My Cute Classmate Is A Horse?!

by Regina Wright

Rating: teen
Tags: Original Character, Comedy, Fluttershy, Slice of Life, Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2146

Fluttershy goes to anime school. Loser male protagonist tries to surmount the odds of his loser life. A light novel parody

Miharu Oushima finds his life turned upside-down when he comes to the realization that his classmate, Fluttershy, might actually be a horse.

Written in a anime-ish, light novel style.

Published 2015-01-13 00:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-01-13 00:10:02 UTC

The OVA

I was just drinking some Happoshu, low-malt beer with my big brother, Shijiro when a thought suddenly came to me. Fluttershy-san was a horse. It might have been the burning alcohol making my mind run but everything just made sense!

She's a horse! She must be!

“There's no way to explain it.” I slurred, trying to catch my bro's attention. The bastard's face was flushed but he hiccuped in my face, letting me know I had his attention. “But Flooter... Fluttur's a horse! She makes...” I slammed my can onto the table a few times, making the clop clop sound that follows Fluttershy-san everywhere. “And she has a tail.” I grabbed the towel on the counter and tried to tie it like her tail and started flapping it.

“And... And... Sometimes when she laughs, she neighs.”

“Oh shit,” My bro sagely nodded, gulping another swig from his can. “Horses do neigh.” He squished up his face and placed down his can. “Wait a minute? Are you saying that Fluttershy-chan is a horse?!” Shijiro exclaimed and moved forward, grabbing me by the collar and shaking me for good measure. I hated the fact that he was so taller than me. “Miharu, take that back! You can't call the lovely ladies, horses! Every girl's special in their own way. Not every girl has the BBB!”

“The BBB?”

Shijiro dropped me and fell to his knees while taking out a lighter. I think it was supposed to make his next set of words epic. And it would have been if he could actually get it to light. He kept going regardless. “The breasts, the body and the booty. Woo!” My brother praised, before shouting to the ceiling. “I'm a SLAVE~”

I stuck my fingers in my ears.

“TO THE BOODY~ WOO!” Shijiro screamed, rocking his head back and forth as he began to describe the wonderful diameters of Fluttershy's fine and plump butt she hid under her skirt. He howled for a few minutes, driving me up the wall, before he remembered he left his can on the counter. And the point I was trying to make.

“Say Miharu,” He said with a leer, holding up his hand for me to pass him his drink. I only glared at him. “Get some proof of Fluttershy-chan's horse-ness and I'd totally believe you. I might even put in a good word for you about that club of yours at the next student council meeting.”

At times like this, I can't understand how my big bro drinking liquor as a minor, perversely worshiping women's bodies and being a walking joke got to be elected as student council president. Two years in a row.

“Whatever you say, Shijiro.” I muttered and knocked his can over. The brown liquor ran down the side of the counter and my brother only wiggled his nose at me before he began to lick. What a joke.

The next day at Mishoko High, I came to school armed with my cell-phone's camera and a deep desire to out Fluttershy-san as the fraud she was. A wicked and devious talking horse. There was only so many things that I could accept gaining admittance to this school. Ghosts haunting the halls as hall-monitors. Vampires taking night classes and spraying graffiti. Werewolves picking fights and breaking out into dance numbers. Succubi~ My face turned red as I considered the girls of Class C, parading in their altered school uniforms and their garter-belts.

But a horse, a talking horse was taking things too far.

I stood near the shoe lockers, glancing around for a nice corner to hide myself in. At this point, I wasn't sure what I was looking to take a picture of but I was sure that I would know it when I saw it.

“Ooh, what are you up to, Oushima-san?” A female voice called out me, a yellow pegasus flapped her wings as she flew in front of my shot. She curled her wings to her sides, brushed off her pleated skirt and stood on her hooves to open her locker. Man, I knew I should've picked a better spot.

“I'm trying to find some evidence to prove my brother wrong.” I deadpanned, whirling around to see Fluttershy wipe her hooves and put on her school shoes. She always had so much trouble putting on her third shoe that I felt obligated help her.

She was a cute classmate of mine. The nicest even.

I bent low and kept my eyes to the floor as she lifted her hind-leg for me to assist her.

It wouldn't do to be looking up her skirt even if this was the best time to be doing so. And I certainly hadn't done it before. On purpose... Kinda... Some part of me wondered what pair of panties she was wearing today and I cursed my brother, Shijiro for good measure. I can't be thinking of girls like that.

“Is it for your club? The... um...”

“The Mundane of Mishoko.” I recited tirelessly. I didn't know why I bothered. It wasn't like she was interested. “It's a club where students can examine the supernatural and figure out the seven secrets of the school.”

“I've never seen anything supernatural.” Fluttershy-san pointed out. “And I didn't know the school had seven mysteries.”

Mysteries? I said secrets.

Why did everyone confuse the two? That's what they all said as if Mishoko wasn't known for mass disappearances, murders, missing hallways and strange accidents. I couldn't expect such a close-minded classmate to understand the many cover-ups and illegal operations that the government been performing to keep magic on the hush hush. But it wouldn't nice of me to dump all my anger towards the school's populace on Fluttershy-san.

“That's kind of the reason why I've been having a hard time getting members. The Mundane Club used to be a lot more popular but nobody is taking the weird seriously anymore.” I stated before getting back on my feet. “What are you up to, Fluttershy-san?” I asked to change the mood.

