What Alicorns Do To Pass The Time
Long past a normal pony’s bedtime a curtain lavender alicorn was sat in front of her desk in her bedroom, within a dark room. The only light source came from the computer screen in front of her on the desk, where she was currently looking at errotic images, which involved the mythical creatures known as homo sapiens and ponies doing sexy things to each other.
"Awww yeah! Time to--" her eyes widen in shock when she saw a popup image of a morbidly obese, pale skinned human, that wore a light blue muumuu along with a dark blue wizard’s hat, which was covered in stars, he also wore a fake, long, greek philosopher like white beard, whilst he held a wooden staff with a purple diamond on its tip, below it said in bright red text ‘My World of Haycraft character’.
"Oh my, he’s so sexy!" she said whilst rubbing a hoof over her marehood and moaning sexfully. "What game is this?"
Twilight always had a bit of a fat neckbeard fetish, thus she opened the image, which led her a website called World of Haycraft, with a list of guidelines on the page.
"I'm not reading all that crap!" Thus the impatient pony princess skipped to the bottom of the guidelines and clicked ‘Agree’, which downloaded a file, that took only one second, which then automatically opened leading her to a character design page with lots of tools at her disposal. "Hmm, this looks interesting." she said with a hoof to her chin thoughtfully.
Twilight looked through the list of ‘good races’, which were; humans, dwarves, elves, earth ponies and unicorns. She clicked below to see the ‘evil races’, which were; orcs, Illithidbergs, trolls and draugr.
Since Twilight was a good pony, she naturally chose to be a female unicorn, that were great mages, but lacked the close combat skills nor endurance of a dwarf or earth pony. Her unicorn look a lot like her, which she named Sparkle Light. Twilight through real life experience, chose to be a multiclass mage/thief, so she could use powerful pony magic and well as the deadly arts of stealth.
Now with her character created, she clicked enter world at the bottom of the screen. The loading only took about a few seconds, Twilight’s character was on screen Sparkle Light, who was standing in the middle of a foggy swampland. On the top left corner of the screen it showed a portrait of Sparkle Light, displaying her level, which is level 1, and there is a red bar on the left and a blue bar on the right next to her portrait. At the bottom of the screen it showed the interface which has such options as; Attack Bar, she only knew 3 attacks the rest of the 40 small grey squares are blank. And more options like guest book, messages, inventory, index and other stuff.
“What the fuck am I supposed to do?“ said Sparkle Light in Twilight's voice.
Suddenly a level 450 dwarf walked past her, who held a fiery battle axe, that wore red and black spiky heavily plated armor with a horned spiky helmet.
“Hey you?!“
“Rrra, what do you want noob?“ he said in a deep manly voice.
“What am I meant to do?“
“Find a few quests off NPCs or kill toads for awhile till you get to level 5, so you can leave the swamp.“
“Oh, thank you.“
“You’re welcome,“ he said as he walked through Sparkle Light as if she was transparent.
Just then, a big yellow toad had conveniently jumped out of a dirty swamp pool.
“Aha!“ Twilight put the sword cursor over the toad then clicked on it showing the Toad's portrait on the right, which has its own red bar on the left and blue bar on the right next to it's portrait.
“Die filth!“ Sparkle Light charged at the toad, stabbing it with her horn, which inflicted 25 damage off it as shown above it's head, also showing its red bar going down a slight bit.
The toad retaliated by head butting Sparkle Light, which took 5 damage off her, which caused Sparkle Light’s red bar to go down a slight bit. Sparkle Light raised her front hooves to kick the toad in the face, which caused 10 damage to it. The Toad spat green slime on Sparkle Light, that inflicted 35 damage on her, yet at the same time the toad’s blue bar dropped slightly.
“Oh you cheeky bastard!“
Twilight clicked one of the icons in the attack bar, which made Sparkle Light fire a lightning bolt from her horn, that took 50 damage off the toad, which made it fall over and die, earning her 15 XP. Twilight took note as that her blue bar had gone down a slight bit, and also showed that the attack button below has a 5 seconds recharge rate.
"Alright I killed it!“
Twilight put the cursor over the toad, which turned into a hand, then clicked on it to see the loot it dropped was, ‘green slime’, which has a value of 1 gold and a ‘rough leather saddle’ that had a value of 5 gold and an iron helmet, value of 5 gold. She could not wear the helmet, because she wasn’t the right class to wear it.
Twilight took the three items, which caused the toad's body to fade away in seconds.
She shrugged, then opened her inventory and equipped the saddle, which just appeared over Sparkle Light’s body like magic.
"No animation to put them on eh? Alright then, time to kill more toads."
Twilight heard a sword slashing sound behind her, she turned around and saw a level 15 human warrior, who was dressed in iron armor fighting a large level 15 toad with a claymore. Twilight assisted the human by firing a lightning bolt from her horn at the toad, which only took 2 damage off it.
"I really need to get stronger." The human with a mighty swing of his sword cut the head off the toad. Unfortunately, she earned no XP from helping the human.
"Awww," she said sadly.
She clicked the the second icon below, which caused Sparkle Light to crouch down and her body turned ghost like. "Cool! This must be stealth!"
She then sneakily moved off into the distance.
