Techinal Difficulties: Lunar Slender

by Swirling Line

Rating: teen
Tags: Other, Princess Luna, Original Character, Comedy, King Sombra, Queen Chrysalis, Random, Crossover, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2901

It's time to film "Lunar Slender." Director Jade Ring hopes to film this story with out any incidents like the year before... Surely nothing can go wrong in the few hours he has to step away, right? ...Right?

After 3 years, Jade Ring is ready to film "Lunar Slender" and wrap up his Slender Mane Trilogy for good. He has the cast ready and willing to film the scenes. His mane cast is eager and Slendy seems to be behaving himself, especially after the chaos that ensued during last year's filming. Surely this year will go smoother then last year...

Published 2015-01-29 04:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-01-29 04:20:02 UTC

What Can Go Wrong?

On the set of Lunar Slender, the director Jade Ring looked around. All seemed calm and normal. Swirling Line, the purple Pegasus, was busy painting away for the sets. Luna, Princess of the Night, was off to the side rehearsing lines. Discord was relaxing on a long thorny vine. The returning Ponyville citizens where buzzing with excitement, rehearsing their dances and putting on makeup and black contact lenses.

Jade took a deep breathe, “All right everyone!” all the ponies looked at him, even one with no eyes, “I have to get some errands done really quick! I don’t want last year to repeat itself! That means…” The green Unicorn looked at the eyeless pony.

Slendy sighed and muttered, “No hard cider… or any alcohol of any kind…” He crossed a pair of tentacles in front of his chest.

“Correct!” The director smiled, “And Swirling… there’s no harness right? Last year you got tangled up in it pretty bad, then you spun around the room a lot… and then you got pretty sick afterwards.”

“Hey!” The Pegasus objected, “That wasn’t my fault!” She shot Slendy a look.

“I know! I know! Still” Jade made a face, “That took forever to clean up.”

“OK… I’ll give you that. Well I don’t have a harness this year, and the sets are almost done. I’m almost finished. And I’ll use my wings if need be.” With a soft purple and white flutter Swirling hovered over the ground.

“Wonderful! I’ll be back! So… no chaos while I’m gone!” Jade started to leave when he stopped. “Oh, and Slender One? Try on your alicorn horns and wings while I’m gone, please.” With that green Unicorn walked out the door.

Slendy sat perfectly still before breathing out. “Well you already took away my liquor… I might as well do that.” He walked to the side where a full-length mirror stood. Brining out his tentacles he looked through the costumes and found his Alicorn costume. “Ah, here we go.” He pulled the white horn up and placed it on his forehead. He smiled, not that anyone could really tell… but he was happy. Then as he looked in the mirror, just in time to watch the horn fall to the ground. His ears followed suit. “Let’s try this again…”

Once again the horn fell down, then it fell for a 3rd time. “All right… maybe the wings will work better.” And they didn’t, they fell down as well over and over.

“Crap… I’m going to need something to hold these up…” and the tall stallion started looking around.

Meanwhile on the other side of the set Princess Luna was rehearsing her script, “Slender Mane, it’s OVER. SLENDER MANE it’s over. Slender Mane IT’S over.” She rubbed her chin and pondered what sounded best. She turned around when she heard hoof steps,

“King Sombra, can I help you?”

The black shadow Unicorn looked serious. “Princess Luna, can I have my horn back?”

Luna looked down at her neck and the red horn that hung there. “No.”

“Please Luna,” he pleaded, “I know its for the show but we’re not even rehashing. Can I please have my horn back? Its embarrassing to watch it hang around your neck.”

Luna paused, “You want your horn back? After you’ve attacked my sister and I? After you used your magic to imprison the Crystal Empire? After you stole the Crystal heart? You never did tell what happened to Crystal Princess before Cadance.” Luna paused, “Did you kill her? I know you enslaved an entire empire. Now how many of those ponies have Post Tramatic Stress Disorder they will NEVER overcome?! And you want it back?”

