion that I know. You’ve been helpful to me, my friends, and especially to Mrs. Cake and Pound and Pumpkin. Given that you’ve been with her for so long, why wouldn’t she hear you out?”

“I... I suppose you’re right.”

“I bet I’m right.” She giggled. “You just need a confidence boost: know how much you’re appreciated by everypony here.” Her eyes suddenly took on a devious tint. “And I have just the thing in mind.”

Without warning Pinkie closed the gap between her and Carrot’s muzzle and pressed her lips against his. His eyes shot open as he felt her wiggly tongue enter his mouth and get in contact with his teeth and tongue, making him get a taste Pinkie Pie. Despite the prevailing aroma of cider, there was an underlying flavor of sweetness, no doubt the result of regular consumption of candy and assorted baked goods. The kiss barely lasted a few seconds before Pinkie disconnected and pulled her head back, giving Carrot that same smile and a half-lidded look.

“P-Pinkie, what are you doi—”

“Shhh. Just accept the appreciation.”

He couldn’t get out another word before she kissed him again, only with more gusto. Her tongue went into full attack mode within his mouth, trying to get his tongue to wrangle with it and mix spit. The baker’s mind reeled over the abrupt turn of events, but the one thought that broke through was the notion to disengage from Pinkie. He did so, using his forehooves to push back the tipsy mare from his face.

“Pinkie, you’re drunk.”

“And you’re somepony who needs some special help. And I’m always there for a friend in need.”

For a third time Pinkie pressed herself against Carrot’s face. In his mind the lanky stallion was fumbling and yelling to do something to put an end to this before it continued. Push her away, make her stop, get her to bed. Anything to put some sense into the poor girl before the situation could get any worse.

Yet, he did nothing.

It may have been the frustrations he had been feeling, the want for intimacy in his life, the (supposed) sincerity in Pinkie’s words that made him give in and close his eyes, allowing himself to feel pleasure in that moment. The resistance in his mouth fell as Pinkie’s tongue resumed its passionate dance with his own, which he finally partook in. The mare came off sloppy, but there was so much enthusiasm in the tongue work that he steadily became overwhelmed, allowing himself to moan softly into her mouth, which she responded to with moans of her own.

Pinkie got more into it, pressing into Carrot and forcing him back onto his hindlegs until he had his back against the counter with his forelegs held back as added support. The heat and the passion was intoxicating; it may well have been years since he recalled getting so worked up just from a kiss. It only lasted a few moments more before Pinkie pulled back on her own, allowing both of them to catch their breaths. Carrot was in a haze, his face blushing and his body quivering from the loving to his mouth. Pinkie, on the other hoof, was blushing more out of growing lust, her eyes adopting a hungry look.

“Feeling appreciated?” she asked in a sultry tone.

“Y-Yeah…”

“That’s good.” With that she leaned up to lightly kiss his right cheek, and then the side of his neck, then the top of his collarbone. “You mentioned something about being stressed as well.”

Carrot could only groan breathlessly as the promiscuous mare peppered his body with light pecks, trailing down his exposed barrel, waist, and then stopping above the crotch as she got down on her knees. The pause in her ministrations allowed Carrot to look down and see to his bewilderment what she was looking at. The enamored kiss and the little ones on his body had aroused his stallionhood out of its sheath, so that its mottled semi-hardness was on full display to the poofy-maned filly. She looked at it curiously with a smile, leaning in to take a full whiff of his maleness. The precum that had just formed at the tip of the flat head began to trickle over such an act.

“Yep, plenty of tension there,” she said with a giggle while bringing up a forehoof to rub at the leathery skin. Feeling her soft touch on his sensitive, long-neglected member made Carrot rear back from more sensual pleasure, further compounded as Pinkie gave delicate licks to the flare and rivulets of pre that covered it. Yet despite his dick getting harder from the attentions of a cute and shockingly-skilled mare, some semblance of rationality managed to push through the lust as he tried to formulate some words.

“P-Pinkie…” His desperate chance at protest ended abruptly as Pinkie Pie took the entirety of his shaft deep into her smiling mouth. The sensation of his whole length becoming wrapped in wet, velvety goodness made the stallion arch his back and immediately give off a moan, which encouraged the party pony below to start bobbing her muzzle along her throbbing prize. In little time she started caressing his length with her tongue, further sending the stallion into unmitigated rapture.

A whirlwind of emotions and thoughts went through Carrot’s head in a euphoric, troubling jumble. Pinkie Pie, a mare who had been living under his roof for several years. A fun-loving, innocent, trustworthy employee, who was practically like a daughter to him, kneeling on the floor sucking his cock behind the counter of his work place, which he founded alongside his loving wife, the bearer of his children, who also happened to be sleeping upstairs at that very moment.

Rather than kill his arousal, those thoughts only pushed him at a breakneck pace closer to release. Sweat formed on his forehead as he gave off a series of growing moans, while Pinkie gave off some undulations of her own to further spice up the pleasure. For a good minute and a half this carried on, Carrot and Pinkie lost in their own respective spheres of bliss. Eventually, though, Carrot felt the telltale pressure in his loins that marked the beginning of the end, and he made an effort to warn Pinkie. However, the flaring of his tip seemed to spur Pinkie into a sucking frenzy as she picked up the pace, stopping whatever warning he tried to make as he barreled headlong into climax.

Carrot let off a long groan as he came hard insides the party pony’s muzzle, his senses overtaken by pure explosive pleasure that threatened to knock him out on the spot. But he managed to hold himself up as he continued to spill his essence down that wondrous throat, until the torrent became a trickle in a matter of seconds. Carrot panted in the afterglow, but steadily he came back down to Equestria and his mind settled. The first thing that came to his wracked brain was guilt over what just happened, partly over having to subject Pinkie to the vast quantity of his pent-up sperm.

However, that minor concern was waylaid immediately as Pinkie released his softening dick and looked up at him, a satisfied look on her face and no trace of spunk anyway, save for a minor dribble at the corner of her mouth. He was unquestionably amazed by the feat.

“Wow, that was a lot,” she complimented, wiping away the trace of her deed, only to lick it up from her hoof. “Mmm, salty.”

“Y-Yeah, it has been a while,” he admitted with a blush, both from what he said and Pinkie’s kinky display.

“It’s no good not taking care of that kind of thing for so long.” Pinkie got back up onto her hooves and looked to him with genuine compassion. “Feeling better?”

“Yes, thank you.” Carrot lowered himself back onto all four of his hooves. “I just… don’t know how to feel about it.”

“Oh, it wasn’t good?”

“No Pinkie, it was spectacular. But that’s the thing… You didn’t have to do that. That, or the kiss.”

“But it’s like I said: I help out friends that are in need.”

He sighed to prepare for the next troubling bit. “And that’s the other thing: we’re friends. You’re my employee and my lodger. What you did was not something regular friends do. That’s something you get from a… special somepony. And I already have my special somepony.”

“You said she wasn’t satisfying—”

“But this isn’t the way to go about it, you understand? I’m touched you’d be willing to do that, but something like this could lead to a lot of trouble. It was just us this time, but what if Mrs. Cake came down and saw us? Not to mention that I could’ve very well taken advantage of you, given that you’re intoxicated and not in the right state of mind.”

“But she didn’t catch us, Mr. Cake, and you didn’t take advantage of me. I’m a bit tipsy, sure, but I honestly wanted to make you feel good. There was no ‘forcing me’ about it.”

“You’re missing the point, Pinkie.”

Carrot sighed again, bringing about a moment of silence, which Pinkie broke by placing a gentle hoof on the side of his face.

“I’m sorry if I’m making you worry more. I just wanted to help you out, so that you’re not so stressed. The last thing I want to see is for you to be miserable and not tell anypony about it, especially me. But you did tell me, and I helped. I did help, right?”

Carrot just looked into those glistening baby blues, and his doubts crumbled. “Yes, you did.”

“We can still be friends, Mr. Cake. This could just be a one-time thing. Although,” she paused, giving a sly roll of her eyes. “If you ever feel stressed and need a little more ‘help’, you could ask me. It would be our own little arrangement, but only if you want to.”

Things have gotten messy enough, Carrot thought. Still, those imploring eyes hinted that there’d be no harm just having the option available. “I’ll consider it, Pinkie.”

“That’s great, Mr. Cake.” Pinkie gave a loud yawn. “Seems I burned out the rest of my party buzz. Time for me to hit the hay, so see you tomorrow.” She beamed him a smile before turning around and trotting merrily for the stairs.

“Hey, Pinkie.” The mare stopped and looked over to her somewhat flustered boss. “Um, you can call me Carrot if you want. But only when there’s nopony around.”

Pinkie gave him a bemused look, only for it to switch back to her gleeful countenance. “Okay then, Carrot. Teehee.”

She resumed her trek to her bedroom, leaving Carrot Cake alone in the store once more. He still felt amiss over had had just transpired, and over what he may have potentially entangled himself into. Guilt lingered about the fringes of his mind, and yet he really couldn’t condemn himself for the pleasure he felt, nor the kindness of the mare who gave it to him.

There was some thinking to do, but at least he can do it with less of a burden on his mind and body than before. He allowed himself a little smile, then decided he too would hit the sack. Turning off the light, he made his way upstairs to the master bedroom and joined his sleeping wife. And for the first time in a long while, he slept easy, and contented.

Author's Note

This is usually where your typical semi-decent porn fic comes to a fairly good close. Buuuuut, there's still a bit more to this midnight romp, as you will see.

Sticky

In the weeks following that fateful night, Carrot Cake made good on Pinkie’s offer three more times: once in the master bedroom, once in Pinkie’s room, and once in the kitchen. Save for the spontaneity of the last one, these rendezvous’ were done carefully, when privacy was assured and they had time to enjoy themselves. Every precaution was taken to maintain their secrecy, and it seemed to work out for them. Carrot become more relaxed and better in spirits, expressing a warmer disposition to friends and customers alike, and Pinkie couldn’t have been happier in knowing she helped bring about this change.

