“Howdy there Rainbow Dash.”
“Hey AppleJack, Hi guys” The Cyan colored mare drifted down from where she was hovering, then moved into the booth to join her friends. They had all began meeting at Sugar-Cube Corner for a weekly get together and to catch up on any news or gossip.”
Rarity eyed her pegasus friend with a tad of worry. “Are you alright dear? You look positively dreadful. Your mane is even more disheveled than it usually is, as impossible as I thought that could ever be.”
Rainbow Dash let Rarity’s remark about her mane slide by, knowing better than to get into any kind of discussion about “proper” appearances with the fashionista pony. “Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Just didn’t get much sleep last night is all.”
Out of nowhere a pink pony popped up and placed a large milkshake down in front of her. “Ooh.. Some pony up all night being naughty with her new special somepony?” Pinkie giggled as she nudged the glass closer to Dash and leaned in, “Spill it sister, and don’t leave out any of the juicy details.”
“Pinkie Pie!” Twilight scolded, but was obviously just as interested in what naughty tidbits her friend might let slip as well. “I’m sure if Rainbow Dash has anything she’d like to share she will.” The purple pony then magically levitated a small notebook and quill from her saddlebag, “and if she does, hopefully she’ll do so in as much detail as possible..(sqwee).”
“Pshhh, I wish!” Rainbow grumbled. “Sorry guys. Nothing to report here other than we broke up last night.”
“What! But darling, why?” The concern obvious in Rarity’s voice as she placed a comforting hoof on Rainbows shoulder. “Whatever was the matter? You two seemed like such a good couple?”
“What was the matter? I don’t think I could find a colder fish, even if I was to go grab one straight out of a frozen lake is what the matter was. I mean, nine dates, NINE! The closest we came to any kind of REAL fun was him hoofing me off a little while we were kissing last night. Even then he acted like he was doing me some GRAND favor. The guy finally starts to get me worked up properly, then he just stops and backs away. He even had the nerve to get all high and mighty and say I was moving too fast for him! What a tease! With all the Bits I’ve blown on dinners and flowers and stuff for the guy, I don’t think it’s asking too much for a good BUCK now and then! Guess he thought otherwise since he stormed out all indignant and angry.” Rainbow gave an angry snort and added, “Guy was probably just a closet stallion sucker anyway.”
“RAINBOW DASH!” Fluttershy shouted. Well, it was more of an urgent whisper than a shout really. Just slightly above the noise level of a butterfly’s wings beating, but for her it was a shout. The yellow little pony glared at Rainbow dash disapprovingly. “Stallions aren’t just hunks of meat you know! You have to treat a stallion with respect and kindness if you expect any kind of relationship to grow.”
Dash sighed and rolled her eyes then slumped down in her seat. “Yeah Fluttershy, I know. I’m just saying it would be nice not to have to go home after every date and clop off to get some relief.”
“Well… yes um… I can understand that.” Fluttershy paused then muttered a “believe me I can really REALLY understand that. Still you have to be patient.” Her eye twitch slightly as she added, “Even if we all know they are all really asking for it deep down.”
“What?” Rainbow had already began ignoring the generally shy pony for the most part so that last bit caught her by surprise.
“I mean umm, you know. You can’t just grab some random stallion off the street. No matter how much they all trot around asking for it.” A glassy look started to come over the little yellow pony’s eyes “Even if, umm... Sometimes.. Just sometimes you just want to...” She got a dreamy faraway look. “Feel the NEED to..,(pant pant) to..” Her face suddenly grew a deep blush and her breathing quickened.
“Umm Fluttershy?” Twilight looked worriedly over at the panting pony who was rubbing her hoofs together in an evil manner and seemed to be off in her own little dream world. An odd giggle then escaped the yellow pony’s lips as a small line of drool began to flow from the corner of her mouth as she continued her mumbling rant.