King Sombra looked up, “Yes.”

“No.”

Sombra snarled and growled. “Give me that horn!” King Sombra jumped towards her. Luna stood her hind legs and held the horn up over his head.

“You want your horn?” The princess sneered as she looked down at him.

“Yes!”

“Come get it!” King Sombra kept jumping up and down as Luna pulled his just out of his reach. “What’s wrong? Am I too tall for you? Ohhh- too slow!” She pulled the horn up just out of his reach for the last time.

Sombra growled then leapt on her. The two fell down, and the horn flew out of Luna’s hoof and landed on the ground. The two ponies watched as it was absorbed into the ground, which then turned black and started to bubble.

“That can’t be good…” Luna whispered as crystals spurted from the ground and started to spread.

Meanwhile Swirling Line had just finished the last of the sets. “Ahh… done.” She smiled and turned around nearly bumping into Queen Chrysalis.

“So, you’re a changeling as well?” The Queen looked at Swirling Line.

Swirling nodded. She closed her eyes a burst of magic appeared around her invisible horn, lighting up its edges then she was engulfed in flames before taking her true form.

Chrysalis looked her up and down, “You are indeed a changeling. You come from a purple hive?”

Swirling nodded.

“How is your hive?”

“I don’t live with my hive…” Swirling rubbed her neck.

“How does that work?”

“I have a husband and we have two little foals.”

“Oh!” The queen smiled, “I have a king now! And we’ll have lots of young ones!” She gave a wave off stage, “Hello sweetheart!”

Prince Blueblood had been sitting on the side of set pushing a creaky board to pass the time. He stopped to look over and wave to the Changeling queen.

Swirling squinted her muzzle, “Prince Blueblood, how’s he as a husband?”

“Oh he’s a prick. But his baby making parts work and that’s what counts.”

The younger changeling looked up. She didn’t know what to say to that. She couldn’t really denie that he was a prick, but to hear his Queen say that? It was definantly unexpected. Would it be rude to confirm this fact? Should she be polite? Did Chrysalis now think of her as a Changeling sister? Or was she still an inferior to her queen title? Swirling was offically lost in thought. Chrysalis didn’t seem to notice her silence, and turned to her.

“Do you know how to make a crib out of our changeling mucus?”

“We can do that?”

“Yes, and its more sturdy then any crib you can buy!” Queen Chrysalis pulled Swirling aside to show her crib making.

Swirling followed, ‘I’m defiantly more on a Changeling sister level here.’

The ponies who were practicing their dance stopped as the ground started to shake. Many of them looked towards Twilight Sparkle.

“Twilight… What’s going on?” Rainbow Dash asked, her voice shaking with the rmyth of the ground.

Twilight looked around, “I honestly don’t- GAH!” Twilight was pulled into the air along with many of the other practicing ponies. The only few who escaped where Rainbow Dash and other Pegasus who where quick to react and had the ability to fly away. Those few looked in disbelief at the others. They seemed to be fine, but they were all in a crystal structure, it was like they were cats stuck in a gaint crystal tree.

“Oh boy,” Dash turned to the other Pegasi, “We better help them out.”

Twilight looked around, “Is every pony OK?” Twilight started to count the ‘yeses’ in her head. When she felt confident that everypony was fine she started to examine her surroundings. “This seems very familiar…”

The crystals spread and grew, and a large crystal came out of the ground and destroyed the make up table, sending the black contact lenses flying onto the black ground.

“Horse feathers!” Applejack cursed, “Big Mac, help me find another lens. I only have one black eye.”

“Yeeyup!” Big Mac was just finishing his own make up. The black-eyed pony started looking with his sister.

The two of them gently lowered themselves and started feeling the ground, sliding their hooves back and forth looking for one of the lenses. Reality started to kick in for AJ.

“This is going to take forever!”

“Yeeyup!”