However, not long after their last “session”, something came up that not only spoiled the stallion’s fresh mood, but practically threw a crowbar into the gears of Carrot’s orderly life.

“Y-You’re pregnant?” he half-shouted, his lower jaw threatening to hit the floor of the master bedroom as he gawked wide-eyed at the deliverer of the unfortunate news. Probably the worst place to be told such things, but there was no fault in picking it for the sake of privacy.

“I just found out today, so it’s as much a surprise to me,” Pinkie said in a somewhat inappropriate casual air, given the bombshell she dropped.

“B-B-B-But you said you had protection! That it was okay!”

“And I was protected! Or, at least, I think I was—”

“Pinkie! This is serious!” he yelled, grabbing Pinkie’s shoulders with his hooves to shake her lightly. “Do you have any idea what this means? What it’ll do to us!?”

“I-I’m sorry, Carrot. It was an honest mistake.”

“Honest Mistake?” He let go of the bubbly mare and turned around, only for his lower half to hit the floor while bringing up his hooves to cover his head. “This is one of the worst things that could happen. How could I have been so stupid not to have pulled out?”

“It’s okay,” Pinkie said with a reassuring smile. “I let you do it, so it’s my fault for getting knocked up.”

“But I got you pregnant, Pinkie! Doesn’t having to carry a foal not bother you at all?”

“Well, I hadn’t planned on getting one right now, but I’m sure it’ll be fun, if my time with Pound and Pumpkin are any indication. Also, I don’t mind it being yours. You’re like, one of the few stallions who I’d be alright with getting me pregnant, to be honest.”

At this, Carrot got back up and placed his hooves back on Pinkie’s shoulders. “You’re also missing something very important here: I’m a married stallion! It’s only my wife that should be getting pregnant by me!”

“Oh, right. Whoops.”

Carrot resumed his panic pose on the floor. “I go and ruin your life, Cup Cake will be devastated, and everypony will know me for a cheating scumbag. Why didn’t I stop it when I had the chance? She won’t be able to look me in the eye, or anypony for that matter. Business will drop, we’ll wind up destitute and my kids will starve all because of me. Why, why did I let it come to this. Oh why why why—”

“Carrot, listen,” Pinkie spoke, reaching out a hoof to stir the stallion from his pool of growing misery. “None of that will happen if nopony knows about it.”

“And how will you manage that exactly?” he snapped. “You can’t exactly hide a pregnancy. Those things tend to get noticed when you go around town most of the time planning parties and being with friends. Caring friends that ask questions.”

“Well if they ask, then I won’t say that it’s yours—”

“No, absolutely not!” He stood with a heavy stamp of his hoof. “I won’t let you pin this on some other stallion, especially when it’s my child involved.”

“I wouldn’t do that, either,” she said, somewhat hurt. “I would never do that to somepony else.”

“Then how are you—”

“I’ll find a way, trust me,” Pinkie assured him while placing a comforting hoof on the side of his long neck. “It’s my fault for not having protection, so I’ll fix this without getting you, or anypony else in trouble. I Pinkie Promise.”

“I’m not sure—”

“Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.”

Carrot paused upon seeing those signature gestures. Pinkie took her promises very seriously, and to his knowledge she never once broke one she personally made. Then again, what she promised raised some major doubts. In the end, though, he relented with a sigh.

“Okay, Pinkie, I’ll trust you. But, you’re essentially saying that you’ll take care of the foal on your own. That just doesn’t sit well with me.”

“It’s alright, Carrot,” she winked while giving his cheek a light pat. “I can take care of it, and I’m sure this’ll work out in the end. But one thing at a time, starting with me making sure nopony knows about us. Which means that we may have to stop spending special time together.”

“That goes without saying.”

“Okie dokie! So how bout we head back downstairs and do some baking? Plenty of hungry customers are waiting. And don’t forget to smiiiiile!”

She flashed her pearly whites before zipping off to the lower floor, leaving Carrot alone with his thoughts. The matter still stunk to him, and he wasn’t fully able to believe an easy solution to the kerfluffle he just put himself and Pinkie in. But regardless, he forced up a little smile and trotted after his bouncy ward, and did his best to put away his concerns for another time.

For the next several weeks business went on as usual at Sugarcube Corner with nopony the wiser. Pinkie appeared to have been true to the word, never giving any indication that the affair had ever happened. But nature inevitably took its course and the distinct signs of pregnancy inevitably reared itself upon Pinkie’s body. Barely noticeable at first, but as time went on her stomach took on a distinct bulge, which caught the passing eyes of the town’s residents. Nopony confronted her about it and passed it off as a mild curiosity, but eventually the question was raised, and in typical fashion, it happened under the most humble of circumstances.

It was close to three months after Pinkie made her promise to Carrot, and she was enjoying a picnic with her friends by the barn on Sweet Apple Acres on a nice sunny day in early summer. She had a simple hay and daffodil sandwich like the others, with a slathering of chocolate, topped with bonbons and with a side of candy. As she happily munched away, Rainbow Dash brought up the inevitable subject.

“So, Pinkie Pie, we’ve noticed you got yourself something of a… expansion on your gut, there.” Didn’t quite go head-on with it, but nopony’s perfect.

“Uh-huh. Guess I’ve been packing on the pounds,” Pinkie said casually while finishing up her snack.

“Ya don’t say?” Apple Jack asked after taking a sip of her special-brand apple soda.

“Yep. Gotta cut back on the sweets, I guess.” To which Pinkie followed up by guzzling her own bottle of pop.

“Oh please, Pinkie: you burn through calories like it was gunpowder. What’s really going on?” Rainbow pressed her, finally getting closer to the matter.

“Well… okay, I guess I hid it long enough. No point trying to lie about it now that it’s out there, teehee,” she submitted.

“So what is it, dear?” Rarity asked, although she and most of the other girls already suspected the answer.

“Okay, here goes: I’m preggers!”

The announcement got a rise of excited gasps from her friends.

“Whoa, you’re pregnant!?” Rainbow exclaimed with awe.

“As in, you have a foal growing inside you, right now?” Fluttershy asked meekly, a bit of red on her cheeks.

“Yep!”

“Wow, Pinkie, congratulations,” Twilight said.

“Thank you, Twilight. I’m really super-duper excited, too. So looking forward to getting to play with him when he’s born. Or her. It doesn’t matter either way, it’s gonna be great!”

“So when did it happen, exactly?” Applejack asked.

“Why yes, I’m dreadfully curious as well. No doubt it was a romantic, not to mention ravenous encounter,” Rarity said with a gleam in her eye.

“If it’s okay to say, that is,” Fluttershy added.

“It wasn’t anything really special, I’m sorry to say.”

“Oh come on, don’t wuss out on us. It doesn’t have to be precise, but give us something,” Rainbow pried.

“Rainbow Dash, she doesn’t have to if she doesn’t want to,” Twilight chided the fluttering pegasus.

“It’s okay, I don’t mind telling,” Pinkie spoke up. “It’s simple enough, really. It was at one of my parties several months ago. I just hooked up with a stallion, we did the nasty, and then I wound pregnant and telling you guys about it!”

A vocal and physical shrug went out across the listeners.

“Well that was a letdown,” Rainbow remarked, to Twilight’s chagrin.

“Rainbow!”

“Whaaat? I was kinda expecting something more than a one night stand gone wrong.”

“Rainbow!”

“So, um, you didn’t want to have it?” Fluttershy asked carefully.

“I hadn’t planned on it, but I’m still looking forward to having one. Been something of a dream since the twins came around, hmhm.”

“While I don’t condone your engagement of unprotected intercourse, I suppose I can be fine with it if you’re getting something out of it to make you happy,” Rarity waved with an accepting hoof.

“So who’s the lucky stallion that we’re gonna have to hogtie and drag to the altar for yer benefit?”

“Really, Applejack, it doesn’t have to be so forceful,” Rarity playfully chastised the farmpony.

“Well it’s no worries, guys, since I don’t know who it is.” Pinkie’s response garnered some curious looks from her friends.

“What do you mean ‘you don’t know’?” Rainbow asked. “You did the dirty, so surely you had to have gotten his name. Or at least what he looked like.”

“That’s the funny thing about it. It must have happened when I was asleep during the party. I must’ve been really tuckered out, so I couldn’t tell you who it was.” She stopped to look at the wall of firm, blank stares that her friends were giving her. The moments of silence that followed started to wear at her smile. “...What?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t think we heard you correctly,” Rarity was the first to speak. “Did you say you were asleep?”

“Uh-huh. That’s what I said.” Another, though shorter moment of silence, after which Rainbow Dash took it upon herself to put the pieces together for the group.

“So, you’re telling us… that at the party... some stallion, had sex with you… while you were unconscious.”

“Yepper!” That’s when a dawning realization came to Pinkie Pie a little too late, making her drop her smile like a bad habit. “N-No wait—”

“Dear Goddesses, that's horrible!” Rarity cried out, sealing the fate of the conversation to Pinkie’s distress.

“Somepony did that to you?” Twilight shouted in disbelief.

“What lowdown snake would do something like that?” Applejack asked in wrath.

“Somepony who won’t be able to walk once I’m done with him!” Rainbow punctuated with a banging of her hooves. Seeing the hypothetical torches and pitchforks rising among her friends (except maybe Fluttershy), Pinkie made a last-ditch effort at damage control.

“Uh, hey, guys, it’s nothing to freak out about. I don’t mind it at all. No biggie, really.”