“Just throw one down… (pant gasp). Right there in the middle of the street… (groan) YES! (gasp) and.. and (puff puff). BUCK HIM! BUCK HIM HARD AND LONG, LIKE THE NAUGHTY LITTLE PLOT TEASING STALLION HE KNOWS HE IS! RIGHT THERE, IN THE OPEN, FOR EVERYPONY TO SEE!”
They all grew quiet and just stared at the little yellow mare breathing hard and giggling maniacally to herself as her naughty little day dream unfolded in her mind. After a while Fluttershy seemed to snap out of her sexy imagined fun and noticed her friends shocked stares. There were all looking at her with open mouths. She promptly turned an impossibly deep shade of red, right before passing out in shame.
“Wow,” Rainbow dash said with a chuckle. “It’s always the quiet ones you have to look out for I guess.”
Applejack pushed her hat back and laughed. “Yes sir, ain’t that the truth! In fact, I don’t think I’ll be letting Big Mac be anywhere alone with Flutter’s for a while, especially after hearing that. Least till that crazy little filly gets herself a stallion of her own.”
Rainbow suddenly sat up straight and looked over at AppleJack. “Hey speaking of your brother, Is he seeing anyone right now?”
“You can just forget whatever you’re ah thinking right thar Rainbow Dash. Granny Smith would have herself a darn right fit ifin Big Mac was ta fool around with any filly before he was married proper like. It would tarnish the Apple name. ‘Sides which, a sister has to look out for her brother. Especially knowing what us mares are really like when it comes ta stuff like this. No offense Rainbow, but ma’ brother ain’t no easy whoares ya can buck when yall need to just blow off some steam ya know.”
“Yeah I guess. It’s just, Ughh!” Dash threw up her hooves in frustration. “Why can’t stallions just be a little more like us mares when it comes to wanting to have a good time?”
“Ha! In your dreams darling. No stallion spends as much time thinking about.. err..well “ Rarity paused waving a hoof in the air trying to come up with a lady like way of saying what she meant.
“Bucking?” Pinkie offered up cheerfully, not missing a beat.
The marshmallow pony made a sour face at the crude word but nodded and decided to just go with what her pink blunt friend used. “Yes.. “bucking” as it were, as much as mares do.”
“I hear ya sugar cube,” AppleJack laughed. “I swear if any stallion did have half an idea what was on a mare’s mind most of the time, he’d probably never set a hoof out his door again.”
They all laughed and snorted as they sipped at their milkshakes and continued to make crude jokes about stallions and their uses.
“Hey guys!” From across the small shop a tall bipedal creature called out to them as he entered and then moved fluidly towards the six with a big smile on his face.
“Nonny!” Pinkie squealed and jumped up running over and throwing herself at him.
Anon laughed and scooped the bundle of pink energy up in his arms and carried her back with him. “Hey there Pinks, how you been?”
“Better now that you’re here Nonny.” The Pink pony giggled and snuggled down in his arms.
Anon absent mindedly started scratching behind Pinkie’s ears and running his fingers through her cotton candy like mane. Much to the pleasure of the goofy grinning mare, who got more than a few jealous stares from several of the other mares in the shop.
“Sorry for being late. So, how are my favorite six mares this morning, and what’s the topic for today?”
They all grew suddenly quiet, uncomfortable with carrying on their earlier discussion around a stallion. Well technically Anon wasn’t a stallion, but he was still male, and they didn’t want their friend to feel uncomfortable around them. Sexual or rapey comments in mixed company was a good way to get yourself in trouble with the Stallion-ists.
About this time Fluttershy had just started to finally come too, and looked blurry eyed over at Anon with a smile. The tall alien they had come to know over the past year and a half as Anonymous had terrified her at first, but had slowly won her over with his caring and open nature. Of course his willingness to casually and quite often give belly rubs or ear scratches hadn’t hurt either. He was like a stallion, but with the boldness of a mare. Never shying away from giving a pony some comforting physical contact. Because of this he had also recently become the main star in many of her last few clopping sessions.
