A New World, The Same Way

Chapters

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3

Chapter 1

Veilstone City.

An isolated city high up in the northwest of Sinnoh’s main landmass. Despite this solitude and seclusion, the city is a hub of capitalism and enterprise, filled with Game Corners, department stores, a lucrative shipping industry, and major tourism centered on the varying meteorites dotting the landscape the community was founded around. This, plus the presence of Sinnoh’s Fighting-Type Gym, makes the lonely city a bustling hub of commerce.

Of course, like all major metropolises, for all the positive aspects, there will always be dark sides.

This dark side was particularly well known to a man known as Johnny.

Johnny was a member of a gang in Veilstone known as the Muscleheads, a band of smugglers and narcotic-dealers who specialized in peddling performance-enhancing substances to trainers who wanted their Pokemon strong enough to take the local Gym Leader and her team head on. It was an extremely financially beneficial business. Notoriously illegal, but beneficial.

Johnny was a dealer for the Muscleheads, distributing their product to whoever had the money to buy. He was so used to dealing with people who were more bicep than brain by this point that barely anyone could phase him.

Currently, Johnny was about ten seconds away from absolutely pissing himself as he ran down an alleyway, scrambling to work a Pokeball out of his belt and toss it over his shoulder as he fled for his life.

“Close Combat! CLOSE COMBAT!” He screamed desperately, not even checking to see that the order had registered before reaching the end of the alleyway and ramming his shoulder into the door to the warehouse, bursting through it before slamming it shut and locking as many of the deadbolts and latches on it as he could reach.

He then almost shrieked in terror when a hand fell on his shoulder, prompting him to twist around fearfully.

“Whoa, hey, chill!” The large man who’d touched him raised his hands in surrender, he and the two other goons behind him backing away from the crazed individual. “Jeeze, Johnny, what’s up? You look like you’ve got a Mismagius on your tale or somethin’.”

Johnny panted frantically as he got his wits about him before jabbing his finger behind him towards the door. “B-B-Bruce! I-it’s him, Bruce, it’s that-that-that thing! It found me! It found me, it followed me here! W-we gotta get out of here before the rest of them show up!”

Bruce frowned in confusion. “Johnny, what the hell are you-?” His expression morphed into one of pure horror as he put the pieces together. “Wait... by ‘him’, you don’t mean-?”

“It’s the Gentleman!” Johnny hissed agitatedly. “The Gentleman sicked that damn behemoth of his on me! We need to pack up and get out here before-!”

“Before what!?” Bruce demanded furiously. “It’s already over! You said it yourself, that thing’s hot on your trail and he can’t be far behind!”

“Hey, don’t worry!” Johnny defended hastily. “I-I set Primeape on him! With any luck, that thing didn’t tell its master where he was going and we’ll have time to get out of here before he comes looking!”

“You think that your Primeape, let alone any Pokemon, can last more than three seconds against that thing!?” Bruce sputtered incredulously.

Johnny allowed himself a shaky smile. “H-hey, don’t worry about it! I told him to use Close Combat, it’s probably down by now! I mean, come on, Primeape’s a Fighting-Type, and that thing’s-!”

CRASH!

The drug peddlers jumped in fear and stared in horror at the unconscious and thoroughly beaten Primeape that had been thrown through the wall and was imbedded in a nearby cargo container.

“Called a monster for a reason...” Bruce muttered, fumbling to unclip one of his Pokeballs from his belt, a motion that was imitated by the others behind him...

“GYAH!”

Until one of them suddenly collapsed in pain, clutching his knee in agony. “FUUUCK!” He screamed, rocking back and forth as he clutched the undamaged part of his anatomy. “MY KNEE! S-SOMETHING’S IN MY KNEE!”

Johnny made to help him, but was held back by Bruce. “Don’t bother,” The larger man breathed. “He’s a dead man either way.”

Johnny made to protest... but was cut off by something whipping out of the shadows of the warehouse, wrapping around the man’s leg and yanking him into the darkness, his scream dying off within instants.

“Oh fuck me...” Johnny breathed in horror.

The other goon stumbled backwards, shaking his head frantically. “No... just... hell no! Screw you guys, I’m out of- WAGH!”

Whatever he was about to say net was lost in a shriek of fear when something small and pitch black leapt out of the shadows, onto his body and began to maul him like a wet Meowth.

“GET IT OFF!” He shrieked, stumbling around blindly as he fought to dislodge the creature. “FOR THE LOVE OF DIALGA, GET IT O-ACK!” He was cut off by the same something as last time whipping around his neck and dragging him away.

“We’re dead.” Bruce decided flatly.

Johnny swallowed heavily as he glanced around fearfully. “M-maybe we can make a break for it? Get out before they-?”

Once anew, he was interrupted. This time by the loud sound of something retching violently and a wave of an absolutely horrendous-smelling liquid flooding across the floor.

Bruce and Johnny gagged as the fumes emanating from the toxic concoction hit their noses. “S-sludge Wave!” Bruce wheezed.

“We gotta get out of here!” Johnny coughed, running towards the hole his Primeape had created as it forcibly entered the warehouse, sparing a moment to flash his Pokeball and return said simian to its container.

Once outside, he and Bruce collapsed to their knees, coughing and hacking miserably as they tried to clear their lungs.

“W-what do we do now...?” Johnny moaned.

Bruce made to respond...

“Now?”

But was halted by something pressing itself into the bottom of his chin and forcefully directing his head upwards.

Slowly, fearfully, the pair tilted their heads back and observed the person standing before them.

He was a relatively tall man, most of his form enshrouded by shadows, save for the black-gloved hand that was clutching the cane pressed into Bruce’s jaw. Flanking the man were six inhuman figures of varying sizes that were watching them apathetically.

“Now you pay the price.” The man stated, his voice the height of etiquette, prim and proper.

Johnny swallowed heavily, fighting to keep himself from pissing his pants. “W-wait, please-!” He begged.

“‘Please’?” The man tilted his head to the side questioningly as he regarded the pair like he would a particularly repugnant Bug-Type. “My dear boy, you’ve broken the rules that I enforce in this dear city of mine. That crime alone guarantees the lack of any and all mercy in your treatment. ‘Please’ has no place in this conversation whatsoever. Actually, on second thought, I’d prefer not to waste words on either of you at all. Good night.”

“Nononowai-!”

THWACK! THUNK!

Whatever Johnny was about to say morphed into a moan as the man whipped the cane up and swiftly clubbed the pair in the head, leaving them to moan pitifully as they slipped into unconsciousness.

The man sniffed disdainfully as he brought his cane up and began to wipe off its end. “Filthy barbarians...” He then began to regard the warehouse they’d burst out of. He glanced at one of the figures behind him out of the corner of his eye. “It’s empty?”

One of the figures grunted in a positive-sounding manner.

“Good.” He turned around and began to walk out of the alleyway. “Burn it to the ground.”

All but one of the figures followed him, the last taking a moment to rear his head back and then whipped it forwards, unleashing a massive plume of flames that cascaded into the warehouse. The figure followed behind its comrades once it was certain that the warehouse was well and truly ablaze.

The group walked away, leaving the building to burn steadily into the night.

-o-

Officer Jenny growled furiously as she observed the smoldering ashes of what had once been a warehouse, impatiently tapping her foot on the ground as firefighters, investigators and their Pokemon investigated the scene.

‘Come on, come on, where is she...’ She thought agitatedly, snapping her head back and forth as she searched the streets for a certain individual.

Finally, she was rewarded when she caught sight of the person she was waiting for stumbling around the corner.

‘Finally!’ She thought in exasperation, running up to the person. “Maylene! What took you so long!?”

“Je-nnyyy...” The bathrobe-clad Gym Leader moaned pitifully, blearily rubbing her eyes, which were half-closed with exhaustion. “Why did you call me? It’s three o’clock in the morning! I was sleeping...” Her words were backed up by her disheveled hair and the bandage that was only partially hanging on to her nose. She then blinked as she took in the scene of destruction before her. “Whoooaaa... what happened here?”

“Hmm, let’s see...” The blue-haired police officer tapped her chin sarcastically. “This warehouse held several large shipments of illegal muscle boosters and other illicit substances, we found four skivvy individuals with criminal records bearing Musclehead tattoos tied to a lamppost on the street near the warehouse with their Pokeballs hanging in a bag above them, and said fire was apparently started with a Flamethrower attack. WHAT DO YOU THINK HAPPENED!?” She finished in a shout of rage.

Maylene leaned back and blinked in muted shock as she processed the statement. “Ah... they were attacked by a rival gang-member with a Houndoom?”

Officer Jenny’s eye twitched for a moment as she growled in annoyance before she finally grabbed Maylene by the front of her robe and began to drag her down the street. “Come with me!”

“Woah!” Maylene stumbled as she tried to keep up with the enraged officer. “W-where are we going?”

“Papa Pierre’s Pizzeria!”

“Oooooh, really?” Maylene’s eyes lit up at the mention of food. “Are we getting pizza for breakfast?”

“NOT EVEN CLOSE!”

“Aww...”

-o-

In the well-lit and polished dining hall of the twenty-four hour eatery known as Papa Pierre’s Pizzeria, only one individual was partaking in the delicious Johto-original dish at the insane, Un-Legendary hour.

This individual was a tall, well-dressed and out-of-place man, whose attire- suit, fedora, gloves and cane- were all far too highbrow for the obviously low-key eatery. Even his Pokeballs, well-kept and thoroughly polished, denoted a level of wealth and status that would have been otherwise unheard of in the establishment.