“No biggie?” Twilight replied as, looking as though she’d been slapped in the face. “Pinkie, you were raped! There’s no telling what else they could have done to you aside from getting you pregnant!”

“But I’m fine, honestly! I’m just the same ol’ fun-loving me, only with an added passenger on the party wagon.”

“This is no time for jokin’, girl,” Applejack chided. “There’s some varmint out there who made you a single mom without yer consent and has some major answerin’ to do.”

“Okay, girls, here’s what needs to be done,” the alicorn announced, taking reign of the crisis. “If it happened at one of Pinkie’s parties, then it’s likely to have been someone who lives here in Ponyville. Since nopony’s moved out of town these past few months, then they’re still very likely around.”

“So let’s go nab some stallions and find that scumbag!”

“Not so fast, Rainbow. It’d be easier if we find out which party it happened at, thus narrowing down the list of possible suspects.”

“Good idea, darling,” Rarity firmly nodded. “It would do no good to start rounding up every stallion in Ponyville.”

“No guys, really, there’s no need to—”

“It’s just so scary that something like this has happened,” Fluttershy interrupted Pinkie, surprisingly enough. “I hope we can find out who did it soon, for Pinkie’s sake.”

“But girls, I’m okay wi—”

“And every other mare in this town,” Applejack spoke up, to Pinkie’s mounting dismay.

“Right, so let’s head back to the castle. I’ll need to do some research so as to determine where to start. Pinkie, I’ll need you to come as well so I can do an examination of the foal for extra intel.”

“There’s no need to, Twilight, I’m being—”

“There’s no time to lose! Off to the castle!”

“Right!” was the the resounding group reply, as five of the mares got up and dashed from the barn and toward the Castle of Friendship. Pinkie merely sat and stared at her retreating friends, worry and guilt steadily filling her head over her massive slip-up.

“Oh no…” she whimpered.

Coarse

Following a pow-wow of dire proportions at the Castle of Friendship, the Elements of Harmony made haste into Ponyville, with Pinkie Pie reluctantly hopping along behind. A quick magic scan from Twilight showed Pinkie’s foal to be perfectly healthy without any abnormalities, but it also revealed its current stage of development, allowing the meticulous alicorn to pinpoint what party conception had occurred. Subsequently, this revealed what stallions were in need of questioning.

The plan of execution was simple enough, involving the handing out of certain royally-notarized letters to the individuals of interest, personally delivered by Princess Twilight herself. The other Element Bearers would provide a formidable entourage in the task, yet seeing her friends marching through town only worsened Pinkie’s fretting. After having made the first two deliveries, she decided to make another grab for the controls before this train went off the rails.

“Say, Twilight?”

“Yes, Pinkie?” Twilight responded, not ceasing her even-paced trot toward their next destination.

“I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but is this really the best way to go about it? It’s like we’re holding a big deal trial or something.”

“That’s essentially what it is.”

“Too clean for their likes,” Rainbow Dash grumbled from her lofty spot. “We should just drag them by their tails or manes or something. Cowards like that deserve as much.”

“We have to be civil about this, Rainbow,” Twilight said. “Have to set an example for proper recourse and legal conduct. This isn’t the dark ages.”

“Dunno bout you,” Applejack said. “I’m fine for just tying them up and pulling them along in a line. That’s plenty orderly, I say.”

“Pinkie, are you sure you should be bouncing around while a foal is growing inside of your?”

“Actually, Rarity,” Twilight interjected. “Research has shown that performing aerobics can help improve one’s overall pregnancy, as well as potentially make the foal more resilient during labor. So go ahead, Pinkie: jostle that baby. But so long as you don’t fall while doing it.”

“But really, I’m fine with this. Can’t we just let it—”

“You might be fine with this for whatever reason, but the fact remains that there’s a rapist on the loose,” Twilight said back to Pinkie, taking on a firmer tone. “For this town’s safety we have to catch him before he can strike again. And you better not say ‘with his penis’, Rainbow.”

“I wasn’t going to, sheesh!”

Their banter brought them up to the door of the next suspect on the list. A few taps at the door and it opened, revealing the brown-maned head of an unassuming earth stallion.

“Oh well, if it isn’t Twilight Sparkle. This is quite the surprise.” A magic-encased envelope smacked in the face. “What’s this?” he asked while grabbing the envelope and tearing it open, pulling out the neatly-written parchment within.

“Caramel, by royal decree you have been summoned to an important gathering at Sugarcube Corner tomorrow evening,” Twilight answered promptly. “Seven o’clock, and don’t be late. If you try to leave Ponyville town limits at any point, I will personally have you restrained and brought back by force.”

“Umm, okay… I’ll be there then.”

“Good. See you at seven tomorrow.” Twilight about-faced and proceeded with her mission, her friends in two. “Only a few more to go, girls.”

“Don’t know why we can’t do it tonight. Give the punk less time to wiggle out of town,” Rainbow thought aloud.

“There’s still some more planning to do before things are properly set up. But that will be taken care of after these next few deliveries, I can assure you.”

“Thank goodness it won’t be too long,” Fluttershy said. “This whole thing has me nervous, and I don’t know if it’s out of fear or excitement.”

“Well we’re gonna do away with the fear, that’s for sure,” Applejack said. “And get ourselves excited with some good ol’ fashion justice.”

“Indeed,” Twilight agreed, quickening her pace to the next residence on their route. Pinkie strayed back for a moment so no one could hear her self-berating “You dummy mummy!” before she resumed her reluctant bouncing.

After finishing their rounds, the Friends of Harmony made one final stop at the site of the evening’s events: Sugarcube Corner. The pudgy blue-coated matriarch of the Cake household was tending to her pegasus colt Pound, while the ever-stocky Carrot stood to the side with a slightly confused look over the party of six that just came in. After exchanging the usual greetins and small talk, Twilight said,

“So I take it you’re aware of Pinkie Pie’s pregnancy.”

“No, she hadn’t told us, but I had suspected,” Mrs. Cake warmly replied as she put her wiggling foal into a high chair. “Oh I think it’s wonderful to have another bundle of joy here in the house, and luckily not one coming from me, hohoho.”

“The circumstances for this particular bundle aren’t quite so joyful, I’m sad to report,” Twilight said gravely. “The means by which it came about were by non-consensual means, by an unknown stallion party.”

“Non-consensual? As in she was…” Mrs. Cake raised a hoof to cover her gasp, while Mr. Cake’s shocked face went unnoticed. “Oh no, that’s terrible! Who would do such a thing to our sweet Pinkie Pie?”

“That’s what we aim to find out, ma’am,” Applejack answered.

“But we’ll need your cooperation,” Twilight resumed. “We’re going to have the suspects come here so we can better find the culprit. I believe having them surrounded by Pinkie’s loved ones and in her own home might instill enough guilt to provoke a quick confession. Would tomorrow night at seven o’clock be fine with you?”

“Oh by all means, sure, Twilight. Whatever you need to from us to help corner this despicable creature, you can have it. Right, Carrot?”

“Oh uh uh uh, of course, sweetie buns,” Carrot replied, fighting back the sweat threatening to form on his brow. “Say, um, Twilight, is it okay if I talked to Pinkie in private for a bit? Give her a few consoling words?”

“Of course, Mr. Cake,” Twilight nodded, allowing Carrot to lead Pinkie up the stairs. Once on the second landing, he turned to the mare and spoke in a low, but harsh whisper.

“What the hell is all this, Pinkie?”

“I’m sorry, Carrot,” she said in a regretful whisper. “I kinda said things the wrong way, but don’t worry: they don’t have any idea it’s you.”

“Because they think some random pony raped you instead! That’s really not much better!”

“But it’ll be okay,” Pinkie said with renewed spirits. “The ones who will be coming are very nice gentlestallions. When they see that none of them had their way with me, then they’ll forget the whole thing and everything will be right again.”

“None of your friends don’t look like they’d just let it go. What if they go looking for more stallions, then what?”

“That’s the thing: after they see what a bust tomorrow will be, they probably won’t bother for a second time. So win-win, no further complications.”

“It’s an extremely complicated matter you can’t just brush aside, you know.”

“Just trust me.” She winked. “They’re not the kind of ponies to blow things out of proportion, especially over little ol’ me.” This bit of assurance only got a worrisome grimace from the stallion.

The final preparations were done, and the hour of reckoning arrived the following evening. With Ponyville settling in for the night, Sugarcube Corner was alight and adorned with extra couches and chairs for the summoned attendees: two pegasi, two earth ponies and a unicorn, who will be introduced shortly. With the stallions lounging around in their assorted chairs, the Element Bearers took center stage in the center of the room, with the Cakes standing off to the side along with Spike, acting as stenographer for the proceedings.

The royalty at present stepped forward, bringing the random murmurings to a halt. Twilight began:

“Thank you all for coming. You might be wondering why you have been called here this evening and what the nature of this meeting is, so I’ll explain. A most heinous crime was performed not too long ago against one of our closest friends, and no doubt a good friend to you all as well. We have gathered you all here tonight because we’re holding an investigation that involves all of you. To put it frankly, somepony in this room... is a rapist!”

The gasps that were caused by that statement could’ve silenced an entire symphony of dramatic stings. But before anypony could comment, Twilight resumed.

“Some time ago, our dearest friend Pinkie Pie was impregnated as she was sleeping during one of her parties. The act itself may have been innocent enough, but the fact that it was done while she was unconscious and without her consent makes it downright despicable! After careful research of the timeframe of Pinkie’s pregnancy and the development of the fetus, I’ve narrowed down the likeliest time of conception to during the ‘Repaired the Schoolhouse Bell Celebration’ of almost three months ago. It was the only party around that time where Pinkie had reportedly taken a nap part way through due to:” The alicorn paused to look over some notes. “Fatigue brought on by ‘excessive cheering’ and ‘one round too many in testing the ringing harmonics’. You stallions which we have gathered were the only ones in attendance as you each helped out in the repairs, or had some involvement in the party-planning, and thus are the only possible suspects for this heinous act. Before this night is over, we’ll discover who among us is the ruthless pilferer of filly innocence!”