“Umm, hello Anonymous,” the yellow mare blushed as she waved a shy timid hoof at him and smiled.
“Hey F.S.” He waved back and placed Pinkie Pie down on the seat next to him as he took his place in the booth.
“Careful nonny,” Pinkie warned as she tapped his chest. “Flutershy was just telling us how she was planning to find somepony to hold down and buck in the middle of the street. You should watch yourself.” Pausing a moment she tapped her hoof to her chin in thought before she continued. “Unless of course that’s your kinda thing. In that case, you should be sure and let me know so I can come watch. Oh oh and give me enough time to make some popcorn.”
“EEP!” THUD! Fluttershy had passed out again, this time face planting right onto the table.
Anon laughed loudly at the silly pink pony and tousled her mane. “Ok Pinks, I’ll try and give you enough time to find a good seat for the show if that ever happens.” The very notion of course was ridiculous. Besides her being a pony and him a human, he doubted very much the painfully shy pony would even be able to stay conscious long enough to tell someone she liked them, let alone try and commit rape. This was after all the same pony he’d seen nearly have a panic attack when a butterfly landed on her nose. He gave Pinkie a wink thinking it was just another one of her weird random utterances. The other ponies though all groaned at their friends inabilities to understand the difference of what should and should NOT be said sometimes. Especially in mixed company.
Looking across from him Anon noticed Rainbow Dash slumped down in her seat and looking depressed. Usually by now the Cyan colored mare would already be half way through a spiel about some new trick she’d learned or another tale of the “Fantastic Wonderbolts”.
“You ok Rainbow?”
Before she could answer Rarity offered up an explanation. ”She was just dumped by her special somepony, the poor dear.”
Rainbow sat up indignantly. “Hey I wasn’t ‘Dumped’. I just decided that he wasn’t worth stopping from leaving me is all.”
Anon raised an eyebrow at this, and Rainbow tried to keep her smug appearance up before just sighing and slumping back down. “Yeah yeah ok, so I was dumped, big deal.”
Getting up Anon moved over to sit beside her and comfort her. “His loss Rainbow.” He said as he moved his hand to scratch along the blue pony’s neck.
“I guess,” she mumbled beginning to enjoy Anon’s talented fingers despite her depression.
“Aw come on Dash this isn’t like you.” Turning and leaning down he gave the cyan colored mare a big hug and placed a friendly kiss on top of her head before continuing to gently stroke her side. He knew how much the colorful ponies enjoyed all the rubs and scratches and hoped he could improve her mood a bit.
Unfortunately, still not very familiar with pony culture or the intricacies of Pegasi, his feather light touches were caressing up and down the length of one of Rainbow’s folded wings in what any winged mare would consider a very erotic manner. Immediately the small pony grew silent and began to fidget around. She glanced up seeing Anon smiling down at her innocently. She gulped and then took a quick glance around the table seeing none of her other friends had noticed exactly where he was touching her or how. They might not even be aware of what exactly he was doing with her even if they did. The only other Pegasus here was Fluttershy and she was currently passed out. Twilight was most likely to new to her own wings as an Alicorn to even know what being given a “Wing Job” meant. She shuddered slightly as she felt Anon’s fingers, oh those wondrous fingers work over the crook of her wings and slightly down into her feathers. She was beginning to gasp slightly. She knew she should stop him. It was an innocent mistake on his part, but if she continued to let it happen she would most definitely be taking advantage of him.
Noticing the depressed pony starting to perk up Anon dug his hand deeper into the fold of Rainbows wing, twirling his fingers through her feathers.
"Oh my Celestia where did he learn how to give such an amazing Wing Job. Was it just because of those weird wormy things at the ends of his hands that made this feel so amazing? If so 'fingers' could quickly become a new fetish for her. A quick thought as to what kind of delights they could provide other areas of her body crossed her mind. She rested her head back against Anon's chest and let her tongue roll out a little as small stars of pleasure popped before her very eyes.