***
There was a toad next to a muddy pool, Sparkle Light sneaked up from behind the toad, she backstabbed and took 150 damage off the Toad, killing it instantly. However, she was no longer in stealth.
"Awww yeah! I’ll be rich in no time!" she looted the toad's corpse, to see it has dropped ‘Green Slime’.
And then Twilight had then spent the next hour wandering the swamp killing low leveled toads and avoiding big level 15 toads.
***
Several hours later, Twilight with her badly bloodshot eyes was still sat in front of her computer with cups of coffee and energy drinks lazily tossed on the floor.
With a powerful blast from her horn a toad was killed and earned her 15 XP and got her to level 5.
"Yes! Finally, after five hours, I’m level 5!"
In the distance a level 455 red dragon flew down from the sky to land in front of a group of low leveled players, who then breathe fire setting trees and low level terrified players alight, killing them all instantly.
"Dragons?!"
For safety went into stealth, but that did not stop a blue dragon to fly down in front of Sparkle Light. The dragon sniffed the air with a question mark popping above it's head, then it growls before turning with an exclamation mark popping above it's head.
"Oh crap!!
The dragon breathe a blizzard, which froze Sparkle Light solid and inflicted 24000 damage. Text pops up on screen saying "Would you like to respawn?" Sparkle Light clicked on it.
She suddenly found herself at a spawn point in the middle of a small stonehenge like ruin accompanied by many other players.
"Stupid dragons!"
***
A short time later, we see Sparkle Light trotting through a snowy pine wood forest along a dirt path, past a mossy gravestone marked in black "Rest In Peace Minsc And Boo". Suddenly an old long gray bearded man wore a blue hooded robe approached the path.
"Who are you?"
"I'm am Jimbob, one of the long lost wizards of the Great Long Grey Beards!" he spoke a in deep voice like gandalf.
"Wow!"
"Yes, now I need you to climb that mountain over there. "He pointed to a mountain three times taller than Mount Everest.
"Ah horseapples!"
"Then enter a cave at it's peak, then gather me a set of five Khazad Mushrooms within the cave, then return to me here.
"Got it. I'll be on my---
"Be careful as you go up the mountain, there are giants up there."
"Ahh, dammit!"
Sparkle Light began to climb the massive mountain. After about an hour she finally made it to the peak of the mountain.
"I made it!" There is a loud roar. "What the?!"
A huge; 20 foot tall, one eyed, bald headed giant with a big gray beard wearing bear mammoth fur had saw Sparkle Light and was charging at her with a huge crude wooden club.
"Me no like you, me crush you now!" roared the giant as he swung his club, which hit Sparkle Light, that sent her flying into the air above the clouds screaming.
In her next respawn she went back up the mountain again. This time she manages to avoided the giant using stealth and got inside a limestone cave.
She sneaked her way through the cave, avoiding awaking giants within the cave, who were sleep on the ground. She picked up several large blue mushrooms, then exited the cave, followed by jumping off the mountain to save time.
In her next respawn, she made her way back to Jimbob and handed him the Khazad Mushrooms
"Good, now I want you to climb all the way up the mountain again, and go get me my favorite pair of slippers which I forgot to tell you about, that I left in the cave when I was there last, where you found the mushrooms."
Sparkle Light sighed, then made her way back over to the mountain again.
Sparkle Light reached the top of the mountain once again, once atop she used stealth to sneak her way into the cave to pick up a pair of slippers, that were just inside a wooden crate at the entrance.
And then she trotted back outside and jumped off the mountain.
In her next respawn, she gave Jimbob his slippers.
"Good, now I want you to climb all the way up the mountain again, and---
"Ah, screw you! I'm doing some other quests!
She trotted off.
***
A short time later, deep in a forest Twilight was sneaking up behind on a boar, which she proceeded to stab in the back, and kill it instantly.
Twilight’s ears twitched when she heard the door open behind her.
"Uh, Twilight--
"Go away Spike! I have another seventy four thousand boars to kill before I’m allowed to go to a player vs player area and get humans to mount me into battle!" she shouted angrily.
Spike slowly walked out of the room. Seconds later Pinkie Pie trotted in and jumped wildly about the room.
"Hey, Twilight! Whatcha playing?!
"Fuck off, Pinkie Pie! I’m playing World of Haycraft!"
"No! You’re going to waste your life!"
"Hah, I’m an alicorn! So I’m fucking immortal bitch!"
"Oh, OK. Want to hang out?"
"No! Go away!"
Pinkie Pie with her head down low had sadly walked out of the room with tears in her eyes. No sooner had she left than no other than Princess Celestia had walked in.
"Twilight, you must stop playing World of Haycraft!"
"But it’s such a great game!"
"No it’s not! It’s a grind fest and a life waster! I know, I used to play MMORPGs myself!" a single tear fell from down her cheek." I still do! But, I only limit myself to six hours a day now, so I don’t completely destroy my social life."
"I can’t it’s too good!"
"But you can’t just abandon your friends."
"Hmm, I got an idea!"
***
Ten thousand years later.
"Ok, now this game is getting boring."
There was beeping sound, followed by her five friends and Spike stepping out of cryogenic freezer pods.
"Yay! Now Twilight can have a social life!" said Pinkie Pie.
And then everything went back to normal and nothing really had changed in the last ten thousand years because Equestria was a very stagnated society.
The End