“I don’t know about you guys, but I’m actually surprised it’s taken this long to happen.”

“What was that, Thunderlane?” railed out Rainbow Dash, as she flew over to and pressed her face squarely into that of the coal-black pegasus. “You saying our best friend is loose or something, huh?”

“Well, uh, no I’m not,” he answered as Rainbow gave his face some breathing room. “Just saying that, the way she parties, wouldn’t surprise me if it might, you know, come back and bite her?”

“Oh, and how would you know what type of consequences there’d be? Unless it was you who gave her that specific consequence? Is that what you’re implying at, huh huh Huh??”

“W-What? No! I’m not implying anything, and I’m no rapist either!”

“We’ll be running a truth detector as we make our inquiries.” Twilight announced as her magic brought over a device with two cylinders attached to it by wiring.

“I’ll also have my lasso on standby if any guilty parties try to make a break for it,” Applejack said with a fierce look, snapping a length of rope to emphasize her statement.

Twilight took her device and hovered it over Thunderlane’s head. After checking its readings, she declared, “He checks out. Good work, Rainbow.”

“My pleasure,” Rainbow said with a smirk. “Now on to the next perp.” She hovered over to the powder blue unicorn stallion with the flossy mane. “So then, Pokey, you’ve been eyeing Pinkie for the longest time, but she wouldn’t give no matter how much you asked, so you took it for yourself. Typical desperate stalker if I ever saw one.”

“Since when have I ever been a stalker!?” he cried in exasperation.

“Yeah, excuse me,” Thuderlane butted in. “On what authority do you have in bringing us here and harassing us with these ridiculous accusations?”

Twilight cocked an eyebrow as she looked at him curiously. “Oh, haven’t you read the summons? I’m a Princess of Equestria: I have all the authority! Make another outburst like that and I’ll have you cited for obstructing Ponyville justice.”

“Yes, you ruffian!” Rarity threatened while shaking a hoof at him.

“What’s the deal, Rarity? I saved your life once.”

“Once!”

“Moving along.” Twilight turned her critical gaze on simple-looking and increasingly-discomforted Caramel. “What do you have to say for yourself?”

“Uhhh, not guilty?”

“Cut the malarkey!” Rainbow Dash slammed her hooves into the couch, making the earth stallion go rigid. “You thought you could get a little sugar on the side along with your marefriend, eh? A nice taste of lollipop that you could toss aside without any repercussions. Well it doesn’t work that way, bub! Tell him how it is, Fluttershy.”

“Um, what you did was wrong and you should feel wrong?” came the demure condemnation.

“Exactly! And that sort of thing weighs heavy on your conscience. Only a matter of time till it cracks, so what’s it gonna be?”

“I swear I didn’t do it!” Caramel yelped. “I was one of the first to leave, along with my marefriend. We don’t party as much as other ponies. And why would I cheat on my marefriend while she was there with me?”

“A likely story if there ever was one.”

“But it’s the truth, Rainbow. Onward.” As Twilight and her partner went on to the next suspect, Cup Cake watched the interrogations unfold with unsteady feelings.

“It’s hard to believe that one of our very friends or neighbors could do something like this to Pinkie,” she softly commented.

“It’s pretty awful, yeah, but it also makes darn good entertainment,” Spike replied from his seat, midway through stuffing another clawful of popcorn into his face while taking notes. Back to the inquisition in progress, the ladies approached the burly, gentle red giant that needed no introduction.

“Big Macintosh,” Rainbow began. “A stallion very well-known to our group. So much so that you’re practically a part of it.”

“Eeyup,” he humbly nodded.

“Figured you’d use that camaraderie to get some of that Pinkie action? Or maybe you had to slip in some hoofies to get the job done.”

“Nope.”

“So then you never touched her, nor conspired to do so, in any way that was unwanted or potentially harmful to her?”

“Eeyup.”

The cyan pegasus looked to her alicorn observer, who gave her an acknowledging nod. Then she finished with, “No further questions.” As she moved on, Applejack took a step forward.

“Now Big Mac, I know you’re a good-hearted stallion and would never do any unkindness to anyone. But remember that it’s a mortal sin to want to canoodle with somepony of close relations, even if it’s a distant cousin. Ya hear me?”

“Eeyup.”

“Good. You may continue, Twilight.”

“Thank you, Applejack.” Thus Twilight and Rainbow Dash reached the final suspect: the hulking white pegasus with the chiseled chin and bulging muscles, Bulk Biceps. Despite his gargantuan physique, he looked very nervous, shifting in his seat and casting his eyes around at everypony’s intent looks.

“Alright, Bulk, that just leaves you,” Rainbow said with her violet eyes piercing into his. “No use hiding it: you’re the one who raped Pinkie Pie and got her pregnant, weren’t you?”

“YEAAH! Oh uh uh no, I didn’t. I-I shout out ‘yeah’ as a nervous reaction. I’d never do anything like that to Pinkie unless she asked.”

“Then maybe you purposely misinterpreted what she asked you. She probably told you no, but then you think to yourself, ‘she said no to doing it awake, but doing it while she’s sleeping should be fine’. That’s precisely how it went down, isn’t it?”

“N-No, I swear! Please, you gotta believe me!” The way he waved his veiny legs around, it was as though he were trying to ward off some nighttime terror.

“Just admit it and quit yanking us around! Big tough guy pony wanting to assert himself by using a helpless mare to satisfy his filthy, cowardly desires. That’s exactly what you are, Bulk. You’re that no-good wannabe tough guy pony arentcha? Arentcha?”

“YEAAH!!”

“Okay that’s ENOUGH!!”

The shout turned every pair of eyes in the room toward the flustered, jaw-clenched look of Mr. Cake, who appeared to be edging toward a major breakdown.

“I can’t allow this to continue. Not anymore,” he said in a more calm, though just as loud tone.

“But Mr. Cake—”

“No, Pinkie, this has gone way out of hoof. I’m not going to sit by and let more stallions get roped into this insanity. I’m going to pony up and tell the truth.”

This statement rose every brow present, and the turning of gears in some of the sharper minds, foremost being Twilight.

“Wait, the truth? You mean…?”

With a deep breath, Mr. Cake let it out. “Yes: it was me. I was the one who got Pinkie Pie pregnant. It’s my foal she’s carrying.”

No amount of chinaware in the world could match the shattering of everyone’s collective thoughts. Eyes widened, several jaws dropped, and everyone was speechless in awe of the revealed adulterer. None expressed a greater look of shock than that that was painted Mrs. Cake’s face.

“Carrot…” she spoke barely above a whisper. “If it’s you, then you, you...”

“Yes, we had an affair. For about a month, in this very house.”

“No, Mr. Cake!” Pinkie pleaded, but was abruptly cut off.

“Pinkie came to me drunk and offered to relieve my frustrations, and I allowed her to. I could’ve stopped her before she did, and I could’ve ended it that night afterward, but instead I did it some more. She shares none of the blame; she just wanted to help in her way and I took advantage of her.”

“C-Carrot…”

Carrot Cake continued, unheeding of Pinkie’s whimper.

“It was stupid, reckless, and now I’ve ruined her life and had others accused of rape because I couldn’t be a stronger stallion and come clean about it sooner. I’m sorry to everypony, but most of all…” He paused as he looked ashamedly toward his stricken wife. “I’m sorry to you, Cup Cake. I have no excuse for what I’ve done.”

Hardly a breath was exhaled in the wake of the confession. Most of the ponies were busy processing what had been spoken. Opinions were reshaping, reactions were being contemplated. Twilight and friends looked the most dumbfounded over it, with Pinkie almost on the verge of tears. Yet, the one face that softened first was that of Cup Cake, which dropped away from the stares of everypony… only to harden and steadily take on a redder hue that made one whispered reply.

“Get out…”

“What?”

Her head immediately snapped up. “All of you get out of my house. Just get out and go back home, all of you!”

“But honey—”

“Don’t ‘honey’ me you fucking philandering bastard!” she screamed at her unfaithful husband, making everypony else reel back. “That goes especially to you and that insufferable pink whore!”

“Now Mrs. Cake, really—” But Twilight’s intervening was just as abruptly snapped off as Cup Cake exploded.

“You can just go find somewhere else, raise your love child happily together or find another fuckpony, whatever the fuck you want! I won’t have either of you living under this roof or come anywhere near my children! So just get out!”

“But—”

“I said OUT! Get the hell out all of you! Out Out Out Out OUT OUT OUUUUUUUUT!!!”

Before the screeches of the enraged baker, everypony made quick time in getting out of the building. After Carrot Cake was forcefully shoved out onto the streets on his rump, the front door slammed and the sound of locks rang through the evening air, followed by harsh silence. After exchanging some uncomfortable looks, the assembled stallions went their own ways, leaving Twilight and friends to tend to their evicted companion and her employer-turned-lover.

Pinkie approached Carrot from behind and spoke first.

“I know she’s mad, Carrot, but if we give her some time, I bet we can talk it over with her. Surely this will blow over when she remembers how much she loves you.”

There was no immediate reply, only a shuddering from the hunched-over stallion.

“Carrot?”

Pinkie reached out a comforting hoof, but stopped upon hearing,

“Pinkie…”

“Huh?”

“...Don’t ever call me Carrot.”

She pulled back and froze after a glare of mixed sorrow and simmering rage met her eyes.

“Don’t ever speak to me again, either.”