Anon looked at Rainbow and noticed her making goofy faces at him and smiled. She must be feeling better at least and pulled her closer to him redoubling his rubbing efforts.
"Stop this now Rainbow, before it goes too far." She mentally chastised herself. "A friend doesn't let a friend unknowingly rub one out for them. Pull away... PULL AWAY!" She didn't though. Instead she leaned harder into him as she felt the teasing fingers increase their pleasure. She had just been so frustrated the last month. Always on the brink but never getting there with her now ex colt friend. Now her head was buzzing with pleasure and all she wanted to do was yell out in ecstasy, not tell him to stop. She noticed Twilight looking at her funny as she tried to contain her squirming and little gasps of delight to hide what was going on.
Just then Anon's fingers traced back along the edge of the wing nearly to the tip, then started giving small teasing rhythmic squeezes back down its length toward where her wing met her body. This brought a barely audible "Celestiaaaayesss" from her and caused her hips to buck forward involuntarily. She placed both forehooves against the table’s edge to brace herself. Knowing what a “Wing Job” was or not, a mare knows what it looks like when another mare is being pleasured. There was no hiding what she was experiencing from the other ponies, even if Anon was still oblivious to it all. She had now gotten the attention of Rarity and AppleJack as well. Pinkie Pie smiled mischievously and began chatting with Anon about random things attempting to keep him distracted enough to finish what he had started for Rainbow. She could tell Twilight was just about to say something when all hell broke loose.
Feeling Rainbow moving around like she was Anon thought she must just be ticklish around the wing area. No doubt trying not to burst out laughing and ruin her "cool" appearance. A thought crossed his mind on how to possibly cheer her up as well as play a little prank on her at the same time. He quickly slid his other hand down to the wing closest to him in preparation for a full on duel wing tickle attack.
Several things happened very quickly in the next few seconds.
Anon dove both hands directly under Rainbow Dash’s wings, right at the base where they meet her body and began dancing his fingers around madly.
Rainbow Dash’s Wings both ‘POMF' out, extending in full Wing Boner style as she growled out in a deep low tone.. “Oh CELESTIA Yes, YES!” and started to shake violently before biting down on her lower lip in an attempt to quiet her cries of pleasure in the small cafe. Her flank bucked upward several times out of her seat as if ridding a phantom lover as her orgasm crested over her senses and crashed down upon her.
At the same time Anon was suddenly violently tossed sideways out of the booth by Rainbow’s sudden wing expansion, followed closely by the nearby milkshake that promptly bopped him on the head and poured its creamy contents down his face. He was so busy wiping thick cold melted ice-cream out of his eyes that he missed seeing Rainbow dash continue to shudder and give little spastic jerks with her hips. As the orgasaming pony grinned in bliss laden pleasure riding out the waves of her orgasm. Slowly coming down from her long denied release Rainbow shuddering slowed. To Anon’s still ice-cream coated eyes it merely looked like she was at the end of a giggle fit brought on by his sudden tickling.
Several booths away a mint green unicorn was franticly waving down a waitress only to point at Rainbow Dash and demand,
“I’ll have what’s she’s having.” From the confused waitress.
“What the hell Rainbow,” Anon complained while still trying to wipe the gooey ice-cream off his face. I’m all sticky now.”
Rainbow chuckled and turned to look down at him with half lidded eyes and a serene blissful look of relaxation on her face. “You’re not the only one all sticky now stud.”
“Huh?”
Pinkie quickly hopped out of the booth and began helping Anon up. “Come on Nonny, Let’s get you cleaned up.” She giggled and then gave Rainbow dash the pony equivalent to a "thumbs up" then guided the confused human toward the back of the shop to find a wash cloth and some water.