“I'm waiting for Ran and Reiko. We're supposed to go to club before class starts. I think Ran's running late.” She smiled and I caught my cue.

“And Reiko's running behind.” We laughed at the old joke.

Ran and Reiko were a pair of childhood sweethearts practically attached to the hip. They swore up and down they were reincarnated star-crossed lovers and were trying to reach compromise for some reason. They were so lovely dovey all the time that I couldn't understand what the compromise was for. Was compromise another word for 'relationship' or were they talking about coming up with the right time in their busy schedules for doing adult things?

Fluttershy-san headed off and I moved for the corner next to the main hallway. I didn't have much of a clear view of the entrance but my phone should be able to take a decent picture. A moment passed. Fluttershy-san was just here! I threw my phone to the ground and gripped at my hair.

I'd lost the chance but I wouldn't lose again!

During homeroom, Sensei Giro called out our names for roll call. Usually I'd tune out, take a pair of headphones and start listening to some tracks on my phone. Homeroom was so boring that I couldn't stand it. Most of the students kept on showing up late and Sensei Giro liked to punish everyone by starting over from the very beginning. If I had a backbone, I'd skip homeroom just like my bad brother but didn't want to show any signs of approving of his terrible behavior.

With Sensei Giro droning on and on, I noticed how the students would stand up at the sound of their name at the end of the question. They did it unquestionably as they fought off the waves of the early morning and the allure of resting their sleepy heads on their desks. I felt that there was something I could use here. I glanced around the room and pin-pointed Fluttershy-san's desk and my suspicious classmate, Fluttershy-san.

She was nodding to her friend, Himeko while writing out the notes left on the chalkboard using her mouth. It was always so interesting to watch Fluttershy-san work. Her head weaved left and right as her lips wielded her mechanical pencil between her teeth. Oh, it looked like she made a mistake. One of Fluttershy-san's wings gripped onto her pink eraser and wiped away what mark she made. I could never understand how girls had such neat handwriting.

But I was getting distracted from my purpose. Fluttershy-san wasn't Fluttershy-san, my adorable classmate. She was Fluttershy-san, a horse! Suddenly, I saw my chance. I stood up, calling all eyes on me and even Sensei Giro fell silent as they waited for what I had to say. I cleared my throat and ready my lungs to reveal the lie-piercing truth!

“Is a horse present?” Is what I wished I said. But I fell into a wheezing cough from taking in too much air and then my ignorant classmate Yosano called out.

“Is anyone hoarse present?”

The classroom broke in laughter and I shrunk into my seat, humbled. You would have thought that I learned my lesson. I've never been liked in class. Heck, I've never been liked in the whole school. Everyone called me Shijiro's brother. Shijiro's leftovers. Just because I'm not a weirdo like my bro. If I didn't act like him, nobody would give me the time of day.

But if I could get my club together, all of that would change. I'd finally be my own person with my own rules! And if I had to channel my brother to get some respect, I'd do it!

At the end of my wits, I decided to sneak into the girls' locker rooms before gym practice. My brother always bragged of there being the perfect locker that the girls never used but gave a full view of the show. And by show, I mean that you could see both the girls undressing and showing from the angle the lockers was positioned.

I had no impure reason to spy on the girls. It was only Fluttershy-san that I was after. I was sure that even if I was caught, it wouldn't count because horses don't have private parts. Inside the locker, I watched the girls enter the room and with the phone on hand, I waited for the perfect shot. The girls started undressing. It was a paradise of lace and silk, of cotton and animal print being taking off creamy thighs and round mounds.

There was an embarrassing thump hitting the metal door.

Thank god, it was only my knee.

Luckily, there was a pack of girls talking to Fluttershy-san to hear my little thump. Encouraging her to come with them on their next shopping trip.

I watched Fluttershy-san gently undo her buttons and saw her white collar shirt flutter to the floor. My heart leaped into my throat as I beheld the strip-tease. If only Fluttershy-san didn't turn her back towards me, I could see the color of her bra. Why was I getting so hot? She's a horse, damn it! A talking horse! I'm not invading her privacy and getting to watch a peep-show!

Even so, I wondered if she when would take her skirt off. For observation purposes, of course! Fluttershy had a long, flowing tail that trailed after her. Humans don't have tails. So if I took a shot of her showering, she would have a tail attached to her skin, proving that she wasn't human. I readied to take a photo and moved the phone to look through the metal grate. But then the locker door that none of the girls cared about, opened.

“There's a boy!” Someone screamed and I tried to explain myself. I just wanted a picture of Fluttershy without her panties! I didn't care about the other girls!

A sea of fists smashing into my face was the only thing I remembered.

I woke up in the nurse's office, bandaged and a painfully swollen face. I groaned in pain and in the fact, I wasn't able to prove that Fluttershy-san was a horse. More than that, I couldn't prove that I was better than my brother, that smug-ass. I turned to my left and saw Fluttershy reaching over me with a cotton-dab in her mouth, gently rubbing floral scents around my head. It made the skin feel slightly better.

“...Fluttershy-san?”

“You can call me Fluttershy-chan, Oushima-kun.”

“Fluttershy-chan, are you a horse?”

Fluttershy-chan froze, her yellow wings quivering before she answered.

“No.”

I felt utterly crushed. There was nothing that I could do to prove myself better than my brother.

“I'm a pony.”

Author's Note

Post edit: Changed Shijro's name to Shijiro.