“B-B-B-B-B—”

“You’ve done more than enough!” Carrot stood up and let his stomping hooves match the anger in his voice. “I won’t have you ‘fixing’ anything any more!”

Without another word he trotted into the darkened streets, leaving Pinkie to helplessly watch him storm off with an impotent hoof and a slack, gaping muzzle. Several downtrodden seconds past before she herself fell to the ground on her rump, never taking her eyes from the direction of Carrot’s departure. Her mouth closed and her lips quivered a moment, her poofy mane deflated, and then the waterworks came.

Her friends came to her side immediately as she blubbered to the sky over the tragedy she had caused. The comforting pats and words of her friends couldn’t stem the tide of her sorrows that broke her springy spirit without restraint. Amid her sobs she barely managed to choke out,

“I-I-I only wanted to help,” before succumbing to unrelenting grief. And so she cried in her bubble of misery, right in front of her former home, the rest of the town ignorant to the damning revelation. But as with all small towns, this touch of mercy wouldn’t last.

Author's Note

I'll just leave this here as a little interlude music :twilightsmile:

Bitter

Thus, Ponyville bore witness to the downfall of one of its most endearing couples. The following morning, the citizens awoke to find a pile of various worldly effects and furniture taking up the street space in front of Sugarcube Corner, most of it belonging to Carrot Cake and Pinkie Pie. Likely tossed during some great emotional fury in the middle of the night, though what hour precisely no one could say. Shortly after this discovery, Carrot was seen hopping the next train to Manehatten with some of his belongings, final destination unknown. Word spread quickly of the circumstances, and soon everypony regarded Pinkie Pie as Ponyville’s premiere home-wrecker and the cause of the woe that befell the Cake household in the weeks that followed.

Luckily, she still had friends to support her, even while most of the town turned their noses up at her plight. Twilight jumped on the chance to help her lodging situation by offering temporary residence in the Castle of Friendship, finding it the perfect opportunity to observe a foal’s development up close. However, there were some concessions to be made with such an arrangement. Pinkie had to undergo regular medical check-ups and questionnaires regarding her pregnancy, all administered by her overbearingly inquisitive hostess, though Pinkie swayed her to keep the foal’s gender a surprise. Pinkie Pie’s movements and everyday exertions also had to be kept closely monitored, meaning considerably less freedom in moving about and being random and carefree. Then there was the dietary matters…

“Uhhh, Twilight, what happened to the sugar and cereal?” Pinkie asked one ordinary morning.

“I swapped them out,” was the cheery straight-forward answer. “From now until the foal is born you’ll be eating oats, fruits, vegetables, herbal teas, and perhaps the occasional sweets and sugary beverage. But those will be highly limited.”

“But come on, Twilight, you know me: I run on sugar. It’s what gives me my ‘get-up-and-go, face the world head-on’ vibe.”

“My extensive research shows that reckless eating can have negative effects on a foal’s development and could lead to them being born with diabetes or heart disease or any number of other maladies from the start. Though you’ve never been afflicted by such complications, I just want to ensure the foal gets the best start possible. Physiologically speaking, that is.”

“But my mouth is gonna be soooo bored,” Pinkie lamented as she poked at an uninspiring sprig of wheat grass.

“Just know it’s for your foal’s good. On the bright side, you get to drink as much milk as you want.”

“Can it be chocolate milk??” Pinkie brightened up.

“No, but I could add some vitamin-enriched cocoa powder to regular milk. In precisely measured quantities, of course.”

“Phooey…”

Things outside the castle didn’t fare any better. With her new reputation dangling over her puffy pink mane, nopony approached her for any party-planning, and even parties that had been scheduled months prior were abruptly cancelled, the clients’ trust in Pinkie Pie having been dashed by her new reputation. The fact most ponies in town wouldn’t even talk to her beyond a few passing words in greeting put her into a moody state. To worsen matters, toward the sixth month of pregnancy, Twilight had put a ban on all strenuous activity, including her therapeutic bouncing!

With much of the town looking down on her, the absence of her favorite sugary foods, the restraints on her own mobility, and hormonal imbalances to top it all off, Pinkie found herself the victim of some of the most debilitating mood swings Equestria ever saw. And it was up to her dearest friends to help her weather them, each more miserable than the last.

“I’ve got to be the worst pony who ever existed in the history of eveeer!” Pinkie wailed out during her latest and most crippling emotional lowpoint. “I’m just so dumb and stupid and keep getting everypony into trouble with my fat stupid ugly mouth!”

“You’re not stupid or ugly,” Fluttershy assured her, acting as Pinkie’s primary on-call motivational support. “You make lots of ponies happy with your parties. A lot of foals especially like your birthday parties.”

“And my foal is gonna wind up being hated by everypony because his-her-whatever mom destroys families. Nopony will want to be friends with him or her, and he’ll/she’ll be made fun of cuz they’ll have no father, all because of moronic me. And I am totally ugly! Look at how fat I am: I couldn’t even skip if I wanted to.” She pointed to her sizable belly, tears streaming down her face.

“Now really, dear, you’re being much too hard on yourself.” Being an expert in drama, Rarity knew how to maneuver around such an emotional minefield. “It’s only a temporary bit of weight, which your extraordinary metabolism will surely burn off once the foal has arrived. Besides, some say the pregnant look makes some mares seemingly glow.”

“Yeah, Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash agreed, who still hung around to help out her prankster partner in crime. Said helpfulness is subject to debate. “You’re like a, a, a fun-loving party balloon. Yeah, that’s right!”

“A party balloon that ruins ponies’ liiiiiiiives!” To that, Rainbow Dash could only shrug, utterly conflicted.

So it went on in the Castle of Friendship, with Pinkie riding the waves of inconveniences that come with expecting. From pity sessions to sullenness to outlandish food cravings and body cramps and, of course, the inexplicable spikes in arousal that led to a few awkward moments between Pinkie and her uptight caretaker (bet you’d want to know about that, huh you pervs ;]). A murky, pedestrian sort of harmony for such a tumultuous start, but as is the unpredictable nature of life, little things come along to add flux to the mix.

One such thing came about well into Pinkie Pie’s eighth month of pregnancy, some time after the Running of the Leaves (which she couldn’t commentate on, adding to her list of lamentations). A steady rainfall had come to town that afternoon, and the Friends of Harmony were gathered at the castle for a rainy day sleepover. With a roaring fire in the main hall keeping things cozy, the girls lounged about, making small talk and eating snacks atop their personal pillows. The mother-to-be was packing a massive baby bulge and felt extra grumpy, keeping to her own pile of comforters outside the group while scarfing down a tub of diet vanilla ice cream (one of the few dietary exceptions Twilight allowed for certain occasions).

“So how long this rain gonna last, RD?” Applejack asked from her beaten home-made pillow.

“It’s scheduled for the rest of today, but should be cleared up before tomorrow morning,” Rainbow Dash answered from her official Wonderbolt brand long pillow.

“This sort of rain is very nice and relaxing,” Fluttershy commented atop her quilty throw pillow. “Say, Pinkie Pie, tomorrow when it clears up, you could perhaps step around in the puddles. You’ve liked jumping around in them during a gentle rainstorm like this.”

“Rassem frassem nassem dumb puddles dassum,” Pinkie grumbled before stuffing her mouth with a giant scoop of ice cream.

“I think a walk around outside is a swell idea, Fluttershy,” Twilight said atop from her trio of regal yet conservative lounge pillows. “Fresh air can cheer just about anypony up, especially when they’re cooped up for so long.”

“It’s because the town hates me, so I’m saving them the bother of having to look at me,” Pinkie talked through another mouthful of ice cream.

“That’s no way to talk, Pinkie Pie,” Rarity said from her designer gem-studded deluxe body rester. “Though it’s true some of the busybodies buzz about your situation and the town’s overall opinion of you has waned somewhat… okay, fairly considerably, but all you need to do is get out there and show them you’re still the kind-hearted, thoughtful, and energetic mare everypony knows and looks up to. Take it from me: holing yourself up out of despair has never helped anypony.”

“That’s exactly right,” Twilight nodded. “As soon as the foal is born, your mood swings will go away and you can get back out there as the funnest pony to be with.”

“A good thing it’s only a few more months,” Rarity remarked. “Despondency really doesn’t suit you, Pinkie.” Pinkie only gave a lazy growl and wave before resuming her ice cream massacre.

Suddenly there came a knock at the door… which translated to a hollow pounding from the thick double doors at the other end of the entrance hall.

“Uh, what was that?” Rainbow needlessly asked.

“Who could that be at a time like this?” Twilight asked with some concern, just as her dutiful dragon assistant waddled by.

“Allow me to get that, ladies,” Spike said in his most polite, sleepover taskmaster voice. Some seconds of anticipation passed before the the girls heard the main door open, followed by a low “Whoa” from the baby dragon, which was quickly followed up with, “Twilight, I think you should come here.”

“Who is it, Spike?” the princess asked as she got up and trotted for the door. The others, brimming with curiosity, soon found themselves up and following their lavender friend.

“Don’t leave us hanging, Spike. Who is it already?” Rainbow asked as she fluttered to the main doors.

The group made it to Spike, who held one of the main doors open to look at the evening time caller. Taking up places at the opening, they looked out into the darkened outdoors, and instantly gaped in surprise. Despite the rain-drenched hat and overcoat, there was no confusing the skinny-build, the yellow fur and the ginger mane of Carrot Cake. He looked wretched, with bags under his eyes and a five o’clock shadow well past its bedtime. The stallion simply stood there in the downpour, his eyes shifting between the ground and the group of mares eyeing him.

Being the diplomatic sort, Twilight was the first to overcome her surprise and greet the stallion, if but in a shaky fashion.

“Mr. Cake…”

“Hello, Twilight. Girls,” he said in a hushed, weary tone.