Now sitting in the booth with Rarity, AppleJack, Twilight and a still passed out Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash waited for the inevitable chastising she knew must be coming from her friends. She couldn't bare to see what must be accusing glares coming from them and what she'd just done in a public place with a good friend no less.
“What was it like?” Twilight asked eagerly her notepad and quill at the ready. Was it better than what you'd feel with another pony? Would you let him do it again?
“Do those finger thingies feel as good in the naughty places as they do everywhere else?” AppleJack quickly followed up. "From what I saw it sure as heck seems like it to me. I may not have wings, but I darn reckon I can think of a few places I'd like him to wriggle those things into."
Rainbow peeked an eye open in confusion. "Huh?" They weren't mad at her? She looked at their faces and realized instead of being disgusted they all seemed to have gotten worked up themselves watching Anon's pleasure providing digits turn their friend into a shuddering puddle of goo.
“Do… do you think I could convince him to help me..ahhem.. ‘polish’ my horn without coming off to unlady like or suspicious?” Rarity asked with a red face. "I mean, if that dear boy can do that to you without realizing what he just did then I'm sure as Tartarus not going to pass up the chance to have him provide the same oblivious pleasures to me by spit polishing my horn with those hands of his."
Rainbow smiled wickedly. "I think we can all come up with plenty of excuses to have Anon use those wondrous fingers on all of us."
***********************
Next Time: Princess Celestia comes to visit after reading Twilight Sparkles latest letter on the "Importance of Fingers" and "Fingers are Magic"
Author's Note
I apologize for any typos, grammatical errors and most likely wrongly used pony references. It’s a rapidly typed up lite clop piece.
Note: The following is not meant as a social commentary, example of real gender reactions or beliefs. All situations are absurd and extreme, as are the thoughts and reactions of the characters placed in them. It takes place in a version of Equestria where the gender roles are reversed. Where mares generally take the dominate role in initiating a relationship. Where a stallion who sleeps with too many mares can earn a bad reputation, but a mare who beds a lot of stallions is praised by her fellow mares. Where a gentle mare holds a door open for a stallion by day, and drunkenly spews cheesy pick up lines at them in bars at night.
Also due to the high ratio of mares to stallions, and a stallions need to be modest in their society, most mares are sexually frustrated to the point of near insanity. Now drop in one unrealistically oblivious human male who still has not grasped the finer points of pony culture and likes to randomly pet and touch a pony at any time. This is meant as a joke. An admittedly poorly written one, but not meant to be taken seriously or as sexist, just absurd.
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Chapter 2 Horn-ing in on a good thing.
Rarity and Twilight giggled with mischief as they whispered ideas back and forth to each other on how to trick Anon into touching their horns.
Fluttershy sat with her front hooves crossed in front of her looking somewhat annoyed. When she’d finally came to and found out what had happened, she was livid. She had “Shame on you all,” and “How could you?” at them for several minutes. She wasn’t actually angry that no one had stopped Anon from Winging Off Rainbow Dash. Even that no one told him what he was doing was morally wrong, just that no one had woken her up in time to watch.
As for Rainbow Dash, she just sat slumped way down in her seat with a blissed out look on her face and a goofy grin on her lips not caring much about anything.
“Trust me on this Rarity. I’m telling you he’ll fall for it.” Twilight seemed confident on what she had come up with.
Rarity eyed Twilight with no small amount of doubt. If the purple pony’s plan failed she’d end up spending the rest of the day cleaning milkshake off her horn and out of her mane with nothing to show for it.
Applejack just rolled her eyes as she listened in. “It’ll never work. Anon may be something of a BimbPony when it comes to a little tickle and spank, but he’s not rock stupid ya know. There is no way he’d fall for a plan as foolish as that.”
Fluttershy nodded her agreement. “Applejack is right. We, umm… need to approach this like civilized ponies.”
“Thanks Sugarcube.” Applejack smiled, “I’m glad to hear I’m not the only mare here not thinking with her plot.”
