Cervine Wings

"Do you know why the sun rises and sets, Arry?" She looked up into her father's eyes, curious. "Far across the ocean, in the land called Equestria, there is a pony princess named Celestia. She is an alicorn: the strongest of ponies. She is responsible for moving the sun and bringing forth day and night. She does this for the entire world."

"Wow..." She felt her eyes go wide. A single pony could do all that? She furrowed her brow in thought and rubbed the stumps on her head. She wished her antlers would grow faster, and had a habit of messing with them while thinking. "But... why help everyone? Can't other people help where they live too?"

Her father chuckled. "Yes, maybe they could help. But there is only one sun, and in the end I think it is easier this way. Celestia has taken it upon herself to govern the heavens. I think she does it because she wants to be helpful to everyone, not just to her own ponies."

"She sounds nice. I want to be like her when I grow up!" She beamed at her father, hoping to be praised for her ambition. He laughed and took her to get some ice cream.

"But I don't like this music." She gave a halfhearted kick at one of the drums sitting in front of her, producing a small 'thwump'. "These drums are boring. Can't you just tell me more stories about adventures?"

"No, dear." Her mother patted her on the head. She growled and tried to move away. "A young fawn needs variety in their life. Percussion is one of the most traditional of Deeryneian musical styles. It's good for you to practice your rhythm and coordination."

"But why do I need that stuff? I don't like it."

"Please, dear, stop complaining so much. It isn't proper for a peryton of your standing. Anyway, appreciation for music is worthwhile in its own right, but what you practice here can even help with the martial or arcane arts as well. Mastery of the many facets of life requires a holistic approach."

"Can't I practice changeling music instead? That minstrel that was visiting last week had interesting-"

"Absolutely not, and I'm surprised you even heard that. It was not suitable for a fawn of your age. Now, practice these sheets, I'll be back to check on you tonight. Please don't bother your watchers too much this time."

She grumbled and crossed her forelegs. "I'm not a baby..."

"Miss Arradalis, why are you sitting in that treetop?" She glanced down to see one of her teachers staring back at her. She quickly rubbed her eyes and sniffed a few times, trying to hide the evidence of her crying.

"N-nothing. You're just jealous of my wings, aren't you." It was less a question and more an accusation.

Her teacher raised her eyebrow. "Would you like to come down and tell me what happened?"

She hesitated for a minute, looking down at her teacher, up at the sky, and back a few times, before slowly nodding. "Uh-huh."

She flew to the ground and walked up to her teacher, who she allowed to put a hoof across her shoulders. "Now, what is wrong."

She sniffed again. "There were some other fawns playing with a jump-rope. I told them to let me have a turn so I could show them I was better at it, but they didn't listen. I tried to order them again but one of them called me mean and snooty."

"Why were you ordering them instead of asking nicely?"

She gaped at her teacher. "Because I'm a peryton! My family is the leaders of the whole forest! I'm in charge of those commoner brats!"

"Arradalis! That is no way to speak of your peers!"

She felt her face heating up. "But they aren't my peers, are they?"

Her teacher sighed heavily. "Your family has power, yes, but leadership is a responsibility. The other deer listen to your family and give it's members power because they trust them to lead effectively. If you abuse that trust, for example by demanding that the others grant you special favors, they might decide not to listen to you and take away the very power you are trying to use. It is better to treat others nicely and with respect."

"That's not fair!" What, being a leader was suddenly a popularity contest? What if the people didn't like the leader for doing something that was important but mean? What good was being powerful if power can't be used?

"It actually is. I'm sorry that you had a bad experience with the other fawns, but you were not behaving appropriately. Now, we should get going: you're almost late for your history lessons."

"Why are these made of foam?" She shook from side-to-side, watching her "spear" wobble violently in its harness.

"Your father has said that you are too young to train with real weapons. He even forbade wooden ones until you were older and more experienced." Her martial instructor fitted his own foam spear to its harness and began testing its weight and speed.

"What is a foam 'spear' even good for?" She scowled and hit a nearby tree with the side of her weapon, watching it fold in a very non-threatening manner.

"Now now, you don't always have to be so pessimistic, Arry. We can practice form and accuracy with these. Once you graduate to more dangerous weapons, you'll be much less likely to get hurt if you have some basic knowledge and muscle memory to work off of."

She pouted as she stepped up to her side of the jousting field. "This is ridiculous."