“When did you get back into town?”

“About an hour ago. Didn’t get much sleep on the train ride here, wandered a bit. Listen, I need to talk to you, and Pinkie Pie.”

“About what?” Twilight adopted a tone of selfless concern at hearing his wavering voice.

“Is Pinkie here? Or is she somewhere else?”

“What’s it to ya?” Being the brash sort, Rainbow Dash wasn’t one to let somepony’s sudden reappearance make her silent for very long. Especially somepony she had a bone to pick with. “She didn’t seem that big a concern when you skipped town all those months ago. How was the trip, anyway? Real scenic?”

“Please, I just want to know if she’s alright. Let me kn—”

“You’re letting a draft in! Who’s at the door?”

The cantankerous interruption preceded the approach of Pinkie Pie, trudging against her grump and expanded waist to see the fuss for herself. Upon seeing it, her attitude did a backflip as her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. Carrot managed to spot her through the lineup of heroines and had the same reaction, only far more restrained.

“M-Mr. Cake…?”

A tired smile took up the stallion’s face before he uttered, “Pinkie…”

The pregnant pony trotted lazily to the open door, not averting her gaze of her long-absent employer. Her friends stepped aside as she came up to a foot from him, looking deeply into his face. As Carrot found himself getting lost in those familiar blue eyes that had brightened up his days for so many years, Pinkie decked him out flat on the watery ground with a straight hoof to the schnozz.

Carrot sputtered some rainwater as he looked up from his puddle, seeing a now-fretting Pinkie Pie.

“Whoa, way to go, Pinkie Pie!” Rainbow patted her pal on the shoulder.

“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry I didn’t know what came over me! Just seeing you filled me with all these feelings which got tangled up with these other feelings I had from being pregnant and for that one second I needed to hit something! I didn’t mean to hurt you it’s just these mommy hormones are making me do crazy things.”

“Like ya haven’t done crazy before,” Applejack remarked.

“Only it’s unintentional this time!”

“That’s perfectly fine, Pinkie,” Carrot said over his fat, wet lip. “Had that kind of thing coming in some form or other. Probably should have hit me harder, to be honest.”

After a pause and an exchange of looks between friends, Twilight came forward and offered a hoof to the fallen stallion. “Come inside and we can talk.” Carrot nodded before accepting the hoof and getting back on his wobbly hooves.

Soon everypony was gathered in the breakfast nook close to the main hall, sitting around the gleaming table with their bedraggled guest. Spike had just finished passing around cups of hot cocoa and coffee and took up a seat near the table, waiting for the drama to unfold.

“I guess the first thing you want to know is why I left town without a word,” Carrot began, nursing his piping mug.

“You’d be right,” Applejack said sternly.

“To put it bluntly, I was distraught and had no idea what to do,” he explained. “I’d never seen Cup Cake so angry before, and I was scared beyond reason for what I did. I thought I’d come back the next day and maybe talk things out with her, like Pinkie suggested, but when I saw all my things just piled there out on the street, I knew it was over. So I took whatever I could carry and ran away. She hadn’t closed out our accounts by the time I found a bank, so I was able to pull out enough to support me while I went around looking for someplace to find a fresh start.”

“And that didn’t pan out well, did it,” Rainbow surmised harshly.

“Heh, I’m not young anymore. I can’t gallivant all over the place, doing odd jobs and make a comfortable living as a traveling bum. Nopony would want a sad old horse like me, especially if they learn that I fooled around with younger mares like some creep. Besides, even if I could live like that, if I didn’t mind being a creep and do whatever the hell I wanted, I simply wouldn’t.”

“And why is that?” Rarity asked. Carrot looked down into his cup of Joe, and with a deep breath he resumed.

“Because I still love my wife. Even after what I’ve done and what she said to me, I still love her to death. Deep down I know there can never be another mare in my life who I can love as much as her, whether they’re more beautiful, younger, smarter, richer, or anything like that. I tried telling myself for months that it was all gone, that I could never get it back, to just move on. But I can’t; no amount of drinking or travel or late nights could make me forget what I had run from. I don’t want to abandon her, or my kids. And I mean all my kids. And knowing that I also left a good friend scared and betrayed only tore at my insides more.”

“Didn’t seem that way when you told Pinkie to buck off like it was all her fault,” Rainbow accused.

“Yeah. Where do you get off puttin’ your adulterin’ on somepony else’s head, then up and leave them under a heap of misplaced guilt?” Applejack added.

“I wasn’t thinking straight at the time,” Carrot replied. “My very life was falling down around me, and I lashed out at others instead of myself. I could’ve at least found time to apologize before leaving, but I didn’t do that either. I just kept making one regrettable mistake after another.”

“That’s okay, Mr. Cake,” Pinkie spoke up. “It all started because I came onto you. You had never asked for it, so it’s still really all my fault this has happened. To the both of us.”

“I still could’ve stopped you, like any responsible stallion. But I didn’t, and look where we are.” He shook his head. “I want to set things right before I make anymore trouble. I want to be there to raise our foal, Pinkie. I want him to have a father and not wind up a bastard through no fault of their own. And they should be with their brother and sister, instead of becoming a stranger or an embarrassment to his family.” He stopped to put his head into his hooves, his composure faltering. “I’ve been piling on so many mistakes and I want to fix them all. But I’ll probably just make more of them like always if I go it alone. I just need help from you, please. Help me get back to my wife and family…”

He shuddered with silent sobs, bringing a damper to everyone’s moods. Even the hardened looks of Rainbow Dash and Applejack softened at such a pitiful sight, and Pinkie already had tears growing at the sides of her eyes. Rarity was the first to break through the veil of sorrow.

“Although you hurt our friend’s feelings and practically relegated her to single parenthood, I suppose if you’re willing to make amends, then we could help. Is that so, girls?”

The others looked to her, then to each other.

“You seem pretty worked-up over what ya done, and we’d be regular heels not to give ya a chance, if only cuz you’re lookin’ to help out Pinkie Pie proper,” Applejack said.

“Like she said: we’ll give ya a shot, for Pinkie’s sake,” Rainbow added, to Pinkie’s glee.

“Although it took you several months, you still came back, and in the end that’s what matters,” Fluttershy softly commended.

Carrot looked up from his hooves, then wiped his muzzle as he collected himself. “I deeply appreciate that. And I’m sorry for having got you wrapped up into this as you were… could’ve saved several ponies a headache if I’d fessed up.”

“Well, we did get a little carried away and sort of drove you to speak out at an inopportune time, so it’s partially our fault as well,” Twilight spoke. “The least we could do is help patch things up with a calmer, smoother approach.” A cunning glimmer lit in her eye as an idea struck. “And I think I know just how to do it…”

Tart

There was a mild chill in the air the following afternoon. Evidence of the previous day’s rainfall were scattered about in the form of errant puddles and soaked bits of foliage spread around. Yet as always, the simple townies went about their lives, especially the lone proprietor of Sugarcube Corner. For the first few weeks after discovering her husband’s adulterous ways, Cup Cake had been in something of a depressive haze, barely able to perform her daily routines at both home and work. There were neighbors who offered their sympathies and support, which helped her get out of the worst of it. But it was trying times: the bakery was short two industrious workers, which put a hamper on the production of confectionary delights. Not to mention the gnawing hole that lingered in her heart from such devastating betrayal. Nevertheless, there was a business to run and two hungry mouths to feed, so she sucked it up and continued on with her profession, always making sure to give her customers a smile.

With the lunch rush well past, the pudgy blue mare set about tidying the store and restocking for the impending school crowd. As she neatly placed the final cupcake into the glass display of the sales counter, the tingling of the storefront bell announced a new customer. Looking up, she was surprised to see none other than Ponyville’s resident princess, Twilight Sparkle. Though it was the same pony she’d known for years, Cup Cake never completely got used to the added wings and royal title. But those middling concerns were absent as she made a genuine smile at the young alicorn.

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Cake,” Twilight greeted with a smile of her own.

“Hello there, Twilight. Good afternoon to you as well.” Although Twilight in a way had brought her husband’s infidelity to light, Cup never harbored any ill feelings to the studious mare, so all her greetings remained warm and welcoming. “Been keeping busy as of late?”

“Not so much. Official duties have been very slow lately, but that’s bound to change when the holidays roll around. Speaking of which, the reason for my stopping by is that I wish to perform a random health inspection.”

“Health inspection?” Cup asked, a little dumbfounded.

“As your business involves the handling of consumables for mass distribution, it’s important that health and safety practices are upheld to the letter to avoid endangerment to both employees and the public at large.” Twilight finished her serious talk and softened back into her casual tone. “I’ve been reading up on mandatory business monitoring practices and thought I’d try my hoof at it, just to get a better understanding of what goes on. Past inspection records show Sugarcube Corner as having straight A ratings, so this should make for an easy practice run to help apply what I’ve just learned. Nothing like a little field work to really drive it home.”

“Oh, okay. Sure, Twilight, if you want to give it a try,” Cup Cake acceded.

“Good! Now this being a cursory inspection, I’ll just skip over the boring questionnaire and get right down to the main inspection.” Twilight trotted up to and past the sales counter. “I’ll start with the food preparation area, and make my way out to the sales floor. I ask that you stay out here so as not to interfere with the inspection.” Twilight giggled. “Don’t worry, I won’t move anything around. Just a quick look over the key areas. Be right back.”

With that the alicorn trotted into the back area of the building, leaving a bemused Cup Cake. Quite strange for the young mare to take an interest in something so dull and bureaucratic, but then again that’s typical Twilight, Cup mentally remarked. Hardly a minute passed before the sound of a surprised gasp reached the baker’s ears.

“Mrs. Cake, I really think you should come have a look at this.”