Nevertheless, the man hummed pleasantly as he savored bite of cheese pizza he was partaking in. Once he’d swallowed, he cast a winning smile towards the counter of the restaurant. “As delicious as always, Francois! This is why I eat so late, your pies are truly magnificent!”

The man standing behind the counter laughed generously as he rubbed his head in embarrassment through the large chef’s hat he was wearing. “Only the best for you, sir! After all, there isn’t a customer around who I like serving more than you!”

“Mag! Magby bee!” A short, red-skinned creature with a spout-like mouth cried happily in agreement, waving around a pizza spatula enthusiastically.

“Heh, and it looks like little Pierrot agrees with me!” The chef laughed as he rubbed the Magby’s head affectionately.

“Now now, Francois!” The well-dressed man shook his finger at the chef mock-accusingly. “I trust you aren’t disgracing your other customers by serving them substandard pies!”

“Gasp!” The chef whipped his hand to his chest in exaggerated insult. “You wound me, monsieur!”

“Well we can’t have that, can we? Allow me to make it up to you!” The man chuckled in a good-natured manner before snapping his fingers expectantly. “Garcon! Your wine list!”

The Magby cried joyfully as he swiped a sheet of laminated paper from behind the counter and ran up to the man, proffering it to him eagerly.

The man chuckled kindly as he patted Pierrot on the head and took the list. “Thank you, Garcon.” He then began to lazily contemplate the menu. “Let’s see... I believe I’ll have the... Alto Mare 4982.”

Francois felt a thrill of exhilaration as he recalled the price of said bottle. “An excellent choice, Mister-!”

“JASPER EARNSHAW!”

Both Francois and Pierrot jumped in shock and fear when a female shriek rang out and the door to the restaurant was kicked open.

The suited man, however, was unaffected as he handed the menu back to the magby. “On second thought, better make it a Battle Chateau 4919. Ah, and here!” He drew a folded banknote out of his pocket and handed it to the short Pokemon. “For your troubles.”

The Magby took one look at the note before squealing in shock and running straight back to Francois and waving the piece of paper about excitedly. The chef took the note from his hand, saw the amount of zeroes, and smiled enthusiastically at the man. “Right away, Mister Earnshaw!” He cried as he and his Pokemon entered the back to search for the desired bottle.

Jasper’s smile never left his face as he watched an irate, blue-haired officer march up to his table, flanked by a pink-haired and drowsy Gym Leader and a somewhat uncomfortable-looking orange-furred dog.

“Officer Jenny, what a pleasure it is to see you again!” He greeted, doffing his hat politely before nodding at her companions in turn. “And you, Gym Leader Maylene, and you as well, young Growlithe!”

Maylene waved at the man tiredly. “Morning, Jasper.”

“Growr!” The Growlithe barked, panting at him happily.

SLAM!

The two jumped in shock and fear when Jenny slammed her palms on the table, leaning forwards and glaring at the nonplussed man. “Cut the crap, Earnshaw,” She snarled indignantly. “You’re not getting away with it this time. Tell him, Maylene!”

Maylene started slightly at being addressed before nodding hastily. “Ah-! S-she’s right! You’re going away for a long time, you bad, bad man!”

Jasper pouted slightly as he folded his hands in his lap. “Is that so? Well, that’s a crying shame. Are you sure we might not be able to put our differences aside over, say...” He gestured innocently at the mostly whole pizza before him. “A slice of tomato sauce and mozzarella? I have more than enough for all of you.”

In an instant, Maylene’s mood snapped from exhausted to eager, drool hanging from her lips as she stared hungrily at the delicious dish before her. “For reals? Whatever you say, Mister Earnshaw sir!”

“MAYLENE!” Jenny snapped irritably.

“But Jeeeennyyy...” Maylene whined, gesturing helplessly at the table. “Piiizzaaa! I’m sooo hungry...”

Jasper chuckled good-heartedly as the police officer stared daggers at the League member. “Such animosity...” He leaned over and grinned at the onlooking Growlithe. “What about you, boy? You want a slice?”

“Grow-wow!” The Puppy Pokemon yapped eagerly, lipping his lips.

“Alright then, catch!” The man took a slice of the pizza and flung it into the air, prompting the young canine to wheel around and dash after the slice, leaping into the air and opening his mouth wide to receive it.

Jenny growled in frustration as she unclipped her Pokeball from her belt with practice and pointed it over her shoulder. “Return.”

The Growlithe disappeared in a flash of red light, leaving the slice to splatter against the ground.

Jasper tutted reproachfully as he observed the mess. “I do hope you intend to pay for that, Officer. That was a criminal waste of a perfectly good slice of pizza!”

“Bite me, Earnshaw!” The officer snarled. “You can’t talk yourself out of this one. I don’t care how much money you have or how ‘friendly’ you are, I am done letting you flaunt the law like it’s nothing more than a... a guideline!”

“My dear constable!” Jasper whipped his hand to his chest in over-exaggerated offense. “I assure you, I have nothing but the utmost of respect for the laws that you so endearingly uphold!” He flashed her a cheeky grin. “Shall I testify to such under oath?”

Jenny’s eye twitched violently before she reached into her back pocket and slammed a pair of handcuffs onto the table. “Assume. The position.”

Jasper sighed wearily as he extended his wrists before himself. “Really now, Officer. Can’t we at least attempt to be civil?”

SLAM!

“OW!” He grunted as his face was slammed into the table and his arms were wrenched behind his back. “That was hardly necessary...” He groaned.

“Not in my book...” Officer Jenny growled as she fastened the metal bracelets around his wrists. “Jasper Earnshaw, you are under arrest for arson, assault and battery with a Pokemon, and for being an absolute, unrepentant ass. Say goodbye to your freedom, scumbag, because I promise you, this time, nothing short of divine intervention will set you free!”

It was at that point that the night sky was suddenly lit by a blinding ray of light.

“Well now...” Jasper stated succinctly. “That is both extremely fortuitous and unfortunate.”

“Oh you have got to be-!”

“Rest now my children, for when you awake a whole new world shall be your home.”

And everything became white.

-o-

Jasper groaned fuzzily as he re-entered the waking world, his skull throbbing with more pain than he thought was possible.

“Owww... did anyone get the number of that Rampardos’s owner?” He moaned, bringing his wing up to his forehead.

‘...wait a moment...’

Jasper slowly opened his eyes and regarded the pitch-black feathers that appeared to have replaced his fingers. Upon secondary examination, he noted that the feathers on the inside of his wings were actually dark red.

He blinked slowly as he processed this fact before slowly pushing himself up and climbing to his... ‘I have talons...’ He noted numbly. Looking down at his body, he noted more facts. ‘And a predominantly black plumage, save for a white crest on my chest...’ He raised his wing and felt the top of his head. ‘And this black one on my head, shaped like a fedora...’

Jasper blinked again as he considered the information presented to him. ‘I appear to have somehow become a Honchkrow. How ironic, yet oddly fitting...’ He looked up and around himself, taking in his snow-covered surroundings and the brick buildings that formed the alleyway he was apparently in. ‘Also, I am, apparently, in a set of unfamiliar surroundings. That, or Snowpoint City.’

Suddenly, glancing downwards, he noted an object lying in the snow next to him. ‘Well. It would appear that my cane came alongside me. Good. It cost me a small fortune. It would be a shame if I found myself having to replace it.’

He leaned over, stumbling slightly due to his unfamiliar and displaced center of balance, before picking up the rod of wood, clutching the curved top with his feathers in a manner similar to how he’d seen Farfetch’d hold their leeks in pictures and documentaries.

Jasper stared at his cane emotionlessly before breathing out of his nose and pressing his cane to his forehead. “Do not panic. Panic is the mind-killer. You have succeeded by using panic to your advantage in the past. Do. Not. Panic.” He muttered quietly to himself. He took in a deep breath... and then released it slowly. “Alright... prioritize... no Pokeballs around... so I don’t know where my family is. That... is a definite priority.”

“Alright, ground-pounder! Hand over all your bits, now!”

The Honchkrow clenched his eyes shut and let out a heavy sigh of exasperation. “Although I suppose it plays second-fiddle to that. Miranda was right, my good-samaritanism is a curse...”

And with that, he passed his cane into his talons, flapped his wings, took to the air...!

And promptly scrambled to land on his talons instead of his face when he fell back down to the ground, only just swapping his cane back to his wing in time to catch himself with it.

“Right, going to have to work on that...” He grumbled before waddling towards the raised voices as fast as his avian legs allowed, aided somewhat by his cane.

-o-

Maud blinked slowly as she stared up at the two heavily-built pegasi that were hovering above her.

“You hear me, dirt-for-brains?” The one on the left with the switchblade cutie mark growled, flexing his well-built biceps menacingly. “This is Baron territory. You either hand over the bits, or we’ll break your legs.”

“Hehehe, yeah,” The other, with a griffin knuckle-duster Cutie Mark, chuckled darkly. “It’ll be fun seeing ya try and crawl away.”

Maud withheld a weary sigh as she watched her two assailants. This was the third time that month that she’d been held up, and it wasn’t even the second half of it yet. Really, it was getting quite annoying by this point.

To say that Stalliongrad had been different than she’d expected would be a major understatement. Yes, some aspects were as promised. Cold? Yes, but nothing she couldn’t handle. Isolated? Most definitely, but she liked it that way. Diverse population? A higher than average population of griffins, a few dozen minotaurs and zebra, even the odd diamond dog. Highly-profitable trade industry? Apparently, the isolation allowing for easy airship-access, coupled with its relative proximity to Griffinhiem, all but guaranteed it.