“Oh my yes.” Flutters kept nodding. “We umm, don’t need to traumatize the poor dear after all.” She put on her best motherly expression. “Things like this are umm, you know? Best done in a way that causes the least umm, amount of problems…, and memories.” She then placed a small bottle of pills on the table.
“HOOFIES!” The three ponies gasped in unison, then all quickly looked around to see if anyone had heard them. Rainbow Dash having slipped off to sleep by this point only contributed a light snore.
Applejack snagged up the bottle and hid it down under the table before anyone saw. “We are NOT gonna hoofie up Anon,” she stated firmly. “Were in tarnation did ya even get these things, and WHY are you carrying them around with ya!”
“Oh umm,” Fluttershy glanced around nervously, not wanting to look any of her friends in the eye. “It’s like Twilight always says. It’s good to, you know umm, be prepared.”
“That settles it. Yer not allowed anywhere near my brother till ya get that twisted little mind of yours set straight. Ya hear me gal.” Applejack eyed the yellow pony and slammed her hoof down on the table to emphasize her point.
Fluttershy looked hurt and shocked at her words. “Applejack, the very idea! I would never use hoofies on Big Mac (mumbles) …again…”
“I should hope not. Why I would.., wait what was that last part you just said?” Applejacks question went unanswered as Anon and a trailing and wobbly Pinkie Pie neared their booth.
Twilight seeing them approach, used her magic to quickly levitate a glob of Rarity’s milkshake from her cup and drop it on her fellow Unicorns horn.
“Gah ewww! COLD!” Rarity complained and waved her front hooves around then gave a shiver as she eyed Twilight unhappily.
Twilight just patted her on the shoulder and whispered, “Trust me, you’ll thank me later.”
Anon sat back down next to the sleeping Rainbow Dash and gave her ear a little scratch hoping the little Pegasus would cheer up soon about losing her boyfriend. She snorted a bit in her sleep and muttered “So good… so so good” then snuggled down further into the booth and up against Anon.
“Sorry it took so long guys. It took a while to help Pinkie with her ‘Cutie Cramp’ after I got cleaned up,” he explained.
Pinkie slowly climbed back into the booth on shaky legs. She seemed drained of energy, which was something no pony even thought was possible. A look of deep embarrassment was on her face as the other ponies all gave her funny looks about this so called ‘Cutie Cramp’.
“A ‘Cutie Cramp’?” Twilight said questioningly and raised an eyebrow and looked over at Anon.
“Yeah, she said it’s a pretty common thing. The muscles around a pony’s cutie mark cramp up and they need to work it out with a massage. Figured the least I could do was lend a hand. Must be a pretty serious thing. She seemed to be in a lot of pain as I helped rub around the area what withal the gasping and grunting.”
“Riiiiggghhhtt..” Twilight said in a long drawn out voice while giving Pinkie a sly wink. She realized the crazy pink pony had managed to con the human into giving her a rump rubdown while in the back cleaning up. A little grin came over Twilight as she realized something like this was too good to waste on a one time use. She casually nodded over to Applejack. “You know, Applejack here suffers from really bad, ahem ‘Cutie Cramps’, don’t you Applejack?”
Anon looked over at the earth pony in surprise as well as a bit of worry for her. “Really?”
Twilight continued, “Oh yes! What with all the apple bucking she does on the farm I imagine all her muscles get all tied up in knots. It would probably be a real help to her I’m sure if you could stop by her farm in the evenings and give her the same treatment you gave Pinkie. Isn’t that right Applejack?”
The farm pony’s cheeks flushed as she notice Anon look over at her and place a comforting hand on her shoulder. She struggled with the inner turmoil of lying to the human for a sexual thrill. Glancing at Rainbow Dash still grinning in her sleep, and at the sweaty flush faced and energy depleted Pinkie Pie she longed to feel what they had. She knew it was wrong though. She adjusted her hat and set her jaw in determination.