The grave turn in Twilight’s voice instantly raised Cup’s concern, and without hesitation she headed for the kitchen. Past the swinging doors, she was about to ask Twilight what had happened, when her whole body and mind stopped. At the other end of the preparation area near the back door, Twilight stood beside the lanky yellow form of Cup Cake’s estranged husband. He had a meek smile, with dark spots under his eyes and his face recently shaven. Cup only stood and stared as Twilight spoke up.

“Sorry for the deception, but I thought that the back door would make less of a scene.”

“Hello, Cuppa,” Carrot waved to his stunned wife. The initial shock quickly wore off, and Cup Cake immediately took on a more aggravated expression.

“What is he doing here? What’s the meaning of this?”

“I say there’s some unresolved issues that need to be dealt with between you and your husband that’s been left unaddressed for too long,” Twilight answered.

The side of Cup’s mouth twitched. “He’s no husband of mine.”

“Actually, he still very much is,” Twilight corrected firmly. “Although you did kick him out, you never officially filed for divorce. But if you wish, I can summon up the necessary paperwork that you both can fill out and which I can have notarized, being the highest legal authority here. All I ask is that you and Mr. Cake talk things out before you make that decision.”

Carrot gawked at Twilight as though he were hoodwinked, but Cup Cake still looked miff. Although, five months of adjusting had tempered her inner wrath… to an extent.

“Alright. I’ll talk… for five minutes,” she sternly said.

“Very well,” Twilight nodded before turning for the door. “I’ll just wait outside while you discuss things. Give me a yell if you still want that divorce arranged.”

Twilight opened the back door with her magic and stepped outside. Closing the door gently, she looked to the other five mares gathered around.

“Now all we do is wait and hope for the best,” she announced.

“Not really seeing the point of all of us coming along if all we’re doing is sneaking him through the back,” Rainbow griped. “We did say we would all help him out. You did pretty much all the work.”

“The last time we all got involved, we put unnecessary strain onto an already delicate matter,” Twilight reminded. “This time around, we’re just going to stay put and let it run its course, for good or bad. But if it makes you feel any better, if things should get catastrophically out of hoof, we can do peacekeeping.”

“Aw yeah, now you’re talkin’!”

“Rainbow, that’s not something to hope for,” Rarity chided.

“I hope they get back together,” Pinkie bemoaned. “It would just be horrible for all of this to wind up crashing and burning and making it worse for everypony.”

“I’m sure they’ll talk it through,” Fluttershy assured her bulbous friend. “As the saying goes: absence makes the heart grow fonder. Right now, I bet they’re enjoying the simple joy of seeing one another again.”

Back inside, the air simmered with the heat of Cup Cake’s leveled glare toward her husband. Carrot figured that talking would come naturally, but as he shifted his eyes around, he scrambled internally for something to break through the awkwardness that had beset them. Since stalling would do neither of them good, he went for broke.

“Do you... want to sit down?”

“Sure.”

After the curt response, the two ponies went over to the dining table and pulled up their own chairs. Once seated, they went back to exchanging unfriendly looks (at least from Cup’s end).

“You wanted to talk. So talk,” Cup said flatly, crossing her forelimbs over her chest.

“Oh, um, yeah. Uhh, I just got back into town the other day. Umm, you look nice.” A pause. “How are the kids?”

“They’re fine, though I don’t see how they’re any of your business since you went and started making more on your own,” was the harsh response. “I take it you’re back because luck with the floozies hasn’t been going well.”

“It’s-it’s nothing like that.”

“Then I suppose you’re trying to wrangle Twilight into getting me to give up one of the kids to pair up with the one you have coming. Well hear this, you son of a bitch, I’m not letting either one of them—”

“That’s not what this is about, Cuppa!”

“Don’t you call me by that name, you lying snake!”

Carrot found himself half-raised from his seat, and quickly sat back down and readjusted his tone. “I didn’t come here to start up any of that nonsense. I only wanted to clear things up.”

“Like what? How you slept with our employee, got her pregnant, let everypony believe some random pony raped her, or how you never told me the truth until it got too hot to handle, but only when our closest friends happened to be in the same room to hear it.”

“I never told her to say she was raped: that was a huge misunderstanding! But the rest… were solely my mistakes, I won’t deny it. But I want to better explain myself, since I never got the chance to.”

“Okay, then let’s start at the top: why did you do it? She’s lived with us for so many years; I had long thought you were above that.”

“So did I. She was like the daughter we never had… no, that came out wrong. But I never had romantic feelings for her, I swear. It just… sprung up on me.”

“Sprung up?” Cup asked, cocking an eyebrow. “Maybe for the first time, but I remember you saying it had been more. Were those sprung upon you, too?”

“No. Those were strictly my doing.” Carrot averted his gaze upon saying that.

“Still no answer as to why you went through with it. Was it because I’m no longer attractive? That sex with me had become grotesque, so you do it with somepony more tolerable to keep your heads straight?”

“No, no, not at all. I still find you beautiful, and I could just swim in those flanks forever. I could never find you grotesque. It’s just…”

“Yes?”

“...I felt like… the passion had gone out of our marriage.” Before Cup could respond, Carrot quickly continued. “Remember how we started? It was more lively, exciting, passionate. But then it petered out and became… dull. All run-of-the-mill.”

“Of course it would: we grew up, made a family,” Cup said bluntly. “We can’t stay young and reckless forever. But you seemed to have forgotten that, or refused to accept it.”

“I knew that very well. That’s why I couldn’t fully enjoy those times I had with Pinkie. There was pleasure, I won’t lie, but it was more out of stress relief. Nothing like the times we shared. Nowhere as meaningful.”

“I see: go to the younger mare to keep married life exciting without telling your wife. That’s a very reasonable way of handling ‘stress’,” Cup scoffed.

“I had wanted to tell you about my concerns. About how things had become too predictable and routine.”

“So why didn’t you do that instead of knocking up our boarder?” Cup furrowed her eyebrows.

“You seemed alright with how things were. You didn’t seem brought down by domesticated life like I was, so I figured what was the point of bringing up my own insignificant prob—”

“Bullshit!” Cup’s hoof slammed onto the table to punctuate her shout. “When we took our vows, that meant we could confide in one another about our troubles, that we could seek each other for help. Marriage is about trust and helping and receiving help from your partner. There were times I came to you for help, and there were definitely times you did the same with me. So what made this one different? Why couldn’t you have talked to me about this and let me help you? Why, Carrot? Why?”

“I was afraid, okay!” The outburst halted Cup Cake’s badgering as she looked wide-eyed at Carrot. “Here I was with this wonderful life that so many desperate stallions could only dream of, yet I wasn’t feeling satisfied with it. If I complained about it, what did that say about me? Like it’d be acknowledging that I made some kind of mistake that I’m just now regretting, which I damn well won’t ever accept! And if I had told you about it, what if it couldn’t be fixed? What if I continued feeling unsatisfied, no matter how hard you tried to help me? Then you’d be stuck with an unsatisfied husband and start growing resentful, and that would make me grow resentful as well. And our kids would wind up being caught in the middle as our happy home slowly withered and died!”

Carrot took a few haggard breaths. “I never, ever want to hate you, Cup. I never want to do or say anything that would ruin the life we made, and I thought that my worries were something that couldn’t be fixed. I felt so afraid each time I thought of telling you, how it would go all wrong. Each time I considered doing it, I turned to Pinkie instead. It distracted me from those worries, so that I would never acknowledge that our marriage was flawed in some fundamental way. But now… I’ve proven it by screwing up Pinkie’s life, as well as ours…”

A deep pause hung over the two, before Cup Cake said, “Did you think so little of me… of your own wife… Did you really have that little faith in the strength of our marriage?”

Carrot dropped his head, letting the passing seconds of silence weigh heavily on his pending response.

“I allowed doubt to take me over,” he finally said, solemnly. “For that, I wound up messing up things more than if I had simply talked it over with you. But, now all I want to do is fix it up as best as I can.” He took a deep breath. “Everything may be beyond fixing, and for good reason. But the fact remains that Pinkie is carrying my foal on her own, and Pound and Pumpkin are without a father. I don’t want them to bear the burden of my own stupidity and mistakes, to be ridiculed by everypony because I abandoned them. I want to support them, to see they have as normal and happy a life as possible. I don’t want to take them away from you, but I don’t want to be gone either. I may have failed as a husband, but I still want to be a good father. Please… whatever you want, just let me stay a part of their lives.”

Another heavy silence, only now rife with sorrow and uncertainty. Cup’s indignation and anger had tempered a good deal since the stallion began saying his peace, and was more full of thoughts than actual responses to his plea. But after nearly a minute of stillness, something came to her lips.

“Say if I were to take you back… how will I be able to trust you again?”

Carrot delayed his answer for some seconds, looking at his hooves on the tabletop. “I guess there’s really no guarantee. I can tell you this won’t happen again. That I’ll always come to you for help, like I should’ve. But, it all falls down to… whether you will believe me or not.”

More silence between the two Cakes, as Cup mulled over the options and Carrot awaited his sentence. Then…

“After what you did, it will be difficult to just take your word,” Cup said softly, with a twinge of remorse. “That you would commit adultery instead of just talking to me… that’s not something you can wave off. I may never be able to look at you as the same stallion I fell in love with, and whom I’ve lived with for so many years.”

Carrot looked to the side, his eyes beginning to water as his chest grew heavy.

“With that said,” Cup resumed. “I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t missed you to some degree.” Carrot looked up, a little surprised. “We have been together for so long, that having you gone made my days feel… incomplete. You talked about things becoming routine, and you being around was part of my own happy routine. I’ve been hard-pressed to find something to replace it, and besides, nopony looks at me the same way as you do. There was a noticeable void when I no longer got that unique sort of attention you gave to me.”