What she hadn’t been prepared for was the distinct lawlessness. It wasn’t that the Royal Guard didn’t have a presence, it was just that due to the divisiveness over varying equally represented and supported political factions constantly vying control of the local government, they never got enough support and leeway to do any good.

As such, the city had been all but carved up by three major gangs: The Conclave, a unicorn-centric organization that was relatively civilized and ran a variety of protection rackets and smuggling and gambling rings, The Cultivators, a hard-headed and extremely thick-skinned band of Earth Ponies who grew and sold everything from azaleas to poison joke, and finally the Barons, the ever-violent and xenophobic gang of pegasi whose sole goal was complete and utter control of whatever territory they could get their hooves on.

Ironically enough, all three gangs equally hired griffons based on their availability and necessity, due to the hybrids bearing enough traits to make them neutral territory.

“Hey! Equestria to earth-head! Are you hearing me, or is there too much mud in your ears to listen to anything?! Are you gonna hand over the bits or what!?”

Maud blinked again as the Baron spoke up. She’d been so lost in her thoughts, she’d almost forgotten about them. It had been happening a lot lately, due to the combined stress of having to remember who controlled where and attempting to think of anything other than the extravagant student loans she needed to pay off. While the education she was receiving in the Stalliongrad University of Geology in order to obtain her Rocktorate was top-notch, it was also expensive. As such, she couldn’t afford to spend her bits on anything. Not on quality food, not on a better apartment, and definitely not on a pair of chauvinistic pegasi.

Maud shook her head slowly in denial. “No. I won’t give you my bits. I don’t want to.”

The pegasi glanced at each other incredulously before giving her a pair of vicious grins.

“On your head be it.” The one on the left chuckled.

The two started to swoop down...

“KROW!”

“HEY!” “WHAT THE-!?”

Maud blinked in surprise when a large, black-feathered and vaguely crow-shaped bird suddenly hopped in front of her, jumping up and down and waving a stick- no, a cane, she noted idly- a cane at the pegasi, cawing and squawking at them furiously.

“What the Tartarus-?” The second pegasus asked in confusion.

“Move it, ya dumb bird!” The first pegasus demanded, waving his hoof irritably.

Instead of complying, the odd bird gripped his cane with both his wings and swung it even more forcefully. “KROW! KROW! HONCHKROW KROW!”

“Tch...” The knife-mark’d pegasus scoffed, lowering himself and extending his hooves. “Dumb bird. You don’t wanna move? Fine! Eat my-!”

THWACK!

“OW!” The pegasus cried out in pain when the bird suddenly leapt up and slammed its cane straight down on his forehead. The pegasus growled furiously as he glared down at the bird. “Right, that tears it, no more mister nice-pegasus. I hope that Sergov is hungry, because he likes his meat raw!”

“KROW!” The crow-bird cried, waving his cane about defiantly.

That was when Maud chose to step in.

She laid her hoof on the bird’s shoulder, prompting it to halt in its actions and look at her in confusion.

“Thank you.” She stated simply. She then looked at the pegasi and narrowed her eyes minutely. “Leave. Now.”

The knuckle-duster pegasus snorted derisively. “Why? What the Tartarus can you... you... you... ah...”

His protests swiftly died when Maud slipped her hoof beneath a nearby dumpster and hefted it above her head.

“Leave.” She repeated flatly.

The pegasi glanced at one another before flapping their wings and darting away.

“THIS ISN’T OVER, ROCK-HEAD! WE’LL TELL THE BARONS! WE’LL HAVE YOUR HEAD ON A-!”

“DUDE, SHUT UP! I DON’T WANNA GET CREAMED!”

And with that, they were gone.

Maud and the bird stared after them silently for a moment until the bird turned to her, puffed its chest out and folded its wings over the top of its cane. “Honch, Honch krow. Krow krow, honch krow Honch.” It cawed, raising its wing and nodding its head as though doffing its hat-like plumage.

Maud stared at it evenly. “I can’t understand you.” She stated.

The crow blinked twice before slapping its wing to its face. It then glanced back and forth before noticing a patch of untouched snow. It then hopped over to the snow, reaffirmed its grip on its cane and...

Maud blinked in surprise when the crow stuck its cane in the snow and actually started to write something.

“Can you read this?”

The crow turned its head and looked at her expectantly.

Maud nodded, indicating her understanding.

The crow hopped up and pumped his wing victoriously. It then hopped over to a wider stretch of snow and began to write with earnest.

“Perfect! Now, my name is Jasper Earnshaw. I am a being known as a human, who is currently in the form of a Honchkrow. Would you mind telling me who you are and where I am? I’m a bit lost.”

Maud read the message silently before pointing her hoof at herself. “My name is Maud Pie. I’m an Earth Pony.” She then gestured at the buildings surrounding the two of them. “This is Stalliongrad. A city in northern Equestria.”

The Honchkrow blinked at flatly before slowly writing out another message.

“Well... it would appear that I’m in quite the pickle.”

Chapter 2

“And that’s the long and short o-”

CLUNK!

Jasper gave a caw of irritation when his cane clunked against the wall, having run out of snow to write on. “Curse my tendency to lapse into prose...” He grumbled to himself.

The pony -Maud, he reminded himself- silently looked over what he had written, quietly contemplating his words and explanation of his origins. He had to admit, in a way, she reminded him of Bartleby: obviously strong, but excessively quiet, only speaking when need be. Truth be told, he found the familiarity quite comforting. While he had been writing, she had explained varying facts about his current location: Stalliongrad, Equestria and Equus in general.

Finally, she regarded him flatly. “That’s very interesting.” She stated flatly, her expression remaining neutral. “So Pokemon are like slaves?”

“WHAT?!” Jasper screeched in shock, leaping almost a foot into the air and flapping his wings viciously. “ARE YOU COMPLETELY OUT OF YOUR-!?” He bit his tongue when he noticed her raised eyebrow before growling furiously and sweeping his wing out to clear a wide portion of the snow. He then began writing as swiftly and furiously as he could.

“ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!” Jasper rammed his cane into the snow severely as he carved out the exclamation points. “I promise you, I have nothing but the utmost of respect for my family! Why, I will have you know that I didn’t even battle one of my Pokemon when they joined me! I rescued them off the streets! Not a lot of trainers and whatnot can make that claim! I assure you, most who use Pokeballs love and respect their Pokemon! And those who don’t... well...”

Jasper growled darkly as he tightened his grip on his cane before hopping over to the wall and lashing out with his talons, gouging a deep furrow into the building.

“They don’t last long enough to regret it.”

Maud stared at the scratches silently before looking at Jasper again. “You sound like you have experience with them.”

The human-turned-Honchkrow grit his beak and looked away for a moment before sighing heavily and nodding. “Veilstone City has a throbbing dark side. Good or bad, you live in that city, you deal with it. End of story.”

Another moment of silent contemplation, then... “So which are you?” Maud asked.

Jasper blinked in confusion. “I beg your pardon?”

“You said good or bad.” She clarified. “So which are you?”

The bird Pokemon opened his beak... and promptly snapped it shut, clearly thinking hard before bowing his head. “A fair question. When I have an answer, you’ll be the first to know.”

Maud nodded. “Thank you. Now. Tell me, what do we do now?”

Jasper raised his eyebrow at her. “You want to help me? Why?”

The pony shrugged indifferently. “My sister was always happy when I knew her, but when she got friends of her own she became much happier. Maybe if I get friends, I’ll be happier too. Friends help each other, right?”

“You don’t have friends already?”

“Only my family and my pet rock, Boulder. Normally they’re all I need, but now...” The corners of her mouth tilted ever so slightly downwards as she regarded her cold, sad surroundings. “I wouldn’t mind having more.”

“Pet ro-” Jasper changed his mind and hastily erased what he was writing. “Right, well, give me a moment.” He frowned and tapped his cane on his shoulder thoughtfully as he began to slowly pace back and forth. “Alright, alright, let’s think for a moment...” He muttered to himself. “Prior, I prioritized finding my family. However, in light of recent facts, there is no means through which I can confirm that my family is, in fact, even in the same world as I am. As a matter of fact, there isn’t even a way to confirm that I’m not the sole Pokemon on the entire conti-!” His tirade died as a thought popped into his feathered head.

Slowly, he turned his head and stared at the dumpster that Maud had threatened to turn into a projectile earlier.

“That could work.” He decided before writing again. “Would you mind picking up that dumpster again and rattling it for me? I need to confirm a theory.”

Maud blinked at him before gripping the edge of the container with both her forehooves, rearing up on her hind legs and shaking it violently.

“WAH! EARTHQUAKE!”

“HEY, WATCH IT!”

“I WAS EATING THAT!”

“LET’S GET OUT OF HERE!”

She then dropped it to the ground in shock when several particularly malodorous creatures, some shaped like garbage bags with legs, some like mobile piles of slime, some like little green bags of flesh, and some like overly large pink rats, burst and oozed their way out of the top and scurried out of the alleyway. “What were those?” She asked in subdued surprise.

“Trubbish, Grimers, Gulpin and Rattata.” Jasper etched successfully. “Four species of Pokemon that are notorious for their status as vermin. Why, I wouldn’t be surprised if there were still one or two Burmy attached to the inside of that dumpster collecting garbage for their cloaks!”