Applejack KNEW what she had to say as the Element of Honesty.
Applejack KNEW what she had to say as a friend of Anon.
Applejack KNEW what she had to say as… as…, as a mare who hadn’t bedded down a stallion in a little over a year and was so horny she could buck a barrel of apples to applesauce.
“It’s true alright, I get ‘Cutie Cramps’ sum thang awful sometimes.” She was going to lie her plot off, to get her plot off. “Why, I can barely make it back from the fields some days. I’d be downright grateful if you would give my plot… err I mean my ‘Cutie Cramps’ a go at with those wondrous hands of yours in the evenings. I’d even be willing to fix you up some supper afterwards.”
“Throw in a slice of that marvelous apple pie of yours and you have a deal Applejack,” Anon laughed well naturedly as he agreed and patted the farm pony on her hat.
Across from her Fluttershy eyed her with a smug smile and then held out her hoof, to which Applejack sheepishly handed back the small bottle of pills. It’s hard to be high and mighty when you’re wallowing in the same lust pit as your friends after all.
“Speaking of help darling,” Rarity stammered as she motioned up at her horn. “I seemed to have gotten some of that milkshake Rainbow Dash so unlady like spilled everywhere on my horn. I was wondering if you would be a dear and, “She gulp loudly, “Help me clean it off.”
“Sure Rarity, here let me just,” Anon reached across the table and ran a finger up the side of Rarity’s horn, trailing up a large glob of milkshake to the tip and onto his finger before popping it into his mouth and licking it clean. He began repeating the same process over and over.
Rarity went cross-eyed, and her tongue slithered out from between her lips to hang in a comical expression. The moment his finger made contact with her horn her world had exploded into a dazzling array of lights and pleasure. She shivered, then drew in a deep breath and seemed to just hold it, almost as if her body had forgotten how to exhale. The sensation was something she’d never felt before, never expected to feel this good, this amazing. She’d been with her fair share of stallions. Had her horn handled, rubbed, stroked and even sucked on occasionally before, but THIS! This was beyond anything she knew. She let out the breath she’d been holding in a stuttering gasps and slurred, “Rarity good feel, happy time now, yessss!”
Twilight grinned, her friends reaction was confirmation of what she thought might happen if Anon directly interacted with a Unicorns horn. She knew Anon was magic neutral at best. In fact he was so un-magic he practically gave off a field that tended to interact oddly in the presence of the higher forms of magic itself, like say… a unicorns horn. It’s something she’d theorized might happen when she first noticed the effect he had on magic infused items, as well as the reactions to his touches from any pony he came in physical contact with. It was probably the reason all his touches, caresses and tickles felt far better than they should have to all of them. Every pony had at least some small spark of magic in them to react to it.
She could just imagine the kind of feedback loop Rarity’s magic center must be experiencing being directly touched, and how it was heightening and magnifying every sensation a thousand times over. Rarity’s pleasure centers of her brain were processing things at levels they were never meant to. Twilight was slightly worried about the possibility of some short term brain damage, and the likelihood of a narcotic like effect something like this might have on a Unicorn. Especially seeing as how much more magic they held than say, and earth pony or a Pegasus, but research sometimes means sacrifice. She watched Rarity drool on herself and then glanced under the table to see a steady stream of the fashion pony’s juices running down the booth seat to puddle under the table. Of course Unicorns could always get off on a horn job, but this was something way more. She was sure Celestia and Princess Luna would be very interested in her report. After all Alicorns not only had wings and horns to pleasure, but were some of the most magic infused beings in all of Equestria.
Anon continued to work his fingers up from the base to the tip scooping and wiping up glob after glob of the runny milkshake residue. Rarity just drooled and babbled nonsense, giggling and giddy and shaking so much he had to grab the base of her horn with his other hand to hold her still. He had just been popping his finger into his mouth, licking up the residue then running it back down the length of her horn again to get more. He was a bit curious though as to why it kept tasting more and more like marshmallow topping, and less like the strawberry flavor it should have been. It also seemed to be getting stickier and messier the more he tried to clean it. He was going to stop, having figured he’d gotten as much of it off as he thought he could when Fluttershy’s hoof shot out and stopped him.