Off stage Slender Mane laughed evilly. His voice echoed through the building, “Yes… yes… FINALLY!” His tentacles rose high above the ground shaking about. They were holding a tube of superglue. He uncapped it and put the glue on the end of the horn and planted it on his head. Laughing he threw his wings on. He laughed long and loud and looked in the mirror.

“Oh good! They’re staying on!” He smiled nice and wide and skipped away.

“And… done! This is stronger then any crib you could buy.” The queen clapped her hooves together smiling at the crib she made. Swirling examined it, she was impressed.

“And it rocks!” Swirling made the crib sway back and forth. “Wait… do you hear something?”

The ground under the changelings’ hooves started to shake. “What’s that?”

The two were thrown back as a large crystal erupted from the ground and snapped the crib clean in half.

“My crib!!” Chrysalis screamed. Behind her Blueblood started to laugh. Chrysalis’ shock started to melt into pure fury. She had a few choice words for her King…

On the other side of the crystal Swirling Line sat up, and watched a little black line crawl over the ground and more crystals flew up out of the ground. She watched it, first out of curiousity, then out of fear as she realized where the crystals where going. “No! Those took forever!” The Pegasus cried as crystals flew out of the ground near her backdrops. Each and every set Swirling made was pierced. The thin fabrics where sliced into sections with loud rips and tears. In a few short seconds, hours of work was destroyed. “My backdrops!” she screamed.

The purple pegasus was frozen for a moment. Her muzzle wrinkled, her eyes became very shiny. She started to wimper. She fell to the ground, covered her face and began to sob.

Meanwhile back on the other side of the large crystal, Chrysalis was yelling, “DO YOU THINK RASING CHANGELINGS IS EASY?! They all must have a place to sleep. I go out of my way to make a bed for our children and when its destroyed you LAUGH?!”

Her husband cowered under her, “It’s a crib- how hard can it be? You can make more.”

“Then you can make the crib if you think its so easy. And all 500 cribs for the all babies you’re going to give me!” She snarled at him. The prince tried to object but she roared, and he shut up. Chrysalis kept staring daggers at him, so he coughed up some mucus and started to shape it into a crib.

Chrysalis snapped at him, “Make one to start with. Then I’ll examine your craftmanshift.” She walked away and screamed, “Whose crystals are THESE?” Chrysalis’s motioned to the large crystals that had quickly taken over everything.

Princess Luna pointed to Sombra. Her eyes where wide and fearful.

Sombra stood still. He watched the Changeling Queen look around and her gazed stop on him. ‘Why is she looking at me?’ he turned to the left and saw Luna mercilessly ratting him out. “Hey!” Sombra screamed, “Its not all my fault- mmmm MMMMMmmmmm” King Sombra felt his muzzle, it was covered in a thick green fluid that was hardening fast. He looked up and saw Chrysalis hacking and couching. She hacked and spat up a green blob on his hooves and it hardened, trapping his front hooves. He tried to pull away but he couldn’t, and soon he felt the same material land on his back hooves. The king tried to pull any leg away, but it didn’t work. He heard more hacking, more coughing then he felt the last exposed parts of his legs being covered up by muscus. At first it was wet, then it harden very quickly locking him in place.

Pleased with her work the Queen picked up two items from off stage with her magic. One she pulled to her side. The other she pushed to her crying friend. The Pegasus didn’t look up. Chrysalis gently nudged her head with the end of the device. The Pegasus looked up.

“Huh?”

“Swirling Line, do you want revenge for your backdrops?” The queen hovered a bat near Swirling’s head. The artist looked up and took the bat. The queen smiled wide with her own bat. “Lets do this.”

Swirling smiled and turned back into her true form. Her magic held the bat steady and she trotted towards the helpless king.

King Sombra’s pupils narrowed. He became covered in sweat. He turned to Luna and called out, it only came out in muffled grunts. The Princess of the Night started to whistle and walked away. King Sombra screamed mumbled at her. Luna seemed to mutter something about karma as she walked away…

“Finally- Done!” The director entered the set. He stopped when he saw AJ with her muzzle on the ground looking around. “Apple Jack? What’s wrong? Why aren’t you in full costume?”