“And the point of this exercise was...?” Maud looked at him flatly.

“Why, to confirm whether or not there were more Pokemon besides me around of course! And before you ask, yes, I could have opened the dumpster myself to check, but I would have gotten my plumage dirty in the progress, and considering how I don’t know how to preen, that would have been nothing short of a nightmare. Of course, this answers only one question and raises many more, but we can deal with them at a later date.”

As he now knew was the norm, Maud didn’t react, though he did think he noticed a minute twitch in the corner of her right eye. “So what now?”

Jasper tapped his cane to his chin in thought. “A very good question. The first objective I desire to accomplish would be to find my family, but the issue with that objective would be finding them in the first place. I mean, this is a big city, so trying to find even one of them would be like searching for a needle in a haystack, if they’re in this city at all. What we need is a sign, or a signal or-”

“HEEELP!”

The two individuals snapped their heads up and stared as a pair of muscular pegasi flew above them, screaming their heads off.

“DEMON! MONSTER! HELP!”

Maud tilted her head in surprise. “I think that those two were Barons...”

Jasper sighed heavily as he ran his wing over his plumage. “Or I suppose that they could get themselves into a heaping pile of trouble. Based upon the given descriptions, I would have to say that Carson and Bartleby were set upon by members of the organization and decided to retaliate. Or at least....” Jasper’s beak twisted into an approximation of a grimace. “I certainly hope that’s the explanation, for their sake. Well, either way, if you’re intent on aiding me, then you’d better follow me. We’d better stop those two before they permanently break someone.”

The dark pony hummed in agreement before turning around and presenting her back to him. “Hop on.”

“Wait, what?!” Jasper crowed in surprise, forgetting to write.

Luckily, Maud was able to interpret what he was saying. “Do you think that you can keep up with me on your legs?”

“Well when you put it like that...” Jasper muttered to himself before hopping up and flapping his wings to land squarely on Maud’s back, clutching uneasily at her frock.

Maud looked over her shoulder at him. “Could you loosen your grip a bit? I don’t mind the talons, but it is my favorite dress. I’d rather not have to bury a new friend over clothes.”

Jasper grinned as apologetically as he could manage with his beak before snapping his focus forwards. “Onwards!” He cawed, jabbing his cane over her head. “Follow the trail of fleeing bigots and ne’er-do-wells!”

Maud rolled her eyes slightly before complying and galloping in the direction that the pegasi were fleeing from.

-o-

THUNK! THUNK! THUNK!

“You want to know something, Bartholomew?”

“Hm?”

THUNK! THUNK! THUNK!

“At the end of the day, no matter what happens... good... or bad... I can always get my mood up... with a little game... that’s known... as stabscotch.”

“Hm...”

“Nonono, please, don’t, don’t....”

THUNK! THUNK! THUNK!

“Because no matter what... whether I win...”

THUNK! THUNK! THUNK!

“Or lose...”

THUNK! THUNK! KER-THUNK!

“YEAAAGH!”

“I come out a little bit happier.”

“Hmph.”

Carson sighed sadly as he yanked the nail he’d stabbed into his hand out of the picnic table he was sitting at, as well as his limb. “I suppose, that makes me a bit of a sadist, but meh!” He shrugged as he slipped his nail into the corner of his zipper alongside the other two he was biting. “So be it. We all have our quirks. I get my laughs by making select individuals regret every decision they’ve ever made...”

“My hoof...” The pegasus that was currently pinned under Bartholomew’s foot whined, cradling his hoof desperately. “W-what did you do to my hoof...?”

“And you get your chuckles breaking bones!” Carson jabbed his hand at Bartholomew, his arm enshrouded by his somewhat oversized leather duster. “Now now, don’t deny it, I’ve seen you in your fights: you’re often just as happy as when you’re eating, and that is a feat!”

“Mmmm...” Bartholomew shrugged indifferently, tilting his head side to side as he dug his arm around in the burlap sack he was holding before grinning happily as he pulled an apple out and popped the whole thing into his mouth.

“Admittedly!” Carson clapped his hands together through his jacket. “While we are far from being saints, we could definitely be far worse! Thank Arceus for the Boss! Who knows where we would be without him!”

“Dead.” Bartholomew grunted.

“Or worse!” Carson nodded in agreement, his zipper falling into a solemn frown. “But! Right now?” His zipper raised back into a grin as he stood up from the table he’d been sitting at. He hummed a jaunty tune as he ambled towards Bartholomew, occasionally going out of his way to step on the limb and/or torso of one of the downed Pegasi that lay groaning around the park he and his friend were currently located in. Reaching their captive, he knelt down before the pegasus, using his arm to tilt his fedora back slightly. “The Boss isn’t here. As such, we have free reign to do whatever we so desire! Isn’t that right, Bartholomew?”

“Mm-hmm...” Bartholomew hummed in agreement, leering down ferally at the captive he was stepping on, using his thumb to push his fedora up on his head.

“I realize you can’t understand me...” Carson gripped the pegasus by his snout and forced him to look him in the eye. “But I’ve got to be honest: In a few seconds, it is going to suck to be you. Have you ever hear of a game called... the chicken wing game?”

The pegasus obviously heard the question in Carson’s voice, seeing how he shook his head frantically.

“Awww, well isn’t that just a crying shame! What about you, Bartholomew?” Carson grinned up at his colleague. “Have you ever heard of the chicken wing game?”

Batholomew’s grin widened by several teeth as he slowly nodded.

“Perfect! Now see, normally, this game is played with arms. But in all honesty?” His zipper seemed to stretch into an even wider grin as he reached behind the pegasus’s head, prompting him to struggle in horror when he felt the thing’s hand wrap around the root of his wing.

Carson leaned in so that he and the pony were face to face. “I’m eager to try playing the game with real wings. With any luck, it’ll make things interesting.”

He tightened his grip...

“CARSON! SHAME ON YOU!”

THWACK!

“GAH!” Carson cried out in pain when something all too solid fell on his head, cracking against his cranium and forcing him to relinquish his grip on the limb in favor of clutching his skull.

“AND YOU, BARTLEBY!”

CLUNK!

“Grgh!” The large Pokemon grunted in pain as the same object cracked against the back of his shin, forcing him to stumble back slightly and allow the pegasus just enough room to breath easily, though he was unable to fly due to the fact that his hoof still felt like it had been run through.

“Unbelievable! To think that two members of my own family would partake in such barbarism! I am deeply, deeply ashamed!”

“What the-?” Carson blinked in shock as he registered the Honchkrow that was standing behind him and violently berating him. “Hey, who the heck do you think you-?” Any and all words he was about to say died in his throat as he caught sight of just what the Dark-Flying Type had smacked him with. “Where did you get that cane?” He asked quietly.

Snapping his head down and catching sight of the Honchkrow, Barthlomew drew his lips back and growled in furious agreement.

The Honchkrow narrowed his eyes as he folded his wings on the cane and thunked it definitively on the ground. “This is my cane, and before you can even think of protesting, yes, I am Jasper Earnshaw, founder of Earnshaw Shipping and your owner, as well as the owner of Lyell, Bruno, Samuel and Miranda, yes, I am currently a Honchkrow, no, I do not know how I became one, nor how we ended up in a new world that is apparently not our own, and no, I am most definitely not in the mood for your games! Are there any questions?”

The nails nearly fell out of Carson’s mouth as he gaped in shock at the fast-talking and vaguely familiar-sounding bird before scowling and leaning forwards, looming over the Pokemon as he raised his hand to his mouth and gripped one of his nails menacingly. “And tell me...” He growled. “Why the he- he... he...”

The words died in his mouth as he stared into the Honchkrow’s eyes. He might not recognize the shape, and the voice might have been distorted by the warble of the form... but there was no mistaking that fury. That cold, burning rage. That was an easy identifier.

Carson swallowed heavily as he began to chuckle nervously. “He... hehe... ah... h-hey Boss... wow, b-being a Pokemon’s treating you g-great, huh? I-I-I mean, wow! Y-you’ve already gotten Mean Look down pat!”

Bartholomew nodded hastily as he plastered a panicked grin on his face.

Jasper’s glare didn’t let up as he shifted it between the two Pokemon evenly. “I am not amused, boys.”

Carson and Bartholomew flinched and bowed their heads. “Yes, boss...” They mumbled in shame. Well, Carson mumbled, the quietest Bartholomew could get was a rumble.

“As a matter of fact, I am very, very disappointed in the both of you!”

“Yes, boss...”

“Not for getting into a fight, of course, judging by the number of hooligans here, I can guess that they started it, and I comprehend the concept of self-defense. No, the reason why I’m disappointed in the both of you is for needlessly antagonizing the poor fellow well beyond what was necessary!”

“Yes, boss...”

“I’d hoped that you would have come to understand by this point that pointlessly torturing foes and individuals is a tactic employed solely by scoundrels and mongrels, thus making it beneath us, but apparently I was wrong! Am I correct?”

“Er... Yes, boss?”

“Indeed I am! Now, you will do the right thing and apologize to this poor pegasus!”

“Yes, boss...” The duo groaned before addressing the pegasus that was watching them fearfully. “We’re sorry for torturing you...”

The pegasus’s response was to try flap his wings in an attempt to fly away from his assailants, but he was halted by Bartholomew ramming his foot down on his tail and pinning him in place.

