Some Things You Just Can't Explain...

by RadMax

Rating: mature
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, Comedy, Romance
Length: 2194

Well here I am... In Equestria... Pretty cliche if you ask me.

Some people who go through a traumatic event most the time don't want to find them self waking up in a world full of ponies. WELL that sucks for Bryson! As that is exactly what happens to him. So join him on his "journey" in Equestria full of smart ass ponies and other things that just need to shut the hell up.

Hey this is my first fic. so yeah any advice is greatly appreciated.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-01-11 05:20:02 UTC

Stuff Happens My Friend...

Ch. 1: Stuff happens my friend...

"OK, OK! Jees relax... Yes I'm speaking into the microphone," I quickly tapped on the mic,"Is this thing even on? Oh good! Umm... Hi... I guess yeah I'm bad at these kind of things so, I guess I should start at the beginning right?"

" Yeah that WOULD be ideal but, really you could start anywhere."

Shrugging with a sigh, "Thanks smart ass because thats what I was going to do any ways," sometimes I wonder where I'd be with out her.

"Some where miserable most likely."

"DAMN IT DON'T DO THAT!"  Seriously, "Something tells me this is gonna take a while... Any way where was I? Right to the story!"

***

"Hey Bryson, are you even paying attention?"

"What? Oh umm.. the answer is 45," I said smugly towards my teacher, whom quite clearly was thinking I wasn't paying attention.

"Correct!" Hells Yeah, "And Congrats on winning the trip to Montana!" WHAT?!?! "I know thats its not ideal at the time, but you can decrease the amount of time you have to attend college if you go on this trip. Besides maybe you can learn more about the types of injuries that can occur there, like mauling and other wonderful things like it!" No your just glad that I'd be leaving for the time being! "I wish you luck in your next two years of study." Shiiiiiiiii...

"Mam He wasn't even paying attention! Because if you were paying attention you would have seen that he was playing LoL!" Well she has a point, so listen to to her!

"I had noticed that he was doing other things but he still had correctly answered the question," Dammit! "buuuut the competition did say they would take multiple people and no one in the previous class had correctly answered it... so I guess I could send you as well if you had answered the problem Correctly." You guess hmm? Na you want her gone either to watch me and keep me out of trouble or cause you don't like her either I thought to my self sinking deeper into my chair.

"Really?!" Oh shit she got it right, "because here is my work with the answer as 45!" Fucking called it!

"Awe thats wonderful!" I said for all to hear, Why? Because screw them.

"Well everything is in order I just have to put the names on your tickets for the flight and and apartment will be shared between the two of you," We both stood up at the same time about to argue in protest before we were so rudely cut off, "Class dismissed! I'd like to speak to you two privately," sulking, I sat in my desk and waited for the rest of the class to leave for lunch.

"So might I ask why me and her are going to be in the same apartment?" I asked rather abruptly before she could speak.

"A good question Bry," God I hate that nickname that the teachers gave me, "You two are in the same apartment because I was only given two apartments and the other classes besides the one I spoke of earlier had some one answer the question. Thus filling the other apartment so really you two should be glad that you get a three room, two bath,

1,500 square foot house to yourselves!" Oh joyous me!

"I don't care if it's Buckingham Palace!" The shoutable, screamed grabbing the teacher's collar, "I'm not staying the same house or apartment as him!"

"Why I'm not that bad looking," I said jokingly trying to ease the tension in the air, "besides I'm already in a relationship so nothing is going to happen between us, Okay?" I said lying.

Relaxing a bit she released the teacher "None?"

"None," I said sighing a little on the inside, "I swear."

"Okay," Oh thank Christ! "but rules will be placed."

"Fine," Because I had some rules of my own that needed to be placed as well that involved naps and sea salt a vinegar chips, "besides This should be fun right?" I said looking over at my teacher for reassurance.

"Yeah, Should be a lot of fun!" She said in the most unconvincing tone ever, "Oh and I should tell you that your plane leaves in 3 hours. I will excuse your classes and the other students left at lunch so you two get to sit next to each other!"

Did I ever explain how much I hate this woman.

***

"Hurry up we're gonna miss the plane!"

"Look if I can't finish my coffee then I'm going to be extremely upset!" Typical white girl.

"Oh and we DEFINITELY would NOT want that..." Breath Bryson breath.

"No you would not," Looking at my watch I noticed we had a half an hour left till we had to board. Sighing I looked over at where we needed to be and where we were and remembering why you hate traveling with people in airports, "Ok done."

"Jesus! Finally!"

"Hey, he died for your sins!" Oh good lord not one of these.

"What ever, lets just go," Making our way over to the boarding line we waited for about 20 minutes, then after handing over our tickets and boarding the plane someone decided that they needed to be a pain in the ass.

"What if the plane crashes? How will our families react? Is there an afterlife? Who is right in what the afterlife is like?" SEE? Pain the ass.

"Look the Plane is not gonna crash and who cares who is right, and its not like you've lived a bad life right?" I said praying to who ever would listen, that logic would calm her the fuck down.

Relaxing a bit she agree and then after we took our seats preparing to begin our lives in close quarters for an extended period of time as our teacher said before we left her room. Shortly the plane took off and began it's ascension into the sky and I don't know what it was about the flight attendant's look on her face but it was not happy when we hit the turbulence. funny lasted I checked it was crystal clear out.