"Sometimes life is ridiculous. Now, I think we'll start with the Lapisite style favored in the old Crystal Empire. The goal here is actually to avoid breaking your own crystal lance more than anything, so accuracy and positioning are very important. We'll do a quick test run to get you started, then I'll go over the weak-points you would find on the standard uniform."

She was sitting at the foot of her bed, sulking. She was busy chipping into the wood of the bed frame with her hoof when she heard a knock on her door. A moment later, her father entered the room. "Hello Arry."

She grumbled and glanced at him out of the corner of her eyes. "Hi Father." She whispered.

"Do you know why I'm here?" She shrank down and averted her eyes. "You're teachers tell me that you are still not paying attention during lessons. You keep getting distracted, or running off, or starting arguments."

"It's not my fault if they won't teach me the things I want to learn. If they want my attention they shouldn't abuse it." That was how things worked, after all. If people didn't like you, they wouldn't give you power over them.

Her father just sighed. "I don't enjoy interrupting my day to reprimand you. I'm expecting you to put more effort into your studies. If I continue to hear that you are neglecting them, I may have to do something more than just scold you."

She shrugged. "Yeah, okay."

He just watched her for several seconds until she started fidgeting under his gaze. "I might have to ban you from your workshop if this keeps up."

She gasped. Her workshop was one of the few places where she could do what she wanted. "What? But... but that's-"

He held up a hoof. "If you can't control yourself, then we'll just have to do it for you. Put more effort into your studies and we won't have to talk about this again." He left, closing the door behind him.

She groaned and planted her face into her pillow. "Yeah, it isn't like you control me enough already..."

She grinned at her reflection, admiring the jewelry her mother had adorned her antlers with. She was proud of the branching pattern they had grown into, and the rings and chains of precious metals now hooked between them made her feel important.

She was less enthused with the dress her mother was currently fussing over, directing servants to tighten this, loosen that, and readjust everything else. She didn't care for how restricting it felt; at least armor or a cloak had the benefit of protecting or hiding her, but this was entirely ornamental. Still, the dress was pretty. She supposed it could be worse.

Thankfully, she'd only had to endure half an hour more before her mother had been satisfied and let her remove the dress. It had only taken a small amount of pleading to let her keep the jewelry on for the day as well. "Come along dear. You've been patient and cooperative, so now we can go visit the beach."

She almost couldn't believe her ears. She could visit the sea! And see and hear the waves! And smell the salt in the air! "Oh thank you thank you! This is the best!"

Her mother managed to calm her down long enough to have her cast a basic protection spell on her jewelry so it wouldn't fall off or get tarnished, and then they were off.

It was nice to be able to relax for a day. She played in the waves, and tried shaping sand into various sculptures. She managed to make some nice looking mountains, but her attempts at a tree and at antlers, unfortunately, were doomed from the start. Later, her mother brought a cloud out over the water, and they sat together and rested, enjoying the sound of the waves.

She always loved the sea.

History was one of her least favorite subjects. When it wasn't boring and useless, it was depressing and tended to make her angry. Unfortunately, today was not a day for her to be bored.

"Per what little survived the cataclysm of Everdark, we know that perytons originally had their own kingdom, an island nation know as Antlentis. Masters of the sky and sea, the Antlentians were regarded as one of the most noble and respected of the ancient Deeryneian kingdoms."

The lesson went on for some time. She was glad to be learning more about her heritage, but she wasn't stupid. She knew Antlentis was no more, so she knew there was probably not going to be a happy ending for this lesson. Sure enough, her teacher eventually started lecturing on the nation's downfall.

"Exact details are sparse, as Everdark and the times leading up to it were filled with strife and chaos. What we have managed to determine, however, is that Antlentis was called upon by their friends in the Deeryneian Alliance to provide aid during one of the many wars with ancient Ordinat. They prepared to mobilize their forces, but the Alikeros somehow divined their intentions, launching a preemptive strike upon the island."

"They attacked before they even started fighting? Why?!" Ordinat sounded like a nation of blackguards.

"It seems that Antlentis was in possession of particularly powerful weapons. Ordinat had suffered from these weapons before, and did not want to give Antlentis the chance to deploy them. However, Ordinat had destructive power of its own: whether by some powerful magic or by sheer physical effort, the island was somehow destroyed utterly. Only a relatively small percentage of perytons managed to escape."