“Well now, that was rude...” Jasper sniffed indignantly before shrugging. “Bah, no matter. Anyways...” Jasper spread his wing out and indicated the neutral pony behind him. “Allow me to introduce Maud Pie. This kind individual informed me of the details of our current location and aided me in reaching you two. I’m very grateful for her assistance. Please introduce yourselves.”

“Hello, Miss Maud,” The two droned simultaneously as they waved at her.

“Very good! Now then, allow me a moment to introduce the two of you. I apologize, but the language barrier is quite the inconvenience.” He turned around and started writing in the snow. “These are two members of my family. The more diminutive fellow with the odd mouth is Carson, a Banette and my first companion...”

Carson and Bartholomew exchanged questioning glances at Jasper’s wording of the message before the fabric-skinned ghost shrugged and doffed his fedora in greeting.

“And the larger individual is Bartleby, a Snorlax and trusted companion of mine.”

Bartleby grunted in acknowledgement as he popped another apple into his mouth before waving.

Jasper regarded the bag of food the Sleeping Pokemon was holding with no small amount of suspicion. “I trust you boys didn’t steal that bag, did you? I’d be very ashamed if you did.”

Carson hook his head frantically in denial. “O-of course not boss! No one wanted those apples, we swear! They were just sitting there, hand to Arceus!”

The Honchkrow’s only response was to let out a weary sigh while Maud raised her hoof and waved at the other individuals. “Hello, Carson. Hello, Bartleby. Hello, intolerant Baron goon.”

Apparently, racist tendencies came before pain in the pegasus’s eyes as he snapped his attention away from his hoof and glared at the earth pony. “Go to Tartarus, ground-poun-OUCH!”

The pegasus hissed in pain as Carson grabbed his ear and twisted it furiously. “Oy!” He snarled. “That there is the boss’s lady friend! You will treat her with the respect she is undoubtedly due! Otherwise...” The Baron’s eyes widened and he whimpered in fear when Carson took a nail out of his mouth and held it to his own throat. “Things will get very uncomfortable for you. Capiche?”

The stallion breathed heavily as he stared at the indignant Banette.

Carson pressed his point by jerking on the equine’s ear, directing his head towards Maud and pressing the nail further into the fabric that composed his throat. “Apologize.”

The Baron winced before complying. “S-s-sorry...?” he stammered, breathing a sigh of relief when his ear was released and the Banette took the nail away from its throat, replacing it in the corner of his zipper.

Carson let out a weary sigh of exasperation as he shook his head definitively. “Honestly now, these individuals are more insistent than I’d expected. You know they attacked us out of the blue for no good reason? Called us monsters and abominations, said some hoo-ha about this being their ‘territory’ and whatnot and tried to attack us! Heh...” His eyes lit up with a crimson light. “Let me tell you, with a quick Night Shade to run most of ‘em off and Bartleby blasting the rest of them? It went about as well as you could expect.”

“Heheheh...” Bartleby chuckled grimly as he held his hand up, allowing sparks of electricity to crackle around his fingers. “Not as fun as Flying Types, but still good.”

“An interesting factoid...” Jasper noted before shaking his head. “But irrelevant at the moment. Now, I do believe we’ve detained our poor friend long enough. Bartleby?” He swung his cane out definitively. “Dispose of him, if you would.”

The Snorlax’s grin widened as he stepped off of the pegasus’s tail, allowing him to fly away... at least for a moment. Faster than anything his size had any right to move, Bartleby’s freehand whipped out and grabbed the Baron by his neck, violently halting his forward momentum. He then reeled his arm back and hurled the pegasus into the air, sending the racist gangmember flying over the buildings for a fair moment until he regained his wits and caught himself with his wings, allowing him to both glide and flap away from his tormentors.

Carson let out a low whistle of respect at the throw. "You know, it still scares me that you're better at using Fling than Lyell could ever hope to be? I mean, sure, you're a hundred times his weight, but come on! He's a Dark Type! There's a clear home-field advantage!"

Bartleby's only response was to let out a rumbling chuckle.

Jasper nodded contentedly as he watched the Baron depart before turning around and starting to walk away. “Well, not that that’s over and done with, let’s be off. I think I have an inkling on how to locate the rest of our family, but I’ll need your help. See, on my way here-!”

“FREEZE! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE!”

The Honchkrow and his companions halted in their tracks when a forceful command rang out throughout the alleyway.

Maud’s eyes widened slightly in recognition. “Uh-oh.”

Jasper groaned and clenched his eyes shut. “Dare I ask?”

Suddenly, a squad of equines in golden armor, earth ponies, unicorns and pegasi alike, entered the park, surrounding the group. Several of the ponies split off from the main group to arrest the unconscious Barons that remained, but the rest remained focused on the Pokemon and Earth Pony.

“The Royal Guard.”

“Perfect...”

Carson and Bartleby glared furiously at the soldiers surrounding them. Carson raised his hand and gripped the nails in his mouth, idly fiddling with them as he eyed the ponies. A malevolent purple aura danced up and down the length of the metal spikes. Meanwhile, Bartleby hefted the half-full bag of apples up with his hand and up-ended it into his mouth, allowing the rest of the fruit to cascade into his maw, along with the bag itself. The Snorlax bared his lips and snarled as he wiped his mouth off with his arm.

The Guards bristled at the threatening reactions...

“WAIT!”

But before anyone could move, they were cut off by Jasper squawking and wildly waving his cane in the air. The Honchkrow snapped his head between his Pokemon and those surrounding him desperately, before ramming his cane into the snow and began desperately scribbling out a message.

“Listen, officers, I realize that-”

“Excuse me?”

He stopped writing and looked up in surprise when one of the armored unicorns stepped forwards.

“We’ve been having some luck communicating with others like you by using basic translation spells. It’s noninvasive and instantaneous. May I?”

Jasper considered the unicorn’s words for a moment before raising his eyebrow at Maud, who simply shrugged indifferently in response. After another moment of heavy thinking he glanced over his shoulder and lifted a wing. Carson and Bartleby glanced at one another uneasily before minutely relaxing.

The human-turned-Krow looked back at the unicorn and nodded slowly. “Do it.”

The unicorn nodded in turn. “Alright then...” His horn lit up with dark gray energy. “Hold still...”

FLASH!

“GAH!” Jasper flinched slightly as he rubbed his wing over his eyes. “Good Groudon, that’s bright!”

Maud blinked too, but she in surprise. “I can understand you.”

Jasper snapped his head up at her. “What, really?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“Well then!” Jasper puffed his chest out with pride as he addressed the guard. “This makes the endeavour much simpler! Greetings, officers! I do so apologize for my colleagues’ actions, but I assure you, they were in self-defense. Allow me to introduce myself! My name is Jasper-!”

“Jasper Earnshaw?” The unicorn cut him off intently, he and the rest of the Guard suddenly becoming very tense.

Jasper and his Pokemon stiffened in turn as they exchanged a far more nervous set of looks. “Yyyyes...?” He answered hesitantly.

The unicorn and and another Guard glanced at one another before falling into ready stances. “Jasper Earnshaw, you’re under arrest for arson and assault and battery with a Pokemon.”

The jaws of all three Pokemon fell open in shock, and even Maud’s eyes widened an inch in shock as she glanced at Jasper.

“WHAT!?” Carson shrieked in outrage, Bartholomew nodding hastily in agreement.

Jasper swallowed nervously as he fought to steady his mind. “Where... did you draw those charges from exactly?”

“Sound familiar, Jasper?”

Jasper’s eyes widened in uncomfortable recognition as a familiar voice piped up. “Oh dear...”

Carson groaned and rammed the heel of his palm into his forehead. “Oh sweet Giratina...”

Bartholomew groaned as he tilted his fedora over his eyes. “This ain’t good...”

Without warning, the Guards parted to the side, allowing a relatively large, falcon-like bird with predominantly orange plumage with feathers reminiscent of a fire motif and a small-ish puppy with orange and black fur and a cream-colored tuft on its head to walk through.

To any one else at all familiar with Pokemon, the pair would have been any old Talonflame and Growlithe.

However, the all-too familiar hat resting on the Talonflame’s head, as well as her voice, were more than enough context for Jasper.

“Hello, Earnshaw,” Officer Jenny grinned sadistically.

The Growlithe grinned uncomfortably as he waved his paw . “H-hello again, Mister Jasper.”

Jasper silently cursed his luck before plastering a grin on his beak and waddling forwards. “Officer Jenny! My, what a pleasant surprise it is to see another familiar face whole and healthy in this strange place we’ve landed in! I see you’ve gotten right back to the force, huh? Good for you, good for you! Arceus alone knows how good an officer you are! Anyways, look, I realize that there’s been some bad blood between us in the past, but, eh... considering present circumstances...” He extended his wing towards her and widened his grin. “Let bygones be bygones?”

Jenny stared at him coldly for a second... before grinning in turn and extending her wing to touch his own.

Jasper heaved a sigh of relief. “Oh thank-!”

KER-CHICK!

His eyes snapped open when an all-too familiar sound reached his ears and an all-too familiar feeling wrapped around his wing.

“Oh Tauros-shit.”

WHAM!

“ACK!” Jasper winced as he was slammed face-first into the ground, grimacing as his beak was partly buried in the snow. “Really? Now of all times?” He moaned.

“What can I say, Earnshaw?” Jenny grinned as she fastened the other end of the large cuffs she was carrying around her captive’s other wing, latching them behind his back. “Justice never sleeps. And is it just me, or are these pegasus-tailored wingcuffs really convenient?”

“Fascinating... Carson, would you do me a favor and hold my cane? I seem to be unable of doing it myself...”

