In The Forest

by Bazing

Rating: teen
Tags: Alternate Universe, Human, Main 6, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Adventure, Random, Princess Celestia
Length: 2894

During my 18th birthday, my step-dad took me shooting. Suddenly, I get transported to a strange jungle.

For my 18th birthday, my step-dad decided to take me shooting. It was fun, and I was surprisingly good at it. However, unfortunately for me, fate decided I wasn't meant for this world. Suddenly thrown into a strange jungle, where I try my hardest to find a way out.

Too bad for me, the jungle is too large, so I decide to settle down.

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A Semi-Prequel to Embodiment of Rage. Set before the meeting with Luna and Celestia. This is also not needed to be read in order the understand EoR.

(Self-insert (again))
(Mature language warning)

Published 2015-04-27 17:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-04-27 17:10:01 UTC

In The Forest

Author's Note

A kind of prequel to my Embodiment of Rage story.

In The Forest

I wanna live in the forest forever

Joe Duplantier

I remember that day like it was yesterday. Unfortunately, I have no idea exactly how long ago it was. I think... 5 winter cycles? So 5 years... That day of my 18th birthday. My step-dad took me shooting. It was fun, and I was surprisingly good at it. Yet, for some reason, things didn't work out for me. The moment I grabbed another gun, it all went white.

After that I can only remember the accursed forest. The place I survived in - somehow - for 5 years.

It was hell.

5 years ago

Eyes aching, I vigorously blinked them, trying to get this infernal white out of my view. Rubbing my eyes for good measure I slowly opened them. Only to see dense forest all around me.

"What the fuck...?" I looked around and only saw more forest. "WHAT THE FUCK?!" I shouted. Panicking, I swirled my head around in all directions, trying to look for a sign. A sign that this was all fake.

Not seeing anything but forest, I bolted. I ran in any direction for a few minutes before stopping. Panting I took another look around. Okay Julian, calm down. I need to find a way out of here but I can't do that if I'm panicking. I took a few deep breathes to calm myself. Okay, first order of business.

I made a mental to-do-list.

1. Search the area for any food. I'm fucking hungry
2. Search for water. That shit'll be helpful later.
3. Find a way out of this place.

"Okay, let's get out of here." I won't even bother thinking of a direction. I simply started walking the way I was facing.

A few hours later and I decided to stop. Tired, hungry and thirsty, I collapsed on the ground. Breathing heavily I wiped sweat off my face. Okay, so objective one is still in progress... Maybe if I had some kind of weapon... Looking around I spotted a large branch that fell off a tree. I got up and walked towards it and picked it up. I then started to break bits off to make it a suitable size. Lacking a sharp end, I looked around for a rock I could use to sharpen it. It took me a few minutes but I finally found one.

After about 20 minutes of grinding I finally had a sharp stick about the length of my body - 2 metres - to use for hunting. I still need something to use up close. I thought, so I decided to use the rock as a hammer for now, until I found a suitable weapon.

Okay, so maybe I should go all 'hunter gatherer' on this bitch. A rustling to my right drew my attention. Holding my makeshift spear in hand I faced the bushes. Out popped a small rabbit. It stared at me for a minute before retreating back into the bush. Well I found dinner. Never tried rabbit but I can't be picky. Walking slowly towards the bush I held the spear tightly in hand. Once I reached the bush I swapped the spear for the rock. Weapon in my right hand I used my left to bush the leaves out of the way, prepared to bring down the hammer on any unsuspecting victim.

Once the bush was out of the way I got a clear view of what was under it. A hole. A rabbit hole to be exact. If only I knew how to make rabbit snares! I was hungry and getting angry. I decided to completely uproot the bush and wait around the entrance to the hole.

Unfortunately for me, it took a few hours before the rabbit finally emerged. At this point I was so hungry I wasn't thinking. Acting instantly I leaped from the side and swung the rock as hard as I could at it's head. Only having enough time to face me, the rabbit had no chance. The hard rock connected with it's face, not fully killing it. Walking to it's twitching form I stabbed it with the spear. Now I had some food.

I then started to gather sticks for the fire. Not knowing where to even begin I simply followed Bear Grylls' example. I gutted the rabbit as best I could and skewered it on a long stick. Using two rocks to start a fire isn't easy but it's not impossible. It took me 10 minutes to get a small fire going, then a few more minutes to get a suitable fire. I then held the rabbit over the fire, slowly turning it.

Once it was done I peeled off the skin and ate away. It was alright but it was also terrible, but I didn't care.

The first day done, and my arms fucking hurt.