She paused a moment, then looked directly into Carrot’s eyes. “It may be a very long time before I can fully trust you again, if ever. But as you said, the children shouldn’t have to suffer. And they’ve really missed their father.”

The corner’s of Carrot’s muzzle stretched slightly into a humble smile, his head rising up some more as the oppressive weight on his heart all but disappeared. Cup Cake gave her own smile in return, her eyes softening at seeing that comforting expression on the stallion’s face once more.

“And it wouldn’t be right to let Pinkie have her foal without a warm home and some proper guidance,” she added.

“You’re okay with Pinkie Pie?” Carrot asked, a bit amazed.

“I can’t really stay mad at the poor girl. She can be obnoxious at times, and cause her share of trouble. I should be more infuriated at her for sleeping with my husband, but if you’re wanting to make amends, I don’t see why she can’t as well. Pound and Pumpkin have missed her immensely as well, and it’d be nice for them to have a playmate that’s more their age.”

“Cup… thank you,” Carrot said graciously.

“It’s mainly for the children, as you put it. The other issues will be dealt with as time goes on, but for now… we might be able to work something out.”

Back outside, Pinkie removed her ear from the cup placed against the back door and looked to the others.

“They’re gonna work it out!” she exclaimed in her attempt at a whisper, which raised a quiet cheer from her friends. It ended quickly as the door opened, signaling the others except Twilight to duck out of sight as Cup Cake stepped out.

“We’ve come to a decision not to file for divorce, Twilight,” she said to the alicorn. “However, we would still like to talk to you about some things. As well as Pinkie Pie.”

With a yip the pink, gravid mare popped out from her hiding place and went up to her smiling friend and the matronly mare.

“Nice to see you again, Pinkie,” Cup greeted.

“Yep, same to you!” Pinkie beamed right back.

“The pregnancy seems to be going along nicely,” Cup commented after looking over Pinkie’s enlarged features.

“That it is!”

“Hmhm. Now, if you two will just come inside.” As the two mares entered, Cup leaned out and said, “The rest of you can come in the front and wait there, if you want. Better than standing out here where it’s damp, I say.”

After the door closed, the remaining four mares stepped out from their hiding spot, looking a little bemused.

“We’re that obvious, huh,” Rainbow dumbly remarked.

“Eeyup,” was the affirmative from the farm pony.

Golden

So ended one of the most strenuous domestic quandaries in Ponyville’s history. The Cake couple of Carrot and Cup chose not to officially divorce, but they made use of Twilight Sparkle’s precedence by writing up a binding legal obligation for Carrot Cake to provide full financial and housing support for his illegitimate child and said child’s mother, essentially making him fully responsible for the welfare of both parties until such time that the mother can support herself and her child independently. Should he decide to run off again, the full weight of the law would come bearing down on him, swiftly and without mercy.

Naturally this was quite agreeable to everypony involved, as it meant Pinkie could move back in to Sugarcube Corner to solve the housing matter, much to her immense delight. Cup Cake forgave Pinkie for her hoof in infidelity, who in turn apologized profusely at every opportunity in the first week since returning to her old home. The Cake twins were especially overjoyed to have their father and favorite auntie back, and thus the slow process of marital healing began. Though the lost trust made things between Carrot and Cup lukewarm, the overall mood of the bakery brightened up considerably due to once again being fully staffed with the same familiar faces.

Ponyville’s citizens were quick to notice the change, and upon learning of owners’ resolved quarrel, their collective moods improved as well. And seeing how Pinkie Pie was accepted back into their household, they slowly began to warm back up to the party mare, and in time their opinions of her steadily grew more favorable. There was even well-wishing and help from some of the neighbors in regards to the upcoming birth, though none could match the expertise in foal-rearing as that of the Cakes.

Autumn ended and winter came, and some weeks before Winter Wrap-up, the big day had finally arrived. Weeks of anticipation and unbearable cramping led to an exciting rush to Ponyville Hospital and several tense hours of labor. Though there was a shocking amount of cursing from the mother, with patience and help from old reliable morphine the delivery went by without complication, and a healthy earth colt was born into the world. The Cakes, the Harmony Bearers, and a very weary and doped-out Pinkie Pie gazed down upon a squirming bundle of joy, that sported a darkened yellow coat, with a few small brown patches around the flank and forelegs. His tiny eyes were heavy aquamarine, and his tail and mane coloration composed of both brown and orange streaks. His mane also had the unfortunate puffy aspect as his mother’s, but you couldn’t deny its adorability. Pinkie named him Marble, both after her grandfather and for the interesting swirl of colors in his mane.

Thus Marble Cake was welcomed into the Cake household and Ponyville at large with open hooves. And as Rarity predicted, Pinkie Pie’s baby weight went away in no time and she was back to her usual outgoing, bouncy, hyper self… well, for the most part. Motherhood does have that effect of reigning in the freest of spirits, after all. But Pinkie remained chipper and fun-loving where it counted, while also taking to her newfound motherly responsibilities with proper seriousness. As ponies sought her for parties after many months of avoiding her, she often brought her little giggle bug for inspiration, as well as win the hearts of everypony in town and the envy of plenty of young, single mares.

True to his word, Carrot was there every step of the way for his son. Since Marble’s birth he had helped in caring for him as he did with his other two children, and gave as much unconditional love and attention to him as well. However, the relation between Carrot and Pinkie remained strictly platonic as before, give or take a few passing snuggles. But only out of the love that comes with parenting, and nothing else.

Though unsure what to make of the new arrival at first, Pound and Pumpkin soon became giddy at having a younger brother they could play with and show the ropes in how to excel at infancy. Yet, Marble seemed to take to being a babbling foal pretty well, achieving motion and inquisitive troublemaking in only a month’s time. Then again, what else would you expect from the son of Pinkie Pie?

And so was the way normality held sway over the humble hamlet of Ponyville once more, and there was no better example of it than on one particularly normal day in late spring, more than a year since this tale of familial distress and restoration began. Carrot and Cup Cake had left with their two children to tend to some shopping down at the market, leaving Pinkie Pie in charge of Sugarcube Corner. As the lunch rush had ended, she took the opportunity to do some recreational baking, merrily mixing up some ingredients in the kitchen area while her bouncy ragamuffin watched on in rapt attention from his tabletop seat (as rapt as a baby’s attention can be, anyway).

Pinkie was alternating between stirring up her mixing bowl and booping Marble’s noise when the familiar jangle announced a customer. Moving a few paces on her hind legs, not once stopping her stirring, Pinkie leaned out into the store area and instantly spotted a somewhat scrawny grey pegasus colt with a black mane.

“Hiya there, Rumble!” she called out, catching the colt by surprise. “How are ya, little guy?”

“Uh, I’m fine,” he humbly said. “Just came in here for a cookie.”

“Sure thing! Just give me a sec and I’ll be right out!” And instantly the mare had popped back into the kitchen, out of sight but still yelling out a conversation. “So how are ya enjoyin’ the spring break? I’m surprised not more of your classmates have come in here.”

“Yeah, most of them are out at other places, or camping and stuff.” Feeling a touch of curiosity, Rumble wandered over past the counter and peeked into the kitchen, seeing Pinkie Pie humming and stirring happily to her son’s giggling approval. “Whatcha making?”

“Oh, this?” Pinkie asked, abruptly stopping her stirring as she looked to the intruding pegasus. “Just mixing me up some treacle tarts.”

“Tree-acle?” Rumble said, tilting his head.

“It’s this really sweet kind of syrup,” Pinkie happily explained. “One of Mrs. Cake’s relatives lives in Trottingham and sent over a whole box of them a few days ago. It’s supposed to be great for baking, so I thought I’d give it a try!” She went back to stirring and humming with that winning smile of hers.

“Oh, I see. That’s pretty cool I guess.”

“Hey! I just thought of something neat: how bout I show you how to make it? Give you some culinary practice which you can use to impress the ladies~.”

“Ewww, I’m too young for that stuff,” Rumble objected with a hint of a blush on his little cheeks.

“Trust me, Rumble: fillies like a colt of many skills, and you’ll be grateful for having them when you get older. So whaddya say? Some fun-time baking with your pally-pal Pinkie Pie?” Pinkie cocked her head lifted her eyebrows a few times to better sell her angle.

“Well... okay.” The pitchmare does it again!

“Great! Just come over here and I’ll show you the ingredients that are used, and how to properly stir them into a scrumptious-yumptious mixture. And there’s enough so that we could make one you can take home to your brother, as an apology for that little mix-up I got him into last year.”

“Uhh, I think he’s well over it,” he said as he approached his sudden mentor-for-the-day.

“But you can never pass up free desserrrrrrt! Now let’s get to it.”

With apprentice in tow, and the cutest little critic watching on with glee, Pinkie Pie continued stirring up her treacle-laced concoction. A sweet treat for a cozy day in a very sweet life; none too shabby an arrangement, all things considered.

The End

Author's Note

And that was my foray into the realm of domestic drama. An idea that came up sometime between seasons two and three, though I'd never thought I'd ever write it up. But because I felt especially inspired and found no other stories like this, I went through with it. Thanks to all of you who read this and kept reading it to the end, and apologies to the non-clop lovers for the opening chapter, as well as the clop-lovers left disappointed by everything after the first chapter. A Happy 2015 to you all, and all the best.

Songs That Helped In Composing This Story

Tabi no Tochuu - Spice & Wolf OST
+ID - Megurine Luka
Lonely UFO - Hatsune Miku
Isolation Thanatos - Kagamine Rin
You'll Never be a Man - Elvis Costello
Catastrophe - Hatsune Miku & Yuzuki Yukari
The Show Must Go On - Queen

*An eclectic and random mix, sure, but my thinking's weird like that :P*