The Banette hastily complied as he snatched the rod of wood from the ground before casting an unsure look at the unicorn that had cast the translation spell. “Hey, isn’t this place kind of out of her jurisdiction!?”

The unicorn’s response was a simple shrug. “She’s been helping us keep the peace since you Pokemon showed up an hour ago, so I’m inclined to give her a break. We’ll settle this matter back at the precinct. If you’ll follow me?”

Carson and Bartleby exchanged uncertain glances, but Jasper spoke up before either of them could make a move. “Do what he says, boys.” He grunted as he climbed back to his feet. “After all, we’ve done absolutely nothing wrong,” He looked over his shoulder and grinned at the officer escorting him. “And we have nothing but the utmost respect for those who choose to uphold the peace.”

The only response he received was for her to smack the back of his head with her wing. “Move it, scumbag.” She growled.

“May I come along?”

Most all movement stopped when Maud spoke up.

“Er... are you sure?” The unicorn asked, looking at her questioningly.

Maud gave him a flat stare. “He’s my friend. I want to come along.”

Officer Jenny let out a derisive snort. “Lady, trust me: you do not want to be even remotely related to this piece of trash.”

Her good humor quickly withered under Maud’s hard, unwavering stare.

“I. Want. To come along.” She repeated in the same tone of voice.

Jasper opened his beak to respond... but instead reconsidered and shut it.

The guard hesitated slightly before sighing in acceptance. “I... very well, then. Come along if you want.”

And with that, the group began to march out of the park, some more willingly than others.

-o-

Unseen on top of a nearby building, a short, dark individual watched the events with a combination of morose fascination and amusement.

“Hmm...” The figure stroked his chin contemplatively. “It would appear that the good master has found his way into a spot of trouble. Again.”

The figure heaved a heavy sigh. “And it appears that I’ll have to come to the good master’s aid to help him maintain his freedom. Again”

The figure was silent before allowing himself a nigh head-splitting grin.

“Excellent! It would not do if I were to find myself without a reason for my continued employment! This shall be most interesting!”

His eyes glinted eagerly as he continued to observe the procession.

“Most interesting indeed.”

Chapter 3

On a good day, the Stalliongrad Police Department was a hub of constant activity as the beleaguered Guard struggled to remain abreast of the city’s wide array of criminals and injustice.

Today, however, the Department was particularly hectic, with members of the Guard bustling in and out of the building as they tried to make sense of the chaos around them. Notably, the main source of activity was the array of odd, alien creatures that dotted the interior of the precinct alongside the other, more familiar faces.

Some were speaking urgently or angrily with available officers, others struggled and spat as they were dragged off to cells. Pokemon, griffins, minotaurs and ponies alike argued with one another liberally, nearly coming to blows. Those with wings were flapping them in an attempt to rise above the chaos and make themselves heard, but this only resulted in them getting caught in the clog of the dozen or so others who had the same idea.

The understaffed Guard scrambled to make heads or tails of the situation, attempting to deal with all the issues that were being presented before them. Here and there, some civilians and Pokemon stepped up to volunteer and give what aid they could, though it was but a drop in the bucket in face of the madness.

At the heart of the Department, shut away from the chaos, was the Local Chief’s office.

Chief Peace Keeper was silent as he observed the numerous Pokemon that were currently in his office: The white and black crow that was sitting morosely in his seat, shifting his cuffed wings about, the orange, hawk-like bird who was sitting to his left and giving him a particularly evil eye, the orange-furred puppy that was sitting on the ground next to her and grinning anxiously, the ragdoll-like creature who was on the crow’s right and grumpily chewing the nails in the zipper that acted as his mouth, as well as fidgeting with the cane he was holding, the large, by all accounts obese creature that was sitting in the back corner of the room, blinking blearily as he fought to stave off sleep, and the drab, dark gray pony that was sitting next to him.

Finally, the light gray unicorn sighed wearily as he folded his hooves on his desk. “So... where to start... I suppose that your names would be good.”

The crow puffed the white plumage on his chest out proudly. “Jasper. Jasper Earnshaw.”

The ragdoll scowled slightly as he pushed his hat up with Jasper’s cane. “Call me Carson.”

The large creature’s only response was to tip forwards slightly before jerking upright and let out a massive, jaw-cracking yawn.

Peace Keeper affixed the Snorlax an annoyed look. “Can you please try and stay awake?”

“A-actually...” Growlithe piped up hesitantly. “He really can’t.”

“The kid’s right.” Carson nodded in agreement. “Bartleby’s kind, Snorlaxes? They eat lots and lots of food at a time, then drop into insanely deep food comas. And believe you me, you do not want to be the one responsible for waking them up early. Or hell, even be in their general vicinity! Anyways, Bartleby keeps himself awake and relatively active by constantly chomping down on something. Unless you get him something to eat real fast, all he’s gonna be is a five ton paperweight!”

Peace Keeper swallowed heavily as he eyed the drowsy Snorlax. “Ah... well, I don’t suppose that anyone would happen to have any food on them, would they?”

Surprisingly enough, it was Maud who raised her hoof in response. “I do.” She reached beneath her frock and withdrew a large box from... somewhere.

Carson tilted his head in confusion. “Where the heck-?”

Maud shrugged indifferently. “It’s a family trick. Anyways...” She opened the box, reached in, and held up a lightly colored stone. “Here. Lick it or suck it. It will last longer than if you just bite it.”

Bartleby stirred slightly... before letting out a loud sniff. Then another, and another. Suddenly, his hand snapped out and he all but ripped the stone from Maud’s hoof. Within seconds, he was sitting perfectly upright as he sucked contentedly on the mineral.

Jasper blinked in surprise. “Rock candy?” He inquired.

“From old necklaces that my family made me.” The earth pony clarified. “Their strings snapped due to age and they fell apart. I don’t mind sacrificing them.”

“Right... well...” Peace Keeper hesitated slightly before shaking his head and continuing. “Now that that’s dealt with, Officer Jenny?”

The female Talonflame ended the death-glare she had been pinning Jasper with and refocused on the pony. “Yes, chief?”

“If you would please describe the nature of Mister Earnshaw’s crimes?”

“Right away, chief!” Jenny snapped into a salute with her wing before continuing to glare at Jasper. “This particular scumbag is guilty of assault and battery with his Pokemon, with which he attacked a number of individuals, and arson, wherein he burned down a warehouse, also with one of his Pokemon!”

Peace Keeper frowned in confusion. “What about these Pokemon of his? Shouldn’t they be held responsible for these crimes as well?”

“A-actually, sir...” Growlithe raised his paw nervously. “Back home, we had a saying: there are no bad Pokemon, only bad trainers. A-and while yeah, admittedly, there are some really rough Pokemon out there, it was the general consensus of the law back home that if a Pokemon owned by a Trainer committed a crime, t-then it was the Trainer’s fault for ordering it.”

“Hmm...” The unicorn nodded slowly. “I see... and... how did you come to find Mister Earnshaw as the guilty party for these crimes?”

“Two reasons,” Officer Jenny raised two of her feathers definitively. “First, I found Earnshaw eating in a pizzeria a block away from the warehouse minutes after we got the call that it had burned down. At three in the morning. And second, to back up the first point...” She renewed her glare on the human-turned-krow once anew. “This isn’t the first he’s done this. In fact, Jasper Earnshaw has attacked dozens of people and burned down dozens of buildings. He’s a criminal, plain and simple. Isn’t that right, Carson?” She sneered at the Banette.

Carson scoffed and looked away from her. “Get stuffed, Tepig.”

The Talonflame scowled indignantly. “Why you-!”

“Officer!” Peace Keeper raised his hoof evenly. “I’d like to remind you that you are simply being allowed to help in a probationary manner, and that this department is simply helping deal with this crime from your world as a courtesy. Please. Compose yourself.”

Officer Jenny grumbled darkly under her breath before she nodded solemnly.

“Good. Now then...” He addressed the cuffed bird directly in front of him. “Mister Earnshaw-”

“Please,” The Honchkrow interrupted. “Call me Jasper.”

“Jasper,” Peace Keeper acquiesced. “Would you be so kind as to explain your side of the story to me? Because frankly, the facts don’t appear to be in your favor.”

Jasper glanced at Officer Jenny for a moment before sighing and bowing his head. “I do apologize, Chief Keeper, but you simply must understand: I am, and always will be, a man of business. As such, I am afraid that I must resort to the tried and true method that has aided me in this very same position in the past: requesting legal council.”

Jenny and Growlithe moaned as they slapped their limbs to their faces while Peace Keeper frowned in confusion. “Meaning...?”

“We want a lawyer.” Jasper, Carson and Bartleby chorused flatly.

BANG!

Everyone present (save Maud) jumped in surprise when the office door was slammed open.

Peace Keeper jerked up onto his hindhooves in shock as he leaned against his desk. “What on Equus-!?”

“Uh oh...” Growlithe groaned, covering his head with his paws.

“Are you serious!?” Officer Jenny breathed in disbelief.

“Well, this is quite the pleasant surprise!” Jasper grinned enthusiastically.

“I’ll be a son of a Houndoom!” Carson cackled.

Bartleby let out a rumbling chuckle.

Standing in the doorway of the office was a short creature, close to a foot high. It was covered in dark-purple fur and skin and was grinning a cocky, self-assured grin with a mouth full of spiky, shark-like teeth. Two facts stood out about the creature: First, in place of normal eyes, it had a pair of six-sided, light blue gems implanted in its face. Second, it was wearing a pristine, tailor-made business suit and a red tie, and was toting around a small briefcase in his hand.