She gritted her teeth and glared at her notebook. She glanced up at her teacher, who seemed to have noticed her unhappiness. "What happened to the Alikeros?"

Her teacher grimaced and cast her eyes downward for a moment. "I am sorry, Arry. I did not intend to upset you with the lesson. If-"

"It's fine." She lied. "Just answer the question."

Her teacher sighed and shuffled her wings. "No one knows for certain. It seems the Alikeros abandoned Ordinat at the start of the Everdark, but there are records of sightings up to the very end. Afterwards, however, there is nothing. It seems they vanished with the cataclysm. The closest thing we have now is the alicorns; Celestia and her kind are said to be descendents of Alikeros magic, but we don't know enough to do more than speculate."

She tilted her head. "Why not? Does she keep her origins a secret?"

"Well, she isn't very forthcoming from what I've heard, but it's more likely that she just doesn't know very much. Most of this history is from our own archives, and, well... we don't really share much with the infernal bloodlines. I wouldn't be surprised if Celestia didn't even know much of any pre-Equestrian history. Anyway, we should move on. We can cover pre-Everdark dragons next; it will be fun!"

She stood in a corner of the hotel lobby, sipping her punch sullenly. A changeling envoy had appropriated the room for a Hearth's Warming Eve party while visiting. She had complained to her father about having to go to a party for a silly pony holiday, but he had told her that many of its messages and themes could apply to everyone, not just ponies. It would also be an insult to their guests if they didn't accept the invitation.

Personally, she'd much rather be trying new spells or drafting blueprints.

She noticed her father speaking to a changeling councilor a few feet away. She scooted a bit closer to listen in; it couldn't be more boring than the insipid music being played.

"I just had to get away from the hive for a while. I love Everlight, but when the vana are unhappy, everyling is unhappy. Labyrinth doesn't have it much better, but then they never do, do they? Ha ha!"

"It's that bad then? Do you regret your support for her ascent?"

"Oh it's not just Chrysalis. The Equestrians aren't making things easy either. Celestia has already taken almost all of the equine lands, even if this or that county is not official yet. Everlight -- and I assume this goes for the other hives as well -- is reluctant to set up operations in nearby lands because they are now taking those as well. There have already been several conflicts with diamond dogs and minotaurs over territory claims. I've even heard of them getting bold with dragons, of all creatures!"

"Ah, you don't want to waste efforts on someplace that might be changing hooves within a month."

"Precisely. Celestia's ponies just keep expanding to any land that doesn't have walls or spears keeping them back. It's almost like a vacuum. I've heard there are plans to expand even further south, too. They'll be building on top of our hives eventually, if they even realize it."

"Well, the only thing I can think of would be to set up some diplomatic channels, but I know your leaders are pushing for secrecy more than ever. I can only wish your people the best of luck."

The changeling laughed. "Oh, don't worry. I know what you're afraid of, and I think Dwimorholt has enough history of taking in refugees for now."

"W-well I-"

"Calm down, friend, 'twas only jest. Hey, we have some desserts from Zebrica; you should try some."

She stared at the ceiling of her room. She felt... wrong, but the ceiling provided her no answers. She was unhappy with her life. She was unhappy with a lot of things, really. Her parents seemed so restrictive with her. They said they wanted the best for her, but it didn't seem to matter what she wanted. She was rarely able to spend much time with them, but these days it was a blessing more than a curse: she didn't have to worry about being scolded, or judged, or "encouraged" if they weren't around.

They didn't take her seriously, not really. No one else did either. She was "just a fawn". Don't let her out of sight. Keep her away from anything even remotely risky. Make sure she follows her schedules. Make sure her shoulders are always straight and her tongue is always held.

And for what? So she could sit in some fancy house, posing for pictures and "hosting" parties? Get married off to some important deer or another and have some more peryton children to annoy her so that the elders would feel a bit safer about the future of the family? Sit idle and grow old while mourning the lost glory of her people?

No one was doing anything to fix it. All the other deer seemed content to just fade further into irrelevance, hiding in their trees. And she couldn't do anything either: anything she proposed would undoubtedly be overruled by the cowards in charge, and she would just get reprimanded again.

It didn't seem like a life worth living to her. She tried to think it through from different angles, but after wasting a couple more hours of the night, she could only come back to a single point: The path she was on would only leave her unhappy.

The only option, then, was to find a new path.