1. Search the area for any food. I'm fucking hungry - updated, still need food to help with the journey.
2. Search for water. That shit'll be helpful later.
3. Find a way out of this place.

Okay, time to check inventory. After I awoke the next morning and ate the rest of the rabbit - reheated using the ashes and some rocks - I decided to do an item check.

1. Swiss army knife - never leave home without it
2. Makeshift Spear
3. All-purpose rock
4. Two guns from the firing range. No idea what they are.
5. Three magazines for each gun. No idea how much is in each.
6. My wallet. No idea what good that'll do.
7. House keys. Currently useless.
8. Watch, which probably tells me the wrong time anyway.

"Well then... I need some water, bad." Hmmm... If there were rabbits near here then there must be some sort of water source. My logic surprises even me at times. Heading back to the rabbit hole I looked at the angle at which it has been dug. Following the slope, I looked for the second entrance. It took me about 3 minutes to find it but when I did I decided that I should keep going in that direction. Needing to find my way back I marked the trees with the same set of scratches. Three in vertical lines approximately 3 cm apart, with one diagonal through the three. I did this to every 3-4 trees, trying to make it easy for me to find my way back.

Lo and behold. 5-10 minutes of walking I came across a stream. Not thinking properly I ran up to the bank and took a big gulp of water. It wasn't bad but probably not clean either. After realising that I just took a massive gulp of potentially dirty water, I very nearly threw up. I need a way to filter this water. Or a way to carry it back to the fire to boil it.

What, I watch Bear Grylls, so what??

Completely stumped, I looked around for something to carry the water in. I thought about using bark but it didn't carry enough, I thought about wood but it would be hard to find any to carve into a bowl shape.

Eventually I did find a rather large branch. Using my all-purpose rock I attempted to cut off areas to make it smooth and smaller. About 10 minutes later, I had a branch as wide as my torso, as long as my arm and about as thick as my head. Using my all-purpose rock I carved a grove into the middle, making a kind of bowl. This took a total of 4 hours, my lack of experience and fatigue factored into this.

Taking a fair amount of water back to my 'camp', I re-lit the fire and held the 'bowl' over it. Once it boiled and cooled down (which took a long time), I took a big gulp, then went to sleep hungry.

1. Search the area for any food. I'm fucking hungry - updated, still need food to help with the journey.
2. Search for water. That shit'll be helpful later. - updated, stick by the river.
3. Find a way out of this place.

Thus ended my second day in the forest. The rest of my time was similar, wondering aimlessly down-stream, occasionally finding food. There were some instance's that stuck out, but the rest... was all a blur.

By The River

Author's Note

As with my other stories, this will be on hiatus until I either have time to write, or finish year 12
Also, in no way what so ever am I survival expert, so if anyone spots any improvements I could make, don't hesitate to either PM me or post them in the comments.

By The River

On the moss I sit, I want to rest by the river

Joe Duplantier

So in my first journal entry, I forgot to mention something. My birthday is in April, the beginning of Autumn/Fall (depends on what you call it). So naturally, being in Australia, it was rather cold. So this led to me wearing winter clothes, so if anyone who is reading this - better not be - is confused as to how I survived Winter. Well there you go.

Also, lacking any paper and pens/quills, naturally I couldn't have written this in the forest, so I would like to clarify that I am currently NOT in the forest, which I now know to be called The Everfree Forest. It's a good name, I like it.

Celestia, stop looking over my shoulder while I write this.

Yes I know you're there now go away.

Stupid ponies. Think they know everything.

The first week was the worst. I don't even know how I managed to survive for more than 3 days but hey, I did.

My time was spent wondering aimlessly down stream, sticking close to the river, my only source of water. Occasionally I would spot some dinner, but many nights were spent hungry.

It was about this time when contact was made.

As usual, I was following the river down stream. The day was cold and getting colder. It was about mid-day when I first saw them. I can't remember exactly what happened, but I know that I didn't know they were sentient, or even sapient. So, naturally, I thought it was food. The biggest and best source I'd found yet.

The strange pastel coloured horse-thing in front of me was drinking out of the bacterial infested river. Not sure if that would spoil the meat, I took my changes. Silently creeping up and around the creature, I took position. Waiting for the moment to strike.

The leaves rustled. It raised its head, and I lunged. Too little too late, the horse looked at me. Spear through the neck, it died instantly.

Heaving the corpse over my shoulder, I carried it back to my temporary camp. The body was lighter than I expected. It was probably a pony.

I cooked the meat and happily ate until my stomach's content.

The pony meat lasted me a good few days. Being stuck in the forest with barely anything to eat has taught me to conserve food.