A little while later one of the flight attendants brought the drink cart over by me and hastily I ordered a Coke. What we all have our drinks for stress, yours might be Jack Daniels but mine is Coke. After pouring my drink she asked Miss PITA what she would like,and lets just say that apparently this woman has never flown before because she ordered some chemistry project of a drink that, bless the ladies heart, politely told her that they could not make that then offered her a ginger ale.

"Fine..." good lord does she always get what she wants? Most likely.

"Here you are mam."

"Thank you." she said as the flight attendant left. Then quickly looked at me dead in the eyes, "Ok Bryson What do you wanna talk about?"

"Nothing," I said hastily plugging in my headphones to try and drown her out. only to have them Yanked out, "What!?"

"Well I wanna talk to you ok, besides its gonna be a long trip so might as well get to know one another," When did she get a nice side?

"Maybe when we get the... What the hell was that?" I said as the turbulence suddenly came back only this time managing to actually spill the guy across the isle's drink.

"Well I don't know Turbulence," Thanks smart ass.

"I Know that... HOLY SHIT THE WING IS CRACKING!" No sooner than I had said that the captain threw on the seat belt sign and the wing came flying off.

"BRYSON I THOUGHT YOU SAID THE PLANE WASN'T GONNA CRASH!"

"Well how was I supposed to know the fucking wing was gonna come off!" Shit gotta think fast.. a who am I kidding we are all fucked.

"Everyone watch out for th-" Wellp powers out now, wait that means no cabin pressure SHIT!

"Watch for the glass!" I barked out just before over half the windows imploded into the cabin as the plane ripped in half. Yes in mother fucking half, and right in front of me too. Did not see that coming.

"BBBRRRYYYSSSOOONNN!!!" That was the last thing I heard be for my seat belt broke ejecting me into the open air.

"SSSSSHHHHHIIIIITTTTT!!!" I screamed as I continued to free fall towards the fast approaching ground. At least I lived a good life, I told myself before disappearing into a cloud and blacking out.

The part where I freak out

Pain... For some reason it was greatly lacking. "Ugg... Where the hell am I?" I asked myself trying to sit up. As I looked around i noticed quite a few things right off the bat. One this was not a hospital, two I was alive but not it some cartoonish hole, and finally it was dark as fuck with a little light coming through the cracks of what I assumed was a door.

"Ah don't know 'bout this one sugarcube... Ya don't see to sure 'bout this one," Holy balls that's a heavy accent. I mean damn Country singers would be jealous of that. Wait what was I doing? Right getting up.

"Agreed... What do you mean you found something?"

Listening in further I found out that there seven people in the room all but one where female maybe two all asking the one really the same question to no avail.. "If you won't tell us what IT is then can you show us?"

"Umm... Right now it's kinda a unconscious," Wait are they talking about me, and why am I now an it? "I guess I could show you myself," Yep they're talking about me as an it and I don't like it so please, open the door and see what will happen.

No sooner than when said person opened the door  to show her friends what she was talking about I burst out into the room, But really I wish that I had stayed. "SWEET BUTTERY JESUS WHAT THE FUCK ARE THINGS?" Horses, fucking horses man.

"Might we ask the same?" Holy shit did it just talk to me? And it's flying too! Plus why are you so calm!

"Nope! Have a great day bye!" I shouted as I ran out the open door leading outside.

"Hey don't go out there! Oh no..." FUUUUUUUUCK! There's more of them and they're so brightly colored!

All I could think were horses... Horses everywhere, and that I needed to get the fuck outta Dodge fast. Running as fast I could I continued to run down what looked like a street. Why you may ask? Because mother fucking logic said to thats why. Every time I ran past a building one of the would point scream, and cause a ruckus. Then next thing I know everywhere I turned more of them would try to see the strange thing running around only to then turn tail and run the other way themselves.

" Wow you are kinda fast for only having two legs and being on the ground," Why thank you! Track really helped in that... Wait what? "Gotcha!"

"Not today!" I shouted ducking down causing miss show off to miss and fall behind a bit and give me a chance to try and run  harder.

"What the?" She said getting back on course and then continuing chase. Well when you announce it to the world then of course I'm gonna know when to dodge you stupid!

Gotta go fast! Not right now maybe later. Ok where to next? "Look we just wanna talk!"

"Does it look I give a damn!?" I yelled behind when suddenly I saw the original bunch about 100 feet away spread across the street except one, who was hiding behind purple looking fella. When naturally I started to slow down to turn away and go down some side street, someone else had other ideas.

"Gotcha!" only this time I had no Time to react. When I say it was all a blur, well... I saw a flash of blue then I noticed that was flying through the air and then I collided with the ground about 10 feet later and stopped rolling about 5 feet away from who i assumed was the pack of seven's leader.

"Who are you?" I crooked Slowly. You now that pain I was talking about that seemed to be lacking? Found it!

"My name is Twilight Sparkle. And these are my friends..."

"Ye-Yeah thats great thanks. Next question, where am I?" I said panting desperately trying to not pass out.

"Equestria silly!" Thank you ecstatic bright pink horse. Hold on... One am I actually talking to them? Two they fucking speak perfect english! And three what the hell is equestria?

"t-thanks... you guys don't mind if I pass out right? Great thanks," Welcome my friends state of unconsciousness and darkness how ya been? Geez its been like 20 minutes since I last saw you. Well look on the bright side Bryson pain left.