The creature swept its arm before itself and dropped into a bow. “Sable! Sableye, sable eye eye!” It proclaimed proudly. Ignoring the horrified look that Officer Jenny wass shooting it, the Pokemon marched past her and up to Peace Keeper’s desk, where it promptly gripped one of the unicorn’s hooves and shook it enthusiastically. “Sableye! Sable, sable sableye! Ableye...” It then snapped its hand down to its briefcase, popped it open, reached in and proffered a small card. “Sableye! Sable sableye!”

Quickly regaining his wits, Peace Keeper grabbed the card out of the creature’s hand and read it aloud. “‘Lyell Litigant, Attorney at Law’? What the-?”

“YOU NEVER PASSED THE BAR, YOU LITTLE DEMON!” Officer Jenny shrieked indignantly.

The Sableye, Lyell, continued to grin as he turned to address the Officer. But before he could respond was enveloped in a swift flash of light, prompting him to wince and cover his crystal-eyes.

“What the deuce!?” He snarled furiously. “Is this form of attack? Flash, eh, eh? This is the last straw, officer!I’ll have your badge for this, see if I don’t! I’ll file charges! I-!”

“Cool your claws, Lyell, it was just a translation spell.” Carson rolled his eyes at the Sableye’s antics. “Now the ponies can actually understand the gibberish that comes outta the hole you call a mouth.”

Lyell blinked as he realized that he was no longer blind before coughing uncomfortably and straightening out his suit. “Ah... yes. Right. Well then...” He then flashed a cocky grin at Officer Jenny. “To respond to your horrendous allegations...” He clicked his briefcase open and proffered a sheet of paper from it. “The internet is- or should I say was?- a most wonderful place!”

The Talonflame glared at the diploma as though it were a particularly repugnant Trubbish, barely keeping herself from lashing out at it with her talons before the Dark-Ghost type put it away.

“Either way!” Lyell turned to address the Unicorn chief. “I am Mister Earnshaw’s legal representative. Admittedly, I have been forced to utilize human representatives in the past due to Pokemon not being allowed to hold legal positions, but I do assure you, my knowledge on legal matters is of extremely high quality! More than enough to defend Mister Earnshaw.”

Peace Keeper stared at the Poke-lawyer contemplatively for a moment before casting a look at Jasper. “Mister Earnshaw, are you sure that this is the path you want to take? Asking for a lawyer...”

“I do in fact realize the connotations of such a request, Chief Peace Keeper,” The Honchkrow made to raise his wing placatingly, but winced as he was reminded of how said limbs were currently restrained. “But you simply must understand, I was and still am a cautious businessman who, like it or not, has been involved in numerous legal proceedings in the past. It has been my experience that in order to achieve the best results in such matters, I and my associates must leave things to trusted professionals. Lyell is a professional who I trust above all else, and thus I will allow him to speak on my behalf. I am sorry if this earns your distrust, but I must err on the side of caution.”

Peace Keeper nodded slowly before eyeing Lyell. “And what of you, Mister Litigant? Are you sure you’re properly accustomed to perform your job here? After all Equestrian laws-”

“-Are actually shockingly similar to those we had back in Sinnoh!” Lyell smirked as he dug a pamphlet out of his pocket with the words ‘Know Your Rights’ on the front. “I’ve learned how to speed-read out of necessity, you see. Quite the interesting read, but as far as I can tell, at their cores, apart from a few minute differences, most of the laws of Equestria mirror those of Sinnoh. As such, I can say with confidence that yes I can legally represent Mister Earnshaw. With your approval of course.”

The unicorn was silent as he thought over the situation. Glancing over at the two foreign officials, he noted the way they were both shaking their heads frantically. Finally he came to a decision.

“Very well then.”

Jenny and Growlithe slapped their wings and paws to their faces respectively.

“Fantastic!” Lyell’s grin widened by several teeth before he turned his head away and brought his hand up to cover his mouth. “Oh, do please excuse my expression. It’s a species-specific condition, all we Sableyes can do is grin and frown, no in between.”

“Right...” Peace Keeper nodded before waving his hoof. “Well then... are you aware of the charges being pressed against your client?”

“Hmph!” Lyell sniffed as his grin immediately inverted into a deep frown. “Indeed I do. Arson, assault, battery, I’ve heard it all before. And I can assure you, the charges are just as fraudulent as they were every time before!”

The unicorn raised his eyebrows in shock. “Fraudulent?”

Jenny’s feathers ruffled as she took a step forwards. “Chief-!”

“I’ll thank you to keep your infernal cakehole shut, Officer Jenny!” Lyell snapped over his shoulder before looking back at Peace Keeper. “Yes, chief, ‘fraudulent’. As the good officer has so obviously told you, yes these charges have been brought up against Mister Earnshaw time and time again, yes, but!” He stuck up a finger definitively. “There are a few facts that she has not informed you of!”

“Really...” Peace Keeper frowned as he regarded the flustered Talonflame. “Is this true, Officer Jenny?”

Jenny flinched as she glanced around nervously. “Ah... well... you see Chief...”

“Yes, Officer Jenny!” Lyell grinned eagerly as he stepped up to her, his eyes flashing eagerly. “See, there’s one little detail about each and every one of those cases that I consider to be extremely pertinent! Something about how they all concluded, something specific...” He snapped his claws as he thought. “What was the word, what was the word... how did each and every last case end?”

“...acquittal?” Growlithe whispered miserably.

“ACQUITTAL!” Lyell bellowed, throwing his hands up in the air. “Yes, that’s the word! Ac! Quit! Tal! In each and every case, Mister Earnshaw was acquitted! Cut loose! Set free as a Flying-Type! And why might I ask?!”

“...lack of evidence...” Jenny grumbled sourly.

“LACK OF EVIDENCE!” Lyell repeated, a derisive sneer obvious in his voice. “A LACK OF EVIDENCE! A complete and utter lack of connection between these crimes and this fine, upstanding, law-abiding citizen! He has done nothing but help and aid the city of Veilstone, and its citizens!” The Sabeleye’s grin widened eagerly. “And I suspect that is the exact goal of whatever person might actually be committing these crimes.”

“Don’t even think about it, Litigant!” Jenny snarled.

“What are you talking about, Mister Litigant?” Peace Keeper leaned forwards attentively.

Lyell grinned wider and wider as he placed his hands on the desk and leaned forwards. “The victims in every. Single. Case that my client has been accused of... were criminals.”

“LITIGANT!” Jenny roared. “DON’T YOU DARE!”

“Officer Jenny, calm yourself or I will have you and Growlithe removed!” Peace Keeper ordered firmly before looking back at Lyell. “Go on.”

“Criminals and their Pokemon, beaten to a pulp and left for the police to apprehend and arrest.” The Darkness Pokemon hissed through his smile. “Warehouses linked back to gangs and the drugs inside them, burned to the ground. Never a single civilian victim. These so-called ‘crimes’ have benefited Veilstone city as a whole. Why, they are not so much ‘crimes’ as they are acts of charity! There was not a person alive who wanted them to stop!”

He slowly turned and leered at the furious Fire-Flying Type. “Except... for her. Officer Jenny here has been doggedly pursuing these cases, and despite the obvious advantage they grant to our fair city, and despite her repeated inability to ever even remotely bind my client to a single case, she has, consistently and without fail, pursued him in an effort to arrest him without good reason! I can’t for the unlife of me explain this obsession of hers, but I can guarantee you this: it is entirely and utterly unfounded!”

“You. Little. Demon.” Officer Jenny growled darkly.

“Officer Jenny-!” Peace Keeper started.

“No, you listen to me, Chief!” Jenny pushed past the still-grinning Lyell and slammed her wings on the table. “These four? They are scum! Complete. And utter. Scum! I have not been pursuing them without reason! Look, if you’ll just listen to me-!”

“I’ve heard enough, Officer Jenny.” Peace Keeper cut her off coldly before regarding Jasper, his horn lighting up as he removed the cuffs from the Honchkrow’s wings. “Mister Earnshaw, you can consider the charges dropped. You and your Pokemon are free to go.”

Jenny’s beak dropped open and her face morphed into an expression of pure horror as Carson let out a victorious laugh, accompanied by Bartleby and Lyell’s respectively rumbling and hissing chuckles. Jasper merely smiled kindly and nodded in acknowledgment as he rubbed his freed wings. “I am much obliged, Chief.”

Peace Keeper nodded in acknowledgment before levelling a flat glare at Officer Jenny. “As for you, Officer. I don’t know how you did things back in Veilstone, but I will not, repeat, not condone an obsessive witch-hunt for a vigilante, especially if-!”

“VIGILANTE!?” Officer Jenny shrieked furiously, snapping her wings up and shaking the unicorn by his shoulders. “JASPER EARNSHAW IS THE CRIME-LORD OF VEILSTONE CITY!”

“Officer Jenny-!” Peace Keeper started as he batted her hooves off, but was interrupted.

“I-it’s true, sir!” Growlithe barked, glancing nervously at Carson before continuing. “H-he’s known as Jasper Earnshaw in higher circles, b-but in the streets, a-and with the p-police, he has another n-name... J-Jasper ‘The Gentleman’ Earnshaw’. Because h-he always acts p-polite whenever he d-does business...”