It was also around this time when I found a good, thick log. This log would soon become my makeshift-axe. Using my all-purpose-rock, I ground a similar rock into a triangle shape, with a sharp edge to it. Embedding the rock into the log, I tied it together with some weird vine I found, similar to rope but more... vine-y.

I tested my new weapon's durability. I decided it would be best to cut up some wood to use for tonight's fire, so using the axe, I cut up some decent sized logs that could burn for a while.

Yeah it worked, go me. Survival 101 motherfuckers.

Anyway, shit all happened for a while. Just me trying to stay alive, surviving like a boss.

So the next thing I can remember was my first run in with the wood-wolves. Timberwolves I now know to be their 'names'.

It was a few weeks in, and I had given up on trying to find my way out. This place was FUCKING MASSIVE. I'd stuck by the river, and luckily for me, found some weird looking cave when I went off hunting. It's probably also good to mention that I hadn't seen any of those weird looking ponies since that day either. Maybe it was unique? Oh well, tasted just fine.

Anyway... I first saw those Timberwolves when they STOLE MY KILL! Fucking bastards. But seriously, they took my fucking dinner.

It happened when I saw stalking some creature. I'd noticed it's prints, tracks whatever, so I followed it. I soon saw it, just standing there, looking around. Perhaps it noticed me?

Thinking I would be able to kill it in time, I went to strike. Luckily for me I stopped. I could hear it, something growling. I started looking around, trying to search for the source of the growls.

I looked back to the creature I was stalking, and noticed a large wooden-wolf lung straight at it. Claws around it's midsection, and jaws clamped tightly on it's throat, the poor thing didn't stand a change.

More wolves followed and dug into their kill. Knowing I was outnumbered, I slowly crept away, being EXTREMELY careful to not make any noise, knowing that if I did, it would be all over.

It took me a while but I managed to get away from them. The next few days had me on edge and constantly on alert. Hands on weapons 24/7. Sleep didn't come some nights I was so scared.

But this wasn't the last time I would see these wolves, oh no.

That was my first sighting, but since then, they never noticed my presence in the forest. I don't remember exactly when, but it was at least a week and a bit after I saw them that we had our first run in. It wasn't fun...

Just like last time, they were stalking my prey. A deer this time. The same thing had happened, except the only difference was the fact that these wolves had noticed me while attacking their prey. There was a total of four.

Oh fuck my life. I thought to myself. Readying for battle, I grasped my spear tightly in hand. I still had my two guns in case things got serious enough. Luckily for me, I didn't need them.

The first one jumped towards me with amazing speed. Pulling my spear up, I skewered the beast before it could reach me. Little did I know however, that once they died and broke up, they could reform. I soon learned my lesson. The beast reformed right before my eyes.

Shocked, I stared blankly until it was back to its original form. Discarding my spear I quickly grabbed my axe and stab the wolf in the top of the head, successfully cleaving it's face in two.

The others charged almost instantly. I managed to get a lucky shot with my spear by throwing it into the torso of one of the charging wolves, pinning it's hollow body to the ground.

The ones not currently either dead or out of commission, were still charging at me. I blocked the lunge of the closest with my axe, it's teeth inches away from my fingers. I pulled back my left hand and punched it in the face, knocking him back in time for me to barely dodge the lunge of the next wolf. I think I might have also broken a finger, because holy shit punching wood hurts.

Unfortunately he managed to scrape my arm. It wasn't too deep, but it fucking hurt like a bitch.

I ran to the pinned wolf and swung my axe at it's face. I missed, but I still managed to break it's face in two. I grabbed my spear out of it's body and turned around.

The other two wolves were up and about ready to kill me. Spear in one hand and axe in the other, I braced myself.

They charged.

I threw.

It struck. In the face.

One left.

I swung my axe as it lunged at me again.

I missed.

It bit.

It fucking hurt. I dropped my axe in pain and shouted out. I reached to my sides and upholstered my gun.

I gun-butted that fucker in the head. Over and over until the sides of my hand were bleeding from the constant impact with hard wood.

Panting and laying on the floor with dead wood-wolves laying around me, I slowly crawled back to my camp.

Ah fuck, I have no idea how to treat wounds. Silently cursing, I did the thing I thought best. Rinsed the wound with clean, boiled water (obviously cold), and tore a piece of clothing to tie around the wound, hopefully to help stop the bleeding. I'm gonna need to eat a lot of food. I've bled to much. And eat I did. I managed to catch a rabbit that un-knowingly hopped right up to me.

And so ended day unknown in the forest. Time spent in the forest, unknown.