“You’re not done yet,” She husked out and gave him an odd smile. “It’s still dirty Anon.” Fluttershy stared deep into his eyes and repeated the word, “Diiirrrtttyyy!” in a low drawled out way as she placed his hand back on Rarity’s horn. “In fact, umm, maybe you should lick it to make sure you are really really getting it clean. Go on Anon,… lick her horn… you KNOW you want to.”
“Geeze Fluttershy I don’t know, that’s seems a little, uhhh,” he paused and looked around suddenly feeling uncomfortable with the whole situation.
That’s when he noticed that every mare in the place was staring at him and what he was doing. Their mouths were open in shock and a lot of them also seemed to have a dreamy or wanton look in their eyes. He sat there with his hand wrapped around a shuddering Rarity’s horn, not sure what to do next. They all seemed to be waiting for him to make his next move though. Keeping an eye on them all he reached out again and very slowly drew his finger along the horn.
Rarity was a shambles by this point. All she could do was grunt and utter a barely recognizable babble that sounded a little like, “me likey horn touchy” and let out a stream of drool and a long “duhhhh”.
Anon didn’t pay much attention to her at the moment though since he was more interested in why everyone was suddenly focused on him. He had a suspicion it could have something to do with his helping Rarity with her problem though. He then moved his sticky finger up to his lips and noticed all of them seem to gasp in anticipation of what he was about to do. He paused and they all held their breaths waiting. He popped his finger into his mouth and again tasted the overpowering marshmallow flavor.
Gasps and little moans were heard from all over the shop. He heard an especially loud hissed out “YES! Bon Bon’s not gonna believe this!” come from a small mint green pony who had what appeared to be a cellphone out and pointed at him recording the whole event. One hoof worked her cell while the other was below her table doing something franticly, but he couldn’t see what. In fact most every mare in the place had their hooves down under their tables, including one stallion sitting near the carrot cake display in the corner. A very uneasy feeling came over him as he slowly looked back at the mares sitting with him in the booth. The sounds of what he could only describe as something like hooves being pulled out of thick mud, only to squishy squash back in again over and over was coming from under their table. That along with a steady rhythm of clop clop clop seemed to be coming from every table in the place now that he was listening for it. Twilight, Pinkie Pie and Applejack all stared intensely at him as he slowly stopped polishing Rarity’s horn and a look of slow realization came over him.
Evidently Fluttershy seemed to notice the change in Anon’s expression as the wheels of his mind slowly began to turn. Their hot monkey fun could come to an abrupt end if he finally realized what was going on. She couldn't have that, not till she'd had a turn at least. She quickly flew up and then landed off to the side of their table next to him and turned his head toward her with a very wet hoof . “Umm Anon, would it be alright if umm, I asked you a question?”
He thought her hoof smelled a little like lemon meringue pie for some reason, but wasn't really paying much attention to her or her words really. He seemed on the brink of having some kind of epiphany about PonyVille, and all the ponies in it, and as it formed in his mind it troubled him, but he wasn't sure why yet. He replied with a flat mumbled out, “Sure Fluttershy, what is it?”
Fluttershy smiled happily and held up one of the napkins she’d grabbed from the table. “Tell me Anon, Umm, Does this smell like chloroform to you?”
“Huh?”
Then blackness.
Author's Note
To those of you who stayed with me through this typo ridden grammatical hell of a story I thank you and hope you got some small enjoyment out of it. I'd like to thank those who generously offered to help with editing, even though I didn't take advantage of it for this draft like I should have. I just wanted to get this story out and be done with it. This was my first story and most likely my last. Now back to quietly lurking in the shadows for me. :)