“The contact lenses fell on the ground and I can’t find another one.”

“Oh. Here let me help you.” Jade took a step and they heard a loud crunch. He froze for a moment and pulled his hoof up. The bottom was covered in black broken bits. “Oh… I’ll get you another one…” He brushed the broken bits away.

The director backed up and bumped into somepony. He turned around. “Oh Slender One! I’m glad to see your horn and wings fit. Glad to see you’re sober.” Jade looked at him. “Your horn isn’t straight though.”

Slendy coughed, “Yes it is…”

“No it isn’t. Fix it.”

“I… can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I…. glued it to my head… and I glued the wings to my side.”

“You WHAT?!” he looked to his side, “the wings aren’t even straight! What did you use?”

A long tentacle pulled out and showed him the bottle. “Superglue?! Slender One, that will never come out! We haven’t even filmed the non alicorn scenes!” He sighed and rubbed his head.

“Rarity!” Jade called out.

The white unicorn’s ear flicked. “Dash, did somepony just call me?”

“Yeah they did. I think it was Jade. He must be back.”

Rainbow Dash was lowering Rarity to the ground. Slowly but surely all the ponies who ended up trapped in the Crystal tree structure were being brought down. With a few finals flaps Rarity’s hooves touched the ground and Rainbow let go of her sides.

“Thank you Darling!” The Unicorn nodded and ran off in the direction of Jade’s voice.

Dash turned around. “OK, who’s next?” Several hooves shot up in the air. “This is going to take awhile…”

Rarity found Jade with ease, “Yes Darling?”

“Can you shave these off the Slender One? He glued them to his head.”

Rarity nodded and her horn lit up, she moved her head to the side and something rose from the costume box. A razor floated up to her side in her blue magic, “But of coarse darling!”

“Thank you!” Jade walked off to see the rest of the set.

“Wait, what? Shave me? No. NO. Noooooo!!!” The tall pony backed away from Rarity.

“Come on now darling,” Rarity cooed, “If you move I might hurt you. You need to be still.”

“WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?!?!” Jade’s voice echoed through the building.

Rarity jumped and the razor nearly landed on the ground as Jade Ring screamed out loud.

“Oh hell no! If you jump like that I’m going to lose an ear!” He jumped away.

“Darling! He isn’t going to scream like that again! That doesn’t count.” Rarity ran after him.

Slendy still ran, “Losing limbs hurts! I don’t want to do it again!”

Meanwhile Jade felt his eyes twitch. His sunglasses fell to the floor. He was in complete shock. The backdrops that had Swirling create where destroyed, completely and utterly destroyed. The set was over taken by large black crystals instead of trees. His cast from Ponyville was divided. There was the helpless group in a large crystal structure trying to wave down a Pegasus like they were taxis. There was the other group on the ground who waited for their friends. About half the ponies were in total costume and the others were only partically done. The last group of ponies were looking for the black lenses on black ground.

Princess Luna was hiding in a corner trying to look innocent. King Sombra was about to become a private piñata for Chrysalis and Swirling Line. Sombra’s eyes seem to scream “Thank you” since it appeared that Jade’s screaming stopped them from hitting him. The two changelings looked at Jade, each with their own baseball bat. Swirling took her bat and took a quick swing at Sombra’s back making a loud thud and his legs buckle; then quickly looked back at Jade, hiding the bat behind her back like she didn’t do anything.

The Slender One kept just out running Rarity and her buzzing razor, which was the only sound that could be heard in the silence stage.

“What happened here?!” The Unicorn looked around.

“Chaos. Pure, and beautiful Chaos. I couldn’t have done it better myself.” Discord laughed joyfully as he lay down on his long thorny vine. “And for the record, this wasn’t my fault.”