“And he does all sorts of business.” Jenny breathed darkly. “Earnshaw Shipping smuggled metric tons of narcotics and controlled substances at a time to other regions and countries. Said narcotics, home-grown and cooked I might add, were then sold by criminals under Earnshaw’s employ, both abroad and locally. And that’s not to mention the protection rackets and illegal gambling rings he ran in the city proper, plus all the times he helped criminals escape from the law! Those gangbangers he attacked, he did so because they weren’t playing by his rules and selling things his way! Those warehouses and drugs he burned, he did so to harm rival gangs!”

Officer Jenny snapped a wing back to point at the Honchkrow who had been smiling contentedly throughout her tirade. “I will admit to an obsession, sure. But let’s be clear: my obsession is not with the crimes, it’s with the criminal. I am obsessed with convicting Jasper ‘The Gentleman’ Earnshaw, the kingpin of crime in Veilstone City. And I am obsessed with him because of how he has consistently taunted us, taunted me. I want this bastard behind bars because he keeps rubbing the fact that he always gets away in my face! That is why I am obsessed with him!”

Peace Keeper worked his jaw silently before turning his head to gaze at the Honchkrow with no small amount of horror. “Is... this true?”

Jasper was expressionless for a moment... until he grinned contentedly and tilted his head to the side slightly. “I do believe that my lawyer said it himself, Mister Keeper. I was acquitted of these crimes by a jury of my peers due to a lack of evidence. I do believe that should suffice as proof of my innocence, no?”

The unicorn paled drastically as his mouth hung open. “Son of a diamond dog bitch-!”

“Well!” Jasper chirped as he hopped off his seat, extending his wing and gladly accepting his cane back from his Banette. “I do believe this concludes our business here! Now then, I do believe it’s time we be off. Those in favor? Mister Capo?”

The zipper-mouthed Ghost-Type hopped off his seat and stood at attention by Jasper’s side. “Yes, Mister Earnshaw.”

“Mister Bartholomew?”

The Snorlax grunted as he rose to his feet, adjusting his fedora slightly. “‘Course, Mister Earnshaw.”

“Mister Litigant?”

The Sableye’s smirk widened to face-splitting proportions as he picked up his briefcase and readjusted his tie. “Indeed, Mister Earnshaw.”

“Then it is unanimous!” Jasper brought the curve of his cane up to his plumage and nodded respectfully at Peace Keeper. “Thank you ever so much for your hospitality, but we have decided to take our leave. After all, you did say yourself that we were ‘free to go’, so unless you intend to charge us with anything, we'll be on our way. Good day to you officers, I hope we can meet again under better circumstances. Mister Bartholomew, the door if you please.”

Bartholomew grunted in acknowledgment as he let the door swing open. Earnshaw nodded appreciatively at him as he hopped his way out, Capo following close behind and casting a venomous look over his shoulder as he went. Litigant, however, stopped in the doorway in order to cast a final grin at the two. “By the way, Officer Jenny, just so you know, I fully intend to file a restraining order so that you cannot come within one hundred yards of Mister Earnshaw. Erring on the side of caution, you understand.”

Jenny growled furiously, but before she could respond, she was cut off.

“Actually, Mister Litigant, could you do me a favor and reduce that distance to a mere five yards?” Jasper inquired politely. “After all, it would be such a shame if I were unable to see the good Officer again.”

“Of course, Mister Earnshaw, of course.” Litigant waved his hand in acceptance.

Bartholomew made to move through the door and close it behind him...

“Wait.”

When he was cut off by a flat, droning voice.

“Wh- you’re going with him!?” Peace Keeper sputtered incredulously as Maud started to trot towards the door. “After everything he just admitted to!?”

Maud glanced back at the chief before shrugging indifferently and continuing forwards.

Once she was out, Bartleby stepped through the door and prepared to close it. But before he could, Earnshaw waved his wing a final time. “Farewell, Officer Jenny. I do so look forwards to meeting you again!”

Jenny’s furious shriek was interrupted by Bartholomew slamming the doors shut.

“Well she was pleasant as always...” Litigant muttered through his frown.

“Do you happen to like her?” Maud asked bluntly.

“Wh-with her!?” The Honchkrow squawked before hastily composing himself. “Don’t even try and joke about that. Arceus above, you’ll give me a heart attack...” He muttered cynically to himself as he started to walk out of the precinct, followed closely by the rest of his group.

“To answer your question.” Capo took one of his nails out of his mouth and waved it about. “The reason why Mister Earnshaw so taunts Officer Jenny has absolutely nothing to do with romantic involvement. Suffice to say, he enjoys her reactions. She, she amuses him. Like a Pyroar or a Persian in a cage. Believe me...” The Banette chuckled as he bit down on the nail once anew. “He already had us promise to smack some sense in him or anyone else who got involved with someone like her in a romantic way. Bad for business, that kinda attraction.”

Maud hummed in understanding.

The group was silent as they finally exited the chaotic building and began walking aimlessly down the sidewalk. Finally, after traversing a few snowy blocks, Maud brought her hoof up to Jasper’s shoulder, directing him into a nearby alleyway. The natural Pokemon tensed slightly, but didn’t act due to Jasper’s signalling them to remain still. Bartholomew’s girth filled the majority of the alley entrance, with Capo and Litigant standing in front of him, their stances obviously menacing.

Maud ignored the three of them in favor of staring neutrally at Earnshaw. “Everything that officer said back there. Was that true?”

Earnshaw was silent for a moment before bowing his head slightly and raising the handle of his cane to his plumage. “Indeed it is. My business is... quite unscrupulous.” He raised his eyebrow at the earth pony. “Will that be an issue in any further relations between us?”

Maud was contemplatively silent for a few minutes before responding. “No, it won’t. I don’t like it, but student loans are expensive. Will I be paid if I stay with you?”

“If you so desire.” Earnshaw replied evenly.

“Good.” Maud nodded. “There’s just one condition.” Suddenly, moving faster than any of the onlookers had thought possible of her, Maud slammed Earnshaw against the alley wall, holding her foreleg against his throat.

In response, Bartholomew bared his fangs and rumbled viciously, Capo snapped all three of his nails from his mouth and lit them up in violet energy and Litigant’s eyes started to shine malevolently.

However, all three were instantly silenced and halted by Earnshaw snapping his cane up at them. “Don’t even think of moving!” He ordered firmly, despite his voice being a bit choked. He then regarded Maud inquiringly. “What condition.”

Maud leaned in close, her face cold and hard. “No. Business. In Ponyville. Ever.”

Earnshaw studied her intently before asking “Why.”

“That’s where my sister and her friends live.” Maud replied flatly.

Earnshaw contemplated that statement for a minute or so before nodding. “Very well. I can live with that. No business in Ponyville. Ever.” He gasped in relief when Maud removed her leg from his neck.

Maud didn’t react while the Honchkrow regained his breath. And she didn’t react when Capo wrapped his arm around his neck and jabbed one of his nails against his own neck. “Let’s be clear here, Miss Maud.” The Banette hissed furiously. “If you ever, ever treat Mister Earnshaw like that again, we will each make you go through the worst kind of hell you can possibly imagine. And believe you me, we have practice in that particular area of expertise. Capiche?”

Maud turned her eye to look at the Ghost Type, but otherwise didn’t react.

“Mister Capo.” Earnshaw ordered firmly.

The Banette released his hold on the earth pony’s neck and held his hands up as he backed away slowly. “I’m just making sure Miss Maud understands her position and treats you with proper respect in the future, Mister Earnshaw. I don’t mean any harm by it.”

“Yes, well, do try and do it more politely in the future, Mister Capo. After all...” Earnshaw regarded Maud neutrally. “Miss Maud will be working with us in the foreseeable future. Correct?”

Maud was silent for a moment before nodding slowly. “Yes, Mister Earnshaw.”

Jasper smiled pleasantly and nodded. “Glad to hear it.”

“Ahem...” Litigant cleared his throat as he adjusted one of his gem-eyes. “That’s all well and good, but, Mister Earnshaw, I must ask... what are our plans for the future, sir?”

“We tryin’ to find our way home?” Bartholomew grunted.

The Honchkrow regarded his associates quietly before shaking his head and folding his wings over his cane. “No. Should a means of returning to Sinnoh be discovered, it will be by some intrepid, go-getting do-gooder. I intend to play the long game, under the assumption that we will be remaining here indefinitely. As such, we have two priorities: establishing a power-base with which to restart our business, and of course, locating the rest of our family. With any luck, accomplishing the prior will aid us in locating Misters Beatty and Scourge and Miss Maven, wherever they might be.”

“That’s all well and good, Mister Earnshaw, but ah, there’s one problem with that...” Capo chewed on his nails. “We’re strangers in a strange land, with no reputation, no money, and no power. How are we going to get a base when we don’t have anywhere to stand in the first place?”

“It’s simple, Mister Capo,” Earnshaw let his beak raise into a grin as he raised his cane and pointed upwards. “We utilize natural resources.”

The four tilted their heads back and stared up at where he was pointing.

The nails nearly slid out of Capo’s mouth as he clutched his fedora in shock. “Sweet Darkrai...”

Bartholomew swallowed heavily as he scratched under his hat. “Huh boy...”

“This is... ah... oh Giratina help me...” Litigant fiddled with his tie nervously.

Maud merely cocked an eyebrow.

“Glad you all agree.” Earnshaw chuckled darkly.

Author's Note

EDIT 1/12/2015: Added in a line with Officer Jenny about Jasper helping criminals escape the police that I forgot to put in originally.